Epilogue
The storm roared its fury like an angry metalbeast above the sodden rooftops of the town. The wind howled along the narrow alleyways and tossed the graceful bows of the willow in a furious dance. The rain pounded down in torrents from a cloud-choked sky. Most—No-fur, metalbeast, and cat alike—had the sense to stay inside, warm and dry—except for the street cats.
It's fitting weather for a burial, Sleet thought bitterly. The rain plastered her fur to her sides and mingled with her salty tears to blur her vision as she gazed at the shallow ditch in the soft dirt. Her chest tightened as Blackjack and Gravel carefully lowered the sodden body into the ground. Rain soaked the silver fur, turning it gray, and making it seem small and fragile. The midnight-blue eyes were closed as if she was sleeping, but she would never wake again.
Sleet tore her eyes away, squeezing her them shut. Her heart felt as though a claw was stabbing her through it. Misty, you promised that you wouldn't die on us.
Blackjack climbed out of the hole, but Gravel lingered. He buried his nose in Misty's wet fur, breathing in her scent one last time. The rain had turned his pelt a dark gray, a somber color that matched the lifelessness in his eyes ever since Misty had died two sunrises before.
In the last half-moon since the battle, Misty had wavered on the edge of life and death. Despite Sleet and Gravel's urging, she insisted that she was well enough to travel home and help with Sparrow's burial. But her wounds had been far more extensive than she'd let on, and the activity had only exacerbated them. For the next several sunrises, Misty had lain in her nest in the Den, sometimes better, sometimes worse. Though she had endless work to do, and the rest of the street cats to worry about, Sleet had sat with Misty as much as she could, and Gravel never left her side. It was a long, agonizing battle, and even though they did everything they could, they still lost.
Let me go; Sleet remembered Misty telling her before she died. It's okay; she had said when Sleet had protested. I'm proud of you and who you've become. You've been like a daughter to me. You don't need my advice anymore; you will know what the right thing to do is. I wish I could stay, but it's my time.
Sleet's chest clenched with the memory of her sobs as she had stepped back to let Misty and Gravel speak, voicing for the first time their love for each other before she had passed. The bright moon had floated high in the sky, but the storm rolled in not soon after as if the world was mourning Misty's death. They had tried to wait out the storm, but after two sunrises, Sleet decided it was time.
Ginger, raindrops dripping from her whiskers, leaned forward to nudge Gravel's flank gently. He tipped his head back toward the sky, and let out a mewl of anguish like a little kit. The sound tore Sleet's heart, and she silently echoed his grief. The pale gray tom turned and hauled himself out of the grave, letting Ginger lead him away.
Sleet turned away as Pepper, Blackjack, Darcy, and Adder pushed soil into the hole, little by little covering Misty's body. Her gaze wandered across the grassy glade to a pool of water at the heart whose surface rippled, stirred by the gale. Slender birches and graceful willows encircled the pond, concealing this corner of the No-Fur park from prying eyes—though there was no one else out on a day like this. A thick patch of grass grew close to the water's edge, and in the center sat a black rock shot through with veins of white.
Sleet padded a couple of pawsteps away, stopping as she reached another patch of earth, this one freshly upturned earth beneath a low branch of the willow. Some of its long fronds brushed bumpy brown rock nestled between dried flowers and the first blades of grass poking up from the bare dirt. Beneath the soil lay Sparrow's body where they had laid him to rest half a moon before.
The dark gray she-cat shook her head with a heavy sigh. Exhaustion filled her from her ears to her paws. There's been too much death lately.
Movement at the edge of her vision caught her attention. Pebble broke away from the rest of the street cats, stopping at Sparrow's grave and bending over to touch her nose to the ground. Her drenched speckled coat was clung to her frame, showing her slightly rounded belly even more clearly than usual. Sleet's heart lifted a little. Even in death and darkness, new life still comes. We will never forget Misty or Sparrow, but we cannot get caught in the past as the rest of the world moves on. We must go on.
A small burst of hope broke through Sleet's cloud of sorrow as she glanced over her shoulder, catching sight of Ginger and Adder, who leaned against each other, taking comfort in one another. By next warm season, the Den is going to be full of kits.
Sleet and Pebble rejoined the group as they made a circle around the filled-in hole. Gravel set a smooth gray stone in the center of the bare earth, marking the spot where Misty's body lay. He stepped back into the circle with a long sigh, his tail dragging in the dust behind him.
