Quick confession I didn't actually see the Crisis cross over until I was halfway done with the chapter, it has no real effect on it, but I know I mentioned it a lot last chapter. In any case next chapter might be delayed by a day or two. I'm working a lot and barely have time to write. We're getting down to it now. Next chapter we will finally be back to the present so enjoy this Sanvers flashback chapter. Thanks for reading, tell me what you think and as always enjoy.

Chapter 15

Alex sat at her desk in her office, cellphone in hand finger hovering over Kelly Olsen's name. She hadn't spoken to her ex in over four years, though Olsen made it very clear that she was always there for Alex both as a friend and as a doctor. Alex knew she needed to talk to someone, she hated shrinks but Olsen was different, and her methods for helping people suffering from PTSD were revolutionary. She wouldn't judge Alex for asking for help, but Alex wasn't sure calling her ex (even if they were still good friends) was the best idea. She could just go to the department shrink, it would have the same results.

Then again she knew she would never talk to someone she didn't know very well. As much as she wanted to sit down with Maggie and just talk about everything that was wrong she knew she couldn't put that all on her wife. At least with Olsen she wouldn't feel guilty, it was her job after all to help and listen, and even though Alex wasn't suffering from PTSD (she actually was but that wasn't what was at the root of her problems at the moment) Olsen had told her it was alright for her to reach out to her if she needed.

She set her phone aside, leaning farther back in her chair. She didn't want to bother Olsen with something she could deal with on her own, or with Maggie. Once everything was over she would consider going to therapy. Truth was all three of the Sawyer-Danvers family needed therapy. Maggie was the most mentally healthy of the three, Kelly was slowly getting worse and her drinking was starting to resemble Alex's when she was in college. Alex was just struggling to keep her family safe, it was starting to wear her down to the point she thought she may have to step down for a while.

Things had never been easy for them. Kelly had taken a long time to adjust to her new situation when she came to live with Alex. It hadn't been very long after that (a mere six months if she was remembering correctly) Maggie had come back into her life which was a learning curve for all of them. Suddenly Maggie and Alex had been back in their old patterns, but with Kelly in the mix it brought a whole other dynamic, one that Maggie slipped into easily, but Alex initially struggled with. It wasn't that she didn't want Maggie back it was just after more than two years without her it wasn't easy to let her back in.

Kelly had been extremely excited once she learned it had rained and had all but begged Alex to go outside so she could jump into puddles. Alex couldn't say no to her, it had been a rough couple of months and Kelly was slowly starting to get use to Alex being her mom. She still disliked any kind of physical contact. This had been one of the few times she grabbed Alex's hand on her own free will and with excitement instead of fear.

"Can we, please?"

"Sure," Alex said with a smile. "Go get your boots and jacket."

Alex watched Kelly scurry off to get ready. She loved that girl with all of her heart and seeing her wanting to actively do something with Alex without being forced to. They still had a lot of work to do but this was progress and Alex was happy with it, any progress was better than no progress. Kelly came running out minutes later in blue rain boots and a rain jacket her aunt Kara had given her not long after she came to live with Alex.

"Ready kiddo?"

Kelly grabbed her hand, all but dragging her to the apartment door. "Yep!" Alex smiled allowing herself to be lead down the hallway to the elevator. She let Kelly press the buttons, knowing the girl got enjoyment out of it. Sometime it surprised her how different the girl holding her hand was from the one Alex had coaxed out of a small closet months ago.

It was still sprinkling outside but it was nowhere near the downpour it had been earlier. Kelly released her hand once they started walking, ending up ahead of Alex so she could splash in the puddles without getting Alex too wet. Alex let her go ahead within reason, just happy that Kelly was enjoying herself without hesitation. She had figured they would go to the park that way Kelly could run around for a while before they headed back. It wasn't a long walk from her apartment and the second they reached the park Kelly was off giggling to herself as she went from puddle to puddle.

Alex followed silently with a smile, not very aware of her surroundings outside of where Kelly was off too. She was so focused on Kelly she didn't see the woman walking her direction until she ran into her nearly causing her to fall. The woman caught her, a strong hand wrapping around her arm. Alex looked up her apology already forming on her lips. She didn't get any further than that.

"Long time Danvers," Maggie said pulling her back to a standing position. "I'm flattered you're still falling for me."

Her face was burning, she hadn't seen Maggie since she left National City, and for her to be there, inches away from Alex was almost too much. She was glad Kelly had seemed to take notice of her absence and had stopped moving away from them. Alex noticed that Kelly was staring at Maggie curiously with the same hesitation she had originally had with Alex.

