Chapter 14: First Birthday
Asgardians have an average lifespan of 5,100 years, so one's first year of life was considered nothing. That is what most Asgardians would say about their children on their first birthday. But Loki would call bullshit on that (something he had never said, but certainly thought a number of times.) As the days reached closer and closer to December 16th (according to the Midgardian calendar), Loki excited furthered for his daughter's first birthday. The god wanted the celebration of Eira's first year of life to be special yet small - Eira, and secretly Loki, hated being around large groups of people, a celebration with just the two of them would work perfectly.
The little princess was sleeping in her crib, completely unaware that today was the anniversary of her birth. Loki was dressed in his princely attire, looking through Eira's clothes and deciding on what of her tiny outfits she would wear. When Loki finally settled on an outfit, he heard Eira whining in her crib, waking up from her nightly slumber.
Eira had recently learned to sleep through the night, only waking up whenever she heard a loud noise. Two months prior, she took her first steps in Loki's chambers, though she fell on her face and cried during her first attempt. It was her second cry where she successfully walked across the room into her father's arms. Loki could feel the smile on his face growing wider and prouder as Eira took each wobbling step.
She even learned to say more words besides "dada" and "no". Frigga had become "gg-ma", which was Eira's failed attempt to say "grandma". Her third word had been "nor", which was how she said Thor (babies have difficulty pronouncing "th".) Eira was in the same room as Thor and she had called his name when she saw him. Thor was shocked that his niece knew his name, but his surprise quickly turned to joy as he hugged Eira.
"Don't fuss, Eira," said Loki as he picked up his daughter from her crib. "I am right here. You should not be upset, one year ago today was the day of your birth. Be excited."
Eira stopped fussing once she heard her father's voice. She had absolutely no idea what Loki was speaking on about, just pleased to know he was talking to her. It seemed Loki was more excited about her birthday than the actual birthday princess.
Loki set Eira down on his bed as he changed her into a dark purple jumpsuit with light teal hems. The one-year-old did make it difficult, as she was kicking her legs unaware that it was bothering her father. Loki did not mind, as he knew it was typical for babies to move their limbs strangely.
"It will just be you and me today," Loki said to Eira as he finished putting her in the dress, lifting her up and placing her on his hip. "You will definitely see some of your family, but I plan for us to spend the day today. I do not wish to burden you with all the residents of the palace annoyingly doting on you. It annoys me as well. We'll have some jollity together. I'll play with you, aid you in opening your many presents, and even have cake, though your piece will be very small. You will probably not remember it, but you will enjoy it, I promise."
In response, Eira giggled and clapped her hands, lacking the skills to understand all the words her father was saying. She had no clue what Loki meant by "birthday", but she knew it would be an exciting day.
#
Eira was a little princess, so it made sense that she would be completely spoiled on her birthday. She got plentiful of dresses, none of which she liked. Although she was a princess, she hated wearing them. Loki noticed she was fussier on days where she wore dresses. It was safest to put her in a jumpsuit; she was the happiest a baby she could be when wearing one. Loki knew she would grow out of it, but at the moment she was perfectly content with the abundance of toys she received as gifts. Eira would be entertained with those toys for the rest of her infancy, though Loki was annoyed that his chambers looked more and more like it belonged to Eira instead of him.
"Alright, Eira," Loki said to Eira as he wrapped her in a towel. He had just finished bathing her which, depending on the day and how Eira felt, it was either a hassle or simply part of a tranquil day. Luckily, she decided to behave well for her birthday and not splash water on her father. "Let's get you to bed."
Eira whined, kicking her legs and hitting her father in the stomach. Loki winced then chuckled as he settled Eira into his arms, grabbing one of her nearby nightgowns. "It is already rather late, much past your bedtime. I want you to get to sleep so you are not fussy tomorrow."
