"Hold still, won't you?"

"Ouch!" Suzaku jerked back, nearly causing Lelouch to drop the container in his hand. "That stings!"

"Don't be such a baby," Lelouch reprimanded. They were back in the guest room, their lunch having ended with Suzaku as Lelouch's patient while Kallen had taken on cleanup duty. Not that he had gotten much of a say—Lelouch had practically dragged him away by the collar, despite his complaints of being fine. Then pushed him down on the bed. Then commanded him to strip, to look forward, before finally subjecting Suzaku to his torture weapon of choice.

"What happened to the brave Knight of Zero?" Lelouch continued as he dipped two fingers into the ointment—why does it smell like gasoline? Suzaku wondered—and rubbed over the wounds on his shoulder, making him grimace.

"Your Knight of Zero had a Lancelot for protection," he said. "And Cecilé was much more gentle."

"I'm not Cecilé."

"I can tell."

"Hush," Lelouch snapped. He ran his hand down Suzaku's exposed side, caressing over the upper half of his body. Poking here, gliding there. It meant nothing, nothing more than a concerned friend looking after him. C.C. had done the same to him before; Kallen, too.

But that did not stop him from shivering under his touch.

"You're lucky to be alive," Lelouch muttered. "I can't believe you escaped two Knightmare Frames. How the hell did you manage to get out?"

"Don't you remember, Lelouch?" Suzaku said, wary to look back lest Lelouch whacked him over the head again. Stay still, Suzaku. Stop fidgeting, Suzaku. And he thought Cecilé had been uptight. "Your Geass?"

"What about it?"

"Your command to me?" he said. "It was what got me out."

There was a moment of silence. "What command?"

He ignored Lelouch's noise of exasperation as he looked back. "You don't remember?"

"I've given lots of commands, Suzaku," he said. "You can't expect me to remember all of them."

"I don't." The burn from his injuries was little compared to the fire building inside of him. "But this one was different."

"Oh? How so?"

"You forced me to live. It was why I became Zero. Had to repent for my crimes. All I wanted was to die, and you prevented me from having even that."

It would have been less painful if Lelouch's display of surprise was not sincere. "I...did I really?"

"You said it yourself," Suzaku said, trying not to strangle him. "You pointed out how I wished to die? And that I shouldn't throw myself into danger?"

Another moment. One that felt like eons, before Lelouch's eyes widened. "That's right," he mumbled. "When you were holding me hostage before Kamine Island. My Geass."

He really didn't remember. "Your memory…" he began, looking Lelouch up and down. The mark was shining in both eyes. The same that had cursed him to walk this path. "Is it still recovering?"

"It's fine," Lelouch brushed aside. "I'll be fine. It may take some time, but I promise not to let such things go again."

"You can't guarantee that."

"I can, and I will." He gave him a small shove. "Now, turn forward. I told you not to move!"

"Ugh." Though Suzaku made a face, he secretly held back a sigh of relief. Cornelia was after blood, C.C. could be dead—though he doubted it—and Zero was cornering them like rats in a cage. With everything looming over their heads, Lelouch had taken a turn for the worse: he looked like he hadn't slept in days, and he wouldn't stop shivering, despite the warm weather. But his memory seemed...decent, at least, and looking after Suzaku seemed to be good for him, his attention focused on something other than their impending doom. A good distraction from Nunnally, as well—something they both desperately needed.

"Say, Lelouch," Suzaku began, right as he felt something cold on the back of his neck, "What are you trying to get out of this plan?"

"Hm?" His hand stopped moving. "What are you going on about now?"

"You're going to visit Ashford, right?" he asked. "Why?"

"You already asked me this. Twice."

"Because you never answered."

"And I told you why I wouldn't." Once again, Lelouch had begun applying. Over his shoulder blades, down his back, leaving his skin tingling from more than just the ointment. "There's a reason it's called strategy, not open discussion."

It took effort not to turn around just to aggravate him. "Okay, but why can't you share your strategy?"

"That would threaten the element of surprise. The less information I share, the less likely it will leak to the masses."

"Right, but—"

"You were a general once," Lelouch said. "Don't act like you don't know this."

Suzaku sighed audibly. "Fine, Lelouch," he said, his fingers tapping against the bed frame. "Keep your secrets to yourself. Don't share with me. See if I care."

"I will, thank you." There was a jagged noise, loud enough to make Suzaku wince. "Just so you know, this might hurt a bit."

