I like The Wall And The Wing and Rose Redmont and the Magic Carpet. But I have read so many books that I love them all.

The road splits as the golden leaves fall

From the homes' of tiny folk

High in the trees the wind wistles through the branches.

Sayings

Most learn by observation. Some learn by experimentation. And then there are those who actually touch the fire to see if it is hot.

We're not retreating! We're advancing backwards.

If "Plan A" didn't work, the alphabet has twenty-five more letters so stay cool. Once you get to "Plan Z" and it's still not working, then you can panic.

Real versus Fake

FAKE FRIENDS: Never ask for food.
REAL FRIENDS: Are the reason you have no food.

FAKE FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr/Mrs.
REAL FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD/MOM.

FAKE FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong.
REAL FRIENDS: Will sit next to you saying “Damn, that was fun. Let's do it again!"

FAKE FRIENDS: Never seen you cry.
REAL FRIENDS: Kick the ass of whatever made you cry.

FAKE FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.
REAL FRIENDS: Keep your junk so long they forget its yours.

FAKE FRIENDS: Know a few things about you.
REAL FRIENDS: Can write a book about you, with direct quotes from you.

FAKE FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
REAL FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you.

FAKE FRIENDS: Will knock on your front door.
REAL FRIENDS: Walk right in and say “I’M HOME!”

FAKE FRIENDS: Are for awhile.
REAL FRIENDS: Are for life.

FAKE FRIENDS: Say they are too busy to listen to your problems, but when it comes to them expect you to have all the time in the world.
REAL FRIENDS: Not only kick everything out of their schedule to listen to whats wrong, but help come up with the most vindictive plans to make you feel a whole lot better!

FAKE FRIENDS: Say no when you want to talk to them at odd hours of the night, or even just hang out at odd hours. REAL FRIENDS: Talk on the phone or come right over and hang out with you, until you either fall asleep, or kick them out.

FAKE FRIENDS: Will ignore this
REAL FRIENDS: Will repost it

FAKE FRIENDS: Point out all the mistakes you're making
REAL FRIENDS: Will watch you and let you pretend you know what you're doing

What my mother taught me:

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION. "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC. "Because I said so, that's why.

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY. "Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS. "Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. "Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA. "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER. "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY. "If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE. "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. "Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY. "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION. "Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING. "You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE. "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP. "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR. "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT. "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS. "You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS. "Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM. "When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE. "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

REMEMBER WHEN

REMEMBER WHEN getting HIGH meant swinging at a playground?
The worst thing you could get from a boy was COOTIES?
MOM was your hero and DAD was the boy you were gonna marry?
when your W0RST ENEMIES were your siblings and RACE ISSUES were about who ran the fastest?
when WAR was a card game and life was SIMPLE and CAREFREE?
remember when all you wanted to do WAS GROW UP?

Thank yoooooou for this incredible next bit: Calyso1211!

I am that girl, the one who likes books more than boys. The one who pretends not to be sad, just to make others happy. The one who always wonders what she did wrong. The one who writes to escape. The one who just wants to help. The one that really wants to make a difference. The one that sticks to her values. The one that refuses to believe that this is it. The one that will do anything to make a better tomorrow. Copy and Paste if you can relate to this.

I am the girl...that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird, and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cellphone or regular phone. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain.

But I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn't care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with what she loves and is obsessed with, who can express herself beter with words than with words, and knows the importance of the little things.

Copy and Paste this onto your account if you are anything like me, so the girls who are diffrent and unique can know in their weakest times that they are unique, but not alone.

If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.

90 of teens today would die if Myspace had a system failure and was completely destroyed. If you are one of the 10 that would be laughing/hacked the site in the first place, copy and paste this to your Profile.

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.

If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever accidentally stabbed yourself or someone else with a pencil, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you like filling your profile with 'copy this into your profile' thingys, then COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!

