![]() Author has written 4 stories for Harry Potter, Tangerine, Naruto, Star Trek: 2009, and Wizards of Waverly Place. if you support the squirrel war against the evil demon chipmunks copy n paste this and be proud of what your supporting RANDOM SHIT: Girl: Do I ever cross your mind? Boy: No Girl: Do you like me? Boy: No Girl: Do you want me? Boy: No Girl: Would you cry if I left? Boy: No Girl: Would you live for me? Boy: No Girl: Would you do anything for me? Boy: No Girl: Choose--me or your life Boy: My life The girl runs away in shock and pain and the boy runs after her and says... The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind. The reason why I don't like you is because I love you. The reason I don't want you is because I need you. The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left. The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you. The reason why I'm not willing to do you anything for you is because I would do everything for you. The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life. The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away... Post this on your profile if you hate racism. Whoever said nothing is impossible, never tried to slam a revolving door. Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else. I don't suffer from insanity I enjoy every minute of it. You laugh because I'm different. I laugh because you're all the same. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid. There is stupid coming out of your mouth hole again God made man, and then he said, "I can do better than that," and made women. So many boys, so many reasons to stay alone I didn't mean to hurt your feelings...I was aiming for your face When you’re down I may not be able to pick you back up, but I promise I’ll be willing to lay down right next to you I hear your silence loud and clear Children in frontseats can lead to accidents. Accidents in backseats can lead to children. Why do today what you could put off till tomorrow? How can i miss you if you never left? Education is important, school however, is another matter. Don’t mess with me I've got a stick. Boys are like Slinky's, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs. Boys are like purses: cute, full of crap, and always replaceable Boys are like skateboards, they can go fast but usually there pretty slow. Boys are like knives, useful but they'll cut you eventually If at first you don't succeed, don't try skydiving. I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder. You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it. Evening News is where they begin with "Good Evening" then proceed to tell you why it isn't Don't follow in my footsteps, I tend to walk into walls Men are like parking spots, the good ones are taken and the free ones are handicapped. There are no stupid questions, just stupid people. Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night. Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life. If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it? Help I've fallen and i cant...hey nice carpet! A stranger stabs you in the front; a friend stabs you in the back; a boyfriend stabs you in the heart, but best friends only poke each other with straws. Whose cruel idea was it for the word "Lisp" to have a "S" in it? You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you. If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too? If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? They say hard work never hurts anybody, but why take the chance. There’s a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line. Don't take life too seriously, you won't get out alive Life is full of disappointments, and I'm full of life! Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else. Cheese… milk's leap toward immortality. Life's Tough, get a helmet The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. Can vegetarians eat Animals Crackers? Isn't it scary that doctors call what they do "practice"? Why do they use sterilized needles for lethal injections? Why do bankruptcy lawyers expect to be paid? It is not MY fault that I never learned to accept responsibility A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile. For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you just what you find so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour long sob-fest, then start singing and dancing when your favorite song plays. Crazy is when you do or say a totally random thing, like "do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or start having a thumbwar with yourself (i find that i am a very tough opponent). So if you're crazy, copy this onto your profile. Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique,so weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile! 93 percent of teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile. If you have music in your soul, post this in your profile! If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile. If you have a tendency to talk to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile. There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile. 92 percent of teenagers would die if Abercrombie and Fitch told them it wasn't cool to breathe. Put this in your profile if you would be part of the 8 percent laughing your butt off. 98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile. A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle Girl: Slow down, I'm scared! Guy: No, this is fun. Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared. Guy: Then tell me you love me. Girl: I love you, now slow down! Guy: Now give me a big hug. She gives him a big hug Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me. In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she could live. If you would do this for a loved one copy and paste "REMEMBER WHEN" REMEMBER WHEN .. getting HiGH meant swinging at a playground?the worst thing you could get from a boy was c0otiEs?'m 0 m' (was your hero)and when your W0RST ENEMiES were your siblingsand rAcE iSsuEs were about who ran fastest?when - WAR- was a card gameand life was simple and care free?remember when all you wanted to doWAS GROW UP? Put This In Your Profile If You're Still 5 Inside...No Matter How Old You Are Now Mommy...Johnny brought a gun to school, He told his friends that it was cool, And when he pulled the trigger back, It shot with a great, huge crack. Mommy, I was a good girl, I did what I was told, I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold! When I went to school that day, I never said good-bye. I'm sorry that I had to go, But Mommy, please don't cry. When Johnny shot the gun, he hit me and another, And all because Johnny, got the gun from his brother. Mommy, please tell Daddy; That I love him very much, And please tell Zack; my boyfriend; That it wasn't just a crush. And tell my little sister; That she is the only one now, And tell my dear sweet grandmother; I'll be waiting for her now And tell my wonderful friends; That they always were the best Mommy, I'm not the first, I'm no better than the rest Mommy, tell my teachers; I won't show up for class, And never to forget this, And please don't let this pass Mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one, though. deserves this. But mommy, it's not fair, I left without a kiss. And Mommy tell the doctors; I know that they really did try I think I even saw one doctor, trying not to cry. Mommy, I'm slowly dying, with a bullet in my chest, But Mommy please remember, I'm in heaven with the rest When I heard that