Lelouch had lied—the gauze slamming into his wounds almost made Suzaku bite his tongue in half. Luckily, it was not long before he had finished covering up his back, the gauze wrapped tighter than the schoolgirls around Gino's finger. "Wow," Suzaku breathed out as Lelouch sealed the last strip. "That was awful. It wasn't that painful when Kallen did it."

"It wouldn't be at all if you were more careful." Had Lelouch not been an almighty dictator, he would have made the perfect nanny. "Kallen said you told her that the salve was working wonders. Were you lying?"

His mind went blank. "Uh...no?"

"Tch." The blankets shifted as Lelouch moved up beside him, glaring down at him. "Stop trying to act like a hero all the time."

Suzaku frowned. "Well, one of us has to be."

"This isn't some fairy tale in a storybook. If, after everything we went through, you still believe in some silly concept of good versus evil, of white versus black, then you're dumber than I thought."

At one point the insult would have stung harsher than his wounds. Ignited Suzaku like a match to gasoline. Now, they flew past his head. It was just Lelouch. Albeit, a stressed Lelouch. "I didn't say it was," he pointed out. "Just that someone has to take the fall for your safety."

"You are not going to guilt trip—"

"I'm not. Relax, Lelouch." Kallen or her mother must have pulled up the blinds at some point; sunlight was pouring in, heating the back of his head. Casting Lelouch's anger under white light, his skin even more pallid. "You said it yourself: 'A king must lead so his subjects can follow'. And there's no way you can lead if someone isn't protecting you. That's what I've done to keep you safe. What I'm going to keep doing, if I have to."

"But—"

"You were the Emperor once." His tone held no harshness, but Lelouch's eyes widened nonetheless. "Don't act like you don't know this."

His words were like a needle, puncturing Lelouch as he deflated. He plopped back down onto the bed. A minute passed before he mumbled out, "But you didn't follow. You put yourself at risk. That's not..."

"Not what?"

But Lelouch could not bring himself to answer. Instead, he covered his face with his free hand. "Ugh. I'm sorry. I just...I don't want to lose you. The thought of it—"

"Hey. You haven't." Suzaku placed one hand on his shoulder, squeezing gently. "I'm right here, aren't I?"

"Yes. Yes, you're right." He blinked extra hard that time. His hand fell. "Turn towards me, won't you? We're almost done, I promise."

For a moment, Suzaku seemed to pause. No use hiding it now, he thought. Then he did as he was told, only to feel goosebumps as Lelouch gasped loudly, and whispered out in horror, "Suzaku."

"I'm fine." He attempted to cover the wound with his hand, as if to make it smaller somehow. "Really, I'm okay."

"No, you're not!" The jar of ointment fell onto the bed as Lelouch leaned forward, his fingers gliding over the gash. "What happened here? Doesn't this hurt?"

"No."

"You're lying again." He shook his head. "Dear God, can't you be honest for once? With something like this, it's a miracle you're still alive."

"Yes. Kallen told me that already." They were so worried about him. Why? He had an eternal command to live, and not much to live for. He should be the least of their worries. "I'll be okay. I'll live, Lelouch."

"Barely." His eyes remained fixed on his chest, his fingers aimlessly searching for the jar. "I can't believe you were injured so badly. That you hid this from me." The pain in his voice made it crack. "And you wonder why I worry about you."

"I hid it so you wouldn't worry."

"Does it look like that worked?" Irritation flashed in his eyes, battling against the concern. He took a deep breath. "Suzaku. Please. Don't hide these things from me. I can't worry about our next step and what you're silently enduring at the same time. The stress would kill me."

Suzaku's gaze fell. "Now you remember," he said softly, "how it feels to have secrets kept from you."

For the second time that day, Lelouch seemed at a loss of words. "Suzaku," he mumbled. "That's not..."

"Are you going to continue?" Suzaku interrupted. He held back a shiver. "I'm starting to get cold. We're almost done, right?"

A pause. Then, "Right. Right, we're almost done." He reached out, his fingers caressing over his chest. Thank goodness that the wound had avoided the area above his heart—Lelouch would have felt it racing for sure. "Suzaku, I'm sorry."

"It's alright." He shot him a weak smile. "I'm sorry I made things difficult."

"You did what you must. As knights must do." Lelouch's eyes fell half-closed, lost in thought as he finished up. "And as a leader, it is my duty to lead. No matter the fears holding me back."