If you've walked under something that was about two feet above your head and ducked anyway copy and paste this is your profile

If you have ever laughed at something that you wouldn't normally laugh at because it was really late at night, copy this into your profile

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile. Oh the irony...

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.

If you forgot your phone number when some one asks for it copy this into your profile.

If several inanimate objects hate you copy and paste this into your profile!

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this onto your profile.

Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. copy this into your profile if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "where to begin?"

Only crazy people can understand the brilliance of crazy things. If you are crazy and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile!

My friends used to be simi-normal. Then they met me.

If you talk back to the TV, copy this into your profile.

Perseus Jackson. Savior of Olympus.

Electricity. That's what will shock you if you mess with Thalia Grace.

Riptide. Percy's lethal ballpoint pen.

Clarisse. That's who will go after you if you beat her in a battle. (And you don't want an angry Clarisse. It's bad enough when she's not angry.)

Yellow duffle bags. Helped Percy, Tyson, and Annabeth.

Jason Grace. Thalia's "lost" little brother.

Annabeth Chase. Percy's girlfriend and official architect of Olympus.

Chiron. Trainer of heroes.

Kaleidoscope. What Piper's eyes look like to Jason.

Son of Neptune. The book we can't wait for.

Olympus. Home of the gods.

Nemesis. Ethan's mother. Don't worry, she's getting her revenge on his death.

Apollo. The god of music, prophecy, sanity, truth, poetry, reason, healing, disease, archery, and the sun.

Never back down. The phrase that reminds me of TLO.

Dionysus. The god of wine. (More like the god of Diet Coke.)

Thalia Grace. Hunter of Artemis and daughter of Zeus.

Hephaestus. The father of our favorite fire boy. ;)

Empathy link. What Grover and Percy have. Saved Grover's life a couple of times.

Officers. The immortal skeletons dressed up as officers.

Lupa. The she-wolf we all want to know about.

Morpheus. The gods of dreams. Put NYC asleep during TLO.

Persephone. The kidnapped wife of Hades. Believes every hero is brave and wants to give them a chance.

Illiterates. Many kids believe some of the demigods are illiterates.

Artemis. Goddess of the Hunt. Has hunters, including Thalia.

Nothing lasts forever. Even the gods.

If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you ever wonder if your pets are Animagi (because after Scabbers you just don't know.) post this on your profile.

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile

If your obsessed with fan fiction, copy this to your profile.

If you think your insane because you say so, copy and pate this into your profile.

If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy this into your profile

If you or your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile

If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile.

If you ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this to your profile

If you have ever copy and pasted something to your profile, copy and paste this to your profile

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile.

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.

I do not do drugs. I do sugar. If you're someone who does sugar, copy this into your profile.

If you’ve ever made faces in front of a security camera then paste this in your profile

If you have ever said something and two seconds later, completely forgot, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you get bored easily, copy and paste this to your profile.

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.

If you've written a fanfic, copy and paste this to your profile and add another chapter.

98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile.

If you have ever had a crush on a book character copy this to your profile.

If you hear the voices of characters in your head, put this onto your profile.

If you are obsessed with FanFiction, put this into your profile.

If you've ever wondered what you're like in a parallel universe, put this on your profile.

Geeks are smart. Geeks are cool. Geeks make up over 70 percent of the Universe's populace, or this one's, anyway. So geeks overpower all the rich and popular people, anyway. If you are a geek and proud of it, put this on your profile.

Did you know the average American only reads 3 books a year? If you don't believe that it's even possible to read that little, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever seen a movie or a TV show so many times you can quote it word for word and you do at random times or when the moment seems to need a quote, even when whoever you are quoting it to doesn't understand it; put this in your profile.

If there are characters on a certain show that you HATE BEYOND ALL REASON... copy and paste this into your profile

Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.

If you should be doing homework right now, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you can easily finish three novels in one day, put this on your profile!

If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile.

If you get way to excited for books, movies, or TV etc. to come out/be release/premiere, copy this into your profile.

