"Nervous?" said Victini. A bead of sweat trailed down Lugia's neck. He anxiously straightened the tie on his tuxedo.

"Maybe a little..."

"Hey, don't worry about it! Just think about all the joy you too will have. And maybe your kids,"

"Wait, what happened to... to..." Lugia saw Ho-oh walking down the sandy beach in a wedding dress that was somehow tailored to her body shape. Behind her, Latias tossed flabebe from a basket, which danced around in twirls and whirls.

Lugia's voice got stuck in his throat.

"Yep," Victini nodded. "You really got lucky,"

As Ho-oh stepped up to Lugia, Victini cleared his throat.

Alright... just got to... wait, what? Why are my thoughts being narrated?

Uh, I think that may have something to do with you coming in contact with my DDLC story.

Huh?

Nevermind, just go with it!

Fine. Anyway, I've just got to read out my... oh gosh I forgot to write a speech!

All eyes turned to Victini.

Okay, Victini, you can do this. Coming up with a wedding speech on the spot can't be too hard, right?

"Dearly beloved. Legendaries, Mythicals, and whatever MissingNo is. We are gathered here to witness the union of Lugia and Ho-oh. Both of which are very close friends of mine, and whose love reaches back to... to..." Victini scrambled for the right memory. "To that burning tower in Johto! Yeah... that," He cleared his throat. "Anyway, just say the vows already,"

"Oh, right!" Lugia pulled a piece of paper out of his pocket. "Ho-oh, from the very beginning, all I could think about was you. Every adventure, every disaster, every bit of crazy that we lived through in our eternal lives was with each other. And I hope all the crazy to come will also be with you."

"Lugia, you are the reason I live forever. For now, and for eternity, I will always be there for you. You are my first and only love and that is why you're the perfect Pokemon for me," said Ho-oh.

Victini took in a deep breath.

"Then without further ado, Lugia, do you take Ho-oh to be your eternal mate, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, until armageddon do your part?"

"I do!" Lugia said quickly. "Wait, armageddon?"

"Ho-oh, do you take Lugia to be your eternal mate, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, until armageddon do your part?"

"I do."

"Then by the power vested in me by a process of elimination, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the..."

Ho-oh grabbed Lugia by the neck and rammed her lips into his.

"...groom." Victini finished. There were claps and cheers from the various other legendaries.

After the ceremony, the party was held in the resort's ballroom. There was a nice buffet, an ice-swablu, a chocolate fountain, basically anything you would expect from your standard wedding.

Tapu Lele chugged another bottle of an unknown alcoholic beverage.

"Ugh!" she grunted. "They call this beer? It's the weakest stuff I've ever drunk!"

Just then, she noticed Tapu Fini, who had decided to leave her shell in the lobby, dancing about like a madman, her cheeks red and her body alternating between various lewd positions. A bottle of the same drink was in her left hand.

"HEY BITCHES! YOU WANNA GET SOME OF ME? I BET YOU DO!" She flung off her bikini top and started fondling her surprisingly ample chest.

"Weird." Tapu Lele took another drink. She pulled a condom out of her pocket and tossed it at her sister. "You might need this!" she yelled.

Just then, Victini caught the tip of a whispy white tail disappearing behind a doorway.

"Huh?" he said. Glancing about, he floated through, just managing to see a familiar-looking ring-shape.

"Arceus?" he picked up the speed. Arceus was standing in front of a Pidgey shaped statue. Victini snuck behind a potted plant, as his pursuee grasped the wings of the statue, and pulled them downwards. The statue lowered into the ground, and the wall behind it receded, opening a hidden passageway. Arceus dashed inside, and the wall closed up.

Victini floated out of his hiding place.

"You know, the thing about secret doors," he pulled down on the statues wings. "Nobody ever locks them!" he dashed inside as the door closed again.

Victini entered a large dry cavern. Rocks were shaved off, papers were scattered about, numerous computers with unintelligible code beeped around him.

"Arceus?' said Victini. Arceus was hunched over a large corkboard.

"Let's see... Ah! I'll create a set of pokemon based on the Chinese zodiac! Better yet, I'll make them all genderless!"

"Hello?" said Victini. Arceus yelped.

"What the..." he turned about. "Victini? What are you doing here?"

"I could ask the same thing," he pointed out.

"Well, I could ask the same thing I started with,"

"Okay, fine. I saw you sneaking away from the party. Now it's your turn. What is this place?"

"Erm..." Arceus looked around. "Oh, wait!"

Arceus used Blizzard!

Victini used Flamethrower!

Victini blinked.

"Did... I just block your attack with another attack?"

"Oh, dear."

"And it wasn't even my turn!"

"Erm..."

"Matter of fact, since when did I learn Flamethrower?"

Arceus used Fire Blast!

Victini used Mirror Move!

Arceus used... ah, who am I kidding? This is taking the action out of this battle.

"Who comes up with these rules anyway?" Victini dodged a Horn Leech from Arceus, before returning with a fierce Energy Ball.

"I do!" Arceus shot a Shadow Ball. "I spent a lot of time making that system! Unfortunately, it doesn't work here!"

"What are you talking about?" Victini dashed straight at Arceus before unleashing a Close Combat. Arceus Teleported behind him.

"This is my design room! It's where I design the world and its rules! Of course, you won't remember after I've destroyed you!" Arceus forced Victini's head to the ground with Psychic.

"Rules? What does that have to do with you killing people?"