There are three kinds of people in this world:
The ones who wait for things to happen,
The ones who make things happen
And the ones who wonder what the hell happened.

Put
███ This
████ On
█████ Your
██████ Page If
███████ You
████████ Have
██████████ Ever
███████████ Fallen
█████████████ Down The stairs

i am 116% mentally ill!!

take the mentally ill test!

Check the boxes next to the facts that happened to you.
- You don't have to add explanations.
- At the end of each series, write down your total.
- When you finish all the series, count your final total and multiply it by 4.
- Name your entry like this: I am ANSWER% mentally ill.
- Tag as many people as you want.

[x] You have screamed at an inanimate object for "hurting you".
[x] You have ran into a glass/screen door.
[x] You have jumped out of a moving vehicle. (does it still count if it was slowing down?)
[x] You have thought of something funny and laughed, then people gave you weird looks.
[x] You have run into a tree/bush.
[ ] You have been called a blonde. (cuz i am. DUH)
Total: 5

[x] You know that it IS possible to lick your elbow.
[x] You just tried to lick your elbow.
[x] You never knew that the "Alphabet Song" and "Twinkle LittleStar" had the same melody.
[x] You just sang them to make sure.
[x] You have tripped on your own feet and fallen.
[x] You have choked on your own spit.
Total: 6

[ ] You have seen the matrix and still don't get it.
[x] You type with 3 fingers or less.
[x] You have accidentally caught something on fire.
[x] You tried to drink out of a straw, but it went into your nose.
[x] You have caught yourself drooling.
Total: 4

[x] You have fallen asleep in class.(during reading haha)
[x] Sometimes you just stop thinking.
[x] Sometimes when you are telling a story you forget what you are talking about.
[x] People often shake their heads and walk away from you.
[ ] You are often told to use your "inside voice" (um no?)
Total: 4

[x] You use your fingers to do simple math.
[ ] You have eaten a bug accidentally. (no...but i think one has flown in my ear once...i won't mark this, just in case it won't count...)
[x] You're taking this test when you should be doing something more important.

[x] You have put your clothes on backwards or inside out, and didn't realize it.
[x] You’ve looked all over for something that was in your hand/pocket the whole time.
Total: 4

[ ] You posted bulletins because you were scared what they say'll happen if you don't.
[x] You break a lot of things.
[x] You tilt your head when you're confused.
[x] You have fallen out of your chair before.
[x] When you're lying in bed, you try to find pictures in the texture on the ceiling.
[x] The word "Um" is used frequently.
[x] You don't know what "Um" means.

Total: 6

10 facts about me!

im accident prone and pain prone.
i laugh way too much(i think everything is funny)
i dont like hating people or having others hate me
i LUVS ANIME!
i know some chinese(hello, goodbye, numbers up to 999...i know right! its so retarded that my chinese teacher didn't teach us 1,000 )
i have the awesomest friends in the world
I LUVS my advisory
volleyball is my forte :) lacrosse is not...
"imma be imma be imma be a band geek"...by:Sarah (i play flute)
when someones saying something i immediatly cut them off by starting to sing a song about it
ex. Me: how do you not know where your going?
Friend: well i dont think abo-
Me: I DONT THINK ABOUT IT,I DONT THINK ABOUT IT!I DONT THINK THINK ABOUT IT BEING MYSELF THERE AINT A DOUBT ABOUT IT!I-
Friend: As I was Saying... i think she jus been driving me around and rou-
Me: ROUND AND ROUND! WE'RE NEVER GONNA STOP GOIN ROUND AND ROUND1 WE'LL NEVER GET WHERE WE ARE GO-
Friend:WOULD YOU STOP THAT! if you dont stop ill-
Me: DONT STOP BELIVIN'!
Friend:I really hat-
Me:I REALLY HATE YOUR ASS RIGHT NOW! I SEE YOU DRIVIN' 'ROUND TOWN WITH THE GIRL I LUV AND IM LIKE FORGET YOUUUU!
Friend:what the he-
Me:WHAAAAAAAT WHAT THE HELL, ALL I WANT IS TO MESS,AROUND,AND IIIIIIII DON"T REALLY CARE ABOUT! IF YOU LOVE ME! IF YOU HATE MEH! YOU CAN'T CHANGE ME BABY BAABY!
Friend: -_-
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~WAVY~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You know you're a writer...

-If you talk to yourself.
-If you talk to yourself about talking to yourself (i.e. ‘I wonder why I talk to myself so much?’)
-If, when you talk to yourself, you sometimes speak as if talking to another person (i.e. ‘Okay, so have you ever noticed that the word ‘deliver’ could mean removing someone’s liver?’)
-If, after uttering a profound piece of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand in awe and say, ‘Wow, this is good stuff for sugar highs!’
-If you live off of sugar and caffeine.
-If people start to notice that you tend to check your e-mail every day for a week, then suddenly disappear off the face of the planet.
-If your e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.
-If, when replying to someone else’s e-mail, you are sometimes so random that you fail to address the original message altogether.
-If you tend to collect the Bic Stics people leave lying around, kind of like picking pennies off the ground.
-If, no matter where you are in your room, you never have to so much as get up to reach a pen/pencil and paper.
-If the letters are starting to wear off on the keys of your keyboard.
-If people think you might have A.D.D.
-If you think it’d be cool to have A.D.D.
-If you start constantly talking in third person, past tense.
-If you think about making lists like this, and start giggling for no ‘apparent’ reason.
-If your friends don’t even bother to look funny at you anymore when you start giggling for no apparent reason.
-And finally, the number one way to tell if you’re a good writer: If you worship English 101.
Copy and Paste this if you're a writer.

