shazzygirl
 Hi I'm Shannon but you can call me Shazzy or Shazza Bazza (Don't ask). I am 19 and at University studying Archaeology. I am very proud of my GCSE results. I live in England. Some of my favorite things: Books: Study series, HP series, THG series, Narnia, Percy Jackson, Heroes of Olympus Films: HP series, Fantastic Beasts, Lemonade Mouth, Narnia, THG, Now You See Me/2, HTTYD, Teen Beach Movie/2 TV Shows: NCIS, NCIS LA, Hawaii 5-0, Bones, Criminal Minds, MacGyver, Warehouse 13, Doctor Who, Top Gear, Pointless, Dragons Defenders/Riders, Horrible Histories Number: 3 Animal: White tiger cubs Clothing: Hoodie Food: Chicken Fajitas Sweet: Dairy Milk Chocolate HP book: 3, 7 PJ book: 3 Colour: Purple Cousin: Stephen HP character: Luna Lovegood PJ character: Zoe Nightshade Author: Quite a few from the books and all the authors on fanfiction! Archaeology jokes What sort of art do archaeologists like best? A: Post-impressionism! What do you call a very, very, very, very, very old joke? A: Pre-hysterical! Why did the archaeologist go bankrupt? A: Because his career was in ruins. Aside from criminology, I’d say archaeology has the highest body count. Archaeology is like most forms of field science. There's a small army of us at every college or military base. Archaeologists dig your features. Archaeologists like it dirty. Archaeologists assume superposition. Archaeologists will date anything. Underwater Archaeologists do it deeper. And under pressure. Archaeologists, experts in dating methods. Post-processualists do it with empathy. All archaeology research is groundbreaking. 50 Shades of Brown. 1. Harry Potter 2. Ginny Weasley 3. Tom Riddle 4. Draco Malfoy 5. Ron Weasley 6. Hagrid 7. Fred Weasley 8. Bill Weasley 9. George Weasley 10. Hermione Granger 11. Sirius Black 12. Remus Lupin 1. Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fic? Do you want to? Hagrid/Sirius - Don't think so. Maybe. 2. Do you think Four is hot? How hot? Yeah Draco is kinda hot. 3. What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant? Remus got Bill pregnant. Nothing good. 4. Can you recall any fics about Nine? Yes quite a few. 5. Would Two and Six make a good couple? Ginny and Hagrid. No. 6. Five/Nine or Five/Ten? Why? Ron/George or Ron/Hermione? 5/10 because they are. 7. What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve having sex? Fred walk in on Ginny and Remus having sex. Nothing good. 9. Is there any such thing as One/Eight fluff? Harry/Bill. Yeah. 10. Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve hurt/comfort fic. Fred/Remus hurt/comfort. You're never alone. 11. Does anyone on your friends list read Three? Tom? I don't know. 12. Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven? Sirius? Yes read. 13. Would anyone on your friends list write Two/Four/Five? Ginny/Draco/Ron? Maybe. 14. If you wrote a Song-fic about Eight, what song would you choose? Bill. Don't know. 15. If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warning be? Harry/Hagrid/Remus. Half blood/breed bashing. 16. When was the last time you read a fic about Five? Ron. Today. 17. "(1) and (7) are in a happy relationship until (9) runs off with (7). (1), broken hearted, has a hot one-night stand with (11) and a brief unhappy affair with (12), then follows the wise advice of (5) and finds true love with (3). Harry and Fred are in a happy relationship until George runs off with Fred. Harry, broken hearted, has a hot one-night stand with Sirius and a brief unhappy affair with Remus, then follows the wise advice of Ron and finds true love with Tom. What title would you give this fic? Unlikely couples. 15. Would 3 and 7 make a good couple? Tom/Fred? No. 16. How would 9 react if 11 died? George and Sirius died. How he is in the books and movies. 17. Who would most likely join the Order of the Phoenix, 6, 3, 9, or 10? Hagrid Tom George Hermione. Hermione. 18. Who would most likely become a death eater, 2, 5, 8, or 11? Ginny Ron Bill Sirius. None (well Sirius as he was framed as a death eater) 19. Who would make a better couple, 6 and 9 or 2 and 4? Hagrid/George or Ginny/Draco? 2/4. 20. Who would you rather have as a sibling, 3, 6, or 7? Tom Hagrid Fred. Fred. 21. Who's more likely to watch TV right now, 6, 9, or 11? Hagrid George Sirius. George and Sirius. 22. Who would you rather marry, 1, 4, 6, 8, or 11? Harry, Draco, Hagrid, Bill, Sirius. Harry or Draco. 23. Write a summary for a tragedy fanfiction about 5 and 9. Ron and George. Moving on. 24. For a fanfiction about 2 and 8, what would the genre(s) most likely be? Ginny/Bill. Family/Hurt. 25. Who would most likely kill who, 1 kill 2 or 9 kill 5? Harry kill Ginny? Yeah right! George kill Ron? Maybe. 26. Who would make the best Author, 6, 9, or 3? Hagrid, George, Tom? Tom. 27. Who's most likely to have more kids than the Weasleys, 4, 6, or 10? Draco, Hagrid, Hermione? Hermione as she is a weasley. 28. Who's better looking, 6 or 9? Hagrid, No, George, Yes. 29. Would you rather adopt 1, 5, 6, or 12 Harry, Ron, Hagrid, Sirius? Harry. Professor Flitwick … does not know where Snow White is. Professor Snape … has no wish to get in touch with his ‘feminine side’. Professor Lupin … has no need for a flea collar. Ever. Professor Moody … the best ‘teaching’ Hoqwarts has seen in a while. Professor McGonagall … does not take herself too seriously. It is a bad idea to tell her. Professor Dumbledore … should be referred to as ‘Professor’, ‘Headmaster’ or ‘Sir’, not ‘Dude’, ‘My Leige’ or ‘Tim the Enchanter’. Harry Potter … is more Emo than Draco Malfoy. Draco Malfoy … disagrees. Hermione Granger … has PMS and a wand. Ron Weasley … is very afraid. Luna Lovegood … is perfectly sane, thanks very much. Ginny Weasley … wants her Hogwarts toilet seat. Fred Weasley … knows if he and his twin giggle at an idea for more than fifteen seconds, they may assume that it’s against the rules and therefore should not carry it out. George Weasley … knows he and his twin will carry it out and are not remotely sorry. Lily Evans … swears she is not in love with James Potter. James Potter … doesn’t believe her. Remus Lupin … would prefer less jokes about ‘his time of the month’. Sirius Black … killed by drapery. Andromeda Black … is going to marry a muggle – screw the consequences. Bellatrix Black … is quietly going insane. Narcissa Black … would like a new hairbrush. Lucius Malfoy … does not like to be referred to as ‘Luscious Mouthful’. Voldemort … does not think it would be funny if HP were to put on earmuffs and pulled out a mandrake in his presence. Gryffindors … will jump off a cliff. Slytherins … will push someone else off. Hufflepuffs… will call five hundred others and build a staircase. Ravenclaws … will get hold of a flying carpet. Ways to Annoy a Non-Harry Potter Fan! 1. Relate everything they say to the Harry Potter books and/or movies. 2. Say they look like a Harry Potter character of the opposite gender. 3. Quote Dobby. 4. Hog the computer 24/7 while logged onto MuggleNet. 5. Read out loud to them whenever they can't get away from you (Example: When in a car or an elevator). If you don't have a book with you, recite from memory. 6. Give them Harry Potter merchandise for their birthday and Christmas and demand that they keep it and treasure it forever. 7. Rewrite their favorite song with Harry Potter lyrics and sing it constantly. 8. Crowd their inbox with Harry Potter related e-mail and make sure the subjects are misleading. 9. Start singing a Sorting Hat song at random moments, pretend to forget what comes next, and ask if they know in a very loud voice. 10. Make them play Quidditch with you. 11. Give all of their friends Harry Potter related nicknames and act mortally offended when they don't know the history of their character. 12. Change your name to that of a Harry Potter character and start screaming when they don't address you as such in public. 13. Always speak with a British accent - especially if you aren't from the UK. 14. Refer to real places by Harry Potter names. 15. ...throw a fit if others don't use these names. 16. Draw round glasses and lightning bolt scars on every poster and picture you come across...in permanent marker. 17. Give long lectures about how the prophecy relates to every day life. 18. Give every room in your house a Harry Potter codename. ( Example: The living room becomes the Entrance Hall) and whenever someone asks you where something is, use these names. 19. Change them immediately if they figure out what the names refer to. 20. Constantly ask if they can see the thestrals too. 21. ...refuse to explain what a thestral is. 22. Say, "Anything off the trolley, dear?" in a fake British accent when offering anyone food. 23. Pretend you can do magic. 24. Constantly rearrange their furniture and blame it on indecisive house-elves. 25. Yell "Get away from me, Death Eater!" whenever they get near you. 26. Constantly compare them to Mrs. Figg. 27. ...laugh evilly if they ask who Mrs. Figg is. 28. Complain loudly about how your pictures don't move. 29. Whenever you're asked for advice, reply with "Three turns should do it" in a very serious voice. 30. Break any awkward silences by saying, "How 'bout them Chudley Cannons?" 31. Tell a very long joke using a random Harry Potter quote as the punchline and then laugh hysterically. 32. ...make sure the joke isn't funny. 33. Use the titles "You-Know-Who" and "He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named" to refer to random people. 34. ... make sure no one knows who you're talking about. 35. Write letters to people (friends, neighbors...politicians) and ask them to join S.P.E.W. 36. ...hand fliers advertising it to a random passerby. 37. Report Dumbledore's death to your local authorities. 38. Call them repeatedly asking if Percy Weasley is there and hang up before they can reply. 39. Pop up in place you're not supposed to be and insist that you were only trying to Apparate. 40. If you're late for something, blame it on your broken Time Turner. 41. Deck yourself out in all of your Harry Potter gear when you know you'll be going to a public place. 42. Walk past a wall over and over again, stopping randomly to bang on. When you receive weird stares, shout, "What?! I'm look for the Room of Requirement!" 43. Every time you see them, demand an explanation of why exactly they don't like Harry Potter. 44. If anyone tells you you'll go to hell for reading Harry Potter, either: a) jump and down and tell them that you can't wait; b) tell them you'll meet them there; c) sing "Weasley Is Our King" over and over again; or d) ask them to back up this claim with evidence, and laugh at them when they can't. 45. Play the soundtracks while they're stuck in your car. 46. ...add commentary. ( Oh, this is where they...) 47. When one of the movies is on TV, call to remind them. 48. ...every five minutes. 49. If they ask for your phone number, tell them it's 6-2-4-4-2. 50. Say "Alohomora!" everytime you open a door. 51. Sort every person you meet into one of the four Houses. 52. Follow them around while acting out a scene from the book doing very annoying voices for all the characters. Expect them to join in, and act offended when they don't. 53. Count down to some obscure Harry Potter event, whether it's Dumbledore's birthday, or when a Harry Potter DVD comes out. Keep saying: "87 (86, 85, etc.) more days!" in the middle of every conversation you have with your friend. Smile in a superior way when they ask what you're counting down to. 54. Start talking about a deceased Harry Potter character and suddenly burst into hysterical tears. 55. Refuse to be comforted. 56. Ask them to help you study for your O.W.L's and N.E.W.T's. 57. Knit them hats and insist that you're just trying to liberate them. 58. Talk to animals and insist that they're Animagi. 59. Treat them to lunch and then suddenly realize you can't pay for the meal since the restaurant doesn't accept Galleons, Sickles, or Knuts. 60. Run up to random men with long, dark hair and scream, "SIRIUS! I always knew you were alive!" 61. Point at modern electronic devices and loudly say, "Look at that! The things these Muggles come up with..." 62. Write letters to the editor of your local newspaper about the evils of our society ( Namely, Death Eaters and discrimination against friendly werewolves). 63. Send them numerous letters informing them that they have been selected to attend Hogwarts. 64. Carry around a shiny rock and proclaim that you possess the Sorcerer's Stone. 65. Say everything in a sing-song voice like Luna Lovegood. 66. End every converastion and/or letter with "Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!" 67. ...refuse to provide an explanation. 68. Tap all brick walls you encounter with an umbrella. 69. Say "Lumos" when turning on a light. 70. Point and grunt and insist that you're speaking Troll. 71. Refuse to wash your hair and explain that you're going for the Snape look. 72. Spend hours at a time trying to get your broom to fly. 73. Invite them over for the night and force them to watch the first three movies with you. 74. If they leave for any reason, restart the movie and tell them it's the Time Turner scene. 75. Shriek loudly and insist that you're speaking Mermish. 76. If you're asked to retrieve something, shout "Accio!" loudly. 77. ...when this doesn't work, throw a fit. 78. Demand to know what exactly the function of a rubber duck is. 79. Talk like Hagrid. 80. Point to garden gnomes and say, "Silly Muggles don't have a clue about what gnomes look like!" in a very loud voice. 81. Take them to a CD store and make them help you look for the newest Weird Sisters album. 82. Yell "Avada Kedavra" anytime they give the anti-HP lecture, then fake excruciating pain as your soul rips in two. 83. Write "Enemies of the Heir, BEWARE!" in red paint on their wall. 84. When confronted about the message, refuse to take responsibility and/or explain it further. 85. Hum Hedwig's Theme constantly and be sure to include any crescendos, decrescendos, accents, etc. 86. Petition to have Hedwig's Theme become the new National Anthem. 87. Wear all black and explain that you're in mourning over the death of "The Only One He Ever Feared." 88. ...when asked for am explanation of this cryptic title, cry hysterically. 89. Replace their entire movie collection with the Harry Potter films. 90. If they ask you about the weather, solemnly say, "Mars is bright tonight." 91. Print this out and use it as a checklist. 92. Insist that they subscribe for your new Harry Potter newsletter and when they say no, act like you've been seriously offended. 93. Potter Puppet Pals, anyone? 94. Knit them a maroon jumper every year - especially if maroon isn't their color. 95. When taking the stairs with them, stop and insist that you have to wait because the staircases are moving. 96. If someone turns off the lights, make a loud cracking sound and pretend to Apparate to the other side of the room. 97. Carry around a hip flask and refuse to drink anything anyone offers you. 98. Toss a small handful of sand and yell out, "Diagon Alley!" 99. If you go to a train station with them, loudly ask random people if they know where you can find Platform 9 3/4. Do this in an extremely fake British accent. 100. When your friend is checking sports scores, ask them if they can find out the score of the latest Quidditch match. 101. If they refuse, complain (loudly) that you missed the semi-final match between the Chudley Cannons and the Wimbourne Wasps and you need to know who will be advancing to the finals against the Tutshill Tornadoes. 102. At your next sleepover, draw a lightning-bolt scar on your forehead, and just as your friend is drifting off to sleep, grab your forehead and start screaming that you dreamed Voldemort killed your parents. 103. Fill a bowl with water and tie some tinsel to the end of your wand. Move the wand-tip from your temple to the bowl and pretend you're transferring your thoughts to a Pensieve, and ask not to be disturbed. 104. When at a train station with them, repeatedly throw yourself against the wall between Platforms 9 and 10. If someone asks if you need help, state in a panicked voice that you're going to miss the Hogwarts Express, and do they have a flying car that you could borrow? 105.At random moments, pick up a wand like object and run around a room, screaming deadly curses and disturbing jinxes. Then collapse, act faint and say that you must be immediately to St. Mungos for you had been placed under the Imperius curse. When not taken, repeat the process. 106. While playing chess with them, stare at your pieces and give them verbal commands. 107. Throw the chessboard across the room when the pieces don't move. 108. Invite them to play "find the Horcrux" with you. 109. Tell them you're wearing an invisibility cloak, then hide. 110. Say "Knock knock." When the person says "Who's there?", say "You Know." When they say "You Know Who?", roll on the floor laughing. When they say they don't get it, become very offended and refuse to explain. 