"Riku," Jasmine began sternly. When he shifted his gaze away from her, Jasmine took a step to the left to look him in the eye again. Only this time, she gently held his chin to prevent him from looking away again. "Stop taking this out on yourself," she told him. "I know it takes time, but you're not even giving yourself an inch to move on."
"It's not that I'm not trying," Riku explained, finding it hard to process his thoughts.
Jasmine dropped her hand and took a step away from Riku, unsure of what to say in this situation to make things better.
Then again, she knew that this was a struggle within Riku. He was the only one who could heal himself. And as much as she hated admitting it, there was nothing she could do, or say, that could make him move forward. Or on…
"We don't have to see each other if it makes you this uncomfortable," Jasmine said quietly.
Riku seemed shocked by Jasmine's proposal and immediately tensed up. "Don't you think that's a bit extreme?"
"The only reason why I'm asking that is because we seem to be forcing something that isn't working," Jasmine explained. "Let's face it: things will never be a hundred percent like they used to be. It's not gonna happen. I don't care how many times Sora pushes us together, or how much everyone tells us to work it out, if we both can't find ways to make this work – whatever the hell we're doing – then we should stop altogether."
"That can't be it," Ven said as he handed Jasmine her coffee.
The pair met up at a café near their apartment building the day after the paopu festival. While Ventus was his usual cheerful self, Jasmine was a bit more disheveled than normal. On a regular day, Jasmine was up before eight in the morning and today, she was barely conscious by noon. Ventus damn-near had to drag her out of bed, and even still, she was wearing part of her sleepwear with her pajama bottoms and a weathered t-shirt he was sure she worked out in.
Jasmine set her coffee down at their small table and rubbed her eyes profusely. "What do you mean 'that can't be it', Ven?" She plopped down in her chair and groaned, feeling as if she'd been hit by a bus and lived.
Ven studied Jasmine's face. She was definitely a little worse for wear. He sighed heavily, already knowing why she was so out of it. "You should leave that new strain alone. The doctors at the lab are still testing out the paopu."
She groaned before steadily downing a good portion of her coffee. As usual, Ven was right.
Jasmine was warned that this new strain the doctors at SOLDIER had developed was still a bit unstable but, of course, she had to try it out due to its calming properties. However, the comedown was much worse than she expected, making for a rather rough night of sleep.
"Even so," Jasmine continued, looking to meet Ventus' gaze, "nothing happened last night."
Ventus said slowly, "I didn't hear from you for a while. I was worried."
While she was initially touched by Ven's concern, she was a bit tense from her conversation with Riku late last night. "I could barely type by the time everything kicked in. I'm lucky I was even able to have a coherent conversation with Riku at all."
"Just making sure," Ventus said with a lighthearted chuckle, "I just want to prepare myself for if I have to give you back."
Jasmine slyly kicked Ventus' shin under the table, making him groan.
"I'm just kidding!" He said through gritted teeth.
"No, you're not," she said flatly.
Ventus took a sip of his tea and looked around the café. It was almost empty save for a couple sitting in the back, much too far out of range to hear anything.
A mischievous smirk tugged at the corners of Ven's lips and he scooted his chair so that he was close to her. While Jasmine was finishing off her coffee, he slipped his hand under the table giving her upper thigh a tight squeeze, making her jump ever so slightly.
"You're right," he admitted. Then he lowered his voice, "I'm not kidding. I'm not ready to let you go just yet."
Jasmine's cheeks lit up in embarrassment. Even though Ventus did flirt with her in public on a frequent and regular basis, it was always a surprise to her. "Aren't you worried about someone catching us? Doesn't the sneaking around ever bother you?"
"Not at all," Ventus replied. With his free hand, he reached for his tea and finished it off before gently setting the ceramic mug back on the table. "Let's be real: if SOLDIER finds out, it won't be the end of the world. The only people from SOLDIER who might take issue with this is Noctis and his team. And what are they gonna do? Nothing."
As much as she hated to admit it, Ventus was right. While SOLDIER talked a good game about romantic relationships within the organization, there were too many examples of couples floating out in the open for anyone to deny.
"The only ones I think you're sincerely worried about, are your friends because of the situation with you and Riku," Ventus added matter-of-factly.
Just then, a thought crossed Jasmine's mind. "Aren't you worried about Roxas finding out? He is your cousin after all."
Ven leaned back but still maintained his grip on Jasmine's thigh, albeit loosening it slightly. "Do I think about it? Yeah. But am I worried? No."