If you secretly hoped to get a letter from Hogwarts when you were eleven, put this in your profile.

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer

If you have more than 100 books in your room, copy this into your profile.

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.

If you have ever fallen off a chair backwards, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever done anything stupid in your life, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile.

If you've ever been so insane that you scare yourself, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever ran into a lamppost or some tall, metal pole that is blatently obvious copy this into your profile.

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you like being utterly random copy and paste this on your profile

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever read past two in the morning, copy this onto your profile

If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the conversation copy this on your profile

If you think girls should rule the world and that it would be a better place copy this onto your profile

If you're against animal cruelty (horse slaughter, bear bating, dolphin hunting, chimp slavery etc) then copy this into your profile!

If you wonder who started these thingamawhatevers, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say right before you were going to say it copy this on your profile

If you have ever laughed so hard you either choked, hyperventalated, had your sides cramp, or all of the above copy and paste this on your profile

If you have ever had an arguent with yourself and LOST, copy and paste this on you profile

You have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking copy and paste this on your profile.

97% of teens would cry if they saw Robert Pattison (Edward Cullen from Twilight) standing on top of a skyscraper, about to
jump. If you're one of the 3% who would sit, eating popcorn screaming "DO A BACK FLIP YOU SPARKLY IDIOT!" then copy and paste this on your status. :D

Justin Beiber falls off a building 90% of girls are crying. 9% are taking pictures and eating popcorn. 1% are pushing Justin off the building. Copy and paste this on your status if your one of the 9% or 1% pushing Justin off the building.

This is This cat
This is is cat
This is how cat
This is to cat
This is keep cat
This is an cat
This is idiot cat
This is busy cat
This is for cat
This is forty cat
This is seconds cat

Go back and read the 3rd word in every sentence.

"Let us find the dam snack bar," Zoe said. "We should eat while we can."
Grover cracked a smile. "The dam snack bar?"
Zoe blinked. "Yes. What is funny?"
"Nothing," Grover said, trying to keep a straight face. "I could use some dam french fries."
Even Thalia smiled at that. "And I need to use the dam restroom." I started cracking up, and Thalia and Grover joined in, while Zoe just looked at me. "I do not understand."
"I want to use the dam water fountain," Grover said.
"And..." Thalia tried to catch her breath. "I want to buy a dam t-shirt."

-Percy, Zoe, Thalia and Grover

If you've ever wanted to go into a book and slap/scream at a character copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever copy and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you're that person who checks their email every few minutes to see if anyone reviewed/favorite/alerted/PM'd you, copy and paste this onto your profile

Reasons why girls are better than boys

1. We got off the Titanic first

2. We get to flirt with systems support men who always return our calls, and are nice to us when we blow up our computers.

3. Our boyfriend's clothes make us look elfin & gorgeous. Guys look like complete idiots in ours.

4. We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.

5. We can cry and get off speeding fines.

6. We've never lusted after a cartoon character or the central female figure in a computer game.

7. Taxis stop for us.

8. Men die earlier, so we get to cash in on the life insurance.

9. We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.

10. Free drinks, free dinners, free movies ... (you get the point).

11. We can hug our friends without wondering if she thinks we're gay.

12. We can hug our friends without wondering if WE'RE gay.

13. New lipstick gives us a whole new lease on life.

14. It's possible to live our whole lives without ever taking a group shower.

15. We don't have to fart to amuse ourselves.

16. If we forget to shave, no one has to know.

17. We can congratulate our team-mate without ever touching her butt.

18. If we have a zit, we know how to conceal it.

19. We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.

20. If we're dumb, some people will find it cute.

21. We don't have to memorize Caddy shack or Fletch to fit in.

22. We have the ability to dress ourselves.

23. We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.

24. If we marry someone 20 years younger, we're aware that we look like an idiot.

25. Our friends won't think we're weird if we ask whether there's spinach in our teeth.

26. There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.

27. We'll never regret piercing our ears.

28. We can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.

29. We know which glass was ours by the lipstick mark.

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?"