111. Wear mismatched clothes and if someone asks you why say it's because you can never keep up with the muggle fashions. 112. Send out birthday party invitations for a Harry Potter character. Be sure to call everyone who doesn't respond and ask them if they're coming. 113. On the first day of school, ask all of your teachers if "Hogwarts, a History" will be required reading. 114. In casual conversation, mention things you've been taught by Professor Flitwick. 115. Call your local station or cable provider and ask if they will be carrying the Chuddly Cannon games this season. 116. Write all letters to said person on parchment with quills. 117. Whenever they read the newspaper in public, complain loudly about how Scrimegeour is paying them to keep the big stories quiet. 118. Drag them along to the nearest place that has old brick buildings, pull out your pink umbrella, and start tapping the bricks - explain that you're looking for Diagon Alley. 119. Whenever it's foggy outside, scream "The Dementors are coming!" and hide for days at a time. 120. Fill a bowl with water and tie some tinsel to the end of your wand. Move the wand-tip from your temple to the bowl and pretend you're transferring your thoughts to a Pensieve, and ask not to be disturbed. 121. Insist the radio is called a Wizarding Wireless Network. 122. When travelling long distances, insist on going by Floo Powder - while grabbing a handful of soil from the nearest flowerpot. 123. Tell them that they're almost as smart as Grawp. 124. ..refuse to tell them who Grawp is. 125. Speak in a loud harsh voice at random moments and make predictions about people. Then, use your normal voice again and pretend that you don't remember anything. 126. Constantly remind them that you're Dumbledore's man/woman through and through. 127. Walk up to random people and ask them if their initials are R.A.B. 128. If they say no, give them a dirty mistrusting look. 129. If they say yes, then tackle them and demand that they hand over the Horcrux. 130. Yell "Crucio" at drivers who cut you off. 131. Call them every night and ask what the Transfiguration homework A good friend will comfort you when he rejects you. A best friend will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?" REASONS TO JOIN THE DARK SIDE (If you wish to join add this list to your profile): 1. We have cookies (last I checked there was hot chocolate too) 2. Meet the recruitment bunny! 3. You get a cool dark cape that covers your whole body! 4. You get a really cool crazy laugh! Practice with me, people: MWA HAHAHAHA cough cough! 5. You get to walk out of shadows mysteriously and freak out the good guys! 6. One word: UNDERLINGS! Someone to get things for you when you're too lazy to do them yourself... Now that's the life! 7. Money, Money, Money : Ever notice that we are usually much richer than the good guys? 8. WORLD DOMINATION! BEST reason! Best sayings and quotes from Harry Potter books and films! “It takes much bravery to stand up to our enemies but we need as much bravery to stand up to our friends.” - Professor Dumbledore to Neville Longbottom and the school at the end of year feast, Harry Potter and the Philosophers Stone “We've all got both light and dark inside us. What matters is the part we choose to act on. That's who we really are.” - Sirius Black to Harry Potter at Christmas in Grimmuald Place Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix “It matters not what someone is born, but what they grow to be.” - Professor Dumbledore to Harry Potter and Sirius Black after the third task, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire “Do you remember me telling you we are practicing non-verbal spells, Potter?" “You're a prefect? Oh Ronnie! That's everyone in the family!" "Death is but the next great adventure" - Professor Dumbledore said to Harry Potter in the Hospital wing, Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone “Not my daughter, you bitch!” - Molly Weasley to Bellatrix Lestrange at the Battle of Hogwarts, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows “You know, Minister, I disagree with Dumbledore on many counts...but you cannot deny he's got style...” - Kingsley Shacklebolt to Cornelius Fudge in the Headmasters office after he left, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix “There was a clatter as the basilisk fangs cascaded out of Hermione's arms. Running at Ron, she flung them around his neck and kissed him full on the mouth. Ron threw away the fangs and broomstick he was holding and responded with such enthusiasm that he lifted Hermione off her feet. “Give her hell from us, Peeves.”- Fred Weasley to Peeves as they left the castle, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix “Fear of the Name increases fear of the thing its self.” - Professor Dumbledore to Harry Potter in the hospital wing, Harry Potter and the Philosophers Stone "I'm going to bed before either of you come up with any more clever idea's to get us killed - or worse expelled!" Hermione said slamming the door to her dormitory. "Help will always be given at Hogwarts to those who deserve it" - Professor Dumbledore to Harry Potter in Kings Cross Station, Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows. "There is no right or wrong, there is only power and the will to use it" (Harry Potter and the Philosopher's stone) Percy Jackson Quotes: "Thalia was great at giving evil looks, what with the punk clothes she always wears—the ripped-up army jacket, black leather pants and chain jewelry, the black eye-liner and those intense blue eyes. But the look she gave me now was a perfect evil "ten."" - Percy Jackson. The Titan's Curse Jumping out a window five hundred feet above ground is not usually my idea of fun. Especially when I'm wearing bronze wings and flapping my arms like a duck. Thought's of Percy Jackson. The Battle of the Labyrinth I nodded, looking at Rachel with respect. "You hit the Lord of the Titans in the eye with a blue plastic hairbrush." Percy Jackson. The Battle of the Labyrinth Hades raised an eyebrow. When he sat forward in his throne, shadowy faces appeared in the folds of his black robes, faces of torment,as if the garment was stitched of trapped souls from the Fields of Punishment, trying to get out. The ADHD part of me wondered, off-task, whether the rest of his clothes were made the same way. What horrible things would you have to do in your life to get woven into Hades' underwear? Thought's of Percy Jackson. The Lightning Thief "Wow," Thalia muttered. "Apollo is hot." "He's the sun god," I said. "That's not what I meant." Thalia Grace & Percy Jackson. The Titan's Curse "Families are messy. Immortal families are eternally messy. Sometimes the best we can do is to remind each other that we're related for better or for worse...and try to keep the maiming and killing to a minimum." God Hermes. The Sea of Monsters Rachel: You're a half-blood, too? Annabeth: Shhh! Just announce it to the world, how about? Rachel: Okay. Hey, everybody! These two aren't human! They're half Greek god!...They don't seem to care. Annabeth Chase & Rachel Elizabeth Dare. The Battle of the Labyrinth The cafe windows wrapped all the way around the observation floor, which gave us a beautiful panoramic view of the skeleton army that had come to kill us. Thought's of Percy Jackson. The Titan's Curse "How did you die?" "We er...drowned in a bathtub." "All three of you?" "It was a big bathtub." Charon, Grover Underwood, & Percy Jackson. The Lightning Thief She'd also called me brave...unless she was talking to the catfish. Thought's of Percy Jackson. The Lightning Thief "Don't feel bad, I'm usually about to die." Percy Jackson. The Battle of the Labyrinth "My dear young cousin, if there's one thing I've learned over the eons, it's that you can't give up on your family, no matter how tempting they make it." God Hephaestus. The Battle of the Labyrinth "Where's the glory in repeating what others have done?" Percy Jackson. The Lightning Thief Rachel: They asked me a lot of questions about you. I played dumb. Annabeth: Was it hard? Rachel Elizabeth Dare & Annabeth Chase. The Battle of the Labyrinth "God alert!" Blackjack yelled. "It's the wine dude! Mr. D sighed in exasperation. "The next person - or horse - who calls me the 'wine dude' will end up in a bottle of Merlot Blackjack & God Dionysus. The Titan's Curse "So, you wrecked Alcatraz Island, made Mount St. Helens explode, and displaced half a million people, but at least you're safe." "Yep, that pretty much covers it." Sally Jackson & Percy Jackson. The Battle of the Labyrinth With great power... comes great need to take a nap. Wake me up later. “Dreams like a podcast, “I nodded, looking at Rachel with respect. "You hit the Lord of the Titans in the eye with a blue plastic hairbrush.” “Hey, can I see that sword you were using?" “God alert!" Blackjack yelled. "It's the wine dude! “Afterward, I had the last laugh. I made an air bubble at the bottom of the lake. Our friends kept waiting for us to come up, but hey-when you are the son of Poseidon, you don't have to hurry. And it was pretty much the best underwater kiss of all time.” “Why can't you place a blessing like that on us?" I asked. “Monkey bars," Annabeth said. "I'm great at these." She leaped onto to the first rung and start swinging her way across. She was scared of tiny spiders, but not of plummeting to her death from a set of monkey bars. Go figure.” “Now, come over here so I can pat you down." “Remind me again-why do you hate me so much?" “Very slowly using two fingers, Annabeth drew her dagger. Instead of dropping it, she tossed it as far as she could into the water. “You weren't able to talk sense into him?" “The Council agrees," Zeus said. "Percy Jackson, you will have one gift from the gods." “I'd love to tell you I had some deep revelation on my way down, that I came to terms with my own mortality, laughed in the face of death, et cetera. “As for my brothers," Zeus said, "we are thankful"-he cleared his throat like the words were hard to get out-"erm, thankful for the aid of Hades." “Can’t this thing go any faster?” Thalia demanded. “It doesn't matter if they hate you, or embarrass you, or simply don't appreciate your genius for inventing the internet-" “You speak horse?" Hazel asked. “They all ordered massive plates of eggs, pancakes, and reindeer sausage, though Frank looked a little worried about the reindeer. "You think it's okay that we're eating Rudolph?" “Since Percy’d lost his memory,his whole life was one big fillin-the-blank. He was, from_. He felt like “Part of their problem was Percy. He fought like a demon, whirling through the defender's ranks in a completely unorthodox style, rolling under their feet, slashing with his sword instead of stabbing like a Roman would, whacking campers with the flat of his blade, and generally causing mass panic.” “The older lady harrumphed. "I warned you, daughter. This scoundrel Hades is no good. You could've married the god of doctors or the god of lawyers, but noooo. You had to eat the pomegranate." “Boys are usually forbidden to have any contact with the Hunters. The last one to see this camp…” She looked at Zoe. “Which one was it?” “Meat!" he said scornfully. "I'm a vegetarian." “Christmas in the Underworld was NOT my idea. “Mr. D, wearing his leopard-skin jogging suit and rummaging through the refrigerator. “Right," she said, "We're going to the Land of the Dead and I shouldn't think negative.” The Hunger Games Never ignore a person who loves and cares for you. One day you may realize you’ve lost the moon while counting the stars. That what I need to survive is not Gale's fire, kindled with rage and hatred. I have plenty of fire myself. What I need is the dandelion in the spring. The bright yellow flower that means rebirth instead of destruction. The promise that life can go on, no matter how bad our losses. That it can be good again. And only Peeta can give me that. So after, when he whispers, "You love me. Real or not real?" I tell him, "Real." Katniss Everdeen, The Mockingjay. Page 388 Caesar: “Handsome lad like you. There must be some special girl. Come on, what’s her name?” Peeta: “Well, there is this one girl. I’ve had a crush on her ever since I can remember. But I’m pretty sure she didn’t know I was alive until the reaping.” Caesar: “She have another fellow?” Peeta: “I don’t know, but a lot of boys like her.” Caesar: “So, here’s what you do. You win, you go home. She can’t turn you down then, eh?” Peeta: “I don’t think it’s going to work out. Winning…won’t help in my case” Caesar: “Why ever not?” Peeta: “Because…because…she came here with me.” YOUR GUY SIDE: You love hoodies. You go to your dad for advice. Total: 21 (... I'm a girl... with 21 things that a guy would do...) YOUR GIRL SIDE: You wear lip gloss/stick. Total: 4 (... Weird, I'm a girl... with 4 girl traits...? Wow...) If you cried during/after reading Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, copy this to your profile If you loved DH, HBP, OotP, GoF, PoA, CoS, and SS/PS, and know what all those initials stand for, copy and paste this into your profile. If you cried when Fred Weasley died (in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows), and not afraid to admit it, copy, paste this on your profile. If you cried when Dobby died (in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows), copy and paste this into your profile If you love Harry Potter, copy this into your profile. If you always mentally make the Sirius "serious" pun whenever somebody says, "I'm serious!" copy and paste this into your profile. If you read Deathly Hallows in under a week, copy and paste this (Try 10 hours!) If you think Remus Lupin deserves more cuddles than Jacob Black, copy this to your profile. If you wanted to punch Remus Lupin in the gut for thinking that he was "too old" for Tonks, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you agree that Tonks is a way better nickname than Dora (as in Nymphadora), copy and paste this onto your profile. If you agree Pansy Parkinson should be sent to a Dog Kennel, copy and paste this to your profile Have you ever wondered: Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin... Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed? Why don't you ever see the headline 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Why is 'abbreviated' such a long word? Why is it that doctors call what they do 'practice'? Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dish-washing liquid made with real lemons? Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour? Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food? Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes? Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections? You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?! Why don't sheep shrink when it rains? Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together? If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress? If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal? If you know the lines to all Narnia movies, copy and paste this. This One's For The Girls If someone insults you say 'How sweet thanks for noticing' and walk away If someone says you'll die old and alone say 'No I won't I'll have my cats' If your not as pretty as the most popular girl in school her beauty is only skin deep your's is on the inside that's where it counts If you'd rather read then party GREAT If you like to jump in rain puddles and don't care about your clothes your not alone If your a geek scream it from the roof tops If your a nerd be proud of your brain and if your a geek... well you get the point wowlookatthisimtypingthisveryoddlinebreakifyoucanreaditcopyandpasteyousmartperson If you don't use myspace and are proud of it, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you think it's stupid that some girls are automatically labeled with the color pink, copy and paste this into your profile. If you are NOT addicted to Twilight, copy and paste this into your profile. If you're annoyed with snobby people, then copy and paste this into your profile. Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile. If you are obsessed with Fanfiction, put this into your profile. If you have seen a movie so many times that you have memorized almost all of the lines, and you STILL laugh at EVERY punch line, copy this onto your profile. If you're a female gamer, copy and paste this to your profile. If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word. And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in your profile. If you wish that a fictional character was real, copy and paste this to your profile. If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile. If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile. if you've ever tripped where there is a WATCH YOUR STEP SIGN copy this into your pro if you've ever walked into a wall b4 copy this into your pro if you ever fell off a chair backwards copy this into your pro If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE! Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique,so weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile! If you want to kill the person who said Avatar was a load of rubbish, copy and paste this into your profile! If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile. If your a CHOC AHOLIC -TALK AHOLIC -OR A-SHOP AHOLIC If you think Harry Potter can do MUCH BETTER than Ginny, (as in Draco Malfoy preferably, or, hell, anyone else copy and paste this to your profile. If you hear the voices of your characters in your head, please copy this into your profile. Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. Copy in paste this into your profile if you'd be one of the few that would answer, "where to begin" 92 percent of American teens would die if Abercombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy and paste this into your profile if you would be in the 8 percent that would be laughing your asses off. If you have embarassing memories that make you want to just smack yourself copy this into your profile If you believe in magic, copy and paste this into your profile If you believe in werewolf rights copy and paste this onto your profile. WOOOO! GO REMUS! If when you hear the word werewolf, you think of Remus Lupin, NOT Jacob Black, copy and paste this into your profile. In Remembrance: In Remembrance to Severus Snape, A Slytherin who died like a Gryffindor, for his Lily may he have been forgiven in the end, In Remembrance to Fred Weasley, Who fought bravely to the very end, And whose jokes will forever brighten his other half, And will loyally await his soul mate and brother, With many jokes, He's got forever to think of them, right? In Remembrance to Dobby, Who was more free and full of love, Than any elf, and most humans; a truely free elf may he rest in peace! In Remembrance to Remus J. Lupin, The last real Marauder, Who was not just a wonderful father, An incredible husband and a brave hero, But an awesome warewolf too, In Remembrance to Nymphadora Tonks, Who died for the greater good, leaving behind the second mauraders son, And would probably hex me for calling her Nymphadora, In Remembrance to Alastair 'Mad Eye' Moody, Who's motto 'Constance Vigilance' kept him alive, In Remembrance to Tom Marvolo Riddle, A.K.A Voldemort, Who was pretty cool and cute when he was younger, But who got his ass kicked thoroughly in the end, In Remembrance to Bellatrix Lestrange, Because it was awesome how Molly Weasley got her with the Avada Kedavra, She deserved everything she got in the end, In Remembrance to Colin Creevey, Who we really didn't know too well, But took a lot of pictures and died fighting in the war, So he must've done something good... Besides stalking Harry, In Remembrance to Hedwig, Harry's first real friend, Who lived and died soaring in the night sky. 95% of girls would scream if Justin Bieber went missing: Paste this on your profile if you are one of 5% who would smile and poke your new prisoner with a stick! Edward:"Bella!" Bella: "Edward!" Me: "Oh shut up!!!!" Copy and paste this into you profile if you think Twilight is dum 92% of teenagers would cry if Edward Cullen was going to jump of a building, copy and paste this into you profile if your one of the 8% that would shout "Jump Jump JUMP!!!!" 95% of teens would cry if they saw Justin Bieber at the top of a skyscraper about to jump. Copy and paste this into your profile if you are part of the 5% that would sit there with popcorn and a video camera and yell "DO A FLIP!" ZEUS You like being in charge. You often wish you could just zap someone with a thunderbolt. You were voted Class President. You try to do what’s best for everyone. You have multiple exes. You think you have what it takes to run for President. You think every problem has a solution. You love showing off. You like plane rides. You are hydrophobic. 3/10 POSEIDON You feel at home in the water. Your favorite vacation place is at the beach. You enjoy snorkeling, scuba diving, surfing, etc. You want to do something about the marine species being abused today. You visit the local pool on a regular basis. You swim professionally. You hate seafood. You never get seasick. You’d rather ride a boat than a plane. You are acrophobic. 1/10 HADES You’re not that much of a people person. You like staying in the dark and writing poems. You experience bad moods on a regular basis. You like listening to loud, angry music. you spend of your time alone. You think parties are sometimes loud and annoying. You like to keep to yourself. (Sometimes...) All your closets are padlocked. You write in a diary/journal. You feel most active at night. 9/10 DEMETER You own a garden. You like the great outdoors. You have a green thumb. You’re an environmentalist. You have a special connection with animals. You’re a vegetarian. You like going hiking, camping, and looking at the natural wonders of the world. You always check a product if it’s environmentally-friendly. You love going to flower shops. You think global warming is a threat that must be dealt with. 2/10 ARES You often start fights. You’re a very aggressive type of person. You like watching wrestling. You’re competitive. You like reading about war. You don’t take crap from anybody. You have anger management. You never back away from a fight. Everyone does what you say. You don't always think before you do something. (I think sometimes) 0/10 ATHENA You have an insatiable thigh knowledge. You’re probably the only person who visits the library on a regular basis. Half of your Christmas presents last year were books. You like reading about war, mostly about the reasons and controversies behind it. You’re the valedictorian in your class. (I wish...) You’ve never gotten a grade below 90 in your report card. You get political jokes without asking people to explain them. You think it would be better if you were the President. (as well as my friends) You have a huge shelf of books at home. You think vinyl pocket protectors are useful. 3/10 APOLLO You’re very creative and artistic. You like listening to all kinds of music in general. You always feel sunny and optimistic. You are talented at drawing. You like writing poetry. You can play at least 3 musical instruments. You like going to art museums. You always win 1st Place in Art Contests. You have straight As in Art on your report card. Your school notebook has more doodles than notes 6/10 HUNTER OF ARTEMIS You dislike boys in general. A deer is one of your favourite animals. You can shoot targets. You like silver. You like the moon better than the sun. Zoe Nightshade is awesome. You love wild animals. You spend most of your time outdoors. You love to move around the place. 10/10 Hephaestus You have a way with tools. You build awesome things during your free time. You’re the best at Wood shop in your class. Metalworking is your forte. You have your own toolbox. You often search the Internet to look for pictures of robots. You’re a techie. You often have carpentry projects. You dream of being a carpenter. You aren’t afraid of fire. 0/10 APHRODITE Every guy/girl swoons for you. You like putting on makeup. You naturally smell good. You never experience a bad hair day. Your favorite activity is clothes-shopping. You’re always at the front of every trend. You’re the popular girl/guy at your school. You’re often invited to parties. Your motto is "It’s never a party without me.” You look at yourself in the mirror on a regular basis. 0/10 HERMES You like pick pocketing your friends. You’re a prankster. You’re a speed demon. You consider yourself restless. You’re the best speaker in the class. You like thinking on your feet and using your wits. You’re inventive and resourceful. You often start arguments. You’ve never lost a debate. You like making witty and sarcastic statements. (And annoying people) 1/10 DIONYSUS You’re the life of the party. You like wine. You’ve probably tasted every alcoholic drink out there. (nope) You can finish a martini in less than a minute. (What is that?!) You have a happy, cheerful disposition. You’re a foodie. You like going to social events and mingling with people. You like trying out new food. You feel that you’re abundant in life. You think that blah blah blah... 1/10 HECATE Being called 'crazy' is a compliment. You like magic. You like Harry Potter. You're bold. You hate when people think you're the bad guy. You dress dark, but your personality is cheerful and happy. You couldn't care less about fashion. Teddy bears are lethal in your hands. You like being different from everybody else. You can spend hours a day debating something ridiculous. 7/10 So... I am a Hunter of Artemis and also a daughter of Hades... So pretty much like Bianca... Annabeth : It's hard to believe you can teleport using a stick. Hermione : This isn't a stick. It's a wand. You're the one to say. A cap that makes you disappear? Annabeth : It's simple physics. Now tell me what is the science on the splitting of souls. Hermione : Only after you explain to me the lack of DNA in all of you guys. Annabeth : After you explain how to make things float with words and a wand. Hermione : After you explain how a watch can become a giant shield. Annabeth : ... Hermione : ... Annabeth : Umm... Hermione : At least our boyfriends don't sparkle. Annabeth : Right! Bella : HEY! YOUR REAL NAME: Shannon YOUR GANGSTA NAME:(first 3 letters of real name plus izzle): Shaizzle YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (fav color and fav animal): Silver Puppy YOUR SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd favorite color, favorite drink) Gold Coke YOUR GOTH NAME: (black, and the name of one of your pets): Black Midnight (or just Midnight) YOUR HIPPIE NAME: (type your name with your elbow): agvbhy szawnmj hnhmj on mj YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (Middle name and current street name): Page Reginald YOUR STAR WARS NAME (The first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name, last 3 letters of your mom's maiden name): Keashage YOUR ARAB NAME: (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, any letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your moms maiden name, 3rd letter of your dads middle name, 1st letter of your siblings first name, last letter of your moms middle name): Hapaeke YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother's middle name): Page Okay I did this a while ago so I will do it again, 21/01/2018 1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 81, and find line 4. 2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can, What can you touch? Nothing - I cant even touch the wall or floor. A couch pillow 3.What is the last thing you watched on TV? Jessie NCIS Los Angeles 4. Without looking, guess what time it is: 15:40 ish 20:00, I know because MacGyver is starting 5. Now look at the clock. What is the actual time? 15:38 - not bad 20:00 - like I said 6. With the exception of the computer, what can you hear? My dad and brother playing a card game. TV - MacGyver Season 2 Episode 3 7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing? Eating cookie dough ice cream and doing homework Yesterday, went to my Nan's. 8. Before you started this survey, what did you look at? Fanfiction Time Lord Names - making a fanfiction of Doctor who 9. What are you wearing? PJ's Ditto 10. Did you dream last night? No idea... Ditto 11. When did you last laugh Yesterday Tpday 12.What is on the walls of the room you are in? Teddy's Peach 13. Seen anything weird lately? A lot My cat for one, my cousins for another 14. What do you think of this quiz? Something I shouldn't be doing as I have homework It's fun 15. What is the last film you saw? Narnia Fully - no idea, last time - Lord of the Rings 17. Tell me something about you that I don't know: Tell me what you do know and I will tell you you know nothing 18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do? Everything The Government 19. Do you like to dance? Yep Eh 20. George Bush: I might hate this survey 21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her? Alexandra 22. Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him? Jamie You say vampires, I say DEMIGODS! You say Rob Pattinson, I say LOGAN LERMAN! You say Bella and Edward, I say PERCY AND ANNABETH You say Team Edward, I say TEAM PERCY! You say Bella, I say ANNABETH! You say Jacob, I say NICO! You say Jasper, I say LUKE! You say Alice, I say THALIA! You say Rosalie, I say SILENA! You say the wolf pack, I say THE STOLLS! You say Emmett, I say BECKENDORF! You say Carlisle, I say CHIRON! You say Esme, I say ZOE! You say Forks, I say CAMP HALF-BLOOD! You say Twilight, I say...PERCY JACKSON AND THE OLYMPIANS BABY!!!!!!! BEAT THAT TWILIGHT FANS! I am the girl...that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird, and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cellphone or regular phone. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. I am the girl that loves rain and storms more than a sunny day, and not because she can't go out, but because she does go out. I am the girl that prefers novels to manga. I am the girl that doesn't try to hide her inner child. I'm some one people like to talk to. I'm not popular nor unpopular. I have some friends. Reading is what i do best. It is my passion. When i come home i read, during school i read and walking down the street i read.When i read a book i am caught up on it for a long period of time. I have to read it again. I wish am in the book. I'm different and I like it. I like who i am and don't judge myself to harshly. I am the kind of girl who doesnt need a guy to complete her. I am the kind of girl who talks to herself when there is no one else to talk to. I am the kind of girl who would rather read than do athletics. I am that girl, The one who likes book more than boys. The one who pretends not to be sad, just to make others happy The one who to reads escape The one who just wants to help The one that really wants to make a difference The one that sticks to her values The one that refuses to believe that this is it The one that will do anything to make a better tomorrow The one who won't give in The one won't give up I pledge myself to the goddess Artemis I turn my back on the company of men Accept eternal maidenhood And join the hunt. If you're a girl and get sick and tired of guys assuming that you're weak and can’t fight, copy and paste this into your profile. Pick the month you were born: Pick the day (number) you were born on: Pick the color of shirt you are wearing: I had lunch with a banana because I'm crazy. The Percy Jackson pledge: Make Anything Bold That You Have Done. Had beer Sayings I'm not paranoid...WHICH OF MY ENEMIES TOLD YOU THIS?!?! Flying is simple. Just throw yourself at the ground and miss. Don't knock on deaths door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that. Trying is the first step to failure. When life gives you lemons, make apple juice, then sit back and let the rest of the world wonder how you did it. This isn't just goodbye. This is I can't stand you. Stereotypes I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic. If you've had it with stereotypes post this on you're profile and bold the ones you are My OTP's HP Series: Harry/Ginny Hermione/Ron Lily/James Remus/Tonks Harry/Hermione FemHarry/Draco FemHarry/Tom FemHarry/Blaise FemHarry/Theo Teddy/Lily Luna OC/Bill OC/Draco OC/Blaise OC/Theo PJ/HOO Series: Percy/Annabeth Percy/Thalia Thalia/Nico Jason/Piper OC/Leo OC/Nico OC/Percy OC/Luke Luke/FemPercy Narnia: Susan/Caspian Susan/Peter Lucy/Caspian Lucy/Peter Lucy/Edmund Study Series: Yelena/Valek Mara/Leif Crossover HP&PJ/HOO: OC/Lee OC/Nico OC/Percy OC/Apollo OC/Hermes FemHarry/Percy FemHarry/Nico FemHarry/Draco FemHarry/Hermes FemHarry/Apollo Along with many others... Disney taught me to never stop believing in my dreams. Harry Potter taught me that love and friendship dominates all kind of evil. Narnia taught me that we must all grow up and leave our childhood behind, but must never forget it. Percy Jackson taught me that there's a hero in every one of us. 37 Things to do in an Elevator 1. Crack open your briefcase or handbag, peer inside and ask "Got enough air in there?" 2. Stand silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off. 3. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves. 4. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral. 5. Meow occasionally. 6. Stare at another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM!" - and back away slowly. 7. Say "DING!" at each floor. 