Rengoku Akashi
 Author has written 2 stories for Naruto, and Misc. Anime/Manga. name - call me ren, goku, rengoku, aka, shi, or akashi music artists - three days grace breaking benjamin, cobra starship, B.O.B., AFI, my chemical romance, bowling for soup, 3 doors down, avril lavigne, dashboard confessional, paramore, and others that would take too long to list manga - soul eater, vampire knight, bleach, death note, night school, kuroshitsuji (black butler), kingdom hearts anime - bleach, naruto, vampire knight age - between 12 and 20, figure it out your selves things I like in a fanfic - fem naru, strong team 7,fem naru/shika, yoai is alright I guess things I hate in a fanfic - mary sue's, overly strong people, misspelling, plagiarizing things I like - music, reading, purple, black, blue, red, fruit (mostly the mango), my two awesome akatsuki and yoai fangirl best friends,my awesome normal people best friends, science, and art P.S.- Renji is AWESOME! P.S.S. - Itachi is SEXY!!! like you didn't already know that... IMPORTANT - This account is now being shared between me, Lia, and Sarah (A.K.A akatsuki and yaoi fangirl bestfriends) IMPORTANT UPDATE ON WE'RE AS GOOD AS GONE- we are BACK BABY!!!!!!!!!! Kiba went to "The Virgin Islands" and when he left they had to change the name to just "The Islands" Sarah: Damn right!!! LIA'S STUFF :3 All time favorite YAOI fics that I've at least reread four times each.These are all tied for first. They're all on Favorites! +Crimson Door by Blackened Wing. (Vampire Knight : Kaname x Zero) IT'S AMAZING!!!! Right now I'm rereading this one. *Midnight Memories by Daydreamer79. (Naruto : Sasuke x Naruto) IT MADE ME CRY!!!! It also made me support Itachi x Pein! ~Strawberry Bad Boy by Mistress Penelopye. (Bleach : Grimmjow x Ichigo) ADDICTING IN SO MANY WAYS!!!! I am now a fan of Nnoitora x Shinji! GUYS I LOVE/ WANT TO RAPE ;3 1. Itachi Uchiha (Naruto) 2. Neji Hyuuga (Naruto) 3. Kisame Hoshigaki (Naruto) 4. Toshiro Hitsugaya (Bleach) 5. Kenpachi Zaraki (Bleach) 6. Xerxes Break (Pandora Hearts) 7. Grell Sutcliff (Kuroshitsuji)~actually he'd probably be #4 and he dosen't belong here because he's gay but I love that flaming homo and i would still rape him! He's a Butler to Die for! GUYS I LOVE and would still rape THAT LOOK TOO GOOD IN A YAOI PAIRING XD (no order) (from Naruto) Deidara Sasori Hidan Kakuzu Pein Sasuke (Bastard hurt my Alice(fom Consider Yourselves Kitties its on favorites check it out or i'll hunt you down and force you)!!!*suppressing urge to kill*...*failing miserably* Naruto Kakashi Iruka (from Bleach) Byakuya (Renji's property) Urahara Ichigo Shinji Nnoitora Grimmjow (Grimm-kitty! X3)seme... in everything. Ulquiorra (Ulqui-chan) Szayelaporro (from FMA) ED Roy Envy (Sarah will kill me but he's hot and deserves a spot on the list!) (BITCH KEEP TO UR OWN MEN!!!!!!!!!!-Sarah) (from Kuroshitsuji) Sebastian Ciel Undertaker (from Pandora Hearts) Gilbert Oz (from Vampire Knight) Kaname Zero l、 l、 ~ヽ YAY A KITTY!!! :3 RIP Itachi Uchiha 6/9/86-3/13/08 He shall live on in our hearts! - SOBS- WHY ITACHI,WHY?!! -strokes Itachi headband- He'll come back i know it! RIP Deidara 5/5/88-7/20/07 He shall live on in our hearts! -This is for you Sarah If you want to slap Naruto for not noticing Hinata, copy and paste this into your profile. If you hate Karin from Naruto and hope she dies at the hands of Sasuke, copy and paste this into your profile. If your idea of a party is gorging on pizza and cracking stupid jokes with your best friends, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy this into your profile If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile. Deidara will never be forgotten and will live on in our hearts. If you think this PLEASE copy and paste this in your profile. If you get good grades and still know nothing at all, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you believe that everyone in the world is a baka, copy and paste this on your profile If you like chocolate as much as I do, copy this in your profile. If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile. If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile. If you have ever laughed so hard you either choked, hyperventilated, had your sides cramp, or all of the above copy and paste this on your profile If you love Naruto so much you wish the characters were real so you could be one of them, copy and paste this on your profile. If you have your own little world, copy and paste this on your profile. If you are obsessed with something considered childish for someone your age, copy this into your profile. If you've ever threatened a computer or video game console, copy and paste this into your profile. If you are a Gaara Fanatic copy this into your profile. If you hear voices of the Naruto characters in your head...copy and paste this on your profile. Post this on your profile if you have ever had a major fan girl moment. If you believe that Naruto is the Best Anime out there then copy and paste this onto your page to spread the word. If you believe Bleach is the BEST Anime out there then copy and paste this onto your page to spread the word. If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile. All the good men in this world are either gay, taken, or fictional characters. Copy if true. It's not fair...-goes into emo corner- If you talk to yourself and aren't afraid to admit it to anyone, copy and paste this in your profile. If you often laugh maniacally when you're all by yourself, please copy and paste this into your profile. If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile. ~~If you think Akatsuki rule,put this on ur profile!!~~ If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile. If you have ever had done something or said something that made perfect sense to your real friends and only caused your "peers" to look at you strangely and roll their eyes, copy and paste this into your profile. ಠ_ಠ(-\) WEE! ART IS A BANG! UN If you have ever said that an anime character is sexy and you love them and you mean it, copy and paste this into your profile. If you think that writing Fanfic stories is fun then copy this onto your profile! If you know a video game/book/movie/anime/manga character or weapon that need(s) to exist, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have EVER yelled at a TV after getting frustrated at someone who can't hear you, put this on your profile. If you have ever considered going to the dark side since they have cookies, copy this onto your profile. If you ever spouted a naruto character quote on command, copy and paste this into your profile. If you're obsessed with writing/reading fan fictions with an OCxCharacter coupling, copy and paste this. If Fanfiction is to you is what MySpace is to other people, copy this into your profile. Doing homework sucks. Copy and paste this into your profile if you agree. If you have ever said that an anime character is sexy and you love them and you mean it, copy and paste this into your profile. If you are antisocial sometimes, copy and paste. -If you think that o/_\o looks like Itachi, copy this into your profile. -If you think Orochimaru is what you get when Michael Jackson and Voldemort have unprotected sex, C&P this into your profile -If Orochimaru creeps the shit out of you,copy and paste this onto your profile and add your name. Lily, The Crazy Evil Akatsuki Neko, Mood-chan-SIRIUS IS UBER HOT, VampireArgonian92, NejiTenfanforever, Deidara-Kun-Fangirl, KingofRandomness, Dragonfly51, Gaaras1Girl,Lazy'girl-chan, Deidara Lover, DaniZaraki, Rengoku Akashi -If you have ever tripped over your own feet, C&P this into your profile. -If you've ever tried to put your hair behind your ears and ended up poking yourself in the eye, copy this into your profile. If you think that those stupid kids should just give that God-forsaken Trix rabbit some Trix, copy this into your profile If you think that it would be fun to be a cartoon, copy this message into your profile. If you wish that a fictional character was real, copy and paste this to your profile. If you think that the Akatsuki is cool but Zetsu is AWESOME!!, copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever wondered what Kisame would taste like as Sushi, copy and paste this into your profile. If you think Tobi should run for president, copy and paste this onto your profile and add your name!: Rengoku Akashi IF YOU BELIEVE THAT ITACHI IS NOT DEAD, PLEASE COPY AND PASTE!! If you wish Sasori, Deidara, Itachi, Hidan and Kakuzu didn't have to die, copy and paste this onto your profile andadd your name: Sand Siblings Rule, Chocolate random pie10,SakuraAkatsuki101, HiHi-Ai!, ItaSakuxTenshi!, XxXDeidara LoverXxX, DaniZaraki, Rengoku Akashi If you're conviced Gaara is not emo, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you like yaoi as much as I do, copy this in your profile. I'M TALKING ABOUT YAOI GOODNESS!!!! Num Num Num *munching on Loveless and Junjou Romantica* ROMANTICA FOREVER!!!! It takes 42 muscles to frown, but it only takes four to extend my middle finger and tell you to bite me. Karin is so ugly, not even Naruto can believe it! Put that in your profile if you despise Karin (aka the MEGA-slut), hope she dies! GOMEN to any Karin fans, but if you do hate her I LUV YOU! Translations: Japan - English (((not by me!))) Merii kurisumasu = Happy Christmas Haru = Spring Oh Kami = Oh God Nakama = It can mean friend, but has a much stronger meaning to it like: Super-duper-bestest-friend-in-the-whole-wide-world-where-nothing-can-ever-ever-ever-EVER-tear-us-apart... Koibito / Amate = Lover (had to put it thinkin of JUNJOU ROMANTICA!!!) Koi = Love Koishii = Dearest / Sweetheart Gaki = Brat Chikushou = D*mn/Sh*t/F*ck knife thing _.¶0_ NAUTO BIRTHDAYS (Have to have some dango ready for June 9) January February March April May 05 - Deidara June 01- Mikoto (Sasuke's mother) 06 - Gouzu & Meizu July August September October November December 20 QUESTIONS WITH THE AKATSUKI: 1. Who is your favourite character? Itachi 2.What do you think of the whole Madara being Tobi-thing? Sad but true. I prefer Tobi. He's like the love child of the Akastuki. 3. Who would you be team-up with? I could get along with any of the teams but most likely Itachi and Kisame. 4. If you could have any abilities what would they be? Fire!!!! BURN BITCHES!!!!!BURN!!! 5. If Madara came up to you and asked you "Wanna' go somewhere private and have some 'fun'?" how would you react? Ask him if killing him was the fun he was talking about and threaten to castrate him and feed his last chance to rebuild the Uchiha clan to Zetsu if he tried anything. *smile sweetly* I love you Madara! 6. Hidan comes in your room and starts ranting on about how Kakuzu pisses him off then begs you to convert to Jashinism, how do you react? Type him up a long list of ways to piss Kuzu off but only give it to him if he makes me a Jashinist! Then help him with the list because Kuzu cant kill me now that I'm immortal!!! 7. Zetsu is standing in the corner of the living room, and he shows you a rose, he asks what you think of it, how do you react? Say "Pretty rose, Zetsu." Then later ask Sasori what he got for the wedding and show him the vase you got for Zetsu's kids. 8. Itachi is sitting in the kitchen, drinking tea, however, when you come into the kitchen to grab a drink, he starts smiling at you. Thinking you have something on your face you almost run from the room, only to be stopped by Itachi. He asks if he can brush your hair, because he admires how soft and long it is, how do you react? Blink in total surprise and confusion but let him. then when he's done offer to do his hair and nails and talk about how sexy he is while doing so. 9. Kakuzu has been quiet for a week, and one day when you're alone he walks up to you and asks you if you have any spare change and if you'd like to go food shopping, how do you react? Umm, ok, but only if i can take my son Tobi. (He's mine and Itachi's love child) 10. Once upon a time before you 'joined' Akatsuki, you were good friends with Naruto, he'd been tracking you for years-almost as much as he does with Sasuke. When he finally finds you and begs you to come back to the village with him, how do you react? Tell him i left to spy on Akatsuki, go with him, but half way to the village i knock him out then give him to Itachi as a proposal gift. 11. Upon stumbling into Ino and Sakura bitch-fighting about how pretty they are and who's-more-skilled-than-who, what do you do? Step in, stab them both to death then write in their own blood on their foreheads 'Lia Rockz'. 12. Who's art is better? Deidara's or Sasori's? I Refuse to Answer the Impossible! 13. You tell them you think your art is better, and they begin a huge argument about how your art isn't as great as theirs, what do you do? Sarcasm Battle!!!!! 14. Kisame asks if you want to go swimming-your answer? Agree only if he can get Itachi to come in a spedo. 15. For the next two days Kisame goes around asking Itachi and finally tells you he cant get him to swim with you and him. What is your reaction? Say i'll only go swimming if he lets me ride on his back ke a horse! Yay!!! 16. What are your views on Sasuke? He’s a dumbass. The little idiot doesn’t understand that his revenge is on the wrong person cuz it’s Madara’s fault. Go kill him, not your innocent and loving older brother. plus he needs a hair cut. 17. Rock Lee tells you he has a crush on you, your reaction? Give him a naughty naked picture of Gaara and hopes he goes to the Sand village chasing his new love. 18. Which is better? Manga or Anime? Anime. I like having sound and color that my unimaginative mind is to lazy to think of. 19. Which village would you prefer to live in? RAIN! All Hail Lord PEIN! ~final question~ 20. Which Naruto coupling do you prefer more? NaruHina! Pray to Jashin-sama it comes true! MY Mother. 1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. 2. My mother taught me RELIGION. 3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. 4. My mother taught me LOGIC. 5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. 6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. 7. My mother taught t me IRONY. 8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS. 9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. 10. My mother taught me about STAMINA. 11. My mother taught me about WEATHER. 12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY. 13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE. 14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. 15. My mother taught me about ENVY. 16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION. 17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING. 18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE. 19. My mother taught me ESP. 20. My mother taught me HUMOR. 21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT. 22. My mother taught me GENETICS. 23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS. 24. My mother taught me WISDOM. 25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE. Zetsu (Carnivorus Planterius) Sasori (Fakeus Apparatus) Deidara (Explodus Homosexus) XD Itachi (Hazzardous Handicapus) XD so true Hidan (Smartus Assus) XD Kisame (Aquarlus Hybridus) Kakuzu (Freakous Phenominus) XD can't argue with that Konan (Vaginus maximus) Tobi (Reallyus Madaraus) XD your damn straight Pain (Fearlus Leaderus) the akatsuki classification :D This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her when she was still alive. The murder chanted, "Toma Sota balcu," as he buried her. Now that you have read this chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this on your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded. there were 3girls They were looking through peoples The girl slowly came upon this one It had creatures in the background and the man She started laughing with her friend commenting on how ugly he was. Right then, an instant message came up. It said: SatanStalker: So how do u like my XxLoVemExX: What?? XxLoVemExX: Who is this anyway?? SatanStalker: Well, you should know; XxLoVemExX: How do you know that im looking at ur pro?? SatanStalker:I know when people look at my MySpace. XxLoVemExX: What? That doesnt make SatanStalker: I just do. Satanstalker: Especially to pretty girls like you. Satanstalker: With very nice legs I might say. At the time the girl was wearing high She started to pull them down a little bit to cover what XxLoVemExX: Ok whatever man youre starting to scare the living sht out of me. SatanStalker: You should be afraid. SatanStalker: You wouldnt want an ugly guy like me touching your legs huh? I mean thats what you They were in shock. Her friend: Holy crap man just block him The girl: Ok holy crap, you think hes SatanStalker: I am. SatanStalker: Well it wouldnt really XxLoVemExX: What? My house? SatanStalker: Yeah, youre alone so its XxLoVemExX: Ok I think Im going to leave now because youre freaking me out. SatanStalker: Your screen name says SatanStalker has just signed off. The girl and her friend were really friend: Whatever lets just go upstairs trust me I doubt hes really coming. Its just a joke from someone. They went upstairs and were having a pillow fight. All of a sudden the girls friend said she had to go to the bathroom. The girl said ok. Ten minutes later the girl noticed that her friend was She goes and knocks but no one said she opens it and finds her friend there on her neck sliced with blood all over the ground. with her head nailed to the wall. Just her head. If you do not repost this in the next two one in your room, and one killing your parents at that Tonight at 1:30am. Well what are you waiting for? Repost or you are going to die These are actually on the labels. On Sears hairdryer: On a bag of Fritos: On a bar of Dial soap: On some Swann frozen dinners: On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box) On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: On packaging for a Rowenta iron: On