"I-I um…" Alex shook her head trying to collect her thoughts. "What are you doing back?"

"There are a lot of reasons," Maggie admitted. "I heard they were having trouble with the Science division, figured I should come back and get it back on the right track."

"We could use someone from the NCPD as a liaison with the DEO again," Alex said already falling back into easily talking shop with Maggie. "We've been butting heads more and more."

Maggie grinned, clearly open to negotiations. There was something else there, behind her smile that Alex knew all too well but wasn't sure if she should mention it. They hadn't been together for years, she shouldn't get her hopes up. Maggie seemed to notice Alex's hesitation because she turned to face Kelly who was still standing in an ankle deep puddle watching the two of them.

"You ever going to introduce me Alex?"

"Right, sure," Alex said with a nod. "Kel, hey come here for a sec I want to introduce you to someone."

Kelly slowly walked over to them, positioning herself behind Alex's leg suddenly (but not surprisingly) very shy. Alex smiled down at her, trying to reassure her it was alright before kneeling down next to her.

"Kelly this is Maggie, a really good friend of mine." She glanced up at Maggie, a small smile playing on her lips. "Maggie this is Kelly, my daughter."

Maggie didn't attempt to reach out or kneel down, realizing that Kelly was afraid of her, or at the very least unsure of what to make of the stranger. She did smile, a genuine smile Alex hadn't seen in a long time. Something about it was enough to get Kelly to muster a very quiet hi.

"It's nice to meet you Kelly," she said.

There was a silence between the three of them. Kelly was nervous around new people, she would barely talk to Lena but with Kara was open and always super excited to spend time with her (probably having something to do with the fact Kara was Supergirl and Kelly knew it). She would warm up to Maggie eventually, she was still getting use to Alex.

"It's alright, we'll keep walking if you want," Alex said when Kelly tugged on her jacket.

Kelly nodded taking her time to launch herself into on puddle to the next. Maggie offered her hand to help Alex back to her feet, the two of them starting off after Kelly. Alex had never thought that seeing Maggie again would be like this. There had been so much time that had passed, so much had changed since they had last seen on another. She thought their first run in would be difficult (then again she never thought she would see Maggie again). As it turned out they easily fell back into it like nothing had ever happened. There were dozens of explanations for the way Maggie was acting, Alex wasn't sure if she wanted to know where this would lead.

"So…I'm curious," Maggie started, "Kelly, is um…adopted, I take it the circumstances weren't great?"

"Observant as ever," Alex chuckled. "Cadmus raid. We were arresting one of their members, found her, and after what happened with the Children of Liberty both alien and meta-human kids have trouble getting adopted. I didn't really have a choice. Not that I would have done anything differently."

"Of course not, you are the most selfless person I know," Maggie said. "She's lucky to have you."

"I'm lucky too," Alex said. "And now you're back, maybe the universe doesn't hate me as much as I thought."

Kelly chose that moment to launch herself in a puddle that resulted in both Maggie and Alex getting wet. Maggie couldn't stop herself from laughing at Alex for the miserable look that crossed her face, she had hated water since the time she nearly drowned. One thing she noticed was that Alex didn't show her annoyance to Kelly she didn't let the girl know that she wasn't having fun getting wet herself.

"So does that mean if I ask for you to get coffee with me, you'll say yes?"

"How could I ever say no?"

Maggie smiled nudging Alex with her shoulder. "You can't that's my point," she joked proud that she could still make Alex laugh.

After that the two fell into a comfortable silence as they followed behind Kelly. The silence lasted for over an hour until Kelly started getting tired and asked Alex to go home. Alex wasn't exactly ready to say her goodbyes to Maggie again but this time she knew she would be seeing her again fairly soon.

"See you around Danvers," Maggie said leaning in to kiss Alex's cheek. "I'll try not to be a stranger this time around."

"You know where to find me," Alex said. "Let me know when you want to get coffee."

Maggie nodded. Some things hadn't changed at all in the last few years and for that Alex was grateful. She stood with Kelly as Maggie walked away. The last time Maggie had left both of them had been crying, hearts breaking. It had been the worst day of her life. This time, watching Maggie leave she knew it wouldn't be forever, they would see each other soon. Maggie wanted to be back in her life and as hesitant as she was to let that happen again, Alex would be lying to herself if she said she wasn't happy to have Maggie back. Maybe things would be alright between them after all.

