-Rudolph.-
-No, I'm serious, that's how you say it. It's an old name, you're lucky I know it at all.-
-You want more? Whoever it was had something to do with navigation. Really, the most fascinating thing is that we know the name at all. It's startling what tiny details slip through the cracks in time, remembered even thousands of years later for no discernible reason. It really makes history feel like a living thing.-
-Wait, hear me out. Take this gift-giving thing, for example. It wasn't a tradition while I was alive, at least not as far as I can remember. I admit that's not much, but think of it this way: I have libraries' worth of historical data and almost nothing on the tradition of giving gifts at Earth's winter solstice. It's actually the Lotus herself who claims the tradition comes from her parents' time, and wasn't really practiced when they left the Empire behind, either. Isn't that…-
-I'm trying to be excited here, please stop snoring.-
-Miss Tana would be interested.-
-Of course she's biased. In her defense, you kidnapped her the first time. Again. Kidnapped her again. Let's start that story, shall we?-
So we go back to the first Tennobaum. Well, the third, but the first for Doan and Secret. It was… sudden.
-That's sudden.-
-Other people don't… no, let me explain it and we'll let the masses be the judge.-
Doan was preparing for another raid. This was early in the days of the War on Lua, less than a month after Doan arrived on the moon. The number of raids going on and accidents that were happening to anyone near the Tenno's perimeters was high. Which was why, when Secret landed his Liset beside the building she was in, she was a little surprised.
On a normal day, that would have been a ridiculous thing to do. On a normal day, the grey of the Liset would have been rather visible. On a normal day, Secret's Liset wouldn't have been coloured bright red and green.
Of all the miracles that have ever occurred throughout history, let me not exaggerate the nature of this: on that day and every subsequent Tennobaum, not a single lander craft coloured in this manner has ever been noticed. We do not know why. Other colours do not have the same effect. The same colours on other days do not have the same effect. Nothing about this makes sense.
-Well, if they noticed it, why didn't they shoot it?-
-What do you mean, "they shot at one once"?-
-Yes, "once," you said that already. What's that supposed to mean?-
Well, nonsense aside, Secret landed. Across the base, another Liset landed in the same colours, but Ind's adventure with Silence isn't our subject in this recording. Suffice to say, the woman hasn't the wit to be confused.
Doan, on the other hand, was completely baffled when Secret dropped out of his lander and knocked on the door.
She looked around, opened the door slightly, and peeked out. With the required whisper, she asked, "Secret?"
Secret nodded, put a finger up to his faceplate, and beckoned for Doan to come.
Doan protested. Obviously she did. They were busy, the Grineer and Tenno both. The entire war hinged on the things they managed to accomplish in those early months on Lua. She got a few words in before Secret waved his hand and beckoned again, at which point Doan decided it was best not to argue with an insistent Tenno. She started to follow him, only for him to turn and gesture to her Gorgon rifle, telling her to leave it.
In Secret's defense, it was a special occasion. He doesn't normally tell others what to do with their weapons, I promise. Grineer and Tenno have very different ideas about them, in any case. Except for a bit of protesting, mostly over how insane it was to leave behind her weapon at all, Doan didn't mind. After all, having a gun doesn't make much difference around a Tenno. Especially a Loki.
So Doan went with. Got in the Liset, cramped as usual, and flew off to somewhere completely unknown with an enemy soldier she couldn't talk to.
Doan's life must be very stressful.
What was I doing? Funny you should ask, hypothetical listener. Have you ever heard of the "Traveling Salesman Problem"? (Note: add quotation marks to transcript.) It's what's known as an NP problem, and suffice to say two things: those are hard, and they are not part of my job description! So what does the Lotus get me and every other Cephalon in the entire Origin System to do every single Tennobaum? We get to spend 24 hours and relativistic change computing the most efficient routes for our Tenno to travel!
-I'm not bitter. I'm a historian. Why wouldn't I spend every year on the day of the recreation of an ancient tradition plugging away at numbers instead of, let's suggest something wild here, recording the events?-
So, as Secret and Doan have related to me in the years since, because I wasn't there, they made their way to Earth and landed at a town called Dramish, right in the middle of the town square.
