Tony Stark buys things, expensive things. Sometimes he buys things he shouldn't. Sometimes he thinks he has a really good reason, and sometimes it all just kind of blows up in his face. Especially when the things he buys come with an NC-17 rating. Part of the Series: Coulson Lives, but the Avengers might be the death of him.

Loki loves making life difficult for Tony Stark and the rest of the Avengers. While debriefing with Director Fury after their most recent mission, the lights go out, but when they turn back on, the group is surprised to see a box with a DVD labeled 'IRON MAN.' The team comes to realize they can't leave until they watch the movie. Tony is not happy. Characters belong to Marvel.

Written for Avengerkink prompt. Tony's secretly a mutant.

Tony Stark has borne many titles in his life. The Merchant of Death. Billionaire. Playboy. Genius. Hero. Many believe that his title of Iron Man will be the one he takes to the grave. But Tony knows better. For Tony bore another name, one that struck terror into all that heard it. Sah Sunvaar. Phantom Hunter. The Fox. An Assassin of the highest caliber.

When you were trained as an assassin at a tender young age, those skills tend to follow you for life. It was easy to kill a fly in midair with a butter knife without looking, imagine fifty seven ways to kill a man or pick a lock. So breaking out a terrorists' jail is as easy as pie for Tony. It's fun to mess with his teammates too. "So why are you naked?" R&R

Tony's parents are killed by assassins when he is four. He is then taken in by the order until he is 21. He then leaves to take over Stark Industries. Then the Avengers come to live with him in the tower. Will he be able to keep his secret from them? Assassin!Tony AU. Set after The Avengers and before Iron Man 3, Thor: The Dark World and Captain America: The Winter Soldier.

"You asked what would happen in war against him?" Fury asked, leaning back with a frown before narrowing his eye on Steve, "Stark has contacts, money, brains, people working for him, and is as impossible to get rid of as a wart-" He sighed, a slight twitch of the lips showing a grim smile. "Captain- if we were ever against Stark, there wouldn't be a fight- we'd be dead already."

Challenge: What would it be like if Tony was the 'adoptive uncle' of all ambassadors while he was all snarky with their parents? The Avengers never would have beleived it if they hadn't seen the squeeling Russian girl with the biggest dimples and her glaring daddy.

Challenge: Trust, the belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of. Rather hard to do that, since the last person you trusted happened to rip out you heart- a rather comical cylinder mechanical heart, but Tony Stark wasn't asking for anything extravagant.

Challenge: Being an AI did not mean that one was without inependent thought, nor action. Jarvis was an independent being, albit a slightly protective one. "Hello SHIELD. This is Jarvis. If any of you threaten, hurt or attempt to hack Mr. Tony Stark, I will be forced to take steps for the removal of your existence. Have a good day." "

Challenge: Sequal to 'Agnising' (don't have to read; The Avengers find another document sitting on a coffee table...they can't resist. The Avengers read 'Textbook'

Oneshot: IRON MAN 3 SPOILERS: "You're living, you're not…not-" "Fixed?" "Is that what this is about? You just…gave up? We could have gotten you help! We could have hel-"But Pepper, I am helped! it's fixed, it's perfect I-""You think it's fixed? You think that you were a mistake?""Well, I-" "No Tony, you were perfect before this-"

Oneshot: The Norns control your entire life. They control who you will see, who you will meet, and who you will fight. When something slowly poisons one of their favorite creature's to weave a life for, they're mad. And who do they call to retrieve the infected creature? The Avenger's weren't sure which was harder, dealing with the Norns, or dealing with Loki.

Challenge: Tony Stark was witty and sharp. Iron Man was cocky and slightly intimidating, he had another face, and one that he didn't dare let the normal eye see. "You really want to play this game, General Ross? I'll tell you, as the Merchant of Death, I rarely lose."

Challenge: Secretly, all of Tony's kitchen appliences are AI's, they're just a little scared of the other Avengers. But the moment Tony enters the room...'WHAT ARE YOU DOING'

The Arc Reactor did so much more then what everyone had realized. Or maybe they never thought to question how a metal cylinder could exist inside the sternum of a human being without causing any lasting damage.

Challenge: When Tony was 20, he sang a little. He wasn't too good, just enough so he could get a record with Sting...thank god nobody ever found that awkward album...Songs are originally published by Robert Downey Jr. and Sting. Swears twice.

Challenge:Trying to move into the Avenger's tower was difficult, mostly because of the rooms. They had seen a mechanical kitchen, a closet- garage, a pollo court, a spa even, but a lab? No. The idea that a lab even existed was preposterous, almost silly. Where else would Stark make all of his inventions-was that a robot? What kind of name is Dummy? A Fire Extinguisher? What?

Challenge: A Fitness Exam...Tony Stark didn't do Fitness Exams. Tony wasn't weak, Tony lifted a 45 LBS Pipe Wrench with his left hand while he was DYING...Tony just didn't show off, that's different then being weak.

Challenge; Tony didn't hate Bangladesh, he just liked knowing every possibility, ever variable about everything, every risk he was taking. Going to Bangladesh? That wasn't calculated. Nor was what he was going to do if they found him again..."Are you ready to accept death, Tony Stark?" Raza hummed, "I'm ready to accept the vision of your corpse on the ground."

Challenge: Captured and supposed to make a missile? Escape with a metal suit. Face Loki in his own house? 'Jump out the window' Kidnapped by Hammer and forced to build him an AI? Things are just getting too easy...

Challenge: "So…somebody read Tony's mind and wrote down what he was thinking of?" "God I hope not- I don't want to know what runs through his head." Avengers read the fanfic- Spectacular Ignorance.

Challenge: "It's not general knowledge! I prefer it that way!" "For god's sake- what is?" "The fact Stark's 24 years old." Tony Stark accomplished alot in his life. Not to mention, how short it's actually been. Slight Swearing.

Slight swearing, Challenge: "I- I'm not that good with disorders…but chaos in your lab. The missed meetings and the odd irrelevant statements…Tony, do you have ADD?" "It doesn't mean that you're wrong. You aren't a freak because of an impairment, Tony"

A normal day in the Avenger's mansion, excepting the fact that security has gotten somewhat...locked. Tony trapped in the basement unknowingly, while we're all up here, sitting on couches watching a movie that appeared out of literally nowhere- wait, why is Tony in a cave? When did this get on film?- Avengers minus Tony watch IRON MAN