[1] ι иєє∂ тσ тєℓℓ уσυ α ѕє¢яєт ℓσ0к αт 5
[2] тнє αиѕωєя ιѕ ℓ0σк αт 11
[3] ∂σит gєт мα∂ ℓ0σк αт 15
[4] ¢αℓм ∂σωи ∂σи'т вє мα∂ ℓ0σк αт 13
[5] fιяѕт ℓ0σк αт 2
[6] ∂σит вє тнαт αиgяу ℓ0σк αт 12
[7] ι נυѕт ωαитє∂ тσ ѕαу нι
[8] ωнαт ι ωαитє∂ тσ тєℓℓ уσυ ιѕ...тнє αиѕωєя ιѕ σи 14
[9] вє ραтιєит ℓ0σк αт 4
[10] тнιѕ ιѕ тнє ℓαѕт тιмe, ℓ0σк αт 7
[11] ι нσρє уσυ'яє иσт мα∂ ωнєи ι ѕαу тнιѕ ℓ0σк αт 6
[12] ѕσяяу ℓ0σк αт 8
[13] ∂σи'т gєт мα∂ ℓ0σк αт 10
[14] ι ∂σит киσω нσω тσ ѕαу тнιѕ ℓ0σк αт 3
[15] уσυ мυѕт вє яєαℓℓℓℓℓℓу мα∂ ℓ0σк αт иυмвєя 4

Add this to you profile if you you think it's funny:

Father:"Your in big trouble miss.!"
Child: "I Didn't do anything
Father: "YOU KICKED HIM!"
Child: "It was an accident!"
Father:"In The Face..."
Child: "My foot slipped.."
Father: "Five times?!"
Child: ...

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas thought slpeling was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!--If you could read that put it in your profile.

Hi! welcome to my profile :)

Things about me:
NO offense to people but i hate yaoi
Favorite colors: Purple,black,gray,andwhite
I love epic moments when characters are in the middle of a battle!!!!!!
I love the puns in dragon ball, Z,and GT on the Son Family and Briefs Family's names!!!!
I am a Seddie worshipper
I think the Abercrombie and Fitch Model isnt that hot
I love Black and Yellow Things,BLACK Fedoras(not the gayish white ones)*im not racist i just like the color* and beanies, Emergency Bowties(inside joke srry) my colorful assortment skinny jeans :) (blue,purple,yellow,red,black,grey and many more) aeropostale(sweatpants can only do so much over the weekends) I only like school for hanging out at lunch and having nice subsitutes during Keyboarding class(learning how to type on a computer keyboard...waste of time right?),flip flops, and Soccer, Gymnastics, Basketball,Swimming,Volleyball are my fave sports.

Favorite Anime Characters: Soul Eater: Soul,Maka(I love her MAKA CHOPS, and how EPIC she looked in the last episode of the anime!!!!!), Tsubaki,Patty(her craziness is contagious), Liz, Kid(his OCD makes him so freakin cute!), Black Star(you cant not love him)
Dragon Ball,Z,GT: Goten and Trunks(Chibi form) I literally like scream tryin to describe how cute they are!!!!!!, Gohan from cell saga(SO EPIC!haha KAAHHMEEHHHAAMEEEHHAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!)(i also love his original move...MAASSEENNNKOOO HAAAAAAAA!, ChiChi and her frying pan, Bulma's Smartness, Pan from Z and GT(i loved the last episode in Dragon Ball Z when Pan ended up winning against Goten :D), Vegeta (his hatred toward the Sons and his manly pink shirt),Last But NOT LEAST! GOKU SON!!!!!!!!(funny nice and just so awesome XXD him and his goofiness lol)
Kenichi: Kenichi of course!, Takeda, Hermit(Tanimoto)...(3 of the hottest guys ever!), Honoka,Apachai and Shigure!(i love when they play othello with honoka), Akisame(i do not have an old man fetish though o.O)
Eden of the East: Takizawa(He would've Been an Awesome King), Saki, and Hirasawa
Black Butler:Ciel( i love when he dresses like a girl and almost bitchh slapps that doctor) and Finnian( hes like another Haninozuka)
Negima:Negi and Kotaro(they are just sooo kawaiiii!!!), Kaede,Fei Ku,Setsuna and Asuna(kick butt characters XD),Fate doesnt seem that evil as the manga goes on... hes kinda cute :3)
Full Metal Panic:Souske (has got to be like the awesomest person ever!) Kaname(how she's the only one who can handle souske and cause the military war freak pain :) )Kurtz weber(hes actually on the cute side other than being a hentai), Melissa Mao(how she always seems to keep Kurtz in check)
OHSHC:Tamaki(host club charm'with the SPARKLES!')Hikaru and Kaoru(finding ways to annoy Tamaki and suck up to haruhi), Kyouya(SHADOW KING!hes pretty cool with the evil look in his eyes )Mori and Honey(again...Kawaiiii!!!!), Haruhi(just too awesome, i mean i wanna be her! hanging out with 6 hott highshool guys al the time...lucky bitch ;) )
and Last but Not Least Avatar the Last Air Bender: Aang and Zuko( i love em in the cartoon)Momo and Sokka(cactus juice!) Toph (another Kickass character)
I despised the movie though!!!!! i mean what is up with AHHHNNGG! i mean it was aang like 2 years ago wasn't it?(help me out here on this one!) zuko's scar wasn't as zuko like and everyone was seriously out of character. the only person who looked like they were supposed to was Aang sorta(or AHNG being the original term i guess). and the movie was to dramatic looking and not funny like the cartoon.
LIKE EVERY EFFIN' CHARACTER IN POKEMON!(AAML worshipper)