This time it made more sense they weren't shot at, because Dramish is a peaceful town unless one is particularly pained by bad jokes. Not the sort of place Tenno usually visit and not the sort of place with much in the way of defenses. A couple of the adults coming out of their homes had hunting rifles and several of the children had toy guns, but nothing that could really hurt anyone.
So they understandably panicked a little when Doan dropped out of the Liset.
They probably panicked a little less because she fell flat on her face into the snow.
Lisets are very cramped.
A moment later, Secret dropped out and helped her to her feet. He waved to the townsfolk, who took the whole thing rather well. After all, the Tenno had arrived twice before, always in landers with the same colours. So instead of running away, they just watched quietly. One boy waved back.
The pair of them looked out at the crowd. The crowd stared back. If it hadn't been for the fact that Secret and Doan were completely unarmed... except for Doan's Sonicor and their combined prodigious strength and combat knowledge and complete imperviousness to any caliber of weapon in the town… but completely unarmed other than that, there probably would have been some problems.
-I don't make you sound dangerous. You make you sound dangerous.-
Secret took a few steps back towards his Liset, put his hand into the cargo compartment, and pulled out a brightly-coloured paper package.
A fair warning to non-Tenno, don't try that. Ever. The Liset does not actually have enough space for cargo and the Void pocket they use to store everything isn't always stable. It also doesn't work for non-Tenno, anyway. Any accusations of Tenno ships "eating" people are exaggerated, preposterous, and also their own fault.
Anyway, he handed the package to Doan, who was mystified by it. After a moment of her staring at it and looking up at him, he gestured to the crowd, then pointed specifically at the boy who'd waved.
"For him?" Doan clarified.
Secret nodded.
Doan turned to look at the crowd, who almost all flinched. One of the armed adults raised his rifle and a few children hid behind their parents.
"They're afraid of me."
Secret pulled another package from the Liset and put a hand on Doan's shoulder to gently pull her towards the people of the town. Everyone waited until they both reached the first boy, and Secret beckoned to a young woman nearby. Doan, unsure what to do, knelt down. It still left her head and shoulders taller than the boy she held her gift out to.
"For me?" the boy asked. Doan nodded. The woman, walking slowly up to Secret, looked first to the boy, then to the Tenno. Secret, too, held out his gift.
Boy and woman took their little packages.
"You're a friend of the Tenno?" The boy was awed, of course, but confused. After all, Doan was a Grineer.
Doan, of course, couldn't answer. It was much too blunt a question. So she looked to Secret.
Secret nodded, then raised one finger to his faceplate.
Doan nodded back. "Secret," she said to the boy.
The boy nodded back, very enthusiastically, and Secret looked around the crowd before pointing the young woman.
"Y-yes, Tenno?" the woman asked.
Secret pantomimed sleeping, resting his head on his hands, and pointed around.
"He says you should be asleep." Secret crossed his arms and Doan added, "and he's not very happy you aren't."
"We have a feast!" said the boy, taking Doan's hand and pointing to the biggest building in the town. "We were celebrating. We thought it would be okay?"
"If it isn't," an old man said, "we could-"
Secret held up his hands, trying to calm their worries. When the crowd flinched, again, Doan translated.
"It is alright." She watched another series of gestures, then shook her head. "I don't know what that means."
Secret shook his head, then made a motion pushing the others away towards the building.
"He wants you to go… me, too? But I'm a Grineer…"
Doan's exact meaning was obvious, even if it would have taken too long to explain. Her people were monsters to these innocents, always one fit of whimsy away from conquering them and their planet. It didn't help that a lot of the people in the crowd were still watching her and there was a gap of several meters between her and anyone but the boy who'd taken her hand.
Still, Doan tells me that wasn't what she noticed. It was the boy who caught her attention.
-I don't blame you. I didn't understand at first, either. But Doan mentioned something I'd never thought of before...-
-Because I like dramatic pauses.-
-Okay, okay! … Doan had never touched an unarmoured hand before. Even with you and Silence and Ind, she'd never actually held somebody's hand before then.-
So the boy held Doan's hand, which must have been very cold metal, and pulled her along until they followed the people into the town hall.
It was beautiful. Doan had to stop partway through the doors. She nearly hit her head when she craned her neck to look around.