Boot's Children's cough medicine: On Nytol sleep aid: On a Korean kitchen knife: On a string of Christmas lights: On a food processor: On Sainsbury's peanuts: On artificial bacon: On an American Airlines packet of nuts: On a Swedish chainsaw: On a child's Superman costume: On an American Flag: At Funplex: Next to a kid's place: In a Parking Lot: QUOTES TO LIVE BY Do not use an axe to kill a fly on your friends' head. Most people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them. Vampires vs. Werewolves...It's kinda like pirates vs ninjas, but cooler Firefighter: At one point we decided to fight fire with fire... Well...basically... your house burned even faster. I ran into my ex the other day, then I put the car in reverse and ran over him again. Too often, we lose sight of life's simple pleasures. Remember, when someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles in your face to frown, BUT it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and slap that jerk upside the head "Some people are like Slinkies. They're really good for nothing. But they still really bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs." Apparently 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. And there are five people in my family so it must be one of them. Either it's my mom or my dad. Or my older brother Collin. Or my other brother Ho-Chan-Chu. I think it's Collin. Friends will always be like "well you deserve better" but best friends will be prank calling him saying "you will die in seven days" Guns don't kill people. I do. My imaginary friend doesn't like you either. Flying is simple. You just throw yourself at the ground and miss. Taste the rainbow- Eat CRAYONS The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources. The spontaneous rally will begin at 1:45. Assassinations is an extreme form of censorship. I'll be rich and famous when I invent something that will stab people over the internet I've got ADD and magic markers. Oh the fun I will have. Somebody needs a Happy Meal. Please Note: CHRISTMAS IS CANCELED Apparently you told Santa that you have been good this year...he died laughing. I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. I am going to put an end to my procrastination problem. . . Tomorrow To put it nicely, I hope you choke. If Tylenol, Duct Tape, & a Band Aid can't fix it, you have a serious problem. Would you like a cookie? So would I. You don't have to be faster than the bear, you just have to be faster than the slowest guy running from the bear. Well the voices and I took a vote. It's unanimous; you suck. A day without sunshine is like... night. A rejected invention:Instant water! just add water! Don't ever attempt a staring contest with a brick wall, they cheat a lot Don't make me mad...I'm known to bite at random!! Don't walk in my footsteps. I walk into walls. I am nobody. Nobody is perfect. Therefore, I am perfect! I put the 'fun' in 'dysfunctional'. I'm hearing voices in my head and they don't like you! If you wish on a falling star it might come true... Unless it's a meteor hurdling to earth... Then no wishes come true... Unless your wish was to be killed a meteor hurdling to earth. Someday my prince will come he just took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions. Okay...so there's this thing called retarded-ness and me and my freinds, well...We've gone pro. If you enjoy those copy and paste thingies, copy and paste this to your profile. Copy this and paste it on your profile if you think sarcasm is a conditioned reflex. If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile If you think the world is heading to a bad place, and are planning on doing something about it by making wonderful stories, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you're a girl who's tired of people assuming that just because your a girl you love pink and can't fight to save your life, copy and paste this into your profile. (It's funny as hell when i kick their ass, though) "Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia- Fear of long words." If you have embarrassing memories that make you want to slap yourself/someone else, put this on your profile. ((Walking down memory lane) (Slap) WHY DID I DO THAT?! T_T) If you've ever seen a movie or so many times you can quote it word for word and you do at random times or when the moment seems to need a quote; put this in your profile If you think Writer's Block is evil, put this in your profile. The problem with reality is a lack of background music.- unknown I laugh in the face of death...maybe not laugh more like a snicker...a quiet snicker, and I wouldn't do it directly in death's face so, it's more like a quiet snicker behind death's back. It takes 82 muscles to frown, and only 4 to stick up you middle finger to tell somebody to bite me. I know at least three people who would love to push me down the stairs If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile. I'm the girl that when my feet touch the ground in the morning the devil says; "OH CRAP SHE'S UP!" If you hear the characters from Naruto in your head, copy and paste this in your profile. If you believe the characters from Naruto in your head are real, copy and paste this in your profile. If you believe the characters are real permanently, copy and paste this in your profile. If your friends are WEIRD (But not as weird as you) put this on your profile. If you believe Itachi has secret laughing fits when no one is watching, copy and paste this in your profile If you have EVER yelled at a TV after getting frustrated at someone who can't hear you, put this on your profile If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile If you have ever tripped down the stairs copy this into your profile. If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile If you hear voices in your head, copy and paste this onto your profile! If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile. If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy this into your profile. If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile. If you have ever been so wrapped up thinking about anime, anime fan art, or anime fanfictions that you zoned out and came back to reality 5 minutes or more later with no idea of what's going on, copy and paste this to your profile and add your name to the list. Athame Kunoichi, Sugarmonkey778, A Ninja Named Frank, Banryuwielder244, angelic memories, philippinocherryblossom, Nyanonymous, craZy_goth_friendZ, jinxedpixie kindalkiddwashere AkatsukiFreak31, Lady Yuuki,deixsaso, obsidianLight16, Rengoku Akashi 93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile and add your name to the list: Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Evil Genius of the COCA, Invader Miley Phantom, dAnnYsGiRl777, BloodySalvation, Lady Lost-A-Lot, bellabookworm9, Bella Masen Cullen, LiveForInsanity, Billvy, Sheena Is A Punk Rocker, BluCmonkE, Lifeless Heartless, Lady Yuuki,deixsaso, obsidianLight16, Rengoku Akashi If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list:danyan, Zutara Lover, Archangel's Requiem, Lady Sakura of the Fated,Animefangirlforever, Rethira, BluCmonkE, Lady Yuuki,deixsaso, obsidianLight16, Rengoku Akashi If you have ever said that an anime character is sexy and you love them and you mean it, copy and paste this into your profile 'Dream as if you’ll live forever… 'Don't get mad; get sadistic.' If you think everyone's out of their minds (including yourself...but that's a given), copy and paste this to your profile If people think you are mentally insane...copy this into your profile If they are right...copy and paste this into your profile Only crazy people can understand the brilliance of crazy things. If you are crazy and proud of it, C&P! If you've ever walked into a doorway you could have clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and Chu! If you're against animal cruelty (horse slaughter, bear bating, dolphin hunting, chimp slavery etc. then copy this into your profile! D.E.I.D.A.R.A, Stands for: Dangerously, Explosive, Idiot, Doing, Amazing, Reckless, Art T.O.B.I, stands for: Totally, Obnixious, But, Innocent. :3 If you have ever forgotten your name when introducing yourself, copy this into your profile. If several inanimate objects hate you, copy this into your profile. If you have ever started to laugh like a mad-man in the middle of class, copy this into your profile Just scroll down to the end, but Go for it! SCROLL DOWN! STOP! Congratulations! Your wish will Now follow this carefully...it If you repost this within the next 5 min. This is scary! The phone will ring right after you repost! How to Tell if You're a Writer -If you talk to yourself. I DO HALF THE STUFF ON THAT LIST!!! Mostly talking to myself 5 Truths of Life. 1. You cannot touch all of your teeth with your tongue 2. All idiots, after reading the first truth, try it 3. The first truth is a lie 4. You're smiling right now because you know you fell for it... (Idiot!) 5. You still have a stupid smile lingering on your face Now, if you fell for it (I KNOW you did), copy & paste this into your profile. Oh well… I already knew I was an Idiot .! You say BABY PINK 101 things to do at WalMart - If you have done at least 10 of these then you my friend, are super awesome!! I have done numbers: 7 12 16 - I've tried it except i put a black bra on my head and ran around the cloths section singing the batman theme song 24 - long hair is a good excuse 27 35 48 49 55 - I'm stalkerlicous 100 1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations. 2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store. 3. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day. 4. Start playing football; see how many people you can get to join in. 5. Run up to an employee (preferably a male) while squeezing your legs together and practically yell at him "I need some tampons!!" 6. Try on bras in the sewing/fabric department. 7. Try on bras over top of your clothes. 8. Make a trail of orange juice on the ground, leading to the restrooms. 9. While walking around the store, sing in your loudest voice possible "Sex and candy". 10. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I think we've got a Code Red in Housewares," and see what happens. 11. Tune all the radios to a polka station, turn them all off and turn up all the volumes to the max. 12. Play with the automatic doors. 13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen you in so long!..." etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment. 14. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, "Who BUYS this shit, anyway?" 15. Repeat #14 in the jewelry department. 16. Try putting different pairs of women's panties on your head and walk around the store casually. 17. Leave small sacrifices or gifts in the hands of the mannequins. 18. Play soccer with a group of friends, using the entire store as your playing field. 19. As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, "Wow. Magic!" 20. Put M&M's on layaway. 21. Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas. 22. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath. 23. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners. 24. Nonchalantly "test" the brushes and combs in Cosmetics. 25. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying, "...I'm Batman. Come, Robin--to the Batcave!" 26. TP as much of the store as possible. 27. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles. 28. Play with the calculators so that they all spell "hell" upside down. 29. When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?" 30. When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, "Red Rover!" 31. Look right into the security camera, and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose. 32. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men. 33. Take bets on the battle described above. 34. Set up another battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. G.I. Janes. (Red lipstick might give an interesting effect!!) 35. While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as possible. 36. While no one's watching quickly switch the men's and women's signs on the doors of the rest room. 37. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from "Mission: Impossible." 38. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags. 40. Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags. 41. Fill your cart with boxes of condoms, and watch everyone's jaws drop when you attempt to buy them. 42. Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store. 43. Two words: "Marco Polo." 44. Leave Cheerios in Lawn and Garden, pillows in the pet food aisle,etc. 45. "Re-alphabetize" the CD's in Electronics. 46. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna" look with various funnels. 47. Hide in the clothing racks and when people browse through, say things like "the fat man walks alone," and scare them into believing that the clothes are talking to them 48. While walking around alone, pretend someone is with you and get into a very serious conversation. Exp: The person is breaking up with you and you begin crying "How could you do this to me? I thought you loved me! I knew there was another girl, but I thought I had won. You kissed ME darling." Then act as though you are being beaten and fall onto the ground screaming and having convulsions. 49. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "No, no! It's those voices again!" 50. Go to an empty checkout stand and try to check people out. 51. Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don't get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it. 52. Get a stuffed animal and go to the front of the store and begin stroking it lovingly, saying "Good girl, good Bessie." 53. Go over to the shoe department and try on every pair of shoes, not putiing one pair back. Take the paper from the boxes and throw it in various aisles. 54. When someone steps away from their cart to look at something,quickly make off with it without saying a word. 55. Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the department. 56. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon. 57. Test the fishing rods and see what you can "catch" from the other aisles. 58. In the makeup department, spray yourself with every perfume there is, then walk up to a boy who is with another girl and start flirting with him in that annoying, ditsy way. "hi!! (giggle) What's your sign?(giggle)." When the boy shows no interest, start hitting on the girl the exact same way. "hi!! (giggle) What's your sign? (giggle)." 59. Hold indoor shopping cart races. 60. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit. 61. When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially thin narrow aisles. 62. Relax in the patio furniture until you get kicked out. 63. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap. 64. Pay off layaways fifty cents at a time. 65. Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?" 66. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., "Do you have any Shnerples here?" 67. Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you're taking it for a "test drive." 68. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters. 69. Get boxes of Condoms and randomly put them in peoples carts when they don't realize it. 70. Get an empty book, and say it's a guest book. Get people to sign. 71. Play a game of indoor freeze tag 72. Drive around the entrances screaming out the window "the British are coming" 73. Have a team race with your friends- one person sits in the cart, the other pushes 74. Go to the checkout and buy a bar of candy. Repeat, going to the same cash register, until the clerk notices 75. Fill your cart up as much as possible, and then try to use the express lane 76. Use a bullhorn and occasionally say that there is free candy in aisle X (aisle X being the condom aisle) 77. Run into a pyramid of cans, heroically saying "I'm gonna save us from that bomb!" 78. Use a conveyer belt as a treadmill and lose some weight 79. Grab heavy but not too heavy objects, and see who can throw them the most aisles over. 80. When people aren't looking, put tampons in their carts if they are a guy, or if they are a gal, put in a jock strap. 81. Randomly direct people to the deodorant section 82. Tell someone that you will sue for false advertising, since they do not sell walls. 83. Take your boyfriend or girlfriend to the food section and have an expensive dinner. 84. Try to push your cart through a checkout without paying. When the clerk tries to stop you, kick in his balls (dont try it on a chick, it wont work), run, but leave the cart. See what happens. 85. If people arent looking at their cart, steal it. 86. Go to the gun section, saying "Can I buy a gun? I'm tired of that stupid smily face!" 87. Buy expensive stuff, go home and use wite-out and a pen to change the price to something much lower, and the total much higher, then return and demand a refund. 88. See how much stuff you can break before you get caught 89. Take a leak in the dressing rooms. 90. Repeadeately say "The clowns are not eating me." 91. Use fake checks, but sign them using your neighbors name. 92. Rearrange items as you see fit. 93. Take a full set of guy's clothes and a full set of gal's clothes, then leave them lying somewhere. 94. Put pokemon stuff in a cart that is full of stuff like KoRn and Limp Bizkit CDs. 95. Grab condoms and stick them in everyone's face (only the opposite sex). 96. Do #95 but with the same sex (not recomended). 97. Grab stickers that say "radioactive" and put them randomly on food items. 98. Follow someone until they notice. 99. Pull out pins, like that guy form the 7 Up commercial. 100. Throw Skittles at people and scream "TASTE THE RAINBOW!" 101. Loiter. When asked to leave, tell them you live here.' FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr/Mrs. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Try to half-ass comfort you when you feel down. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Always keep your stuff they borrowed in perfect condition. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink because they think it's polite. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Know a few things about you. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will knock on your front door. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Ask you what you number is. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Are for awhile. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Have to be reminded not to tell. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will take your drink away when they think you’ve had enough. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will offer to pay when you have a drink. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Don't let friends drive drunk. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will apologize when you forget lunch money and say that they don't have any left. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will smile and say "Don't worry about me" when they forget their lunch money, even if you didn't offer to pay. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will automatically tell you you're beautiful when you ask if something makes you look fat. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Would tell you not to get a face-lift because you already look perfect. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Tell you your zits aren't noticeable. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Laugh with you. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Laugh at all your jokes. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Congratulate you when you get good grades. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Encourage you not to skip school. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will talk shit to the person who talks shit about you. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Say they are too busy to listen to your problems, but when it comes to them they expect you to have all the time in the world. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Say sorry when you want to talk to them at odd hours of the night, or even just hang out at odd hours. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will glare at the guy who dumps you and say "Forget him. You're too good for him." FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Crush on your older brother whom you absolutely despise. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will ignore this. ~There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile. ~Most people are only alive because it's illegal to shoot them. ~Be optimistic. :) The people you hate will eventually die. ~What happens if you get scared half to death... Twice? ~Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one. ~Life is like a Pack of Gum... I've yet to figure out why. ~Can I take your picture? I collect photos of Natural Disasters. ~He who laughs last thinks slowest. ~It takes 47 muscles to frown, and 17 to smile, but it doesn't take any to just sit there with a dumb look on your face. ~How important does a person have to be before a person is considered assassinated instead of murdered? ~We're all pretty bizarre, some of us are just better at showing it. ~If you can't beat them... Arrange to have them beaten... ~Yo mumma is so fat, even Naruto don't Believe it! ~When I said "I'd hit that!" ... I meant with my car... ~When people don't laugh at our jokes, I don't think of it as a "You had to be there" type of thing... It's more of a "You have to be Mentally Retarded like us" type of thing... -Your chances of getting struck by lightning go up if you stand under a tree, shake your fist at the sky and yell "Storms Suck" -You say psycho like it's a bad thing! -Worst excuse for not turning in homework: I couldn't find anyone to copy it from. -When life gives you lemons, make apple juice, then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it -When life gives you lemons, throw them back and demand chocolate -When life gives you lemons, throw them at the mean people and hope it gets them in the eyes -If at first you don't succeed, burn all the evidence that you tried -The only reason I talk to myself is because I'm the only one whose answer I accept -Last night I was looking up at the stars when suddenly I wondered, "Dude, where the heck's my ceiling?" -Cheese will rule do not deny the truth -Everyday I think people can't get any stupider. Everyday I am proven horribly wrong -All sane people who worked here quit -Everything is funny as long as it's happening to some one else -One by one penguins steal my sanity, but since when have I been sane -I've been given sugar. Please use this time to prepare for the end of the world -What you call stupidity, I call selective understanding -It is better to dwell in the wilderness than with contentious and angry women -A vase is basically a flower torture device; you rip it from its home, put it in a small container and watch it die slowly -I will temporarily rule the world, forever -One bright day in the middle of the night two dead boys got up to fight. Back to back they faced each other, drew their swords and shot each other. Then a deaf policeman heard the noise and drew his gun and stabbed the boys. If you don't believe this lie is true, ask the blind man, he saw it too. And if you don't believe the blind, ask the deaf he heard it fine. -If you don't like the way I drive stay off the sidewalk! -A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle. - (this is Sarah) When life gives you lemons, giggle and think of yaoi. Naruto Name Meanings: Sasuke- Parrot (BAHAHAHA! That explains so much!) Itachi- Weasel (So that explains the eye line thingys) Sakura- Cherry Blossom (Not really creative.) Kisame- Demon Shark (Really?) Sasori- Scorpion (I wonder why?) Kiba- Fang (What gave it away?) Naruto- Ramen toppings with a pink whirlpool design in the middle (Yeah, I'll have Naruto for lunch.) Deidara- Mud (SON OF A !!) or Day Flaw (...) or Bat (That actually makes sense) Kakuzu- Painting made to Life (Makes sense if you think 'bout it!) Hidan- Bandit gang (No duh, Sherlock.) Pein- Priss (if you fell for that then your a noob!) Pain Hinata- Sunflower (Awww, how sweet.) Shikamaru- Deer (I don't like deers anymore! Poor Hidan...) Tobi- Good Boy (Not true but he is!) Zabuza- Cuts Once (Interesting... Is it because of the huge sword or the shark teeth?) Haku- Someone who has a meaning in someones life. (Oh the iorny!) Neji- Screw (So when i'm saying 'Neji You' i'm really sayig 'Screw You'!) LIA IS NOW DONE!!!! :3 The rest is my friends junk Ways to Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity 1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down. 2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice. 3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with that. 4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In." 5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso . 6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write For Smuggling Diamonds" 7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy." 8. Don't use any punctuation 9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk. 10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face. 11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go." 12. Sing Along At The Opera. 13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme? 14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play tropical Sounds All Day. 15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood. 16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom. 17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won!, I Won!" 18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives,They're Loose!!" 19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner."Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go." I don't have kids guys, it was just really funny and i had to put it on here. 92 percent American teens would die if Abecrombie and Fitch told them it uncool to breathe. Copy this into your profile if you would be in the 8 percent laughing their asses off at the others. FEMALE COMEBACKS Man: Where have you been all my life? Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Man: Is this seat empty? Man: Your place or mine? Man: So, what do you do for a living? Man: Hey baby, what's your sign? Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning? Man: Your body is like a temple. Man: I would go to the end of the world for you. Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy. Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together Man: Your eyes they're amazing. Man: What's your number, beautiful? If: Then: H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E but and, B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T AND, look how far ass kissing will take you. A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that while HARDWORK and KNOWLEDGE will get you close, and ATTITUDE will get you there, its really the BULLSHIT and the ASSKISSING that will put you over the top. 15 Things I Hate About Everyone: 1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.. I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is? 2 People who are willing to get off their butt to search the entire room for the T.V.. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually. 3 When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it? 4When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? I'mma kick their asses! 5 When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No Loser, I paid 12 bucks to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor. 6 People who ask "Can I ask you a question?". Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine? 7. When something is 'new and improved!' Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new. 8 When people say "life is short". What the heck? Life is the longest darn thing anyone ever does! What can you do that's longer? 9When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?" If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbass? 10. People who say things like 'My eyes aren't what they used to be'. So what did they used to be? Ears?, Wellington boots? 11. When you're eating something and someone asks 'Is that nice?' No it's really revolting - I always eat stuff I hate. 12. People who announce they are going to the toilet. Thanks that's an image I really didn't need. 13.McDonalds staff who pretend they don't understand you if you don't insert the 'Mc' before the item you are ordering... It has to be a 14.When a cop pulls you over and then asks if you know how fast you were going? You should know asshole, you fucking pulled me over. 15.When people talk to you using txt language. "FYI, IDK, but like in my IMHO IDC, 'cause -" "Hey, get this, STFU. It stands for Shut The Fuck Up" Annoying things to do in an elevator 1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, 2) STAND silent and motionless in the 3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt 4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake 5) MEOW occasionally. 6) STARE At another passenger for a 7) SAY -DING at each floor. 8) SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And 9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone 10) STARE, grinning at another passenger 11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look 12) TRY to make personal calls on the 13) DRAW a little square on the floor 14) WHEN there's only one other person 15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they 16) ASK if you can push the button for 17) HOLD the doors open and say you're 18) DROP a pen and wail until someone 19) BRING a camera and take pictures of 20) PRETEND you're a flight attendant 21) SWAT at flies that don't exist. 22) CALL out "Group hug" then enforce it. This is Sarah BITCHES!!! :) Ways to get kicked out of McDonald's 1. Walk in and demand that they give you a Whopper 2. Walk up to the counter and stand there for 5 minutes going “I’ll have the…no…ummm….you know what I’ll have the…no never mind…huh…” 3. Ask for exactly 53 fries with your order and if they say no scream, “YOU ARE A RACIST!” 4. Go in the drive through and say “Hello, may I take your order?” and act like you are taking the cashier’s order 5. Walk through the drive-thru, yet pretend that you are in a car. 6. Stand at the toy display case with your face pressed against it and say “OoooooOooo! I want that!” over and over 7. When they give you your order yell, “WHERE’S MY TOY!” 8. Sing your order in the drive-thru 9. Drive in circles through the drivbe through, knocking on the window each time saying “Hi.” 10. Run in through the door, into the center of the room and scream, “WHERE’S RONALD!!!!!!” 11. Order a burger and eat it in front of the cashier, re-enacting the Bubble Bass episode of Spongebob where he “forgets” to add pickles to the Krabby Patty. 12. When you get to the cashier say, “Yes I’ll have a number…” and make up numbers that aren’t on the menu. 13. Ask for Pepsi and if they ask if Coke is okay yell, “NO! COKE IS NOT OKAY! WOULD YOU LIKE ME TO PAY YOU IN SAND DOLLARS? HUH??????????????” 14. Walk up to the register and poke the cashier’s face and say, ”Teehee!” every time you poke it. 15. Walk in with Burger King meal and casually eat it. 16. Bring in a huge tub and fill it with soda from the fountain and if anybody approaches you, make animal noises. 17. Walk into the lady’s/men’s room (guys go into the lady’s room and girls go into the guy’s room” and if anybody asks you why you are in there say, “I got all the plastic surgery and hormones, I just need to get these/this replaced…” and point to your crotch. 18. Jump from table to table 19. Walk in with stocking on your face, a name tag with a fake first and last name on it, and a pillow case and yell, “GIVE ME ALL YOUR MONEY!” in a different language. If the cashier understands the language than call them a “beautiful angel and a butterfly” in the language. Then, pull out a filled squirt gun, say “You had your chance!” and squirt it at everybody 20. Go outside to the window where they give you food wearing a glove that looks like a demon’s hand or something else scary. Hide under it and every time that somebody reaches out to get their food grab their arm and make demonic noises 21. Hide in bushes near the drive thru and hop on the backs of cars while they drive by. Then, every time that they drive by a window, wave with a creepy smile. 22. Walk into the place wearing an insane costume and act like there is nothing wrong. Order your food and every time that somebody stares/ looks at you, yell “What?” 23. Eat your food and suddenly, cough. Then, act like you are having a seizure, clutch your chest/throat, and make horrific noises. If anybody asks if something is wrong say, ”Yes…I…just found out…that…*cough*…Michael Jackson’s dead..” than gag really loud, start to cry and run to the bathroom, preferably the bathroom of the opposite sex. 24. Walk into the bathroom. Wait five minutes, then, rub a chocolate bar all over the back of your pants and rub it in so that it looks like it sank through your underwear, onto your pants. Then, walk out into the middle of the room with some of it all over your hands and yell, “Excuse me! There is no more toilet paper!’ 25. Sit next to a random person and eat their food. 26. Go into the bathroom, into a stall and start making really load noises and grunts yelling, “OH YAH! OOOOOOOOH YAH!” loud enough so that people outside can hear. 27. Enter the restaurant like an inchworm, inching on the floor all the way to the register, than order from the floor. 28. Walk into the center of the room, pretend to dial a number on your phone, then have a really loud conversation on it for half an hour. If an employee says anything to you say “Shh! I’m on the phone!” 29. Walk up to the cashier looking ragged and pathetic. Use dark eye shadow to create dark bags under your eyes. Sniffle then say, ”Ronald..he..he did bad things to me!” then start crying hysterically. 30. Walk up to the cashier, point at them and start laughing like a maniac. 31. Go into the restaurant with a friend. Enter from different sides of the restaurant wearing cowboy outfits. Taunt each other inside of Southern accents then have a stand-off 32. Walk in dressed up like Hannah Montana and start singing, “The Best of Both Worlds” and at the end yell, “NOW GIVE ME SOME FREAKING CHICKEN NUGGETS!” 33. Enter wearing a speedo or a bikini and do the “Jerk” or some other strange dance. 34. Run in panting and yell, “THE ZOMBIES! THEY’RE COMING!” Then scream and proceed to run around the restaurant in circles. 35. Dress up like a waiter and go to each table, asking for orders, then bring them to the cashiers. Bring friends to be waiter’s as well. 36. Go inside and sit down for a long time period, finally get up in a rage and yell " WHERE THE HELL IS THE WAITER!!!!!!!!!!!!" 37. Pull up to the speaker box and yell "How the hell do you fit in that box!" 38. Go through the drive through and have one of your friends get in the trunk then when you pull up to get your food have them start banging on the trunk and yell "LET ME OUTTA HERE" a couple of times. 11 ways to get kicked out of Walmart 1. Glare menacingly at anyone who comes within 40 ft of you. Then hiss like a snake and act like you're going to bite them 2. Take a friend with you and a younger child and start arguing over who gets custody then have the child run away and out of the store and yell CILLY COME BACK!!! 3. Go to the checkout and buy a bar of candy. Repeat, going to the same cash register, until the clerk notices 4. Light a match under a sprinkler 5. Steal guns and ammo and shoot all the TV's you can find. whoever blows up most wins 6. Yell curse words at people 7. Scream, "GET OUT OF MY YARD!" to everyone who walks by you. 8. Bring a slip n' slide blast some Music and bring some random people to it and kick their back so they slide accross the slip n' slide and scream "PARTY IN THE HIZ HOUSE!!!!!!!" 