Loki put Eira in her nightgown and then reached for a hairbrush. He had to learn to brush her hair recently, as Eira's hair had grown slightly past her ears and, as described by Frigga, ridiculously curly. Her mother's hair was also insanely curly. Loki remembered thinking it when he first saw Runa and additionally remembering times when Runa complained about it herself. Reminders of these moments with his lover always managed to make Loki happy, but this time was different. The remembrance of those events began like they always did, but then Loki realized a fatal detail.
Today was the one-year anniversary of Runa's death.
Loki felt like an idiot to forget about the untimely death of his lover. In the short year and several months they spent as a couple, Loki had the best time of his life. He had never met someone who fully understood and motivated him until he met Runa. She was the perfect being, and there were times where Loki felt as if he did not deserve her. But then there were times when they both expressed their dissatisfied feelings and it was fairly obvious that Loki and Runa were perfect for one another. Loki remembered his feelings of panic and fear when he discovered Runa was two months pregnant only six months into their relationship. The fear subsided, but more and more moments of joy occurred as Runa's stomach grew with their little girl.
Everything was perfect, but just like all good things, it had to end.
"Dada."
Loki shook his head and looked at Eira, her eyes with tears at the corners and her hands pressed against his arm in concern. Loki lifted Eira into his arms and soothed her while trying to calm himself. As he rubbed her back and whispered comforting words, he realized a tear or two had fallen down his cheek.
"I'm sorry, Eira," whispered Loki. "I should not have overshadowed your birthday with grim memories."
Eira had no absolute idea about what happened to her mother. She probably could not even recognize Runa. Loki was the only parent she had, so he couldn't be depressed. He could not let the fact that Eira was short one parent to effect her childhood. It was Loki's duty to raise Eira, aid her in having an enjoyable life and helping her become a respectful woman. He could not afford to focus on the past, raising Eira was his future, and Loki was perfectly content with doing so. He would not forget Runa, but he had to move on from her death. Loki would face it again someday when he would have to tell Eira the truth about her mother, but that would be years from now.
Loki shifted his hold on Eira, the side of her face leaning against his chest in a sleepy manner. He stroked her cheek, whispering to her to soothe her into slumber. It eventually worked - like it always did - and Eira's breathing evened while her little body leaned further into her father's embrace. Loki kissed her head.
"I'll do my best, I promise."
…
"Shit."
Thor shook his head as he realized what day it was: his brother's birthday. Normally, he would be excited. He loved and respected Loki, even when he was mischievous and annoying. But like he did last year, Thor had forgotten to get a present for Loki. He luckily had an opportunity the previous year to watch the recently born Eira so Loki could eat. He could do the same this year, but Loki would not be pleased. His younger brother saw the lie then but was thankful for some time to look after himself, even though it was only for two hours. If Thor did the same thing again, Loki would certainly be annoyed, but the older prince had to do something.
To Hel with it. Thor would look after Eira for the day while Loki enjoyed a more relaxing birthday. Loki would make quips and snarky remarks, but giving Loki the day off, or at least a couple of hours, from parenting. It was the least Thor could do for his brother.
#
Loki normally did not receive knocks in the morning, not unless there was an emergency and he was being requested by his father. But there was no known tension or conflict at this time, at least not any that Loki knew of. When he heard the light knock Loki raised his eyebrow, looking away from his mirror he had been using whilst combing his hair. He let go of the brush and moved toward the door. Before he answered, he turned his eyesight to Eira who was sleeping peacefully in her crib, making sure she was safe before he answered (seemingly rather pointless, as there was no threat of danger nearby, but Loki was an extremely overprotective father.) There was a hint of surprise in Loki's eyes when he opened the door and came face to face with his older brother.
"Hello, brother," Thor said in an uncomfortable manner, confusing Loki. Thor was always overconfident, durable, and proudly ignorant. It was surprising to witness him so timid. "I wanted to congratulate you for another birthd-"
"Stop with the bullshit, Thor." interrupted Loki. "Why are you here at this hour?"