Jasmine seemed genuinely surprised by Ven's answer. "Why's that?"
"If Roxas finds out, then he finds out. The only issue I see is if he runs off and tells everyone else, which, I honestly don't think he'll do."
Jasmine found this hard to believe. Thinking back on their high school days, she remembered Roxas to be more on the jealous side.
Ven cleared his throat and his gaze softened to a more rueful one. Jasmine immediately knew that he was going to drop something heavy on her.
"Can I be honest with you, Jasmine?"
She nodded her head, feeling an ache in the pit of her stomach.
"Roxas moved on," he deadpanned. "I think he'll always value you guys' past and friendship – which I do think you should work on – but once Roxas is pretty much done. And If I'm being REALLY honest, he wouldn't have started dating again unless one: he knew that it was really over between you guys, two: if he wasn't personally ready to see what else is out there."
"So, basically what you're saying, is that I'm the one making a bigger deal out of it than it really is," Jasmine said as she exhaled.
One of the things that Jasmine appreciated about Ven was the fact that he never sugarcoated anything with her. Sure, he could be gentle with delivering harsh facts, but he was always straightforward and to the point, something she desperately needed at times.
"Yeah," Ven said with a rueful smile. "All that said, it might be a little weird at first IF he found out, but what's there to say? We're not actually dating so it has way less weight than if we were in a committed relationship. And even if we did date, I'm sure he'd accept it gracefully. Now," Ven cleared his throat loudly and pulled back from Jasmine, the curiosity on his face undeniable. "What happened with Riku?"
While Jasmine remained completely composed on the outside, inwardly she was a utter and complete confused complete mess.
"YOU TOLD HER THAT?" Sora yelled as he dropped the basketball he was holding.
"Uh huh," Riku replied simply as scanned over the basketball court, hoping no one else could listen in on their conversation.
Sora, unable to process what had occurred the previous night, plopped down on the concrete underneath him. "Wow. I sure picked the worst time to get sick," he lamented.
Riku chuckled and snatched up their basketball, taking a seat next to his best friend. "You shouldn't have eaten too much," he told Sora. "And I think you grabbed the alcoholic drink by mistake."
Sora groaned loudly. Everything was going so perfectly yesterday at the festival. The three of them were having such a good time, and then, after eating too much and possibly grabbing wrong drink, Sora ended up being taken home by Riku and Jasmine. Sora knew that they didn't return to the festival, but he didn't know what happened to the pair once they dropped him off.
"I'm surprised she didn't slap you," Sora said quietly, recalling how bad Jasmine's temper could be at times.
Riku cracked a smile. "I was shocked too. But either way I was honest."
Flashback
If there was one thing Riku was confident on in this moment in time, it was that he wasn't the only one who was struggling.
During the entirety of their time at the festival, Jasmine was cool, confident and seemingly unbothered by being around Riku despite their turbulent past. But something about her throughout the day and night seemed…fake.
Even when she came back from her mission, Jasmine was not this calm. It didn't make sense.
While he thought it would be arrogant to say that if he was struggling, she must be struggling as well, Riku knew from Naminé that Jasmine was still trying to sort out her emotions towards their situation too.
Riku looked at Jasmine once she'd finished speaking and smirked from ear to ear.
A look of disbelief painted her face and Jasmine immediately went on the defensive. "Why are you looking at me like that? Do you think this is funny?"
Riku chuckled and took a step closer to Jasmine and leaned forward so that their faces were almost touching. He took a quick sniff and, upon recognizing a vaguely familiar scent. He first came across the smell from his first year at university and he could recognize it almost anywhere. Even though it was almost gone, the faint scent of paopu was still lingering on Jasmine's lips.
"I just never took you for the paopu type," he said simply.
Jasmine's face twisted from an expression of disbelief, to genuine annoyance. She knew that this particular batch was strong to counter her severe anxiety, but she didn't think that anyone could smell it on her.
"I have anxiety," she replied, her disgust still present. "I'm going through some stuff right now. There's nothing wrong with what I'm doing. It's better than me drinking like I did back in high school."
"You are," Riku said. "And I completely get it. The stuff you deal with are things that most of us will never understand." He offered her a rueful smile. "You don't have to defend yourself, Faye. Not with me anyway."
Jasmine's disgust quickly faded and she went inward into herself.