Sarah, Ashely,Emma S,Maddie, Matty, Jake ,Jeff,Thomas(funniest acts like a gay guy friend evur), Emma , Micheala, "Will I Am" look Alike kid(thts what everyone likes to call him), Syd,Erin,Caylee,Abby,Sabrina, Asia, Brandon,Tracy, V.V (for short),Hannah and "HomeDogZ"(twins) India, ,Cat and Fran(more twinns :D), Evan(extendo d*ck! hes so random its funny), Bobby, Matt and wayyy more peopless.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~WAVES~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD the ones you are.)
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists
I’m into THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual
I'm a GIRL, so I MUST be WEAK.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.(this one really pisses me off since im Black)
I’m BI, so I MUST think every girl I see is hot
I’m a BOHEMIAN, so I MUST be a lazy drug addict
I LOVE ANIMALS, so I MUST be a vegetarian
I’m a TREEHUGGER, so I MUST be a drug addicted hippie
I’m INTO JIM HENDRIX, so I MUST be on drugs
I’m a MUSICIAN, so I MUST not be doing anything with my life
I have GOOD GRADES, so I MUST be a nerd or suck-up
I have GREEN SKIN, so I MUST be a wicked witch
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a stupid ditz
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I’m a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly or crazy
I live(d) in the COUNTRY, so I MUST (have) live(d) on a farm.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be goth
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I’m YOUNG, so I MUST be naive
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I’m SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash
I’m DIFFERENT, so I MUST just want attention
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I’m WICCAN, so I MUST be a devil-worshipping baby killer.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I SUCK MY OWN BLOOD FROM WOUNDS, so I MUST have a vampire fetish
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I’m a good actor/actress, so I MUST be a liar
I’m an ACTOR/ACTRESS, so I MUST be mean
I’m THIN, so I MUST have an eating disorder
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore with a jock boyfriend
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I’m AMERICAN, so I MUST be an overweight pig with no boundaries
I'm a BLACK BELT, so I MUST always want to kick someone's ass

I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I’m a CHRISTIAN, so I MUST hear crazy God voices in my head
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have big boobs, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and that’s how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO
I’m a GIRL, so I MUST suck at all guy sports
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy
I like CATS, so I WILL grow up to be a crazy old cat lady who lives alone
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas
I’m a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction
I’m a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude
I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm a FEMALE, so I MUST not SWEAR.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a FEMALE BLACK BELT, so I MUST be a lesbian.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I LIKE TO BE MYSELF, so I MUST be cocky and arrogant
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE, So I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT,so I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion (although I myself really AM against abortion. those poor little babies don't deserve to be murdered! T.T and they can FEEL it too...)
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST. (some of it, anyway.)
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I wear BLACK nailpolish, so I MUST be EMO, GOTH, or PUNK
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I an friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.
I am an HONOR STUDENT, so I MUST be a NERD.
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, them burst into tears at one mistake
I DON'T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems
I can't help but BLUSH when I'm around a cute guy so I MUST be a dumb slut
I'm good at SINGING so I MUST need attention
I'm QUIET so I MUST be stuck-up
I sit ALONE at lunch so I MUST be snobbish
I still have SLEEPOVERS with my female friends so I MUST be lesbian
I'm HARD TO FIGURE OUT so I MUST be impossible to get along with
I sometimes say I LOVE MY FRIENDS so I MUST be gay/lesbian
I wear MAKE-UP so I MUST be ugly
I DON'T wear make-up so I MUST be an outsider
Im AFRICAN, so I must be POOR AND WEAR RAGS AND CLOTH ALL THE TIME

If you're a chocoholic, copy and paste this onto your profile

I OWE MY MOTHER

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me. "

21. My mother taught me IRONY...again.
"You son of a bitch!"

22. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

23. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like you're father."

24. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

25. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

26. My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

If you're against drug usage, copy and paste this onto your profile

98 of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 who hasn't, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you read other people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you are bored and like to write stuff, copy and paste this onto your profile

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~WEEEEEEEEEE~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cows!

Say the word 'cow' before each word:
--Cows
--About
--Talking
--Idiot
--This
--Got
--I
--Long
--How
--Look

Now say the word 'cow' after each word:
Cows--
About--
Talking--
Idiot--
This--
Got--
I--
Long--
How--
Look--

Now say the word 'cow' before and after each word:
--Cows--
--About--
--Talking--
--Idiot--
--This--
--Got--
--I--
--Long--
--How--
--Look-

Now read from the bottom up:
Cows
About
Talking
Idiot
This
Got
I
Long
How
Look

If you've ever asked a really stupid and obvious question, copy and paste this onto your profile

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.

Its always in the last place you look...of course it is, why the heck would you keep looking after I found it?

Silence is golden, duct tape is silver.

Boys are like trees, they take 50 years to grow up.

Friends will always be like "Well, you deserve better!" but best friends will prank call him saying "You will die in seven days!"

A friend will comfort you when he rejects you, but a best friend will go up to him and say "Its because your gay isn't it?"

When your are in jail a friend will bail you out, but a best friend will be sitting right next to you saying "dang that was fun!"

There cannot be a crisis this week; my schedule is filled.

Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door.

One day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject.

Go ahead and call the cops! I'll order pizza and we'll see who gets here first!

There are three kinds of people: those who can count, and those who can't.

Life isn't passing me by, its trying to run me over.

Boys are like slinkeys, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.

I went to a fight and a hockey game broke out.

People say "Guns don't kill people, People kill people!" Well, I think guns help. If you stood there and yelled Bang, I don't think you'd kill too many people.

Cheer up, the worst is yet to come.

I'm not crazy. My reality is just different then yours.

Trust me, I'm a ninja.

Pac-Man ghosts: the first stalkers.

Facebook: because MySpace has too many stalkers.

I was about to take over the world, but I got distracted when I saw something shiny.

ADHD is Attention Deficit Hyper-ooh look! Butterfly!

364 days of the year, parents tell their kids not to take candy from strangers, yet on Halloween, its encouraged! Why is that?

You're a speacial kind of stupid aren't you?

The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not.