Ninety-three percent of the teen population would die if Abercrombie and Fitch said it wasn't cool to breathe. Copy and paste this if you would be part of the seven percent that'd be LAUGHING YOUR BUTT OFF!

A girl asked a guy if she was pretty; he said no. She asked him if he wanted her; he said no. She asked him if she left, would he cry; he said no. She turned to leave; he grabbed her arm and said, 'You're not pretty, you're beautiful. And I don't want, I need you. And I wouldn't cry if you left; I would die."

Don’t take life too seriously, you won’t get out alive.

You’re just jealous because the voices only talk to me.

When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, “Where the heck is the ceiling?”

When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it.

The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening," and then tells you why it's not.

I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why! Because paper can't beat anybody! A rock would tear it up in two seconds. When I play Rock, Paper, Scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my readymade fist and say, “Oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you.”

They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people.

Don't knock on death's door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice.

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.

Don't forget Mother's Day, or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad's Third Wife Day.

“I didn’t even know this place existed!”

“It doesn’t.”

CallingMeFakeWontMakeYouReal: Thank you soooo much for these two poems.

My name is Sarah
I am but three,
My eyes are swollen
I cannot see,

I must be stupid
I must be bad,
What else could have made
My daddy so mad?

I wish I were better
I wish I weren't ugly,
Then maybe my mommy
Would still want to hug me.

I can't speak at all
I can't do a wrong
Or else I'm locked up
All the day long.

When I awake
I'm all alone
The house is dark
My folks aren't home

When my mommy does come
I'll try and be nice,
So maybe I'll get just
One whipping tonight.

Don't make a sound!
I just heard a car
My daddy is back
From Charlie's Bar.

I hear him curse
My name he calls
I press myself
Against the wall

I try and hide
From his evil eyes
I'm so afraid now
I'm starting to cry

He finds me weeping
He shouts ugly words,
He says its my fault
That he suffers at work.

He slaps me and hits me
And yells at me more,
I finally get free
And I run for the door.

He's already locked it
And I start to bawl,
He takes me and throws me
Against the hard wall.

I fall to the floor
With my bones nearly broken,
And my daddy continues
With more bad words spoken.

"I'm sorry!", I scream
But its now much too late
His face has been twisted
Into unimaginable hate

The hurt and the pain
Again and again
Oh please God, have mercy!
Oh please let it end!

And he finally stops
And heads for the door,
While I lay there motionless
Sprawled on the floor

My name is Sarah
And I am but three,
Tonight my daddy
Murdered me.

Disclaimer: I didn't make this poem but if you are against child abuse, put this on your profile and pass it on.

Try not to cry

Mommy... Johnny brought a gun to school,

He told his friends that it was cool,

And when he pulled the trigger back,

It shot with a great, huge crack.

Mommy, I was a good girl, I did what I was told,

I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold!

When I went to school that day,

I never said good-bye.

I'm sorry that I had to go, But Mommy, please don't cry.

When Johnny shot the gun, he hit me and another,

And all because Johnny, got the gun from his brother.

Mommy, please tell Daddy; That I love him very much,

And please tell Zack; my boyfriend; That it wasn't just a crush.

And tell my little sister; That she is the only one now, And tell my dear sweet grandmother; I'll be waiting for her now

And tell my wonderful friends; That they always were the best

Mommy, I'm not the first, I'm no better than the rest

Mommy, tell my teachers; I won't show up for class,

And never to forget this, And please don't let this pass

Mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one, though deserves this.

But Mommy, it's not fair, I left without a kiss.

I think I even saw one doctor, trying not to cry.

Mommy, I'm slowly dying, with a bullet in my chest,

But Mommy please remember, I'm in heaven with the rest

When I heard that great, big crack,

I ran as fast as I could

Please listen to me if you would,

I wanted to go to college,

I wanted to try things that were new

I guess I'm not going with Daddy,

On that trip to the new zoo

I wanted to get married,

I wanted to have a kid,

I wanted to be an actress, I really wanted to live.

