Hello and welcome to Wendy's.
So what's your order?
Oh, something out of our special New year's menu, sure!
One story coming right up!
Jaune: Just after Christmas is New year's! So soon!
Ruby: MORE PARTIES!!! But that means more talking...ugh.
Jaune: I don't wanna deal with loud fireworks again! New year's eve is way more scarier then Christmas!
Cardin: Oi, midget, tall idiot. We have an intro to make!
Jaune: Ah! That's right-
Ruby: Welcome to!
Jaune: Hey that's my bit-
Ruby: THE COWARDLY GRIMM SLAYER RADIO!!!
Jaune: HEY WAIT-
Cardin: NEW YEAR SPECIAL EPISODE!!!
Jaune: You forgot about me!
Dance of the fire god
Jaune: Hey so I've been wondering?
Pyrrha: Yes?
Jaune: What is Ren doing? I haven't seen him all day.
Pyrrha: I'm not sure, Nora?
Jaune: Hm...
Pyrrha: Where's Nora?
Jaune: Things are quiet, too quiet, there is a disturbance in the force...
Pyrrha: Stop joking around Jaune. We need to find where out teamates are.
Jaune: Hm, oh hey. Look out of the window.
Pyrrha: What is it?
(A man in very strange and distinctive clothes is dancing with a dagger, surrounded by flame torches. Nora is watching closeby)
Jaune: Oh, Nora.
Pyrrha: We should go get her.
Jaune: In the freezing cold?! It's too early Pyrrha!
Pyrrha: Well what do you suggest we do?
Jaune: Hm...I know.
Pyrrha: I have a feeling I won't like this-
Jaune: NORA! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?
Nora: Shut up! Come down here if you want to speak!
Jaune: A-ah, ok.
Pyrrha: Nora is angry? That's new.
One trip down a flight of stais later...
Jaune: Sorry Nora. I just-
Nora: Shush! Ren's concentrating.
Jaune: Wait? That's Ren?
Nora: Yeah, he's going to do this until midnight. We should eat breakfast before its all gone.
Pyrrha: Until midnight? How?
Jaune: Breathing style I presume.
Pyrrha: Right...I nearly forgot how outragous breathing styles are.
Nora: It has been a while since Jaune showed us how he worked out.
Jaune: ...Say, Nora.
Nora: Yes o mighty leader?
Jaune: The way Ren is breathing, that isn't the water breathing.
Nora: You got eyes on the prize leader, that breathing technique Ren is using is taught to him by his father! Let's leave Ren to his dance now.
Pyrrha: Wait. That daggar, it's very intricate, I've never seen Ren use it before though.
Nora: Ah, that's his father's daggar, he does this dance every year without stopping.
Pyrrha: Without stopping?
Nora: Yep, so did his father even if he was inflicted with a bad illness, I heard Ren's grandfather did the dance 100 times.
Pyrrha: He did it for 100 years?!
Jaune: Breathing styles. They also help you look younger then you are and always keep your muscles in prime condition. However that only happens if you can do it for 24 hours every day.
Nora: It's broken af plz nerf.
Jaune: Weaker aura by default? Stonger aura you have the weaker breathing styles are? Semblance becoming more weaker? I think it is balanced out just fine.
Pyrrha: I have so many questions right now. How in any way does breathing in a certain way make you look younger?
Jaune: Well, I dunno. But if we didn't have aura to nullify our breathing styles, I think Ren would be 5'5" and I would be 5'4" and a half.
Pyrrha: That is...oddly specific.
JNPR's Twitter account
Ren: Jaune.
Jaune: Yeah Ren?
Ren: You know that one time the media made an official Twitter account for us because Pyrrha was in our team?
Nora: Oh I remember that! Team RWBY was soooo healous! Their faces when they found out were priceless!
Pyrrha: Doesn't the Schnee Dust Company also have a Twitter account?
Nora: That doesn't count at all. So what's your question about Renny?
Jaune: Didn't he ask-
Ren: Well, long story short, the official JNPR Twitter blocked my Twitter account.
Jaune: Wha?! No way! Why?! You're kidding!
Nora: You have to tell us about it!
Ren: Well, I thought of checking JNPR's official Twitter account for announcements, turns out they have out a few wrong facts about all of us except Pyrrha, so I told them what was real and what was not.
Ren: Eventually, I checked my timelime and turns out I wasn't notified when the Twitter posted anything, so I went on the page and lo and behold, blocked.
Nora: But, but thag doesn't make any sense! You are a member of JNPR! Hahahaha!
Ren: That's the entire point, do they hate me?
Nora: What?! No, no.
Pyrrha: Who did it?
Nora: Pyrrha?
(There are flames in Pyrrha's eyes as she looks to the sky with her fist clenched)
Pyrrha: Who did it?! I swear I'll find who hurt my nakama!
(Nakama=comrade/other synonyms)
Ren: Woah, slow down there. It's just a Twitter block, I'm sure if we explain they can unblock myself.
Pyrrha: Yeah...yeah.