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

I was just kidding. There is no candy.

Be insane... because well behaved girls never made history.

Most people learn by observation, and there are the few who learn by experimentation. And then there are those who actually TOUCH the fire to see if it's really hot.

Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.

Secret admirers are stalkers with stationary.

One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh,he just took a wrong turn,got lost,and is to stubborn to ask directions.

When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it.

So what if we act like imature idiots? We're having fun.

Where does life get all these lemons?

Death is life's way of telling you you're fired.

Unless life gives you water and sugar with those lemons, your lemonade's gonna suck.

I'm not afraid to die. I just don't want to be there when it happens.

If your parents never had children, chances are you won't either.

The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense.

There are 3 rules for writing a novel. Unfortunately no one knows what they are.

When life gives you lemons, throw them at hobos.

Experts say you should never hit your child in anger. When's a good time? When you're feeling festive?

When children are doing nothing, they're doing mischief.

It's not 'If you break it, you buy it.' It's 'I break it, I run.'

When life gives you lemons, go find a kid with a papercut and make his life miserable.

When life gives you lemons, throw them back and demand Coke!

Everything is funny as long as it's happening to someone else.

Why do we teach kids that violence is not the answer and then have them read about wars in school that solved America's problems?

I like work. It fasinates me. I can sit and stare at it for hours.

A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice.

You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.

You can twist my my words into lies. You can change my appearance so I don't recognize myself when I look in a mirror. You can posion my mind with your malicious thoughts. But no matter what, you can't bend my will. You can't change who I am.

If it weren't for physics and law enforcement, I'd be unstoppable.

Don't mess with me - I've got a stick.

We're not retreating...we are simply advancing in another direction.

Never do anything you wouldn't want to explain to the paramedics.

Flying is simple. You just throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Most people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them.

It’s not cheating unless you get caught.

When I was born I was so surprised I didn’t talk for a year and a half.

Life is like a taxi. The meter just keeps a-ticking whether you are getting somewhere or just standing still.

The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame.

Time is a great teacher, unfortunately it kills all its pupils.

Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.

When I die, I want to go peacefully in my sleep like my Grandfather did, not screaming like the passengers in his car.

Hard work never killed anyone, but why take the chance?

WAKE UP IN THE MORNING FEELING. . .like going back to sleep.

I never know what to do when a fat person says, "I'm fat."

I wonder if P. Diddy ever wakes up feeling like Ke$ha?

Sorry Ke$ha, I don't know how to pronounce the dollar sign.

*wakes up in middle of night, looks at clock* Yes! I still have time to sleep!

When summer comes, my life gets a whole lot better.

Kid: "I'm bored!" Mom: "Why don't you clean your room?" Kid: "Oh look. Computer."

If you tickle me I'm not responsible for your injuries.

I'm smiling because they haven't found the bodies yet.

I watched PG-13 movies when I was 12 without my parents. OOH! REBEL!

I would carry you to the moon and back. Joking. You're fat and I'd die.

ROFL!!!. . .Joking, I'm still in my chair.

Yes, I'm a teenager. No, I'm not pregnant, high, or about to steal your stuff.

There's plenty of fish in the sea. Just kidding. There's an oil spill.

I'm so good at sleep, I can do it with my eyes closed.

I don't stalk, I observe.

ALL YOU NEED IS LOVE!. . . Oxygen helps too.

I'd take a bullet for you. Not in the head, like in the leg or something.

Worst. Idea. Ever. [pause] Let's do it.

People who investigate noises in horror movies deserve to die.

It's better to have loved and lost than to live with the physco for the rest of your life.

I've probably learned more from Google than I have from school.

I laugh at the GUYS that work at Subway because they have to make me a sandwhich.

If a guy says you're "hot" he's looking at your body. If he says you're "pretty" he's looking at your face. If he says you're "beautiful" he's looking at your soul :)

Frozen computer. Maybe if I click EVERYWHERE it will work again.

When I was little "I will tell your mother" was the biggest comeback ever.

I'm not easily distr. . .OMG! SHINY!

Anyone ever notice that studying is like putting student and dying together.

TEXTING + FACEBOOK = TEXTBOOK See? I'm studying.

I'm not weird, I'm limited edition.

It takes skill to trip over a flat surface. I have that skill.

"I'm a ninja." "No you're not." "Did you see that?" "See what?" "Exactly."

"Can I go to the bathroom?" "I don't know, can you?" ". . .I will pee on your floor."

For the people who don't know me, they think I'm quiet. For the people who do know me, they wish I was.

They're called skinny jeans, NOT make you skinny jeans.

*smash* Mom: What was that? Me: . . .Nothing. . .

Going to church doesn't make you a christian anymore than being in a garage makes you a car.

Hi spider, nice spider, let me pet you with my shoe. . .good spider.

Alone in the house, hear a noise, suddenly think you're going to be killed.

Move out of the way children. I've been waiting 11 years to see Toy Story 3.

Facebook is the only place where it's acceptable to talk to a wall.

Paper beats rock? Ok. I'll throw a rock at you and you defend yourself with paper.

FRIENDS/BEST FRIENDS

FRIENDS: Will comfort you when he rejects you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "You will die in seven days..."

FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall.

BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumbass?"

FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince.

BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you.

FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.

BEST FRIENDS: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!"

FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda.

BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you.

FRIENDS: Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month.

BEST FRIENDS: Will throw you a tampon and push you in.

FRIENDS: Gives you their umbrella in the rain.

BEST FRIENDS: Takes yours and says, "Run - bitch - run!"

FRIENDS: Will help you move.

BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies.

FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be in the room next to you saying"DAANG THAT WAS FUUN! FUCK DAT DIPSHIT!"

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.

BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.

BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "DANG!" we messed up!

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.

BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.

BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.

BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.

BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.

BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds butt that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.

BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.

BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college.

BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.

BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Girl drink the rest of that ! You know we don't waste!

FRIENDS: Would read ignore this.

BEST FRIENDS: Will repost this crap!

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: danyan, Zutara Lover, Black'n'red'Butterfly, Enrica, twilightgirl1918, Just A Little Bit Dramatic, Pirates OWNS you, Cripsee, I'll have some stupid cliche, Insane Winged Girl, MysticalPearl,MaxWing,sk8rchickmax,Blackwingsrainbowtips, MyNameIsCAL,Fangtastic, Techno Skittles,SoulForChibiGotenks13.

If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word, And you do so at random moments; copy and paste this in you're profile

If you wish that you could fly so much it hurts, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever imagined killing off a fictional character to steal her fictional boyfriend, copy this in your profile

If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think the human identification thing when you log in to fan fiction is annoying, copy and past this into your profile.

If you've ever acted like a paranoid fool because you believe that fictional characters exist, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you solemnly swear you are up to no good copy and paste this into your profile

If you have a very wide range of interests, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever fallen down the stairs copy this on your profile

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this on your profile

If you have ever pushed on a door that says pull or vice versa copy and paste this on your profile

If you have a very wide range of interests copy and paste this on your profile

If there are times you just want to annoy people for the heck of it, copy and paste this on your profile

92 percent of the teenage population would be dead if Ambercrombie and Bitch-er I mean Fitch said it wasn't cool to breathe anymore. Put this on your profile if you are one of the 8 percent who would be laughing their ass off.

Weird is good. Strange is bad. Weird is the same as different which means the same as unique! Which means weird is good! If you are weird and proud of it, copy and paste this on your profile

98 percent of teenagers has or do smoke pot. If you're one of the two percent who hasn't, and never will, copy and paste this on your profile

If you believe PREPS TRAVEL IN PACKS copy and paste this on your profile

If you have ever randomly broke out in a dance and didn't care who was watching, copy and paste this on your profile

If you have ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this on your profile

If you love rain, copy and past this on your profile

If you love snow, copy and paste this on your profile

If you hate those obnoxious snobby people PLEASE copy and paste this to your profile

If you’ve been on the computer for hours on end reading multiple fanfictions copy and paste this on your profile

If you have insanely annoying siblings copy and paste this on your profile

If you like being utterly random copy and paste this on your profile

If you have ever laughed so hard you either choked, hyperventilated, had your sides cramp, or all of the above copy and paste this on your profile

If you have ever run into a door, copy this onto your profile

If you are obsessive with all of your anime stuff (if someone else touches it they die kinda obsessive) copy this into your profile

If you think those stupid kids should give that Godforsaken rabbit some Trix, copy and paste this on your profile

If you have ever tripped on your own feet copy and paste this on your profile

If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, copy and paste this on your profile

For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laughs when someone asks you just what you find so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour long sob fest, then start singing and dancing when your favorite song plays. Crazy is when you do or say a totally random thing like, "do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or having a thumb war with yourself. (I find myself a very tough opponent). So if you're crazy, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you have ever had an argument with yourself and LOST, copy and paste this on you profile.

If you have ever zoned out for five consecutive minutes copy this on your profile

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this on your profile

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say right before you were going to say it copy this on your profile

If you have ever slapped yourself and/or banged your head against a desk for no reason copy this on your profile

If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the conversation copy this on your profile

If you hate those mosquitoes giving you mosquito bites, copy and paste this on your profile

If you have been hit in the face with a ball and started laughing copy this on your profile
(so many times!)

If you have ever crashed into a wall while sugar high copy and paste this on your profile

If you have ever tried to make plans for world domination put this on your profile

If, with no warning, laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, copy this on your profile

If you have ever thrown something at a TV screen when you saw a character you despised, copy and paste this on your profile

If your profile is long, copy this onto it to make it even longer

If you have ever copy and pasted something copy and paste this onto your profile

If you are obsessed with BBxRae couple copy this into your profile

If you hate the RobxRae couple copy this into your profile

Anime is Life. Manga is life. Life is good. Parents suck for not buying you more life. If you agree, copy and paste this to your profile.

95% of teens would cry if they saw EDWARD CULLEN at the top of a skyscraper about to jump. Put this as part of your sig if you are part of the 5% that would sit here with popcorn & a camera and yell "DO A FLIP!!!"

When life gives you lemons, call him a pervert and ask if he reads fanfiction.

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile

If you ran up a down escalator copy this into your profile

If you're easily confused or confuzzled add this to you're profile

If you want to learn Japanese, copy/paste this into your profile

If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could have clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you think that writing Fanfic stories is fun then copy this onto your profile!

If you have ever tripped where there is a WATCH YOUR STEP SIGN, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever fallen off a chair backwards, copy and paste this in your profile.

If there are times when you just wanna annoy people for the heck of it then copy this into ya profile.

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have an annoying younger--or older-- sibling, please copy and paste this into your profile

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If your friends are WEIRD (But not as weird as you) put this on your profile.

If your parents have ever told you that you weren't normal, and are proud of it copy this to your profile. (This is honestly a daily conversation subject for us)

If you think that life without computers is useless then copy this into your profile.

If you don't watch Laguna Beach or the O.C. or The Hills religiously, never have, never will, and are proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you were insane, crazy, and/or random, before being crazy, insane, and/or random was cool, copy and paste this into your profile

If you like/love copying and pasting stuff into your profile, copy and paste this into your profi

A large percent of authors do not know the difference between 'your' and 'you're'. If you do know the difference, copy and paste this to your profile

If you've ever been so obsessed with a tv or Movie character that you scare everyone who knows you, join the club, and copy and paste this to your profile

I prefer solitude over company. Copy and paste this in your profile you have the same feeling.