8. Say "I wonder what all these do?" and push all the red buttons. 9. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button. 10. Stare grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on." 11. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?" 12. Try to make personal calls on the emergency phone. 13. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space." 14. When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you. 15. As you are coming to the end of the journey, get emotional and have a group hug. Tell them that you will never forget them. 16. Ask if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones. 17. Hold the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?" 18. Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!" 19. Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift. 20. Pretend you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers. 21. Swat at flies that don't exist. 22. Call out "Group hug!" then enforce it. 23. Make car race noises when someone gets on or off. 24. Congratulate all for being in the same lift with you. 25. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!" 26. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side. 27. While the doors are opening, hurriedly whisper, "Hide it...quick!" then whistle innocently. 28. Let your cell phone ring - don't answer it. 29. Walk into the lift and say "This reminds me of being buried alive. Ah, those were the days..." 30. Take shoes off before entering. Then look shocked and disgusted when the others don't. 31. Ask people which floor they want, then say in 'Who Wants to be a Millionaire?' style if that is "their final answer." 32. Also in your bellboy act, ask what floor they want. Whatever they say, give them a glare and say "you should be ashamed of yourself!", and leave the lift tutting. 33. Ask, "Did you feel that?" 34. Tell people that you can see their aura. 35. When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again." 36. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body." 37. Dress up in a long, black cloak with a hood, stare and in a deep voice announce "It is time..." Being mature is overrated. Being weird is like being normal, only better. I see regular people! I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me. I'm so gangster, I carry a squirt gun. Anyone can reach the stars. If you can't reach them, catch one that falls. Smile... it confuses people. Labels are for cans, and in case you haven't noticed, I'm not a can! Don't yawn in the shower. You might drown. -Bill Cosby The dinosaur's extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all committed suicide. There's a ME in AWESOME but there's also a WE. I was gifted but the psychiatrist took away my super powers. Slinky Escalator = Endless fun Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us how to walk and talk, then the rest of our lives telling us to sit down and shut up. Palm Reader: -gasp- "You're going to die. But don't worry, you'll live through it." Therapist = The/rapist (scary thought -shudder-) Excuse me. Have you seen my sanity? I think I've lost it... I used to care, but I take a pill for that now. I call you squishy and you shall be mine. You will be my squishy! -Dory from Finding Nemo I can resist anything but temptation. The best place to hide is in plain sight. You laugh now because you're older than me by mere months, but when you're 30 and I'm still 29, who will be laughing then? Keep smiling; it makes people wonder what you're up to. You laugh at me because I'm insane, I laugh cause you just figured it out. If your part of the .0000000001 percent of people who does NOT have a MySpace, copy and paste this into your profile. To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world. If you agree copy and paste this on your profile. I like you. When I rule the world, your death shall be quick and painless. If I asked for your opinion, I'd take the tape off your mouth. Secret admirers are stalkers with stationary. "Shut up voices or I'll poke you with a fork." Do I have to spell it out for you or scream it in your face?! So what if we act like immature idiots? We're having fun. Doctors say I have multiple personalities. We disagree with that. A wise man once said "I don't know go ask a woman" The Lightning Thief Prophecy: You shall go west and face the god who has turned. You shall find what was stolen and see it safely returned. You shall be betrayed by one who calls you a friend. And you shall fail to save what matters most, in the end. The Sea of Monsters Prophecy: You shall sail the iron ship with warriors of bone, You shall find what you seek and make it your own, But despair for your life entombed within stone, And fail without friends, to fly home alone. The Titan's Curse Prophecy: Five shall go west to the goddess in chains, One shall be lost in the land without rain, The bane of Olympus shows the trail, Campers and Hunters combined prevail, The titan's curse must one withstand, And one shall perish by a parent's hand The Battle of the Labyrinth Prophecy: You shall delve in the darkness of the endless maze, The dead, the traitor, the lost one shall rise. You shall rise or fall by the ghost king's hand, The child of Athena's final stand. Destroy with the hero's last breath, And lose a love to worse than death. THE GREAT PROPHECY: A half-blood of the eldest gods, Shall reach sixteen against all odds. And see the world in endless sleep, The hero's soul, cursed blade shall reap. A single choice shall end his days. Olympus to preserve or raze. THE NEXT GREAT PROPHECY: Seven half-bloods shall answer the call. To storm or fire, the world must fall. An oath to keep with a final breath, And foes bear arms to the Doors of Death The Harry Potter Pleadge: I promise to remember Harry When I need to be courageous. I promise to remember Ron When I feel overshadowed. I promise to remember Hermione When I am picked on for being smart. I promise to remember James and Lily When someone dies before their time. I promise to remember Dumbledore At the thought of greater good. I promise to remember “I solemnly swear that I am up to no good” For the Marauders, of course. I promise to remember Gred and Forge When I need a laugh. I promise to remember Moony And fight for human rights. I promise to remember Snape When asked the true meaning of love. I promise to remember Narcissa When I’d do anything for family. I promise to remember Tonks When I feel hyper and cheery. I promise to remember Hedwig Who lived and died soaring. I promise to remember Percy When ambition gets the best of me. I promise to practice constant vigilance For Moody’s sake, of course. I promise to remember Hagrid When someone sees beauty in what others see as ugly. I promise to remember Neville When I stand up for what is right. I promise to remember the Golden Trio as a whole When a friend says, “Call and I’ll be there.”. I promise to remember Ginny When I must face my fears. I promise to remember Dobby When asked the price of freedom. I promise to remember Luna When I dare to be kooky. I promise to remember Seamus When things go wrong but I still persevere. I promise to remember Draco When I make a bad choice and pay for it later. I promise to remember Oliver When I soar to great heights. I promise to remember the Dursleys When my parents still keep denying that they hid my Hogwarts acceptance letter. I promise to remember Gilderoy Lockhart Whenever I chance upon narcissistic people. I promise to remember J.K. Rowling When I value the power of imagination. Yes I promise that I will Remember Harry Potter. When you were 5, your mom gave you a ice cream cone. You thank her by yelling at her that it's the wrong kind. When you were 9, your mom drove you from swimming class to soccer and one birthday party to another. You thanked her by slamming the door and never looking back. When you were 10, your mom payed for piano classes. You thanked her by never coming to class. When you were 12, your mom was waiting for a very important call. You thanked her by talking on the phone all night. When you were 14, your mom payed for a month away at summer camp. You thanked her by not bothering to write a single letter. When you were 16, your mom taught you how to drive her car. You thanked her by taking it every chance you got. When you were 17, your mom drove you to the mall and gave you her credit card. You thanked her by maxing it out. When you were 18, your mom cried at your high school graduation. You thanked her by partying until dawn. When you were 20, your mom drove you to collage. You thanked her by saying good-bye to her outside the dorm so you wouldn't have to say bye in front of your friends. When you were 26, your mom payed for your wedding. You thanked her by moving halfway across the world. When you were 30, your mom fell ill and needed you to take care of her. You thanked her by reading about the burden parents became to children. Then, one day, she quietly died and everything you did came crashing down on you. If YOU love your mom, re-post this and if you don't, you won't care if your mom dies, will you? Love your mom as when she is gone, you will regret it, I was 5 when I lost my mom and now I am 16. PREP You own a cell phone. You own something from abercrombie. You own something from pacsun. You own something from Hollister. You own something from American Eagle. You love/like going to the mall. You own an iPod/MP3 player. You love Starbucks. You have been called a brat. You hate buying things that are on sale. You have more than one house. Total : 1 GOTHIC Black is one of your favorite colors. You have thought about death. You wear chains. You like heavy metal. You've shopped at Hot Topic You have worn black lipstick. Your hair was/is dark. You dislike preps. You're an atheist/satanist/agnostic. Total : 2 PUNK You can skateboard. You've worn plaid. You like Converse. You hate MTV. You have/had blue, pink, red, purple, or green hair. You dislike pink. You hate/dislike preps. You wear/wore skateboarding shoes. Total: 0 GEEK You love the computer. You like Harry Potter. You are supposed to wear glasses/contacts. You get straight A's. You love/like reading. You were/are in band. You were/are in Orchestra You don't care what you look like. You have a curfew. You always do your homework. You never miss school unless you're sick. Total: 7 EMO You cut yourself over depression. You have been depressed. You have black rimmed glasses. You like the band Evanescence. You cry easily. You like emo music. You hate being called emo. You keep/have kept a journal/diary. You have written a sad poem. You think emo chicks/Guys are hot. Total: 2 GHETTO/GANGSTA You like rap. You are/was in a gang. You wear/wore rubberbands in your pants. You swear once in a while or a lot. You have freestyled. You have worn high tops with the tongue flipped out. You can break dance Total: 0 HARDCORE/SCENE You like loud music. You love/loved the Ninja Turtles You never walk anywhere. You wear slip-on shoes. You wear/wore Vans. You like the band Panic! at the disco. You wear band t-shirts. People have called you a freak and meant it. You love to "hardcore" dance Your hair has been died more than 1 color Total: 6 ATHLETIC You watch/watched the Superbowl. You own track shoes or other sports related shoes. You collect your jerseys. You have a wall or shelf dedicated to your trophies / awards You have posters or plaques of famous athletes. Your garage consists of sports equipment. You belong/belonged to a school team. You go to a sports club. You have a specific number Total: 0 I AM GEEK AND PROUD OF IT! Take 3 minutes and try this ... BUT NO CHEATING! This game has a funny/spooky outcome. Don't read ahead ... just do it in order! It's worth a try. First ... get a pen and paper. When you actually choose names, make sure it's people you actually know and go with your first instinct. Scroll down one line at a time ... and don't read ahead or you'll ruin it! 1. First, write the numbers 1 through 11 in a column. 2. Then, beside numbers 1 and 2, write down any two numbers you want. 3. Beside the 3 and 7, write down the names of members of the opposite sex. 4. Write anyone's name (like friends or family ...) in the 4th, 5th, and 6th spots. 5. Write down four song titles in 8, 9, 10, and 11. (Go with your instincts!) 6. Finally, make a wish. And now the key for the game ... 1. You must tell (the number in space 2) people about this game. 2. The person in space 3 is the one that you love. 3. The person in 7 is one you like but can't work out. 4. You care most about the person you put in 4. 5. The person you name in number 5 is the one who knows you very well. 6. The person you name in 6 is your lucky star. 7. The song in 8 is the song that matches with the person in number 3. 8. The title in 9 is the song for the person in 7. 9. The tenth space is the song that tells you most about YOUR mind. 10. 11 is the song telling you how you feel about life NOW ... post this bulletin (don't reply) within the hour. IF you do, your wish will come true ... If you don't it will become the opposite ... PERCY JACKSON QUICK SURVEY: 1) Percabeth or Prachel? Percabeth 2) Favorite guy character? Nico 3) Favorite girl character? Zoe 4) Favorite god? Apollo 5) Favorite goddess? Hestia 6) Zeus, Poseidon, or Hades? Hades, easy. 7) Is Luke hot? Maybe... 8) Would you join the hunters? Yeah if I had the chance, I just don't care about boys really... 9) Archery or sword fighting? Archery 10) Iris Messaging or Hermes Express? Hermes Express, he's a great God. I mean, he and Hades do a lot of work and are greatly under-appreciated. 11) Favorite minor god/goddess? Hecate 12) Favorite book? Blood of Olympus 13) Least favorite? The Mark of Athena 14) Would you live year round at Camp Half-Blood or just go in the summer? Year round, I like the idea of not being in school and being American, but I would go for summer if I want. 15) Favorite couple? Leo/Calypso 16) Are you a demigod? Yeah! Wait, are you aloud to lie on this...? Then no I am not. 17) Who would be your parent? Child of Hades and Artemis and Hestia, well champions of those two. 18) Favorite minor character? Hmm, not sure... 19) Ethan or Luke? Ethan, he got the Minor Gods and Goddesses recognition. It was his wish. 20) Favorite monsters? Probably hellhounds Put this on your page 5 reasons you should NEVER give me sugar in public: 1) I'll run around wherever I can screaming "FOR NARNIA!!" 2) I'll find some random guy standing by a hole, kick him and say, "This is SPARTA!" 3) I'll run up to some random person say, "I like chicken, do you like chicken? BYE!" and run away. 4) I won't stop talking, even when you put duct tape over my mouth. 