He asked her to Hogsmeade one hundred and thirty seven times. Then he stopped. And now Lily Evans has to battle her own fat mouth and mad head and the probability that number one hundred and thirty eight's going to have to be on her if she wants James Potter to ever smile her way again. Oh dear.

Two obnoxious girls get sucked into the Narutoverse (inexplicably OP, of c); cue self-aware generic crossover hijinx and absurd character study! Meaning and plot slowly generate. I wrote this as a kid, am updating 10 yrs later, same oddball genre, but later chapters plot. Mature themes (later), dirty language. SasuOC, barely. Humor/adventure/romance/surreal/shoujo/slice-of-life

In which both Yuri and Victor got their L-words from Yuuri, but one of them took more than the other.

A young Gondorian healer is forced to marry Denethor, who is unhappy and strict, but requests that she accompany Boromir to the council of Elrond first. Little does she know that she is about to be immersed in a terrible journey. Eventual Aragorn/OC. Technically a 10th Walker story, but actually well written and original. Based on the books. Please let me know what you think!

Everything was so easy and real with Yuuri. Even with the lingering tension and the unspoken inevitability of separation, they somehow managed to fall back into something close to a routine, effortless conversation, easy jabs and quiet smiles and something he wanted to hold on to for the rest of his life. Home.

Viktor had never envisioned himself scooping the plastered remnants of another Grand Prix Finalist into his arms in the men's restroom. He had certainly never envisioned those plastered remnants belonging to Katsuki Yuuri: the shy, soft, birdlike boy who skates as though his soul lives in the spark between blade and ice.

He was going to make him regret ever accusing Victor of joking. He was going to show him how merciless he can be. He was going to suck him dry. He was going to kiss Yuri Katsuki senseless, then ask him what 2 plus 2 is, just for him to say Victor's name as an answer. (Cover art by siel00)

There was no one but Katsuki Yuuri to blame for Victor's current predicament. Or the "victor vaguely masturbates while pining for yuuri" fic no one ever asked for

Phil has come to the conclusion that he needs to settle down, and the lack of romance in his life is beginning to weigh heavy within him. This thought has been keeping him up at night, and he's finally decided to tell Dan what's been bothering him, but it's just not that easy. Not when the truth hurts that much. (Rated T for language and sexual innuendos, because Dan and Phil.)

The warmness of a bright summer's day beating down to heat up the sand where he'd lay and the sound of deliciously soft waves lapping at the water's edge in the background is the perfect metaphor for how Dan makes Phil feel. Safe, calm and relaxed, without a worry in the world when Dan's by his side, and maybe Dan feels exactly the same way.

What happens when Phil can't sleep and he doesnt know what to do? He pays Dan a visit and the escalate quickly. (aka the time I thought I should write a powerbottom!Phil fic and said oh fuck it I might as well throw a praise kink in there too. Have fun!)

No matter how cold it is outside Phil can always find a way to set Dan's heart on fire. (TW: Extremely slight mentions of self-hate/depression in one paragraph)

One big emotional roller coaster ensures when Dan deludes himself that their insignificant four-year age gap could be the root of all his problems.

Love; when it's strong enough, it can span any distance, transcend any length of time, and there's nothing you can do to stop it. You can try and hold back, you might have to, but love is simply more powerful than you are. This, of course, means: when it crushes you, it comes down hard. Can love still save you when it's the very thing hurting you?

Dan is the shy son of the Transfiguration professor and Phil is her star student. Dan quietly crushes on him while he is frequently visited by a little blue songbird who likes to sing a very certain tune. (Hogwarts AU)

After the Doctor goes missing, Rose is back from Pete's world to find him, but she'll need the 11th Doctor's help. Bound and determined as she is to find her Doctor, Rose can't ignore this new Doctor. Things start to get tangled as they work together to find the missing Doctor and face the changes they've gone through during their time apart. S7-ish.

