Hey. I actually have no idea what to write in these profile boxes, so I actually went on WikiHow to learn how to write one, but...then I realized how pathetic that was, so I logged off my computer to play Angry Birds. Which, in my opinion, makes me much less pathetic.

I am youflirtedwithsherlockholmes on tumblr.

A few more things about me...

SHERLOCK!!!!!

OMFGJKL; I cannot express my love for this show in words. I love Sherlock. Johnlock is canon. Everything about Sherlock. It is my life now. A certain someone introduced me to Sherlock this summer, and it has completely and utterly ruined my life.

I am completely in love this show.

Click here for an amazing compilation of all the insults Sherlock throws around.

Click here for Benedict Cumberbatch reading Ode to A Nightingale...instant eargasm.

Click here to listen to the most epic soundtrack ever composed.

Click here for a compilation of the Johnlock moments.

So yeah. Sherlock is my life. PM me if you love it too and we can fangirl together :)

Fictional Crushes:

Jace Wayland

Sherlock Holmes (BBC)

Matt Cruse

Draco Malfoy

Finnick Odiar.

Dr. John Watson (BBC)

Peeta Mellark

Oliver Wood

Alec Lightwood

etc.

Well, this is fanfiction, so I should probably let you know what books and stuff I'm interested in.

For books...

The Hunger Games

Harry Potter

The Mortal Instruments/Infernal Devices

Percy Jackson and the Olympians

Sherlock Holmes

The Help

The Book Thief

Life of Pi

For movies...

Mission: Impossible

The Titanic

Men in Black

Inception

The Shawshank Redemption

Life is Beautiful

Amadeus

Slumdog Millionaire

Pirates of the Carribean

And musicals...

Sound of Music

Phantom of the Opera

Cats

Singing in the Rain

Mamma Mia

Hairspray

Evita

Jesus Christ Superstar

West Side Story

Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat

My Fair Lady

And TV shows...

SHERLOCK!!!!!

Glee

The Mortal Instruments are the most quotable books known to man. I love, love, LOVE some of the quotes there! Here are some of my favourites:

Simon and Jace banter:

Jace: Do you remember back at the hotel when you promised that if we lived, you'd get dressed up in a nurse's outfit and give me a sponge bath?
Clary: It was Simon who promised you the sponge bath.
Simon: As soon as I'm back on my feet, handsome.
Jace: I knew we should have left you a rat.
-CoB

She heard a squeak, and the rat's pink nose poked out from beneath the bar. With an exclamation of relief, Clary seized the rat in her hands. "Simon! You understood me!"
The rat, huddled in the hollow of her palms, squeaked glumly. Delighted, she hugged him to her chest. "Oh, poor baby," she crooned, almost as if he really were a pet. "Poor Simon, it'll be fine, I promise-"
"I wouldn't feel too sorry for him," Jace said. "That's probably the closest he's ever gotten to second base."
-CoB

"We have to turn him back."
"Let's not be hasty." Jace was actually grinning, the bastard. He reached toward Simon as if he meant to pet him. "He's cute like that. Look at his little pink nose."
-CoB

In the future, Clarissa," he (Jace) said, "it might be wise to mention that you already have a man in your bed, to avoid such tedious situations."
"You invited him into bed?" Simon demanded, looking shaken.
"Ridiculous, isn't it?" said Jace. "We would never have all fit."
-CoB

"'Well, I'm not kissing the mundane,' said Jace. 'I'd rather stay down here and rot.'
'Forever?' said Simon. 'Forever's an awfully long time.'
Jace raised his eyebrows. 'I knew it,' he said. 'You want to kiss me, don't you?'
-CoB

I’m always so glad I have no idea what you’re vacantly chattering about,” said Jace. “It fills me with a sense of peace and well-being.”
-CoFA

Sexy-as-hell Jace:

"What would you know about it?" he said. "Love, I mean."
Dorothea folded her soft white hands in her lap. "More than you might think," she said. "Didn't I read your tea leaves, Shadowhunter? Have you fallen in love with the wrong person yet?"
Jace said, "Unfortunately, Lady of the Haven, my one true love remains myself."
Dorothea roared at that. "At least," she said, "you don't have to worry about rejection, Jace Wayland."
"Not necessarily. I turn myself down occasionally, just to keep it interesting."
-CoB

Clary turned instant traitor against her gender. "Those girls on the other side of the car are staring at you."
Jace assumed an air of mellow gratification. "Of course they are," he said. "I am stunningly attractive."
"Haven't you ever heard that modesty is an attractive trait?"
"Only from ugly people," Jace confided. "The meek may inherit the earth, but at the moment it belongs to the conceited. Like me." He winked at the girls, who giggled and hid behind their hair.
-CoB

Jace looked over his shoulder, noticing that he had caught her attention. A sly grin spread across his face, before his first accusation escaped his lips, "You're going to confess that after I flipped through your sketch pad and got upset that there weren't any pictures of me in it, you went back and added some!"
Clary's eyes widened. Jace's grin grew.
"A-ha! So you admit it! You went back and added the torrid fantasies and the steamy romance novel covers and the tragic love movies posters! Seriously Clary, I told you before, if you ever needed a nude model, all you had to do was ask!"
-CoB

"My hair is naturally blonde... Just for the record." Jace
-CoB

"So now he's back from the dead and he's come looking for [Jocelyn]. Maybe he wants to get back together." - Isabelle
"I kind of doubt he sent a Ravener demon to her house because he wants to 'get back together,'" said Alec.
"It wouldn't be my move," Jace agreed. "First the candy and flowers, then the apology letters, then the ravenous demon hordes. In that order."
-CoB

"Is this when you start tearing strips off your T-shirt to bind up my wound?" she joked.
"If you wanted me to rip my clothes off, you could have just asked. It would have been a lot less painful." Jace
-CoB

"Don't order any of the faerie food," said Jace, looking at her over the top of his menu. "It tends to make humans a little crazy. One minute you're munching a faerie plumb, the next minute you're running naked down Madison Avenue with antlers on your head. Not," he added hastily, "that this has ever happened to me."
-CoB

"Maybe we should all have code names." - Isabelle
"Good idea," said Jace. "I shall be Baron Hotschaft Von Hugenstein."
-CoB

Jace: Actually, I prefer to think that I'm a liar in a way that's uniquely my own.
-CoA

“Oh, you know. Jace reminds me of an old boyfriend. Some guys look at you like they want sex. Jace looks at you like you've already had sex, it was great, and now you're just friends--even though you want more. Drives girls crazy. You know what I mean?"
Yes, Clary thought. "No," she said.
CoA

“I think she just asked if she could touch my mango.”
-CoFA

The Forever Awesome Simon:

Simon:That's why when major badasses greet each other in movies, they don't say anything, they just nod. The nod means, 'I' am a badass, and I recognize that you, too, are a badass,' but they don't say anything because they're Wolverine and Magneto and it would mess up their vibe to explain.
-CoB

Luke: ...however,there is something you should have. Something every Shadowhunter should have.
Simon: An obnoxious, arrogant attitude?
-CoA

“Mom. I have something to tell you. I’m undead. Now, I know you may have some preconceived notions about the undead. I know you may not be comfortable with the idea of me being undead. But I’m here to tell you that undead are just like you and me … well, okay. Possibly more like me than you.”
-CoA

Simon: Okay, now I want to say something smart-ass back at you, but all I can think is-
Clary: That you want sex?
Simon: Stop that. That I love you.
Clary: So you don't want sex?
Simon: I didn't say that.
-CoG

"Was it weird, hearing from Jace?" asked Simon, his voice carefully neutral. "I mean, since you found out…"
His voice trailed off.
"Yes?" said Clary, her voiced sharply edged. "Since I found out what? That he's a killer transvestite who molests cats?"
"No wonder that cat of his hates everyone."
-CoG

Sherlock is also amazingly quotable.

A Study in Pink

Sherlock Holmes: Sorry, gotta dash, I think I left my riding crop in the mortuary.

Molly Hooper: I was wondering if you’d like to have coffee?
Sherlock Holmes: Black, two sugars please. I’ll be upstairs.

John Watson: Of course it was. It was extraordinary. It was quite... extraordinary.
Sherlock Holmes: That’s not what people normally say.
John Watson: What do people normally say?
Sherlock Holmes: "Piss off!"

Sherlock Holmes: Ah, Anderson. Here we are again.
Anderson: It's a crime scene. I don't want it contaminated! Are we clear on that?
Sherlock Holmes: Very clear. Is your wife away for long?
Anderson: Oh don't pretend you worked that out! Somebody told you that!
Sherlock Holmes: Your deodorant told me that.
Anderson: My deodorant.
Sherlock Holmes: It's for men.
Anderson: Well of course it's for men! I'm wearing it!
Sherlock Holmes: So's Sergeant Donovan. [sniffs] Ooh... I think it just vaporised. May I go in?
Anderson: Now look, whatever you're implying-
Sherlock Holmes: I'm not implying anything. I'm sure Sally came round for a nice little chat, and just happened to stay over. And I assume she scrubbed your floor, going by the state of her knees.

Sherlock Holmes: Shut up.
Detective Inspector Lestrade: I didn't say anyth—
Sherlock Holmes: You were thinking. It's annoying.

Sherlock Holmes: Dear God. What is it like in your funny little brains? It must be so boring.

John Watson: You don’t have a girlfriend, then?
Sherlock Holmes: Girlfriend? No, not really my area.
John Watson: Oh right then. [pause] Do you have a boyfriend? Which is fine, by the way —
Sherlock Holmes: I know it’s fine.
John Watson: So you’ve got a boyfriend?
Sherlock Holmes: No.
John Watson: Right, okay. You’re unattached, just like me. Fine. Good.
Sherlock Holmes: John, um... I think you should know that I consider myself married to my work and while I am flattered by your interest I’m —
John Watson: No—
Sherlock Holmes: —really not looking for anyone—
John Watson: No. I’m not asking—no. I was just saying. It’s all fine.
Sherlock Holmes: Good. Thank you.

Sherlock Holmes: We've got a serial killer on our hands. Love those, there's always something to look forward to.

Sherlock Holmes: Did he offer you money to spy on me...?
John Watson: Yes.
Sherlock Holmes: Did you take it?
John Watson: ...No?
Sherlock Holmes: Pity, we could've split the fee. Think it through next time.

Sgt. Sally Donovan: Are these human eyes?
Sherlock Holmes: Put those back!
Sgt. Sally Donovan: They were in the microwave!
Sherlock Holmes: It's an experiment!

Sherlock Holmes: Shut up everybody, shut up! Don't move, don't speak, don't breathe, I'm trying to think. Anderson, face the other way, you're putting me off.
Anderson: What, my face is?

Sherlock Holmes: Anderson, don't talk out loud. You lower the IQ of the whole street.

Sherlock Holmes: ... Ha. Look at you lot. You're all so vacant. Is it nice not being me? It must be so relaxing.

Sherlock Holmes: Why have I got this blanket? They keep putting this blanket on me!
Lestrade: Yeah, that's for shock.
Sherlock Holmes: I'm not in shock!
Lestrade: Yeah... but some of the guys want to take photographs.

Dr John Watson: Stop it! We can't giggle at a crime scene.

The Blind Banker

John Watson: Where are we headed?
Sherlock Holmes: I need to ask some advice.
John Watson: What? Sorry?
Sherlock Holmes: You heard me perfectly, I'm not saying it again.

DI Dimmock: Your friend...He's an arrogant sod.
John Watson: ...Well, that was mild.

John Watson: [when Sherlock is not answering the door] Oh, because, I'm Sherlock Holmes and I always work alone, because no one else can compete with my massive intellect!

Sherlock Holmes: I need to get some air; we're going out tonight.
John Watson: Actually, I've got a date.
Sherlock Holmes: What?
John Watson: It's when two people who like each other go out and have fun...
Sherlock Homes: That's what I was suggesting.
John Watson: No, it wasn't. At least, I hope not.

Sherlock Holmes: How would you describe me John, resourceful, dynamic, enigmatic?
John Watson: Late?

The Great Game

Sherlock Holmes: Bored... [shoots the wall] BORED! [continues to shoot wall] BORED! BORED! [stops, hands the gun to Watson] Don't know what's got into the criminal classes. Good job I'm not one of them.

[John opens the refrigerator and finds a human head inside; he does a double check to make sure he isn't seeing things]
John Watson: It's a head. A severed head.
Sherlock Holmes: Just tea for me, thanks.

Sherlock Holmes: I see you've written up the taxi driver case. "A Study In Pink". Nice.
Dr. John Watson: Well, you know. A pink lady, pink case, pink phone. There was a lot of pink. Did you like it?
Sherlock Holmes: Ummmm, no!
Dr. John Watson: Why not? I thought you'd be flattered.
Sherlock Holmes: Flattered? "Sherlock sees through everything and everyone in seconds. What's incredible, though, is how spectacularly ignorant he is about some things."
John Watson: Now hang on a minute, I didn't mean that--
Sherlock Holmes: [sarcastic] Oh, you meant "spectacularly ignorant" in a nice way!

Sherlock Holmes: So we go around the sun! If we went around the moon or round and round the garden like a teddy bear, it wouldn't make any difference! All that matters to me is the work! Without that, my brain rots. Put that in your blog - or better still, stop inflicting your opinions on the world!

Sherlock Holmes: Don't make people into heroes, John. Heroes don't exist, and if they did, I wouldn't be one of them.

Sherlock Holmes: [watching television] No, no, NO! Of course he's not the boy's father! Look at the turn-ups on his jeans!

Jim Moriarty: [Enters through a side door] I gave you my number. I thought you might call. Is that a British Army Browning L9A1 in your pocket, or are you just pleased to see me?

John Watson: I'm glad no one saw that.
Sherlock Holmes: Mm?
John Watson: You ripping my clothes off in a darkened swimming pool. People might talk.

A Scandal in Belgravia

Little Girl: They wouldn't let us see Grandad when he was dead. Is that cos he'd gone to heaven?
Sherlock Holmes: People don't really go to heaven when they die. They're taken to a special room and burned.