5) Whenever I see a lion statue or a lion (if we're at the zoo) I'll yell, "OMG ASLAN! Did you know that 8 out of 10 statistics are made up on the spot? If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile. Did you know the average American only reads 3 books a year? If you don't believe that it's even possible to read that little, copy and paste this onto your profile. If Fanfiction is your way of escaping reality and the rest of the boring people in the world and truly "unleashing your imagination" then paste this in your profile and add your name: Emerald Princess 14, StardustFromThePlanetGallifrey, obsessedchick15, LM2MM, LucianLoveNarnia, shazzygirl If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile. If you hear the voices of characters in your head, put this onto your profile. If you know the lines to all Narnia movies, copy and paste this. IF YOUR LIFE WERE A MOVIE, WHAT WOULD THE SOUNDTRACK BE? So, here's how it works: 1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc.) Opening Credits: On top of the world - Dove Cameron Waking Up: Everything can change - Spectacular First Day At School: We got the beat - Debby Ryan Making Your New Best Friend: A year without rain - Selena Gomez Falling In Love: Rock me - One Direction Breaking Up: Last forever - Mitchel Musso Prom: Something Real - How to build a better boy Graduation: We are young - Fun Life's Okay: Impossible - Shontelle Death of a Close Friend: Somebody to you - The Vamps ft Demi Lavato Mental Breakdown: Up up and away - Blush Driving: Who do you think you are? - S Club 7 Flashback: They don't know about us - One Direction Getting Back Together: She's so gone - Lemonade Mouth Wedding Scene: Hit the lights - Selena Gomez Birth of Child: Fearless - Olivia Holt Car Accident: Who says - Selena Gomez Final Battle: Something to believe in - Spectacular Death Scene: Forget about you - R5 End Credits: One thing - One Direction Hmmm... Weird movie songs... I have a one-time gift. A beautiful gift that many people are ridiculed for in this day and age. A precious gift that many people throw away. It's called "virginity", and I plan to not waste it on someone who's just gonna dump me later. I choose to be faithful to my future husband, the man who will love me for the rest of my life, and to wait for the wedding day!! If you have chosen to save your one-time gift and are PROUD of your purity, paste this into your profile and add your name to the list: Dearheart, floppyearsthebunny, Narniachick, Elizabeth Zara, Knees, LM2MM, LucianLoveNarnia, shazzygirl Take your time and see if you can read each line aloud without a mistake. The average person can't. this is this cat this is is cat this is how cat this is to cat this is keep cat this is a cat this is retard cat this is busy cat this is for cat this is forty cat this is seconds cat Now go back and read the THIRD word in each line from the top down and I bet you can't resist passing it on If you talk to yourself or fictional characters copy/paste this into your profile (I spend all my spare time hanging out with fictional characters) If you ever wondered who made up all the 'copy this into your profile' thingies then COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE! They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people. I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that stuff up in two seconds. That's why when I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, "Oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you" If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this onto your profile. If there are times where you just wanna annoy someone for the heck of it, copy this into your profile. If you have ever wanted to just SLAP someone, copy this into your profile. Aslan: Do not cite the deep magic to me, Witch. I was there when it was written. Susan: Why are they all staring at us? Peter: (to Oreius) Are you with me? Mr. Tumnus: Are you familiar with any Narnian lullabies? Older Lucy: What was it he said again, Susan? Aslan: To the glistening Eastern sea, I give you Queen Lucy, the Valiant. Aslan: Once a king or queen of Narnia, always a king or queen. May your wisdom grace us until the stars rain down from the heavens. Peter: I don't suppose saying "we're sorry" would quite cover it? Edmund: But that's a girl's coat! Aslan: It is finished. Mr. Tumnus: After all, he's not a tame lion. Lucy: They're so still. Reepicheep: Choose your last words carefully, Telmarine! Edmund: So you're bravely refusing to battle a swordsman half your age? Edmund: I know. You had it sorted. Lucy: Oh my gosh, he's so cute! Lucy: "You might need to call me again"?! Nikabrik: I knew we should have killed him while we had the chance!
Lucy: I was so tall! Lucy: I'm sure when I'm older I'll understand. Edmund: The last time I didn't believe Lucy, I ended up looking pretty stupid. Caspian: Minotaurs? They're real?
Lucy: Do you see him now? Pattertwig: We could collect nuts! Trumpkin: And you wonder why we don't like you. Aslan: Rise, kings and queens of Narnia. ((looks at Caspian)) All of you. Aslan: Things never happen the same way twice, dear one. Peter: You're lucky, you know. Miraz: This used to be a private room. Peter: So where did you think you saw Aslan? Aslan: In your world, I have another name. You must learn to know me by it. That is the very reason you were brought to Narnia. That by knowing me here for a little, you may know me better there. Edmund: There once was a boy called Eustace who read books full of facts that were useless. Reepicheep: Unhand the tail. The great Aslan himself gave me this tail. No one, repeat, no one touches the tail. Period, exclamation mark! Reepicheep: We have nothing, if not belief. Gael: When I grow up, I want to be just like you. Caspian: Now's the time to be strong. Never give in! Think of the lost souls we're here to save...think of Aslan.
Eustace: We spoke often of Narnia in the days that followed. And when my cousins left, after the war ended, I missed them with all my heart. Just as I know all Narnians will miss them, until the end of time. Ways to know you are obsessed with PJO: When its thundering, you wonder what Zeus is mad about. you read all of Demigod Files the night it came out. You have read the preview of the last olympian at least five times. You think you are a demigod when you get a sunburn, you blame Apollo you have actually sworn on the river Styx you have tried to explain greek mythology to small children. you have corrected your social studies teacher during a unit on ancient greece. you blame Hermes when your computer crashes you will never go to Canada because you don't want to be eaten by Laistrygonians. you say things like " oh my gods" You think you know who your olympian parent is. YOU KNOW YOU'RE OBSESSED WITH PERCY JACKSON AND THE OLYMPIANS WHEN: 1) You buy everything you see with an owl or trident on it. 2) You yell “Burrito Fight!” whenever you’re in a Mexican restaurant. 3) You checked to make sure your vice-principal doesn’t have a tail. 4) You know which pages the good parts are on. 5) You suddenly hate thunderstorms. 6) You start hearing Percabeth in every song you hear. 7) You started calling your dog Mrs. O’Leary. 8) You start figuring out who your godly parent is. 9) You never looked at a ballpoint pen the same way again. 10) You have a plan to get out of school early on october 2011 so you can buy The son of neptune, read it, and still have time to do your homework. 11) You ask the cashier at the store if they stock Mythomagic cards. 12) You start doing pro/con lists in your head. During Math. When you’re supposed to be taking notes. 13) You start spelling character names out of your spelling words. 14) You start loving blue plastic hairbrushes and anyone who wields them. 15) Each day you check every fan site you know of for new information. 16) You try to figure out how much food dye you need to turn chocolate chip cookies blue. 17) You make references to it in school reports and/or to friends that haven’t read it. 18) The first thing you ask someone when you meet them is, “Have you read PJO?” 19) On your trip to Washington D.C. you thought of Annabeth every time you saw a monument. 20) You yell “Mizzenmast!” whenever you enter a boat. 21) You dream about PJO every night. 22) You curse a god/goddess a lot (Oh Zeus is one I use a lot) 23) You have one (Or more) pictures relating to PJO in your room or on your PC 24) You know PJO better then most sane people 25) You have links to every great PJO site. 26) You add things to the list every day 27) You know what you would do if you were Percy. 28) You argue with your friends about if Nico should turn evil or not 29) At least half of your friends have read all the PJO, or are going to in the very near future 30) You wish you could find a rainbow to see if Iris messages work(totally) 31) For April Fools, you put a piece of paper over a card/cards and told your friends that they were Myth-O-Magic cards and they understood 32) Your friends all have a godly parent, and so do you, and your family, and your extended family, and your far, far, far away cuzs' 33) You are trying to learn Greek 34) You keep thinking about one of the PJO books when you go on a trip. 35) Every language you know is some form of Ancient greek. 36) You shriek everytime you see a guy with black hair and green eyes 37) You have an instant crush on Nico! 38) You just have to research more about greek mythology. 39) You call up the Camp Half Blood number in LT 40) You yell at Percy for being such an idiot some times. 20 ways to maintain a healthy level of insanity: 1: At lunch time, sit in you car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars; see if they slow down 2: Page yourself over the intercom. Do not disguise your voice. 3: Every time some one asks you to do something, ask them if they want fries with that 4: Put you garbage can on your desk and label it "IN" 5: Put decaf in the coffee maker (home or work). When everyone gets over their caffeine addiction, switch to espresso 6: In your memo book, on all your checks, put "FOR SMUGGLING DIAMONDS" 7: Finish all your sentences with "In Accordance To The Prophecy" 8: Dont use any punctuation 9: As often as possible, skip instead of walking 10: Order diet water whenever you go out with a serious face 11: Specify that your drive-thru order is "TO GO" 12: Sing along at the opera 13: Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme 14: Put mosquito netting around your work area (or room) and play tropical sounds all day 15: 5 days in advance, tell your friend that you can't go to their party cause you don't 'feel like it' 16: Have friends or coworkers address you by your wrestling name "Rock Bottom" 17: When the cash comes out of the ATM yell, "I WON, I WON!!!!!!!!!" 18: When exiting the zoo, start running toward the parking lot, yelling, "Run for your lives they're loose" 19: Tell your children (or younger sibling) that "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go" 20: And the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity is... Copy this and put it on your profile! 25 Fun Things to do at McDonald's: 2. Pay entirely in pennies. 3. Tell them you require three copies of the receipt for filing reasons. 4. Order a shake, and tell them you want bacon with it. If they say no, complain loudly for others to hear, and scream out, "I guess you really don't wana see me smile do you, because right now I don't exactly feel like smiling in light of the extenuating circumstances!" 5. Ask to see the manager, then complain to him about all of life’s problems. If they don’t let you talk to the manager, walk out muttering, “You're gonna be reading about this in the papers.” 6. While you’re in line, jump up and down like you’re having a spazz attack and scream repeatedly, “YO QUIERO TACO BELL!” 7. Sell White Castle food in the restrooms. Then when people get food poisoning you can blame it on McDonald’s. 8. Walk in wearing a Burger King hat. (Great when 3 or 4 people do this at the same time.) 9. Bring in a fart machine and keep setting it off, meanwhile making comments like, “Man, I knew I shouldn’t have eaten here.” 10. Return your food and tell them you’re allergic to nuclear waste mixed with gasoline byproducts. 11. Bring in a video camera and tell them they’re live on 20/20. (You should see the looks on their faces!) 12. Stand on a table with a megaphone and whenever somebody complains say, “This isn’t Burger King, you can’t have it your way.” 13. Flood the soda fountain machine. (It’s more interesting than flooding toilets.) 14. Walk to the drive-thru window and order. (If you really wanna tick ‘em off, skateboard.) 15. Take about 30 or so straws and blow all the wrappers at people. If anyone gives you a look, act a bit too innocent. 16. Speak gibberish, and act confused when they try to tell you that they don’t know how to speak gibberish too. 17. Chuck something at one of the employees. (I bet you five bucks they chuck it back.) 18. Chuck Skittles, M&Ms, or other small candy back into the cooking area. 19. Take two bites out of your burger, then tell the employee it’s cold and ask for a new one. Then repeat. And repeat. And repeat.” 20. Act like annoying while you’re ordering. (“I’ll have a cheeseburger.” “No, chicken nuggets!” “Cheeseburger!”) Slap yourself to make it look convincing. 21. Climb on top the Play Place. When they tell you to come down, fall off and pretend your hurt, then threaten to sue. 22. When it’s your turn to order, start a conversation with the employee. Ask them how was their day, etc. When someone gets ticked and calls for the manager, scram, or start a conversation with him too. 23. Try to stuff your coins sideways into the charity box. Then when they don’t fit, start complaining loudly about how McDonald’s is so greedy and how they’re ripping off their charities. (Act really outraged about it.) 24. Try to bribe an employee for cheaper food. If they give in, call the manager. (Keep any food they gave you, though.) 25. Walk in and go sit down in a seat, then grab the little table advertisement thingy, (you know what I'm talking about, the triangular thingy by the salt and pepper, yeah that.) Well look at it turning it over and over and then say defiantly, "I know what I'm going to order, I'm ready!" After about five minutes, scream out, "Waiter!" Then after about five more minutes get up, and stomp out of the restaurant with the advertisement thingy. Then turn arround, come back in, and throw the advertisement thingy at the cashier and yell, "Your service sucks! You just lost yourself a customer, you hear that! A customer! Your not gonna see me smile!" 16 Things to do when you're in Walmart! What to Do During an Exam Randomness Files Opens mailbox and skims through mail* "Junk...junk...junk...coupon...ooo they're having a sale at Bob's Buffalo Buffet...junk...junk...UGH! I joined the dark side years ago! Why do they keep sending me brochures!" *Throws down mail and stomps inside then runs back out* "I almost forgot my coupon!" Slinky escalator = endless fun"When there's an awkward silence... FOR NARNIA!" Don’t mess with me; I've got a stick Don't follow in my footsteps, I tend to walk into walls I call things as I see them; If I didn't see them, I make them up! You laugh now because you're older than me by mere months, but when you're 30 and I'm still 29, who will be laughing then? "I dont suffer from insanity... I enjoy every minute of it." 1 out of every 4 people are insane. Look at your three best friends, if it's not them, it's you. I am NOT saying your stupid...I'm just implying it. You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff ... I laugh even harder. Hey, I'm the one that pushed you! A wise man once said, "Ask a girl." "Diamonds are a girls best friend...because they're shaper then knives." "Boys are like lava lamps fun to look at, but not very bright." If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried. I took the road less traveled... NOW WHERE THE HECK AM I? Always forgive your enemies: Nothing annoys them more Remember what you just said, because tomorrow I am going to have a witty and sarcastic comeback and you'll be devastated then! I believe you should live each day as if it is your last, which is why I don't have any clean laundry because, come on, who wants to wash clothes on the last day of their life? "I'm not afraid of Death. What's he gonna do,kill me?" People tell me I'm weird and I say "You just figured that out?" Best friends are the people that know all about you and still put up with you. I don't have a short attention span, I just - ooh, a kitty! I'm not insane . . . I just do whatever the voices tell me to. Isn't it funny how people who want quiet are always the loudest telling people to shut up? If you can't convince them, confuse them. My friends are the type of people who would try to drown a fish, but I love them anyways. I like you. When the world is mine, your death shall be quick and painless. There are no stupid questions, just stupid people and their questions. I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was going to blame you. Do not disturb, I'm disturbed enough already. Earth is the insane asylum of the universe. There's no place like home . . . but Wal-mart's close. You can't argue with all the fools in the world. It's easier to let them have their own way, then trick them when they aren't paying attention. When you wish upon a falling star, your dreams can come true. Unless it's actually a meteor hurtling toward Earth which will destroy all life. Then you're pretty much doomed no matter what you wish for. Unless it's death by meteor. There is a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line. Remember that you are unique. Just like everybody else. Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you. If you can stay calm when all around you is complete chaos, you probably haven't fully understood the situation. Don't knock on death's door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that. If the world gives you lemons, you can make lemonade... or you can make a biologically engineered virulent air-born pathogenic virus that will wipe out the entire population of the planet, which would be a whole lot cooler. Don't worry about the people in your past, there's a reason they didn't make it to your future. The rules only apply if you get caught. I got fired from the M&M factory for throwing away all the w's. A true idiot climbs a glass wall to see what's on the other side. I used all my sick days so I called in dead. Don't worry about the end of the world coming today. It's already tomorrow in Australia. Kids are the future. Be afraid, very afraid! Why be difficult, when with just a little more effort, you can be impossible? You're a great friend, but if zombies chase us . . . I'm tripping you. So many stupid people, so little duct tape. I'm too tired to punch you. Would you please run your face into my fist repeatedly? I have multiple personalities, and none of them like you. I don't understand white crayons! Why are they here? What do they want from us? "Let's eat Grandma!" or "Let's eat, Grandma!" Punctuation saves lives. Get real. No one's going to form a single-file line if the building's on FIRE! The next sentence is true. The previous sentence is false. A rejected invention:Instant water! Just add water! Don't ever attempt a staring contest with a brick wall, they cheat a lot Don't make me mad...I'm known to bite at random!! Don't walk in my footsteps. I walk into walls. What happens if you get scared half to death twice? Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the universe striving to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the universe is winning. You laugh because I'm different. I laugh because you're all the same. A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing. A positive attitude may not solve all of your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort. I don't suffer from insanity - I enjoy every minute of it I wondered why the frisbee was getting bigger, then it hit me "You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain." yeah, i hit like a girl but you could to if you hit a bit harder. If you keep telling me to be more like you and stop to smell the roses then I'll laugh when you inhale a bee. i'm bored with nothing to do and a baseball bat. *My friend* RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Who cares about hugs?!?!?!?! If I see you I'm gonna tackle you. Here's what ya do: mark your answers with a little 'x' in the () if its true, but BE HONEST (I was)!! Then copy and paste it onto your profile! 1 (x) Gum has fallen out of your mouth when you were talking 2 (x) Gum has fallen out of your mouth when you were NOT talking 3 (x) You have ran into a glass/screen door 4 () You have jumped out of a moving vehicle 5 (x) You have thought of something funny and laughed, then people gave you weird looks 6 (x) You have ran into a tree 7 (x)It IS possible to lick your elbow 8 (x) You tried to lick your elbow 9 (x) You never knew that the Alphabet and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star have the same rhythm 10 (x) You just tried to sing them 11 (x) You have tripped on your shoelace and fallen 12 (x) You have choked on your own spit 13 () You have seen the the Matrix and still don't get it.. 14 (x) You didn't notice that in the last question 'the' was spelled twice 15 (x) You just looked at it 16 () Your hair is blonde/dirty blonde 17 (x) A LOT of People have called you slow 18 () You have accidentally caught something on fire 19 (x) You tried to drink out of a straw, but it went into your nose/eyes 20 (x) You have caught yourself drooling 21 (x) You've fallen asleep in class 22 (x) Sometimes you just stop thinking 23 (x) You are telling a story and forget what you were talking about 24 (x) People are often shaking their heads and walk away from you 25 () You are often told to use your 'inside voice' (I am told to talk LOUDER!) 26 (x) You use your fingers to do simple maths 27 () You have eaten a bug 28 (x) You are taking this test when you should be doing something important. (Homework which is due tomorrow and preparing for my college interview but who cares?! Oh yeah me...) 29 (x) You have put your clothes on backwards or inside out, and didn't realize it 30 (x) You've looked all over for something and realized it was in your hand or pocket 31 () You sometimes post bulletins because you are scared that what they say will happen to you if you don't even when you know it won't happen to you, like on a myspace... 32 (x) You break a lot of things 33 () Your friends know not to use big words around you 34 (x) You sometimes tilt your head when you're confused 35 (x) You have fallen out of your chair before 36 (x) When you're laying in bed, you try to find pictures in the texture of the ceiling/wall. 37 (x) The word 'like' is used many times a day 38 (x) You called a friend and then completely forgot what you were gonna say 39 (x) You have spelled your name wrong 40 (x) You have drawn a disformed heart Before you can be old and wise, you must first be young and stupid :-D The Random Tests Write your name with your hands. Shannon Write your name with your nose. shahhnonh (Not too bad...) Write your name with your elbow. aswzhjnyuQn mjnmj holnhmj u Type your name with your knuckles: shannin Type your name w/ a pen w/o looking: Shannon (Skills...) Type your name w/o looking: Shannon (Skills...) What I would be: Sun or Moon: Moon Night or Day: Night Spotlight or Shadows: Shadow Cold or Hot: Cold Loud or Quiet: Quiet Black or White (color not race): Black 1.Put your iTunes (or iPod) on shuffle 1.WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO? Don't stop - 5SOS 2. WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU? They don't know about us - One Durection 3. WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN? All the way up - Alana de Fonseca 4.WHAT IS 22? Can't back down - Camp Rock 2 5. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND? Rockstar - Hannah Montana 7.WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY? Scratch - The Beach Girl 5 8.WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP? I wish - One Direction 10.WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU? Breakout - Shake it up 11.WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING? Shake it up - Selena Gomez Really Dumb Store labels: On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (Too late!) On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (As night follows day . . .) On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (But wouldn't this save me more time?) On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.) On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (One would hope.) On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (As opposed to what?) On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (I gotta admit, I'm curious.) On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (Talk about a news flash.) On artificial bacon: "Real artificial bacon bits". (So we don't get fake fake bacon. Oh no we get real fake bacon.) Liquid plummer-"Do not reuse the bottle to store beverages." Arm and hammer scoopable cat litter-"safe to use around pets" Endust duster-"This product is not defined flammable by the consumer products safety commission regulations. However this product can be ignited under certain circumstances" Baby oil-"Keep out reach of children." Hair coloring-"Do not use as an ice cream topping." Sleeping pills-"Warning: may cause drowsiness" Komatsu Floodlight-"This floodlight is capable of illuminating large areas, even in the dark" Earplugs-"These earplugs are nontoxic, but they may interfere with breathing if caught in windpipe." RCA television remote control-"Not dishwasher safe." Road sign-"Caution: water on road during rain." Hair dryer-"Do not use while sleeping" On a bar of Dial soap- "Directions: use like regaular soap" Some Swann frozen dinners-"Serving sugestion: Defrost" Hey you! I know you're just dying to do this!! 1. Write the name of a person of the opposite sex. 2. Which is your favorite color out of red, black, blue, and green, yellow? 3. Your first initial? 4. Your month of birth? 5. Which color do you like more, black or white? 6. Name of a person of the same sex as yours. 7. Your favorite number? 8. Do you like California or Florida more? 9. Do you like the lake or the ocean more? 10. Write down a wish (a realistic one). Are you done? If so, scroll down (Don’t cheat--) THE ANSWERS 1. You are completely in love with this person. 2. If you choose: Red: You are alert and your life is full of love. Black: You are conservative and aggressive. Green: Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back. Blue: You are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the ones you Love. Yellow: You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are Down. 3. If you’re initial is: A-K: You have a lot of love and friendships in your life. L-R: You try to enjoy life to the maximum and your love life is soon to Blossom. S-Z: You like to help others and your future love life looks very good. 4. If you were born in: Jan.-Mar.: The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you Fall in love with someone totally unexpected. Apr.-June: You will have a strong love relationship that will not last long but The memories will last forever. July-Sept.: You will have a great year and will experience a major life Changing experience for the good. Oct.-Dec.: Your love life will not be too great, but eventually you will find your Soul mate. 5. If you choose... Black: Your life will take on a different direction; it will seem hard at the time But will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change. White: You will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do Anything for you, but you may not realize it. 6. This person is your best friend. 7. This is how many close friends you have in a lifetime. 8. If you choose... 9. If you choose... 10. This wish will come true only if you RE-POST THIS BULLETIN in one hour and it will come true before your next birthday! Pledge to the Gods: I promise to remember Ares Each time I hear of World War II And I promise to remember Athena Whenever I hear of a loom I promise to use the internet For Hermes' sake of course And I promise to remember Poseidon Whenever I ride a horse I promise to remember Zeus Whenever lightning fills the sky And I promise to remember Hera Every time a guy makes a girl cry I promise to remember Aphrodite Whenever I see a girdle made of gold And I promise to remember Apollo When the sun is very bold I promise to remember Artemis When the moon shines in the night And I promise to remember Hades When something gives me a fright I promise to remember Demeter Whenever a daughter moves away And I promise to remember Hephaestus When someone never gets their way I promise to remember Dionysus When I am at a party And I promise to remember Hestia When someones smile is very hearty Yes I promise to love The Gods Wherever I may go So that all may see my obsession Because I know what the Olympians know! What a Boyfriend SHOULD do: When she walks away from you mad, follow her Sweetness This is really sweet... When a girl is quiet, a million things are running through her mind. I'm the Girl I'm the girl who will put my head on your shoulder, not because I'm sleepy, but because I want to be closer to you. I'm the girl who says,"Okay, but you owe me...", not because I actually want something, but because it means I get to spend more time with you. I'm the girl you can take absolutely anywhere and I will have fun because it means I am spending time with you. I'm the girl who is incredibly picky, but when I find someone I like; I want to spend the whole night curled up in their arms. I'm the girl who once I let you into my heart, there's always a place there with your name on it. I'm the girl who never forgets you. I'm the girl who loves it when you give me flowers for no apparent reason. I'm the girl who thinks the world of you. All I want is for us to be together. I WANT A GUY... who would move the hair away from my eyes and then kiss me, hold my hand in line at the mall and make all the girls jealous. Someone who would sing to me at random moments. Who would let me sleep on his chest. A BOY who would get mad at someone if they called me UGLY or were mean to me. I want someone who would call me 3 times a day if he went away. Someone who would let me gossip to him and just smile and agree with everything I said. He would throw stuffed animals at me when I acted dumb and then KISS ME A MILLION TIMES. Someone who would make fun of me just to make me laugh. He would take me to the park and put his hands around my waist and give me big bearhugs all the time. He would tell all his friends about me and SMILE when he did. And we'd make out in the pouring rain. He would never be afraid to say "I love you" in front of his friends, and we'd argue about silly things and then make up. I want a boy who would kiss me at midnight on New Years and COUNT STARS with me. Who would stay home with me on a Friday night just to help me make dinner and watch movies together under the same blanket. Someone who would tell me I'm beauiful but not too often, who would make me laugh like NO ONE else could. But mostly, I want someone who would be my best friend and would never BREAK MY HEART HOW GUYS FLIRT: 1. He stares at you alot. 2. He hits you alot. (just play hitting ) 3. He uses the first thing that pops into his head to start a converstaion with you 4. He yelled, "Hi!", to your mum that day she picked you up from school 6. He tries to make you laugh anyway even if he gets hurt in the process 7. His voice gets softer when ever you two talk. 8. You hung up on him. He called you back. 9. You were invited by him to a group outing. 10. He called you to talk about nothing at all. 11. He imitates your laugh. OK, you do laugh PRETTY LOUD. Which makes you laugh even harder... 12. He remembers little things you mention in casual conversation 13. He sometimes stares straight into your eyes. 14. He uses every possible way to touch you (your hair, face, thighs, KNEES,ect.) HOW GIRLS FLIRT: 1.She calls you by your full name not just a nick name. 2. She hits you softly on the arm and laughs when you say something funny. 3. She flips her hair when she's talking to you. 4. She touches your arm when she talks to you. 5. She says, "No, I'm not telling you who I like!" with a big smile on her face. 6. She asks you who you like or who you would go out with seemingly interested. 7. When you go to the movies with a bunch of your friends and she is almost always next to you. 8. She criticizes you on a girl you like. 9. You catch her staring at you. 10. She plays with your hair or tries to put make up on you. 11. Her friends outside of school and in school know about you, and says she talks about you a lot. 12. She knows your phone number and address. 13. She will try and talk, and spend time with you as much as possible 44 things a girl would die for 1-touch her waist are you remembering this? 6-hug her keep reading 11-smile with her Are you thinking about someone? 16-always hug her and say "i love you" when you see her oh, and on that last one... u need to show her you mean it too 21-kiss her on the lips 26-don't lie to her are you still reading this? u better be, its important 31. Hold her close when she's cold so she can hold you too. remember this next time you are with her 36. when people diss her, stand up for her. take her side no matter what. MAKE SURE SHE KNOWS SHES LOVED 41. Call her at night to wish her sweet dreams. 42. Comfort her when she cries and wipe away her tears. 43. Take her for long walks at night. (she'll feel safe, if you put your arms around her.) youll never know when she needs just a lil more love repost this in 20 sec. or you will lose the one you care about the most!! A few things to say to guys (i might use these in a story): Guy: Haven't I seen you some place before? Guy: Can I buy you a drink? Guy: How did you get to be so beautiful? Guy: Your face must turn a few heads. Guy: Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out. Guy: I think I could make you very happy. Guy: What would you say if I asked you to marry me? Guy: Can I have your name? Guy: want to see a movie? Guy: Where have you been all my life? Man: Is this seat empty? Man: Your place or mine? Man: So, what do you do for a living? Man: Hey baby, what's your sign? Man: Your body is like a temple. Man: I would go to the end of the world for you. Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning? Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy. Man: Your eyes, they're amazing. Man: Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven? Man: I'm God's gift to women Guy: I'd like to call you. What's your number? Guy: I know how to please a woman Guy: I can tell you want me Guy: If you were a hamburger at McDonalds you would be McGorgeous Guy: Did it hurt when you fell out of heaven Guy: Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again Guy: I want to give myself to you Guy: It's a good thing I have a library card because I'm checking you out Man: Your name must be Daisy, because I have the incredible urge to plant you right here! Man: Are you from Tenessee, 'cause your the only TEN-I-SEE Before you judge a person, walk a mile in his shoes. After that, it doesn't matter because you're a mile away from him, and you've got his shoes. Come to the dark side. We have COOKIES! Welcome to the dark side. Are you surprised that we lied about having cookies? You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder. Keep smiling; it makes everyone wonder what you're up to. We must never, ever be mean to stupid people. If we are, they might go away. Then who would we laugh at? Silence is golden, but duct tape is silver. It’s retarded it’s ridiculous it’s re-dic-u-tard-ed. What girls don't seem to know: when a guy acts like he hates you, chances are, he likes you. One day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously and change the subject. I was gifted, but the psychiatrist took away my powers. The world is full of crazy people. They made me their leader. Don't mess with me, I've got a stick. Boys are like Slinky's . . . useless, but fun to watch fall down stairs. Slinky escalator = endless fun People tell me I'm weird and I say "You just figured that out?" Best friends are the people that know all about you and still put up with you. I don't have a short attention span, I just - ooh, a kitty! I'm not insane . . . I just do whatever the voices tell me to. Isn't it funny how people who want quiet are always the loudest telling people to shut up? If you can't convince them, confuse them. My friends are the type of people who would try to drown a fish, but I love them anyways. I like you. When the world is mine, your death shall be quick and painless. There are no stupid questions, just stupid people and their questions. I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was going to blame you. Do not disturb, I'm disturbed enough already. Earth is the insane asylum of the universe. There's no place like home . . . but Wal-mart's close. You can't argue with all the fools in the world. It's easier to let them have their own way, then trick them when they aren't paying attention. Apparently 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. And there are five people in my family, so it must be one of them. Either it's my mom or my dad. Or my older brother Collin. Or my other brother, Ho-Chan-Chu. I think its Collin. The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources. When you wish upon a falling star, your dreams can come true. Unless it's actually a meteor hurtling toward Earth which will destroy all life. Then you're pretty much hosed no matter what you wish for. Unless it's death by meteor. There is a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line. Remember that you are unique. Just like everybody else. When you get caught looking at him, just remember, he was looking back. Secret admirers are stalkers with stationary. Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you. If you can stay calm when all around you is complete chaos, you probably haven't fully understood the situation. Don't knock on death's door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that. If the world gives you lemons, you can make lemonade... or you can make a biologically engineered virulent air-born pathogenic virus that will wipe out the entire population of the planet, which would be a whole lot cooler. Don't worry about the people in your past, there's a reason they didn't make it to your future. The rules only apply if you get caught. I got fired from the M&M factory for throwing away all the w's. A true idiot climbs a glass wall to see what's on the other side. I used all my sick days so I called in dead. Don't worry about the end of the world coming today. It's already tomorrow in Australia. Kids are the future. Be afraid, very afraid! Why be difficult, when with just a little more effort, you can be impossible? You're a great friend, but if zombies chase us . . . I'm tripping you. So many stupid people, so little duct tape. I'm too tired to punch you. Would you please run your face into my fist repeatedly? I have multiple personalities, and none of them like you. I don't understand white crayons! Why are they here? What do they want from us? "Let's eat Grandma!" or "Let's eat, Grandma!" Punctuation saves lives. Get real. No one's going to form a single-file line if the building's on FIRE! The next sentence is true. The previous sentence is false. One day, I wondered why the frisbee was getting bigger, Then it hit me Two men walk into a bar, The third one ducks. Boys are like lava lamps, fun to watch but not too bright. If your heart was really broken, you'd be dead. So SHUT UP! WARNING- stop throwing your cigarette butts on the carpet! Seriously, the cockroaches are getting cancer! Warning: trespassers will be shot. Survivors will be shot again. Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up Of course I'm talking to myself, who else can I trust? One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions. I'm not afraid of Death, what's it gonna do kill me? If two wrongs don't make a right...try three. When life gives you lemons, squirt them in the eyes of your enemies. My knight in shining turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil. It's better to keep quiet and let someone think you're stupid, than to open your mouth and prove it. It's all fun and games until someone gets hurt...then it's hilarious. if you talk about me i got some advice. click your heels 3 times and say 'i wish i had a life'! OMG! i think i just saw a flying bird! let me write that down in my 'things i dont really give f about' notebook. yea you have the right to your own opinion, but i have the right to think your stupid. warning: im sarcastic and i hurt peoples feeling sometimes, boo hoo. get over it.! I don't obsess, I think intensely! I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it! "Some see the glass half full, some see it half empty. Me? i just want to know who the hell is drinking my damn soda." I dream of a better world...where chickens can cross roads without having their morals questioned. "The greener grass on the other side is probably just artificial turf." "Nobody move! I dropped my brain." "He who laughs last didn't get it." Practice makes perfect, but nobody's perfect, so why practice? When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear. Education is important; school however, is another matter. I had my soul removed to make room for sarcasm and I don't regret it. Boys are like trees - they take 50 years to grow up. Hello. You have reached the Sixth Sense Detective Agency. We know who you are, where you are from, and what you want so there is no need to leave a message. Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed. The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not. I got an A in philosophy because I proved my professor doesn’t exist. If your parents never had children, chances are you won’t either. Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone might actually clean them? There are no stupid questions – just a bunch of inquisitive idiots. Politics is war without bloodshed. War is politics with bloodshed. High School Musical 3 and Saw V were the two top movies at the box office when they opened. One depicted gruesome on screen torture. The other was about a guy with a saw. (XDDD) It takes 47 muscles to frown, 13 to smile and absolutely none to sit there with a dumb look on your face. I’m not afraid to die. I just don’t want to be there when it happens. I do not deny everything. Sometimes the mind, for reasons we do not necessarily understand, just decides to go into storage. Love me or hate me. Personally I could care less Isn't it ironic . . . we ignore those who adore us, adore those who ignore us, hurt those who love us, and love those who hurt us Don't follow in my footsteps . . . I run into walls. Do you want to know why I'm still on earth? Heaven kicked me out and hell is afraid I'll take over... Hello and welcome to the Mental Health Hot-line. If you are obsessive compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent ask someone to press 2 for you. If you have multiple personalities press 3, 4, 5, 6. If you are paranoid, we know what you are and what you want so stay on the line and we'll trace your call. If you are delusional press 7 and your call will be sent to the Mother Ship. If you are schizophrenic listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press. If you are depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer you. If you are dyslexic press 6, 9, 6, 9, 6, 9. If you have a nervous disorder fidget with the hatch key until the beep. After the beep, please wait for the beep. If you have short term memory loss, please try your call again later and if you have low self esteem, hang up; all our operators are too busy to talk to you. Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most. The road to success is always under construction. Ideas don't stay in some minds very long because they don't like solitary confinement. Save the earth. It's the only planet with chocolate. I'm not so good with the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment? The dinosaurs' extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all commited suicide. Basic Definitions of Science: If it's green or wiggles, it's biology. If it stinks, it's chemistry. If it doesn't work, it's physics. When the going gets tough, the tough get duct tape Life's tough...Get a helmet I stopped fighting my inner demons... We're on the same side now! SHUT UP VOICES!! or I'll poke you with the Q-tip again... If Barbie's So Popular, Why Do You Have To Buy Her Friends Life's Greatest Pleasure Is Doing What People Tell You Not To Do Never Go To A Doctor Whose Office Plants Have Died Man Invented Language To Satisfy Their Deep Need To Complain Magic is the stuff Science hasn't made boring yet! What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere? 'Hold my purse.' "If you don't understand my silence, then you won't understand my words." Forgive your enemies - it messes with their heads :P I wouldn't have OCD if everyone else would just do things the right way. Alice in Wonderland Oh! Is that the story of Alice before she went into the Asylum? People that don't know me think I'm quiet. People that do wish I was. Sarcasm. It's easier than actually having to deal with stupid people. Great comebacks: If someone you hate asks you this: "How much do you hate me?" YOU respond: "Im not allowed to use that kind of language." If someone you like asks you this: "Do you like me?" YOU respond: "Good question!" then walk away. If someone really mean says this: "Your really bad at *insert something here* YOU respond: Yes. yes i am. (it totally works!) If someone asks you something and you didnt hear them.. YOU shrug your shoulders! works for everything. If your late to class and your teacher asks: "Why are you late?" YOU respond: "I was fighting Aliens in the 4th dimension when one of their cheese rays blew one of the tires on my space jeep and I had to stop and get it changed on my way here. There was also a HUGE line for the popcorn." if you put your name on the bottom of all your school papers instead of on the NAME line for a week and your teacher gets irratated and asks this: "Why cant you just put it up on the line that says NAME instead of making me look for it? its easier." YOU respond: yeah but its TOO easy. Proofreading is a dying art, wouldn't you say? Real Headlines: Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over Miners Refuse to Work after Death Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant War Dims Hope for Peace If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures Enfield ( London ) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft Kids Make Nutritious Snacks Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors And the winner is... Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead (Did I read that right?) Am I the only one who wondered which made Artemis angrier? a) The fact that man conquered the moon, or b) the fact that they named the missions to do so after her annoying brother Apollo. I, for one, think it's the second, because mankind has the right to explore the universe, but Apollo already has the sun, so he should keep his hands off the moon. For PJO FANS: NORMAL PEOPLE: rely on their local weatherman for the weather forecast PJO FANS: will tell Zeus to make it rain NORMAL PEOPLE: say OMG! PJO FANS: say OH MY GODS! NORMAL PEOPLE: go to a psychiatrist to tell their feelings PJO FANS: won't go to one because they will take away their awesome demigod powers NORMAL PEOPLE: say shut up or i'll tell on you! PJO FANS: say shut up or my godly parent will vaporize you! NORMAL PEOPLE: think that PJO fans are stupid PJO FANS: know that normal people are stupid NORMAL PEOPLE: when being chased yell HELP ME SOMEBODY! PJO FANS: when being chased use their awesome demigod powers NORMAL PEOPLE: get nervous/scared during thunderstorms PJO FANS: yell at Zeus to calm down NORMAL PEOPLE: would choose somewhere sunny to go for vacation PJO FANS: would try and find Camp Half Blood NORMAL PEOPLE: don't have this on their profile PJO FANS: MUST have this on their profile! This is the meme that inspired "Don't even go there. Unless you want me to tell you about my life... When Drowning… Mortal: LIFEGUARD! PJO fan: PERCY! HP fan: “Eats Gilly-weed” When rain suddenly come… Mortal: Damn it! PJO fan: Grab a tissue Zeus! HP fan: Accio umbrella! Exclaiming… Mortal: Oh My god! PJO fans: Di Immortales! HP fan: Merlin’s pants! When angry… Mortal: Shut up! PJO: Thalia: Shut up or my dad will zap you! Percy: Shut up or my dad will blast you into seawater! Annabeth: Shut up or my mom will kill you with wisdom! Nico: Shut up or I’ll bring you to my dad NOW! Beckendorf: Shut up or I’ll invent something to kill you! Travis/Conner: Shut up or you will be as poor as a beggar! (They’d steal everything away.) Katie: Shut up or I'll make you eat cereal for the rest of your life! Silena: Shut up or my mom will mess up your love life! Castor: Shut up or my dad will wrap you with vines! Clarisse: Shut up. My dad's sharpening his knife. Chiron: Shut up or my dad will— Oh wait that doesn’t work. Shut up or I and my buddies will have a stampede on you! If you are addicted to demigods and would like to become one, post this onto your profile Has anyone else noticed how a lot of us get along and make friends on here and we can be from completely different countries? We're here making world peace on the INTERNET and we have all those ambassadors and senators and whatever struggling with it! If you realize this (or read this and agreed) copy and paste this and add your name and country (country is optional) to the list. SPREAD THE PEACE!!! Naruto-fan-Okami-chan (USA), NaraTemari011 (Puerto Rico), Lala girl in Lalaland (USA), Kakashi Forever (England), NinjasWillRuleTheWorld (Australia), Shadowtheangel (Sweden), Ice Prince Hitsugaya (USA), Gaara of the Desert564 (USA), RebeccaUlquiorraCifer23 (USA), TheCursedOne (Colombia), Wereninja (USA), DarkHorseBlueSky (USA), XxTheMoonRiddlexX (USA), River the Witch Girl (Russia), SnowFlower Frost (Canada/France),PurpleGoddess12 (Canada),MatthewSonOfPoseidon (Colombia and USA), Forever-Fangirl-PJO-HP(USA), ObsessedwReading (USA), shazzygirl (England) if you are a true Percy Jackson fan post this on your profile too! I am a book freak, yes. So what? While I hole myself up in a good story, you're off frying your brains. While I lose myself in unknown worlds, you're off playing Minecraft or World of Warcraft. While I learn things you cannot imagine, you're off failing school and your teachers and family. I know more about some characters than I do myself— characters you will never know. I can survive my whole life in a world— a world you will never see. I know the secrets of people, places, and creatures— all of which you will never meet. I could ruin your life, if I had the heart to and if you and I were in one of the worlds I know— and you would never tell the difference. I create worlds, people, creatures, but most of all lives with my words that you call another boring subject— something you will never experience the joy and pride of. I have ridden on dragons, outwitted darkness, eluded death a thousand times . . . I have saved lives, used magic, unraveled deathly secrets that could start wars . . . I have swum with the serpents, flown with the pegasi, howled with the wolves . . . I have stood upon the moon, fought in great battles, discovered new universes . . . I have relived long-gone lives, shaped new destinies, guided the paths of others . . . I have stepped into other worlds, become other creatures, experienced unimaginable things . . . I have lived through wars, living nightmares, the worst of tragedies . . . I have felt the joy, pride, and elation of just—knowing. Knowing the fact that you would never learn what I have. And never have I moved a single inch, as long as I read. I have travelled universes while sitting in a corner with a book For you one glance is what it took To say it was useless and stupid But you can never experience time travel or falling again and again, You can never live a life of the first daughter who hates it or experience victory over dictators, And other things I have, Yet you claim that all of this is boring— Boring, stupid, sad, uncool, dumb, even embarrassing. You say that this is something no one can like. And yet, here I stand, holding a book. If you agree with what I have written, copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to make our voices heard: Crystal Silvera, Akronite, Jasminehoran, Anjali Roongta Today, writers are scorned because of those too unversed to know. Copy and paste this acronym if you love Percy Jackson: Perseus Jackson. Savior of Olympus. Electricity. That's what will shock you if you mess with Thalia Grace. Riptide. Percy's lethal ballpoint pen. Clarisse. That's who will go after you if you beat her in a battle. (And you don't want an angry Clarisse. It's bad enough when she's not angry.) Yellow duffle bags. Helped Percy, Tyson, and Annabeth. Jason Grace. Thalia's "lost" little brother. Annabeth Chase. Percy's girlfriend and official architect of Olympus. Chiron. Trainer of heroes. Kaleidoscope. What Piper's eyes look like to Jason. Son of Neptune. The book we can't wait for. Olympus. Home of the gods. Nemesis. Ethan's mother. Don't worry, she's getting her revenge on his death. Atlas. Zoe's father. Never back down. The phrase that reminds me of TLO. Dionysus. The god of wine. (More like the god of Diet Coke.) Thalia Grace. Hunter of Artemis and daughter of Zeus. Hephaestus. The father of our favorite fire boy. ;) Empathy link. What Grover and Percy have. Saved Grover's life a couple of times. Officers. The immortal skeletons dressed up as officers. Lupa. The she-wolf we all want to know about. Morpheus. The gods of dreams. Put NYC asleep during TLO. Persephone. The kidnapped wife of Hades. Believes every hero is brave and wants to give them a chance. Ichor. The blood of the gods. Artemis. Goddess of the Hunt. Has hunters, including Thalia. Nothing lasts forever. Even the gods. Switched. Percy and Jason are switched. Jason at Camp Half-Blood, Percy at Camp Jupiter. If your profile is long, copy and paste this in to make it longer Strangers stab you in the front. Let's eat, Gramma! I find inspiration in cooking, my family, and my dog. Dear Math, Dear Math, Dear Yahoo, Dear The Optimist, The Pessimist, and The Realist, Roses are red. "If there are any idiots in the room, will they please stand up," the sarcastic teacher said. After a long silence, one freshman rose to his feet. "Now then mister, why do you consider yourself an idiot?" enquired the teacher. DO NOT READ THE NEXT SENTENCE. Real men don't sparkle. Real men defeat dark wizards. 