'Time flies,' commented Wilhelm, gazing intently at the crossed-out days on the calendar. 'Back when I was waiting, it had felt as if time was crawling. Now… I'm not sure what to think.'
His eyes lowered to the half-written paper on the table. It was a letter he'd been intending to send out the next day. And never had he felt so awkward writing about a recount of his days before. Or resigned. As if this could be the final memento of his pitiful existence. Something that only one person would treasure, and even then it would be the object subjected to the cursings of the entire alien world.
Including that one who saw its value.
His grip on his pen involuntarily tightened. The burning sensation in the pit of his stomach flared in unison with that morbid thought.
Tomorrow would be the day of the graduating cadets would receive their deployment missions. Something, like his embarkment towards this life, that he regarded with mixed emotions. It wasn't a time Wilhelm had been looking forward to, nor did he wholly reject it. Rather… how should he put it, it was a feeling akin to when a soon-to-be executed prisoner accepts his foregone fate in muted resignation.
Lips pursed into a frown. Cobalt eyes moving towards the written line on the paper in quiet contemplation.
'Foregone conclusion, huh?' he repeated his written thoughts on paper, musing in bitter irony. 'Is that what my life has degenerated into? A slow and excruciating death?'
Silence clouded his mind.
'But…' he sighed, leaning back onto the back of the oversized chair. 'I can't say I have regretted it. Sure, it's the result of me shooting my mouth, yet I wouldn't change it for the world.'
He hunched back onto the paper, resuming his writing at his usual furious pace. With a bittersweet farewell, he ended the letter and sealed it into an empty white envelope. Normally, Wilhelm would have gone through it again before doing so, but it didn't feel right for him to restrict his words at this stage. The letter, to him currently, was not just a medium of communication; it was where he could pour his heart out in peace. Albeit, he still has to watch himself lest he accidentally spilt his secret in his blind thirst for catharsis.
Not that it mattered now.
Pinching the edge with the forefinger and thumb, and watching it zip across the surface like a zipline. Even with that much-needed catharsis, the gnawing emptiness still lingered obstinately. Wilhelm didn't exactly know what it was, other than it was a clear indication of his unvoiced sorrow. But of what? The grieving of his past life? Definitely not. While he could grudgingly say it was a decent one, it wasn't a life he was happy with.
So what could it be?
Or…
Wilhelm shook his head, disposing of that rogue thought. Immediately, he stood up, with the freshly sealed envelope in hand, and retired to his bunk.
'Maybe Tanya is right. I am a worrywart.'
The reincarnate's eyes briefly gleamed with acquiescence, raising them from the envelope to observe his excitably chattering bunkmates. A twinge of envious desire stung his heart, seeing them so carefree and oblivious to the sufferings that a military career would inadvertently bring. He shut his eyes, feeling a fleeting pity for them, how the truth of war would shatter their world.
Wilhelm dared not claim he knew exactly how monstrous war is, but he understood enough that it is not something that should be glamorised. Nor should it be completely seen as taboo. As long as humans continue to be ruled by their emotions, violence would always be inevitable. That much is certain, even if efforts have been made to curb it. That only left acceptance for the imperfections. That was how it's always been.
Ignoring his bunkmates' idle chat, he placed the envelope under his pillow and lay down on his bed, trying to get as much rest as he could get. Even if he knew it was going to be a long restless night. Just thinking about it only created a deeper doubt, a dread for the seemingly endless path ahead.
And the thought that he may have to blaze a new path, with its own brand of unknowns, almost nauseated him. Almost.
"You look like crap."
"Obviously," he struggled to stifle a lethargic yawn. "For once, I'm grateful to be born with dark eye rings."
"Do you always have a low tolerance for stress?" she snickered.
"Nah," snorted Wilhelm, softly and almost inaudibly. "Just that dealing with impossible court cases and trying to get over the grim possibilities are two separate matters."
"Grumpy, aren't you," muttered Tanya, studying her exhausted ally thoroughly. "Where do you think our deployment missions will be?"
"Probably Norden for you," he answered without a second thought. "And if I happen to have a streak of horrible luck, I'll end up in the Underworld."
"...Sleep deprivation woes, huh?"
"Possibly," the male reincarnate agreed, albeit absentmindedly. His attention in this conversation had long since lost. Right now, he was only interested in finding out whether this timeline still remains canon-compliant.
They parted with an unsaid farewell, standing in separate but uniform rows. Instinctively, Wilhelm locked his emotions away, letting his stoic mask take the helm as he awaited the undesirable news. An officer stood on stage, reciting a congratulatory speech that Wilhelm was sure had been reused multiple times over for previous ceremonies. He blocked it out, maintaining his concentration in front if only to anticipate for that dreaded moment.