The outside of the building had been welded metal strong enough to survive any weather or natural attack. The inside was wood. Actual wood. The villagers had managed to chop down a tree at some point and kill it, and the walls of the town hall were a beautiful smooth brown of stacked logs. Four stonework fireplaces were set along those walls, but they alone didn't bring the place to life. That, the villagers had done with entirely different works.
In the rafters were more plants, leaves and flowers and vines brought in from greenhouses for the occasion. Glass shards of red and green hung from the ceiling on strings and glittered in the firelight, casting little beams that danced across the room and sometimes shone into the eyes.
Then there was the table. Lined with benches and covered with food, it was big enough to seat every one of more than two hundred people around it, with room to grow.
"Happy Tennobaum, Grineer lady!" the boy said.
That managed to startle Doan out of her reverie, though she didn't really stop staring as she followed the boy to the table. It was, after all, the most colourful place she'd ever seen. It took a moment to convince Doan to sit, especially after the ominous creaking as she put her weight on the bench.
"What's your name? Do you have names? It's not a number, is it? How did you meet the Tenno? Does he have a name?"
Doan blinked down at the boy. Nobody else was sitting very near her, but this child was practically attached and completely fearless.
"My name is Doan Tana," she said slowly, trying to speak as clearly as possible for the boy who wasn't used to the usual Grineer dialect and way of slurring. "The Tenno's name is Secret."
"Oh. That makes sense," the boy said, nodding in complete confidence and misunderstanding. "They probably only tell friends their names. Mine's Keray"
Doan would probably have corrected Keray, but her attention was caught by Secret sneaking into the room. Invisible, obviously, since he couldn't have moved anywhere in that town except with stunned silence or raucous cheers following him while visible. He noticed her, too, and noticed how people were avoiding her, so he walked over and appeared beside her.
It startled a few people. Secret ignored them. Sort of. He pretended to ignore them and showed off.
-You understand that immortal empires have fallen to those powers?-
Or, according to him, he simply used some of the most powerful and least understood abilities in all of history to serve food to his friend. Because he could. With a few well-placed decoys and at least one missed teleport that ended with a young man sitting on thin air, Secret gathered up various articles of food from around the table and delivered a filled plate to Doan. He placed it in front of her, steaming hot, with one hand on her shoulder.
Then, as far as anyone other than Doan was concerned, he disappeared. Even Doan had some trouble figuring out where he went, since she was used to guessing his position on the battlefield, not in a feast hall.
For a few seconds, Doan sat there, along with everyone else, unable to do anything but wonder what she was supposed to do now.
The children solved the problem. With a resounding chorus of excitement, they scrambled from their seats and dashed around the table to crowd Doan and her little friend, shouting and describing in vivid detail how amazing Secret had been. This actually worked out well for Doan, not just because the children ended up pushing away most of the more wary adults, but also because Doan had plenty of stories to tell about just how amazing the Tenno were.
From then on, there were few complications aside from Doan's amazement at the food, which was, suffice to say, anything but Grineer synthesized rations. Even taking off her faceplate only resulted in a few children poking her cheeks to see if she was real.
-You could have at least taken pictures or something. I've never seen Doan laugh without her faceplate on.-
-I can't just ask her that. It wouldn't be polite.-
-Now you're just taunting me.-
Other topics of conversation included what it was like to live on the moon, the fact that Doan's scarf was given to her by Secret, and the problems that came with commanding the average Grineer.
As much fun as Doan was having, they were on a schedule, and eventually Secret reappeared and beckoned her away, much to the dismay of the assembled children. Fortunately, the children were sufficiently distracted when they discovered the gifts that had been left under their chairs during the night.
-You could have left them at their homes instead of showing off, you know.-
-Invasion of privacy? You practice spying and espionage daily. They weren't even home.-
-Maybe if I had a bed, I'd understand.-
Just like that, Doan and Secret left. There are quite a few small settlements on Earth, usually in the more barren areas. For most of Tennobaum, the pair of them followed the night, delivering presents to the sleeping towns. Other towns had started Dramish's tradition of a nightly feast, but none of those were on Secret and Doan's route. By the end, they'd just finished delivering presents to a mining colony on Saturn, and Doan was exhausted.
