HEY!!!! My name is 'Do I really seem that stupid to you, do you think i would put my name on here? Or do I come across as suicidal to you?' which is a fair point since I say 'I HATE Justin Bieber and One Direction' to my two best friends who claim to be the biggest Belieber and Directioner in the world! Was that actually right? I tune them out when EITHER of them goes down that road, I REALLY don't like them! Well, you can call me R if you want! But you don't have to, ya know, whatever goes your way, it's cool! I go to TTS in England! And by the way, I HATE TEA!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND COFFEE!!!!!!! BUT MAINLY TEA! soz, had to get that out :D

1.) You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.
2.) You haven't played solitare with real cards for years.
3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they don't have a screenname or MySpace.
4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV.
6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.
7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.
8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.
9.) And you were too busy to notice number 5.
10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.
11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.
12.) Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did.

If you are odd and proud of it put this on your profile.

SPLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!! If you are really random put this on your profile.

If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy this into your profile

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy this into your profile

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

98 percent of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

If you think that being unique is better than being cool then put this on your profile

Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.

Ever ran into a wall or part of one, Copy and paste this into your profile.

Racism is wrong and can often times destroy people's self confidence. It's a horrible and cruel way to treat people. To prove that we are all alike, try this simple experiment: Hold your hand up to a light of some kind. You'll see a shadow cast nearby. Now, have someone of a different race hold their hand up too. You'll see, essentially, the same image. Five fingers and a palm. Skin color doesn't matter when you get right down to it. If you are against racism, copy this message

If you think everyone is a little but racist copy this into your profile.

"The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, " "When I grew up I was BLACK, " "When I'm sick I'm BLACK, " "When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, " "When I'm cold I'm BLACK, " "When I die I'll be BLACK." "But you sir." "When you're born you're pink, " "When you grow up you're white, " "When you're sick, you're green, " "When you go in the sun you turn red, " "When you're cold you turn blue, " "And when you die you turn purple." "And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away... copy this to your profile if you hate racism.

30 out of 100 kids go to college. The other 70 either drop out or don't have the proper skills to. If you are one of the 30 that KNOW that your going to college put this on your profile and add your name to the list. EcoliandDahChihuahua, Gaara's-pandachan101, Hillarious Tragedy, Bruce n' Charlie, Kara Hitame, Justified Assassin, Diabola Vespera, Kawaii girl 4 life, McDolphinHPgirl

98% of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile.

98% of teenagers do drugs and alcohol. If you like bagels, copy this into your profile.

98% of the internet population has a Myspace. If you're part of the 2% that can resist stupid fads, copy and paste this into your profile.

92% of today's youth have gone to rap and pop. If you are one of the 8% who still listen to real music, copy and paste this message.

95% of teen girls would die if they saw Edward Cullen about to jump off a bulding. If you are one of the 5% eating popcorn shouting "Do a flip!", copy and paste this message.