But Mommy I must go now,

The time is getting late,

Mommy, tell my Zack,

I'm sorry I had to cancel the date.

I love you Mommy, I always have, I know you know its true

And Mommy - all I need to say is, "Mommy, I love you"

In Memory of The Columbine & Virginia Tech
Students Who Were Lost

Disclaimer: I don't own this poem either but please pass this on for all the young students who lost their lives that day.

KatnissMockingjay! Thanks are owed!

REPOST IF YOU THINK STEREOTYPING IS WRONG AND BOLDFACE THE ONES THAT APPLY TO YOU

I'm EMO sometimes, so I MUST cut my wrists

I'm BLACK, so I MUST carry a gun.

I'm HISPANIC, so I must be dirty. (Hispanic people are cool)

I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be smart.

I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.

I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.

I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.

I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.

I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.

I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.

I'm WHITE, so I MUST be racist.

I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.

I'm an ATHEIST, so I MUST hate the world.

I DON'T HAVE A RELIGION, so I MUST have no morals.

I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.

I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.

I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.

I'm JAMAICAN, so I MUST smoke weed.

I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.

I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.

I take ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.

I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.

I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.

I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.

I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST work at a casino.

I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.

I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a stuck up whore.

I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.

I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.

I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.

I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.

I'm RICH (ish), so I MUST be a conceited snob.

I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a Goth.

I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a stupid ditz.

I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.

I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.

I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.

I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.

I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.

I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals.

I'm ITALIAN, so I MUST have a big peter.

I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.

I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.

I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.

I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.

I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.

I'm INTO THEATER ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.

I'm a VEGETERIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.

I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be gay.

I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.

I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.

I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool.

I have GERMAN HERITAGE, so I MUST be a Nazi.

I hang out with GAYS, so I MUST be GAY TOO.

I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG ASS.

I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.

I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.

I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.

I'm HAWAIIAN, so I MUST be lazy.

I'm a STONER, so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.

I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly or crazy.

I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon and fried chicken.

I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.

I'm ASIAN, so I MUST have a small penis.

I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.

I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.

I'm PREP, so I MUST be rich.

I don't like the SUN, so I MUST worship Satan.

I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.

I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.

I couldn't hurt a FLY, so I MUST be a pussy.

I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.

I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.

I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.

I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.

I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.

I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.

My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.

I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.

I read COMICS, so I MUST be a loser.

I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE, so I MUST be a whore myself.

I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse.

I'm CALIFORNIAN so I MUST know how to surf.

I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist.

I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.

I draw ANIME, so I MUST be a freak.

I am a FANGIRL, so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.

I'm an ONLY CHILD, so I MUST be spoiled.

I'm INTELLIGENT, so I MUST be weak.

I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.

I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep.

I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.

I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.

I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.

I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.

I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on welfare.

I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.

I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.

I like BLOOD, so I MUST be a VAMPIRE.

I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.

I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and A MURDERER!

I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.

I'm WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.

I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE.

I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser.

I care about the ENVIRONMENT, so I MUST be a tree hugging hippy.

I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.

I CHAT, so I MUST be having cyber sex.

I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins.

I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan.

I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against abortion.

I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.

I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.

I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.

I like READING (LOTS!!!!!), so I MUST be a LONER.

I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.

I'm WICCAN (not really, but thinking about it), so I MUST be a SATANIST.

I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.

I'm a WITCH (see wiccan), so I MUST be an OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.

I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.

I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED.

I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast.

I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish.

I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.

I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.

I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.

I’m STRONG, so I MUST be stupid.

I'm AUSTRALIAN, so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroos.

I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times.

I’m GAY, so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.

I don’t want a BOYFRIEND, so I MUST be Lesbian.

I'm NOT CHRISTIAN, so I MUST just need converting.