It was true. For the majority of their friendship and even relationship (outside of their feud), Jasmine knew that Riku never judged her for her actions. It was one of the things that she appreciated about him. Even if he made a joke here and there, she knew deep down that he accepted her for who she was and was there to support her.
Just then, it hit her…
While she was accusing Riku of being distant and standoffish, she was no better by putting up a facade fueled by paopu to cover her nerves. In fact, she was worse than he was.
At least Riku was sober.
"I know," Jasmine said finally, crossing her arms over her chest as if she were protecting herself. "It'll take some time though…"
The pair allowed a silence to fill the air, the both of them using the silence to come up with a proper response.
"I can move slow," Riku said gently. "I think we can make it work."
For the first time, Jasmine actually felt relief in regard to her situation with Riku. Until this point, everything had felt forced…like they HAD to be back to normal right out the gate.
It didn't mean that she didn't feel uneasy about it (given her history with Riku in addition to her latest "complication" with Ventus) but this time around she didn't feel the same internal resistance.
"I just want to move forward," Jasmine said finally. "I miss everyone and I'm tired of it being awkward."
Riku shoved his hands in his pockets and gave Jasmine a long, hard stare. His expression was unreadable which threw her off slightly.
Clearly and confidently, Riku said, "Faye, I want you to be happy whether you and I end up together or not."
Jasmine felt her heart drop in that moment, and then race shortly after. This was NOT the kind of conversation she expected to be having with Riku. Buried deep, deep down, Jasmine still hoped (or at least imagined in the back of her head) being with Riku. Perhaps it was because she was still so young and hadn't dated much, but something inside her told her that at the end of the day she would be with Riku. Maybe it was his promise of forever with the proposal or their unspoken commitment to each other, but to hear Riku even speak it into existence was jarring for her to say the least.
"Can we just try to have fun together again? A clean slate? I know our history and we shouldn't throw it away completely, but I think we should give it a real shot. What do you say?"
Riku's demeanor changed and his lips pulled into his infamous smirk. He extended his hand for her to take and waited.
Jasmine felt the blood rush to her face and she swore internally.
She hated the fact that she loved him so much and that he seemed to still have this power over her even years later. While she remained motionless, Jasmine wanted nothing more than to fly into his arms. What came after, she wouldn't care.
But Jasmine knew better and restrained herself.
"Can I take you home?"
Jasmine exhaled and finally reached for his hand, her heart swelling when their hands touched. She looked into his eyes, lost once again in his perfect blues and managed a small smile. "Let's go."
End of Flashback
"And THEN what happened?" Sora asked excitedly, hanging onto Riku's words like his life depended on it.
Riku smirked. "I took her home. End of story."
Deflated, Sora groaned loudly. "C'mon Riku! That tells me nothing!"
Riku shrugged his shoulders. "I told you everything," he countered. "Nothing else needs to be said other than the fact that we're starting fresh for real."
Sora's face lit up in excitement. Riku and Jasmine had talked about this "clean slate" since their initial fallout but this time it felt sincere. Maybe there was hope for the pair after all.
"I'm happy for you, Riku," Sora told his friend with a warm smile. "I think you guys will be just fine."
"Yeah, I agree." Riku helped Sora to his feet and the two of them headed out. While Sora switched gears on the conversation and Riku listened, being ever so careful to hide the smirk on his face as he recalled the car ride home with Jasmine. He pictured the moment clearly, the drive back to her place when they kept their hands linked for the entirety of the ride. 'I think we're fine.'
Author's Notes: Happy 2020 you guys! I hope everyone had/has a safe, wonderful holiday! I promise this story isn't dead. It's just a little harder nowadays to actually sit down and write up chapters. Anywho!
Rynxenvy: Thank you for supporting this story for so long. I appreciate the people like you who are…gentle with me for my sporadic update schedule for lack of a better term. This chapter is a little later than I wanted but I still hope you enjoy it!
Meyoume: Aww. You have no idea how much that warms my heart. Thinking back at how this story evolved so much and the support I got is honestly overwhelming.
Amaya-vamp: Seriously, you guys are amazing. I haven't looked at the reviews for this in a while and I definitely feel like I could cry. Thank YOU for helping keep me going all these years!
Hopefuldreamer1991: I'm glad that you still look forward to this story, even as long as it's taken to write it. Don't worry, more of the food festival will be explained in later chapters.
I hope you all enjoyed the chapter. Let me know what you thought, what you liked, any questions or comments and I will see you guys soon! (I promise)