Alfred is complaining about his parents and his roommate Arthur decides to comfort him in a rather...unconventional way. UKUS, BDSM, daddy kink.

"Sometimes I think about having sex with you," Alfred admitted. "In a fantasizing way?" Arthur asked. "Maybe? It's more like I asked myself once that if I had to lose my virginity to someone that I know right now, who would I choose? And I picked you because you're my best friend and I trust you." Alfred and Arthur are close friends that are about to get a whole lot closer.

In which the edges of sleep are as blurred as the definitions of 'what are we'. Phan. Fluff.

The mysterious Nicci Lonsen joins Hogwarts in Harry's third year and somehow manages to tell them nothing and everything at the same exact time. With many OC's and original plot! ...Eventually. Includes lots of lying and immaturity. H/G R/H

In which literally no one knows what's happening - including the author. This is a re-vamp of midnightmusings29's story, 'Thank God the New Girl Came.' Read at your own risk. NOT Harry/OC, I like my Hinny, thanks.

It's the hottest day in the history of forever, and Dan and Phil are slowly dying on the couch. And then Dan decides to quicken the process. Phan AmazingPhilxDanisnotonfire. M for, well...mature happenings. Not as PWP as it sounds.

Today was the day. The day that Phil stopped staring across the library at the mysterious boy like a creeper and actually walked over to introduce himself. Not in a, you know, obvious stalker kind of way or anything. In the Phil kind of way (which honestly wasn't that much different). Phan AmazingPhilxDanisnotonfire. M for (sexy) public indecency.

With Lisanna's reappearance, Natsu's been too busy catching up to go on missions. Unfortunately for Lucy the rent is due and with her partner preoccupied she's left with one last option. Oh well, a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do… Eventual NaLu! Rating may eventually go up. *Ch. 17 CONTAINS ADULT MATERIAL!*

Amy is dismal at cooking, but she's not going to let that stop her. At least not until she's poisoned everyone at the Nine-Nine. Pre-established Jake/Amy. Also, get ready for pure fluff.

So yeah, you kiss her. You take her mouth. Because there was just a bloody war that was fought and won. And people died. And it was her red hair you saw, and her flowery scent that lingered about you as death so gently ripped you apart.

"Hey," she said, looking at her husband over her shoulder. "Did you use a different mug last night?" "No, and the TARDIS would have washed it during the night if I had," he answered without looking up from the eggs, adding a pinch of salt. "That's weird," frowned Amy, eventually shrugging, assuming it had been the Doctor even if pink wasn't really his style Doctor/Rose Doctor/River

"Hello. Welcome to Hell. Name, please." US/UK

Gaara is struggling to deal with his growing physical and emotional reactions to Naruto. But when the blonde goes missing for more than a week and returns traumatized, will Gaara be able to tell him how he feels without causing more damage? GaaraxNaruto

Steampunk/Pirate AU. Pirate captains Antonio Carriedo and Arthur Kirkland may have to put aside their differences to face a bigger threat. Feat. fem!Romano and fem!America, (Spamano and USUK) but there will be a lot of Hetalia characters in this one. Non-nation human names used. Minor character deaths and strong language, violence, and other themes.

Eleven/Rose; Part One of the Who Holidays series. The Ponds try to figure out what to get a sullen Doctor for Christmas, and Amy manages to wheedle a single muttered sentence from him that sounds suspiciously like he wants a rose. By that notion, the Ponds go to a flower shop and buy a rose, only to run into a certain former companion.

Dan has questions about Phil's love life, and Phil tries to humor him without wanting to hit his head against the wall. Confessions are made, and Phil's pretty sure his head is about to explode. Amazingphil Danisnotonfire Phan DanxPhil A short, fluffy one!

Naruto Uzumaki didn't take any pride in his infamous, promiscuous behaviour. What he did take pride in however was his ability to sense a gay virgin man from half a mile away; and the red head sat opposite him on the underground might as well have tattooed a sign to his forehead stating his innocence. Naruto just expected a little bit of fun. He never imagined falling for the guy.