Sleet cleared her throat. Despite her earlier reflections, tears still prickled the corners of her eyes. "Misty—" she began but broke off as she choked down a lump in her throat. "Misty was a wonderful cat. She was gentle and kind, steadfast as stone, and very wise. She was always there for everyone, and she always knew what to say. Her advice was invaluable to me as a leader. She was always there when I needed her. She was like a mother to me." She paused again to draw in a shaky breath. "I'll miss her so much."
A hushed murmur of consensus rose from the street cats like early morning mist from a lake. One by one, they each took a turn to speak, sharing kind words, a memory, or a story in honor of Misty. Sorrow and tears fell like the pouring rain all around them.
Brindle remembered how kind and welcoming Misty had been when she'd first joined the street cats.
Blackjack and Pepper thanked Misty for her wisdom when they were nervous parents of newborn kits, and for her consolation after two of them had died.
Darcy praised Misty's quiet leadership and undying loyalty.
Bounce shared how she always made time to play with Pebble, Sparrow, and him as kits, and he would miss her.
At last, Gravel was the only one who had not spoken. He had stared fixedly on the stone marking Misty's grave while the other spoke, but he stirred as Ginger touched her tail to his shoulder as if waking from a nightmare into a more unpleasant reality.
"It's okay," Ginger said, her brow wrinkled with concern. "You don't have to speak."
"No." Gravel shook his head. His gruff voice was barely audible over the patter of rain. He cleared his throat, his countenance marred by grief. "Misty was the best cat that I've ever known. She was courageous. She was loving. She was selfless. She rescued when I was at my lowest, and she has stood by all of us. We all owe her a debt we can never repay. I shouldn't have waited so long to tell her—" He broke off as his body crumbled to the earth, earthquake sobs shaking his sturdy frame. Sleet padded to his side and pressed her muzzle to his forehead. "—to tell her how much I love her," he choked out.
After several heartbeats, Sleet and Ginger helped Gravel to his paws, the latter helping him place a flower on Misty's grave before leading him away. One by one, the rest of the street cats collected their flowers and set them on the grave in farewell. They all padded away, heading back to the Yard until Sleet was the only one left. Slowly, she picked up the last flower and laid it on the top of the stone. She lingered, gazing at the bare earth, her sorrow spilling over in the space that the silence left. Oh, Misty. I cannot believe that you're gone. Your absence has left a hole in our group—and my heart. We need you. I know that you told me we would be all right, but what are we going to do without you?
The dark gray she-cat took a deep breath, composing herself. She leaned over and pressed her nose to the stone. I miss you so much. We will mourn for you, and go on—as you wanted—but we will never forget you. Goodbye, Misty. She raised her head, her gaze sweeping the clearing before she padded away, her heart aching with every step. Three stones sat in the glade by the pond. Misty. Sparrow. Ace. So many dead, and so many more that weren't there. Her parents. Harvest. The dead Clan cats and loners. She was grief-stricken but also tired. So tired. Deep within her, something didn't feel right.
. . .
Sleet's pace was sluggish as she rose from where she lay at the edge of the camp and padded toward the Den. Her heart was heavy as well, but after three sunrises of internal turmoil and dispute, she knew at last what she needed to do.
"Bounce." The black tom stirred drowsily from where he lounged in a pool of lazy sunlight. His face took on a sullen expression as Sleet halted in front of him, but she ignored his surly manner. "Can you tell everyone to gather in the Den?"
Bounce hesitated but nodded. He rose and loped across the Yard as Sleet headed in the opposite direction toward the Den. Cool darkness fell over her as she slipped inside the entrance and took a seat beneath the first shelf, facing the opening. Wrapping her tail around her paws, she waited.
Pepper and Brindle were the first to enter and took a seat near Sleet. Blackjack joined them a few heartbeats later. Pebble stepped through the entrance and sent a confused glance at Bounce, who was right behind her, but he shrugged. Ginger and Adder murmured in confusion with their heads bent together as they sat down to Sleet's left. Darcy lingered near the entrance, sliding her claws in and out. Gravel was the last to join them, and he flopped down in the back corner of the Den.
Sleet drew in a deep breath, trying to calm the nervous moths fluttering in her stomach. It was one thing to make up her mind, but it was quite another to tell her cats. I hope they'll be okay.
The leader cleared her throat. "Everyone, I've spent a lot of time thinking these past few sunrises, and I've come to a decision." Her cats quieted, waiting tensely. "It has been difficult lately. We are all still grieving for Sparrow, and now for Misty." She inclined her head at Pepper, Blackjack, Bounce, Pebble, and Gravel in turn. "I've felt especially weary and dismal lately, but at first, I wasn't sure why. I realized that I've been pushing myself too hard so that I could stay strong for you all. I didn't give myself time to rest or grieve after the battle. I now think that it would be best for me to take some space to rest and think."