It came after taking its sluggishly sweet time, and the answer he got was something he feared yet still within expectations.
"Warrant Officer Degurechaff!"
Said soldier came to the front, and stood in attention.
"You are to be deployed to Norden, for Artillery Observation!"
'As expected,' he thought to himself, idly observing his partner saluting respectfully and walking out of sight. 'So it's still canon-compliant, if not somewhat, but where do I fit in?'
The officer droned on, announcing each cadet's deployment site. Since Wilhelm's name was quite far behind, he had to wait patiently and with hidden trepidation. He would have rejoiced when his own name was called up upon, had he not already realised it would only lead to more trouble than the preceding wait was worth. Still, he had to take what he could get.
"Warrant Officer Schäfer!"
'Alright, here goes!'
Repeating what his peers before him had done, the reincarnate came to the front and stood in attention, seemingly ready to accept whatever orders that were given to him. He could feel his legs trembling slightly from adrenaline and from fear. Determined to not be bested by his emotions, Wilhelm fought to keep up his stoic appearances. For everything that is worth.
"Your deployment mission will be in the Rhine Theater, for scouting!"
'Ah, shit!' he mentally cursed, scowling inwardly. 'I just had to jinx myself, didn't I?! Now I actually got into that forsaken Hell on Earth!'
Outward appearance-wise, his countenance was the perfect definition of emotionless. Wilhelm dutifully completed the procedure as did his fellow cadets, stepping away after acknowledging his mission. All the while, he internally cussed himself out for his own rotten luck, to be sent to the worst deployment sites the Empire has to offer.
Luckily for the distressed reincarnate, he no longer had to maintain the appearance of composure. As far as he knew, once the ceremony was over the cadets will be sent back to their bunks to pack up, and after that, they seem to have the rest of the day to themselves. That was good enough; he had a letter to send anyway.
"Horrid luck," Tanya's mental voice transmitted into his mind from a distance, relaying a warped attempt at empathic disappointment, haphazardly concealed smugness and underlying concern. Understandable, since he was in a risky position now and both were deployed towards separate locations.
Not in the mood to respond, Wilhelm replied simply with a halfhearted mental grunt in acknowledgement.
'Well, at least she didn't rub it in my face, unlike Alberich's version of Tanya,' he comforted himself, trying to bear with that inflamed scorch that rose to a fever pitch in his chest. 'Then again, they didn't have this accursed soul link binding their literal essence together.'
"Where're you going?"
"Town," he replied tersely, waving a white envelope for emphasis. "I need to get this sent before the day ends."
"For Sister Hedwig?"
Wilhelm nodded in affirmation. Tanya didn't comment any more on that, wordlessly walking away to complete whatever business she was doing. He idly watched her disappear from his sight, before resuming his own errand. He walked out of the cadet school's premises, and off onto the short, sweet path leading to where the closest postal office was.
The trip and getting through the procedures for his letter was uneventful, save for the odd looks he got from random passersby. By then, he was already accustomed to the weekly treatment and something he could understand. After all, seeing a boy no older than nine in a military uniform was definitely not something you see every day.
After he got his letter through, the reincarnate was ready to call it a day and return to OCS. Or at least, that was the plan until he felt someone gingerly tapping him on the shoulder. He froze and stiffly turned around, ready to address whoever that had called for his attention. A girl in her late teenage years greeted him, her abashed expression marking her as the culprit.
"Pardon me," said a feminine voice apologetically. "Are you Wilhelm Schäfer?"
"That would be me," he confirmed after a hesitant pause, eyeing the girl suspiciously. "May I help you?"
"Oh! I'm just here to give you this," she handed the cadet a small cuboid package wrapped in brown paper. "Someone was going to have it delivered, but since you're here, we might as well give it to you in person."
"Thank you," said Wilhelm courteously, accepting the tiny parcel from the girl. He turned it around slowly and thoroughly, studying it as if to check for any suspicious details. "If I may ask, who sent this?"
"It's from the St. Basil's Orphanage," she answered honestly. "The records say the sender is a nun who apparently works there."
'Mother, is this from you?' he wondered, eyes lingering at his newly received package.
"Well… that's about it," stammered the teenaged worker, hastily dashing back to his post. "I'll be going back now."
Wilhelm nodded in acknowledgement, and hurriedly stepped out of the building. His brisk pace didn't slow down until he was far away from prying eyes. Swivelling around to check for any unwanted presences, stance relaxing when they were none. Deftly, he ripped the brown paper off of the package, curious to see what his mother had gifted him.
