A/N:Hey everyone, so I honestly tried to make this a bit of an angsty chapter that was a bit different from what i normally write. However, somewhere along the way i geuss i lost that plan because there is almost zero angst in this whole chapter. anyway, I do hope you guys like it, this is my first chapter that is written that revovles entirely around Sirius and Remus. i am hoping to do a christmas at Grimmauld place chapter that actually aligns with christmas so, hopefully my schedule goes right. Thanks so much to all of my readers and as always favorites and reviews are appreciated (each time I read a review from you guys it is amazing, a part of me still doesn't really believe anyone would like the things I write)
Remus, Sirius, and Molly apparated back to Grimmauld Place immediately after the Hogwarts Express was out of sight. Molly spent the rest of the morning packing up her family's things. With all the children gone there was no reason for her to stay at headquarters full time.
She flooed back to the burrow at around noon, leaving Sirius and Remus completely alone for the first time in months. They had a lazy afternoon enjoying each other's company. Late in the afternoon they used what was left of the food to make a small dinner for themselves.
"It's too quiet without Harry and the others." Sirius said as they sat opposite each other at the large dining table.
Remus nodded. "Grimmauld is just too big and cold. Maybe we should go back to the cottage for the summer. It's not like someone has to be here at all times."
Sirius smiled and nodded. "And it would be nice to be back in our own home instead of in this prison." He said with disgust as he said the last word.
"So, it's settled then, we'll pack tomorrow and be home in time for dinner."
As they cleaned up the kitchen, Sirius felt the happiest he'd ever felt in all the years he'd lived in this house combined. They were going home tomorrow. Leaving this horrid house that had never really been a home.
They were cuddled together on the couch in front of the fire in the living room of Grimmauld Place. The flames crackled as Remus read and Sirius traced the scars on his forearm. Music from Sirius' muggle records floated around them. Sirius was about to fall asleep when there was a knock on the window.
He got up from his comfy spot to let in a small, tawny owl in. The owl dropped a letter with a Hogwarts seal on the coffee table and flew back out. The letter was addressed to Remus.
He opened the envelope and quickly read through the letter. "So, what does Dumbledore want now?" Sirius asked after a few seconds.
"I think he has another mission for me. He says he suggests I take a trip up north to meet with some 'acquaintances'."
Sirius looked up at him with a horrified expression. "He can't possibly mean …?"
Remus nodded. "I think he does."
"what does he expect you to do, walk up to the nearest pack of werewolves and ask them very politely to join the Order?" Sirius said, his voice slowly rising. "They'll eat you alive." Sirius paused and thought for a second. He turned back to Remus with a worried look. "You are going to tell him 'no', right?"
Remus shook his head. "If I can do something to help the Order why wouldn't I do it? Besides …" he paused and looked away sheepishly. "You know I can't say no to Dumbledore."
"I'd of thought that after thirteen years you'd have learned to." Sirius said, sounding slightly annoyed.
"You of all people know how much I owe to him." Remus said, sounding just as annoyed.
"You don't owe him anything!" Sirius shouted angrily. "And even if you did, how could you even think of saying yes to something so dangerous? It's practically a suicide mission!"
"I've been on plenty of dangerous missions for the Order. You just don't want me to leave because then you'll be alone again. It's not even your decision, Sirius, it's mine!" Remus yelled back.
"So, all of a sudden my opinion doesn't matter to you?!"
"I've been making my own decisions without your opinion for thirteen years, so, no, I don't think I need now!" Remus shouted as he stormed out of the room.
Sirius started to go after him but stopped once he heard the heavy front door slam shut.
Remus spent the night walking around muggle London. He had originally intended on going to the cottage but had decided he didn't want to be somewhere filled with so many happy memories while he cooled down.
When he finally wandered back to Grimmauld place, the sun was just starting to rise. He opened and closed the front door with incredible care so as to not alert Sirius to his arrival.
"Remus?" A groggy voice called out in the next room.
Too late, Remus thought as walked into the living room. The sight was almost enough to make him laugh if it hadn't also made him want to cry. Sirius' hair in a tangled mess as he stumbled to stand up from the armchair he had been in. He had obviously sat there all night waiting for him to come back.
"Morning." Remus greeted him timidly. Before he could get up the courage to apologize, Sirius was crossing the room and enveloping him in a bone crushing hug.
"I'm so, so sorry for what I said."
Remus laughed. "Why are you sorry? I'm the one that should be sorry."
Sirius released him and looked at him confusedly. "No. I shouldn't have said what I did. I know how much you like to be helpful whenever you can."
