Waiting On The Edge
The four of them crept through the dark garden, Lourdes glancing involuntarily up at the dimly lit window where her father and Madison were, Daniel and his family now installed in Alicia's bedroom. She had reluctantly shut Timmy up in her father's small study, promising to patch him up as soon as she came back, Lourdes then leaving, ignoring the crash of books and papers that followed in her wake, Timmy immediately causing chaos.
As they approached the fence that divided their property from the Tran residence next door, Chris's hand found Lourdes's, pressing his sweating palm against hers, Lourdes giving his fingers a swift squeeze. Despite everything, he was her brother, protecting her as she protected him, Lourdes involuntarily remembering the flash of the razor as he brought it down on one of her attackers, sinking it into the stranger's flesh.
Still shaking at the memory, she pulled Chris's hoodie closer around her, Chris gripping her hand like grim death now, reminding her of the frightened little boy he'd once been. They were in this together now, Chris wordlessly admitting he had been wrong, now reluctantly accepting what he was seeing. The siblings staggered onwards, Alicia just up ahead, Nick leading the way. This wasn't their world anymore, but there was no time to find their place in it, to forge a way forwards; they only had literal heartbeats to keep their heads above water, to stay one step ahead of the current that threatened to drag them under.
"Stay close," Nick flung at all three of them over his shoulder, "and keep quiet." Without another word, he awkwardly scaled the trashcans, then he was over the fence, disappearing from sight. Hesitating, Alicia followed him, hauling herself upwards with some difficulty. Then she too was gone, her long brown hair billowing out behind her. Taking a deep breath, Chris clambered up, before swinging himself over the side of the fence, Lourdes following, dropping like a cat onto the crazy paving path beyond, framed by the wooden maze-like fruit cage clumsily constructed by Patrick Tran, the structure looming out of the darkness like a large animal.
"Shouldn't we have brought weapons?" Alicia hissed as Nick dusted himself down, Chris and Lourdes standing side by side again, both suddenly looking very young, throwing the familial resemblance between them into relief.
"Keep up, Lish," Nick snapped. "We're here for said weapon."
"Yeah, whatever, Monopoly Man," Lourdes muttered. "Maybe we should have brought a shoe along."
"You still freaking out over that?" Nick retorted. "You sure know how to pick a time and place to throw a hissy fit" -
- "We were out there," Lourdes spat, striding over to him, "and you know exactly what's out there, yet you just hid in the house, playing bloody board games!"
"Alright, alright, I acted like a flake," Nick said, flinging up his hands, "and I'm sorry, okay? So can we now focus on the matter at hand" -
- "It's that hoary old chestnut of us versus them, isn't it?" Lourdes cut across him, mouth a sarcastic moue. "As soon as the shit hits the fan, you, Madison and Alicia batten down the hatches, and screw the rest of us who aren't called Clark" -
- "Hey, we're in this together," Alicia interrupted angrily, "I mean, we're all here, aren't we?"
"Yeah, but you weren't there for opening night, were you?" Lourdes said, becoming hysterical, her dark eyes wild. "There was nearly one great big gang-b" -
- "Lourdes!" Chris cried, lunging forwards, grabbing her arm, only for Lourdes to violently shake him off. "Goddamn don't" -
- "You missed the strip-show, guys," Lourdes laughed manically, tears falling thick and fast down her face, Nick and Alicia staring at her in horror as the realization of her meaning sunk in. "Fucking free for all" -
- "Lourdes," Nick said helplessly, trying to take her in his arms, his feeble fingers fumbling to get a grip on the fabric of her hoodie, "I'm – I'm sorry – I – I didn't know" -
- "Don't fucking touch me!" Lourdes snapped, tearing herself out of his hold.
"Okay, fine, I won't!" Nick snapped back, hands falling uselessly to his sides. "Keep your goddamn hair on!"
"Screw you!" Lourdes spat, wiping her eyes with the inside of her wrists. "Screw your fucking junkie ass!"
"Well, screw you too, missie!"
"God, you're an asshole, Clark," Chris said in disbelief, stepping in front of Lourdes, clenching his fists as he moved, nostrils flaring, "you've really outdone yourself tonight" -
- "Break it up, guys!" Alicia intervened, wading inbetween them all, Chris looking like he was going to punch Nick. "We're here for the shotgun, so we get said shotgun, and then we go, right?"
"That's what I've been saying all along," Nick said abruptly, before limping ahead, head bowed. But as he moved, he suddenly punched one of the wooden posts in passing, making Lourdes flinch, his anger almost alien, Lourdes never having seen him lose control like that before. Knowing Nick better than anyone, Alicia gently touched Lourdes's elbow, silently signaling her to follow, Chris hesitating before taking his sister's hand again, leading her onwards towards the unknown.
