The gang met to play cards on Sunday night at Tori's house as they usually did, they knew Jade wouldn't be attending because she had to work and they were relieved, they felt safer when she wasn't around.
However, Beck couldn't stop thinking about everything she'd told him, he tried to see her objectively and not feel compassion, but he couldn't. All the horrors she'd lived made it impossible for him to judge her the same way, not even the murders she'd committed seemed as bad after that conversation.
"Beck!" Tori shouted and he snapped out of his thoughts.
"What?" He asked.
"What are you thinking? You are lost" Andre commented.
"I talked to Jade last night" He responded and sighed. "I don't know how to feel about her anymore"
"What do you mean?" Robbie asked.
"She told me about her past, how she was raised and it's just…" He said and shook his head.
"What?" Cat asked curiously.
"It's horrific" Beck informed.
"Well, we knew she'd been trained by Russians, that doesn't sound nice" Tori commented. "I mean, we saw her father literally torturing her and she said it'd been like that all her life, so we know it was bad"
"Yes, but it's a lot worse than I had imagined and it's not even her fault, she never chose this life" He said.
"It's sad that her life hasn't been the best, but she is an adult now, there is no excuse" Andre said. "She is with one of her victims right now, she's deceiving that woman and she might end up killing her one of these days and we know for a fact she doesn't hesitate to take a person's life…or a whole building for that matter"
"None of us would if we were her" Beck responded.
"Yes, we would because we are good people" Tori said.
"No, believe me…We wouldn't" He affirmed. "Not after living what she lived, she wasn't born evil"
"What did she tell you?" Robbie asked.
"She's been mentally, physically and sexually abused all her life, she's never known love or freedom or safety" Beck responded, anger and sadness dripping from his voice. "She grew up locked up in a mansion where she was constantly tortured, she slept chained to a bed, she couldn't have any meaningful bond with anyone, she was made to compete for food, she had to witness and perform murders as a child, she had to do so many horrible things in order to survive that I'm surprised she is even alive at this point" He exclaimed upset and they looked at each other mortified.
"They really made her do all that?" Cat asked sadly.
"Yes, they did that and many other things to make her the person she is today, they turned her into a weapon because that's all she is to them!" Beck affirmed.
"She told you all of that?" Tori asked.
"I can't even tell you the half of it" Beck said upset. "She is ruthless and coldblooded and cynical and it might seem unthinkable to us that a good person could ever do what she does but…I don't feel so certain anymore"
"You think she is good?" Andre asked. "Really?"
"Not necessarily good, but I don't think she is a monster either" He responded. "I think she's been broken so many times that at this point in her life she no longer fears or feels anything, I mean who would? After living in that place…"
"You seem very affected, how bad was it? What did she tell you?" Tori questioned curiously.
"For starters, she was abused into losing all traces of empathy, they punished her if she dared feel it…I mean, they locked her up and starved her for trying to give a kid a piece of bread when she was eight and then she had to kill her best friend in a freezing yard when she was ten, TEN!" Beck commented and they looked at each other surprised "She grew up knowing she was disposable because those sick fucks poisoned the 'weak' kids during dinner and then forced the others to bury them like it meant nothing, can you even imagine that? Can you imagine what THAT would do to an adult? Well, now imagine what it could do to a child, what it did to Jade" He said upset and sadly, just thinking about it made his heart ache.
"Oh my god" Tori said mortified and looked down.
"What she is doing with Katherine right now? Well, she learned that as a child too" Beck informed. "Those bastards forced her to have sex with older people when she was eleven and when she wasn't good enough, they sent her to solitary confinement and starved her" He commented and they closed their eyes sadly. "That's why she does it now, that's why she's done it since she was fourteen, she was abused, she was tortured into learning" He added angrily.
"That's so…disgusting" Andre admitted.
"The kids in that place are not seen as people, Jade was raised to believe she is a weapon designed to complete a mission and that her body, her mind and her life don't have any worth beyond that" Beck affirmed sadly. "That's the truth, that's how she feels"
"I mean, that explains why she was ready to die a couple of weeks ago" Andre commented.