When she next got off the Liset, it was stepping out onto my Orbiter to see Silence and Ind. Belyri was visiting, too, filling the Orbiter with twinkling music. I'd put my own efforts into manufacturing decorations that I'm afraid didn't come close to the plants and glass in that town hall, though I didn't know it at the time.
Doan was kind enough not to mention it, and insists she thought it was enchanting.
It is a little suspicious that I'm the one who taught her that word, but it was very nice to hear.
"Miss Tana," I said first, "you must be tired. We thought you could rest here, but first, Secret and Silence wanted a chance to see you both."
And they were both thrilled. For all that there was still a war going on and they'd been twenty-four hours away from it, I can say that they made a good choice. That night with their friends made all the difference later.
It was a short visit. Ind and Doan really were exhausted after so long awake and working, and of course neither Silence nor Secret could talk, so they sat down and we Cephalons and Grineer exchanged a few pleasantries before the Tenno went to get two packages.
Secret presented one to Doan, Silence, one for Ind. From the Tenno. Just like all the gifts for all the people of Origin we could find. These ones, though, were chosen by us.
Though I do admit I was overruled on Ind's gift. Given the results, I can't argue.
"For us?" Doan asked, a little disbelieving.
"For us!" Ind cheered, giggling in delight. She let Silence put the first gift in her hands, waited until she was given permission, then tore it open.
Inside was a modified green-and-brown Dera plasma rifle. Yes, I argued against it. Yes, later statistics proved I was very, very wrong in my stance.
For a moment, Ind was concerned. "No big gun?"
Doan looked from the Tenno to the gun and swooped in to clear things up.
"Both guns, Ind. Both. Big gun for shields. Little gun for after. Both."
"Both?" Ind whispered. I have the recording. It truly sounds like an entire world of possibilities opened up for her that day. Then, just as before, she cheered. "Both! Both guns!"
She took her gun and tried to clip it to her back, though it was a little harder than it should have been because she was busy jumping up and down with joy.
Doan turned to Secret, anxious. "But… we didn't-"
Secret held out his package. Doan reached out and, slowly, took it and unwrapped it.
It was a faceplate, one that a lot of work went into. A lot of work, not because the parts were difficult to make work, but because nothing like it had ever been made.
"Should I put it on now?" she asked.
All three other individuals on the Orbiter capable of nodding did so. Vigorously. I may have offered mild and suitably understated verbal encouragement.
So, naturally, she took off one faceplate and put on the new one.
The faceplate had two functions, one subtle from the inside, the other subtle from the outside, and neither visible otherwise. Doan noticed the latter a moment before we all saw the latter.
Doan looked around the orbiter for a second before stopping to stare at Secret. "By the Queens…" she whispered, eyes wide.
We could see that. From the outside, her faceplate's eyes mimicked her facial expression slightly, just enough to get a little better idea what she was thinking.
Doan, for her part, was seeing for the first time, again. The lenses in the faceplate weren't perfect. Doan's eyesight isn't a matter of her vision, it's a flaw in the way her mind interprets data. Still, when Belyri came to me with the idea that we might make it a little easier for Doan to see, we put everything we could into it.
It worked. It wasn't perfect, but it worked. Doan got to see just a little better that day.
She was sniffling when she said, "but… I didn't bring anything for you…"
Ind solved that. She held out her arms wide, scooped up Doan and Silence, took a step towards Secret, and pulled them all into a hug.
I don't remember much of the old traditions, but I think that was what the Lotus always hoped they would be about, when she brought them back to the Origin System.
Author's Notes
This is exactly what it looks like, a classic silly but oddly sincere chapter of Doan Tana. As with many of them, it started as a bit of a joke, though at least the concept was more fleshed out than most. Some chapters start with exactly one joke and have to grow from there. Considering my schedule this Christmas, it's a bit of a miracle it got posted. Thank a friend of mine, an artist who sometimes sketches random ideas I throw by him. After I asked him for a sketch of Doan in a Santa hat, he decided it would be better to give her a sleigh and make Vay Hek her reindeer. It's as insane as it sounds, and the effort and imagination ensured I worked hard to get this finished.
Just making sure any fans of this story know that they owe it to a man who goes by Icario, and if he ever gets a social media presence of some kind, I'll be directing you there immediately.