If you eat carbs and are proud, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever spent more than six hours on FanFiction copy and paste this into your profile.

If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, copy this to your profile

If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this onto your profile

I don't suffer from insanity... I enjoy every minute of it. If you are insane, enjoying every second, and proud of it, copy this and paste it into your profile

If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile

If someone actually thinks that you are evil and/or plotting their death, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tried to make plans for world domination, copy and paste here.

If you are obsessed with something considered childish for someone your age, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever sat in a class and poked the person in front of you just for fun, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever slapped yourself and/or banged your head on a table for no reason copy and paste this onto your profile

If you love rain, copy and past this on your profile

If you've been on the computer for hours on end reading multiple fanfictions copy and paste this on your profile

If you like being utterly random copy and paste this on your profile

if you have ever been hit by a parked car copy and paste this into your profile.

if your right mind has ever had a fight with ur left mind copy it into your profile

if you have an evil monkey in your closet add this to your profile

If you listen to and talk back to the voices in your head and find nothing wrong with it because you know they're there, put this in your profile.

If you know the answer to the riddle, it is so confusing when you are trying to confuse someone you end up confusing yourself therefore you succeed in your task of confusing the person you were trying to confuse because you are less confused than the person you were trying to confuse, copy this into your profile.

If you think i wrote that last one...you're crazy i didn't but copy this into your profile anyway

if you have crazy psychopathic dreams of world domination join me and copy this into your profile

If you think that I'm making you think too much, copy this to your profile.

If your obsessed with fan fiction, copy this to your profile.

If you're wondering why your profile hasn't exploded from all of the crap you've put on it, copy this to your profile to see if it will explode this time.

If you get easily distracted copy and pas-- Oh look! A butterfly!

If several inanimate objects hate you copy and paste this into your profile.

If you hear voices of the characters in your head...copy and paste this on your profile.

I'm bored...If you're bored then paste this in your profile and let the world know you have nothing to do...

If you've ever tripped on a chair, copy this to your profile.

If you've ever fallen off your chair, put this in your profile.

If you hang out with the guys even though you're a girl, copy and paste!

If you've ever sung a song you hated so much, copy and paste this into your profile

20 ways to maintain a healthy level of insanity:

1: At lunch time, sit in you car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars; see if they slow down

2: Page yourself over the intercom. Do not disguise your voice.

3: Every time some one asks you to do something, ask them if they want fries with that

4: Put you garbage can on your desk and label it "IN"

5: Put decaf in the coffee maker (home or work). When everyone gets over their caffeine addiction, switch to espresso

6: In your memo book, on all your checks, put "FOR SMUGGLING DIAMONDS"

7: Finish all your sentences with "In Accordance To The Prophecy"

8: Dont use any punctuation

9: As often as possible, skip instead of walking

10: Order diet water whenever you go out with a serious face

11: Specify that your drive-thru order is "TO GO"

12: Sing along at the opera

13: Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme

14: Put mosquito netting around your work area (or room) and play tropical sounds all day

15: 5 days in advance, tell your friend that you can't go to their party cause you don't 'feel like it'

16: Have friends or coworkers address you by your wrestling name "Rock Bottom"

17: When the cash comes out of the ATM yell, "I WON, I WON"

18: When exiting the zoo, start running toward the parking lot, yelling, "Run for your lives they're loose"

19: Tell your children (or younger siblings) that "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go"

20: And the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity is... Copy this and put it on your profile!

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile

If you ever threatened a computer or video game console, add this to your profile.

If you have embarrassing memories that make you want to smack yourself/someone else, copy and paste into your profile

Spread the Stupidity

Only in America do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

Only in America do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

Only in America do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

Only in America do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

Only in America do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

Only in America do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'.

Only in America do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

Answering Machine Messages:

1. Hello, you've reached Jim and Sonya, We can't pick up the phone right now, because we're doing something we really enjoy. Sonya likes doing it up and down, and I like doing it left to right...really slowly. So leave a message, and when we're done brushing our teeth, we'll call you back.

2. Hi. I'm probably home, but I'm avoiding someone I don't like. Leave me a message, and if I don't get back to you, it's you.

3. Hi. Now YOU say something!

4. Hello, if you leave a message, I'll call you soon. If you leave a "sexy" message, I'll call you sooner.

5. A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why we're not here. So, leave a message.

6. Hi. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my bank, you didn't lend me enough money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. If you are a female, don't worry, I have Lots of money!!

7. Hi! John's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these plastic magnets.

8. This is not an answering machine...it's a telepathic thought-recording device. After the tone, think your name, your number, and your reason for calling...and I'll think about returning your call.

9. Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages. My owners do not need siding, windows or a tub, and their carpets are clean. They give to charity at the office and don't need their picture taken. If you're still with me, leave your name and home phone number, and they will get back with you.

10. My wife and I can't come to the phone right now, but if you'll leave your name and number, we'll get back to you as soon as we're finished.

If you are obsessive with all of your anime stuff (if someone else touches it they die kinda obsessive) copy this into your profile

If you enjoy laughing at the pain or misfortune of others copy this into your profile

If you think Rock Paper Scissors solves everything, then put this in your profile

If you've ever read/started to read a chapter in a fan fiction, got side-tracked, and forgot to review and realized it after the author posted another chapter, copy and paste this on your profile

You know your stressed out when you can hear mimes.

(On a T-Shirt) Who are you, and why are you reading my shirt?

A conclusion is what you reach when you get tired of thinking.