364 days of the year, parents tell their kids not to take candy from strangers, but on Halloween, its encouraged. Does this make sense to anyone? Ron or Grover? Too hard to decide Annabeth or Hermione? Too difficult Luna or Leo? Waaayyyy too difficult Piper or Ginny? Ginny Neville or Frank? Too difficult Hazel or Cho? Hazel Percy or Reyna? Reyna Jason or Cedric? Jason Malfoy or Octavian? Malfoy Stoll Brothers or Weasley Twins? Weasley Twins Zeus or Fudge? Zeus definitely Dumbledore or Chiron? Chiron, Dumbledore is mostly seen as manipulative Peter or Luke? Luke Sally or Lily? Sally is great but she didn't sacrifice the way Lily did... They are both great mother figures who we admire greatly James or Poseidon? Poseidon Apollo or Sirius? Apollo, as much as I love Sirius, I cannot take his puns and his death is too upsetting... Plus Apollo is misjudged by everyone Remus or Artemis? I pity Remus and Artemis is a great Goddess, but the way she treats her twin... Still unsure Kronos or Voldemort? Voldemort Most importantly... HARRY POTTER or PERCY JACKSON? This is the difficult one... I liked HP before PJ, but they are both now my favourites...That is the question. DORMITORY: ASTRONOMER: DESPERATION: THE EYES: GEORGE BUSH: THE MORSE CODE : SLOT MACHINES: ANIMOSITY: ELECTION - RESULTS: SNOOZE ALARMS: A DECIMAL POINT: THE EARTHQUAKES: ELEVEN PLUS TWO: Q. Hermes asked you to help him repopulate Olympus...what is your answer to this disturbing question? In loving memory of... ...Luke Castellan, who died to save Olympus and will always be remembered as a hero ...Zoe Nightshade, who went on a quest knowing very well that she would die ...Bianca di Angelo, who sacrificed herself to save her friends ...Daedalus, who died to prevent Luke's army from using the Labyrinth ...Silena Beauregard, who died a hero ...Charles Beckendorf, who let himself die for the sake of a mission's success ...Ethan Nakumura, who redeemed himself in the end only to be killed by Kronos ...Everyone else who died in the Titan War A Hunger Games Addict's Prayer If my little sister pets a goat When I toss some wood in the fire The Capitol will cross my mind I'll always think of Glimmer Whenever I watch a reality show I swear to think of Cato I swear to remember the Hunger Games Kids Are Quick TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America . TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor? TEACHER: Glen, how do you spell 'crocodile?' TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water? TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago. TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty? TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with ' I. ' TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him? TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating? TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his? TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested? TEACHER: Manic, what did we say about loud voices?! MANIC: You didn't say anything about drums. TEACHER: *explodes* Dear Yahoo, Dear 6, Dear Noah, Dear America, Dear Impossible, Dear Dad, I think you took the Got-Your-Nose Game a little too seriously. Sincerely, Voldemort Don't play stupid with me...I'm better at it! If at first you don't succeed, skydiving isn't for you. I have PMS and a gun... now what were you saying? Important Things I Learned From Rick Riordan Even cat goddesses like growling at birds. Underwater kisses are way better than normal ones. The five elements are earth, air, fire, water, and cheese. Children of rival gods can fall in love. No one really knows why the Egyptians wrote without vowels. Nemean lions can be defeated with freeze dried ice cream. Eating fruit bats is bad for your health. Contrary to popular belief, hellhounds can be domesticated. The Set animal does not appreciate being named Leroy. Yes, that twelve year old wearing a silver jacket is a goddess. Jackal headed gods can be very attractive. Math teachers really are evil. Set's secret name is Evil Day. (Use this to your advantage...) It's not easy to insult a daughter of Athena. Elvis was a magician. No, really. Do not trust the bald man who wants to sell you a water bed. Boomerangs can cast spells. It's possible to gamble moonlight. Even the ferryman of the dead wants a pay raise. Rainbows have power. Fruit bats can be deadly. If you hear a voice in your head, you're not crazy - you just have an uber-powerful god living inside you. Demons will give you free samples if you ask nicely. You say Twilight, I say Harry Potter. You say vampires, I say wizards. You say Jacob Black, I say Sirius Black. You say Team Edward, I say Team Potter.g You say Robert Pattison, I'll say "is Cedric Diggory". You say Robert Pattison is hot, I say Daniel Radcliffe is HOTTER. You think Bella and Edward are the perfect dream couple? I think that's Harry and Ginny. Harry taught me to find INNER STRENGTH and do what is right in the face of ADVERSITY. Ron taught me that it's never too late to COME BACK. Hermione taught me everything I KNOW. Severus taught me to LOVE, always. Gred and Forge taught me to LAUGH even in the darkest of times. Minerva taught me to FIGHT till the end. Dumbledore taught me how to TRUST. Luna taught me TO BE MYSELF. TONKS taught me TO NEVER GIVE UP ON LOVE. Lupin taught me TO SACRIFICE. Dobby taught me LIBERTY. HARRY POTTER FTW!! THE I WILL NOT'S...Or WAS NOT! Sirius Black was not killed by drapery! I will not tease Remus Lupin about his "time of the month" Gryffindors and Syltherins do not dislike each other...they hate each other... Potter men do not fall in love with blondes...they fall for red-heads. Chiuauha's are not as awesome as Grims. Remus and Sirius do NOT belong together Severus Snape is NOT a sexy beast Draco Malfoy is NOT in love with any part of the Golden Trio... The Golden Trio is not the Golden Trio...it's the Golden Quadruple, because all the emotions and such make up one person... Fudge is NOT an awesome minister Umbridge should NOT rule Hogwarts J.K. ROWLING SHOULD NOT STOP THE HARRY POTTER SERIES!!! Gryffindor (The biggest heros in HP history as far as we know): 1. Welcome to Gryffindor, a Weasley has probably slept in your bed. 2. Gryffindors: Brave to the point of Idiocy. 3. Gryffindor: Because we blur the line between bold and stupid every time. 4. The beautiful, the brave and the bold. 5. Gryffindor: I'll kick your ass. 6. I'm in Gryffindor, you're in Gryffindor- let's hug!! 7. Gryffindor: because we get enough exercise just pushing our luck. 8. No excuses, rule breaking is customary. 9. Gryffindors are attention whores. Slytherin (The Junior Death Eaters): 1. We aren't all evil... yeah, we are. 2. Cunning and Ambition: Slytherin. 3. Go ahead, be a little naughty. 4. Slytherin: We have chained boys in the dungeons. 5. Slytherin: Because our common room is underwater (and that's cool). 6. It's not that we aren't better than you (except it totally is). 7. Why be normal? Or good? 8. We are Junior Death Eaters. Deal with it. 9. Slytherin: means never having to say you're sorry. 10. Seriously evil wizard coming through. 11. I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. 12. Slytherins do it on Snape's desk. 13. Voldemort needs prison bitches. 14. Because real friends help you Incendio the bodies. 15. Property of the Half-Blood Prince. 16. We're only wearing black until something darker comes along. 17. Don't hate us because we're beautiful, hate us because we kick your ass at everything. 18. Never anger what can kill you. Hufflepuff (Some of the best people you'll ever meet): 1. I'm planning your death in a happy way. 2. Brace youself- I'm going to hug you. 3. Nobody ever suspects the Hufflepuff. 4. You may be smarter, cooler, and better, but we still think you suck. 5. You think we're nice? That's cute... 6. Nowhere in the song does it say we're nice. 7. The love of a Hufflepuff was the only love good enough for Neville. 8. Hufflepuff: We kill you with smiles and rainbows. 9. All we got was Cedric... and that didn't turn out so good, did it? 10. Hufflepuffs kick ass too. 11. Hufflepuff: Formerly known as the party house. 12. Hufflepuffs know how to party. 13. Hufflepuff: We have cupcakes. Need we say more? 14. Always forgive your enemies, nothing annoys them so much. 15. Hufflepuffs are Particularly good finders. Ravenclaw (The smartest house with the only ones who don't blow themselves up): Wit beyond measure is man's greatest treasure. 1. I don't need romance, I have goldfish. 2. A room without books is like a body without a soul. 3. I can kill you with my brain. 4. Ravenclaw pride. Be afraid. 5. It's not that we are smarter than you (except it totally is). 6. I'm a Ravenclaw, which clearly means I am eligible to boast about my intelligence level in your face. 7. Ravenclaw: because we know every insult in the book. (Get it, they're smart and they know every insult in the book!) 8. Ravenclaw: geeks shall inherit the earth. 9. Ravenclaw: Dangerously over-educated. 10. Ravenclaw: Tact enough for people who aren't witty enough to be sarcastic. 11. Ravenclaw: because everyone else is just dumb. x x XxXxXxXxXxX x xXxPotterxXx... RuLEs. x XxXxXxXxXxXx If you're in denial over Tonks and Remus' death's copy and paste this into your profile. If you support werewolf rights, copy & paste this into your profile. If you live and breathe Harry Potter, copy & paste this to your profile. Edward Cullen is not a vampire, he lives in a forest, doesn't eat people, and sparkles in the sunlight-he is obviously a fairy! Harry Voldemort, Voldemort Cedric, and Cedric = Edward. So, Harry Voldemort Edward. Therefore, Harry Edward. So, Harry Potter Twilight. If you agree with this form of logic, copy and paste this into your profile. Gryffindors...will jump off a cliff. Slytherins...will push someone else off. Hufflepuffs...will call five hundred others and build a staircase. Ravenclaws...will get hold of a flying carpet. Things not to do in Hogwarts 1) The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date to the Yule Ball. 2) I am not allowed to sing, "We're Off to See the Wizard" while skipping off to the Headmaster's office. 3) I am not allowed to take out a life insurance policy on Harry Potter. 4) I am not allowed to ask Dumbledore to show me the pointy hat trick. 5) I am not allowed to give Remus Lupin a flea collar. 6) I am not allowed to bring a Magic 8 Ball to Divination. 7) I am not allowed to say that Seamus Finnegan is "after me lucky charms." 8) I am not allowed to start a betting pool on this years Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. It's taste-less, tacky, and not a good money-making strategy. 9) I am not allowed to joke about Remus' "time of the month." 10) I am not allowed to make light saber sounds with my wand. NORMAL PEOPLE: don't have this on their profile HTTYD FANS: MUST have this on their profile! NORMAL PEOPLE: On a bad day will say "Today is just not my day." HTTYD Fans: will say "The Gods Hate Me! Normal people: Hear a shriek and ignore it How To Train Your Dragon Fans: hear a shriek and yell "NIGHT FURY! GET DOWN!" Normal people: see a mini Toothless figurine and say "eh, it's just a piece of plastic" HTTYD fans: see a mini Toothless figurine and scream "Oh my word! That is the cutest thing EVER! I must have it NOW!!!!!!!!!" Normal people: when asked what they need while fighting a dragon will say a weapon HTTYD fans: a doctor?! Plus 5 speed?! A shield! Normal people: when chased will call out for anyone to help HTTYD fans: Will call out for their dragon. Normal people: don't know the stats for the different dragons HTTYD fans: Nadder: Speed 8, Armor 16. Zippleback: attack 11, stealth x2. Monstrous Nightmare: firepower 15. Terrible Terror: Attack 8, venom 12. Gronckle: jaw strength 8 (thank you, Fishlegs) Normal people: What in God's name?! HTTYD fans: What in Thor's name?! Normal people: When asked how to defeat a dragon without killing it will not know. HTTYD fans: will instantly know to show them an eel, scratched them behind their head, give them some dragon-nip or reflect the light off something to let them chase it. Normal people: will buy maybe the plushies from the HTTYD merchandise or nothing at all. HTTYD fans: Will search every store for every collectible, clear a whole shelf in their room for them and make a saddle and tail piece for every Toothless plushy and figurine they have. Normal people: saw the HTTYD movie once in the cinema and maybe once at home. HTTYD fans: watch the movie again and again until they can resite every line off by heart (Example: *changes to Scottish accent* excuse me, barmaid, I'm afraid you brought me the wrong offspring. I ordered an extra large boy with beefy arms, extra guts and glory on the side. This here, this is a talking fish bone!) Normal people: whistle a popular song while they work HTTYD fans: whistle the HTTYD theme while they work Normal people: don't REALLY care when the second movie is realeast. HTTYD fans: will count down the days till the premier and check youtube every day for the next trailer (cursed teaser trailers!!) Normal people: will give whatever they can to people as gifts HTTYD fans: will never under ANY CIRCUMSTANCES give a Gronckle's egg to someone. Normal people: when telling someone to change their ways, will be nice about it. HTTYD fans: will say, "You've got to stop all...this." Normal people: "Astrid? Don't you mean 'asteroid'?" HTTYD fans: *dreamily* "Astrid..." Normal people: when in danger, "we ain't gonna live!" HTTYD fans: "chances of survival are dwindling into single digits now..." Normal people: will 'keep calm and carry on' HTTYD fans: will 'keep calm and wait for How To Train Your Dragon 2' Normal people: won't really care what they use for a belt buckle HTTYD fans: will never use anything bone-like. EVER! Normal people: if you want to get yourself killed, jump off a cliff or stab yourself or something HTTYD: if you want to get yourself killed, go with the Gronckle. Normal people: wisest quote - 'learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is to note stop questioning' - Albert Einstein HTTYD fans: 'if you get blasted, you're dead' - Gobber the Belch Normal people: will ignore this HTTYD fans: will post this into their profile and add their name to the list before the Red Death gets them ;) |
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