Edward and I have been official for just over a month, and now I can't really imagine him as just a friend ever again. The best part is that we're still us. He's the exact same Edward I knew and loved before I knew I loved him romantically. Nothing between us has really changed except for the fact that we kiss whenever we want, have sex on the reg, and share my bed every night.

Of course, we're still faced with the daunting fact that he's leaving in a few months. But I decide not to dwell on it and enjoy my time with him while he's still here. We make plans for the next year, talking frequently about both of us making a point to fly out every now and then. I don't expect it to be easy, and I'm still slightly worried, but I keep those thoughts to myself, hoping Edward's assurance is enough for the both of us.

XXX

I'm in the kitchen making dinner when Alice walks in. I haven't seen her for a while, but I figured she wasn't dead since the entirety of our rent got paid last week.

I pause the podcast I'm listening to, glancing her way. "Hi," I greet, shaking some red pepper flakes into my bubbling tomato sauce.

She points to the container of grated parmesan cheese next to the stove. "May I?"

"Um. Sure?"

She grabs some with her bare hands then sprinkles a trail from the kitchen to the dining area before disappearing into the living room. I gotta give the girl credit—she definitely keeps things interesting and somehow ups the shock factor with each interaction.

I turn off the burner so the sauce can cool, and I'm about to drain the noodles when I feel something hairy brush against my foot. I jump out of my bones before I even look down, my scream instant when I see a large rat. I scramble away, hopping on the counter. It's just sitting there, unconcerned, sticking its ugly face into a pile of parmesan.

Alice rushes back into the kitchen. "There you are." She reaches down and picks the rat up, holding it against her chest. "What did I tell you about escaping, Thaddeus?"

"Why?" I ask, unable to properly get a full sentence out.

She looks at me as if I'm the crazy person. "Why not? Rats make great company." With that, she shuffles back downstairs.

Seconds later, Edward walks into the kitchen and finds me perched on the counter.

"Do I even wanna know?" he asks, smirking as he holds out a hand to help me down.

"I just met Alice's pet rat," I tell him, shuddering. "Although I'm not sure it's actually her pet because she referred to him as Thaddeus… the name of her so-called boyfriend."

Edward begins shaking with laughter, which is honestly the most appropriate way to react. I'm still slightly traumatized though.

"Yeah, laugh it up," I say flatly. "You're the one who gets to move out, and I'll be stuck here. You should be worried, not amused."

"Man, I'm gonna miss this place."

I quirk an eyebrow, pulling out the colander. "Seriously?"

"Yeah." He spoons some sauce into his mouth, humming in approval. "Never a dull moment around here."

I lean against the counter, crossing my arms. "You do have sort of an inclination toward weird things. Like me, for example. And the fact that you like when I lick—"

"Save it for the bedroom." The tops of his cheeks and ears turn pink, and I laugh, moving closer and wrapping my arms around his waist. "But you're right about the first part. I find you pretty damn endearing, Swan."

I look up at him, heart overwhelmed by the way he's staring back at me, and kiss his chin. "I love you, too."

His eyes practically dance when he grins. "Too implies I said it first, which I did not."

Well, crap.

I've spent the last couple of weeks casually thinking about how easy it was to fall for him, tossing around the word "love" in my head. It was bound to slip out sooner or later. I didn't necessarily mean for it to happen right now though.

"What I meant was—"

"You can't take back an admission of love," he teases. "That's wrong on so many levels."

"But—" He spoons some sauce into my mouth to shut me up.

"I knew it." He kisses the tip of my nose, staring down at me. His teasing is gone and his features soften, smile so warm. "You love me."

"That's not how this was supposed to happen," I protest, dropping my arms from his body. "I have tomato sauce on my face and grated parmesan stuck to my feet and—"

"I don't care," he laughs quietly, eyes still trained on my face. "I don't care about any of that because… I love you too."

Just like that, my heart soars. "You do?"

"I do."

"You could've started with that instead of making me get all crazy-eyed." I push against his torso, but there's zero conviction behind it because he just admitted to loving me, and that makes up for the fact that he purposely riled me up.

The tiniest glint of humor dances in his eyes when he grabs my waist and pulls me against him. "But I love when you get all crazy-eyed."

"You do?" I ask again.

"Uh huh." He dips his head, kissing me deeply. "I wouldn't change a thing about you."

It's undeniably sexy hearing him speak so openly about his feelings. He makes me feel safe and secure, not just in this relationship, but in who I am. He loves me, wouldn't change me, and embraces my brand of crazy. I don't know how he did it but for once, my heart feels a little more open. I feel like the luckiest emotionally-stunted girl in the world.

XXX

Summer slowly fades into fall. It's annoying that with the next season change, Edward will be gone. As much as I don't want to think about it, there's always a little reminder with each day that passes. Like when he spends his evenings online searching for an apartment in LA, asking my opinion on location and size. Or when he reminds me to put the electric in my name so it's all squared away when he leaves. Or like tonight, when he begins working on the Craigslist ad to sublet his room for the year.

We're in my room, like always, sprawled out across the bed.