Alfred agrees to help Arthur clean his house, but gets a little more than he bargained for when he discovers (and proceeds to make fun of) some of Arthur's old pirate clothes. WARNING- UKUS Lemon; Smut; Boy-Boy Love; Detailed sex

During a brief encounter where Gaara attempts to explain desert clothing to Naruto, his body reacts in a way he doesn't expect. However, the Kazekage can't just take what he wants. Rated M for mature themes, yaoi, violence, sexuality (GaaNaru)

Gaara's never liked hospitals, and he's really not happy fussing over his older brother and wasting his Friday. But then after he stumbles into an attractive blond nurse in the corridor and ends up pressed against the wall in an empty room, Gaara thinks that maybe hospitals aren't too bad after all. NaruGaa AU

"He heard the shower turn off and the padding of feet on the tiled floor. Dan froze like a deer in headlights as he saw the doorknob turn slowly. " Dan wrestles with his feelings for a certain ebony-haired boy, and is caught doing something that he shouldn't. How will both boys react when Phil brings it up? Amazingphil danisnotonfire Phan PhilxDan Rated M for a reason!

England loses a bet and must wear a very tight pair of skinny jeans to a world meeting. The other nations find this hot. But, the sensation that his jeans and their lecherous attention create annoy America. What does he do about it? Sexy-times ensue! De-anon from the Kink Meme.

A less amazing Phan fiction: Dan falls victim to Phil's touches.

Steve finally gets fed up with Tony's juvenile pranks. When Tony models for a sex toy, Steve seizes the opportunity. Or, it seizes him.

Tony Stark is testing some new holographic animation technology and decides to use Steve as his guinea pig. Things, unsurprisingly, take a turn for the naughty. Disclaimer: I do not own Marvel heroes. I just like to write about them doing naughty stuff.

"Because, Lucy Heartfillia, I want you." He leaned forward to place a kiss on the corner of her mouth and made her lips part in anticipation. "I want all of you. And by the end of the night," he whispered, placing a series of kisses along her cheeks and eyelids, making said eyes flutter closed. "I plan on know every single part of you." Warning: rated M for a reason!

In which there is sex pollen, Tony is needy and horny, and Steve is more than happy to be ridden like a fucking bronco. Except, it takes a while because Steve's got Morals and Scruples.

Tony is having a bad week and attempts to drown his sorrows with alcohol. Steve is there to try and talk him down. "Listen, Pop, I don't know how you did things back in your time... but this, right here, this is the future." "Really, Stark? 'Cause to me, this looks like you killing yourself through alcohol." Warning: Character death

Me, my friend, and my little bro all get sucked into Bleach. Why? I don't know. I was bored. But I do know one thing: Dang, this is fun! Rated T for language. Ya, I know, crappy summary. Just read it before Grimmjow goes all crazy on ya.

Arthur is cursed and becomes invisible to the whole of Camelot – no one can hear or see him, except, of course, for Merlin.

There's nothing more that Naruto wants to see then Gaara, whimpering and debauched from pleasure, lying unravelled beneath him covered in sweat. But with the man's stony, quiet persona; that might be quite a hard task to accomplish. NaruGaa

It takes nerve to play professional Quidditch. It takes even more to tell your mother and brothers that you're leaving home to live in sin with your boyfriend. Harry/Ginny with mentions of other pairings. M for a reason.

Alec wakes up in Magnus's bed after a wild night. Rated M for lemon. Malec.

Magnus is all about color. Alec isn't, though not for lack of trying. "If you ever get fired from being High Warlock, you'll have a lucrative career as the paint person in a Home Depot or something."

It didn't matter how much it hurt. He would accept the situation with all the dignity and grace befitting a true shinobi. Because Hyuuga Neji wasn't selfish; not anymore. Neji/Naruto slash

When Arthur strains a muscle, Merlin must tend to him.

