Hi. I'm Flaming Flo... flamin' bad fanfics everywhere

MY TOP 10 MOST HATED THINGS ABOUT BAD FANFICTION:

1... R U AU?
What is the point of putting already created characters into scenarios and environments they'd never be in?
Why make a character a vampire? What's the point of out of character? There is none.
If you have this fantastic idea, hey, make your own characters and be a little creative for once in your life?!

2... Rotten Lemons
A nice lemon is good every now and then.
They are sweet and tart and can be the perfect addition, garnish, or drop to any fanfic to make it the perfect mix.
Lemons gone wrong... are just bad. So very bad. Don't do them, you sick bastards. Parodies OK.

3... Foreign Indelicacies
"Hai," Jenny said to her friend with long hair and green eyes.
This is just low class in my opinion. You are a Weeaboo, and it's annoying.
If you meant for these characters to be Japanese, why are you translating some words and not others?

4... There eating her, then their gonna eat me... ohmygod!!!
Bad Engrish is sometimes excusable, especially when the author's first language isn't English. I can understand.
Then again... you others should know better. If you wanna be a writer, even a fake one, at least know the basics.
Reading a fanfic should be for pleasure, it shouldn't feel like I'm grading a 4th grader.

5... $ongfics
Know this, there are no exceptions... maybe just a few?... no, not really.
This is not an AMV. Annoying song lyrics between paragraphs is not helping the mood to my reading.
I don't know about anyone else, but when I see "songfic" I run long and hard away.

6... Fanfic cherry
I prefer a writer with a little more "experience" per say, someone who knows what they're doing, you know?
Every other fic on fanfiction is probably someone's cherry fic. Maybe don't announce it like it's a warning.
They are usually just like the first time: awkward, a bit painful, and over quickly

7... Insert A/N
Stop explaining things IN the fic (A/N: he tells me to burn things) and breaking the 4th wall.
If you were a good author, you wouldn't have to explain things like that, or giggle or make a comment.
Author's Notes are okay at the beginning and/or end of a fic, not in the freakin' belly of the beast!

8... Mary-So-Sue-Me
They will always exist as long as there are female fans to obsess over male fictional characters.
I especially hate it when people defend their Sue as not one, even though they blatantly are.
Inserting a personification of yourself in a fic is self-absorbed and pretty childish and selfish. Kind of like me.

9... Abandon Fic!!!
Fics that have been left unfinished even when they were really good!
They just leave you hanging, forever into the ether of cyberspace and some dummy's kindle.
And one-shots. Especially when they consist of only 5 paragraphs. Stop wasting paper! Er, online paper...

10... Fan-Fic-fact
Genma is not a ladies man, or he is in the fanfiction universe... poor guy.
When writers have read so many other fanfictions of a genre, they all begin to portray a character how the other author did.
A chain reaction trickles down until everyone just "assumes" the character is like he is even though he was nothing like that in the series!

Top 10 loved things about fanfiction (cuz I'm not a complete bitch... well...)

1. Good fics! small percentage but still there. A diamond in a pile of shit.
2. Reviews. They can be bad, but mostly just amusing. Trolls are fun.
3. Bad fanfics. When you find that so-bad-it's-good fanfic, it just makes your day
4. Lemons and smut. I like a good, guilty pleasure now and then.
5. Finding closure through a fanfic. When the series ended too soon, or not to your liking, well screw them!
6. Community! One of my best friends I met through fanfiction. Yes, she's real.
7. Practice. While you may suck, you won't know you suck till someone else points it out. Flames encouraged!
8. Just being able to be silly through the obscurity, promiscuity, and fabrication of reality that is the internet.
9. Inspiration. When a reader gets inspired enough to draw a pic of a fic, that is just awesome.
10. Did you know fanfiction is actually against the law? Breaching copyright? Yep, and doesn't it feel good to be a rebel???