Part 15 - A Cruel Angel's Noodle Incident

It was the late afternoon as Misato and the three pilots rode the train back into the city. It'd been quite a day for them: in enacting a plan of Misato's that had very, very low odds, Shinji, Asuka and Rei were able to defeat Sahaquiel, the 10th Angel. Misato had promised them a steak dinner should they make it out of the battle alive, which they did.

Asuka: "Now you're going to have to keep your promise."

Misato [reassuringly]: "Of course! I withdrew a fortune, so I can even handle a full-course dinner." Though it's before payday...

Asuka: "Relax, Misato, we know the state of your wallet. You can take it easy."

Misato was surprised by Asuka's remark.

Asuka: "I gave it some thought, and there's gonna be a slight change in our dinner plans. We're gonna go the ramen route tonight."

Misato [more surprised]: "Why ramen?"

Asuka: "Hikari recommended this place that just popped up recently. She's been going there."

Shinji: "Kensuke and Toji too. Kensuke especially, he's always raving about it. According to him, you will be stunned."

Misato [skeptical]: "Stunned by ramen?"

Asuka: "You can't eat this ramen standing up, your knees'll buckle. Hikari's own words."

Misato: "Huh. Ramen that'll bring you to your knees. Go on..."

Shinji: "There's only one catch-the guy who runs the place is a little temperamental, especially about the ordering procedure. People secretly call him the Ramen Shogun."

Misato raised one eyebrow at hearing this.

Misato: "Why? What happens if you don't order the right way?"

Asuka [slight serious expression on her face]: "He yells and you don't get your ramen."

Misato [surprised]: "What?"

By the time she said that, the quartet's train had reached the station and they all got off. They then started walking in the direction of the ramen stand Shinji and Asuka had been talking about. They'd just seen it coming up as they explained the ordering procedure to Misato and Rei, as it'd been described to them by their friends.

Asuka: "Just follow the ordering procedure and you'll be fine."

Shinji [slightly apprehensive]: "All right, all right, let's-let's go over it again, just to be safe."

Asuka [a bit nervous]: "All right. As you walk in the place, move immediately to your left."

Misato: "What?"

Asuka: "The main thing is to keep the line moving."

Shinji: "Right. So, you hold out your money, speak your ramen order in a loud, clear voice, step to the left, and receive it."

Asuka: "Right. The key is to not embellish on your order. No extraneous comments, no questions, not even a compliment."

Misato [skeptical and sarcastic]: "Ooh, oh my, I'm SO scared!"

Shinji and Asuka just eyed their guardian with serious looks. Rei remained neutral, absorbing every bit of the conversation as they went along. Finally they reached the place.

Misato [surprised]: "WOW. The line's huge..."

Asuka: "According to Hikari, it's like this all the time."

The quartet managed to find places in the line, which soon began moving along. Rei was the first out of the four of them as she approached the counter, where the 'Ramen Shogun' himself stood stern, with a grim expression on his mustached face, much like that of his moniker.

Rei: "Garlic ramen. No roast pork."

She then handed him some of the money given to her by Misato and moved to the cash register to await her order. Asuka stepped up next, looking very calm and collected as she approached.

Asuka: "Shark fin ramen. WITH roast pork. Large."

Asuka then handed him the money as he nodded, and she then slid to her left to await her order.

Shinji was up next, and he still looked a bit nervous. He quickly gave his order, handed the Ramen Shogun the money, and then slid to the left to await his dish. When he was handed the container, he opened the lid and noticed something was off.

"Uh, excuse me?" he started to ask.

"Baka," Asuka muttered to herself as she face-palmed, knowing Shinji was in for it now.

"I, uh, I didn't get any moyashi," he said to the Ramen Shogun.

"Just forget it, baka, let it go..." Asuka implored to Shinji. Unfortunately, she was too late.

"Moyashi-218.57 yen extra," the Ramen Shogun sternly replied.

"What?" Shinji said startlingly, "But everyone before me got moyashi free!"

"You want moyashi?" the Shogun asked.

"Yes, please," Shinji meekly replied.

"327.85 yen!" the Shogun barked.