9. Point at an old man and yell, "LOOK EVERYONE! IT'S BRITNEY SPEARS!" 10. Buy a fake but expensive looking vase. (ex. a cheap glass pot.) Fill it with some ash and soot. Then take it to an employee, bump into him and drop it so it shatters. Then keep screaming at him that it was your mother and you will sue him for every thing he owns, and tell him he has to pick it up then and there or he will be cursed for 10 years. 11. Put a squirt gun in a stuffed elmo's hand and scream, "Everybody down!! Elmo's got a gun!" Well that's some ways. I got them from here: There's a lot of funny stuff in there You're gonna recognize these from some movies If I ever happen to become an Evil Overlord: 1.My Legions of Terror will have helmets with clear plexiglass visors, not face-concealing ones. 2.My ventilation ducts will be too small to crawl through. 3.My noble half-brother whose throne I usurped will be killed, not kept anonymously imprisoned in a forgotten cell of my dungeon. 4.Shooting is not too good for my enemies. 5.The artifact which is the source of my power will not be kept on the Mountain of Despair beyond the River of Fire guarded by the Dragons of Eternity. It will be in my safe-deposit box. The same applies to the object which is my one weakness. 6.I will not gloat over my enemies' predicament before killing them. 7.When the rebel leader challenges me to fight one-on-one and asks, ``Or are you afraid without your armies to back you up?'' My reply will be, ``No, just sensible.'' 8.When I've captured my adversary and he says, ``Look, before you kill me, will you at least tell me what this is all about?'' I'll say, ``No.'' and shoot him. 9.After I kidnap the beautiful princess, we will be married immediately in a quiet civil ceremony, not a lavish spectacle in three weeks' time during which the final phase of my plan will be carried out. 10.I will not include a self-destruct mechanism unless absolutely necessary. If it is necessary, it will not be a large red button labelled ``Danger: Do Not Push''. The big red button marked ``Do Not Push'' will instead trigger a spray of bullets on anyone stupid enough to disregard it. Similarly, the ON/OFF switch will not clearly be labelled as such. 11.I will not order my trusted lieutenant to kill the infant who is destined to overthrow me -- I'll do it myself. 12.I will not interrogate my enemies in the inner sanctum -- a small hotel well outside my borders will work just as well. 13.I will be secure in my superiority. Therefore, I will feel no need to prove it by leaving clues in the form of riddles or leaving my weaker enemies alive to show they pose no threat. 14.I will not waste time making my enemy's death look like an accident -- I'm not accountable to anyone and my other enemies wouldn't believe it. 15.I will make it clear that I do know the meaning of the word ``mercy''; I simply choose not show them any. 16.One of my advisors will be an average five-year-old child. Any flaws in my plan that he is able to spot will be corrected before implementation. 17.All slain enemies will be cremated, or at least have several rounds of ammunition emptied into them, not left for dead at the bottom of the cliff. The announcement of their deaths, as well as any accompanying celebration, will be deferred until after the aforementioned disposal. 18.My undercover agents will not have tattoos identifying them as members of my organization, nor will they be required to wear military boots or adhere to any other dress codes. 19.The hero is not entitled to a last kiss, a last cigarette, or any other form of last request. 20.I will never employ any device with a digital countdown. If I find that such a device is absolutely unavoidable, I will set it to activate when the counter reaches 117 and the hero is just putting his plan into operation. 21.I will design all doomsday machines myself. If I must hire a mad scientist to assist me, I will make sure that he is sufficiently twisted to never regret his evil ways and seek to undo the damage he's caused. 22.I will never utter the sentence ``But before I kill you, there's just one thing I want to know.'' 23.When I employ people as advisors, I will occasionally listen to their advice. 24.I will not have a son. Although his laughably under-planned attempt to usurp power would easily fail, it would provide a fatal distraction at a crucial point in time. 25.I will not have a daughter. She would be as beautiful as she was evil, but one look at the hero's rugged countenance and she'd betray her own father. 26.Despite its proven stress-relieving effect, I will not indulge in maniacal laughter. When so occupied, it's too easy to miss unexpected developments that a more attentive individual could adjust to accordingly. 27.I will hire a talented fashion designer to create original uniforms for my Legions of Terror, as opposed to some cheap knock-offs that make them look like Nazi stormtroopers, Roman footsoldiers, or savage Mongol hordes. All were eventually defeated and I want my troops to have a more positive mind-set. 28.No matter how tempted I am with the prospect of unlimited power, I will not consume any energy field bigger than my head. 29.I will keep a special cache of low-tech weapons and train my troops in their use. That way -- even if the heroes manage to neutralize my power generator and/or render the standard-issue energy weapons useless -- my troops will not be overrun by a handful of savages armed with spears and rocks. 30.I will maintain a realistic assessment of my strengths and weaknesses. Even though this takes some of the fun out of the job, at least I will never utter the line ``No, this cannot be! I AM INVINCIBLE!!!'' (After that, death is usually instantaneous.) 31.No matter how well it would perform, I will never construct any sort of machinery which is completely indestructible except for one small and virtually inaccessible vulnerable spot. 32.No matter how attractive certain members of the rebellion are, there is probably someone just as attractive who is not desperate to kill me. Therefore, I will think twice before ordering a prisoner sent to my bedchamber. 33.I will never build only one of anything important. All important systems will have reduntant control panels and power supplies. For the same reason I will always carry at least two fully loaded weapons at all times. 34.If my supreme command center comes under attack, I will immediately flee to safety in my prepared escape pod and direct the defenses from there. I will not wait until the troops break into my inner sanctum to attempt this. 35.My pet monster will be kept in a secure cage from which it cannot escape and into which I could not accidentally stumble. 36.Even though I don't really care because I plan on living forever, I will hire engineers who are able to build me a fortress sturdy enough that, if I am slain, it won't tumble to the ground for no good structural reason. 37.I will dress in bright and cheery colors, and so throw my enemies into confusion. 38.All bumbling conjurers, clumsy squires, no-talent bards, and cowardly thieves in the land will be pre-emptively put to death. My foes will surely give up and abandon their quest if they have no source of comic relief. 39.All naive, busty tavern wenches in my realm will be replaced with surly, world-weary waitresses who will provide no unexpected reinforcement and/or romantic subplot for the hero or his sidekick. 40.Any and all magic and/or technology that can miraculously resurrect a secondary character who has given up his/her life through self sacrifice will be outlawed and destroyed. 41.I will not fly into a rage and kill a messenger who brings me bad news just to illustrate how evil I really am. Good messengers are hard to come by. 42.I will see to it that plucky young lads/lasses in strange clothes and with the accent of an outlander shall REGULARLY climb some monument in the main square of my capital and denounce me, claim to know the secret of my power, rally the masses to rebellion, etc. That way, the citizens will be jaded in case the real thing ever comes along. 43.I won't require high-ranking female members of my organization to wear a stainless-steel bustier. Morale is better with a more casual dress-code. Similarly, outfits made entirely from black leather will be reserved for formal occasions. 44.I will not employ devious schemes that involve the hero's party getting into my inner sanctum before the trap is sprung. 45.I will not turn into a snake. It never helps. 46.I will not grow a goatee. In the old days they made you look diabolic. Now they just make you look like a disaffected member of Generation X. 47.I will not imprison members of the same party in the same cell block, let alone the same cell. If they are important prisoners, I will keep the only key to the cell door on my person instead of handing out copies to every bottom-rung guard in the prison. 48.If my trusted lieutenant tells me my Legions of Terror are losing a battle, I will believe him. After all, he's my trusted lieutenant. 49.If an enemy I have just killed has a younger sibling or offspring anywhere, I will find them and have them killed immediately, instead of waiting for them to grow up harboring feelings of vengeance towards me in my old age. 50.If I absolutely must ride into battle, I will certainly not ride at the forefront of my Legions of Terror, nor will I seek out my opposite number among his army. 51.I will be neither chivalrous nor sporting. If I have an unstoppable superweapon, I will use it as early and as often as possible instead of keeping it in reserve. 52.Once my power is secure, I will destroy all those pesky time-travel devices. 53.I will offer oracles the choice of working exclusively for me or being executed. 54.When I capture the hero, I will make sure I also get his dog, monkey, ferret, or whatever sickeningly cute little animal capable of untying ropes and filching keys happens to follow him around. 55.I will maintain a healthy amount of skepticism when I capture the beautiful rebel and she claims she is attracted to my power and good looks and will gladly betray her companions if I just let her in on my plans. 56.I will only employ bounty hunters who work for money. Those who work for the pleasure of the hunt tend to do dumb things like even the odds to give the other guy a sporting chance. 57.I will not rely entirely upon ``totally reliable'' spells that can be neutralized by relatively inconspicuous talismen. 58.I will make sure I have a clear understanding of who is responsible for what in my organization. For example, if my general screws up I will not draw my weapon, point it at him, say ``And here is the price for failure,'' then suddenly turn and kill some random underling. 59.If an advisor says to me ``My liege, he is but one man. What can one man possibly do?'', I will reply ``This.'' and kill the advisor. 60.If I learn that a callow youth has begun a quest to destroy me, I will slay him while he is still a callow youth instead of waiting for him to mature. 61.I will treat any beast which I control through magic or technology with respect and kindness. Thus if the control is ever broken, it will not immediately come after me for revenge. 62.If I learn the whereabouts of the one artifact which can destroy me, I will not send all my troops out to seize it. Instead I will send them out to seize something else and quietly put a Want-Ad in the local paper. 63.My main computers will have their own special operating system that will be completely incompatible with standard IBM and Macintosh powerbooks. 64.I will make the main entrance to my fortress standard-sized. While elaborate 60-foot high double-doors definitely impress the masses, they are hard to close quickly in an emergency. 65.If one of my dungeon guards begins expressing concern over the conditions in the beautiful princess' cell, I will immediately transfer him to a less people-oriented position. 66.I will hire a team of board-certified architects and surveyors to examine my castle and inform me of any secret passages and abandoned tunnels that I might not know about. 67.If the beautiful princess that I capture says ``I'll never marry you! Never, do you hear me, NEVER!!!'', I will say ``Oh well'' and kill her. 68.I will not strike a bargain with a demonic being then attempt to double-cross it simply because I feel like being contrary. 69.The deformed mutants and odd-ball psychotics will have their place in my Legions of Terror. However before I send them out on important covert missions that require tact and subtlety, I will first see if there is anyone else equally qualified who would attract less attention. 70.My Legions of Terror will be trained in basic marksmanship. Any who cannot learn to hit a man-sized target at 10 meters will be used for target practice. 71.Before employing any captured artifacts or machinery, I will carefully read the owner's manual. 72.If it becomes necessary to escape, I will never stop to pose dramatically and toss off a one-liner. 73.I will never build a sentient computer smarter than I am. 74.My five-year-old child advisor will also be asked to decipher any code I am thinking of using. If he breaks the code in under 30 seconds, it will not be used. Note: this also applies to passwords. 75.If my advisors ask ``Why are you risking everything on such a mad scheme?'', I will not proceed until I have a response that satisfies them. 76.I will never accept a challenge from the hero. 77.I will design fortress hallways with no alcoves or protruding structural supports which intruders could use for cover in a firefight. 78.I will not engage an enemy single-handedly until all my soldiers are dead. 79.Bulk trash will be disposed of in incinerators, not compactors. And they will be kept hot, with none of that nonsense about flames going through accessible tunnels at predictable intervals. 80.I will see a competent psychiatrist and get cured of all extremely unusual phobias and bizarre compulsive habits which could prove to be a disadvantage. 81.If I must have computer systems with publically available terminals, the maps they display of my complex will have a room clearly marked as the Main Control Room. That room will be the Execution Chamber. The actual main control room will be marked as Sewage Overflow Containment. 82.My security keypad will actually be a fingerprint scanner. Anyone who watches someone press a sequence of buttons or dusts the pad for fingerprints then subsequently tries to enter by repeating that sequence will trigger the alarm system. 83.If I capture the hero's starship, I will keep it in the landing bay with the ramp down, only a few token guards on duty and a ton of explosives set to go off as soon as it clears the blast-range. 84.No matter how many shorts we have in the system, my guards will be instructed to treat every surveillance camera malfunction as a full-scale emergency. 85.I will spare someone who saved my life sometime in the past. This is only reasonable as it encourages others to do so. However, the offer is good one time only. If they want me to spare them again, they'd better save my life again. 86.All midwives will be banned from the realm. All babies will be delivered at state-approved hospitals. Orphans will be placed in foster-homes, not abandoned in the woods to be raised by creatures of the wild. 87.When my guards split up to search for intruders, they will always travel in groups of at least two. They will be trained so that if one of them disappears mysteriously while on patrol, the other will immediately initiate an alert and call for backup, instead of quizzically peering around a corner. 88.If I decide to test a lieutenant's loyalty and see if he/she should be made a trusted lieutenant, I will have a crack squad of marksmen standing by in case the answer is no. 89.If all the heroes are standing together around a strange device and begin to taunt me, I will pull out a conventional weapon instead of using my unstoppable superweapon on them. 90.I will not agree to let the heroes go free if they win a rigged contest, even though my advisors assure me it is impossible for them to win. 91.When I create a multimedia presentation of my plan designed so that my five-year-old advisor can easily understand the details, I will not label the disk ``Project Overlord'' and leave it lying on top of my desk. 92.I will instruct my Legions of Terror to attack the hero en masse, instead of standing around waiting while members break off and attack one or two at a time. 93.If the hero runs up to my roof, I will not run up after him and struggle with him in an attempt to push him over the edge. I will also not engage him at the edge of a cliff. (In the middle of a rope-bridge over a river of molten lava is not even worth considering.) 94.If I have a fit of temporary insanity and decide to give the hero the chance to reject a job as my trusted lieutentant, I will retain enough sanity to wait until my current trusted lieutenant is out of earshot before making the offer. 95.I will not tell my Legions of Terror ``And he must be taken alive!'' The command will be ``And try to take him alive if it is reasonably practical.'' 96.If my doomsday device happens to come with a reverse switch, as soon as it has been employed it will be melted down and made into limited-edition commemorative coins. 97.If my weakest troops fail to eliminate a hero, I will send out my best troops instead of wasting time with progressively stronger ones as he gets closer and closer to my fortress. 98.If I am fighting with the hero atop a moving platform, have disarmed him, and am about to finish him off and he glances behind me and drops flat, I too will drop flat instead of quizzically turning around to find out what he saw. 99.I will not shoot at any of my enemies if they are standing in front of the crucial support beam to a heavy, dangerous, unbalanced structure. 