I'm a Tourettes sufferer, yeah.

Do you have any idea how hard it is to find a job or a decent hobby when you got Tourettes? Hard as tits.

Anyway, I don't really have anything more to say about myself, so let me just give you an idea of how J has affected my life. -That's the OC you see in almost every story I've written- I've had dreams where he's come to life. So here's a short story telling you how that went down.

Yeah I like this word format for my stories, weird aint it?
No?
Oh, oh well.

So there I am.
Sitting at my computer, wondering whether or not I should waste my money on another airsoft gun until I come across the Samurai edge from Resident evil.
It's pretty cool, just a standard M92 with some cool trades and grips on it.
I start counting the money I've got saved until I hear a strange voice behind me.

"You gonna get in in black or chrome?"

It's a voice I've never heard before, when I turn in my chair I see J. A character who only exists on paper and the internet because of me, he's soaking wet and barely covering himself with a towel.

"J?" I asked, wondering if it was him or I'd gotten drunk and invited some stranger to sleep in my house.

"Yeah? What?" He asked before rubbing his hair with the towel, showing the scars and tattoos all over his body.

"What are you doing here?" I asked before realizing something stranger.

"And how did you use my shower?" I was more confused than I was in top level maths, except this time I wasn't trying to rip a maths textbook apart with my bare teeth.

"I live here... And you pull the cord and press the button, then water comes out. What's the big deal?" He explained as he walked over to a wardrobe that didn't exist before.

"Oh." I sighed as if that was the end of it.

Instead of dwelling on it any further, I went back to my original dilemma.

"I don't know if I want it though, it's cool but I might never use my other pistol again." I rubbed my head in stress.

"Get another 1911 then, I don't know. Or why don't you get your power supply fixed or save up for something?" J asked like he didn't care in the slightest and was more interested in putting on pajamas.

"Was I saving for a computer or an airsoft gun? You live in my head, so tell me." I kind of got angry with him, after all he was all I used to think about for a while.

"I don't know, I'm more worried if you're trying to get me to sleep with Jesse from Breaking Bad. That's another thing." J sort of snapped at me, tossing a t-shirt at me.

"When are you going to write that story on Tsun island, the one with the cyborgs standing in for police and the gang conflict, when are you going to do that one eh?" He snapped.

"When I find the right universe to set it in, what's wrong, can't wait for Jack to break up with your or something?" I crossed a line.

J just stared at me, water still trickling down his body. His eyes narrowed at me.

"So you have been working on it." He spoke slowly.

"I'm sick of putting drafts up as finished stories and then going back to re-write them. It's ridiculous, and that story is it's on IP, you don't fit into to any other world in that sense. So yes, I've written a few chapters of that; I've written a chapter with you in Left 4 Dead 2, I've written you in a dating sim I played when I got my first decent phone. I wrote you in a Sherlock Tomb Raider crossover for fucks sake J. Where does it end?!" I stood up and raged at him.

J backed down, almost as if my fat ass had scared him somehow. After all, I could format my hard drive and erase his existence at any time. When I realized what I'd done, I felt like I'd yelled at a puppy for walking into a closed door, he didn't know any better.

"I'm sorry J." I sighed.

He nodded, not looking into my eyes as he did so.

"Me too." He sighed.

I rolled my eyes and gave him a quick hug just to cheer him up a little. He just didn't get it, writing takes time especially when you work all week. When I tried to let go of him, he just clung on to my shirt.

"Wanna watch Dank Memes?" I joked.

He shook his head.

"Wanna watch that guy going crazy listening to rap music?" I asked, just to get him to let go.

He nodded.

So we watched it.

Then I woke up laughing and everything was normal, so I wrote this.

Yeah, I'm weird like that.