Out dropped a rufous leather-bound notebook. From its looks, it appeared to be suited for a journal, and unused as well. From its glossy sheen, the journal must have been fresh off of manufacturing. He picked it up, turning it over slowly, before opening the cover. His eyes widened in inquisitiveness when he noticed a note written in a yellowed paper attached to the cover. He ripped it out and began to read.
For my son, Albert Schäfer.
Underneath, in a frantic scrawl, was another message.
This has been your grandfather's gift to your father. It is unused, as you can see, as he wasn't the type to reminisce. I kept it around in his memory, but I think you would need it more. Best of luck to you, Wilhelm.
Your loving mother,
Hedwig
'She must have written this in a hurry,' noted Wilhelm, noticing the hasty handwriting.
Taking a moment to imprint the note in his memory, he stared blankly at the piece of paper. As soon as it happened, his cobalt eyes flared turquoise, letting his mana to engulf the material, setting it ablaze in phosphorous blue flames. His grip on the burning paper loosened lazily, letting it flutter forlornly to the ground. Within seconds, the paper had been scorched beyond recognition.
Quickly pocketing the journal and ensuring it remaining safely in storage, Wilhelm hurried back.
The day for departure came far too quickly and too bright for Wilhelm's liking.
The reincarnate adjusted the rifle slung over his shoulder, keeping an eye out for the clock at the train station. His companion walked briskly at his side, occasionally shooting him glances. The hubbub around them refused to cease, comprising of civilians rushing to and fro in a hurry, plausibly caught up in the frantic craze of the rush hour.
"Would this be farewell, then?" he said to no one in particular. Tanya turned her intense gaze towards him.
"Hopefully not," replied Tanya, raising a hand to adjust her oversized peaked cap. "I'd hate to think what sort of trouble you would get yourself into when left alone."
"Back at you," smirked Wilhelm, moving towards the designated platform where his train was supposed to be.
"Excuse me?"
"Never mind."
Wilhelm took a quick gander at the clock. 7.15 a.m., about fifteen minutes until his train is due to depart.
"Oh, right, before I forget," he said, playing with his tone to make it sound as if it was added as an afterthought. "I've got a few words of advice for you."
"What would that be?"
"Watch for interference," he answered, a dark ominous air creeping into those words. "As soon as you hear them, brace yourself for a fight. Doesn't matter whether you request for backup or not; you still need to engage in combat."
"Rather specific for 'a bit of advice', wouldn't you say?" she scoffed, although her body language did betray some uneasiness emanating from her otherwise solid façade.
"Hey, at least you know what's coming," he flashed her a toothy smile, his attempt in easing the grim atmosphere. "And we digressed. That is why it's best for you to carry extra ammo rounds on you. And bring along your rifle."
"You kidding?! That weighs like a ton, and that's not even taking the equipment I'm going to carry into account!"
"It's beneficial to you in the long run," he assured Tanya, waving his hands up and down in a 'calm down' gesture. "Trust me. I know what I'm saying."
"Sounds like you don't."
"Give me some credit here. I'm looking out for you."
'Well, at least Norden would very likely play out as I see it in the animé,' sighed Wilhelm in grudging acceptance. 'I would rather be there with her, but I guess beggars can't be choosers. I'll take what I can.'
The blaring whistle of the train shook his out of his reverie. A steam locomotive drove into view, coming to a screeching halt at the platform. Wilhelm turned towards his comrade, his lips curved up into an apologetic smile.
"Here's my ride," he said, almost monotonously. Wilhelm placed a hand on Tanya's shoulder in farewell. "Be safe, Tanya. Be seeing you later."
The cobalt-eyed reincarnate then left, many thoughts plaguing him as he walked further and further away from his companion of many years. But one remained strong within his mind.
'To the Rhine, huh?' he chuckled bitterly to himself, stepping on board the train. 'X is really aiming to knock me off the board early on, isn't he? I swear, this is almost like getting executed while being strapped to a ticking time bomb, especially with the Republic and the Empire's hostility are at an all-time high now.
'In the canon timeline the fiercest period of the war between the two nations didn't happen until after Tanya received the Silver Wings and the Type-95; if so, what kind of effects will this divergence bring? What is X plotting, anyway?'
Some mulling later, he came to a depressing conclusion that he would have no answer.
'Whatever it is, my objective remains the same,' thought Wilhelm, resolution from the beginning returning to him at full force. He settled himself in an empty compartment, purposefully choosing one on the opposite side so not to catch a glimpse of her. 'Making sure Tanya has the best possible ending; no matter the cost.
'The moment I accepted this stupid challenge, I have essentially become her guardian angel. I would ensure that I see this duty fulfilled.'