I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory

How you know your random:

1) If your walking down the street and bust out in song for no reason what so ever

2) If you start laughing because you finally understand the punch line from a joke someone told you thirty minutes ago and your around completely different people

3) If you ask a question that has nothing to do with your current conversation

4) If you start an argument with yourself and lose

5) When you start reciting the words to a movie thats playing and start to get on everyones nerves

6) If in the middle of a sentence you yell a random word 'TUNA' then continue your sentence

7) When you remember something funny and start laughing at the most inappropriate moments ex: church, funeral, when someone just told you they where going to die ( if this insults some people I'm sorry)

8) You start singing the 'Duck song' from Jimmy Neutron

9) You tell everyone you see that your a tumor

10) You start singing the alphabet song

11) You yell food fight in your math class then duck under your desk when people start throwing food

Annoying Things To Do On An Elevator:

1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer Inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5) MEOW occasionally.
6) STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM" - and back away slowly
7) SAY -DING at each floor.
8) SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And push all the red buttons.
9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."
11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"
12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."
14) WHEN there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
16) ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17) HOLD the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"
18) DROP a pen and wail until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"
19) BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20) PRETEND you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the Passengers.
21) SWAT at flies that don't exist.
22) CALL out "Group hug" then enforce it

If all else fails, destroy all evidence that you tried

Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse

Never argue with an idiot. They'll just drag you down to their level and beat you with experience

I'd tell you to go to hell, but I work there and really don't want to see you everyday

Even if the voices aren't real, they have some good ideas

If I had any dignity that would have been humiliating.

Sanity? I never had such a useless thing to begin with!

That which does not kill me had better run pretty dang fast.

Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back

Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.

A wise man once said, "Ask a girl."

Everybody has got to die but I have always believed an exception would be made in my case.

When in doubt, push random buttons!

Fighting is mind over matter. I don't mind, and you don't matter

There's always a light at the end of the tunnel. Of course, it's usually an oncoming express train.

Last night I was looking up at the stars when suddenly I wondered..."Dude, where the heck's my ceiling?"

Just when I think you've said the stupidest thing ever you just keep on talking

You know, you do this annoying thing where you open your mouth and then these things you call words come out. Yeah like that. Stop it

He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death.

Guns don't kill people. I kill people. . .with guns.

An idiot is a 44th floor window washer who steps back to admire his work

Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible?

Ask me no questions and I’ll tell you no lies

I'll never die. I'll just explode, right there before your eyes, onstage

A clear conscience is usually a sign of memory loss.

There are no stupid questions, just a lot of inquisitive idiots.

The secret to success is sincerity. Once you can fake that you’re good

If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk.

Hate is just a special kind of love we give to people who suck.

I used to have super powers, but then my therapist took them away.

They say the truth will set you free. Then why is it every time I tell the truth, I get sent to my room?

Love your enemies. It gets them really confused.

I'm not a complete idiot. Some parts are missing

"Hey, they just called you black." "So? I am black, what's the big deal?" "Well, I just though you'd say "Oh hell no!" and tell me to hold something." "Why in the hell would I do that?" "I dunno, just. . ."

Student: "My leg hurts." Nurse: "Is it broken?" Student: "No." Nurse: "Then it doesn't hurt." Student: WTF?????

Doctor: "Have you had cancer before?" Patient: "No." Doctor: "Then you can't have cancer now."
I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.

Holy mother fucking shit!

I WILL SMACK A BITCH!!!

My clothes seemed to have disappeared.

"Wanna play rape?" "Ummmm. . . .no." "That's the spirit!!"

Soul Eater Quotes That I Love

"If we die, we die cool." - Soul, Ep. 5

"Maka Chop!" - Maka, a continuous thing

"Try not to die." - Maka & Soul, Ep. 22

pause* "How can I shut my mouth and lead the way?"
"I don't know. Point or something you stupid freak." -Soul and the Little Demon, Ep. 20 (the pause is what really made me laugh)

"All gone." -Maka as a kid, Ep. 21

"GODDAMN!! SHIT!!" - Free, Ep. 13, English Sub

"Gaoooooow!" - Maka as a kid, Ep. 21, English Sub

"Oh. That's too bad. Sensing souls is the only thing you're half decent at."
"You really know how to piss me off!" - Black*Star and Maka, Ep. 19

"I thought you said that you were fine with me just reading a book. That's the only reason I agreed to come anyway."
"Yeah, well, I lied. *gets hit in face with a book*" -Maka and Black*Star, Ep. 25

"Uh, dude? Is there something wrong with you?" - Soul, Ep. 6

"Patty, why don't you tell him in that special way of yours?"
"Okay. *cute shuffling then really creepy face* GET YOUR ASS MOVING NOW, DAMN YOU!" - Liz and Patty, Ep. 21 (or maybe it was 22)

That entire freaking scene at the end of Episode 8 when they're in the hospital. xD

THE LITTLE BWOOMERS AGAINN!!! Spirit demonstrates repetition...

Quotes from friends:

ITS RAININ CRACK! ALLELUJA ITS RAININ CRACK! - song by Sarah!!

suck my DIC(teacher walks by)...tionary- Sydney

(in the locker room) AHHH Im SO FAT!(sydney)... Dude...you look anorexic(Emily)

YOUR GUY SIDE:

You love hoodies. (Ya!! Especially when I pull up the hood and look mysterious! lol!! Plus, who doesn't?)
You love jeans. (My #1 choice in pants)
Dogs are better than cats
It's hilarious when people get hurt. (YES!! Especially if I'm the one who caused it)
You've played with/against boys on a team. (Hasn't everyone?)
Shopping is torture. (No! Shopping's cool!)
Sad movies suck.
You own/ed an X-Box.
Played with Hotwheel cars as a kid.
At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter. (Eh...not really! lol!! I like STARTING fires not putting them out! :P )
You own/ed a DS, PS2 or Sega. (I have a PS2 in my room which I'm about to play with. And I had a DS. Sega was THE SHIT!)
You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers.
You watch sports on TV. (no i like playing sports better)
You love video games. (They rock. Nuff said)
Guitar Hero/Rock Band rule! (One of my fav games)
Gory movies are cool. (i really dont care too much about em)its kinda lame 'specially since you know its all fake
Dragonball,Z and GT are some of the best tv series EVER (idk why people always hate GT! I thought it was good)
You were a little dissaponted there wasn't a Dragon Ball AF(i really wish there couldve been more,Dragon Ball Series was Freakin AWESOME!!!)