great, big crack, I ran as fast as I could please listen to me if you would, I wanted to go to college, I wanted to try things that were new I guess I'm not going with Daddy, On that trip to the new zoo I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid, I wanted to be an actress, I really wanted to live. But Mommy I must go now, The time is getting late, Mommy, tell my Zack, I'm sorry to cancel the date. I love you Mommy, I always have, I know you know its true And Mommy all I need to say is, "Mommy, I love you" In Memory of The Columbine & Virginia Tech Students Who Were Lost Please if you would, Don't smash this on the ground. If you pass this on, Maybe people will cry, Just keep this in your heart, For the people who didn't get to say "Good-bye". Its ok to cry, I cried, so can you. One day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject Having the love of your life say you can still be friends is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it. Life was so simple when boys had cooties I ran with scissors, and lived! I hear voices, and they don't like you. A good friend will comfort you when he rejects you. But a best friend will go up to him and say "It's because you're gay isn't it?" My imaginary friend thinks you have serious problems. You know what makes letting go of a crush so hard? The fear that the moment you let go, they'll catch on. She said that she wanted to get high- he took her to the tallest hill in town. She said that she wanted to stay up all night & drink- he gave her a 12 pack of caffeinated pepsi & said ‘drink up’ She said that she wanted to shoot herself- he gave her a water gun, put her finger on the trigger & aimed it at her face. She said that she wanted to cut herself up- he took a polaroid of her, handed it to her along with scissors & had her cut it up. She said that she wanted to see her blood- he took her to get her ears pierced. She said that she wanted to cry herself to sleep- he had her watch a sad romantic movie before bed. She said that she wanted to be alone- he gave her a nametag that sad "my name is: ALONE." She said that she wanted to have someone there to take care of her, always; he asked her when he wasn't If you have ever seen a movie (or show or read a book) so many times that you can quote it word for word. And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in your profile If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or pulled the handle on a door that said push, copy this in your profile. If you have ever fallen up stairs, copy this to your profile Boys are like slinkeys. Useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs. Its always in the last place you look...of course it is, why the hell would you keep looking after I found it? They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill to many people. I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that crap up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you, you asshole! It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile and only 4 to reach out and bitch slap the person annoying you One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions I'm the type of girl who will burst out laughing in dead silence over something that happened a year ago : ) Don't follow in my footsteps . . . I run into walls. Do you want to know why I'm still on earth? Heaven kicked me out and hell is afraid I'll take over FRIENDS: Ask for anything to eat or drink. BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food. FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number. BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial. FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back. BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue." FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you. BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story... FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing. BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door. BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME." FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone. BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell. FRIENDS: Are only there through high-school /college BEST FRIENDS: Are there for life. FRIENDS: Will help you find your way when you're lost. BEST FRIENDS: Will be the one messing with your compass, stealing your map and giving you bad directions FRIENDS: Will help you learn to drive. BEST FRIENDS: Will help you roll the car into the lake so you can collect insurance. FRIENDS: Will help you up when you fall down. BEST FRIENDS: Will laugh and say "Walk much dumbass?" FRIENDS: Will go to a concert with you. BEST FRIENDS: Will kidnap the band with you. FRIENDS: Hide you from the cops. BEST FRIENDS: Are probably the reason they’re after you in the first place. FRIENDS: Get angry at you for calling them late in the night. BEST FRIENDS: Ask why it took so long for you to call FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry. BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore. FRIENDS: Wonder about your love life. BEST FRIENDS: Could blackmail you with it FRIENDS: Lets you make an idiot of myself in public. BEST FRIENDS: Are up there with you making an idiot out of themselves too. FRIENDS: Will comfort you when he rejects you. BEST FRIENDS: Will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?" FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you. BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days...” FRIENDS: Help you find your prince. BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you. FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying. BEST FRIENDS: Already has a shovel ready to bury the loser who made you cry. FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda. BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you. FRIENDS: Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month. BEST FRIENDS: Will throw you a tampon and push you in. FRIENDS: Gives you their umbrella in the rain. BEST FRIENDS: Takes yours and says, "Run bitch run!" FRIENDS: Will help you move. BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies. FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail. BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you saying, "We screwed up." FRIENDS: Tells you she knows how you feel BEST FRIENDS: Just sits down and cries FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough. BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say "Girl drink the rest of that ! You know we don't waste! I Bolded the ones that applied to me. If you hate stereotypes Copy and paste. I'M SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic. I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists. I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun. I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz. I'm JAMAICAN, so I MUST smoke weed. I'm HAITIAN, so I MUST eat cat. I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy. I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy. I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS. I'm a LESBIAN, so I must have a sex-tape. I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist. I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch. I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell. I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell. I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs. Im