It's not a comic book, it's "Manga"

It's not a cartoon, it's "Anime"

It's not homosexual, it's "Yaoi"

It's not lesbian, it's "Yuri"

It's not erotic, it's "Ecchi"

It's not pedophile, it's "Lolicon"

It's not gay, it's "Shonen-ai"

It's not slutty, it's "Fan Service"

It's not a costume, it's "Cosplay"

It's not a dating show, it's a "Harem"

It's not a fetish, it's "Moe"

It's not a bipolar girl, it's "Tsundere"

It's not a drawing, it's "Doujinshi"

It's not schizophrenic girl, it's "Yandere"

It's not Chinese, it's "Japanese"

It's not Chinese animation, it's "Japanimation"

And most Importantly... I'm not a geek, I'm an "Otaku."

If you are a Proud Otaku, like me, copy this and post it on your wal

Things to do in a shop when you are bored.

1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.

2. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, " 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.

5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

9. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.

10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.

11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme song.

12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.

13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream.. "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"

15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!

16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "pikachu, I choose you!"

Repost this if you laughed... Or are planning to do any of these things

98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile.

If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.

I don't suffer from insanity... I enjoy every minute of it. If you are insane, enjoying every second, and proud of it, copy this and paste it into your profile.

If you are obsessed with something considered childish for someone your age, copy this into your profile. Anime, video games, cartoons, comics, you name it...

I once read that only math can save us now. Put this in your profile if you're screwed.

If you are a Gaara Fanatic copy this into your profile

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.

If you ever suffered from FanFiction withdraw copy this into your profile!

If you think Orochimaru is what you get when Michael Jackson and Voldemort have unprotected sex, C&P this into your profile.

All the good men in this world are either gay, taken, or fictional charaters. Copy if true. It's not fair...-sob-

If you think that life without computers is useless then copy this to your profile.

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile. In class, all the time!

If you have ever had done something or said something that made perfect sense to your real friends and only caused your "peers" to look at you strangely and roll their eyes, copy and paste this into your profile.

98 percent of the population would die if Justin Bieber said it wasn't cool to breathe. Copy this onto your profile if you would be one of the 2 percent that is laughing your ass off.

If you think that writing Fanfic stories is fun then copy this onto your profile!

If you have ever considered going to the dark side since they have cookies, copy this onto your profile.

If your family wonders how you can remember all the naruto character's names, copy and paste this into your profile.

If Fanfiction is to you is what MySpace is to other people, copy this into your profile.

Doing homework sucks. Copy and paste this into your profile if you agree.

.. Put this on your
... page if you have
...O ever pushed a
... door that said pull.
... (Epic Whovian moment)

Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Tsuyu Mikazuki, WeaselChick, Celyna, ShadowShapeshifterAndHerCat, Sanoon, Lord Cargyle, Silverlycan, FamilyRose, Kirallie, Belinda Valentine Bite.

98 percent of teenagers do or have tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who haven't, copy & paste this in your profile.

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile.

If you loved DH, HBP, OotP, GoF, PoA, CoS, and SS/PS, and know what all those initials stand for, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you cried when Fred Weasley died (in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows), and not afraid to admit it, copy, paste this on your profile.

If you love Harry Potter, copy this into your profile.

If you always mentally make the Sirius "serious" pun whenever somebody says, "I'm serious!" copy and paste this into your profile.

If you wanted to punch Remus Lupin in the gut for thinking that he was "too old" for Tonks, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you agree that Tonks is a way better nickname than Dora (as in Nymphadora), copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you agree Pansy Parkinson should be sent to a Dog Kennel, copy and paste this to your profile.

I copy this from Libraria profile because I complitly agree with this and I love it:

In Remembrance:

In Remembrance to Severus Snape,

A Slytherin who died like a Gryffindor,

For his Lily may he have been forgiven in the end.

In Remembrance to Fred Weasley,

Who fought bravely to the very end,

And whose jokes will forever brighten his other half,

And will loyally await his soul mate and brother,

With many jokes,

He's got forever to think of them, right?

In Remembrance to Dobby,

Who was more free and full of love than any elf and most humans;

A truly free elf, may he rest in peace!

In Remembrance to Remus J. Lupin,

The last real Marauder,

Who was not just a wonderful father,

An incredible husband and a brave hero,

But an awesome werewolf too.

In Remembrance to Nymphadora Tonks,

Who died for the greater good,

leaving behind the second Maurader's son,

And would probably hex me for calling her Nymphadora.

In Remembrance to Alastair 'Mad Eye' Moody,

Who's motto 'Constance Vigilance' kept him alive.