100.If I'm eating dinner with the hero, put poison in his goblet, then have to leave the table for any reason, I will order new drinks for both of us instead of trying to decide whether or not to switch with him. 101.I will not have captives of one sex guarded by members of the opposite sex. 102.I will not use any plan in which the final step is horribly complicated, e.g. ``Align the 12 Stones of Power on the sacred altar then activate the medallion at the moment of total eclipse.'' Instead it will be more along the lines of ``Push the button.'' 103.I will make sure that my doomsday device is up to code and properly grounded. 104.My vats of hazardous chemicals will be covered when not in use. Also, I will not construct walkways above them. 105.If a group of henchmen fail miserably at a task, I will not berate them for incompetence then send the same group out to try the task again. 106.After I captures the hero's superweapon, I will not immediately disband my legions and relax my guard because I believe whoever holds the weapon is unstoppable. After all, the hero held the weapon and I took it from him. 107.I will not design my Main Control Room so that every workstation is facing away from the door. 108.I will not ignore the messenger that stumbles in exhausted and obviously agitated until my personal grooming or current entertainment is finished. It might actually be important. 109.If I ever talk to the hero on the phone, I will not taunt him. Instead I will say this his dogged perseverance has given me new insight on the futility of my evil ways and that if he leaves me alone for a few months of quiet contemplation I will likely return to the path of righteousness. (Heroes are incredibly gullible in this regard.) 110.If I decide to hold a double execution of the hero and an underling who failed or betrayed me, I will see to it that the hero is scheduled to go first. 111.When arresting prisoners, my guards will not allow them to stop and grab a useless trinket of purely sentimental value. 112.My dungeon will have its own qualified medical staff complete with bodyguards. That way if a prisoner becomes sick and his cellmate tells the guard it's an emergency, the guard will fetch a trauma team instead of opening up the cell for a look. 113.My door mechanisms will be designed so that blasting the control panel on the outside seals the door and blasting the control panel on the inside opens the door, not vice versa. 114.My dungeon cells will not be furnished with objects that contain reflective surfaces or anything that can be unravelled. 115. to keep my subjects permanently locked in a mindless trance, I will provide each of them with free unlimited Internet access. I will not order my trusted lieutenant to kill the infant who is destined to overthrow me -- I'll do it myself.I will not waste time making my enemy's death look like an accident -- I'm not accountable to anyone and my other enemies wouldn't believe it.I will make it clear that I doknow the meaning of the word "mercy"; I simply choose not show them any.My undercover agents will not have tattoos identifying them as members of my organization, nor will they be required to wear military boots or adhere to any other dress codes.I will design all doomsday machines myself. If I must hire a mad scientist to assist me, I will make sure that he is sufficiently twisted to never regret his evil ways and seek to undo the damage he's caused.If my supreme command center comes under attack, I will immediately flee to safety in my prepared escape pod and direct the defenses from there. I will not wait until the troops break into my inner sanctum to attempt this.Even though I don't really care because I plan on living forever, I will hire engineers who are able to build me a fortress sturdy enough that, if I am slain, it won't tumble to the ground for no good structural reason.Any and all magic and/or technology that can miraculously resurrect a secondary character who has given up his/her life through self sacrifice will be outlawed and destroyed.I will see to it that plucky young lads/lasses in strange clothes and with the accent of an outlander shall REGULARLY climb some monument in the main square of my capital and denounce me, claim to know the secret of my power, rally the masses to rebellion, etc. That way, the citizens will be jaded in case the real thing ever comes along.I will not employ devious schemes that involve the hero's party getting into my inner sanctum before the trap is sprung.I will offer oracles the choice of working exclusively for me or being executed.I will not rely entirely upon "totally reliable" spells that can be neutralized by relatively inconspicuous talismans.I will make the main entrance to my fortress standard-sized. While elaborate 60-foot high double-doors definitely impress the masses, they are hard to close quickly in an emergency.I will never accept a challenge from the hero.I will not engage an enemy single-handedly until all my soldiers are dead.If I capture the hero's starship, I will keep it in the landing bay with the ramp down, only a few token guards on duty and a ton of explosives set to go off as soon as it clears the blast-range.No matter how much I want revenge, I will never order an underling "Leave him. He's mine!"If I have equipment which performs an important function, it will not be activated by a lever that someone could trigger by accidentally falling on when fatally wounded.I will not attempt to kill the hero by placing a venomous creature in his room. It will just wind up accidentally killing one of my clumsy henchmen instead.Since nothing is more irritating than a hero defeating you with basic math skills, all of my personal weapons will be modified to fire one more shot than the standard issue.If I come into possession of an artifact which can only be used by the pure of heart, I will not attempt to use it regardless.The gun turrets on my fortress will not rotate enough so that they may direct fire inward or at each other.If I decide to hold a contest of skill open to the general public, contestants will be required to remove their hooded cloaks and shave their beards before entering.Prior to kidnapping an older male scientist and forcing him to work for me, I will investigate his offspring and make sure that he has neither a beautiful but naive daughter who is willing to risk anything to get him back, nor an estranged son who works in the same field but had a falling-out with his father many years ago.Should I actually decide to kill the hero in an elaborate escape-proof deathtrap room (water filling up, sand pouring down, walls converging, etc.) I will not leave him alone five-to-ten minutes prior to "imminent" death, but will instead (finding a vantage point or monitoring camera) stick around and enjoy watching my adversary's demise.Rather than having only one secret escape pod, which the hero can easily spot and follow, I'll simultaneously launch a few dozen decoys to throw him off track.Prison guards will have their own cantina featuring a wide variety of tasty treats that will deliver snacks to the guards while on duty. The guards will also be informed that accepting food or drink from any other source will result in execution.I will not employ robots as agents of destruction if there is any possible way that they can be re-programmed or if their battery packs are externally mounted and easily removable.Despite the delicious irony, I will not force two heroes to fight each other in the arena.All members of my Legions of Terror will have professionally tailored uniforms. If the hero knocks a soldier unconscious and steals the uniform, the poor fit will give him away.I will never place the key to a cell just out of a prisoner's reach.Before appointing someone as my trusted lieutenant, I will conduct a thorough background investigation and security clearance.If I find my beautiful consort with access to my fortress has been associating with the hero, I'll have her executed. It's regrettable, but new consorts are easier to get than new fortresses and maybe the next one will pay attention at the orientation meeting.If I am escaping in a large truck and the hero is pursuing me in a small Italian sports car, I will not wait for the hero to pull up along side of me and try to force him off the road as he attempts to climb aboard. Instead I will slam on the brakes when he's directly behind me. (A rudimentary knowledge of physics can prove quite useful.)My doomsday machine will have a highly-advanced technological device called a capacitor in case someone inconveniently pulls the plug at the last second. (If I have access to REALLY advanced technology, I will include a back-up device known as a battery.)If I build a bomb, I will simply remember which wire to cut if it has to be deactivated and make every wire red.Before spending available funds on giant gargoyles, gothic arches, or other cosmetically intimidating pieces of architecture, I will see if there are any valid military expenditures that could use the extra budget.The passageways to and within my domain will be well-lit with fluorescent lighting. Regrettably, the spooky atmosphere will be lost, but my security patrols will be more effective.If I'm sitting in my camp, hear a twig snap, start to investigate, then encounter a small woodland creature, I will send out some scouts anyway just to be on the safe side. (If they disappear into the foliage, I will not send out another patrol; I will break out the napalm.)I will instruct my guards when checking a cell that appears empty to look for the chamber pot. If the chamber pot is still there, then the prisoner has escaped and they may enter and search for clues. If the chamber pot is not there, then either the prisoner is perched above the lintel waiting to strike them with it or else he decided to take it as a souvenir (in which case he is obviously deeply disturbed and poses no threat). Either way, there's no point in entering.As an alternative to not having children, I will have lots of children. My sons will be too busy jockeying for position to ever be a real threat, and the daughters will all sabotage each other's attempts to win the hero.If I have children and subsequently grandchildren, I will keep my three-year-old granddaughter near me at all times. When the hero enters to kill me, I will ask him to first explain to her why it is necessary to kill her beloved grandpa. When the hero launches into an explanation of morality way over her head, that will be her cue to pull the lever and send him into the pit of crocodiles. After all, small children like crocodiles almost as much as Evil Overlords and it's important to spend quality time with the grandkids.If one of my daughters actually manages to win the hero and openly defies me, I will congratulate her on her choice, declare a national holiday to celebrate the wedding, and proclaim the hero my heir. This will probably be enough to break up the relationship. If not, at least I am assured that no hero will attack my Legions of Terror when they are holding a parade in his honor.I will order my guards to stand in a line when they shoot at the hero so he cannot duck and have them accidentally shoot each other. Also, I will order some to aim above, below, and to the sides so he cannot jump out of the way.My dungeon cell decor will not feature exposed pipes. While they add to the gloomy atmosphere, they are good conductors of vibrations and a lot of prisoners know Morse code.If my surveillance reports any un-manned or seemingly innocent ships found where they are not supposed to be, they will be immediately vaporized instead of brought in for salvage.I will classify my lieutenants in three categories: untrusted, trusted, and completely trusted. Promotion to the third category will be awarded posthumously.Before ridiculing my enemies for wasting time on a device to stop me that couldn't possibly work, I will first acquire a copy of the schematics and make sure that in fact it couldn't possibly work.Ropes supporting various fixtures will not be tied next to open windows or staircases, and chandeliers will be hung way at the top of the ceiling.I will provide funding and research to develop tactical and strategic weapons covering a full range of needs so my choices are not limited to "hand to hand combat with swords" and "blow up the planet".I will not set myself up as a god. That perilous position is reserved for my trusted lieutenant.I will instruct my fashion designer that when it comes to accessorizing, second-chance body armor goes well with every outfit.My Legions of Terror will be an equal-opportunity employer. Conversely, when it is prophesied that no man can defeat me, I will keep in mind the increasing number of non-traditional gender roles.I will instruct my Legions of Terror in proper search techniques. In particular, if they are searching for escapees and someone shouts, "Quick! They went that way!", they must first ascertain the identity of this helpful informant before dashing off in hot pursuit.If I know of any heroes in the land, I will not under any circumstance kill their mentors, teachers, and/or best friends.If I have the hero and his party trapped, I will not wait until my Superweapon charges to finish them off if more conventional means are available.Whenever plans are drawn up that include a time-table, I'll post-date the completion 3 days after it's actually scheduled to occur and not worry too much if they get stolen.I will exchange the labels on my folder of top-secret plans and my folder of family recipes. Imagine the hero's surprise when he decodes the stolen plans and finds instructions for Grandma's Potato Salad.If I burst into rebel headquarters and find it deserted except for an odd, blinking device, I will not walk up and investigate; I'll run like hell.Before being accepted into my Legions of Terror, potential recruits will have to pass peripheral vision and hearing tests, and be able to recognize the sound of a pebble thrown to distract them.I will occasionally vary my daily routine and not live my life in a rut. For example, I will not always take a swig of wine or ring a giant gong before finishing off my enemy.If I steal something very important to the hero, I will not put it on public display.When planning an expedition, I will choose a route for my forces that does not go through thick, leafy terrain conveniently located near the rebel camp.I will hire one hopelessly stupid and incompetent lieutenant, but make sure that he is full of misinformation when I send him to capture the hero.As an equal-opportunity employer, I will have several hearing-impaired body-guards. That way if I wish to speak confidentially with someone, I'll just turn my back so the guards can't read my lips instead of sending all of them out of the room.If the rebels manage to trick me, I will make a note of what they did so that I do not keep falling for the same trick over and over again.If I am recruiting to find someone to run my computer systems, and my choice is between the brilliant programmer who's head of the world's largest international technology conglomerate and an obnoxious 15-year-old dork who's trying to impress his dream girl, I'll take the brat and let the hero get stuck with the genius.I will plan in advance what to do with each of my enemies if they are captured. That way, I will never have to order someone to be tied up while I decide his fate.If I have massive computer systems, I will take at least as many precautions as a small business and include things such as virus-scans and firewalls.I will be an equal-opportunity despot and make sure that terror and oppression is distributed fairly, not just against one particular group that will form the core of a rebellion.I will not locate a base in a volcano, cave, or any other location where it would be ridiculously easy to bypass security by rapelling down from above.I will allow guards to operate under a flexible work schedule. That way if one is feeling sleepy, he can call for a replacement, punch out, take a nap, and come back refreshed and alert to finish out his shift.Although it would provide amusement, I will not confess to the hero's rival that I was the one who committed the heinous act for which he blames the hero.If I am dangling over a precipice and the hero reaches his hand down to me, I will not attempt to pull him down with me. I will allow him to rescue me, thank him properly, then return to the safety of my fortress and order his execution.I will have my fortress exorcized regularly. Although ghosts in the dungeon provide an appropriate atmosphere, they tend to provide valuable information once placated.I will add indelible dye to the moat. It won't stop anyone from swimming across, but even dim-witted guards should be able to figure out when someone has entered in this fashion.If a scientist with a beautiful and unmarried daughter refuses to work for me, I will not hold her hostage. Instead, I will offer to pay for her future wedding and her children's college tuition.If I have the hero cornered and am about to finish him off and he says "Look out behind you!!" I will not laugh and say "You don't expect me to fall for that old trick, do you?" Instead I will take a step to the side and half turn. That way I can still keep my weapon trained on the hero, I can scan the area behind me, and if anything was heading for me it will now be heading for him.I will not outsource core functions.If I ever build a device to transfer the hero's energy into me, I will make sure it cannot operate in reverse.I will decree that all hay be shipped in tightly-packed bales. Any wagonload of loose hay attempting to pass through a checkpoint will be set on fire.I will not hold any sort of public celebration within my castle walls. Any event open to members of the public