a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser. I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore. I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive. I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino. I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party. I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy. I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't. I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills. I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch. I read Comics or Fanfiction, so I MUST be a loser. I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak. I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker. WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted. I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled. I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak. I'm AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant. I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo. I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent. I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend. I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers. I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare. I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and want to castrate every man on the earth. I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE. I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid. I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER! I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth. I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future. I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue. I CHAT, I MUST be having cybersex. I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian. I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see. I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE. I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER. I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore, I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED. I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST. I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST. I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick. I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY. I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE. I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard. I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean. I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid. I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroos. I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around. I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian. I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting. I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak. I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life. I'm friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too. I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp. I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, then burst into tears at one mistake I DON'T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems I VOTED FOR JOHN MCCAIN, so I MUST be racist I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat. I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world. I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals. I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people. I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible. I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay. I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash. I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy. I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants. I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem. I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenience store. I'm Native American, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage. I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore... I'm a DANCER, so I MUST be stupid, stuck up, and a whore. I wear SKIRTS, so I MUST be a slut. I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob. I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a Goth or emo. I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend. I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars. I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy. I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore. I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut. I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals. I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a big DICK. I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST! I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin. I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life. I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention. I DRESS IN UNSUAL WAYS, so I MUST be looking for attention. I'm INTO THEATER AND ART, so I MUST be a homosexual. I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist. I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all. I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be gay. I have BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe. I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer. I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser. I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and that's how Russians roll. I'm GERMAN, so I MUST be a Nazi. I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO. I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT. I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited. I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13. I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy. I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy. I'm a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction. I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent. I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I must be ugly...or crazy. I'm BLACK so I must love fried chicken and Kool-Aid. I'm BI so I MUST think every girl I see is hot. I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat. I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly. I'm ASIAN, so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7. I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals. I'm MIXED so I must be fucked up. I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist. I'm in a BAND, so I MUST be a dork. I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA. I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect. I'm WHITE and have black friends so i MUST think I'm black. I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil. I love SHOPPING, so i MUST be rich. I'm an OG so I must be Mexican. I'm FLAT CHESTED, so I MUST be MALE I worship the Greek gods and goddesses so I must hate Christians I'm dark or have dark humor so I must be evil and planning to take over the world YOUR GUY SIDE: mine are bolded You love hoodies. You love jeans. Dogs are better than cats. It's hilarious when people get hurt. You've played with/against boys on a team. Shopping is torture. Sad movies suck. You own/ed an X-Box Played with Hot wheel cars as a kid. At some point in time, you wanted to be a firefighter. You own/ed a DS, PS2 or Sega. You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers. You watch sports on TV. Gory movies are cool. You go to your dad for advice. You own like a trillion baseball caps. You like going to high school football games. You used to/do collect football/baseball cards. Baggy pants are cool to wear. It's kind of weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people. Green, black, red, blue, or