Thor sighed before he answered.
"Before I say anything, shame on you for swearing near your year-old daughter. Now, my gift to you this year, I watch Eira for the day while you relax for the first time in what I am guessing for a long time. I will take her and her belonging and necessities to my chambers while you stay in yours; maybe sleep, bathe, or really anything to help yourself. You deserve to do so after all."
Loki simply stared at his brother for a moment before speaking.
"You forget to get me a gift this year. Again."
"No. That is not true."
"Yes, it is, Thor. Stop lying. I knew last year as well, but I said nothing because it actually was helpful. But this is just sad."
"What is wrong with wanting to help you?"
"Nothing, I wish it did not seem desperate."
"It is not desperate."
"Really, then did you get me a physical gift?"
"No, but ... "
"Hel, Thor. You are so full of shit."
"What did I say about swearing?"
"She is asleep and we are standing several feet away from her. She cannot hear us."
"You do not know that."
"Thor, this bittering is so tiring. Will you please just leave so we do not wake Eira up?"
"Loki," Thor said as he put a hand on Loki's shoulder. "I just want to help. Just let me do this. Please."
Loki sighed as he turned his head to look towards his daughter, still sleeping peacefully in her crib. What was the longest time he had been away from Eira? He had gone on missions, the longest one lasting for a week. Loki never had any time for himself since Eira was born, either spending his days caring for her or going away to another realm for his royal duties. He did not want to spend time away from his daughter while not working, but a few hours did not seem bad.
"You can watch her for eight hours. I want Eira back by the late afternoon."
Thor let out a breath and then smiled, pleased that his younger brother finally accepted his offer. "I will take Eira to my chambers now. I can also take her crib and toys with me if that is alright with you."
Loki nodded as he reached into Eira's crib, picking the princess up and settling her into his gentle grasp. "Let me change her into her daywear before you leave."
Thor nodded and looked around the room for Eira's toys while his brother attempted to change his daughter without waking her up. By the time Loki finished, Thor had managed to grab a couple of toys and wrap them around Eira's playing carpet. He sneakily grabbed one of Loki's garments, as he knew Eira would definitely miss her father and would be calmed by his scent (if Frigga had not told him this useful fact, then today would have certainly been a struggle for Thor.) Placing the carpet into the crib, Thor lifted it and moved it to his side while carrying it with one arm. He shifted his eyes to Loki, seeing the God of Mischief kiss Eira's forehead.
"You better take good care of my daughter," Loki said as he passed Eira to Thor. The princess shifted uncomfortably before settling into her uncle's grasp.
"You worry too much," was all Thor spoke as he left the room, leaving Loki alone in his chambers for the first time in what felt like forever.
When the door to his chambers shut, Loki let out a heavy breath and leaned against the wall in relief. What was he to do? He could sleep, but he was not tired at the moment. Whenever Eira was asleep or napping, Loki would do what he referred to as "get shit done time", as those were the only moments where Loki could fully care for himself. Now without the worry of a fussy infant, Loki could actually get some tasks done successfully.
Maybe this arrangement would not be as terrible as Loki thought.
#
Let's see how this day goes, Thor thought as he placed the light green carpet on the floor. Even though Thor was the one who thought of watching Eira for a few hours, he had no idea about what would happen. He did not fully know how to care for a one-year-old. He tried to remember what Loki was like when he was only a year into his life, but due to Thor being just a year older than his brother, his memory of that time was rather dull.
"Dada?"
Thor turned around and saw his niece sitting in her crib, one hand curled around a rail while she looked around the room for her father. Sensing that the disappoint in her findings was upsetting the young princess, Thor walked over to the crib, lifting his niece into his strong arms.
"It's alright, Eira," comforted Thor as he rubbed Eira's back. "You have nothing to worry about. Your father is away for a little bit, but I am here. It will be alright."
