![]() Author has written 1 story for Naruto. Name: Illyrian Soul Height: 5'7 Age: I'm still a bit young so to deter any paedophiles out there I shall simply be ''69'' years of age. Weight: Null Favorite Bands/Musicians/Record Labels: (You may find most of these aren't really musicians). Kings of Leon, Eminem, Two Door Cinema Club, Savant, Skrillex, Flux Pavillion, Example, Calvin Harris, Monstercat (great place for dubstep, glitch hop e.t.c.) Avicii Ne-Yo & Nicky Romero (I freakin love Toulouse. If you haven't watched the video, watch it.. now!) Race: African Irish (A.K.A: Black Guy who thinks his Irish) Currently: Secondary School Student Future Job: Hopefully an Orthopedic Surgeon Hobbies: Playing Video Games (PS3 all day), Watching Anime, Hanging out with friends, Sleeping, (Hopefully)Writing/Reading Fanfiction Location: Second planet after Uranus Note : I hate Yaoi. Now i've got nothing against Homosexuals it's just that I will not read Yaoi for a million euro (rephrase that once offered a million). Nah guys I don't just like Yaoi. Really. By the way Naruto is my favourite anime/manga with Bleach coming in second and Inazuma Eleven in third. Since I'm a new author i'm still getting used to this whole writing over 3000 words daily, so if you guys have any ideas or criticism (constructive, by the way, just because i'm a greenhorn writer doesn't mean i'll take shit for anybody. Flamers will find themselves washed away by a torrential flood) Personal Hero: None. I'm a very cynical and skeptical person who will always point out the flaws in everybody. I have no need for ''heroes'' Information: I'm an ok guy 'spose. I am prone to being over sarcastic to the point where it isn't funny any more. ''That's what she said'' and ''Your mom'' are the pinnacle of both my wit and my vocabulary. I'm smart. Rant Time Pairings Naru/Hina 1. Extremely overused pairing. Filter it into the criteria and you get 430 pages with 25 stories per page, that's 10,750 stories with that pairing (not even counting those in crossovers). Compare that to the pairing of Naruto x Female Kyuubi, only has 60 pages with 25 stories per page that is only 1500 stories (which of that, not all are female Kyuubi and not all are pairing stories). 2. Ridiculous settings. Hinata loves Naruto because she admired him throughout the academy as a source of inspiration and courage, correct? Then please tell me why the fuck that a Naruto who had been trained away from the village during his childhood, still has Hinata falling for him when he comes back to take the Genin Exams?! That's the same as saying she is a shallow fangirl attracted to looks and 'coolness'... 3. Ridiculous OOCness. Naruto influenced by Kyuubi to leave the village, develops a deep set hatred for Konoha, falls for Hinata?! Dafuq did I just read? Naruto banished by the village, joins another village, marries Hinata?! What the fuck? Naruto banished for failing the Sasuke retrieval mission, Hinata just ups and decides to abandon her family, friends and village to follow him?! The same Hinata who couldn't form a coherent sentence in his presence?! 4. Naruto himself. Many NaruHina fans fail to see Naruto as an actual living character, choosing to blindly look at Hinata only. Naruto has his own feelings and preferences, which has been shown in canon. It's quite obvious that Naruto's personality quirks are a mixture of his parents, his expressive, out-spoken and brash attitude from Kushina. His learning curve, battle instincts, ramen obsession and taste in women from Minato. Name a redhead in Konoha... none right? Name the closest person with reddish hair... Sakura right? Minato loves Kushina's red hair and Naruto has a crush/love on Sakura, whose hair is the closest thing to red in their village. 5. Naruto's feelings. Due to his lack of a proper upbringing in canon, Naruto is basically ill-informed and dense like a rock. Despite that, he clearly expresses his feelings for Sakura (not saying I support NaruSaku, just a logical explanation of canon). What NaruHina fans are doing is taking a one-sided relationship and declaring that it is mutual, which is not the case at all! When has Naruto ever shown any form of attraction to Hinata, better yet, HOW many times have they actually interacted with each other?! He obviously is not attracted to Hinata so please stop the 'a beautiful girl with midnight blue hair in a hime-styled cut and lavender eyes, he knew it was love at first sight'... Naruto has seen Hinata multiple times... none of which has EVER left him googly-eyed... 6. Hinata's confession. Naruto completely ignored it... not even bothering to confront her about it after the defeat of Nagato. Hell, he didn't even bother to check up on her condition... (I know Nagato had revived everyone but if he cared, he would have shown at least some form of concern). 7. Hinata's feelings. Her love stemmed from admiration, she admired him for his persistent attitude and courage. She claims that watching him improve makes her want to better herself, using him as a source of inspiration. Now does that sound like lovers love or sisterly love hmm? Very much like how a younger sister idolises her 'amazing' elder brother and trying to improve so as to impress him and gain his approval hmm? Her feelings are easy to write-off as sisterly... You can copy & paste this into your profile if you agree with it. Naruto/Kushina She's his freaking mother people!! How sick minded are you?? Tell me would you guys ever bang your mom? Then why would you make anyone? Fictional or not, getting freaky with their own mother. And don't give me any of that ''Their personalities go great together'' NO!. I've seen many a good stories that I've never read because they were Uzumakincest. Besides Kushina's an Uzumaki. They were known for their loyalty. I doubt Kushina in any day an age would even think about having any romantic interest with anybody after Minato. Even if it's an AU and Kushina isn't Naruto's mother I still cringe when I read it. Naruto/Sakura The person who berated him and put him down during their childhood. The person who was pretty much useless through out Part 1. The person who offered to do anything for Sasuke