Just like Nunnally. The thought struck a chord with him. How both siblings had been held back by every force imaginable, yet emerged as leaders of the world. Even broken free from their lineage to chase after peace. Perhaps noble blood could have noble intentions.

"Hm? What does Nunnally have to do with this?"

Suzaku jerked up. Had he said his thoughts aloud? "Oh," he began. "Uh, I was just thinking about how Nunnally was similar to you. As a leader."

"Is that so?" Another tearing noise as he drew out the gauze. "In what sense?"

"She understands what it means to have governance. Over many people." He clenched his teeth as Lelouch applied another strip; it felt like being scrubbed with sandpaper. "But she—ow!—knows that, as hard or scary as it may be, it is a leader's job to make hard decisions. Not to chase after power."

"That's a simple way of putting it." Lelouch gave one last pat for good measure, hard enough to make Suzaku reconsider whether he was actually dying after all. "Politics are twisted in every way. One right move, and something else falls apart. It's much easier to unite them under one concept."

"Isn't that what your parents tried to do?" Suzaku said. "Eliminate all differences?"

"Yeah. The ultimate act of narcissism." He scoffed. "They sought a world that served their own ideals, one where all human thought followed their every word."

"And you're no different?"

"The world I wanted was for Nunnally," he argued. "One that brought peace, not conformity. Made her happy."

"Hm." So C.C. had spoken the truth. Nunnally was but a guiding light to show him how. "And this plan of yours is for that goal?"

"No, my plan is—"

He caught himself. "Ah. So that's why. Trying to get me to reveal my hand, Suzaku?"

He gave a half-hearted shrug. "Worth a shot?"

"Nice try. I don't lose that easily."

"Oh?" Suzaku raised his eyebrows. "You think so? Then who won every time we encountered each other on the battlefield?"

"That's because you rode a demigod of a war machine," Lelouch said. "I'm talking strategy. No outside help. Who used to win at cards? At chess? At mahjong?"

"Hey, that's not fair! My first time playing was with you!"

"Not my problem."

"Well, what about tag? Or when we'd try catching fireflies? You couldn't run to save your life."

"You know damn well I have weak knees."

Suzaku did not retort, his mouth drawn into a firm line. It was always this way with Lelouch—he was nothing if not competitive. Either he would be the last one standing or he would drag everyone else down, so long as he came out the victor. Even now he was glaring back, the look in his eyes daring Suzaku to push further. Just like the day he had become Emperor, waiting for someone to challenge his might.

Suddenly, Suzaku burst out laughing. "W-Wow," he sputtered out, falling back onto the bed. "You...you really haven't changed at all. Have you?"

"What?" Lelouch said, bewildered. "What are you talking about now?"

"Lelouch—" Suzaku held a hand up to his chest as it heaved uncontrollably, aching with pain. "You should see the look on your face!"

Lelouch almost fell off the edge of the bed. "Huh?"

"You look—you look so serious!" He hiccuped. "Sorry. It's just, you look so mad. Over something so dumb."

The speed at which Lelouch went from pale to beet-red was astonishing. "I—you started this!"

"I did. I really did." At last, the remnants of his laughter began to fade. He shakily pushed himself back up. "Wow. I can't believe it. You're just as competitive as before."

"Hmph." Lelouch let out a huff, pouting as he looked away. "And you're as annoying as ever."

"Oh, come on," Suzaku prodded gently. "Don't act like you didn't miss this."

"I didn't miss this."

"You did. Come on, admit it."

"No."

"Still stubborn too, huh?" He shook his head, the grin taking over his cheeks. Can't admit when he's wrong, can he? With no response seemingly in waiting, he made to get up. "Fine. Guess I'll leave you to—"

"Suzaku. Wait." His hand had shot out, grabbing onto Suzaku's. "You're not ready to get up on your own."

"I'll be fine. I can handle—"

"You can not handle it." Weakly, Lelouch pulled him back down. "This is not a contest. Please."

The final word seemed to break his voice. Suzaku turned to him. His head was bowed, the threads of his hair dangling low, hiding his expression. "Lelouch?" he said. "Are you okay?"

"I am. But you're not." To Suzaku's surprise, he moved up closer. Drew up beside him, their hips almost touching. "Don't leave me yet."

He held his breath. "Lelouch?"

"I said, don't leave me yet." The stubbornness in his tone had melted into a softness, one that Suzaku had heard very few times before. Only with Nunnally, it seemed. "I'm tired of worrying. With you here in my sight, it makes things easier."

