Oh Reindeer

by mariescullen

After returning to her hometown for winter break, Bella Swan is unhappy to find her next-door neighbor and ex, Edward Cullen home as well. When Bella stumbles upon a lost baby reindeer in the woods just a few days before Christmas, she confides in Edward to help her find its way home. AU/AH - 2x daily updates (EPOV and BPOV until xmas)

15. Chapter 15

Thanks to Fran for beta'ing. Thanks to Mykaela and Gabby for pre-reading.

15.

Bella

The clock ticked above me as I stared at the Christmas tree. A few more clicks and the chimes sound, playing Joy to the World in a cacophony of bells.

I thought I knew pain. I thought I knew suffering. I thought my cracked heart had a sour taste from a nasty serving of life.

But I didn't.

This…this was pain.

In the treehouse, the first time, my heart had broken into so many pieces. But now? The shards were sharp; cutting and scattered on the floor like a shattered mirror.

It was raw. It was not my own.

And I couldn't stop it.

I let her down too.

The words tore into me like a knife.

Seeing Edward, my best friend, my soul mate, curled up in a chair torn between mourning his sister's fate and choking himself with guilt, believing it was he who got her here.

I always knew I loved him; I just didn't know how deep that love could go. I wasn't sure how much could I take; how long could I stay by his side. Would I ever again be able to trust him after he had hurt me so much?

But now I knew.

I knew it would stop at nothing—no crack was too deep.

We were wrapped up in one another. I let him cry until he drifted to sleep. But it didn't last long. He woke up within an hour.

I told him his sister needed him, and I promised to bring coffee back to him soon.

The truth was, I need a moment to myself.

I just wish…I could go back to the beginning.

… Before we met Cocoa.

… Before Alice fell from the treehouse.

… Before I could ever see the one thing that would cause me more pain than Edward breaking my heart.

Seeing him break his own.

I grasped the bell in my pocket.

Was magic real? Could I use it to fix this?

I shook the bell violently, willing it to chime. Tears flowed down my face, the lights on the Christmas tree blurring together in a watercolor mass of color.

"I wish, I wish, with all my heart…we could go back to the start."

The tinkle of the bell quietly sounded throughout the room. I shook it as many times I could muster, before dropping it to the floor.

That's it for the regular chapters!

Epilogue posted tomorrow!

See you tomorrow,

Sarah