Sometimes, an average family has secrets. The residents of 1313 Mockingbird Lane have more secrets than most. Perhaps their biggest secret is how family comes first and foremost. Once he turns 11, young Harry Munster is offered a place at the Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry, but he isn't interested, for four reasons. Dodgers, Dresses, Teddy bears, and Spot.

Harry Potter was programmed to die. Sometimes thing don't go as planned. A crossover with DC Comics Deadman.

When Hagrid arrives at the Potter cottage in Godric's Hollow, he finds no sign of Harry Potter. It takes five long years for Harry to be found, in the care of a distant cousin, having been dropped off by his Great Grand Mother.

A Potterized classic Python Sketch

When Harry is six and a half, he meets a pair of strangers on the street. One is leaving for his own life, and the other is looking to start over. Harry volunteers to help and discovers a world of adventure such as he never dreamed.

When he learns that flying anywhere near a Dragon is a recipe for suicide, Harry tries a last minute change of tactics, one designed to use the power of the Bureaucracy forcing him to compete against itself. Little does he know that his solution is its own kind of trap.

What if Lilly was a little more prepared to escape if Voldemort came calling. She knew that the Floo and Portkeys could be disabled, what if she had found a back door? Just a silly little story of a somewhat different Harry

Harry returns from a personal 5 year crusade to find that something very important in his life has changed.

During in the raid on the Ministry of Magic at the end of Harry's 5th year, Harry ended up in a firefight in the Time Room and vanished.

It all starts with Hogwarts' Class Reunion.

It takes two thieves, a Dark Wizard, and a Tentacle Monster named Tim.

"Don't knock on death's door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that." - H/Hr/L/ Sorta Tonks - Comedy, Slight Crack, Two omakes/shorts - Oneshot

Who knew that defeating the Dark Lord could be so simple? Drabble.

A mild send-up on a popular genre of Harry Potter fanfiction. As much as I enjoy them, some practical considerations come to mind. Inevitably, Harry has one specific ally in all those fics ... but what if that entity took a different view on things?

Harry letting himself get hit by Voldemort's killing curse had slightly different results in this particular AU!

A collection of funny jokes and stories, old and new, told with a Harry Potter twist. WARNING: entries may be bad, mad, rude, crude, insulting, amusing or hilarious, resulting in groans, grins, giggles or full blown laughter depending on your own tastes, though there should be something for most. Probably should not be read by those under 15. Read at your own peril! Short Oneshots!

What happens if Harry was raised differently. This story has OOC characters and loads of laughs. Longer preview inside. It is hinted that Cedric and Harry will be a couple, but as Harry is only 11-12 in the story, NOTHING comes about it.

Oneshot from Ron’s POV. Ron tries to explain to the twins just how Harry made the Ministry of Magic make a new classification for magical creatures, and why the puffskeins were now considered the scariest magical creature of all time. No pairings.

Or, "The Satisfying Deaths of "Professor" Umbridge. WARNING: Umbridge death and dismemberment, crazy yet eloquent humor, and a dose of H/Hr!

Much to his displeasure, Harry is thrown back through time into his six year old body. As a result, Harry decides to contort the timeline, purely for his own amusement.

Voldemort is having a bad day. A very bad day.

Aragog explains a problem to Harry and Hermione.

Professor Sinistra has to explain a situation to the Deputy Headmistress. 'Tis a silly fic.

Harry was feeling pretty good after his third year. True, it hasn't been going perfectly, but nothing ever does. Still, his godfather was free-ish and alive, and both their souls were where they belong. And then he got a visit from his mother's mother. There's no ownership by me involved with this.

It was an average day in the Gryffindor common room essays to write, tests to study for and juicy gossip to exchange. Then all Hell broke loose and started trying to eat the students...