In silence, they then followed Nick down the crazy paving path before finally emerging from the entrance of the fruit cage, glad to have escaped its claustrophobic confines, the rough wood catching on their clothes, feeling like grasping hands, making Lourdes flinch afresh. Without warning, Nick suddenly darted towards the front door of the Tran residence, tripping over a plant-pot as he ran across the patio, almost breaking his neck. On reflex, Alicia rushed after him, even as she was as ever always too late to stop his fall, but Nick surprisingly steadied himself, racing ahead and up the steps, dropping to his knees and pulling back the well-worn welcome mat, revealing a key.
"Always said the old lady lacked imagination," Nick said cruelly, staggering to his feet, clutching the key like a trophy.
"Nick!" Alicia snapped, insulted by his insult. Like Nick, Alicia had known the Tran family since she was a child; both siblings had spent a lot of time with Susan Tran, who had often minded them whilst Madison was at work, but it was Alicia who was closest to Susan, Alicia classing the old woman as family.
"Yeah, yeah, we all know you're sweet Sue's shining little star," Nick muttered as he slid the key into the lock, old grudges rising to the surface. He could unleash his charm on anyone and overwhelm them into submission, anyone but Susan Tran, who stood all of barely four feet eleven and would stare him down, saying he was a bad boy, a phrase oft repeated over the years.
"Shut up, Nick," Alicia said through gritted teeth as Chris and Lourdes came up the steps, all three then following Nick into the house, all holding their breath as they crossed the threshold. As they moved, Nick snatching up a tartan-patterned torch from the table-top, switching it on with a loud click, Alicia suddenly called out, "Susan! Patrick? It's Alicia!" making the others start violently.
"Put a sock in it, Lish!" Nick snapped, brandishing the torch at her. "You wanna wake the dead!?"
"Ha-ha," Chris said sarcastically, "you're really killing me here, Clark."
Nick just shot him a dirty look before leading the way again, a now silent Alicia reluctantly following, Chris and Lourdes bringing up the rear, glancing nervously around them as they went, only for the power to return, all the lights suddenly flickering on, making them all, even Alicia this time, jump again. "Susan?" Nick called out hesitantly, contradicting his earlier edict. "You kicking about? It's me, Nick, your bad boy!"
"That doesn't sound right," Chris muttered, making Nick glare at him again. "Sounds downright weird."
"It's not weird," Nick retorted, "it's just something she calls me, okay?"
"What, are you her plaything?" Chris flung back. "Her towering toyboy or some freaky shit like that?"
"Can it, okay?" Alicia snapped, rounding on them both. "If anyone else disses Susan, I'll personally make sure you're very, extremely sorry for it, yeah?"
"Okay, okay," Nick said, holding his hand up, the other holding the torch aloft, "your wish is so not our command."
Alicia just tossed her hair back, before leading the way this time, calling out to Susan again, blindly believing her to be in the building, Lourdes hanging back, suspecting nobody was home, Alicia chasing ghosts.
"Susan's not here," Lourdes said, giving voice to her thoughts, making Alicia glance over her shoulder.
"You don't know that," Alicia said coldly, "so butt out." She strode ahead, Nick glancing at Lourdes as he followed his sister, but Lourdes avoided his questioning gaze, averting her eyes from his. They crept through the hall, bypassing the stairs leading into the basement, before going into the dark living room.
Swearing, Chris tried to turn the lights on, but nothing happened, the bulbs obviously blown, Nick throwing Alicia his torch instead, signalling for her to hold it as he started searching for the shotgun. He tore through cupboards and overturned furniture, emptying wicker baskets and storage boxes, Alicia watching aghast even as she guided him through the destruction, Chris standing sullenly in the doorway, Lourdes picking at her nails, her lower lip trembling.
"Voila!" Nick bellowed triumphantly, pulling out from behind the sofa an oblong bundle clumsily wrapped up in brown tape and canvas cloth. "I knew it was here somewhere!"
"You're the man, Clark," Chris said, rolling his eyes, "now can we go?"
"Not until we find the shells for the shotgun," Nick said, addressing Chris as if he was an imbecile, "and by shells, I don't mean she-sells-seashells-on-the-sea-shore. I'm talking about ammunition, implements of war" -
- "I'll find the shells," Alicia cut across him, handing Chris the torch, effectively ending the argument. As the others searched for the shells, Lourdes drifted over to the window, dimly aware of a dog barking in the distance, not Timmy, but another dog, its bark a dull droning whine making the hairs stand up at the back of her neck. A flash of movement made her head snap up, only to see several figures staggering down the road, going past the drive of Madison's house.
"What is it?" Nick said, instantly alert, rushing over to the window.
Wordlessly, Lourdes pointed, Nick grabbing the sill for support as one of the figures turned into Madison's driveway, heading straight for the house.
Beholden now I find myself awake
Waiting on the edge again…