Gaara has a meeting, so he decides to have some fun with Naruto. Includes non-conventional use of sand. PWP, Hardcore Yaoi, Toys, Bondage, GaaNaru.

Kazekage Gaara is angry after visiting Konoha, but surely Naruto can put everything right? A very Happy Birthday to Gaara 19/1 ! PWP, fluff, mature content, GaaNaru, and so on and so forth.

Sirius was laughing. "Have you always been this funny?" he asked, an odd expression on his face. I shrugged. "Well, you know what they say. You have to watch the quiet ones." He muttered something under his breath that sounded like "Clearly."

Merlin/Arthur slash: Gaius takes on a new apprentice. Arthur's not amused.

Magnus is holding his annual Christmas party while Alec fails to realize the eggnog is spiked.

"Life threatening injury could be such an intrusion on Magnus's canoodling time."

The night after the battle Alec comes to Magnus's room to finally show the warlock just how much he loves him. Unfortunately the fates are feeling more humorous than kind. This is going to be even harder than Alec originally thought.

Alfie. Which Arthur totally called him last night. And thus begins Alfred's quest to get him to say it again. USUK. COMPLETE.

Harry is brooding again and since Hermione and Ron don't want to alienate him further by pushing him away, they're too scared to force him to talk. Lucky. Ginny has no such worries and an unorthadox approach to sensitive.

“Gin, is there something wrong?” the man asked, moving closer to her. She shook her head and closed her eyes, tears starting to fall on her cheeks. “I think so … because I can’t remember who you are,” she cried.

Jim is cold. Spock is hot. Temperature-hot, of course.

A chance encounter. // 'He squeezes her hand a bit and she tries not to jump--she’d rather forgotten he’d been holding it.'

.:drabble:. Tales from Konoha's Quintessential Dysfunctional Family, the Hyuugas. Starring Hinata, Hanabi, Hiashi, Hizashi, and Neji, even though his name doesn't start with an H.

[Yaoi, GaaNaru, humor] Naruto thinks he's a cat, and Gaara's fine with that.

Alec only has his memories and his regret. Spoilers for City of Glass. Takes place the night of the funeral.

Neji and Naruto make the ultimate commitment and purchase a plant together. But in the back of his mind, Naruto wonders, is their relationship really strong enough for a step this big? NejiNaru.

Merlin is making Arthur anxious. A continuation of a scene during 'A remedy to cure all ills'. ARTHURxMERLIN. Rated to be safe. And because I might add another chapter if people want.

Arthur's stresssed and it's Merlin's job to help him relax. Sequel to Anxious and Stressed. Rated for a reason! ArthurxMerlin. Slash.

A new knight in arrives in Camelot and there’s something about him Arthur really doesn’t like. Arthur/Merlin slash.

Arthur wanks nearly every night just thinking about Merlin - hell, he can wank whilst thinking about Merlin picking flowers or making concoctions for Gaius. Arthur/Merlin; crack inspired by a fanvid done to "Jizz in my Pants" by the Lonely Island.

Everyone is tired of Cho and when Hermione tells her that Harry fancies her, Ginny decides to take matters into her own hands with a little help from her friends.

It's the middle of the night, Clary hears some private things coming from Alec's bed...

One hour. That was all Alec had to wait until he could see Magnus again. Note: This is a companion to "Flicker". Please read "Flicker" before reading this one. Oldie but goodie. Slash. Malec.

Ten hours until they were to leave Alicante for Brooklyn. And Alec wasn't ready to leave; not without Magnus. Oldie but goodie. Slash. Malec.

On the list of Very Bad Things Sirius Black has done, Snogging Moony In a Bathroom is really only eighth or ninth.

With little distractions like ninja wars out of the way, Naruto and Gaara finally have time to hang out and be friends. And to realize it's actually been a long time since they considered each other just 'friends'.