"Sleet." Ginger rose, her face titled in confusion, and her ears pulled back. "What are you saying?"
"I'm saying—" the dark gray she-cat took a deep breath, preparing herself "—that I'm going to leave."
"What?" Blackjack leaped to his paws, his fur bristling incredulously.
"But you're our leader," Pebble protested, her eyes wide and anxious. "You can't leave us."
"Don't be a fluff-brain," Darcy growled. "Have you thought this through?"
Pepper tilted her head curiously, silently questioning, though she didn't add to the clamor of voices.
"How could you even say that?" Ginger stared at Sleet open-mouthed, betrayal darkening her eyes.
"Hey," Gravel barked. Shock froze the cats in place as the light gray tabby tom stood. This was the first time Sleet had ever heard him speak so loudly—the first time he'd even spoken since Misty's burial. "How dare you all doubt Sleet like this? She's our leader. If she says that she's going to leave, she must have a good reason and a plan, so you all should hush and listen to her."
Gravel glanced at Sleet, and their eyes connected over the heads of the other cats. He gave her a small nod, and she mouthed 'thank you' in return. She knew he understood what she meant because he was going through the same thing.
"Gravel is right," Sleet said, turning her attention back to her cats, who watched her in stunned silence. "I'm leaving because I need time to take care of myself and think about some things. But I won't be gone forever. I will come back."
Adder rose to his paws, his whiskers twitching. "Where will you go?"
Sleet sent him a reassuring smile, though a thorny branch of nerves ensnared her stomach. "I plan on visiting my brother." If he'll have me. "He lives on a farm near here, so I won't be too far away."
"But who will be our leader?" Brindle spoke up, worry creasing her brow.
Sleet couldn't contain her grin. Her eyes sparkled like sunlit ice, and her tail swished back and forth. "Bounce will be your leader while I'm gone." Several cats sucked in their breath, and all heads turned toward the small tom who gaped at her. "Although he is young, he has demonstrated exemplary leadership qualities. He is bold, quick-thinking, energetic, and perseverent, but also kind. He fought valiantly in the battle against the Bands. He still has a lot to learn, but I know that you all will be there to help him."
A long silence ensued as Sleet finished speaking. She breathed a sigh of relief as each of the street cats murmured their consent. This is it. I'm really leaving. Her limbs were limp reeds with amazement. Her paws carried her as she wove through her cats, saying goodbye to them. Although she knew she would see them again, it still felt like she was leaving forever.
Pepper stepped forward and touched her nose to Sleet's forehead. "Don't worry about us, Sleet. We will all take care of each other; I'll make sure of it. You take care of yourself and come back to us when you're ready."
"Thank you, Pepper," Sleet purred. "I'm sure you will." Knowing the motherly she-cat, she would. She dipped her head to Blackjack to hung back, pinning his ears against his head. "Goodbye, Blackjack."
The black tom inclined his head in return, though he didn't meet her gaze. "Safe travels," he said gruffly.
Sleet smiled faintly as she padded away; she knew that this was as much as she was going to get out of Blackjack. He disapproved of her decision, but he would come around.
The gray she-cat trotted to Ginger's. Guilt twisted inside her stomach, making her ears pull back. She tilted her head, trying to meet her friend's gaze. "Are you okay?"
Ginger bit her lip, hesitating for a heartbeat. She took a deep breath, and finally met Sleet's gaze, her eyes glistening with emotion. "I will be," she promised. "I'm sorry for how I acted. I understand why you're leaving, but still." Her voice grew small. "We need you."
Sleet nodded. "I know." She pressed herself fiercely against her best friend's flank. "I will be back, I promise."
Ginger nodded dejectedly, but she nuzzled Sleet in return.
I hope she'll be okay. Sleet stepped away hesitantly. I'm sorry, Ginger, but I need to take care of myself.
Adder came up beside Ginger and extended his nose to touch Sleet's. "I'll take care of her. Be safe, Sleet."
Sleet's heart warmed. "Thank you." She nosed Adder's ear appreciatively and then moved on. Her heart tugged her backward as her paws carried her forward. She glanced over her shoulder as Ginger leaned against Adder and gave her a small smile.
Darcy planted herself in Sleet's path, her expression stern, but her ears were laid back. "You'd better come back to us safely, or I will find you."
"I will, I promise." Sleet chuckled, but her expression quickly grew serious. She leaned forward. "Darcy, I wouldn't leave if I didn't know I could depend on you. You have invaluable experience and exceptional fighting skills. I need you to use them to help Bounce if anything should happen. I trust you to keep our cats safe."
