Review Time:
SolarxBlack - Poor guy. Well, only fair I give him and eventually Fleche a shoutout.
Mike AZ 2 - Yeah, fair point.
Alois - We are trying to keep some level of cooperation with our prisoners. You think it helps lighten the tension but both of them have begged me to tell you to stop reading them entries from your joke book.
Anna - What? You've put out a word for your own crest relic to be delivered? Understand my skepticism. Your crest was lost to history and you have a tendency to embellish greatly. Telling me it can blow stuff up only deepens my reluctance to believe you.
Annette - So your uncle won't hand over your relic unless Gilbert can vouch for you, and he's off fighting for the Kingdom…..we'll need to craft a plan to get him to join us again. Or we can ignore my suggestion and ask Byleth to kidnap him. But do you really want to do tha-you said yes rather fast.
Ashe - Pleased to see you return to our forces after our battle at the Valley of Torment. I know there's a lot of rats in your cell but we cannot take risks with trusting. We will let you out once we review the file. Now, state your name. "You know my name!" is not the answer. This is a formality, so try to take it seriously. Do I look like I'm joking?
Bernadetta - It is for diplomatic reasons that we sent you to accompany Petra to her home. Okay, the real reason was for her to teach you to climb trees effortlessly. Cheer up, you have Byleth, Ferdinand, and Caspar to protect you.
Byleth - The only one who should be crafting reports is you, not the others. Caspar's handwriting is atrocious, and Ferdinand drowns the text in endless prose. Handing me a souvenir from Briggid - a crab shell - is not going to elevate my mood.
Caspar - What on earth is this? Reparations? Well, while I appreciate you wanting to make amends for your house's actions, do you think this place has enough money to pay another country THIS sum? No, liquidate what you have and we'll secure the rest from Empire spoils.
Catherine - Do not feed your hounds the remains of Demonic Beasts just to save money on dog food. We do not want them to acquire a taste for them.
Cyril - Your hounds were for torture, her hounds were for tracking…..as Catherine claims. We will not employ extra canines! No, organizing a dogfight is out of the question! I am trying to reduce the amount of wanton animal cruelty you all keep displaying.
Dorothea - Your solution was to tie a blindfold over your eyes and do the show without seeing the audience. That worked great until you tripped and fell out the window. We will treat you as fast as we can, but it is fortunate no one wants a refund out of pity for you hurting yourself.
Felix - We won't ask you to be a jailor anymore. At some point it was less trying to see if Ashe got stronger and more deciding to mess with him. How did you make him eat cheese off the cell floor?
Ferdinand - So Hubert showed up on the island. I appreciate the effort, but Byleth is the only one that can talk sense into people. Go to the infirmary to treat those intensive dark magic wounds. No you can't walk off a Hades spell.
Flayn - How did the side mission in the desert go? Ah, the beast did not wish to join with us….well, you and your party worked hard. Also please stop referring to it as "Uncle", for reasons I hope I don't need to explain here. Flayn, don't wink at me, we both know you're not very good at it.
Hanneman - It….it is a mere expression, Hanneman. Why would some desert beast be Flayn's literal uncle? Get some rest, the heat must've gotten to you.
Hilda - Can you stop working? Don't you realize your success has made your brother more proud than he could imagine? Haven't you heard of story of the Lazy Fox and the Industrious Squirrel? ….it's a book. Are you saying you don't read a single book when it's not part of a lesson?
Ingrid - Ashe has just finished floor cheese. He might share your knight ideals but abruptly announcing you will marry him is ridiculous. He is crestless but there are other ways to shake off the rumors that you only want those with a crest, definitely not with…..spit it out, Ashe!
Kronya - Do not show Ashe how to eat the rats in the cells. For heaven's sake, it's high time you start fighting. Byleth will come get you with a leash in hand when the month is over.
Leonie - I asked you to tally our funds because you needed some kind of mind activity. But these calculations are absurd. You did it 5 times, and I see 5 different answers on my desk. No I do not give out partial credit for math! Not when it's wrong math!
Linhardt - Ohohohohoho, you're not napping when everyone else is doing field work. Perhaps you and Leonie can check out another sighting with a beast….
Lysithea - You shall not suggest dishes for the mess hall anymore. No one wants to eat sugar cookies drenched in gumdrops, syrup, sprinkles, vanilla ice cream, and licorice. Adding a drink of coffee does not suddenly turn this childish meal into adult cuisine. This will just cause stomachaches and cavities.
Manuela - What a brilliant idea, crafting a new song for Garreg Mach. Would you do the honors of singing it for us? ….in a special ceremony. Not a bombastic show with fireworks, exotic dancers, and explosions. I cannot emphasize the no explosion part enough.
Marianne - Some of us are concerned with odd behavior you'd been displaying recently. Usually we wouldn't mind if you were spending time at the stables but you're eating hay and scratching yourself with your leg.
Mercedes - We'll take your contribution, thank you. I suggest you bathe and get some needed sleep because you've been hugging people for a week.
Petra - You've been back in Fodlan for a few days now. Here we do not go topless. Your apology is accepted, now stop people from following your example. These are still religious halls!
Raphael - You….you left a note stating you'll come back with Ignatz. Where are you going to go?!
Randolph - I would be more impressed with your struggle to escape your cell if you didn't give up after 1 minute of shaking the bars like a fool. You have no leverage on us.
Shamir - What on earth was so troubling that you and Petra shouted at each other in your respective languages? "what tastes better, bear or fox"? Am I supposed to take a side on this?
Sylvain - You and Felix opened Ashe's cell just to challenge him for Ingrid's hand. That was insane enough, but you only gave him a stick to defend himself while the two of you had swords. How much of this is wanting Ingrid to have a better future and how much is just messing with Ashe? Grow up, all of you.
To be continued...
REUPLOADED because i'm a dum-dum and clicked the wrong document. Sorry all.
No lorenz because plot. _