You go to your dad for advice.
You own like a trillion baseball caps. (i gots a few)
You like going to high school football games. (I hate football)
You used to collect YU GI YOH or pokemon cards when you were younger(um no duh!)

Baggy pants are cool to wear.
It's kinda weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people. (Why would it be?)
Green, black, red, blue, or silver are one of your favorite colors. (Black, red, and black and silver!)
You love to go crazy and not care what people think. (That's got me written all over it)
Sports are fun. (I like swimming and volleyball! soccer and basketball are pretty beast too)
Talk with food in your mouth. (Keep it shut! It aint 'Show and Tell!')
Sleep with your socks on at night.(not usually)

Total:19

YOUR GIRL SIDE:

You wear lip gloss/stick. (lipgloss everyday! i hate lipstick)
You love to shop. (Duh! for Video games!)
You wear eyeliner. (Nah. It's difficult to put on and pretty annoying)
You wear the color pink. (Not really)
Go to your mom for advice.(Hell no! shes pretty useless sometimes and can be pretty annoying but i still love her)
You consider cheerleading a sport. (No. I don't in fact)
You hate wearing the color black. (ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? THAT'S MY FAV COLOR TO WEAR!)
Video games are boring. (*GASP!*HOW COULD YOU SAY THAT!? FOORR SHHAAAMMEEE)
Rock Band/Guitar Hero are a waste of time. (NO THEY'RE NOT!!! IN FACT THEY KILL TIME!! I DO IT WHENEVER I'M BORED!)
You like hanging out at the mall. (I just love the mall. Feels nice to be with friends)
You like getting manicures and/or pedicures. (I dont have time for that petty stuff)
You like wearing jewelry. (bracelets and anklets! earrings arent my thing anymore and necklaces get in the way durin gym)
Skirts are a big part of your wardrobe. (Ewwww! I hate them as much as I hate dresses! )
Shopping is one of your favorite hobbies. (How many times will this questions be asked?)
You don't like the movie Star Wars. (GASP AGAIN! no one speaks of R2-D2 in vain! i luv Star Wars XD)
You were in gymnastics/dance. (about 10 years)
It takes you around/ more one hour to shower, get dressed, and make-up. ( it takes me like an hour to shower!and i hate make up...cept foundation )
You smile a lot more than you should. (other people always notice)
You care about what you look like. (You have to have a decent appearance)
You like wearing dresses when you can.(NO)
You like wearing body spray/perfume/cologne. (no not anymore)

You love the movies. (Who doesn't? They're awesome!)
Used to play with dolls as little kid. (I loved Barbies)
Like putting make-up on someone else for the heck of it. (YES!!! esspecially during sleepovers and theres nothhing else to do)Like being right(who doesnt?)
You Laugh alot( Holy MoFo! i laugh 24/7! people always say i laugh too much)

Total: 15 (im more of guy growing up with 3 brothers and no sisters but whatev! I like being tomboyish better)

Favorite anime/mangas/movies(in no specific order,just what i thought of off the top of my head)

Soul Eater
Ouran High School Host Club XD
History's Strongest Disciple Kenichi
Mahou Sensei Negima
Soul Eater Not
Negima!?(and the OVAs)
Eden of the East series
Eden of the East movie 1for these 3 Eden of the East i like Cried and the ends :'''( it was sad to me how
Eden of the East Paradise Lost they didn't get together :( SakiTaki4evur
Solty Rei
Black Butler
Full Metal Panic(Fummoffu and Second Raid too)
Hetalia Axis Powers
Naruto
El Cazador De La Bruja
Avatar the Last Air Bender
Birdy the Mighty Decode
Dragon Ball
Dragon Ball Z
Dragon Ball GT
Claymore(its ok)
Digimon
Deltora Quest(i like the book series.. ALL THREE SERIES BABAY!)
Bamboo Blade
Inyuasha
Wolf and Spice
Jyu Oh Sei
One Piece
Origin Spirits of the Past
Peach Girl(i liked it when i was younger)
Pokemon
Samurai Jack
School Rumble
Shaman King(i still remember the theme song SHAAAAMMMAAAAN KIIIINNNNGGGG)
Tales of Symphonia
The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya
YU GI OH
Zatch Bell
Nabari No Ou

AND LASTLY MY SHIPPPINGS:
Soul Eater:SoMa(SoulxMaka), TsuBlacki(TsubakixBlack*Star)
Pokemon: AshxMisty, DawnxKenny, DawnxPaul, MayxDrew
Nabari:RaimeixAizawa, MiharuxRaimei
Tales of Symphonia:LlyodxCollete
Deltora Quest:JasminexLeif
Birdy the Mighty:TsutomuxBirdy
Naruto:SakuraxNaruto
Full Metal Panic:Souskexkaname
El Cazador: L.AxEllis
Avatar:Zutara(ZukoxKatara) Kataang(aangxkatara)
Eden:TakizawaxSaki (SakiTaki)
Negima: NegixAsuna, KotaroxNatsumi and more...just too lazy to put em up

I hopee you likee some of my worshipped pairings!

i am an Anime Freak haha well i hope you like atleast some of these( if you dont know them then look them up they're all really good :D )

I tried to make this as long as possible ;)

I think theres still summore animes though that im missing :O
Read my incomplete stories and i will finish em!

DONT FORGET TO REVIEW DAMMNIT

jk im not that sinister... but i can do the glasses thing like Kyoya :)
I even have black glasses too! and they're prescription :P

if you want to check out my deviant art page: