Hi, my name is Katanagirl16!

AS OF 7/19/10 I AM ON PERMANANT HIATUS, I'M SORRY. BUT MY ORIGINAL NOVELS ARE MORE IMPORTANT TO ME RIGHT NOW.

Someday I do plan to finish my stories, but I'm just not able to do so at this time.

NOTE TO THE PEOPLE I BETA FOR: I'M STILL ACCEPTING ALL THE CHAPTERS YOU SEND ME, HOWEVER I'M NO LONGER ACCEPTING NEW AUTHORS. THANK YOU.

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Here's some stuff about me:

Age: you can't ask a lady that.

Gender: Female.

Location: the Northern Hemisphere

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I am now co-writing a new improved version of "Ghost of the Past" with Ganja Naraku, titled "Rage of the Forgotten"

A link to his profile is here -- Ganja Naraku

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My story extras:

"Submission and Requisition":

Barricade's Pretender form: See full size image

Barricade's new car alt mode: mustangattitude.com/.../ 2008/2008_00015_01

Prowl's car alt mode:

"Submitting, And Why It Ain't So Bad":

Barricade's alt mode: mustangattitude.com/.../ 2008/2008_00015_01

Barricade's holoform: See full size image

Barricade's holoform fan art by TheJaxter:Barricade for Katanagirl16
(YAY!! I have FAN ART!!)

Chromia's alt mode: Saturn Sky Red Line Sports Car

Elita's alt mode: See full size image

"Cowgirl Princess":

Sam's gown:

Jake's tuxedo:

"Rage of the Forgotten"

Artwork for RotF, by our wonderfully talented artist The First Magelord

Chapter five preview:

Chapter five illustration:

Jedi symbol:

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Rules to writting Chipmunks fanfictions. Written by: Chipmunklover and Mossnose (Kitty Seville)

1) They are brothers, nothing else.
Nope, they're sisters, mousesess, and friends. (Cue Friends theme song)

2) They must always live with Dave.
No, they're going to live in a water tower.

3) They must always end up with the Chipettes. Alvin can hit on other girls, but he must end up with Brittany.
Noooooo! They're going to end up old wrinkled and alone!

4) They cannot die.
So they're IMMORTAL?!

5) They can have superpowers, but the color of the magic/ mystical zone has to he the same color as they're signature colors.
No. Alvin'll have pink, Simon sarchurse, and Theodore purple.

6) They can't die.
Nah, they can. We're just going to crush a lot of little kids dreams of meeting real walking, talking Chipmunks. What's wrong with that? Wait!! Why is this on here twice?!

7) They can't be severely injured.
There goes about 15 percent of the stories.

8) There cannot be any OCs. Only the Chipmunks, Dave, and the characters created my the Bagdasarians.
There goes the other 85 percent.

9) The Chipettes HAVE to live with Miss Miller.
No, they'll live in pet shop.

10) If you kill them, thus violating numbers 4 and 6, you must bring them back. Also making it a horror story.
Now they're really IMMORTAL! They're ZOMBIES!!

11) They can't be in horror stories.
So what's the point of ten? Doesn't that make it redundant?

12) You must have at least three jokes/gags in a chapter.
What if someone's dead or dieing? Will we be arrested by clowns?

13) If you do a Chipmunk crossover, it must be with some other cartoon. Not live action.
What if it's live action Chipmunks?

14) If you have songs, they have to fit in the story. Not just be random.
When you have concerts in the story, the songs aren't random. They're meant to be there!! Take that!!

15) The Chipmunks do not work for free. If you use them you must send Ross Bagdasarian 100 dollars by the end of the month, or else you'll die instantly.
What if it's the last day of the month?

16) Don't talk about the rules, don't tell people about the rules, don't even think about the rules.
We just broke that one posting them!! (We broke it making them! HAHAHAHAHA!)

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Things I Am Not Allowed To Do At Hogwarts:

1) The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date to the Yule Ball

2) I am not allowed to sing, "We're Off to See the Wizard" while skipping off to the Headmaster's office

3) I am not allowed to take out a life insurance policy on Harry Potter

4) I am not allowed to ask Dumbledore to show you the pointy hat trick

5) I am not allowed to give Remus Lupin a flea collar

6) I am not allowed to bring a Magic 8 Ball to Divination

7) I am not allowed to say that Seamus Finnegan is "after my lucky charms"

8) I am not allowed to start a betting pool on this years Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher. It's taste-less, tacky, and not a good money-making strategy.

9) I am not allowed to joke about Remus' "time of the month"

10) I am not allowed to make light saber sounds with my wand

11) I am not allowed to give Hagrid Pokemon cards and convince him they're real animals

12) I am not to refer to the Accio charm as "The Force"

13) I am not allowed to claim that growing marijuana or hallucinogenic mushrooms is "Extra Herbology Work"

14) I will not you my socks to make hand-puppets of the Slytherin-House mascot

15) If the thought of a spell makes me giggle for more than 15 seconds, assume that I am not allowed to use it

16) I will not lock the Slytherin's and Gryffindor's in a room together and bet on which House will come out alive

17) I will not charm the suits of armor to do a rendition of "The Knight's of the Round Table" for the Christmas Feast

18) I am not allowed to declare an offical "Hug A Slytherin Day"

19) I am not allowed to sing my own personal spy music while wandering the hallways

20) It is not necessary to yell, "BURN!" Whenever Snape takes points away from Gryffindor

21) I will not say the phrase, "Get a Life" to Voldemort

22) First years are not to be fed to Fluffy

23) I will never ask Harry if his Voldie senses are tingling

24) I will stop referring to showering as "Giving Moaning-Myrtle an eye-ful"

25) I will not make, "OMG" a spell

26) It is not necessary to yell, "BAM" every time I Apparate

27) I will not steal Gryffindor's sword from Dumbledore's office and use it to patrol the hallways

28) I will not poke Hufflepuff's with spoons, nor shall I insist that their color's indicate that they're "covered in bee's"

29) "I've heard every joke possible about Oliver Wood's name" is not a challenge

30) I will not go to class sky clad

31) I will not use Umbridge's quiz to write, "Told you I was Hard Core"

32) If a class-mate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that and draw a Dark Mark on their arm

33) House Elves are not acceptable replacements for Bludgers

34) I will not start every potion's class by asking Snape if the potion is acceptable as Body Lotion

35) I will not call the Weasly twins, "bookends"

36) I will not call the Patil twins, "bookends"

37) I will not call the Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher Kenny, even if he is wearing an orange anorak

38) There is no such thing as a were-thylacine

39) I will not give Luna Lovegood Coast-To-Coast AM transcripts

40) Tricking a school House Elf to strip of it's clothing does not make it mine. Yes, even when I yell out "PWND!"

41) I do not weigh the same as a Duck

42) I do not have a Dalek Patronous

43) I will not lick Trevor

44) Gryffindor Courage does not come in bottles labeled, "Firewhiskey"

45) I will not dress up as Voldemort on Halloween

46) It is a bad idea to tell Snape he takes himself to seriously

47) I will not tell Sir Cadogan that The Knight's Who Say Ni have challenged him to a duel, then have all the students say, 'Ni' from various directions

48) I am not the King of the Potato People and I do not have a flying carpet

49) "To conqur the Earth with an army of flying monkeys" is not a career choice

50) I will not tell the first years that Professor Snape is the Voice of God

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37 Things to do in an Elevator

1. Crack open your briefcase or handbag, peer inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
2. Stand silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
4. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5. Meow occasionally.
6. Stare at another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM!" - and back away slowly.
7. Say "DING!" at each floor.
8. Say "I wonder what all these do?" and push all the red buttons.
9. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10. Stare grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."
11. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"
12. Try to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."
14. When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
15. As you are coming to the end of the journey, get emotional and have a group hug. Tell them that you will never forget them.
16. Ask if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17. Hold the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"
18. Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"
19. Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20. Pretend you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.
21. Swat at flies that don't exist.
22. Call out "Group hug!" then enforce it.
23. Make car race noises when someone gets on or off.
24. Congratulate all for being in the same lift with you.
25. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!"
26. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
27. While the doors are opening, hurriedly whisper, "Hide it...quick!" then whistle innocently.
28. Let your cell phone ring - don't answer it.
29. Walk into the lift and say "This reminds me of being buried alive. Ah, those were the days..."
30. Take shoes off before entering. Then look shocked and disgusted when the others don't.
31. Ask people which floor they want, say in 'Who want to be a millionaire' style is that your final answer.
32. Also in your bellboy act, ask what floor they want. Whatever they say, give them a glare and say "you should be ashamed of yourself!", and leave the lift tutting.
33. Ask, "Did you feel that?"
34. Tell people that you can see their aura.
35. When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again."
36. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."
37. Dress up in a long, black cloak with a hood, stare and in a deep voice announce "It is time..."

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20 ways to maintain a healthy level of insanity:

1: At lunch time, sit in you car with sunglasses on and point a hair dry at passing cars; see if they slow down

2: Page yourself over the intercom. Do not disguise your voice.

3: Every time some one asks you to do something, ask them if they want fries with that

4: Put you garbage can on your desk and label it "IN"

5: Put decaf in the coffee maker (home or work). When everyone gets over their caffeine addiction, switch to espresso

6: In your memo book, on all your checks, put "FOR SMUGGLING DIAMONDS"

7: Finish all your sentences with "In Accordance To The Prophecy"

8: Dont use any punctuation

9: As often as possible, skip instead of walking

10: Order diet water whenever you go out with a serious face

11: Specify that your drive-thru order is "TO GO"

12: Sing along at the opera

13: Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme

14: Put mosquito netting around your work area (or room) and play tropical sounds all day

15: 5 days in advance, tell your friend that you can't go to their party cause you don't 'feel like it'

16: Have friends or coworkers address you by your wrestling name "Rock Bottom"

17: When the cash comes out of the ATM yell, "I WON, I WON"

18: When exiting the zoo, start running toward the parking lot, yelling, "Run for your lives they're loose"

19: Tell your children (or younger sibling) that "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go"

20: And the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity is... Copy this and put it on your profile!

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EYE TEST

Count every "F" in the following text:

FINISHED FILES ARE THE RE
SULT OF YEARS OF SCIENTI
FIC STUDY COMBINED WITH
THE EXPERIENCE OF YEARS...

HOW MANY?

THERE ARE 6 - no joke.
READ IT AGAIN !
Really, go Back and Try to find the 6 F's.

The reasoning behind this is the brain cannot process 'OF'

Anyone who counts all 6 "F's" on the first go is a genius.
Copy and paste it to your profile!

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What a Boyfriend SHOULD do:

When she walks away from you mad
Follow her

When she stares at your mouth
Kiss her

When she pushes you or hits you
Grab her and don't let go

When she starts cussing at you
Kiss her and tell her you love her

When she's quiet
Ask her whats wrong

When she ignores you
Give her your attention

When she pulls away
Pull her back

When you see her at her worst
Tell her she's beautiful

When you see her start crying
Just hold her and don't say a word

When you see her walking
Sneak up and hug her waist from behind

When she's scared
Protect her

When she lays her head on your shoulder
Tilt her head up and kiss her

When she steals your favorite hat
Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night

When she teases you
Tease her back and make her laugh

When she doesn't answer for a long time
Reassure her that everything is okay

When she looks at you with doubt
Back yourself up

When she says that she likes you
she really does more than you could understand

When she grabs at your hands
Hold hers and play with her fingers

When she bumps into you
bump into her back and make her laugh

When she tells you a secret
keep it safe and untold

When she looks at you in your eyes
don't look away until she does

When she misses you
she's hurting inside

When you break her heart
the pain never really goes away

When she says its over
she still wants you to be hers

When she reposts this bulletin
she wants you to read it -

Stay on the phone with her even if she's not saying anything.-

When she says she's ok don't believe it, talk with her- because 10 years later she'll remember you-

Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her-

Treat her like she's all that matters to you.-

Tease her and let her tease you back.-

Stay up all night with her when she's sick.-

Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid.-

Give her the world.-

Let her wear your clothes.-

When she's bored and sad, hang out with her.-

Let her know she's important.-

Kiss her in the pouring rain.-

When she runs up to you crying, the first thing you say is;
"Who's ass am I kicking?"

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Girls Don't Realize These Things

I'm sorry
that I bought you roses
to tell you that I like you

I'm sorry
That I was raised with respect
not to sleep with you when you were drunk

I'm sorry
That my body's not ripped enough
to "satisfy" your wants

I'm sorry
that I open your car door,
and pull out your chair like I was raised

I'm sorry
That I'm not cute enough
to be "your guy"

I'm sorry
That I am actually nice;
not a jerk

I'm sorry
I don't have a huge bank account
to buy you expensive things

I'm sorry
I like to spend quality nights at home
cuddling with you, instead of at a club

I'm sorry
I would rather make love to you then just screw you
like some random guy.

I'm sorry
That I am always the one you need to talk to,
but never good enough to date

I'm sorry
That I always held your hair back when you threw up, and didn't get mad at you for puking in my car,
but when we went out you went home with another guy

I'm sorry
That I am there to pick you up at 4am when your new man hit you and dropped you off in the middle of nowhere,
but not good enough to listen to me when I need a friend

I'm sorry
If I start not being there because it hurts being used as a door mat, only to be thrown to the side when the new jerk comes around

I'm sorry
If I don't answer my phone anymore when you call, to listen to you cry for hours, instead of getting a couple hours of sleep before work

I'm sorry
that you can't realize.. I've been the one all along.