In Remembrance to Tom Marvolo Riddle a.k.a Voldemort,

Who was pretty cool and cute when he was younger,

But who got his ass kicked thoroughly in the end.

In Remembrance to Albus Dumbledore,

Whose past and wisdom confused us,

Whose seeming betrayal shocked us,

Who's betrayal we can all understand,

But who actually turned out to be a great guy in the end.

In Remembrance to Bellatrix Lestrange,

Because it was awesome how Molly Weasley got her with the Avada Kedavra,

She deserved everything she got in the end.

In Remembrance to Colin Creevey,

Who we really didn't know too well,

But took a lot of pictures and died fighting in the war,

So he must've done something good...

Besides stalking Harry.

In Remembrance to Hedwig,

Harry's first real friend,

Who lived and died soaring in the night sky.

In Rememberance to Cedric Diggory,

Who was brave and loyal,

A Badger 'till the end,

And stuck by Harry,

Like a true friend.

Really, he was the first victim of the second war.

In Remembrance to Sirius Black,

The man that wasn't a traitor,

The clever genius that broke out of a high security prison,

Swam an ocean as a dog,

Found a traitor, and saved the Saviour.

Also… he made a pretty cute friggin' dog

Homophobia is Wrong!

I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.

I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.

I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.

We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.

I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.

I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.

I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again.

I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.

We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.

I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.

I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.

I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.

I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.

I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.

I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I did not have to always deal with society hating me.

I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.

I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.

I am the person who is afraid of telling his loving Christian parents he loves another male.

Re-post this if you believe homophobia is wrong. Please do your part to end it and you don't have to be gay to do so. I will stand up against anyone who has a problem with homosexuality.

Ninety-eight percent of teenagers have tried smoking pot. If you're one of the two percent who hasn't, copy this and paste it in your profile.

Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent that aren't, copy this, put it in you profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Tsuyu Mikazuki, Weasel Chick, Revenant666, dragonsroar, foxdude33, FallenLex, Soelle, Haunt of twilight, Tiger DeRanged, Belinda Valentine Bite

There are no sexualities. You love who you love and that's that. It's not restricted to one gender, no matter what gender it is. If you agree with me, copy & paste this into your profile.

10 Commandments of a Teenager

1) Thou shall not sneak out when parents are sleeping.(Why wait that long?)

2) Thou shall not do drugs. (Alcohol lasts longer, not to mention being cheaper.)

3) Thou shall not steal from K-Mart. (Wal-Mart has a bigger selection)

4) Thou shall not be arrested for vandalism. (Destruction has a bigger effect)

5) Thou shall not steal from your parents. (Everyone knows grandma has more money)

6) Thou shall not get into fights. (Just start them)

7) Thou shall not skip class. (Just take the whole day off)

8) Thou shall not strip in class. (Hooters pays more)

9) Thou shall not think about having sex. (like Nike says, "Just do it")

10) Thou shall not help old ladies across the street. (Just leave ‘em in the middle)

I AM THE GIRL

I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, Twitter, Facebook because i just don't see the appeal. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment),who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one else seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with Harry Potter, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her (yet it would be nice) and knows the importance of the little things.

Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone.: HarryArtemis1220, edwardcullenissosexy, Pixel Alice, ME LOVEY JAZZY, Gandalf the Grey-Edelwiess, DoYouReallySeeMe, Potter's Angels, CelticHeiressFiona, The Love Dragon, I-am-a-slash-addict, One-Who-Loves-Sesshy, sakurademonalchemist, Belinda Valentine Bite

FANFICTION- UNITED NATIONS!! Has anyone else noticed how a lot of us get along and and make freinds on here we can be from completely different countries? WTF!? We're here making world peace on the INTERNET and we have all those ambassadors and senators and whatever struggling with it!! If you realize this (or read this and agreed) copy and paste this and add your name and country (country is optional) to the list.

SPREAD THE PEACE!!: Naruto-fan-Okami-chan (USA), NaraTemari011 (Puerto Rico), Lala girl in Lalaland (USA), Kakashi Forever (England), ChiyoChiyamamoto (USA), Crazy-Monkey13 (USA), Hullop (USA), Mayonaka Naze (Dominican Republic), RUHLSAR000 (USA) PotterAnimeJackson(Canada), Mermaid-Luchia(Australia), Jostanos (USA), TheBlackSeaReaper (Bermuda), sakurademonalchemist (USA), lokinorsedeity (USA), Belinda Valentine Bite (Portugal),

Top Ten Reasons Why Gay Marriage Is Wrong:

1) Being gay is not natural. Real America has always reject unnatural things like glasses, plastic surgery, and air conditioning.

2) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

3) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and
can sign a marriage contract.

4) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.

5) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed. The sanctity of Brittany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed!

6) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.

7) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

8) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.

9) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.

10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans

Please repost this if you are for gay marriage.

One day, when I was a freshman in high school, I saw a kid from my class was walking home from school.His name was Kyle. It looked like he was carrying all of his books.I thought to myself, 'Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday? He must really be a nerd.' I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friends tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on.
As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him. They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt. His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten feet from him. He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes. My heart went out to him.
So, I jogged over to him as he crawled around looking for his glasses, and I saw a tear in his eye. As I handed him his glasses, I said, 'Those guys are jerks. They really should get lives.'
He looked at me and said, 'Hey thanks!'
There was a big smile on his face.It was one of those smiles that showed real gratitude.I helped him pick up his books, and asked him where he lived. As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked him why I had never seen him before. He said he had gone to private school before now. I would have never hung out with a private school kid before.
We talked all the way home, and I carried some of his books. He turned out to be a pretty cool kid. I asked him if he wanted to play a little football with my friends. He said yes.We hung out all weekend and the more I got to know Kyle, the more I liked him, and my friends thought the same of him.
Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books again.I stopped him and said, 'Boy, you are gonna really build some serious muscles with this pile of books everyday!' He just laughed and handed me half the books.
Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends.. When we were seniors we began to think about college. Kyle decided on Georgetown and I was going to Duke.
I knew that we would always be friends, that the miles would never be a problem. He was going to be a doctor and I was going for business on a football scholarship. Kyle was valedictorian of our class. I teased him all the time about being a nerd. He had to prepare a speech for graduation.I was so glad it wasn't me having to get up there and speak.
Graduation day, I saw Kyle. He looked great.He was one of those guys that really found himself during high school. He filled out and actually looked good in glasses. He had more dates than I had and all the girls loved him. Boy, sometimes I was jealous!
Today was one of those days.I could see that he was nervous about his speech. So, I smacked him on the back and said, 'Hey, big guy, you'll be great!' He looked at me with one of those looks (the really grateful one) and smiled. 'Thanks,' he said.
As he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began, 'Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you make it through those tough years. Your parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach... but mostly your friends... I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the best gift you can give them. I am going to tell you a story.' I just looked at my friend with disbelief as he told the story of the first day we met. He had planned to kill himself over the weekend. He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his Mom wouldn't have to do it later and was carrying his stuff home.
He looked hard at me and gave me a little smile. 'Thankfully, I was saved. My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable.' I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular boy told us all about his weakest moment.
I saw his Mom and dad looking at me and smiling that same grateful smile. Not until that moment did I realize it's depth.
Never underestimate the power of your actions. With one small gesture you can change a person's life. For better or for worse. God puts us all in each others lives to impact one another in some way. Look for God in others.
You now have two choices, you can :1) Put this on your profile or 2) Forget you read this and act like it didn't touch your heart. As you can see, I took choice number 1.
'Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.'
There is no beginning or end.. Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift.

They say "guns don't kill people; people kill people", but I think guns help. If you just stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you would kill too many people.

She's my best friend. Break her heart and I'll break your face.

I'm the type of girl who will burst out laughing in dead silence over something that happened a year ago.

Real friends don't let you do stupid things... alone.

It takes 47 muscles to frown, 13 to smile and absolutely none to sit there with a dumb look on your face.

Don't count the days, make the days count

Yeah, the grass may be greener, but it's just as hard to mow

Be thankful for what you have, because it's probably more than most

I dream of a better world where chickens can cross the road without having their motives questioned

I'm not crazy, you're just more sane than I am

I smile because I have no idea what's going on!

Stressed is Desserts backwards :)

Of all the things I’ve lost, I miss my mind the most.

You're laughing now because you're older than me by mere months, but when you 30 and I'm still 29, who will be laughing then?

Where's the good in goodbye?

We all smile in the same language

Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift, that's why we call it the present!

Therapy is expensive. Popping bubble wrap is cheap. You choose.

Ever stop to think, and forget to start again? (Yep!)

I am in shape...round is a shape

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and be quiet

Our health teacher told us that "1 out of 3 people who start smoking will eventually die." The other two apparently became immortal.

Intelligence has limits, stupidity deosn't.

Smile...it confuses people!

Ifyoucanreadthisthenyouarewaytoosmartforyourowngood.

If it wasn't for electricity, we would all be watching TV by candle light.

A balanced diet is a piece of chocolate in each hand

He who laughs last thinks slowest

We could all take a lesson from crayons: some are sharp, some are beautiful, some have weird names, all are different colors, but they still learn to live in the same box.