Makes what easier? Suzaku wondered. "You don't have to worry in the first place. I told you."

"But I do." He heard Lelouch sigh. Then, suddenly, saw him tilt over, his head leaning to the side, before it came to a stop against his shoulder. "And I don't want to. Not for now."

Something welled up in Suzaku's throat. "Does this make you happy?" he dared to ask. He was afraid of pushing too hard, of driving him away. Of revealing more than he needed to. Maybe, through some way like this, he could still make him happy. At a distance. Without having to resort to warfare or Geass or death. "Me being here?"

"For now." He chuckled. "You know, I can't believe I'm saying this, but you were right."

"About?"

"About us," he said. "I did miss this."

Suzaku was stunned into silence.It was likely nothing important, nothing more than a concerned friend looking after another friend. Lelouch must have also missed C.C.; Kallen, too.

But that did not stop him from pulling Lelouch closer, one arm wrapped around his shoulder. "I missed this, too," he said softly.

"Hm." Lelouch leaned into him, watching the gray of the buildings outside the window. "Now you listen to me."

"Someone has to look after you."

"Says the one who gets into danger."

"Yes. For you." Off of Lelouch's hair came the scent of smoke and sandalwood. Familiar. Subtle. The same as that of the boy he had found on his doorstep, holding his blinded sister. "Because I have to protect you."

"I see." Lelouch placed one hand on his exposed chest. "A knight and his Emperor. Right, Suzaku?"

More than just that. "Yes, Your Majesty."

A knock on the door made Suzaku jump. "Hello?" he heard Kallen call out. "Are you both finished in there?"

His cheeks burned more than the sun on his skin. "Uh, hold on Kallen—"

"Yes, we are," Lelouch interrupted lazily. Not moving. Still cradled on his shoulder, his hand hovering near his heart. "Come in, Kallen."

Suzaku barely had time to hiss out "Lelouch!" and push himself away before the door swung open, a curious Kallen making her way in. Her expression changed as her gaze fell on them. Lelouch, only starting to sit up straight. Suzaku, trying not to seem out of place (and failing spectacularly). "What's going on?" she asked, staring back and forth.

"Nothing," Lelouch said. He raised his hand, beckoning her forward. "Come join us, Kallen. We were just talking about who would win in a game of chess."

"Well, you, obviously," she said. "But Suzaku has you beat in everything else. Why is this even a question?"

Off to the side, Suzaku could not help but mutter told you so as Kallen approached them, her hands held behind her back. "Lelouch," she began, her expression darkening ever-so-slightly, "I have something for you."

He leaned forward. "What is it?"

"This." She held out her hand. In her palm was a tiny black box. "You'll need it for later."

"And this is?"

"Your contacts," she said, watching him as he removed the lid. Resting inside were two discs of purple. "For later today. And whenever you're out in public."

He lifted them on the tips of his fingers. "I see," he said, rotating them slowly, watching them catch the sunlight. "Where did you get this? I thought they belonged to C.C.."

"They do," Kallen said. "She wanted me to give them to you when the time was right."

"And that time is now?"

"Yes. Don't forget your promise to me." She made to leave the room. "We leave in a few hours. Behave yourself, okay?"

"Wait. Kallen." Lelouch tossed the box aside. Suzaku could see the Geass flashing, desperately trying to avoid from being smothered. "Thank you for this."

"You can thank me by keeping true to your word," she said, without turning back. With one hand, she opened the door. Then stopped. "Put them on soon, okay? I miss your old eyes."

He blinked. "My old eyes?"

"Yeah. They were really pretty."

"Oh." In one fluid motion, he slid his fingers over his eyes. "You mean like this?"

Hesitantly, she turned around. There was concern on her face, but it quickly vanished into recognition. Relief. As warm as the feeling in Suzaku's chest from where Lelouch had touched him. "There we go. That's the Lelouch I know."

"What do you mean?" Lelouch said, puzzled yet again. "It's just contacts."

"No, it's more than that. It's you."

"But I'm still me. Is this a joke?"

"No. I meant—" She tossed her head back. "Ugh. You know what? Never mind. Forget I said anything."

And she was gone before Lelouch could ask, the door slamming shut behind her. He lowered his hand, and looked over at Suzaku, the sunlight highlighting his widened eyes. "Did I say something wrong?"

Suzaku shook his head. And he thought he was the awkward one. "You definitely haven't changed at all," he said as he wrapped Lelouch in a side hug, drawing him in close. "Have you, Lelouch?"