Review Time:
Mike AZ 2 - Well considering SS is not viewed so favorably, perhaps I can at least make it more interesting.
She Who is Woe - Thanks! Although I must emphasize I didn't come up with the format myself.
Guest - Honestly that sounds up my alley, Byleth punishing *everyone*.
equach - It's interesting you mention these things. And the answer is...some memes are just *too* obvious to do so early. I lament not sneaking in Claude being upside down, and Petra technically had the Hoes Mad thing, but I feel some things people are expecting? Doesn't mean I can't do them, just use them at the perfect time. I can't not use Dimitri's famous line, after all.
In these times of war, we are fortunate enough to have Professor Byleth back with us. We'll need her support to fend off the Empire and find Lady Rhea, so everyone must give it their all!
-Seteth
Alois - I am glad your family understands and supports your decision to keep fighting. Although my relief is…..tempered at the fact that you have a new book of jokes to tell….sigh, I don't know. Why did the chicken cross the road?
Anna - Pallardo shall not terrorize the grounds anymore, but this does not mean you assume control over his wares. This stuff goes back to the monastery! "Finders Keepers" is not universal law and you know it!
Annette - I am sorry your father is currently out there in the throes of battle, maybe we can…..oh, you're more upset at Bernadetta and Lysithea outgrowing you. Of course you are.
Bernadetta - You're coming out of your room more? Very nice. You're Bernie Bear, I understa-…..nice try. It is actually a myth that bears hibernate completely for the entire winter. Get back here, you do not need that much sleep.
Byleth - Are you sure you've been asleep for five years? I am your ally, Professor. You may be honest with me. Hold nothing back. ….so a holy figure named Sothis has existed in your head for all this time and she has allowed you to rewind time (with restrictions) albeit her memory was lacking. Now she has fused with you. So all this time, Lady Rhea…..forgive me. It is something that she must tell you, lest she never speak to me again. But what I will tell you, about myself….let us speak privately. ….wait, who followed you here?
Caspar - Please stop showing off your muscles. Yes I have seen bigger ones, Raphael is right over there.
Catherine - Your service is appreciated, and I will honor whatever request you have. …..that is something Shamir needs to sign off on too. No, I'm fairly certain Lady Rhea won't "get jealous". Did you miss the whole period of her fawning over Byleth, or…?
Cyril - I understand you wish to demonstrate the skills Shamir has passed off to you. Stop wasting apples by trying to shoot them while placed on someone's head, my own included!
Dorothea - It is not my fault everyone keeps wondering what you did with the hat. It was distinct. Can you procure another one? Oh come now, surely not only one of this hat exists in Fodlan!
Felix - One would think you can utter a more cooperative sentiment than "Professor, let's kill the boar together". There is still hope for Prince Dimitri. Byleth will not give up on him so easily. ….fine, you can have the head if it comes to that. Good heavens, man.
Ferdinand - The Water Noble was you. No, I was not tipped off by the amount of clues he scattered across the years, it never caught on because no one was fooled at all. I think we're all just tired of these kinds of disguises.
Flayn - We will recover Lady Rhea. Now Flayn, while I'm going to talk to the Professor, you can….what do you mean you told her your secret?!
Hanneman - Be grateful nothing of yours was lost forever. It is not reason to be so disappointed and lament the "younger generation's lower attention span". Thieves want gold and treasure, not research notes. It's gold to you and you alone, Hanneman.
Hilda - This monastery is not in charge of brushing your hair 1000 times before the next battle. Whining and stomping your foot will not change my mind and you know it. Split ends are the last thing you need to worry about!
Ingrid - You are asking the wrong person if you need a way to dispel those rumors you've gotten for putting off your father's marriage request all these years. I say ignore them. Or you can ask Manuela for some disastrous plan, sure.
Kronya - So to understand it correctly, Byleth prevented your demise before Solon could finish you off. But because her wrath was terrifying, you got on your knees and begged for mercy. And in the end, you're now this gleeful pet for her whims that returned after all this time. She only spared you to make sure your superiors pay dearly for their role in Jeralt's death. Tch. A prisoner of war is a prisoner of war, but remember….you have enemies in these halls.
Leonie - Fine, you are in charge of watching over Kronya when Byleth or myself cannot. When we are not in battle, she is to stay chained up in that cellar. You….stop! How can we get information from her when you're whipping her that viciously?!
Linhardt - I do not know what you mean that "Flayn's secret was obvious", but I do suggest you shut your mouth before Byleth makes you pull weeds every day for the rest of your life.
Lysithea - Stop flaunting the height increase you received. Yes I know you are now 20 years of age, but many will still see you as that little girl scared of ghosts. So it is very inappropriate to eagerly tell every male that you're wearing a bra now.
Manuela - Good to see that you are well. Five years hasn't done a thing to your looks, it seems. Sigh, do not look so sad. If you insist we can have a cup of tea one of these days, as friends. Stop winking. No, as friends. Blowing the kiss is not necessary, I assure you.
Marianne - You really do not need my permission if you want to ma…..oh, I'm sorry that your adoptive father hasn't been so receptive to your feelings. I cannot control your future, but for now, your home can be here.
Mercedes - I am pleased to see time has not dulled your devotion to the church. Although you really need to learn how to say no when people ask, even if it's nicely. Do you know how long brushing Hilda's hair takes?
Petra - Now you need to marry someone to secure your future as Briggid's Queen? This is getting ridiculous. I am a little taken aback by the ease of the way you said "a harem is encouraged".
Raphael - Yes yes, I know, the staff will get rid of the restraining order if…huh. You're right. Ignatz never joined the Professor's class. So he must be with Claude. Dear Goddess, he's going to die out there.
Shamir - Good to see that your focus is still on getting the job done. "I'd marry Catherine if she can just shut up about it". Well at least we both know it won't happen.
Sylvain - You? You spread those rumors about Ingrid? Boredom and a desire for fun is quite the lethal combination on you. I suggest you help her stop them. I think it's pretty obvious why she wouldn't choose Felix or you.
To be continued...
Coming back with a bang. I know Kronya's done bad things (trust me, Leonie is there to torment her), but for her role and unique design, the game used her very poorly. I wanna see if I can extend this to other characters shortchanged. We'll certainly see Jertiza again, that's for sure. Hope this isn't too controversial!
Oh and like the game itself Ashe and Lorenz will just be re-recruited.