John Watson: Are you wearing any pants?
Sherlock Holmes: ...No.

Mycroft Holmes: Don't be alarmed. It's to do with sex.
Sherlock Holmes: Sex doesn't alarm me.
Mycroft Holmes: [smirking] How would you know?

Sherlock Holmes: Punch me in the face.
John Watson: Punch you?
Sherlock Holmes: Yes, punch me, in the face. Didn't you hear me?
John Watson: I always hear "punch me in the face" when you're speaking, but it's usually subtext.

Irene Adler: Look at those cheekbones. I could cut myself slapping that face. Would you like me to try?

Sherlock Holmes: If I wanted to look at naked women I'd borrow John's laptop.

Irene Adler: Brainy is the new sexy.

Sherlock Holmes: Mrs. Hudson, leave Baker Street? England would fall!

Irene Adler: Everything I said. It’s not real. I was just playing the game.
Sherlock Holmes: I know. And this is just losing.

Mycroft Holmes: My brother has the brain of a scientist or a philosopher, yet he elects to be a detective. What might we deduce about his heart?
John Watson: I don't know.
Mycroft Holmes: Neither do I. But initially, he wanted to be a pirate.

The Hounds of Baskerville

[Sherlock bursts into the room, covered in blood, brandishing a harpoon]
Sherlock Holmes: Well that was tedious.
John Watson: You went on the Tube like that?
Sherlock Holmes: None of the cabs would take me.

[Sherlock starts deducing a client]
John Watson: Not now, Sherlock.
Sherlock Holmes: Oh, please. I've been cooped up here for ages.
John Watson: You're just showing off.
Sherlock Holmes: Of course. I am a show-off, that's what we do.

Sherlock Holmes: Apologize? Oh John, I envy you so much. Your mind; it's so placid, straight-forward, barely used. Mine's like an engine, racing out of control; a rocket tearing itself to pieces, trapped on the launchpad... I need a case!

Sherlock Holmes: Listen, what I said before John, I meant it. I don't have friends; I've just got one.
John Watson: [Nods] Right. [Continues walking away]
Sherlock Holmes: [Calling after him] John? John! [Running after him] You are amazing, you are fantastic!
John Watson: Yes, alright, don't have to overdo it.

Sherlock: [Discussing drug testing on John] I knew what effect it had on a superior mind so I needed to try it on an average one. [John stops eating and looks up, insulted.] You know what I mean.

The Reichenbach Fall

Jim Moriarty: Every fairy tale needs a good old fashioned villain. You need me or you're nothing — because we're just alike, you and I. Except you're boring. You're on the side of the angels.

Jim Moriarty: But don't be scared. Falling is just like flying, except there's a more... permanent destination.

Sherlock Holmes: Thank you, John.
Molly Hooper: Molly.
Sherlock Holmes: Yes.

Sherlock Holmes: [On being arrested] Hmm. Bit awkward, this.
John Watson: There's no one to bail us.
Sherlock Holmes: I was thinking more about our imminent and daring escape.

Mycroft Holmes: Too much history between us, John. Old scores. Resentments.
John Watson: [smirks] Nicked all his smurfs? Broke his Action Man?

Sherlock Holmes: [John struggles to keep up with Sherlock as they flee handcuffed together] Take my hand [Grabs John's hand].
John Watson: Oh, people are definitely going to talk.

Sherlock Holmes: Alone is what I have. Alone protects me.
John Watson: No. Friends protect people.

Jim Moriarty: Sherlock, your big brother and all the King's horses couldn't make me do a thing I didn't want to.
Sherlock Holmes: Yes, but I'm not my brother, remember? I am you. Prepared to do anything. Prepared to burn. Prepared to do what ordinary people won't do. You want me to shake hands with you in hell? I shall not disappoint you.
Jim Moriarty: Nah,— you talk big. Nah … you're ordinary. You're ordinary — you're on the side of the angels.
Sherlock Holmes: Oh, I may be on the side of the angels...but don't think for one second that I am one of them.

Aaaaaand...get ready to cry...
John Watson: You … you told me once … that you weren't a hero. Umm… There were times when I didn't even think you were human, but let me tell you this. You were the best man, the most human ... human being that I've ever known and no one will ever convince me that you told me a lie, and so ... there. I was so alone ... and I owe you so much. But please, there's just one more thing, one more thing, one more miracle , Sherlock, for me, don't be ... dead. Would you do that just for me? Just stop it. Stop this…

So basically...I have no life. I have a 26-page long document on Word full of Sherlock quotes. I read it when I feel bad about not having a social life.

In addition to fanfiction, I like going on...

cracked

tumblr (no account yet, because I know how much more procrastinating I'm going to do once I get it...and it is inevitable, trust me.)

cheezburger network

youtube

Sparklife