Alex rubbed her eyes. She shouldn't be putting this off, it was just Kelly Olsen, a woman she knew and had loved for over a year. Olsen was her friend and had offered her help should Alex ever need it. And boy did Alex need it. Swallowing her fear she dialed her ex's number. It rang a couple of times before a familiar voice came over the speaker.

"This is Kelly," she said.

"Hey, sorry to call you out of the blue Olsen but I need a favor," Alex said wanting to skip over any small talk.

"Of course Alex," she replied. "Whatever you need."

Alex sighed. She turned so her back was towards the door. She knew no one would overhear her but she felt better with the solid black wall in front of her. Her biggest downfall had been the inability to talk about her feelings. Maggie had always coaxed her into talking and Olsen had done so even more. But in that period of time where Alex had been by herself taking care of a scared four year old she had fallen back on her old habit of keeping things completely locked away inside of her. Though she had made progress to get back to where she had been beforehand she was still a long way from healed.

"I need to talk to you, things haven't been great recently. I can't get into details, at least not yet, but it's starting to take its toll on me."

"My door is always open to you Alex, I have time tomorrow if that works for you?"

"No, it'll have to wait until we've closed the case we're currently working on," Alex said. "The second it's done I'll come by."

There was a long silence between them one Alex recognized as Olsen trying to work through something in her head.

"Everything is okay with you and Maggie?"

Alex let out a breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding. Of course Kelly would go straight to that, she would never assume it was a problem between Alex and her daughter.

"We're fine. It has to do with Kel and a situation that just keeps getting worse," Alex said, knowing it was saying too much. "Like I said I'll fill you in once everything is no longer classified."

"I hope you do," Olsen said, Alex could hear her smile. "I have to go, I have an appointment soon. If you need anything, just call that goes for your daughter and Maggie as well. Take care Alex."

"You to Kelly," Alex said hanging up the phone.

Alex moved back to her desk, propping her feet on the top of it. She sunk further back into her chair, closing her eyes. If she was lucky she could get a nap in before anyone came to find her to tell her they had a lead. She hadn't been sleeping well and no matter how much Maggie tried she wasn't able to help Alex. One thing she had discovered after years as the Director of the DEO was that whenever she needed to get twenty minutes in shutting herself in her office was the best way to do it. She always managed to fall asleep in her desk chair, it usually left her feeling better, even if her neck hurt afterwards.

She let herself push everything out of her mind to focus on a singular thought. Something that didn't give her any stress and left her somewhat at peace. Slowly she began to drift off, part of her wishing she could fall asleep this easily in her own bed.

It was their first Thanksgiving together as an entire family. Their first time having the holiday at Kara and Lena's very large, very expensive pent house. Their first holiday with the Lena and Kara's daughter, Lori. And the first one since Maggie legally became Kelly's second adoptive mother. Alex was enjoying the moment, a temporary peace from the absolute mayhem her life usually was.

Maggie, true to her old self, was doing her damnedest to avoid holding Lori. She liked babies, they were cute but she didn't want to hold them. She felt uncomfortable with them, once they hit three or four, piece of cake, any younger and she basically ran. Alex was proud of her though, she had become a great mom to Kelly, having a deep bond with the girl Alex couldn't begin to understand. After their initial meeting Kelly had warmed up to Maggie almost immediately. She was basically hanging off of Maggie at the moment, not sure how to react to the newest addition to the ever growing Danvers family.

"Hey babe I left the beer in the car, I'm going to run down and get it," Maggie said.

"I'll come with you," Alex said. "Kel think you'll be okay with Grandpa J'onn?"

J'onn was in the living room with Kara and the rest. When he heard his name spoken he smiled over towards Kelly motioning to her to come join him. Alex was grateful for him. She knew he missed his people greatly, and his family even more so. But he had gladly fallen into the role of father figure to Alex and Kara as well as a grandfather for the two kids. Alex knew it was because he would never have grandkids of his own. She was just glad that he had made a family with them. He was a good man and deserved happiness.

Kelly went straight over to him, allowing him to lift her into his lap. Alex caught a glimpse of Maggie smiling. They had worked so hard to get Kelly comfortable with people and physical contact. She still shied away from it occasionally but most of the time she was okay with it. She'd come so far in the two years she had been with Alex and both of them were proud of her progress.