"You could probably rent out the room before January," I tell him, scrolling through Instagram. "You never sleep in there anymore. It's really just a glorified closet."

"We don't sleep in my room because I like your bed more than mine."

"You shouldn't. Yours is comfier," I protest.

"But your bed smells like you. Therefore, I like it better."

He's sitting up against the headboard, laptop on his stomach, so I straddle him. Leaning over close to his ear I whisper, "You're too charming for your own good."

"It's easy with you." He lifts his chin a bit, kissing me. "I was thinking…"

"What?"

"What if when I'm in Seattle again, I don't move back into this house."

I frown. "Where would you go?"

Moving the laptop off his stomach, he grabs my waist, thumbs brushing over my hips. "What if we got a place? Just the two of us?"

"Oh."

"Don't freak out," he says preemptively, gauging my reaction.

"I'm not freaking out," I promise, leaning forward so our chests meet. "I think we should do it."

His face lights up so bright and he places a sweet kiss on my mouth. "That was easy," he says after a moment, eyes narrowed. "A little too easy."

"Overthinking doesn't look good on you," I laugh, sitting back up but staying on him. "Let me be the one to do that, 'kay?"

"I'm not trying to overthink, but I thought you were gonna turn down the idea. I had a whole speech planned."

"Oh? Do tell."

"Nah," he says, twinkle in his eyes. "I think I'll save it if I need to convince you of something in the future."

"Well no convincing needed for this. If we hadn't already lived together for the last however many years, it would seem like a huge step. But… this makes sense. And really by then, we'll have outgrown this place and seriously be over living with Emmett."

"I've already outgrown this place," he tells me. "In fact, I could've lived on my own like, two years ago."

"Why didn't you move out then?"

All he does is shrug, but the vulnerability of his face gives him away. The way his gaze bounces around, not holding mine. The small way his mouth curls into a self-deprecating smile, ears growing pinker by the second.

He stayed because of me.

"I love you, you know that?" My voice is barely a whisper.

His vulnerability shifts to confidence. "I love you, too."

Leaning forward again, I kiss him softly, sweetly. The kiss deepens, and I begin to feel him lengthen against me, but he pulls back.

"I gotta finish this," he says, patting my thighs. "I'm almost done. And then we can… yeah."

"Okay, okay," I groan, moving next to him.

He adjusts himself then grabs the laptop, eyes bouncing back to the screen. "Would you be okay with the new roommate having a pet?"

"No more pets. One rat is plenty, and I clean up after Em enough." He's actually gotten better now that he has Rose. "A cat would be fine, maybe. But only if it's not an asshole."

"Got it," he muses, eyes on the screen as he types 'no asshole cats.'

"Don't actually put that," I laugh, swatting his hands away from the keys. "Besides, no one is aware enough to know if their pet is an asshole. It's like having a kid. Everyone thinks their child is an angel when in reality they're demon spawn."

"Isn't that a bit harsh?"

"Nah. I can say that though 'cause I was pretty demonic. Poor Charlie."

"I bet you were adorable." He grins. "Luckily I think I have enough normalcy to level out your crazy genes, so our kids wouldn't be evil." He says it nonchalantly, like he didn't just offer up some big fucking news about us. He referenced our nonexistent kid. Which means he wants to have a baby… with me. And potentially get married, if he's traditional like I think he is.

A million thoughts start to run through my head. Because I'm not traditional. I don't need the wedding or the marriage license or anything like that because being legally bound still doesn't mean the other person will stay forever. It doesn't mean anything, actually. I bite the inside of my cheek, trying to turn my negative thoughts around.

There is something intriguing about doing all of that with Edward. To go against what I thought I never wanted and take a fucking chance. To believe in something despite being fueled by fear. And I know he hasn't asked me, and marriage has never come up. But I'm thinking about it now. After the initial shock has worn off, it's not as scary as I thought it'd be.

I'm still staring at him, half expecting him to realize what he just said and take it back. But he doesn't. When I'm quiet long enough and he feels my gaze, his eyes settle on my face.

"What's up?"

"You can't just throw out bombs like that, man."

He's completely unaffected by what he just said. "Bombs like what? That you're crazy?"

I shake my head, voice quieter than intended. "No, the other part."

"That you were a cute kid?" he asks, but I see his small smirk there, and he knows what I'm talking about. He's just gonna make me be the one to say it.

"You referenced our nonexistent kids."

"Oh. I guess I did. Too soon?" He's casual about it, and I merely shrug. "I do want kids. Someday."

It's not something I'd thought about before now but, "Yeah, me too."

I leave out the part where I'd do it just for him. I'd have his babies, and I'd be his fucking wife. I'd do all that domestic shit because despite me being completely guarded and scared out of my mind, he moseyed his way into my heart. And now that he's here and sparking new ideas and feelings for me, I can't imagine being without him. So, yeah. I do want kids, but only with him. And if he asks me again, I'll tell him just that.

Oh my fluff. Hope y'all enjoyed this chapter as much I enjoyed writing it.

A million thanks to the sweet miss Hadley for her help!