*Hiatus* Izzy Swan-Mason hates her husband. No, really. She despises him. What happens when space and opportunity present themselves to a woman on the edge of her sanity? AH AU B/E Rated M for Language and later Lemons.

**A Comedy** Edward dazzles Mike! Eric has a dance-off against Emmett! Rosalie is actually nice to the humans! Is this Twilight or the Twilight Zone? No, it’s just a "missing moment" of the Graduation Party in Eclipse from Mike Newton’s POV!

After the first disastrous camping trip Bella and the Cullens are ready to put it behind them and move toward the upcoming wedding, until Charlie's 'thank you' present sends the household back into a panic - and back to the woods. Uh oh.

Charlie insists Bella go camping with the Cullens in order to acclimate herself with the great outdoors. After all, the Cullens are practically revered in town for their family camping trips, so they must know what they're doing, right? *Post Eclipse

Harry decides it is time that the Cullen's house was vampire proof. Has a mention of a male/male pairing, but nothing else.

Edward Cullen thinks everything is going well. He has just found that he is strong enough to kiss the girl- there's only one problem. That girl isn't a girl, and he has all the requisite...bits. One-shot. Twilight/HP. Rated for adult language.

Bella is always reluctant when Edward wants to buy her a new car. Is there a secret reason she likes her truck so much? And don't worry where they are driving. It doesn't matter.

A funny parody of what should have happened the day Bella figured out exactly what Edward Cullen was... “O-OH MY GOD! I figured it out! SO THIS MEANS THAT YOU…THAT YOU ARE…” --R&R-- Hope this makes you LOL...literally!--

For the Twilight Challenges August Challenge, to celebrate the creation of the Emmett AntiDefamation Society, your choice of Emmett opportunities: 1. In Emmett and the Bear, Emmett says, I thought what happened next was my judgment. I'd had a little too m

The Cullens have always been quite a stange family, besides the fact theat they are vampires. Now their most embarresing, weird, and craziest moments are revieled in these chpters of petrifyingly funny stories!

Bella discovers the positive side of being older than Edward, and decides to have some fun of her own to get back at her vampire sweetheart for not changing her sooner. Rated T to be safe...

Origanilly a oneshot, but it was hard to resist! How does doghnuts, Rosalie, and hair mix? What is Emmett's blinky thing? Why does Alice despise McDonalds? How can Jasper be a life gaurd? What is Esme better at doing than Carlisle? LOVE REVIEWS!

After Felix burns Volturi Castle down with Aro's curling iron, the fearless leader himself gets it into his head that they should move to Forks and be neighbors with the Cullens- mainly to stalk Carlisle. It all goes to hell from there. Beware Caius's swearing. - CRACK; woe to you if you take Twilight seriously. - DISCONTINUED.

Another comedy arrives on FF! The readers of Twilight will enjoy this unusual take on Edward and Bella's story. WARNING unlike other parodies, this one is actually good and carefully written. No spelling or grammar mistakes here!

Total Crackfic, A Co-Winner in Pastiche Pens Humor Contest. Rated M for nudity,violence, language and bad taste. Edward fights the bloodlust and his family tries to help

It all started with a game of Truth or Dare. Now, the Cullens will remember that summer for the rest of their eternal lives. WARNING This fanfiction includes Edward as a stripper, DETENTION, Jazz being eaten and Bella getting arrested... by Charlie.

Takes place during Edward's bachelor party. Fluff and mild-sexual references. Edward's PoV. ONESHOT! R&R “Really Edward, some people think eternal damnation and marriage are synonymous.”

If you are reading this, that means you've just purchased your very own ALICE CULLEN. Go through the guide for more information on the item purchased. Funny.one-shot

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What does Emmett get up to in his spare time? Pay back and Hilarious material promised. I did not write the Twilight Series, it is Specifically Stephanie Meyers Series.

One-Shot: Emmett dresses up in his cowboy getup to impress Rosalie and to reveal his secret passion to her. Let's just say Rosalie is a little more than impressed. What roll does Edward play in this very steamy moment? AH, OOC. A Twilight Award nominee.

Alice has a personal project no one knows about. After finding out her cousins Edward and Emmett are moving to Forks she devises a plan to see to it that her best friends Bella and Rosalie fall for them. Will her project be a success? AH/OOC/Award Nominee

If you are reading this, that means you've just purchased your very own EMMETT CULLEN. Go throught the guide for more information on the item purchased. Funny.one-shot

If you are reading this, that means you've just purchased your very own EDWARD CULLEN. Go throught the guide for more information on the item purchased. Funny.one-shot

Jacob wakes up one day to find... A ZIT! Pure comedy one-shot... Random... but funny... I hope ...