will be held down the road in the festival pavilion.Before using any device which transfers energy directly into my body, I will install a surge suppressor.I will hire a drama coach. The hero will think it must be a case of mistaken identity when confronted by my Minnesota accent (if everyone sounds American) or my Cornwall accent (if everyone sounds British).If I capture an enemy known for escaping via ingenious and fantastic little gadgets, I will order a full cavity search and confiscate all personal items before throwing him in my dungeon.I will not devise any scheme in which Part A consists of tricking the hero into unwittingly helping me and Part B consists of laughing at him then leaving him to his own devices.I will not hold lavish banquets in the middle of a famine. The good PR among the guests doesn't make up for the bad PR among the masses.I will funnel some of my ill-gotten gains into urban renewal projects. Although slums add a quaint and picturesque quality to any city, they too often contain unexpected allies for heroes.I will never tell the hero "Yes I was the one who did it, but you'll never be able to prove it to that incompetent old fool." Chances are, that incompetant old fool is standing behind the curtain.If my mad scientist/wizard tells me he has almost perfected my Superweapon but it still needs more testing, I will wait for him to complete the tests. No one ever conquered the world using a beta version.I will not appoint a relative to my staff of advisors. Not only is nepotism the cause of most breakdowns in policy, but it also causes trouble with the EEOC.If I appoint someone as my consort, I will not subsequently inform her that she is being replaced by a younger, more attractive woman.If I am using the hero's girlfriend as a hostage and am holding her at the point of imminent death when confronting the hero, I will focus on her and not him. He won't try anything with his true love held hostage. On the other hand, the fact that she has been weak, slow-witted, naive and generally useless up to this point has no bearing on her actions at the moment of dramatic climax.I will make several ludicrously erroneous maps to secret passages in my fortress and hire travellers to entrust them to aged hermits.I will not use hostages as bait in a trap. Unless you're going to use them for negotiation or as human shields, there's no point in taking them.I will hire an expert marksman to stand by the entrance to my fortress. His job will be to shoot anyone who rides up to challenge me.I will explain to my Legions of Terror that guns are ranged weapons and swords are not. Anyone who attempts to throw a sword at the hero or club him with a gun will be summarily executed.I will remember that any vulnerabilities I have are to be revealed strictly on a need-to-know basis. I will also remember that no one needs to know.I will not make alliances with those more powerful than myself. Such a person would only double-cross me in my moment of glory. I will make alliances with those less powerful than myself. I will then double-cross them in their moment of glory.During times of peace, my Legions of Terror will not be permitted to lie around drinking mead and eating roast boar. Instead they will be required to obey my dietician and my aerobics instructor.All giant serpents acting as guardians in underground lakes will be fitted with sports goggles to prevent eye injuries.All crones with the ability to prophesy will be given free facelifts, permanents, manicures, and Donna Karan wardrobes. That should pretty well destroy their credibility.I will not employ an evil wizard if he has a sleazy mustache.I will hire an entire squad of blind guards. Not only is this in keeping with my status as an equal opportunity employer, but it will come in handy when the hero becomes invisible or douses my only light source.All repair work will be done by an in-house maintenance staff. Any alleged "repairmen" who show up at the fortress will be escorted to the dungeon.When my Legions of Terror park their vehicle to do reconnaissance on foot, they will be instructed to employ The Club.Employees will have conjugal visit trailers which they may use provided they call in a replacement and sign out on the timesheet. Given this, anyone caught making out in a closet while leaving their station unmonitored will be shot.Members of my Legion of Terror will attend seminars on Sensitivity Training. It's good public relations for them to be kind and courteous to the general population when not actively engaged in sowing chaos and destruction.I will not, under any circumstances, marry a woman I know to be a faithless, conniving, back-stabbing witch simply because I am absolutely desperate to perpetuate my family line. Of course, we can still date.All guest-quarters will be bugged and monitored so that I can keep track of what the visitors I have for some reason allowed to roam about my fortress are actually plotting.If my chief engineer displeases me, he will be shot, not imprisoned in the dungeon or beyond the traps he helped design.I will not send out batalions composed wholly of robots or skeletons against heroes who have qualms about killing living beings.I will not wear long, heavy cloaks. While they certainly make a bold fashion statement, they have an annoying tendency to get caught in doors or tripped over during an escape.If a malignant being demands a sacrificial victim have a particular quality, I will check to make sure said victim has this quality immediately before the sacrifice and not rely on earlier results. (Especially if the quality is virginity and the victim is the hero's girlfriend.)If I ever MUST put a digital timer on my doomsday device, I will buy one free from quantum mechanical anomalies. So many brands on the market keep perfectly good time while you're looking at them, but whenever you turn away for a couple minutes then turn back, you find that the countdown has progressed by only a few seconds.If my Legions of Terror are defeated in a battle, I will quietly withdraw and regroup instead of launching a haphazard mission to assassinate the hero.If I'm wearing the key to the hero's shackles around my neck and his former girlfriend now volunteers to become my mistress and we are all alone in my bedchamber on my bed and she offers me a goblet of wine, I will politely decline the offer.I will not pick up a glowing ancient artifact and shout "It's power is now mine!!!" Instead I will grab some tongs, transfer it to a hazardous materials container, and transport it back to my lab for study.I will be selective in the hiring of assassins. Anyone who attempt to strike down the hero the first instant his back is turned will not even be considered for the job.Whatever my one vulnerability is, I will fake a different one. For example, ordering all mirrors removed from the palace, screaming and flinching whenever someone accidentally holds up a mirror, etc. In the climax when the hero whips out a mirror and thrusts it at my face, my reaction will be "Hmm...I think I need a shave."My force-field generators will be located insidethe shield they generate.I reserve the right to execute any henchmen who appear to be a little too intelligent, powerful, or devious. However if I do so, I will not at some subsequent point shout "Why am I surrounded by these incompetent fools?!"I will install a fire extinguisher in every room -- three, if the room contains vital equipment or volatile chemicals.I will build machines which simply fail when overloaded, rather than wipe out all nearby henchmen in an explosion or worse yet set off a chain reaction. I will do this by using devices known as "surge protectors".I will explain to my guards that most people have their eyes in the front of their heads and thus while searching for someone it makes little sense to draw a weapon and slowly back down the hallway.All giant serpents acting as guardians in underground lakes will be fitted with sports goggles to prevent eye injuries.All crones with the ability to prophesy will be given free facelifts, permanents, manicures, and Donna Karan wardrobes. That should pretty well destroy their credibility.I will not employ an evil wizard if he has a sleazy mustache.I will hire an entire squad of blind guards. Not only is this in keeping with my status as an equal opportunity employer, but it will come in handy when the hero becomes invisible or douses my only light source.All repair work will be done by an in-house maintenance staff. Any alleged "repairmen" who show up at the fortress will be escorted to the dungeon.When my Legions of Terror park their vehicle to do reconnaissance on foot, they will be instructed to employ The Club.Employees will have conjugal visit trailers which they may use provided they call in a replacement and sign out on the timesheet. Given this, anyone caught making out in a closet while leaving their station unmonitored will be shot.Members of my Legion of Terror will attend seminars on Sensitivity Training. It's good public relations for them to be kind and courteous to the general population when not actively engaged in sowing chaos and destruction.I will not, under any circumstances, marry a woman I know to be a faithless, conniving, back-stabbing witch simply because I am absolutely desperate to perpetuate my family line. Of course, we can still date.All guest-quarters will be bugged and monitored so that I can keep track of what the visitors I have for some reason allowed to roam about my fortress are actually plotting.If my chief engineer displeases me, he will be shot, not imprisoned in the dungeon or beyond the traps he helped design.I will not send out battalions composed wholly of robots or skeletons against heroes who have qualms about killing living beings.I will not wear long, heavy cloaks. While they certainly make a bold fashion statement, they have an annoying tendency to get caught in doors or tripped over during an escape.If a malignant being demands a sacrificial victim have a particular quality, I will check to make sure said victim has this quality immediately before the sacrifice and not rely on earlier results. (Especially if the quality is virginity and the victim is the hero's girlfriend.)If I ever MUST put a digital timer on my doomsday device, I will buy one free from quantum mechanical anomalies. So many brands on the market keep perfectly good time while you're looking at them, but whenever you turn away for a couple minutes then turn back, you find that the countdown has progressed by only a few seconds.If my Legions of Terror are defeated in a battle, I will quietly withdraw and regroup instead of launching a haphazard mission to assassinate the hero.If I'm wearing the key to the hero's shackles around my neck and his former girlfriend now volunteers to become my mistress and we are all alone in my bedchamber on my bed and she offers me a goblet of wine, I will politely decline the offer.I will not pick up a glowing ancient artifact and shout "Its power is now mine!!!" Instead I will grab some tongs, transfer it to a hazardous materials container, and transport it back to my lab for study.I will be selective in the hiring of assassins. Anyone who attempts to strike down the hero the first instant his back is turned will not even be considered for the job.Whatever my one vulnerability is, I will fake a different one. For example, ordering all mirrors removed from the palace, screaming and flinching whenever someone accidentally holds up a mirror, etc. In the climax when the hero whips out a mirror and thrusts it at my face, my reaction will be "Hmm...I think I need a shave."My force-field generators will be located insidethe shield they generate.I reserve the right to execute any henchmen who appear to be a little too intelligent, powerful, or devious. However if I do so, I will not at some subsequent point shout "Why am I surrounded by these incompetent fools?!"I will install a fire extinguisher in every room -- three, if the room contains vital equipment or volatile chemicals.I will build machines which simply fail when overloaded, rather than wipe out all nearby henchmen in an explosion or worse yet set off a chain reaction. I will do this by using devices known as "surge protectors".I will explain to my guards that most people have their eyes in the front of their heads and thus while searching for someone it makes little sense to draw a weapon and slowly back down the hallway.I will have a staff of competent detectives handy. If I learn that someone in a certain village is plotting against me, I will have them find out who rather than wipe out the entire village in a preemptive strike.I will never bait a trap with genuine bait.If the hero claims he wishes to confess in public or to me personally, I will remind him that a notarized deposition will serve just as well.If I have several diabolical schemes to destroy the hero, I will set all of them in motion at once rather than wait for them to fail and launch them successively.I will not procrastinate regarding any ritual granting immortality.Mythical guardians will be instructed to ask visitors name, purpose of visit, and whether they have an appointment instead of ancient riddles. This Evil Overlord List is © 1996-1997 by Peter Anspach. If you enjoy it, feel free to pass it along or post it anywhere, provided that (1) it is not altered in any way, and (2) this copyright notice is attached. For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD the ones you are.) I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth. I rarely show my EMOTIONS, so I MUST hate the world and everything in it. I DON’T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems YOUR GUY SIDE: (X)You love hoodies. TOTAL: 12 YOUR GIRL SIDE: (X)You wear lip gloss/chapstick.(strawberry) TOTAL:17 Yeah that figures. I'm a little more girly. I. Xemnas II. Xigbar III. Xaldin IV. Vexen V. Lexaeus VI. Zexion VII. Saïx VIII. Axel IX. Demyx X. Luxord XI. Marluxia XII. Larxene XIII. Roxas And the winners are...Demyx,Xemnas, and Xigbar. Demyx just so happens to be my favorite! :)Along with Saix. 1. Your real name: Sarah 2. Your Nobody name (Take all the letters of your first name, mix them around and put an "x" where you think it should go): hmmm...Raxhas? 3. Your Gangsta name (the first three letters of your name pluss "izzle"): Sarizzle XD 4. Your Detective name (fav. color and fav. animal): Red Wolf. Not bad. 5. Your Soap Opera name (your middle name and the street you live on): Kaitlyn Marion. Nice ring to it. 6. Your Star Wars name (first three letters of your last name, first two letters of your first): Rossa. I lilke it. 7. Your Super Hero name (2nd fav color, fav drink): Black Juice. I'm your worst nightmare :) 8. Your Witness Protection name (middle names of your parents): Anne. Dad doen't have a middle name. 9. Your Goth Name (Black plus the name of one of your pets): Black KT. That's what I get for naming her when I was four. I was born on the day of Roxas+Vexen, I'm Saix + Zexion years old. You could also say that I'm Demyx + Vexen years old. (ages in the story are fake, but the personalities are very real.) I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian. Re-post this if you believe homophobia is wrong. Please do your part to end it At age 8, your dad buys you an ice cream. You thanked him by dripping When you were 9 years old, he paid for piano lessons. You thanked him When you were 10 years old he drove you all day, from soccer to When you were 11 years old, he took you and your friends to When you were 12 years old, he warned you not to watch When you were 13, he suggested a haircut that was in fashion. When you were 14, he paid for a month away at summer camp. When you were 15, he came home from work, looking for a hug. When you were 16, he taught you how to drive his car. You When you were 17, he was expecting an important call. You thanked him When you were 18, he cried at your high school graduation. You thanked When you were 19, he paid for your college tuition, drove you to campus When you were 25, he helped to pay for your wedding, and he told you When you were 50, he fell ill and needed you to take care of him . You And then, one day, he quietly died. And everything you never did came Month one Mommy Month Two Mommy Month Three You know what Mommy Month Four Mommy Month Five You went to the doctor today. Month Six I can hear that doctor again. Month Seven Mommy Every Abortion Is Just . . . One more heart that was stopped. If you're against abortion, re-post this and if you almost cryed post this in your profile If you believe in Jesus Christ put this in your profile. Don't just ignore this, because in the Bible it says 'If you deny Me, I will deny you in front of My Father in the gates of Heaven.' Try Not To Cry Mommy...Johnny brought a gun to school, He told his friends that it was cool, And when he pulled the trigger back, It shot with a great, huge crack. Mommy, I was a good girl, I did what I was told, I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold! When I went to school that day, I never said good-bye. I'm sorry that I had to go, But Mommy, please don't cry. When Johnny shot the gun, he hit me and another, And all because Johnny, got the gun from his brother. Mommy, please tell Daddy; That I love him very much, And please tell Zack; my boyfriend; That it wasn't just a crush. And tell my little sister; That she is the only one now, And tell my dear sweet grandmother; I'll be waiting for her now And tell my wonderful friends; That they always were the best Mommy, I'm not the first, I'm no better than the rest Mommy, tell my teachers; I won't show up for class, And never to forget this, And please don't let this pass Mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one, though. deserves this. But mommy, it's not fair, I left without a kiss. But mommy, it's not fair, I left without a kiss. I think I even saw one doctor, trying not to cry. Mommy, I'm slowly