"WHAT?" Shinji sputtered out.

"NO RAMEN FOR YOU!" the Shogun barked as he snapped his fingers. On hearing that signal, the cashier took Shinji's ramen back and handed him back the money. Misato, witnessing the whole thing, was speechless. Before she could say anything to object to the Shogun's treatment of Shinji, Rei held her back, quietly shaking her head. Misato grumbled in response, and proceeded to just go with the flow, ordering a ramen like Shinji's but large enough for her to split with him. Silently, she vowed that she'd get even with this "Ramen Shogun" at some point.

The next day at NERV HQ, Misato was chatting with Ritsuko and the techs about what'd happened. Kaji passed by them at one point in their conversation.

Misato [suspicious]: "And just where are you off to?"

Kaji [sloppy-grinned]: "What, little old me? Just goin' topside to get some lunch. And right now, I feel like a bowl of muligatawny would hit the spot."

Misato [confused]: "Muliga-wha?"

Kaji: "Muligatawny. It's an Indian soup. The one I'm after in particular is simmered to perfection by one of the great culinary artisans of our time."

Shigeru: "You talking about the Ramen Shogun?"

Misato: "He does more than ramen?"

Makoto: "Oh yeah. Ramen or soup, his is the stuff I swear by."

Maya: "Ditto for me."

Ritsuko: "Same here."

Misato [dumbstruck]: "Are you kidding? The guy shouldn't be in business, the way he treats customers."

Kaji: "What's your beef with him?"

Misato: "I took the kids there yesterday as a reward for beating the 10th Angel. Going there was even Asuka and Shinji's idea, since their friends raved about it. Then they told me about the 'system' that runs the place. It actually made Asuka cautious, something I've never known her to be. Anyway, even after going over the 'ordering procedure', Shinji made one little slip-up and got his order taken away! I wound up getting a large of what he would've had and shared it with him. Still, it was just an honest mistake, why'd the guy have to be so harsh?"

The others stared at Misato, which started to unnerve the ops director of NERV a bit.

Ritsuko: "They did warn you about what you were getting into."

Misato: "Rits, do you hear yourself right now?"

Kaji: "Take it easy, Katsuragi. Like it or not, that's what comes from living under a Shogunate."

At that, the three techs nodded in affirmation.

Misato [unconvinced]: "Easy for you to say. But one of these days, if I have anything to say about it, that guy is gonna get his."

On hearing that, the others got a bit nervous.

Ritsuko: "Trust me, Misato, you really don't want to mess with the guy. Look at it this way-Commander Ikari, of all people, doesn't scare easily, but of all the people in the world who inspire fear in him, it's not the Committee. It's the Ramen Shogun."

Misato: "Well, I'm not scared of him. After all, the Shogunate did give way to the Meiji..."

A few days later, Misato, on her way home from the Geofront one day, found an old armoire out on the curb that someone was giving away for free. Feeling that her apartment could use a bit of sprucing up, she found a couple of guys to help her get it home and had it set up in an unoccupied space in her living room. Upon inspecting the drawers, she made an unexpected discovery after finding several sheets of paper within one of them. Perusing them further, she made an even greater discovery: the papers, it turned out, were ramen recipes. And not just anyone's-they were the Ramen Shogun's. The armoire had, in fact, been originally his. It was then Misato grinned as an idea began forming...

The following day, she waltzed into the ramen stand and asked to speak to the Shogun in private. Once out of the sight of the staff and customers, Misato made the Shogun an offer: he eases up with his 'customer service', and she won't leave his recipes with any of his competition. That, and he'd provide Shinji a free bowl of ramen the next time she brought him in, which would be the day after today. Having reached an agreement, the Shogun reluctantly conceded defeat to NERV's chief tactical officer as they shook on it. He knew right then and there that Misato Katsuragi was a woman not to be trifled with. For if he ever reneged even the tiniest bit on their 'treaty', he knew what the next words to come out of her mouth would be:

"No more ramen for you."

END Part 15.

**Author's Note(s)**

I always knew trying to riff on "The Soup Nazi" was going to be difficult. I hope I did an okay job with a slightly abridged homage in the end.