Alex allowed herself to be lead out of the apartment by Maggie, taking it slow as they headed down the hall way. Maggie took her hand, having always loved contact with Alex of any kind. Kelly was at the age she found their interactions gross, which lead Maggie to be more reserved when she was around. But in the privacy of the hallway those reservations went away.

"You didn't actually leave anything in the car did you?" Alex said when they reached the elevator.

"No, to be honest I just needed a minute," Maggie admitted. "Besides I think Kelly is doing fairly well. Ten minutes without us isn't going to be a problem."

Noticing her wife's concerned look Maggie smiled pulling Alex closer to her so she could wrap her arm around the taller woman's waist. "I was just getting overwhelmed." The elevator stopped allowing them to step off. Together they walked out of the lobby onto the sidewalk outside of the complex. Their car wasn't parked too far away and even though Maggie didn't actually need to grab anything from it she started towards it anyway.

"I'm proud of you Maggie, I don't know if I've said that to you lately," Alex said when they reached the car.

"Flattery Alex?" Maggie said with a smirk. "You're either after something or did something bad."

"Can't I just be proud of my wife?" Alex closed the distance between them pinning Maggie against the car.

"I love you," Maggie said reaching up to pull Alex down for a deep kiss.

They stayed like that for a moment that dragged on. Small moments like this were moments they loved to share. Sometimes it was difficult to steal a moment for themselves with Kelly but the moments they could they treasured. Though Alex had to say that this moment was a little cold compared to the others. November wind was cutting through their jackets, and the coolness of the car was getting to Maggie.

"I think outside was a bad idea," Alex said stepping away from Maggie. "It's freezing."

"It was, and we are definitely going back inside, in a minute," Maggie said. "I actually did need to check the car for something."

Alex looked confused but Maggie ignored it opening the back of her car and digging under the front seat. She could feel Alex's eyes on her giving her reason to smirk. Her wife was less than subtle but she wasn't complaining.

"What are you looking for?" Alex was closer now, peering over Maggie's back.

Maggie let out a small noise of triumph when her hand passed over what she was looking for. She straightened up, nearly colliding with Alex, the small stuffed animal in her hand. Alex looked between her wife and the toy in disbelief. That was why they were freezing their asses off.

"Kelly said something about Mr. Snippy having disappeared," Maggie said clearly proud of herself. She handed the stuffed scorpion to Alex. "I figured he was in the car."

Alex burst into a fit of laughter, slinging her arm around Maggie's shoulders. In all her life she never thought she would be here. She had never imagined she and Maggie would be married with a daughter and happy. She had given up on that years ago. But in some turn of fate Maggie came back and she stayed. She stayed and was helping Alex raise Kelly and it was all Alex could have asked for.

Alex was jolted out of her nap by her office door being thrown open. She sat up, keeping her feet on her desk, just about ready to kill whoever had just woken her up. What she found was Brainy standing just inside her office, having not bothered to knock. An annoying tendency he had never gotten over.

"Director," he paused noticing that he had disturbed her. "I apologize, but we found who wired the money to Mr. Marrison."

She dropped her feet to the floor so she could reach across her desk to take the file Brainy held out to her. "Let's hear it."

"You are not going to like what was found," he didn't bother to elaborate further.

That was what concerned Alex. Usually when they found a lead Brainy wouldn't be able to shut up about it. This time he was quiet apparently wanting Alex to see for herself. She skimmed over the pages in the file, her jaw tightening after each line she read. No she didn't like this at all.

"You have got to be fucking kidding me." Alex shut the file, tossing it hap hazardously onto her desk. "Are you positive about this?"

Brainy nodded, "it is unfortunate, but accurate information."

Alex cursed under her breath. This was not good, in fact this was probably the worst news she could have gotten.

"This changes things," she said rising from her desk. "For now this stays between you and me. I want to be on top of this. We have no idea how deep this corruption goes."

"What are you going to do?"

Alex set her jaw. She would have to go about this carefully. Their government was involved in this. She hoped it was only the one person, if it went any further they would be in the same mess they were with Lockwood. Her only option was to make the call and nip this at the bud before it got any worse.

"I'm going to make a call," she said. "Did you get a location on where Warden might be hiding?"

"We did, and old steel factory just outside of the city."

"Get a strike team together," Alex said. "I want them ready in an hour, it's time we take the fight to them."

"Right away," he said leaving her so he could carry out her orders.

She moved with a new found purpose. This was the first time since all of this started that they had gotten a lead. She wasn't about to let this opportunity pass. Warden would pay for the suffering she had put her family through, Alex would make sure of that.