"That is so sad…" Tori admitted.
"Yes, it is but you said it yourself, she is a weapon and nothing else now, her name is not even Jade" Andre commented. "It's not her fault to be like this but she is, we can't just ignore that, we can't just ignore the fact she is a coldblooded killer, regardless of her childhood, the damage was done and she is twisted now, as twisted as the people who raised her"
"The thing is…I think she is our Jade in a way, I don't think she is evil or empty, I think she is just trapped in Alexandra's life" Beck commented. "I don't know how to explain it, but I don't think the person we've known for years is made up, it's her, that's Jade but she can't escape what she was born into"
"So, what's your plan? You want us to just forget she is a killer and be like nothing happened?" Andre asked confused.
"She is a time bomb, Beck, Russia won't just let her walk away and she might not even wish to, maybe she is just manipulating you" Robbie said.
"Let's just…give her a chance, maybe she is not so bad after all, maybe we can fix this" Beck insisted. "I wouldn't be saying this if I didn't think she deserves another chance"
"She said she is working on a plan to get us out, what about that?" Tori asked.
"If that doesn't prove she cares, then what does? She is doing it to protect us, if she really didn't care she would have killed us in her basement or plotted an accident to get rid of us, but she didn't because she cares about us, that's not something a psychopath would do" Beck affirmed and they thought about it because he had a point. "I know this is sudden and even I am surprised that I feel this way, but I can't hate her, not after what she said and not after the way she's been trying to protect us, she cares, I know she does"
"Okay, maybe you're right but we also need to be careful" Andre affirmed. "Even if she is not a bad person, the people around her are and being close to her puts us in danger, it's inevitable"
"Listen, I know it's a lot to ask…" Beck said but Tori cut him off.
"Yes, it is" Tori said and sighed. "Let's just wait, we'll talk to her and see what she has to say, maybe there IS a chance…"
Two days later they were at school and Jade had not shown up, she hadn't responded messages either and the gang, as well as John, were worried. They decided to go to her house to ask about her but even though they knew John didn't know about their classified knowledge, it was still scary for them to face him.
"Hi" Tori said nicely when John opened the door.
"How are you?" Cat asked nervously but he remained serious.
"I'm fine, thank you" He responded. "In fact, I'm glad to see you, I guess you're here to tell me about Jade"
"Tell you? No, we are here to ask you about Jade" Beck said. "We haven't heard from her in days and we are worried, she won't even pick up my calls" he said and John looked to the side.
"I'll look into it and let you know, maybe she went to San Diego to visit her aunt but anyway, please do tell me if she comes into contact with you" John asked and they nodded. "Thanks guys" He simply said and closed the door, so they sighed.
"That was quick" Andre said as they got back in the car.
"Maybe she is on a mission and it's not like he can tell us, right?" Robbie suggested.
"It could be, he didn't seem concerned to me" Tori added.
"He is not her father and he is part of the reason she is like this now, I don't trust him" Beck commented, and Tori sighed.
"Either way, there is nothing we can do, we just have to wait"
More days, weeks and even months passed and they still had idea where she was, she'd been reported missing but no news had come, the police had no idea why she'd disappeared. John did not know whether she was alive or not and what concerned him the most was the possibility that she'd confessed, he knew that if she had said anything, she was dead either way.
John decided to take a trip to their little hideaway because he couldn't afford to be arrested as well and he tried to find her through his contacts but it had been useless. On the other hand, Beck and the rest of the gang weren't sure if she'd gone on a mission that John obviously couldn't tell them about or if she was really missing, which worried them.
"It's been three months…" Tori said as they sat quietly during lunch.
"And not a single word from her" Andre added.
"I mean if she is on a mission, she won't contact us, right? She is a spy" Robbie commented.
"But what if she is not? What if someone killed her?" Beck asked concernedly.
"We would know, the murders she told us about, you know…her 'siblings', they were public knowledge, we just didn't know they were spies" Tori commented.
"I don't want her to be dead" Cat said sadly.