I'm sorry
If you read this and know somebody like this
but don't care

But most of all

I'm sorry
For not being sorry anymore

I'm sorry
That you can't accept me for who I am

I'm sorry
I can never do anything right, and nothing that I do is good
enough to make it in your world.

I'm sorry
I caught your boyfriend with another girl and told you about it, I thought that was what friends were for...

I'm sorry
That I told you I loved you and actually meant it.

I'm sorry
That I talked to you for nine hours on Thanksgiving when your boyfriend was threatening you instead of spending time with my family.

I'm Sorry
That I cared

I'm sorry
that I listen to you at night talking about how you wish you could have done something different.

Ladies always complain and gripe to their friends that there is never any good guys out there, and they always end up with assholes who mistreat them. Well ladies, next time you're complaining, maybe look up to see who you're complaining to, maybe that special someone is right there hanging on your every word as usual, screaming in his head "Why won't you give me a chance?"
Because the person you are usually searching for is right by you.

If you're a guy and you agree with this letter, copy and paste into your profile as 'I'm sorry'

If You're one of the FEW girls with enough BALLS to copy and paste this into your profile, and you would never make your guy feel this way, copy and paste into your profile as 'Girls Don't Realize These Things'

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List twelve of your favorite characters from your fandom, in no particular order. Then answer the questions about them. (I'll try Harry Potter this time)

1. Salazar Slytherin

2. Tom Marvolo Riddle

3. Harry Potter

4. Rowena Ravenclaw

5. Remus Lupin

6. Draco Malfoy

7. Sirius Black

8. Godric Gryffindor

9. Lily Evans

10. Helga Hufflepuff

11. Severus Snape

12. The Basilisk

1. Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fic? Do you want to?

Draco/Severus . . . I don't think so. No, I think they're Uncle to Nephewish.

2. Do you think Four is hot? How hot?

No.

3. What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant?

snickers The Basilisk got poor Godric preggers? Poor Godric.

4. Can you recall any fics about Nine?

Yes.

5. Would Two and Six make a good couple?

Tom/Draco, hmm, no.

6. Five/Nine or Five/Ten? Why?

Remus/Lily or Remus/Helga, hmm, Helga, because of the two it sounds more interesting.

7. What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve having sex?

Sirius walked in on Tom and The Basilisk, oh God, LOL, The Basilisk would kill him with his/her eyes.

9. Is there any such thing as One/Eight fluff?

Salazar/Godric, hmm, not sure.

10. Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve hurt/comfort fic.

Sirius/The Basilisk, hmm, Walking Among Ghosts.

11. Does anyone on your friends list read Three het?

Harry, eh, no, none of my friends like HP, sob.

12. Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven?

Severus, see above answer.

13. Would anyone on your friends list write Two/Four/Five?

Tom/Rowena/Remus, again see answer to 11. (though I would like to read it.)

14. If you wrote a Song-fic about Eight, what song would you choose?

Godric Gryffindor, hmm, um, eh, uh . . . gosh I don't know . . . meh, let's make it a crack fic and say Just Can't Wait to be King.

15. If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warning be?

Salazar/Draco/The Basilisk, hmm, Time-travel, bestiality, insanity.

16. When was the last time you read a fic about Five?

Remus, um . . . yesterday.

17. "(1) and (7) are in a happy relationship until (9) runs off with (7). (1), brokenhearted, has a hot one-night stand with (11) and a brief unhappy affair with (12), then follows the wise advice of (5) and finds true love with (3).

Salazar and Sirius are in a happy relationship until Lily runs off with Sirius. Salazar, brokenhearted, has a hot one-night stand with Severus and a brief unhappy affair with The Basilisk, then follows the wise advice of Remus and finds true love with Harry.

What title would you give this fic?

Time Traveling Through The Ages

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The last outcome of question 17.

Anakin and Obi-wan are in a happy relationship until Yoda runs off with Obi-wan. Anakin, brokenhearted, has a hot one-night stand with Siri, and a brief unhappy affair with Qui-gon, then follows the wise advise of Han and finds true love with Ahsoka.

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Quotes from various places:

"If you can't stand behind our troops, then feel free to stand in front of them." - bumper sticker wisdom.

I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer. ~ Douglas Adams

I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally. ~ W.C. Fields

Yes, madam, I am drunk. But in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly. ~ Winston Churchill

Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into a even smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill-designed for the purpose. ~ Winston Churchill

I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the ordeal of meeting me is another matter. ~ Winston Churchill