dying, with a bullet in my chest, But Mommy please remember, I'm in heaven with the rest When I heard that great, big crack, I ran as fast as I could please listen to me if you would, I wanted to go to college, I wanted to try things that were new I guess I'm not going with Daddy, On that trip to the new zoo I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid, I wanted to be an actress, I really wanted to live. But Mommy I must go now, The time is getting late, Mommy, tell my Zack, I'm sorry I to cancel the date. I love you Mommy, I always have, I know you know its true And Mommy all I need to say is, "Mommy, I love you" In Memory of The Columbine & Virginia Tech Please if you would, If you pass this on, Maybe people will cry, Just keep this in your heart, For the people who didn't get to say "Good-bye". Now you have 2 choices, 1) Pass this on, and show people you care, repost as Stop Child Abuse! My name is Chris I am three My eyes are swollen I can not see I must be stupid I must be bad, What else could have made My daddy so mad? I wish i were better I wish i weren't ugly Then maybe my mommy Would still hug me I can't do a wrong I can't speak at all Or else i'm locked up All day long When i wake i'm all alone The house is dark My folks aren't home When mommy does come I'll try and be nice So maybe i'll just get One whipping tonight I just heard a car My daddy is back From Charlie's bar I hear him curse My name is called I press myself Against the wall I try to hide From his evil eyes I'm so afraid now I'm starting to cry He finds me weeping Calls me ugly words He says it's all my fault That he suffers at work He slaps and hits me And yells at me more I finally get free And run to the door He's already locked it And i start to bawl He takes and throws me Against the hard wall I fall to the floor With my bones nearly broken And my daddy continues With more bad words spoken "I'm sorry!" I scream But it's too late now His face is twisted Into an unimaginable shape The hurt and the pain Again and again Oh please god, have mercy! Oh please let it end! And he finally stops And heads for the door While i lay motionless Sprawled on the floor My name is Chris I am three Tonight my daddy Murdered me Her dad was a drunk She always talked to it Until her parents A bruise on her leg But she grabs her bear She sits in the corner Such a bad life Then one night Then her mom suddenly She thrust the blade The mom walked out Police showed up One officer slowly It must have been bad random producer guy from DisneyXD is working on Naruto Shippuden until... BOOM! Jiraiya, Deidara, and Hidan crash into the room. "What is the meaning of this, un?!" Deidara yelled out. "You took out a precious moment of my art!!" "As much as I appreciate you getting rid of my nickname, you're going to take out the women!" Jiraiya shouted. "You took out the swearing... and the blood," Hidan growled as he walked up to him. "What kind of f_ing ninja show doesn't have blood in it?!" Hidan brought his scythe up to the guy's neck. "It was for the fans! I made it appropriate so even six year olds could watch!" the guy screamed as he... uh... gave himself a reason to look for new pants. "Who gives a crap about the freakin' six-year-olds?! The freakin' fourteen-year-olds are gonna kill you for taking out the good parts!" There was another BOOM! Three ninja fans busted down the wall. Two jounin-level boys, and a chuunin-level girl. A fourth girl jumped in behind them, flashing her kunai. A fifth girl came after her with three katanas one in the mouth and one in each hand giving a death glare at the producer. "GET HIM!!" Put this on your profile if you noticed what Disney took out of Naruto Shippuden, and you're mad about it. And add yourself to the fans invasion! And now an ode to yaoi: If yaoi were vodka And I were a duck I'd swim to the bottom And drink my way up But Yaoi ain't vodka And I ain't a duck So give me some yaoi And shut the fuck up Gay marriage: 2) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall. 3) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract. 4) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal. 5) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Briteny Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed. 6) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children. 7) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children. 8) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America. 9) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children. 10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans... -- THE NARUTO SURVEY!! NARUTARDS UNITE!! 1) Who is your favorite character(s)? Kiba,Kankuro,Temari,Hinata,Deidara 2) Which is your favorite pairing(s)? NaruHina,ShikaTema 3) Are you a Naruto yaoi or hentai fan? Yaoi! 4) Ever cosplayed Naruto character(s)? Nope.I've only cosplayed once. 5) List your collection of Naruto junk and merchandise. 3 books, 2 poster books, 2 plushies,and that's it. 6) Have you ever felt you were destined to be with a Naruto character? ...Fine. I confess. I'm a Kiba lover. 7) NaruHina or KibaHina? See numbers 2 and 6. 8) SasuSaku or SasuNaru? SasuNaru.Sasuke's an asshole. Sakura can do soooooo much better. 9) Which team is your favorite? Team 8. Or does the Akatsuki count? 10) Do you support the Obito theory? (Tobi = Obito) Nooooooooooooooooo. Not even before I knew who Tobi's real identity. 11) Do you support the 'Yondaime is Naruto's father' theory? Yes. Of course now it's been proven. You would think someone would have pointed that out. 12) Your favorite Akatsuki member? Dei-Dei-Kun!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 13) Are you Pro-Sasuke or Anti-Sasuke? Pro. yesterday, I was watching the Newest shippuden and he was shirtless. I squealed a little bit. Then I slapped myself. 14) Have you seen all of the Naruto episodes so far (including Shippuden and fillers)? Yes. 15) Have you read all the chapters so far? Yup. 16) Do you believe Naruto has ADD? Ummmm...maybe just a little. 17) Sub or dub? In sub, I only like Kiba's and Sasuke's voices. They're the only ones that I can always tell apart from others. I like dub. I like the voices. But Naruto's still annoys me a bit. 18) Pro-Sakura or Anti-Sakura? Naruto= Anti. Shippuden= Pro. 19) Tobi = Annoying or funny? Honestly? It changes all the time. 20) Do you even know who Tobi is? Yeah. Anyone caught up with the manga, or even just the anime does. 21) Gai = Sexy beast or Ugly nerd? Ugly beast seems about right. But He's pretty funny. 22) Which character would be the best crossdresser? ...I don't want to picture them like that, so I'll say Orochimaru. 23) Rock Lee = Weird or awesome? Both. That's entirely possible. 24) Which character would be the best OOC? Any Uchiha. 25) Do you like Naruto fan fictions?...Really? Of course I do! 26) Do you write Naruto fan fictions? Yes. 27) Do you like lemons? Yaoi only. 28) Do your parents know about the Naruto characters? My mom doesn't. Dad knows about Kiba but that's about it. 29) Have you ever watched the Naruto Abridged series? No. But Lia's trying to get me to. 30) Have you ever seen the Naruto Ultimate Fan Flashes? Nope. 31) Have you ever got someone else hooked on Naruto?No. 32) Have you ever been drawing Naruto in school and someone recognized it?Nope.Because I suck at drawing. 33) Have you ever been in class drawing Naruto and your teacher came up to you and say 'WTF is this?'I don't do anime in class. 34) Has Naruto affected your life and grades? It takes up a lot of the time I should have been studying for exams. 35) Are you broke thanks to Naruto? Nope. 36) Do you want to read Icha Icha Paradise? Out of PURE curiosity about what's inside. 37) Do you support the 'Yondaime is the Akatsuki Leader' theory? No. 38) Do you draw Naruto fan art? See Number 32 39) Is Sasuke still sexy in the second stage of the curse seal? If I say yes, is that bad? Because I think he looks really good. 40) Do you have a Naruto OC? Ummmm a few. 41) Do you look/act like a Naruto character? If so, who? I can't say. Someone else would have to answer 42) Looking back at some of your answers, do you think Naruto has taken over your life? I don't know about the answers, but I think it has. Number your twelve favorite Naruto characters ((in no order)) and answer the questions! 1 Kiba 2 Temari 3 Hinata 4 Deidara 5 Kankuro 6 Sasori 7 Sasuke 8 Konan 9 Neji 10 Shikamaru 11 Chouji 12 Ino 1.) Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fic? (Sasori/Choji) Nope.I don't even think there are any *searches*Nope there's not 2.) Do you think Four is hot? How hot?(Deidara) YES!!!! He's My third favorite. 1-10? 9.9. I like them blonde. 3.) What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant? (Ino got Konan preggers) A really bad fanfiction. I do however, support this couple. 4.) Do you recall any fics about Nine? (Neji) You're kidding right? Desiditarium or however you spell it is really good and there are plenty more. 5.) Would Two and Six make a good couple? (Temari and Sasori) In an AU story? Yes. I like their personalities. But of course they're enemies in canon. 6.) Five/Nine or Five/Ten? (Kankuro/Neji or Kankuro/Shikamaru) I think Kankshika is already a pairing. If it's not I like them. 7.) What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve having sex? (Sasuke,Ino/Temari) "If it means you'll stop chasing me...I have no problem with this. *Walks out and shuts the door* 8.) Make up a summary of a Three/Ten fic. (ShikaHina.) god...um... okay "He always thought those eyes were pointed at one of his best friends. He didn't realize he was wrong." okay... that was bad. 9.) Is there such thing as One/Eight fluff? (Kiba and Konan) No. I've NEVER found one. 10.) Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve Hurt/Comfort fic.(Sasuke and Ino) hmmmmm fuck. I don't know Not just a fan. A friend. Kinda long? 11.) What kind of plot would you use if you wanted Four to deflower One? (Deidara and Kiba) I'm gonna pretend we're talking about destroying someone. Um,well maybe like what would happen if Kiba was with Kankuro when Sasori and Dei took Gaara, Kiba could go after Dei. and then BIG FIGHT! deflowering=done. I don't write fight fics. 12.) Does anyone of your friends read Three het? (Hinata) Lia read a threesome. Once, mind you. I don't think she likes it. 13.) Does anyone of your friends read, write or draw Eleven? (Chouji) I LOVE Chouji. But the question here is my friends. And no, they don't. 14.) Would anyone of your friends write Two/Four/Five? (Tema/Dei/Kank) No. But I would 15.) What might Ten scream at the moment of great passion? (Shika) Other than that moment with Asuma, I don't think Shika ever yells. 16.) If you wrote a song fic about Eight, which song would you use? (Konan) Imaginary by Evanescence or Anthem of the Angels by Breaking Benjamin 17.) If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warning be? (Kiba/Saso/Ino) warning yaoi. Slight Crack. 18.) What would be a good pick-up line for Ten to use on Two? (Shikatema) WOOOO! I love this couple! But she would have to ask him. 19.) How might Eleven describe a relationship between Two and Eight? (Chouji , Ino/Konan) Creepy. 20.) How emo is Seven? (Sasuke) God this question fits him. 1-10 scale. 8.5 "(1) and (7) are in a happy relationship until (7) runs off with (4). (1), brokenhearted, has a hot one-night stand with (11) and a brief unhappy affair with (12), then follows the wise advice of (5) and finds true love with (3).” "Kiba and Sasuke are in a happy relationship until Sasuke runs off with Deidara. Kiba, brokenhearted, has a hot one-night stand with Chouji and a brief unhappy affair with Ino, then follows the wise advice of Kankuro and finds true love with Hinata." I like DeiSasu and SasuKiba. But that's the only thing I like about this. That, and Kiba had an unhappy affair with Ino. Put your Ipod on shuffle and write down the first song that plays! No Skipping! Skipping makes it no fun! :) See how crazy yours gets. LIFE STORY: Opening Credits: Boom Boom Pow by The Black Eyed Peas. Which is a good song to begin with I guess. Waking Up: Good Morning Beautiful by Steve Holy. The title fits, but the song is really more a love song. First Day At School: Lithium by Evanescence. This is such a depressing song...it doesn't really fit. Falling In Love: Before He Cheats by Carrie Underwood. This song's about cheating, so I guess in a way it does kinda work. Fight Song: This is War by 30 Seconds to Mars. Oh, this FITS! Breaking Up: Cheatin' by Sara Evans. Yup, this fits pretty damn well. Prom: She Wolf by Shakira. Yeah, this fits okay. I LOVE this song though. Life's OK: You Can Let Go by Crystal Shawanda. This is Such an awesome and touching song. And, in its own way, it fits. It's about a girl singing to her dad that she's gonna be okay. He can let go of her. Go listen to it. It's really nice. Mental Breakdown: 30 Minutes by t.A.T.u. I think this song fits a mental breakdown. Especially in the music video, where Yulia blows up a carousel and kills herself after she sees Lena and a man making out on it. Driving: Alyssa Lies by Jason Michael Carroll. Yes, because I don't know about you, but when I'm driving, I like to listen to depressing songs that make me cry and wonder what's wrong with humans. Again, if you can stand country, go listen to it. Flashback: HELD by Natalie Grant. Another good country song about God protecting us. She sings how God promised us He'd be there in our darkest hour to protect us. Getting Back Together: Let it Rock by Kevin Rudolf. Yeah this fits, if you get back together at a party.Nothing wrong with that. Wedding: Two is Better than One by Boys Like Girls. :) This is such a slow sweet song! It totally fits! Birth of Child: I Saw God Today by George Strait. That's exactly what the song's about anyway, so it fits. Final Battle: Grenade by Bruno Mars. No, It doesn't fit in my opinon, but I love it so much anyway. Death Scene: I'll Take You Back by Jeremy Camp. If I died with someone next to me that I cared about, this would fit. Funeral Song: Who I Am by Jessica Andrews. This song is about being proud of who you are. Does it fit???? I'm don't really know :/ End Credits: Teenage Dream by Katy Perry. Yeah that really fits! AQUARIUS - The Slut PISCES - The Addict LEO - The Cool One CANCER - The Smart One. ARIES- The Irresistible One SAGITTARIUS-The One that Waits TAURUS- The Aggressive One LIBRA - The Partner for Life CAPRICORN - The Cute One SCORPIO - The Gorgeous One VIRGO- The Promiscuous One GEMINI - The Liar 1.Put your iTunes on shuffle (Or Mp3 Player, or whatever you use) 1. Every Day...in my pants (:D) 2. Gives You Hell...in my pants (:B) 3. I Wanna Make You Close Your Eyes...in my pants (...) 4. If I Had You..in my pants (;D) 5. Freak the Freak Out...in my pants(That makes Nick seem dirty) 6. Crush...in my pants (...) 7. Irreplaceable...in my pants (...these are going downhill) 8. Big Girls Don't Cry...in my pants (Yes. They Do.) 9. You and Me...in my pants (That's a little better) 10. Like We Never Loved at All...in my pants (:D now we're going up again.) 11. 7 Things...in my pants ( I don't even like that song anymore.) 12. Red Light...in my pants (Green Light in mine!) Pein/Pain - Nagato [Pein/Pain - Nagato Score: 2 ] Konan [Konan Score: 2 ] Itachi Uchiha [Itachi Uchiha Score: 4 ] Kisame Hoshigaki [X] - Underwater in the ocean is a beautiful scenery. [X ] - I'm the tallest of my friends who are the same gender. [Kisame Hoshigaki Score: 6 ] Sasori [ ] - I'm the smallest of my friends. [Sasori Score: 4] Deidara [Deidara Score: 3] Kakuzu [ ] - I hate Hidan. [Kakuzu Score: 1] Hidan [Hidan Score: 4 ] Zetsu [Zetsu Score: 5] Tobi [Tobi Score: 2] Orochimaru [Orochimaru Score: 5] SO the winner is everyone's favorite shark...HELL YEAH!!!!! "Is there a limit to how much you can love somebody? I support Egoist :) EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY WINNERS!!!!!!!!(In my opinon) John Lennon vs. Bill O'Reiliy- Bill Fave J.L. line- "You can't buy me love, but I'll kick your ass for free." Fave B.R. line- "Stop your presses Lennon! You call me MISTER Bill O'Reiliy!" Darth Vader vs. Adolf Hitler- Adolf Fave D.V. Line- "So many dudes been with your mom, who even knows if I'm your father?" Fave A.H. Line- "I am Adolf Hitler! Commander of the Third Reich!" Abe Lincoln vs. Chuck Norris-Chuck Fave A.L. Line- "I never told a lie and I won't start now, you're a horse with a limp and I'll put you down!" Fave C.N. Line- "This isn't Gettysburg punk, I suggest retreating!" Sarah Palin vs Lady Gaga-Gaga Fave S.P. Line- "I seen those oufits you've been wearing, that takes BIG balls!" Fave L.G. Line- "I sound more intelligent then you when I fart!" Kim Jong-Il vs Hulk Hogan and Macho Man Randy Savage-Kim Fave K.J.I. Line- "North Korea Bitch! Lemme give you a tour! By the way, your wife says my dick is bigger than your's!" Fave H.H. Line- "Brother I'll leg drop your ass back to Beijing!" Fave M.M. Line- "But when midgets step up,I stomp midget asses!" Justin Bieber vs. Ludwig van Beethoven- Ludwig Fave J.B. Line- "I've got Kim Kardashian in my bed backstage, when's the last time your music got anybody laid?" Fave L.V. Line- "I would smack you, but in Germany we don't hit little girls!" Albert Einstein vs. Stephen Hawking- Stephen Fave A.E. Line- "'Cause the means Albert E equals M C Squared!" Fave S.H. Line- "There are 10,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 particles in the universe that we can observe, your mama took the ugly ones and put them into one nerd." Genghis Khan vs. the Easter Bunny-Genghis Fave G.K. Line- "Now my DNA's in dudes from New York to Japan!" Fave E.B. Line- ...I got nothing... Napolean Bonaparte vs. Napoleon Dynamite-Bonaparte Fave N.B. Line-(besides the French) "I'll whip you so bad they'll make a virgin meringue, you're the only type of dynamite that's never going to bang!" Fave N.D. Line- "This is a rap rollercoaster, you're not even tall enough to ride!"