"The only possible options are: she is on a mission or she is dead, and we know she isn't dead so let's calm down" Tori said. "One of these days she'll come back and it'll be like nothing ever happened"
"She is officially missing, though, so there will be questions if she just comes back" Andre commented. "She needs an explanation"
"This doesn't feel right, her mission is here, it's Katherine and keeping her life as Jade" Beck said worriedly. "I don't think she is okay"
"But she didn't tell us like last time" Cat said. "I mean, when she did the explosion thing she told us she would probably die"
"Maybe she didn't have the time to do it" Beck said and took a breath "I just want her to come back, I want her to be okay"
Two more weeks passed and one day Beck was in his RV waiting for his friends to arrive, they had agreed on meeting that evening to do homework, so he ordered pizza and he was cleaning a little for them. Beck leaned down to pick up some clothes from the floor and a photo fell out of his jacket's pocket, he grabbed it and sighed sadly when he saw it; it was a photo of Jade a year back, he still found it hard to believe things had changed so drastically in that time and he just wanted to go back.
"Don't move" Jade suddenly said and Beck felt a gun on the back of his head so he froze.
"Jade?" He asked confused.
"I said don't move" She responded angrily and pulled down the lock of the gun, so he opened his arms slowly and got on his knees.
"It's okay, I won't" Beck said trying to stay calm but he was disconcerted. "What's happening? Where have you been?" He questioned.
"Where have I been? Are you seriously asking me that?" Jade asked back, anger and frustration dripping from her voice. "You know exactly where I've been, you fucking traitor"
"What? What are you talking about?" Beck asked even more confused.
"I opened up to you and what did you do? You betrayed me as soon as I left!" Jade exclaimed angrily "I don't care if you had good intentions, I told you not to say anything and you didn't care"
"Jade, what happened? I don't understand" He said sincerely.
"Stop lying! You betrayed me but I warned you, I told you what happened to Annie, I told you what would happen if you did it and I came to fulfill my promise" Jade informed coldly.
"Jade, I really don't know what you are talking about, I never betrayed you" He responded scared, he knew she was capable of pulling the trigger.
"Yes, you did!" Jade exclaimed angrily.
"Oh my god" Tori suddenly said from behind and Jade immediately grabbed Beck's neck to turn him around and stay behind him.
"Jade!" Cat exclaimed shocked.
"What are you doing?" Andre asked as she held the gun to the back of Beck's head.
"What I promised" Jade said coldly while Beck looked at his friends terrified.
"Jade, listen to me…I don't know what happened but I didn't betray you, I swear" Beck said.
"Shut up, you liar" She ordered and pushed his head down so he would face the floor. "I'll kill you like the rat you are"
"No!" Cat said terrified.
"Please, Jade, no one has to get hurt" Tori said worriedly.
"No one has to get hurt?" Jade asked back with palpable rage in her voice and tears in her eyes. "Do you have any idea of where I've been the last few months? What they did to me every single fucking day?" She asked angrily as a tear streamed down her face and they stared at her confused.
"No, what happened?" Beck asked.
"Shut up and face the ground" Jade demanded as she pushed his head down again "I know you did it, it couldn't have been anyone else" She said.
"Jade, why did you disappear? Where were you?" Andre questioned and she looked at them trying to contain the tears and anger she felt.
"The CIA found out about me…or, more specifically, someone told them" Jade informed and pressed the gun to Beck's head so he closed his eyes scared "I was at a black site" She said and they looked at her shocked.
"Oh my god" Tori said and covered her mouth mortified.
"What's a black site?" Cat asked confused.
"It's an illegal facility, Cat, that's where the CIA does everything they can't do in regular prisons, it's a torture chamber" Robbie explained as a couple more tears streamed down Jade's cheeks and she glared at them.
"They call it enhanced interrogation, nice name, right?" Jade asked sarcastically.
"They tortured you…" Beck whispered sadly.
"Of course they did! Day in and day out" Jade added upset. "And you caused it, you put me there and now it's time to pay the price"
Dun dun duuuun!
Merry christmas, guys!
I hope you enjoyed the chapter, PLEASE REVIEW! :)