I love MARCHING BANDS, so I MUST be a friendless freak.

I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.

I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.

I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.

I can't help pointing out mistakes, so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist.

I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, then burst into tears at one mistake.

I sit with my back straight and chew with my mouth closed, I MUST be posh and stuck up.

I'm OCD so I MUST point out every single little thing that's WRONG and make people fix it.

I'm an AUSTRALIAN so I must talk really funny

I copied and pasted this into my profile, so I MUST have no life. (OH YEAH!!! :) )

What do you think?

Peeta/Katniss

Meh.

Gale/Katniss

As lovers, yes.

Gale/Madge

NO WAY!!

Peeta/Madge

Uh... haha... erm... no.

Finnick/Katniss

They're like siblings!

Finnick/Annie

Like Romeo and Juliet - maybe... if Juilet was disabled...

Peeta/Johanna

NO!!!!

Finnick/Johanna

Who put this on here?!

Madge/Katniss

Super. Close.

If Katniss didn't win the Games...

CRY MY HEART OUT... then go find Suzanne Collins, hold her at gun point, and make her rewrite it so Rue (or Katniss) wins!

If Peeta died...

Who cares?

If Gale died...

I would cry!

If Finnick died...

NOOOOOOO!!!!!

If Rue lived...

I would be happy FOREVER!!!

If Haymitch stopped drinking...

Who would that be?

If Katniss chose Peeta...

She already did!

If Katniss chose Gale...

YESSSS!!!

If President Snow died...

HALEUJA!

If Voldemort took over...

Stuff him.

This or That?

I think I'll go with this. 'Cause that is where it's at.

Katniss or Gale?

Katniss :D

Gale or Peeta?

Gale

Finnick or Peeta?

Finnick!

President Snow or Peeta?

Peeta :P

Katniss or Madge?

Katniss

Madge or Thresh?

Madge (Who by the way is not in the movie... WTH?)

Rue or Clove?

Rue 4 EVA!!!!!!!!

Cato or President Snow?

Snow... DON'T KILL ME!!!!!!

19 THINGS TO DO AT a Big Departement Store, K-Mart, Big W, etc

1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.

2. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, " 'Code 3' in housewares..." and see what happens.

5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on layby.

6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

9. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.

10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.

11. Dart around the store suspiciously, loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

12. In the auto department, practice your 'Madonna look' using different size funnels.

13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "NO! NO! It's those voices again!"

15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!

16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "Pikachu, I choose you!"

17. If you get caught, run as fast as you can, grab whatever clothes you can fit in, and put them on, run to the café and pretend to be in line/reading at the table. See if the person runs past you.

18. Bring a friend, have one of you get in a cart, have the other one push, and grab random items off shelves, putting them in your cart and then go up to the cash register and have the one pushing say “How much is this person?” See how they react.

19. Walk around the store pointing to people with your fingers forming a gun and yell “Bang!” when they turn to look at you.

Repost if you laughed... or are planning to do any of these things.

FRIENDS/BEST FRIENDS

FRIENDS: Will comfort you when he rejects you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."

FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall.

BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?"

FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince.

BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you.

FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.

BEST FRIENDS: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha ha, loser!"

FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda.

BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you.

FRIENDS:Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month.

BEST FRIENDS: Will throw you a tampon and push you in.

FRIENDS: Gives you their umbrella in the rain.

BEST FRIENDS: Takes yours and says, "Run - beep - run!"

FRIENDS: Will help you move.

BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies.

FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.

BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr. and Mrs. and call your Grandpa Grandpa.

BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "DAMN! We messed up!"

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.

BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when you're not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.

BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.

BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad... here's a tissue."

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.

BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.

BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you.

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.

BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.

BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. (aka: drinking buddies)

BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.

BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Girl, drink the rest of that ! You know we don't waste!"

FRIENDS: Would read this and ignore it.

BEST FRIENDS: Will repost this shit.