Jaune's hearing
Ruby: Soooo, I wanna test out if you really have good ears.
Jaune: Now?
Ruby: Yes, is that a problem?
Jaune: Well uh...
Ruby: Do you want me to go? I can come back later.
Jaune: It's not that but...isn't this the guys toilets? What are you doing here?
Ruby: Ah...
One embarrased ramble out of Ruby later...
Jaune: So, you want me to turn around, you drop some lien coins and I guess the amount?
Ruby: Yeah yeah, turn around so we can start.
Jaune: Alright done, ready?
Ruby: Yeah, here I go.
(The dropping of the coins on the table sound)
Jaune: ...eeeeehhhhhh
Ruby: Wait you are actually taking this seriously?
Jaune: (big brain time) Uh, sixteen coins right?
Ruby: Wha?! HOW?!
Jaune: They are all...different types of coins I think.
Ruby: Uh, y-yeah.
Jaune: Mmmmmmmm...
Ruby: I can drop it again if you like-
Jaune: One hundered...and...sixteen lien right.
Ruby: EHHH?! Y-you got it right...
(That one tune where you het a question right in a game show)
Jaune: What was that?!
Ruby: Did you look?!
Jaune: No.
Ruby: 116 lien?
Jaune: Yeah. Is it not 116 lien?
Ruby: How?! This is so cool!
Jaune: But is it actually 116-
Ruby: GENIUS!!!
Jaune: That's not tru-
Ruby: EHHHHH?!
Jaune: Stop it, stop it!
Ruby: What is this sorcery?!
Jaune: Stop, this is embarrassing!
Ruby: You didn't cheat did you?
Jaune: I didn't!
Ruby: WHAT?! THIS IS SO COOL!
Jaune: You said that already, now be quiet!
Ruby: But 116 lien! It really is 116 lien!
Jaune: Alright, I get it now we need ti be quiet-
Ruby: Why? How, how how?! What is the reason?!
Neptune: Uh, aren't libraries supposed to be for reading?
Ren: Thank you!
Ruby: But this is amazing!
Ren: And this is a library.
(Ruby stick out her tongue at Ren)
New years with JNPR
JNPR: Wassoi! Wassoi Wasshoi!
Nora: What does that even mean?!
Pyrrha: I don't know!
Jaune: Haha! I don't even have to fear about preparing food!
Ren: Don't worry, Beacon provides the new year's feast.
Jaune: Better yet, because of all the happiness people have at this time of year, the grimm are running to the mountains!
Pyrrha: That's what you focus on?
Ren: In order to train ourselves to sense the presence of grimmis much harder then it seems, they hold no killing intent, no soul. We live in grimm infested forests in order to be able to know how to fight grimm.
Jaune: Y-yeah, kinda got traumitised, at least my senses got better, especially my hearing.
Pyrrha: Oh Jaune...Jaune...Jaune...
Jaune: Uh...
Ren: I think she's drunk. I can smell the scent of alchohol.
Jaune: Drunk?! Since when?!
Nora: I dunno! Before you and Ren came into the dorm from your training, we were just finishing the chocolate cake Ren bought yesterday.
Ren: That cake had alchohol in it!
Nora: ...Oh.
Ren: You didn't read the back did you-
Nora: That makes sense, hehe.
Ren: ...No wonder the scent is strong, you're drunk too.
Jaune: Ren! Ren help me!
Pyrrha: Oh Jauney~ Let's go to our dorm together~
(Pyrrha is seen dragging Jaune by his hood to the dorms)
Ren: Sorry Jaune. I can't help you. After all, women are creatures I cannot comprehend.
Nora: Aw~ Pyrrha stole the beds. Let's find somewhere else Renny~
Ren: Nor are they creatures I can oppose.
(Nora is seen dragging Ren by his collar to an unknown location)
Meanwhile with team CRDL
Sky: ALL WOMEN ARE QUEENS!!!
Cardin: IF SHE BREATHES, SHE IS A THOOOOOOOOT!!!
(The two hold their thousand degree lighsaber knives powered by their bonds and friendships)
Sky and Cardin: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!! THIS IS WAR!!!
Sky: DON'T FUCK WITH ME! I HAVE THE POWER OF OUM AND ANIME ON MY SIDE!!!
Cardin: THE WORLD IS NOT AS IT SEEMS! BIT CONNEEEEEEECT!!!
Sky: WHEN WILL YOU FRICKIN FRICKS LEARN?! WHEN WILL YOU LEARN? WHEN WILL YOU LEARN THAT YOUR ACTIONS HAVE CONSEQUENCES?!
"You either die a white knight or live long enough to become a thot slayer" ~Master Russel
Dove:
Accept this poem of mine
Of two men, taking a different line
Queens
They are not
If she breathes
She is a thot...
...
Sky: Heh, you should've gone for the head.
Cardin: Still, you can't hit me. I'm fast as fuck, boiiiiii.
CRDL: WE ARE NUMBER 1 EY!!!
Woo! Happy new years everyone!
You all have a blessing from this Sleepyhead Weeb!
Weeb-san out!