You laugh because I'm different. I laugh because you're all the same

Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid

A positive attitude may not solve all of your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort

“When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it, whilst sipping the grape juice.”

A recent survey stated that the average person’s greatest fear is having to give a speech in public. Somehow this ranked even higher than death which was third on the list. So, you’re telling me that at a funeral, most people would rather be the guy in the coffin than have to stand up and give a eulogy.

Death is God’s way of saying “You’re fired.” Suicide is Human’s way of saying “You can’t fire me- I quit!” (And I think that pisses God off a lot)

STRESS: A condition brought on by over-riding the body's desire to choke the living daylights out of some jerk who desperately deserves it.

“Heaven won’t take me and Hell’s afraid I’ll take over.”

I bought a Michael Jackson album, he died. I bought an Amy Winehouse album, then she died. I bought an I Phone, then Steve Jobs died. Hold on a sec... I should buy a Justin Biber album. (grins evilly)

Wikipedia - I know everything! Google - I have everything! Facebook - I know everybody! Internet - Without me you are all nothing! Electricity - keep talking bitches!

The word 'politics' is derived from the word 'poly', meaning 'many', and the word 'ticks', meaning 'blood sucking parasites'.

Weird is good. Strange is bad. Odd is what you call someone who you can't decide what to call them. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, which means weird is good! If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!

If it completely pisses you off when someone says being gay is gross, then copy and paste this into your profile.

If you don't have a problem with homosexuality, copy this into your profile.

If you think you cannot live without music, copy this into your profile.

If you daydream 24/7, copy this to your profile.

If you have ever fallen off a chair backwards, copy and paste this in your profile.

There is nothing wrong with any religion, race, sexual orientation, or gender. If you believe in tolerance towards all people. copy this paste it on your profile.

A simple friend wonders about your romantic history. A real friend could blackmail you with it.

A simple friend doesn't know your parents' first names A real friend has their phone numbers in his address book.

A simple friend, when visiting, acts like a guest. A real friend opens your refrigerator and helps themselves.

A good friend will comfort you when he rejects you. A best friend will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

A good friend will be there for you when he breaks up with you. A best friend will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."

A good friend helps you up when you fall. A best friend keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?"

A good friend helps you find your prince. A best friend kidnaps him and brings him to you.

A good friend will ask you if you're okay when you're crying. A best friend will hand you a Kleenex and ask you “Who do I have to kill?”

A good friend will offer you a soda. A best friend will dump theirs on you.

A good friend will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month. A best friend will throw you a tampon and push you in.

A good friend gives you their umbrella in the rain. A best friend takes yours and says, "Run, bitch, run!"

A good friend will help you move. A best friend will help you move the bodies.

A good friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"

A good friend convinces you not to jump off the cliff. A best friend hugs you "Goodbye, I'll miss you. Can I have your

Professor Flitwick … does not know where Snow White is.

Professor Snape … has no wish to get in touch with his ‘feminine side’.

Professor Lupin … has no need for a flea collar. Ever.

Professor Moody … the best ‘teaching’ Hoqwarts has seen in a while.

Professor McGonagall … does not take herself too seriously. It is a bad idea to tell her.

Professor Dumbledore … should be referred to as ‘Professor’, ‘Headmaster’ or ‘Sir’, not ‘Dude’, ‘My Leige’ or ‘Tim the Enchanter’.

Harry Potter … is more Emo than Draco Malfoy.

Draco Malfoy … disagrees.

Hermione Granger … has PMS and a wand.

Ron Weasley … is very afraid.

Luna Lovegood … is perfectly sane, thanks very much.

Ginny Weasley … wants her Hogwarts toilet seat.

Fred Weasley … knows if he and his twin giggle at an idea for more than fifteen seconds, they may assume that it’s against the rules and therefore should not carry it out.

George Weasley … knows he and his twin will carry it out and are not remotely sorry.

Lily Evans … swears she is not in love with James Potter.

James Potter … doesn’t believe her.

Remus Lupin … would prefer less jokes about ‘his time of the month’.

Sirius Black … killed by drapery.

Andromeda Black … is going to marry a muggle – screw the consequences.

Bellatrix Black … is 'quietly' going insane.

Narcissa Black … would like a new hairbrush.

Lucius Malfoy … does not like to be referred to as ‘Luscious Mouthful’.

Voldemort … does not think it would be funny if HP were to put on earmuffs and pulled out a mandrake in his presence.

Gryffindors … will jump off a cliff.

Slytherins … will push someone else off.

Hufflepuffs… will call five hundred others and build a staircase.

Ravenclaws … will get hold of a flying carpet.