Fave B.F Line- "I'm big Ben Franklin and this shant be pretty!" Fave B.M. Line- "With my lightning rod cock!" Fave V.O. Line- "Vince against a founding father is just too bad, 'cause after this America is gonna lose a dad!" Gandalf vs. Dumbledore-Dumbledore Fave G.G. Line- "YOU. SHALL. NOT. PASS!" Fave A.D. Line- (Way too many, so here's my top three!) "The prophecy forgot to mention this day, when I knocked your ass back to Gandalf the grey!" "Nice staff, you compensating for something?" "You think your harry toed friends are gonna harm me? Wait'll they get a taste of Dumbledore's Army!" William Shakespeare vs Dr. Suess through The Cat in the Hat and Things 1 and 2-Shakespeare Fave W.S. Line- "You crook you! I bet you wrote the Twilight books too!"(I don't even hate Twilight, but I love that Line) Fave C.H. Line-"You rap fast you do, yes you rap fast it's true." Fave T.1.2. Line- "Yo, you may have wrote the script, but now we running the show!" Mr. T vs Mr. Rogers-Mr. Rogers...not by much. Fave M.T. Line- "And your Mr. McFeely delivers a lot more than letters. So before you come to battle with your PBS crap, how bout I call up CPS about them kids on your lap fool!" Fave M.R. line- "I'll say this once Lawerence, I hope it's understood get right back in your van and get the fuck out of my neighborhood." Bonus points because Mr. McFeely's in the background with a baseball bat. Christopher Columbus v Captain Kirk-Used to be Christopher Columbus but Captain Kirk is growing on me Fave C.C. Line- "I'll stick up a flag up your ass and claim you for Spain!" Fave C.K. Line- "We'll see how Isabella likes my captain's log." BEST SONG ABOUT A BONER EVER!!!!!!!!! Best Disney Song EVER!!!!!!! Priests: Confiteor Deo Omnipotenti (I confess to God almighty) Frollo: Beata Maria Priests: Et tibit Pater (And to you, Father) Frollo: Beata Maria Priests: Quia peccavi nimis (That I have sinned) Frollo: Then tell me, Maria Cogitatione (In thought) I feel her, I see her Verbo et opere (In word and deed) Like fire Mea culpa (Through my fault) I'm not to blame Mea culpa (Through my fault) It is the gypsy girl Mea maxima culpa (Through my most griveous fault) It's not my fault Mea culpa (Through my fault) If in God's plan Mea culpa (Through my fault) He made the devil so much Mea maxima culpa (Through my most griveous fault) Protect me, Maria Guard knocks and Frollo stops just as he enters the room* (Spoken) Guard: Minister Frollo! The gypsy has escaped! Frollo: What???? Guard: She's nowhere in the Cathedral, she's gone. Frollo: But how I-Never mind. Get out you idiot! *Guard Leaves* I'll find her! I'll find her if I have to burn down all of Paris! Hellfire Kyrie Eleison (Lord have mercy) God have mercy on her Kyrie Eleison (Lord have mercy) God have mercy on me Kyrie Eleison (Lord have mercy) But she will be mine NICKNAMES REN- E.B., renren, Crayola, and the ever so dreaded (nice way to say I hate it) chibi-chan (And I'm not short dammit! ... I'm fun-sized)--Chibi Seme SARAH- ero-baka dos, uke-san (ha she's an uke, at least I got chibi seme)--Badass Uke LIA- dictator-sama, (yeah right like I'm ever gonna say that)-- DFWM Seme Quotes "You know a dude's hot when he can turn a straight guy gay, and a gay woman straight." - me/some of my friends "Whenever someone says life's not fair say 'Fuck you, fuck life, and while we're at it fuck the world too.'" - me "EMO FUDGE!!" - Lia (akatsuki and yaoi fangirl friend) "Your banana smells weird!!!!!" - Sarah (akatsuki and yaoi fangirl friend) "Taste the rainbow, Bitch!!"-Lia(must throw skittles while saying it) - ( but substituted acorns) "Purple pandas eating pizza next to emo elmo. Try saying that five times fast." - me "My fellow Americans, I've signed legislation that will outlaw Russia forever. We begin bombing in five minutes." --Ronald Reagan, about to go on the air for a radio broadcast, unaware that the microphone was already on. not by us, but Sarah thinks it's kinda funny. She loves Russia! "Why do humans always look to the sky? Why do you try so hard to fly when you don't have any wings?" - Kiba (Wolf's Rain) "Dying or getting killed isn't something unnatural. Living aimlessly without a purpose is." - Kiba (Wolf's Rain) "What's the point of living if it means throwing away your pride?!" - Kiba (Wolf's Rain) "Everyone's gonna die. It's a natural part of life. But if life has no purpose, you're dead already." - Kiba (Wolf's Rain) " If you wish to kill me, hate me, detest me, and live a detestable life... Run, run and cling to life. And one day, when you have the same eyes as me, come before me. " - Itachi Uchiha (Naruto) " So shut up about "destiny" and "inescapable fate...You shouldn't whine about such trivial stuff! Cause... unlike me... you're not a FAILURE." - Naruto Usumaki (Naruto) "I understand now. Even if I must take the devil's fruit, I must gain power. I am an avenger." - Sasuke Uchiha (Naruto) " A dropout will beat a genius through hard work." - Rock Lee (Naruto) "I am strong because i have people to protect." Naruto Uzumaki (Naruto) (Last words to Sasuke) "Now, cower in awe! Shout in despair! Because my art… is an EXPLOSION!" R.I.P. :( "Heh, I don't know what's going on, but I'm always up for getting wild."- Kiba (Naruto) Kiba...Oh I love him... (To Naruto) "You? Hokage? You can't even beat me! No-one's deluded enough to think that you have what it takes to become the next Hokage, not even you! Tell you what, though… I'll become Hokage in your place!"-Kiba (Naruto) This has to be one of the only moments I've ever been mad at Kiba and wanted his opponent to kick his ass. (To Ukon) "Let's die together."- Kiba Kiba. Literally one of 4 characters I have ever cried for (him, CHouji, Deidara, and Itachi) "Sasori… your strength came because of your soul, not in spite of it. You tried to erase it, to become a puppet yourself, but couldn't change completely. Now you've got your immortal body but you've fallen, sunk to the level of the puppets you used to control. You were supposed to be a top class ninja puppeteer, not a worthless nobody who lets someone else pull the strings."- Kankurou (Naruto) Such wise words... (To Naruto) "Aww, don't sweat it. Women always go weak in the knees for that cool, elite type of guy. So what can you do, am I right?" - Kankurou (Naruto) I DON'T!!!! TAKE ME NOW!!!!!!!! (To Kankurou) "If you don't stop talking to your puppets like they're alive, your friends will stop hanging out with you." - Temari (Naruto) (Last words to Sasuke) "Forgive me Sasuke… …It ends with this." - Itachi Uchiha. R.I.P my peaceful angel. (Naruto) (Last words) "Itachi… It seems that in the end… I'm not so terrible after all." - KIsame Hoshigaki. R.I.P my fearless warrior. (Naruto) (Before getting shot point blank by Ichigo Kurosaki's Cero) "...I see. No mercy? How very Hollow like. I don't mind, I have lost to you. I no longer have any meaning. DO IT." - Ulquiorra Cifer (Bleach) (To Ichigo Kurosaki) "Kill me. Quickly. I no longer have the strength to walk. If you do not cut me down now, then this fight will remain forever unsettled." - Ulquiorra Cifer (Bleach) (While dying) "I see. This. Yes. This thing in my hand is the heart?" - Ulquiorra Cifer (Bleach)The Espada who made emo Badass. "I wanna be cut so that my breath is gone before my body hits the ground. That's the kind of death I wanna have." - Nnoitra Gilga (Bleach) NOW SOMETHING TO CHEER YOU UP! ^^ (To Sebastian) "This is great! I'm getting goosebumps all over my body, Little Sebas-chan! If I have your child, I will definitely give birth to it!" -Grell Sutcliff (Kuroshitsuji) "I'm a butler to die for!" - Grell Sutcliff (Kuroshitsuji) It's True! "Red is the colour of firey passion and I. Am. Flaming~" - Grell Sutcliff (Kuroshitsuji) (To Sebastian) "If it's your child I have the urge to bear it!" - Grell Sutcliff (Kuroshitsuji) (To Sebastian)' "Let us play a wonderful Hide and Seek!" - Grell Sutcliff (Kuroshitsuji) "No matter how much love I put in, it won't bear fruit... It's like... The tragic love story of Romeo and Juliet!" - Grell Sutcliff (Kuroshitsuji) To Sebastian) "Found you... Hottie" - Grell Sutcliff (Kuroshitsuji) |
Curse of the Dogs by I love creepy things reviews
Redmail by Syntaxeme reviews
Keep Awake by Good Luck Mode reviews
Phoenix Rising by Kai Maciel reviews
As The Water Rises by Jesse J Maximoff reviews
The CAKE Girls by Musings of Sara reviews
More stories of Kittens by TearsoftheFallen reviews
Chibi Days! Let the random begin! by 1Zara-Uchiha1 reviews
Dead Poetry by Crazy Dr Giggles reviews
Nick, If you're readin' this by zombie4play reviews
Naruto Redone by Sella94 reviews
My Protector by Mekon-chan reviews
My kidnaper, My master by DeeaE reviews
Skyrim: The Silver Chronicle by CommanderFlynn reviews
A Deck of Criminals by Navi-at-Heart reviews
Cause honey, you know you want me by Freak-show101 reviews
maid outfits and handcuffs by psyco dancing fruit reviews
Secrets in the Dark by Blackened Wing reviews
Surviving with you was the last thing I needed by xChollieBearx reviews
Agent DuckButt by Juura99 reviews
Life is Full of Surprises by Kira michi reviews
A Little Something For Him by Crazy Dr Giggles reviews
Man, I Miss the Kitties by DaniZaraki reviews
Why Guys Love Girls by BleakRememberance reviews
Growing Up by YaoiPhox reviews
What to Expect When You're Not Expecting by WhipOfLightHeartOfSword reviews
Death Or Glory by Tazer444 reviews
The Dome by AnntheHedgehog reviews
Unfinished Business by Incognito-san6928 reviews
Cure for Hiccups by Klavieres reviews
Real Friends and those people you walk around with by N Harmonic reviews
Aim Straight For The Heart by xyukiiix reviews
Caller IDK by Orange Sherbet reviews
New Konoha Genins by DrMaggieXD reviews
Of Conmen and Rednecks by I.Write.Love reviews
Akatsuki Cosplay Cafe by Infinite Vibrance reviews
Tsunami by Jesse J Maximoff reviews
The Rabbit Died by Ritsucracker reviews
Akatsuki Kittehs WTF! by LolAvatarWolfs reviews
We're All Dogs Here by Nibi-Nekomata reviews
Help, I'm Alive by Euphoric Dysphoria reviews
Curious by MelodicMadness reviews
Extra Credit by elarielf reviews
46 Feelings by Shadow of Arashi reviews
Good Directions by scythequeen reviews
The Wonderful World of Video Games by Naruphonia13 reviews
Affection by BleakRememberance reviews
Welcome To My World by Awesomely-Awesome Alice reviews
i though i loved you then by crankyXwhenXprovoked reviews
Don't Tell Me If I'm Dying by I.Write.Love reviews
Proposal by I.Write.Love reviews
Arachnophobia by cOo.Me reviews
Midnight Memories by Daydreamer79 reviews
Old McCharger by Weezle reviews
Hope by I.Write.Love reviews
A Diamond by Naruphonia13 reviews
I Go Back to December All the Time by Naruphonia13 reviews
Coming on Strong by Summer Wonderland reviews
God, it burns by Mako75 reviews
The Seme Uke Games by Tyranno's girl reviews
Consider Yourselves Kitties by DaniZaraki reviews
Testing by MidnightSpade reviews
Scream My Name by Rocketship Romance reviews
Baby, I Love You by Arata Kiyoshi reviews
Perfect by Crazy Dr Giggles reviews
Highschool Sucks by She's A Keeper reviews
Crush: Uke Ichigo Collection by BonneNuit reviews
Fagility by S t f u E l i
Dancing Deadly by Angeluswings reviews
Konoha no Gogyou Tokage by Yukihana Hisako reviews
Karma by Xylexia reviews
Talk Dirty To Me by ChaosViper reviews
A Mother's Love by TenshiXXX reviews
Chameleon by Pyro'sGirl224 reviews
I Really Like Yah, Nick by Crazy Dr Giggles reviews
Why do you like Shikamaru? by SEAubrey reviews
Desire's Catalyst by Penguita38 reviews
Kitty Kurse by Ailarii reviews
Obedience by MoonyXmadness reviews
Temptation by ChaosViper reviews
Sleepless by Mistress Penelopye reviews
Worthy by MoonyXmadness reviews
Strawberry Bad Boy by Mistress Penelopye reviews
Ice Dragon's Angel by AttitudeDragon reviews
These scars by unholynight reviews
In the Dark by Troublesque reviews
St Xocolat's Day by Blackened Wing reviews
Heat by hitagashi reviews
A Love's Caress by ShiniBarton reviews
Blackout by Troublesque reviews
The Beauty of Red by Chasingyesterday reviews
Akatsuki Unleashed by AMTNaruto reviews
Permanent Marking Period by Kaze and Kiba reviews
Things to Look Forward To by darkalbino reviews
Heated: A Kiba x Kankuro Story by calhale reviews
House Call by CassandraChristine
The Doctors by CassandraChristine reviews
Take the Lead by Blackened Wing reviews
A Dark Alley by ShiniBarton reviews
Coming Undone by Vicious-Loner reviews
Five Hundred Miles by Blackened Wing reviews
More than One Way to Skin an Orange by Blackened Wing reviews
the dog puppet by bored spitless reviews
Blood Moon by Blackened Wing reviews
After Hours by ShiniBarton reviews
My Little puppy by TaiLey6 reviews
Who is the Prey? by Organized Desaster98 reviews
A Little Bit Of Peace And Quiet by yaoilovergirl reviews
The King and I by ShiniBarton reviews
Crimson by yaoifangirl42 reviews
Crimson Door by Blackened Wing reviews
Detention by yaoifangirl42 reviews
Realization by LunaAriana reviews
Yaoi Love by XxXTob-SanXxX reviews
When light turns to darkness by thegirlofmanymoods reviews
Reject Me by Gaaras-Gothic-Ninja-Sappy-Sue reviews
The Last of Sanity by andchipzz reviews
Inamorato by firefly reviews
Leatherpants by Mako75 reviews
Naruto Valentines by yaoi coveness reviews
The MarySue Checklist reviews
We're as Good as Gone reviews