Remus smiled. "No, Padfoot, I was stupid and selfish. Of course your opinion matters to me. And … if you don't want me to go, I won't. it's not fair of me to leave you alone when we've had far too many years apart."
Sirius looked up at him with caring eyes. "it's not that I don't want to be alone. I'm not some lovesick puppy who stares at the door until you come back to me, you know." They both laughed at the image. "It's not, I just … I don't know if it's because of my family or … or Azkaban, but … sometimes, when you leave … like last night … a small part of me worries that … you won't come back." Sirius turned away ashamedly.
"Oh, Padfoot." Remus said softly as he grabbed Sirius by the chin and pulled him back to face him. He stared into Sirius' eyes lovingly for a second before pulling him into another bone-crushing hug. "You know I would never leave you forever. At least, not by choice."
Once they both calmed down, they went upstairs to take a nap, seeing as neither one of them had slept well the night before.
Remus woke up some time around noon based on how bright their room was. Sirius was wrapped around him like he was a giant teddy bear. He rubbed the sleep out of his eyes and was surprised by a kiss on his cheek. "Good morning." He said, laughing as he spoke. "I thought you were still asleep."
Sirius smiled up at him. "No, I've been up for about half an hour." He paused and took a breath like he was nervous about what he was going to say next. "I think you should go. On the mission, I mean."
Remus looked down at him surprisedly. "But … after last night … how could I possibly leave you after that?"
"I'll be fine. Besides, if Dumbledore asked it must be important. I'll be fine. Just … promise me you'll be careful?"
Remus thought for a second, deciding whether or not he should go. After a second he nodded. "Of course I will." He said and he kissed him lovingly on the mouth.
They had one last lazy day, pretending one of them wasn't leaving in a couple of days. The next day Remus spent packing. They said their goodbyes a day later and then Remus flooed to Hogwarts to find out exactly where he would be going.
They talked and decided that that it would be best if Sirius stayed at Grimmauld place. The security was better and, with Order meetings happening somewhat regularly, Sirius wouldn't be as alone as he would be at the cottage.
Three days after Remus had left, Sirius was sitting in the living room, drowning his sorrows in a bottle of firewhiskey. All of a sudden, the fire flared green and out walked a figure. Sirius fumbled for his wand for a second before giving up when he realized it was only Molly Weasley.
"Hello Molly." He said with the small amount of politeness he could manage.
She took one look at him as she dusted the ash off of her clothes. "Really, Sirius, two days alone and you've already turned to alcohol? Pathetic."
"Why are you even here, Molly?" He asked, lacking all of his usual charm.
"I seemed to have misplaced my knitting and was hoping maybe I had left it here."
"Well, I haven't seen it, but you're welcome to look."
She left the room and returned with a big bag five minutes later. "Just as I thought, left it in the pantry."
Curiosity got the better of him and, just as she walked over to the fireplace, Sirius spoke. "Why was it in the pantry?"
"Molly looked confused for a second then smiled. "This is my Christmas knitting. Don't want anyone seeing their presents now, do I ?"
"But, Harry said you give them the same thing every year. What does it matter if the see it?" Sirius said, drunkenly forgetting his manners.
Molly didn't seem to care. She laughed. "I guess I just like to believe they still get surprised. The fun of Christmas and all."
Sirius nodded even though he still didn't understand. "But, why do you make them the same thing every year? I mean I get the homemade gifts but, why not something other than a sweater? Like a hat or a blanket."
Molly though for a second before nodding and sitting down. "I assume you noticed how all of my children seem to be drawn to dangerous activities?" Sirius nodded. "Well, seeing as I can't lock them in their rooms and keep them safe at home with me, I do what I can to keep them safe. I make them sweaters to make sure they are warm, and they know they are loved. I like to think of a sweater as me giving them a hug, no matter how far away they are."
Sirius nodded understandingly. He thought for a second about how far away his family was from him right now and he made a decision. "Could … could you teach me?" he asked nervously.
Molly stared at him with wide eyes, speechless. She stared for a solid minute. Just as Sirius was about to ask if she was okay, she spoke. "Alright." She waved her wand and transfigured the empty bottle of firewhiskey into a pair of needles. She then pulled a ball of maroon yarn out of her bag and handed both to Sirius.
"But, if I'm going to teach you to do this, you have to promise me you're going to take it seriously. No complaining it's too hard, no quitting, and most importantly, no more drinking your problems away."
Sirius picked up the needles and nodded.