Eira was still rather upset to not be in the same room as Loki and therefore her cries did not diminish. Thor spent several minutes pacing around the room to soothe the princess but became distressed upon his failure. His gaze averted to the center of the room, where a short of Loki's sat upon a pile of toys. He moved to the carpet, picking up the garment and placing it near Eira's face. The princess was confused as to why her uncle was putting a piece of fabric on her face, but soon recognized the scent of her father exerted by the shirt. She removed the shirt from Thor's grasp and hugged it as tightly as an infant could while muttering "dada."
Thor sighed as he placed Eira on the carpet. He reached into the pile of toys and grabbed a few, putting them near his niece. Eira, with her father's shirt now laying over her tiny shoulder, still whined when the toys were placed in her view. After a few moments, she noticed Hati, her favorite toy, among the pile and immediately took it, holding it close to her chest.
"Ha," said Eira with a smile on her face.
"You are such a handful," complained Thor, though it was somewhat ironic due to the slight smile on his face.
He took a strand of Eira's hair and put it behind her ear. In response, Eira giggled, looking up at her uncle with a grin. Thor took Eira and placed her on his lap. Simply watching Eira play, Thor was content with this situation. After the battles, fights, and tension he frequently saw and took part in, it was rather nice to see a sight so tranquil. At the moment, it was just Thor and his innocent niece, who was pleased with the simplest of things. To Thor, it was truly pleasant.
#
"Are you feeling alright?"
Runa turned her head to look at her lover, stroking her hair with his face showing a slight expression of concern. She placed her hand on her round stomach, feeling the strong kicks of her unborn daughter.
"I'm fine as I can be right now, Loki. Are you sure you want to be here?"
"Why wouldn't I be? I am never here for any of your appointments. I just want to make sure that you and the baby are healthy."
Runa looked away, highly uncomfortable with the situation she was in. It made sense to Loki. She was seven months pregnant, often feeling unwell, and now was laying down on a table while being inspected by healers in areas in which Runa wished no one would see. She complied with the simple reason for wanting her daughter to be healthy. Loki, who had never witnessed one of these appointments due to his missions, simply wanted to comfort his lover.
"Runa," said Loki sternly. "The healers are almost done. As soon this is finished we can return to our chambers and rest."
Comforted by Loki's words, Runa smiled and allowed Loki to stroke her cheek. She could not lie, his presence made the appointment slightly more tolerable. She held his hand throughout the inspection, grasping it tightly whenever she was in pain. Loki was impressed by her grip, which was surprisingly strong. He did not say anything and kept a straight face throughout.
"The baby is doing alright," said one of the healers. "She's slightly bigger than average, but it should not be too worrisome. Otherwise, she is perfectly healthy. She has quite a strong kick. Do you have any questions?"
Loki looked to Runa, simply expressing his question with his face. In response, Runa shook her head while sitting up. The healers noticed and began cleaning the room, meaning that the couple could leave. After aiding Runa in standing, Loki led her out of the room, saying "thank you" to all the healers.
"I have not felt this exhausted in a while," said Runa as she and Loki left the medical room. "I was fine yesterday, I didn't feel like taking a nap at any moment."
"I'm so sorry," Loki said as he put his arm around Runa's waist. "It's my fault that this happened."
"It is actually only half your fault. It takes two to make a baby."
Loki chuckled as he reached the doors to his chambers. "Well, I think I have something to make the rest of your day better."
Runa raised her eyebrow as Loki opened the doors, revealing the room covered in fanciest decorations in all of the Nine Realms. Near the balcony, there was a table filled with food and wine, adorned with the most exquisite dishware. She turned to her fiance, an expression of confusion written all over her face.
"When did you set all of this up and why?"
"I had this arranged by the servants while we were at your appointment. I thought this would be rather amiable and tranquil to you since you have not been feeling well as of late. But I'm honestly surprised, I thought you would remember that today marks one year since we began our relationship."