A good friend will bail you out of jail, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying 'Damn that was fun!
A good friend will care for you when you're hurt, a true friend will be sitting next to you laughing their ass off
In a dog-eat-dog world the best thing to do is become a cat
A simple friend wonders about your romance history, a real friend could blackmail you with it
A simple friend doesn't know your parents' first names a real friend has their phone numbers in their address book
92 percent of the teen population would be dead if Abercrombie and Fitch said it wasn't cool to breath anymore. Copy this to your profile if you are one of the eight who would be laughing their asses off!
96 percent of teenagers wouldn't be caught dead in HotTopic if you're of the four percent that would die without it copy and paste this to your profile.
Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect
There is a light at the end of every tunnel...just pray it's not a train
Isn't is it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"?
When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs?
Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
Why is the word abbreviation so long?
If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, is it misspelled?
And if it is misspelled, how would we know?-AML
Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing?
Why are a "wise man" and a "wise guy" opposites?
Why do "overlook" and "oversee" mean opposite things?Why are they called "stands" when they are made for sitting?
Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected?
If you are dialing from a touch-tone phone, Why do you call it 'dialing'? -Ziggy
Do coffins have lifetime guarantees?
If the sky is the limit, then what is space, over the limit?
Are children who act in rated 'R' movies allowed to see them?
"Cute as a button" Is that supposed to be a compliment? Since when are buttons cute?
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out"?
Isn't Disney World just a people trap operated by a mouse?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Can you get cornered in a round room?
Why is it illegal to park in a handicapped parking space but its ok to use a handicapped toilet?
Why are people so scared of mice, yet we all love Mickey Mouse?
Wouldn't it be smart to make the sticky stuff on envelopes taste like chocolate?
Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning 'many' in Latin, and 'tics' as in 'bloodsucking creatures’?
Why is it that when things get wet they get darker, even though water is clear?
If a fork were made of gold would it still be considered silverware?
Why is there that little space inside strawberries, as if it was meant for a pit, and then the seeds are on the outside?
Why do you go "back and forth" to town if you really must go forth before you go back?
Why do companies offer you "free gifts?" Since when has a gift NOT been free?
If something "goes without saying," why do people still say it?
You know the expression, "Don't quit your day job?" Well what do you say to people that work nights?
If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
Should vegetarians eat animal crackers?
How is it possible to have a civil war?
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
Whose cruel idea was it for the word "Lisp" to have a "S" in it?
Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?
If you spin an oriental man in a circle three times, does he become disoriented?
If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?
Why on Earth, with over 3/4 of our planet covered by water, don't we call it 'ocean'?--Ziggy
Do they have reserved parking for non-handicapped people at the Special Olympics?
Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?
If quitters never win, and winners never quit, how can it be wise to: "Quit while you're ahead"?
Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?
What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?
Most mothers feed their babies with little spoons and forks. What do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?
Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do, write to these people? Why don't they put their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen could look for them while delivering the mail?
Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?
After eating, do amphibians need to wait an hour before getting OUT of the water?
If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?
What's another word for Thesaurus?--Steven Wright
If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?
Why is it that when transporting stuff on a car its called a SHIPment, but if transporting stuff on a ship its called CARgo?
How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?
If two wrongs don't make a right, then how come two negatives make a positive?

I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.
I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.
I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.
We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.
I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.
I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.
I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again.
I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.
We are the couple who had the Realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.
I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.
I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.
I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.
I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.
I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.
I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I did not have to always deal with society hating me.
I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.
I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.
I am the person who is afraid of telling his loving Christian parents he loves another male.

Copy this into your profile if you think homophobia is wrong:

1) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, liposuction and air conditioning.
2) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
3) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.
4) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.
5) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Brittany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.
6) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.
7) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.
8) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.
9) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.
10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans...

This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her in the ground when she was still alive. The murderer chanted,"Toma sota balcu" as he buried her. Now that you have read the chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this in your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded

WHY BOYS SHOULDN'T CHEAT

There was once a girl named Ashley who had a boyfriend named Jack. Jack was the most popular guy in school. The three most popular girls were Courtney, ASHLEY, and Emma. Jack thought of Ashley as OKAY, but he REALLY liked Courtney. Courtney liked Jack also. Well, of course she did, everyone did! Ashley and Courtney were worst enemies. Courtney tried to steal Jack away every time she had a chance to.

One day, Courtney asked Jack if he wanted to go to the movies. Ashley heard everything...what movie theater and what time. Ashley approached the movies that night and followed Jack and Courtney. Ashley sat right behind them. She watched them get close to each other and kiss...not only kiss, but practically get it on in the theater. Courtney told Jack: "Do you want to come to my place and skip this boring movie?" He replied": "Hell, yes." Ashley had peeked through Courtney's window. Jack and her were messing around and Ashley watched the whole thing.

The next day at school Ashley wasn't there.

For the next few days Ashley wasn't there. A week later her mother found her in her closet dead...she committed suicide because she had loved Jack so much. Next to Ashley's dead body was a note.

A note that read: My dearest Jack, I watched you at the movie and at Courtney's house and I will continue to watch you. I never thought you would do something like this to me. I really loved you, Jack. I died for you just like Jesus died for us. Always with you, Ashley. Please forward this or Ashley will haunt you and try to kill you because she wants everyone to know about Courtney.

Johnny brought a gun to school,
He told his friends that it was cool,
And when he pulled the trigger back,
It shot with a great crack.

Mommy, I was a good girl, I did
What I was told,
I went to school, I got straight As',
I even got the gold!

But Mommy, when I went to school that day,
I never said goodbye,
I'm sorry Mommy, I had to go,
But Mommy, please don't cry.

When Johnny shot the gun,
He hit me and another,
And all because Johnny,
Got the gun from his older brother.

Mommy, please tell Daddy;
That I love him very much,
And please tell Chris; my boyfriend;
That it wasn't just a crush.

And tell my little sister;
That she is the only now,
And tell my dear sweet Grandmother;
I'll be waiting for her now,

And tell my wonderful friends;
That they always were the best,
Mommy, I'm not the first,
I'm no better then the rest.