Darcy's eyes rounded at Sleet's statement, but she nodded gravely, her gaze holding Sleet's. "I will protect them with my life."
"Thank you," Sleet murmured. The burden on her shoulders lessened slightly, only for her to be greeted next by Pebble's troubled expression. "Don't worry." Sleet touched her nose to the young she-cat's ear. "You are going to be fine. Pepper, Brindle and everyone else are here to help you with your kits."
"Absolutely," Brindle added, nuzzling her daughter.
"And even if I'm not back for good, I will come back to see your kits after they're born," Sleet assured her.
"Thank you," Pebble said softly, her eyes fixed on her paws.
"One of us will come to get you when it's time," Brindle told Sleet. She dipped her head. "Farewell."
"Goodbye." Sleet nodded to them and made her way over to Gravel, who sat by himself in the back corner of the Den. She paused in front of him and tilted her head. "How are you doing?"
The pale gray tom let out a long sigh. "As well as can be expected, I guess."
Sleet nodded in silent understanding. "Thank you for your support."
"Of course. You deserve some time to go take care of yourself."
"Thank you." The dark gray she-cat dipped her head to him. She was beginning to turn away but whirled back around as an idea occurred to her. "Gravel, would you like to come with me?"
Gravel pricked his ears. He thought for a few heartbeats, but at last, he shook his head. "Thank you for the kind offer, but I'd rather stay here—close to Misty."
"Okay." Sleet touched noses with him and murmured goodbye before she headed away. Bounce, the last street cat, sat to one side of the entrance. He had wrapped his tail around his paws and sat erectly, his jaw set and his yellow eyes observing Sleet with a cold indifference that obscured some more profound emotions.
"Bounce," Sleet greeted him. She shifted from paw to paw as she paused in front of him.
The small black tom gazed at her a heartbeat longer, ferocity burning in his eyes, but then he turned his head, refusing to meet her gaze.
Well, that it's then. The dark gray she-cat stepped back, though it felt like a thorn was piercing her heart. He still blames me for Sparrow's death. Her steps were slow as she left the Den and walked a few steps onto the lush carpet of the Yard. She took a long heartbeat to gaze back over her shoulder at the crowd of faces peering after her. A smile broke like the sun from the clouds across her face at the love and encouragement glistening in their eyes. Thank you all for letting me go. I will come back. I promise.
Sleet waved her tail at her cats in goodbye as she tensed her hindquarters and leaped with a rattle onto the silver trash cans. From there, she ascended to the roof of the Den and clawed her way up the pitched roof of the big No-Fur building. At the pinnacle, she paused to catch her breath and looked around herself, taking in the rooftops splayed out beneath her like she was a bird soaring high on upward drafts. A carefree breeze buffeted her fur, carrying with it the smokey tang of metalbeast and the musk of No-Furs. This town had been her home for more than two-thirds of her life. She knew every inch of it—every bustling street, every dark corner—but the time had come to leave for a while, to start a new adventure. I love my home. I need to leave it for now, but I will be back.
As Sleet began to pad along the precarious top of the slanted roof, she was startled that she felt no sorrow or regret, only excitement for things to come. For now, she was free.
"Sleet, wait!" A shrill call made the former leader freeze. She carefully maneuvered herself around, so she faced Bounce as he dashed along the rooftop toward her. He stumbled once but caught himself before he fell and pulled up short in front of her.
"Yes, Bounce?" Her tail tip twitched as the black tom caught his breath.
Bounce's face was tense as he picked at the roof with his claw, suddenly shy. "I'm sorry for how I was behaving just now," he confessed. "And I'm so sorry for how I've treated you in the past half-moon. I've been mean and disrespectful, but you have to understand—"
She silenced him with a flick of her tail. "You don't have to explain; I understand."
Bounce leaned down and gave his chest fur a couple of licks, looking sheepish for once. "Thank you." He looked up. "I had to ask before you left; why did you pick me as the next leader? There are so many older, wiser, and more qualified cats in our group."
Sleet sighed, though she smiled indulgently. "Everything I said back in the Den is true. You are strong, resilient, more courageous than most cats your age, but most of all, you are compassionate and understanding. While you are young, all of those older cats will be there if you need help or advice. Your youthful energy is your strength."
Bounce's eyes grew wider and wider as she spoke as if he couldn't quite believe her.
Sleet closed the distance between them, pressing her muzzle to his head. "I am confident that you will be a great leader while I'm gone. I hope that you will not make the same mistakes that I did. I know you are angry over your brother's death and that you blame me for it, but do not let your emotions cloud your judgment. Learn from both of our mistakes. Open up the borders again, and be a better leader than I will ever be."