"No, I guess I did not. There has just been so much happening lately. I'm sorry I did not remember."
"I do not blame you for forgetting," said Loki as he pulled out a chair for himself and Runa. "I almost did as well. If I had not gone to the gardens yesterday, I would have never recognized it."
Runa sat down and grabbed a nearby bottle of wine. "Do you really think alcohol will be good for our unborn daughter?"
"It is non-alcoholic wine," stated Loki as he shook his head. "If you do not want it, I have some herbal teas."
"I much as I miss the taste of wine, a herbal tea sounds terrific. It will probably make me feel better as well."
"Alright then."
Loki went to a cabinet and searched for some herbal tea, leaving Runa alone with her thoughts.
"One year. We have been dating for one year and will be parents in less than two months (at the time, they had no idea that Eira would be born a month early.) It all feels so rushed."
Loki returned with the tea and a cup, pouring it into the glass and giving it to Runa. "Well, we definitely did some things early into our relationship."
"Sex," interrupted Runa.
Loki laughed. "Yes, but I don't regret any of it. Even though I got you pregnant only several months after we started dating, it does not feel rushed now. I cannot imagine my life without you and the baby."
"Me too," nodded Runa in agreement. "I never imagined that I would be in this situation years ago. But now, I am both terrified and excited to become a parent. It sounds so strange."
"No, I feel the exact same. I know we are young, but I cognize that we will do well. I think you will be a wonderful mother to her."
Runa blushed. "And you will be an excellent father. I love you so much, Loki."
"I love you too."
Loki woke up to the sun setting. His eyes adjusted to the real world, wishing slightly that he could return to his dream; when times were simpler. At least this dream did not turn into a nightmare, as a previous memory dream did. Judging by the orange sky, it was the late afternoon.
It was time to pick up Eira.
On his day off, Loki spent the first four hours organizing his room and taking care of himself. It felt relaxing, probably because there was no threat of a baby crying to distract him. He then slept for the next few hours, and for the first time in months, Loki felt truly well-rested.
Thor's chambers were nearby and when Loki reached them, he could hear a faint giggle. He knocked on the door. Before the door opened, Loki could hear shuffling from the other side; Thor most likely was playing with his niece.
When the door opened, Loki did not pay attention at first, as his vision went immediately to Eira who was holding a toy while looking at the door, trying to see who knocked. When she realized it was her father at the door, the biggest smile formed on Eira's face. With a squeal of "dada", the princess stood up and ran to her father, though she did not get far as Loki was also moving toward her and lifted her into his arms when at a close distance.
"Well, since she is still here, I take it that your adventure in babysitting was successful?" mocked Loki to Thor while he could not contain a grin at his giggling daughter.
"She was fine, hardly cried at all," lied Thor.
"Oh really?" questioned Loki as his eyes averted to his shirt on the carpet. "She was so calm that you did not have to use a soothing technique that mother definitely told you to use?"
"Okay, Loki. I know what you are getting at. But I did what I said I would, you cannot deny or make fun of me for that."
"Surprisingly, I cannot argue with that. But I am sure that I can find a way to mock for it during dinner" (These two never changed. To quote Sif, it was "fucking exhausting".)
Loki eventually returned to his chambers with all of the materials he brought to Thor's rooms. He set Eira on her carpet and let her play as he prepared his attire for dinner tonight. Once finished, he turned to Eira, giggling and babbling nonsense while she played with Hati.
Eira's first year passed by fast, and Loki did not know it yet, but the next year would go by even faster. It was fascinating to see her learn more words, explore the world, and keep her father entertained and proud every single day. By the time she turned two, Eira was a beautiful little princess. Smart for her age and enthralled by stories of battle, Loki was amazed to see his little girl slowly getting her personality and interests. Whenever he was with Eira, Loki was glad he decided to become a father. Even though she was not physically there with him, Loki knew Runa would be proud of Eira. It was enough.