Mommy, tell my teachers;
I won't show up for class,
And never to forget this,
And please don't let this pass.

Mommy, why'd it have to be me?
No one deserves this,
Mommy, warn the others,
Mommy, I left without a kiss.

And Mommy, tell the doctors;
I know they really did try,
I think I even saw a doctor,
Trying not to cry.

Mommy, I'm slowly dying,
With a bullet in my chest,
But Mommy, please remember,
I'm in heaven with the rest.

Mommy, I ran as fast as I could,
When I heard that crack,
Mommy, listen to me if you would,
I'm not coming back.

I wanted to go to college,
I wanted to try things that were new,
I guess I'm not going with Daddy;
On that trip to the new zoo.

I wanted to get married,
I wanted to have a kid,
I wanted to be an actress,
Mommy, I wanted to live.

But Mommy, I'm must go now,
The time is getting late,
Mommy tell my boyfriend,
I'm sorry, but I had to cancel the date.

I love you Mommy, I always have,
I know; you know it's true,
And Mommy all I wanted to say is,
"Mommy, I love you"

--In Memory Of The School Shootings--
If this poem touched you in any way, please pass it
on. And even if it didn't, pass it on just for the
memory of the innocent children

girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle

Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!

Guy: No, this is fun.

Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.

Guy: Then tell me you love me.

Girl: I love you, now slow down!

Guy: Now give me a big hug.

She gives him a big hug

Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.

In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she would live even if he died.

AAAHHH, THE BOY IN THAT IS THE BESTEST EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!

Your One and Only Wish

Do it one by one, don't look ahead!

1. Write the name of a person of the opposite sex.

2. Which is your favorite color out of red, black, blue, green, and yellow?

3. Your first initial?

4. Your month of birth?

5. Which color do you like more, black or white?

6. Name of a person of the same sex as yours.

7. Your favorite number?

8. Do you like California of Florida more?

9. Do you like the lake or ocean more?

10. Write down a wish (a realistic one that can happen soon)

Are you done?

If so, scroll down

(Don't cheat!)

The Answers

1. You are completely in love with this person.

2. If you choose:
Red: You are alert and you life is full of love.
Black: You are conservative and aggressive.
Green: Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back.
Blue: you are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the one you love.
Yellow: You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are down.

3. If you're initial is:
A-K: You have a lot of love and friendships in your life.
L-R: You try to enjoy life to the maximum and you love life is soon to blossom
S-Z: You like to help others and your future love life looks very good.

4. If You were born in:
Jan-Mar: The year will for very well for you and you will discover the you fall in love with someone totally unexpected.
Apr-June: you will have a strong love relationship that will no long but the memories will last forever
July-Sept: You will have a great year and will experience a major life changing experience for the good.
Oct-Dec: Your love life will not be too great, but eventually you will find your soul mate.

5. If you choose...
Black: your life will take on a different direction; it will seem hard at the time but will be the best thing for you and you will be glad for the change.
White: You will have a friend who completely confides in ykou and would do anything for you but you may not realize it.

6. This person is your best friend.

7. This is how many close friends you have in a lifetime.

8. If you choose...
California: You like adventure.
Florida: You are a laidback person.

9. If you choose...
Lake: You are loyal to your friends and your love. And you are very reserved.
Ocean: You are spontaneous and like to please people.

10. This wish will come true only if you Re-post this bulletin in one hour and it will come true before your next birthday!

FRIENDS/BEST FRIENDS

FRIENDS: Will comfort you when he rejects you. BEST FRIENDS: Will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you. BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."

FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall. BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?"

FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince. BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you.

FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying. BEST FRIENDS: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!"

FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda. BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you.

FRIENDS: Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month. BEST FRIENDS: Will throw you a tampon and push you in.

FRIENDS: Gives you their umbrella in the rain. BEST FRIENDS: Takes yours and says, "Run - beep - run!"

FRIENDS: Will help you move. BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies.

FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail. BEST FRIENDS: Would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink. BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa. BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail. BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "DAMN!" we messed up! (:D. . . lg1514. . . .)

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry. BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number. BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back. BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you. BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing. BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door. BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone. BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. (aka: drinking buddies) BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough. BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Girl drink the rest of that ! You know we don't waste!"

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty
uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal
pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a
rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't
mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are in, the
olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer
be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl
mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.
Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed
ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.
Amzanig, huh? Yaeh and I awlyas thought slpeling
was ipmorantt! Tahts so cool!
If you could read that, paste this to your profile.