I saw this on my friends profile and I had to have it...

The Stupidest Things Written

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (Too late!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (As night follows day . . .)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (But wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (One would hope.)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (As opposed to what?)

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (I gotta admit, I'm curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (Talk about a news flash.)

On artificial bacon: "Real artificial bacon bits". (So we don't get fake fake bacon. Oh no we get real fake bacon.)

On a Myer hairdryer:"Do not use while sleeping."(Darn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:"Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."(Wow. That's really helpful)

On a child's superman costume:"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly". (Aw, that's the whole purpose of buying the costume!)

On a Swedish chainsaw:"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals".(Was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

On a package of pasta after the cooking instructions:"Put on fork and eat."(No! Really? We're supposed to eat food?!)

On a bar of Palmolive soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (And that would be how??)

On some frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (But, it's just a suggestion).

On a Korean kitchen knife: "Warning: keep out of children". (hmm..something must have been lost in translation...)

On a bag of Fritos: "You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside". (The shoplifter special!)

If you can read this message, you are blessed because over two billion people in the world cannot read at all:

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty

uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal

pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a

rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't

mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the

olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer

be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl

mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.

Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed

ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling

was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!

If you could read that put it in your profile

OBITUARY FOR THE LATE MR. COMMON SENSE

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense,who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and Maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6 year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get Parental consent to administer Calpol, sun lotion, or a band-aid to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 3 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.

A moment of silence.

THE END

Dude I hate these things but I am very superstitious: This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her in the ground when she was still alive. The murderer chanted,"Toma sota balcu" as he buried her. Now that you have read the chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this in your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded.

"There are two infinite things.The Universe and Human stupidity.I'm not so sure about the universe..."-Albert Einstein

"I don't Care if you're Black, White, Straight, Bisesexual, gay, Lesbian, short, tall, fat, skinny rich or poor. If you're nice to me I'll be nice to you"-Eminem

"An eye for an eye would only make the world go blind.An eye for an eye is a terrible way of thought.If we followed it nobody would have an eye.Only one shall see,for one must see to take out the last eye,and then the world will fail..."-JonathanMagistad

"Being blind can shave off Ignorance,but it can also leave an uncanny sense of doubt and strip color from your life.Now that's a truly tragic thing.Revenge,For the sake of revenge,can leave a bitter taste on the tip of the tongue"-AlienEyes

You can either stay in the shallow end of the pool,or You can go out into the Ocean - Christopher Reed

"You can never cross the Ocean until you have the courage to lose sight of the shore- Colombus

We've all got both light and dark inside us. What matters is the part we choose to act on. That's who we really are.

-Sirius Black

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

"Me? I'm dishonest, and with a dishonest man, you can always trust him to be dishonest. Honestly, its the honest ones you have to watch out for because you never know when he's going to turn around and do something incredibly stupid."
--Jack Sparrow

“How about this? The chances are better for Snape to suddenly declare his open armed support for inter-house unity by standing in the middle of a busy hallway and shouting ‘HOUSE UNITY HUG SANDWICH! SLYTHERIN MEAT!’ at which point Sirius and Remus could come up and warmly cuddle him in their arms simultaneously to which he would reply ‘I’m warm and toasty like pastrami caressed with wonder bread.’”
--Elvin Child by labarynth-mind

“Whatever my grievances, Headmaster,” She said in a dead-on impression of Dumbledore. “I am sure I can address them best by pinning you to the outer wall of your castle and skinning you alive. Knife?” She asked in the exact same tone Dumbledore had used and opened her cloak to reveal lines and lines of glittering weapons.
--Had I Known by kalyl silverstorm

"What are you even going to do with six kids for a month?" Sam said.
"What did I do with you when you were twelve?" Dean said.
"You taught me how to fire a shotgun, and we salted and burned my pet goldfish after it died," Sam said.
--Old Country (Fanfiction) by astolat

"We could summon Death, point to Voldemort and say 'that one'."
Severus kept a straight face. "I hadn't considered that."
--Pursuing by Kayelle

Fear cannot touch me. It can only taunt me, it cannot take me away, just tell me where to go. I can either follow, or stay in my bed. I can hold on to the things that I know. The dead stay dead, they cannot walk. The shadows are darkness. And darkness can’t talk.’- Almost Here

That's right! Run bitch! Run I say! FASTER! Is that all you got? - By a very disturbing cat

"Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget to sing in the lifeboats" - Voltaire

"I'll date him when hell freezes over!"..."Hell must've froze over." - ?

"Fire at will!" "Don't shoot at me!" - ?

"Screw the weekend, I WANT SUMMER!" - Lady Alseroen