Naruto tries to seduce Gaara. Gaara tries to resist. Very big screw-ups ensue. Featuring really short shorts, an odd Hidden Mist mating ritual, and a bedsheet. Oh, and lots of humour, angst, and sap. In that order. Complete!

Arthur takes a bath and thinks about Merlin. Better than it sounds. Arthur/Merlin. Warning!citrus. M for a reason. Teensy tiny bit of angst that barely matters. Edited out, hopefully, all of the name mistakes. Thanks to the poeple that pointed them out.

SasuNaru, GaaNaru. One-shot. Because Sasuke is a bastard and Gaara can kick his pale Uchiha ass any day. Nyah.

A short comical story set in HBP about Harry and Ginny and a trap that locks them together.

Naruto is in a brand new relationship with Hinata. But when he meets her cousin Neji, he finds himself inexplicably preoccupied with the dark haired boy, despite his prickly personality. AU yaoi

..."I still can't figure out why I kissed him." Naruto and Gaara. The sun and the moon. One and the same. A sudden mission in the Sand Village causes Naruto to reevalutate his relationship with the Kazekage. NaruGaara. Yaoi. 3-part-fic.

Ginny Weasely is stuck as Maid of Honor in two separate, highly unconventonal weddings. She's none too happy about the situation, as it only reminds her that she is Without a Wizard. To top things off, she's hungry, and she's not allowed to eat her hat...

Rule 8: You cannot share the same bed. You may be sharing dormitories... DORMITORIES? WE’RE SHARING DORMITORIES! Needless to say, this was not my best day. Marrying Sirius Black is not all that it cracks up to be. SBOC. FINISHED.

Diplomatic relations may be hard to maintain when one is in heat. Gaara's visit to Konoha has the worst timing possible. Or the best. [NaruGaa. Twoshot.]

In the words of Slughorn: You will not underestimate the power of obsessive love. James and Lily start their relationship in 7th year, but what happens when Lily starts receiving love letters from the Half Blood Prince? 'Obsessive Lily Disorder' sequel.

Neji, Hinata, and Tenten spy on Naruto and Lee. It is pure crack, not to be taken seriously. Oneshot. Implied yaoi

Written for The Blanket Scenario LJ Community. I do not own Naruto. YaoiLemon

[NaruNeji fic, yaoi] Naruto has a bit of a fixation on hair, but Neji doesn't mind.

COMPLETE! POST HBP Harry and crew are taken off to live out the famous tale of Robin Hood. All involved will be in character and it will follow cannon. HG RHr

GaaNaru. Spoilers for the recent manga chapters. After Gaara's ressurrection Naruto can't sleep the night before they return to Konoha and pays Gaara visit. Mild lime.

Fifteen year old Ginny Weasley's diary, filled with embarrassing situations, sarcasm, and a lot of Harry Potters. She's not in love with him or anything. Honestly. [And it's won an award!]

Missing moments from Half Blood Prince. Ginny discusses her feelings on everything from Dean and Harry to Luna's commentating at the quidditch match. Gives an insight into the life of the young girl that Harry Potter fell for.

James worships the ground Lily, er, throws him on? Includes stalking, Polyjuice potion and James attempting many acts of suicide such as drowning his head in toilet bowls because Apple Of His Eye Evans hates his guts. Or does she? Complete .

Itachi, Sasuke, and Naruto die. Death laments the loss of his beloved chair. Wacky hijinks ensue.

Penny is panicking. Where is she? How did she get here? How is she going to get home and whose backside will she kick first when she does? A woman lost in Middle Earth wearing only her pyjamas. This can't be good... (STRONG language; NOT a M-Sue)

*Ch. 14 uploaded* What will a wizard do for love? Apparently humiliate himself - daily. Harry, Ginny, Ron and Hermione alone in the country. Who thought this was a good idea? Ch. 14 - Now What? Please R&R. *COMPLETE*