She was pushed

About 6 years ago in Indiana, Carmen Winstead was pushed down a sewer opening by 5 girls in her school, trying to embarrass her in front of her school during a fire drill. When she didn't submerge the police were called. They went down and brought up 17 year old Carmen Winstead's body, her neck broke from hitting the ladder, her face peeeled off from the side concrete at the bottom. The girls told everyone she fell...They believed them.

FACT: 2 months ago, 16 year old David Gregory read this post and didn't repost it. When he went to take a shower he heard laughter from his swower. He started freaking out and ran to his computer to repost it. He said goodnight to his mom and went to sleep. 5 hours later, his mom woke up in the middle of the night cause of a loud noise. David was gone. That morning, a few hours later, the police found him in the sewer, in the dark, his neck broke and his face skin peeled off.

If you don't repost this saying "she was pushed" or "they pushed her down a sewer" then Carmen will get you, either from a sewer, the toilet or the shower. When you go to sleep you'll wake up in the sewer, in the dark, and then Carmen will come and kill you.

The Percy Jackson pledge:

I promise to remember Percy
Whenever I'm at sea
I promise to remember Annabeth
Whenever a spider comes at me
I promise to protect nature
For Grover's sake of course
I promise to remember Luke
When my heart fills with remorse
I promise to remember Chiron
Whenever I see a sign that says "free pony ride"
I promise to remember Tyson
Whenever a friend says they'll stick by my side
I promise to remember Thalia
Whenever a friend is scared of heights
I promise to remember Clarisse
Whenever I see someone that gives me a fright
I promise to remember Bianca
Whenever I see a sister scold her younger brother
I promise to remember Nico
Whenever I see someone who doesn't get along with others
I promise to remember Zoe
Whenever I watch the stars
I promise to remember Rachel
Whenever a limo passes my car
Yes, I promise to remember PJO
Wherever I may go
So all may see my obsession
Because I know what the Olympians know!

PLeAsE pUt ThiS iN yOu'Re PrOfiLe:

Her name was Aurora

She was only five

This is what happened
When she was alive

Her dad was a drunk
Her mom was an addict
Her parents kept her
Locked in an attic

Her only friend
Was a little toy bear
It was old and worn out
And had patches of hair

She always talks to it
When no one is around
She lays there and hugs it
Not a peep of sound

Until her parents
Unlock the door
Some more and more pain
She'll have to endure

A bruise on her leg
A scar on her face
Why would she be
In such a horrible place?

But she grabs her bear
And softly crys
She loves her parents
But they want her to die

She sits in the corner
Quiet but thinking
"God why? Why is
My life always sinking?"

Such a bad life
For a sad little kid
She'd get beaten and beaten
For anything she did

Then one night
Her mom came home high
The poor child was hit and slapped
As hours went by

Then her mom suddenly
Grabbed for a blade
It was sharp and pointy
One that she made

She thrusted the blade
Right in her chest
"You deserve to die
You worthless pest"

The mom walked out
Leaving the girl slowly dying
She grabbed her bear
And again started crying

Police showed up
At the small little house
They quickly barged in
everything was as quite as a mouse

One officer slowly
Opened a door
To find the sad little girl
Lying on the floor

It must have been bad
To go through so much harm
But at least she died
With her best friend in her arms

If child abuse makes you sick and you think it's horrible prove it. Re-post this for proof.

Women's Comebacks.

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.

Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.

Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.

Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?

Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
Woman: Really, I'd put f and u together

Man: Your eyes they're amazing.
Woman: Seeing your back would be pretty amazing.

Man: "I know how to please a woman."
Woman: "Then please leave me alone."

Man: "I want to give myself to you."
Woman: "Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."

Man: "I'd go through anything for you."
Woman: "Good! Let's start with your bank account."

Man: "So, wanna go back to my place ?"
Woman: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?"

Man: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?"
Woman: "It's in the phone book."

Man: "But I don't know your name."
Woman: "That's in the phone book too."

Man: "Hey, baby, what's your sign?"
Woman: "Do not Enter"

Man: "Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason"
Woman: "Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!"

Man: "Haven't we met before?"
Woman: "Perhaps. I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic."

If you repost this you will get a phone call 37 minutes after you repost
this...
If you don't resend this then your love life will be doomed for eternity.

GIRLS REPOST THIS AS "female comebacks"
GUYS REPOST THIS AS "don't let this happen