Bounce's head jerked up, and he stared at her indignantly. "What are you talking about? You're an amazing leader. You have always been my hero. I don't think that I can ever be as good of a leader as you. You're coming back, right?"
Sleet smiled down at him. "Right." As Bounce dipped his head to her and hurried back along the rooftop, she turned to face the other direction. "I will," she promised herself. "One day."
. . .
The rays of the setting sun stretched across the vast expanse of farm fields. Sleet walked in the long shadow of the fence that ran parallel to her; her eyes fixed on the great barn that loomed in the distance, dark against the bright backdrop of a lush woodland and beyond it, the imposing peaks of colossal mountains plastered against a fading sky. A brisk wind whipped across the fields, tossing up clouds of dust and carrying scents on it from further than she could see. The expanse made Sleet's pelt prickle, making her feel exposed and vulnerable. She quickened her pace.
Amidst a tangle of smells, Sleet detected the cat scent grow stronger as she neared the barn. Harvest's was still there, though fading fast. Her heart fluttered as she recognized Slate's scent. Her earlier excitement had vanished, replaced by rising nerves. Will he let me stay with them?
Sleet halted as she reached the shadow of the barn and glanced around herself. She was trying to figure out what to do next, when Slate rounded the side of the barn, a plump rat dangling from his mouth.
"Sleet!" He exclaimed, dropping his prey as he rushed to greet his sister.
"Hi, Slate. It's nice to see you," Sleet replied, smiling as she touched noses with him, though worry still twisted inside her.
Slate retracted his head, blinking in confusion. "What are you doing here? I thought it would be a while before you came to visit."
"I needed to leave the street cats for a while," Sleet explained. "The past half-moon has been hard, and I needed some time to take care of myself and to think about some things."
"So you came here," Slate concluded.
Sleet nodded. "I would like to stay with you for a while." She swallowed, trying to quell the tingles in her stomach. If you'll have me. "Would that be all right?"
A smile spread across Slate's face. "Of course. I would love to have you." He padded a couple of steps and beckoned to her with his tail. "Come, meet my kits."
Relief washed through Sleet like a refreshing sprinkle of rain as she followed her brother inside through a gap between the large door and the wall. The dry earthy scent of hay and the rich musk of prey greeted her as she slipped inside. Slate paused as few steps inside, his dark gray pelt barely a shadow in the gloom.
"Swallow, Chestnut," he called. "Come on down."
Two furry little faces peeped like owlets over the edge of a loft high up, and then two kits careened down the steep ladder. They tossed up stalks of hay as they bounded across the floor, darting in and out of pools of light from the windows high above as they raced toward Sleet and Slate. They hurtled into their father, bowling him over with an 'oof.'
"Sleet," Slate chuckled, trying to stand, but failing as his kits swarmed over him. "These rascals are my kits, Swallow and Chestnut."
Sleet grinned, touched by the warmth and affection between the small family. She looked around herself, taking in the lofty ceiling, the plethora of prey scents, the cozy hayloft, and then gleeful squeals of kits. For the first time in a while, she felt at ease, content. She couldn't contain her smile. I am home.
Soooo, you know how I said the epilogue would be short. Well, surprise? It is very long in writing and the time it took to write. But here it is! I decided to go with this for many reasons.
One, now it really feels to me that Sleet has come full circle because of the final push from Misty's death (also to wrap up that plot detail), so that she's finally taken some time to take care of herself, and is with Slate again!
Two, we didn't really get to say goodbye to all of the street cats in the last chapter, so I wanted to do that. They're such a wholesome group and feel like a real family. I wish I had time to delve more into each of their characters because I could write a whole book about each of them. Honestly, I think they're my favorite large cast of characters so far (Spotted, Tall, and Blossom will forever be my favorite trio), and I think I've grown a lot as a writer writing them and this novella.
Three, the idea that Bounce should be leader has been bouncing (pun unintended) around in my brain since the beginning of the book, so I wanted to put that in, and bring his character arc to a close.
So, now that that's done, on to the next book! *cheers* Sleet was an interesting character to write, and I learned a lot from her, but I am excited to return to our trio, and find out what is in store next! I am definitely planning on having Sleet and everyone else return, but probably not until the book after the next. I still have a lot left to plan, and I actually have to start writing, but I'm hoping to have it posted in the next six weeks. So, see you then!
Q(s)OTD: Who was your favorite character/what was your favorite part of this novella? (Mine would have to be Bounce, and Ginger or Slate if I got to develop them more.) What are you looking forward to in the next book? (For me, it has to be writing from Spotted Owl's perspective again, and seeing how much our trio grow up!)
- A Warrior At Heart