if he would let her come with him. The person who asked Naruto to bring back Sasuke. Not for Team 7. But for her. That person you want to pair with Naruto? No. Just No. Naruto/Fem!Kyuubi (or any other tailed beast) Seriously. Kyuubi. Creature of Mass Destruction. Causes tsunamis and earthquakes with a swing of it's tails. Most powerful tailed beast since the Juubi. Falling for Naruto?. Seriously I just hate this. Make Kyuubi a girl, i'm fine. Make her a bit friendly towards Naruto (this is what pisses me off. Kyuubi creature of hatred, does a complete 360 in personality and now loves Naruto? No). Apparently men are evil while women are good, as the majority of Good!Kyuubi stories are Fem!Kyuubi. I personally just want Naruto to have a Kirabi/Hachibi like relationship with Kyuubi. Mutual friendship (You scratch my back I scratch yours and maybe they get a bit more friendly towards each other). Not some demonic fuckbuddy relationship. Naruto/Harem Oh how I loathe this genre. It seems every one decides since Naruto had a shitty childhood he deserves all creatures with a vagina. I mean seriously! I admit a Naru/Harem done well is a good read but not much authors have the skill to pull it off. Eventually it becomes nothing more than Naruto putting his dick in anything with a vagina. And whats worse he tells them he loves them all equally, while some girl says she's the ''Alpha''. That's impossible to love 15 girls equally and have a girl taking the role of ''Alpha''. Why do you think polygamy is illegal. The women eventually become nothing more than friends with benefits. And worse there is no realistic romantic progression. A girl sees Naruto - Lemon. I mean seriously? No woman is like that. Also Naruto isn't the kind of guy to want a harem. Think about it. Naruto, the lovable knucklehead, who wears his heart on his sleeves and is totally oblivious about women. HA! Better chance of Sasuke actually not recieving a God mode upgrade once every 5 episodes. Think about it. If this CRA bullshit was actually foolproof, then either Minato or Kushina would have been forced to procreate with random people. But they refused and kept loyal to each other. I find it hard to believe that Naruto wouldn't be loyal to one girl. Naruto anime. Seriously Kishi fucked up big time. I mean when I started watching the Naruto anime, I cringed a little whenever Naruto showed up and started screaming about how he liked ramen and how he wanted to become Hokage. I endured it as I hoped Naruto would get more badass in the future. Then the Wave Arc hit and when Kakashi was ''training'' them for Zabuza and Haku, I thought Naruto was finally going to learn something good. Nope! He destroys Haku with Kyuubi's chakra. And then they left Kubikiribouchou there. No seal or even taking it back with them. Nope. I'm like WTF!!. Thats one of the swords of the mist! Probably worth a lot at least if no one wanted to use it. But their like nope, we're just going to leave one of the most powerful swords in history in a backwater country. Again I endured. Then when Chuunin Exam Arc came and all Naruto did was spam Kage Bunshin no Jutsu and beat Kiba with a fart, I knew something was wrong. Then in the 1 month break all Naruto learnt was Toad Summoning I was like what?. Funny the only thing toad related he ever used again was Sennin Modo. Then in the Sasuke Retrival Arc when Naruto promised to return Sasuke, I was like? Bro.. do you have a Brain? If you did bring back Sasuke, Sakura would totally forget you existed! and then when he still kept his promise after Sasuke shoved a Chidori through his chest I was like WTF!!. The worst place to be naive is in a world like Narutos. Even after he learnt that there were a group of 9 S-Class ninja after the Kyuubi he was like. No, Sasuke's more important than my life. It's not like I could be training or anything. Then when I saw the power level difference between Sasuke & Naruto in Shippuden I cried. Sasuke
Naruto Huge Chakra, Rasengan techniques, training with Fuuton, Sennin Modo, Toad Summoning (never uses) & Kyuubi Wow. Kishi really went to town with Sasuke's upgrades and Naruto will probably be the guy that always wins with dumb luck. Seriously Naruto got the short end of the stick. He didn't even get a Suiton affinity like I expected. Sasuke can easily fire a Katon: Housenka while Naruto is creating the Fuuton: Rasenshuriken. FireWind = Explosion. Then Naruto got the Kyuubi cloak which made his speed on par with the Yondaime Hokage & with the Bijuu cloak on the way that will allow Naruto the ability to deflect FIVE simultaneous Bijuudama with one hand, I decided to stick to Naruto fanfiction. Favorite type of Naruto stories
Bloodline!Naruto Dark/Grey!Naruto Smart/Cunning!Naruto Naruto leaving Konoha Naruto becoming a shinobi for either Kumo or Kiri Favorite Naruto Pairings Naruto x Ino - Both have similar personalities, would go great together Naruto x Anko - Both village pariahs, would understand each other Naruto x Mei Terumi - Could be a distant relation to the Uzumaki clan (& she's hot) Naruto x Yugito - Both Jinchuuriki, go great together Naruto x Mikoto Uchiha - She freakin hot & I like to see how Sasuke reacts Bashing I'm Ok with this as long as people don't go overboard with it. I mean seriously? Just because you don't like a character doesn't mean you should bash them to oblivion. I'm ok with minimum bashing, but when you rephrase the meaning bad karma while writing a character, you know somethings wrong. OBITUARY FOR THE LATE MR. COMMON SENSE Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and Maybe it was my fault. Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6 year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition. Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get Parental consent to administer Calpol, sun lotion or a band-aid to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion. Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault. Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement. Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by his 3 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing. |
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