Captain Major

“What were you trying to do, put the whole ship to sleep?” -Captain Englehorn, Kingkong (2005)

My name is Captain Major,

I am a military enthusiast and I love to travel.

A little bit about me:

I absolutely love aviation! I've flown airplanes before, and I simply adore helicopters. I love being outside, and going on adventures. I am a certified sailor, and a weathered equestrian. I've done lots of traveling, and globe trotting is probably one of my favorite things.

5 Countries I recommend visiting:

1.) Canada: This is my country, baby! This is where it snows 8 months out of the year and where you're lucky if the temperature breaks 20 Celsius in the summer.

2.) Cuba: Ye ye, I know you Americans hate the Cubans, but frankly, they're really nice and hardworking people. If you can't get over the whole commie thing (It blew my mind too), just enjoy the beaches. The Beaches are GORGEOUS.

3.) Italy: This place is so gorgeous, hot, and delicious! The culture is fantastic! Everything is designer, too! The Tuscan countryside is just phenomenal. (The food ain't bad either!)

4.) Spain: I love this place! It's so hot! And if you bat your eyelashes at cranky guys selling tee shirts, they'll probably give you a discount (well, they did for me anyways...). I wasn't too crazy about the food, but the amazing temperature is worth it.

5.) Mexico: It's hot. If you don't mind the touristy over-load, go for it! if you like to party, I hear Tijuana is the place for that!

5 Movies I recommend seeing (AKA 5 of my favorites):

1.) Reservoir Dogs: My favorite movie. Tim Roth delivers such a punch with his heart wrenching performance (and hey, he's just plain HOT). The dialogue in this film is to die for, and the story is very engrossing.

2.) King Kong (2005): Also my favorite movie. It's so epic, and done my a master director. It's a real adventure with a bunch of sub stories and a timeless plot. ACE! (Not to mention my favorite actor had a part in this film aswell...)

3.) Inglourious Basterds: My 3d favorite movie! Again, Quentin Tarantino's directing is sublime, and the dialogue is intense! The use of multiple languages makes it that much richer! The WW2 thing just totally bought me. Five Stars!

4.) Ferris Bueller's Day Off: This one is always funny! "Twist and shout!" If you haven't seen this movie yet, go to the local BlockBuster and Rent it! It's amazing. SAVE FERRIS!

5.) The Never Ending Story: I saw this when I was 6 or 7, and the antagonist has been haunting my nightmares since then (yea, to this day i wake up screaming). It's a children's movie, but the story is chilling and amazing. I just love it! Must have seen it 20 times.

5 Books I recommend reading (AKA 5 of my favorites):

1.) Jurassic Park: No lies, I've read this at least 5 times. I just LOVE IT! Michael Crichton makes this dino story so realistic with complicated biological garble and graphs displaying UNIX computer systems. If you liked the movie and enjoy bio class, read the book.

2.) The Way The Crow Flies: I read this one a couple years ago, and it really touched me. If you can tolerate some air force talk and a disturbing plot, this may be a book for you. The father daughter relationship really spoke to me. A looong read, but so worth it.

3.) Inkheart/Inkspell: Love these books. Probably for the characters more than the somewhat cheesy plot. It's a children's book, but it has pretty mature character buisness, if you read between the lines. Plus, Basta is totally my fictional boyfriend.

4.) Prey: Another sci-fi novel by Michael Crichton. This was engrossing and chilling. It had me guessing the whole time. A real page turner! I'd recommend it to the geek that likes creepy science fictions!

5.) The Web: This is an Alex Delaware Novel written by Johnathan Kellerman. I haven't quite finished it yet (I have like, 20 pages to go) but it's totally awesome and creepy so far! It's a murder mystery and a real treat! Easy to get into.

5 things I love:

1.) WWII: The history is just so amazing! The appeal is so great to me... I watch every WWII movie i can get, I read the books, and I just can't get enough!

2.) Languages: I speak fluent french, and I know some Spanish and German. I know a line + a few words in Russian, and a couple words in Italian. All in all, Languages as AWESOME and I recommend you learn as many as you can!

3.) Horseback Riding: I love my horse, he's such an angel. There's no better feeling than connecting with that animal as you gallop across a field, jump over a 4 foot fence, or swim together in a lake. It's an amazing connection!

4.) Flying: Airplanes and Helicopters are amazing! I've flown in many helicopters and airplanes, and I just love the feeling! The appeal behind those aircrafts is unexplainable. Love!

5.) Partying. I think my neighbors want to kill me after that epic dance party I had in my living room September long weekend. Europeans know how to party, let me tell you that!

5 things I hate:

1.) Miley Cyrus: Yeuch. She disgusts me. She thinks she's so badass and all, but really she's just an ugly slut doomed to end up like Lindsay Lohan or whatever.

2.) Those creepy rapist type guys that won't stop touching me at the club: BLECH!!! You know the type. The ones that pretend to "trip" into you, accidentally grabbing your boob as they spill vodka on your blouse while saying "Sorry- well helloooo there!"

3.) Math: I HATE MATH. It makes me want to swallow an entire bottle of T3's and never wake up again. Math is a cruel, cruel creature that's sole purpose on this planet is to make me feel suicidal and stupid. Math is a bitch. It's the only thing separating me from a career as a pilot.

4.) Sluts: If you're a slut, would you please kick yourself in the face. Buy a turtle neck and save some men for the rest of us, eh? Thank you!

5.) Little kids that think they're adults: I'm sorry, but 11 year olds shouldn't wear pushup bras and have more sexual experiance than my aunt. And 16 year olds shouldn't act like jailbait. Wait your turn, children. Your time will come. Now enjoy crayons and cupcakes while you still can!

5 movies you should never waste your time watching:

1.) Caveman: Kay, they don't even speak English in this shitty movie. It's pure AWFUL.

2.) Inkeart: Great Book. Terrible movie. Their choice of actor for Basta was just plain depressing. I attempted suicide after I saw Jamie Foreman's ugly mug appear on screen. You? Basta? I don't think so! slit slit slit.

3.) Overboard: Kurt Russel and Goldie Hawn or something. I don't even know. The movie was so bad... I couldn't even finish it.

4.) Paul's case: Uhhg. I don't even know what version my highschool ELA teacher forced us to watch, but it was B-A-D BAD! I could have filmed a better movie with my grandpa's cellphone camera, a costume box from the 80's, and a chihauha as my leading lady.

5.) Wolfman: Benicio Del Toro is NOT (i repeat: NOT) a babe. he's not even remotely attractive. Watching him fumble about on screen for 2 hours turning into a gorilla like "werewolf" was just awful. I think i was drooling (from brain damage) by the end of the film. Waste of time!

Inkheart fans (Or Inkhearties as I would say): I have a confession to make: I HAVE NEVER READ INKDEATH, NOR DO I INTEND TO.

There. It's out. I've been an Inkheart fan 4 years, and I still haven't read the last book in the trilogy. You know why? You can't have Inkheart without Basta. Sorry. It's just not worth my while if my peppermint chewing, knife wielding babe isn't there.

Thank you for visiting my profile, and thank you for reading my stories! :)

Please review, but no flames, thank you very much! :D

~Hielo, Limon, Coca-Cola, Bacardi!~