silver are one of your favorite colors. You love to go crazy and not care what people think. Sports are fun. Talk with food in your mouth. Sleep with your socks on at night--sometimes TOTAL: 12 YOU’RE GIRL SIDE: You wear lip gloss/chap stick. You love to shop You wear eyeliner. You wear the color pink. Go to your mom for advice. You consider cheerleading a sport. You hate wearing the color black. You like hanging out at the mall. You like getting manicures and/or pedicures. You like wearing jewelry. Skirts are a big part of your wardrobe. Shopping is one of your favorite hobbies. You don't like the movie Star Wars. You were in gymnastics/dance. It takes you around/ more one hour to shower, get dressed, and make-up. You smile a lot more than you should. You have more than 10 pairs of shoes. You care about what you look like. You like wearing dresses when you can. You like wearing body spray/perfume/cologne. You love the movies. Used to play with dolls as little kid. Like putting make-up on someone else for the joy/joke of it. Like being the star of everything. Total: 21 MURPHY'S LESSER-KNOWN LAWS: 1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak. 2. He who laughs last, thinks slowest. 3. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine. 4. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't. 5. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool. 6. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90 probability you'll get it wrong. 7. If you lined up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try to pass them, five or six at a time, on a hill, in the fog. 8. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it. 9. The things that come to those who wait, will be the things left by those who got there first. 10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer. 11. A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries. 12. The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room. 13. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well. 14. When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of 12 people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty. Roses are red, If ya can't beat 'em, join 'em. "You can't always argue with all of the fools in the world. It's easier to let them have their way, then trick them when they aren't paying attention." -Brom, Eragon I had a friend once, but then the rope broke and he got away. If you are so cool that you actually read through all of these (there's more BWHAHAHAHA!!), copy this into your profile!! If you've ever yelled at an inatimate object for not listening to you, copy and paste this into your profile. If that inatimate object now hates you more because you yelled at it, copy and paste this into your profile. If you secretly believe (and hope) that J.K.R. is really a Hogwarts alumni pretending it is fictional, copy this into your profile. If you are Harry Potter obsessed, copy this into your profile. If you don't have a myspace and you don't want a myspace, copy this into your profile. If you wish you were the creator of Harry Potter, copy this into your profile. If you wish that your name was as interesting as Scorpius Malfoy, Sirius Black, Gellert Grindelwald, Lavender Brown, Ginevra Weasley, Albus Severus Potter or anything like Nymphadora, Andromeda, Narcissa or Bellatrix, copy this into your profile. If you have music in your soul, post this in your profile. If you are frequently told to be quiet/shut the hell up, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever tripped on a person, copy this into your profile. Drugs are bad news. Spread the word.Too many people are on crack. If you're not, copy this into your bio. Too many people smoke marijuana. If you don't, copy this into your profile. If you like smiley faces, then copy this into your profile. :D If you and your friends have a nickname, title, or anything else for each other, copy and paste this in your profile. If you have ever shouted out the first thing that comes to mind, copy and paste this to your profile. If you have ever shouted out random thing and then gotten glared at copy and paste this to your profile Take Time To Read Each Sentence This is this cat This is is cat This is how cat This is to cat This is keep cat This is a cat This is retard cat This is busy cat This is for cat This is forty cat This is seconds cat Now read the THIRD word of every line. X) This has got to be one of the most clever PRESBYTERIAN: ASTRONOMER: DESPERATION: When you rearrange the letters: THE EYES: GEORGE BUSH: THE MORSE CODE : SLOT MACHINES: ANIMOSITY: ELECTION - RESULTS: SNOOZE ALARMS: A DECIMAL POINT: THE EARTHQUAKES: ELEVEN PLUS TWO: If you realize that copying and pasting things into your profile is pointless, yet you do it anyways, copy and paste this into your profile If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile. You say Pink, You say the Twilight series , Here's a poem about child abuse. Please, stop the abuse and save one child at a time! A poem about Child Abuse My name is Lucifer I am three, My eyes are swollen I cannot see, I must be stupid I must be bad, What else could have made My daddy so mad? I wish I were better I wish I weren’t ugly, Then maybe my mommy Would still want to hug me. I can’t do a wrong I can’t speak at all Or else im locked up All day long. When im awake im all alone The house is dark My folks aren’t home When my mommy does come home I'll try and be nice, So maybe ill just get One whipping tonight. I just heard a car My daddy is back From Charlie’s bar. I hear him curse My name is called I press myself Against the wall I try to hide From his evil eyes I’m so afraid now I’m starting to cry He finds me weeping Calls me ugly words, He says its my fault He suffers at work. He slaps and hits me And yells at me more, I finally get free And run to the door He’s already locked it And i start to bawl, He takes me and throws me Against the hard wall I fall to the floor With my bones nearly broken, And my daddy continues With more bad words spoken, "I’m sorry!", I scream But its now much to late His face has been twisted Into a unimaginable shape The hurt and the pain Again and again O please God, have mercy! O please let it end! And he finally stops And heads for the door While i lay there motionless Brawled on the floor My name is Lucifer I am three, Tonight my daddy Murdered me Now i roam the underworld, to help those in need. I may seem evil, but i'm not. And if you read this and don’t pass it on I pray for your forgiveness Because you would have to be AOne heartless person To not be effected By this Poem And because you are effected, Do something about it! So all i ask you to do Is pass this on! IF YOU ARE AGAINST CHILD ABUSE Really sad poem, so, please. Do a favor for a child. Stop the abuse. This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her in the ground when she was still alive. The murderer chanted,"Toma sota balcu" as he buried her. Now that you have read the chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this in your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile Don't run in the school hall, gliding is more fun! Favorite Books: divergent Favorite Passing Times: browsing on the computer Favorite Drinks: soda Favorite Colors: Black and midnight Blue Favorite Animals: wolf, snake Nicknames: kid Relationship Status: single Gay, Lesbian, or Straight?: straight (\_/) Copy and Paste if you read fanfics about things you have never read or seen |
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