Rose and I spend the rest of the night eating ice cream and popcorn and Swedish fish. We watch 27 Dresses before Rose schools me on the art of blowjobs.
"Honestly, Bella, if you just suck it and move your hand up and down while looking at him, he'll blow his load in minutes which is good because it can get tiring after a while," Rose says easily, pulling her leggings up, getting ready for bed.
I'm sitting on the bed, hugging a pillow, thinking about what Edward would do if I did that. Would he want me to? Would he let me? Sometimes, after we go farther than we ever have before, he backs off and won't touch me for a while. He tells me he can't control himself. He tells me he's going to go too far.
I have a million more questions, but I think I just want to figure it out for myself, so I switch the subject.
"Where's Sam taking you tomorrow?" I ask, laying back.
Rose leans back with me and shrugs. "To the diner. Ice skating. Movies. Hopefully the backseat of his car. Where are you and Edward going? You can't exactly go out around here, right?"
I shake my head. "I'm not sure, honestly."
We're quiet for another minute before she asks a very valid question. "When are you going to tell Alice?"
I purse my lips and breathe deeply. "I have no freaking idea."
~!~
The next morning, over Eggos and chocolate milk, Edward texts to tell me he'll be at Rose's at 2 pm.
Where are we going? I ask.
It's a surprise, Valentine.
My heart sings and my smile shines and the butterflies in my belly stretch their wings. I put my phone down and spend the morning working with Rose on a paper for science. I'm almost done, and she's only written her introduction, when she slams her laptop shut with a "fuck this" and pulls me to her room where we shower and blast music and dance around in a towel. Her mom knocks to tell us goodbye as she heads off with her boyfriend. When we hear her mom's car reverse, Rose turns to me with mischievous eyes and a brow cocked.
"What?" I ask slowly.
"Let's get you ready!"
Rose does a good job of making me look like me, just much more enhanced. She blow dries my hair and sets it with large velcro rollers for volume. She brushes my face with dusty pigments and wet gloss on my lips. When she's done and I peek, I'm baffled. I love makeup, and I'm pretty good at it, but this is something else.
"Dang, Rose," I tell her, glancing at the shimmer on my lids and cheek bones and the pink tinge of my cheeks. My lashes are black and curly and flirty.
She laughs while tossing clothes on her bed. I try on dresses and skirts and tight pants before we agree on blue skinny jeans, a light pink sweater, and a pair of flats.
I turn around in her mirror and smile. Simple, classic, me.
It's just before one and Edward's knocking on the door. A few minutes prior, Edward texts me I love you, baby B and my heart climbs out of my chest to kiss my lips. Today is the day. I have never been happier.
"Bella," he says softly, brushing my shiny hair behind my ear. "Baby," he smiles.
"Yeah?" I'm bashful and nervous and suddenly unsure.
Edward's emerald eyes pierce and stalk as they fall to the gloss on my lips, and the freckle on my neck, and then the swell of my hips in these jeans. His smile is lazy, but his eyes are clear. Edward is sober and almost as happy as I am. I tell Rose I'll be back tomorrow afternoon before my parents pick me up and then grab Edward's waiting hand as he leads me to his car.
Edward opens my door and kisses my forehead as I climb into the front seat. I don't ask where we're going, and he doesn't tell me. When we merge onto the highway, Edward grips my knee and looks at me.
"This is it, B," he tells me. "All this time that we've waited," he grabs my hand and pulls it to his mouth, "all the secret kisses, all the private feelings, all the nights we spent alone in my room, it all lead up to this moment."
I smile and nod and blush and implode. If my heart beats any more erratically, this night's going to end in a hospital room and not my bedroom like I plan.
"Al left with Jake," Edward tells me easily. "He's an alright kid."
"Kid? He's your age."
He shrugs. "Doesn't feel like it."
I nod because I understand. Edward is so ahead of his peers academically, emotionally, and maturity wise.
"He wore a shirt and tie. Alice made fun of him. I told her to shut up."
"Sounds like Alice," I admit with a giggle.
"He brought her flowers and a stuffed animal. He shook my dad's hand. I think he really fucking likes her."
"I think she likes him too, Edward."
He nods as he turns up the radio. I wonder if he's thinking about how this breaks Jasper. I know I do, but then I think about how Jasper broke Alice.
~!~
We're in Port Angeles walking around town, hand in hand, perusing old bookstores and antique stores. We find the Kama Sutra and giggle through various pages.
"What about this?" I joke, pointing to The Candle.
"Fun," he tells me with a wink.
"You've done it?" I ask.
"Shower," he responds with a nod.
I squint and flip to another page. "What about the… Waterfall?"
"Oh yeah," he says lowly. "That's a real good one."
"Slope?"
"Oh, come on, B. Find a crazy one."
He's teasing but I'm jealous. All these girls and all these years of experience and now he's with a me and I've barely made it one lap into the race. I glance at him. His eyes are bright and loving and lusty. His pace might have been much faster than mine to begin, but he's slowed down enough to run at my pace, so I smile to myself and flip the pages again.
"Snow Angel?" I ask, smirking because it looks so stupid.
Relief overwhelms me when Edward laughs, too. "No," he explains, "not that one."
Edward scoots closer, if possible, and puts his hand on my lower back. "Show me one you want to try," he whispers.
I look up and expect to see a smirk or a teasing glance or anything but serious, but he is; he's serious and I'm getting turned on because he actually wants to know what I want to try with him. So, I take my time and flip through and imagine us in those positions. Breaths escape heavier, and when I linger on certain positions, Edward grunts or very quietly offers an "mmm" as I turn to the next page.
After a while, I settle on one and tell him, "this one."
"Yeah?" he asks seriously, looking at the position called The Captain.
"Yeah."
~!~
We talk about my mom's art work and Alice's attitude over dinner. I laugh louder than expected when he tells me about the time Alice used Nair instead of shampoo.
"No shit," Edward says. "My mom had to cut Al's hair short because the ends got burned off."
By now, I'm laughing so hard he's blurry from happy tears. I catch myself, trying to quiet down, but Edward looks at me with tenderness and tells me, "no one knows us here, B," and my smile is wide and soft and excited, and so I laugh louder.
~!~
It's cold, but warmer than it has been, so when Edward asks to walk around downtown, I agree. We pass by married couples, new couples, young couples, and old couples as they dine and celebrate love. Edward grabs my hand as we round the corner and follow the soft sounds of a guitar falling out of an open door of a local bar. We're too young to go in, but we stand outside and listen to the music.
"Your hair looks nice," he tells me as I lean against the brick wall behind us. He's in front of me with a smirk and his fingertips play with the ends of my hair.
"Rose put it in rollers," I tell him.
"Hm," he responds, moving his fingers from my hair to my exposed collar bone. "I like your sweater, too."
"Rose let me borrow it," I admit with a shrug. Its big up top so my the sweater slides down and my shoulder pops out.
Edward fingers my bra strap. "Black," he states.
I bite my lip. He pulls it slightly, letting it go with snap. It's dark, but I know his eyes are zeroed in on my hardening nipples. The unpadded lace does nothing to hide my excitement.
Edward surprises me as his lips crash into mine. My hands find his hips while one of his is on the wall behind me and the other grips my waist. Slow but powerful, his lips love mine. This kiss says everyone can see. This kiss is hungry.
When he pulls back, my lips are swollen and parted and my eyes are still closed.
"You ready?" he asks, grabbing my hand and pulling me from the wall.
"Mhm." And I definitely am.
~!~
On the ride home, Edward palms my inner thigh. His pinky finger is very, very close to the seem of my jeans, and when I shift my hips and slouch down, it rubs right where I'm hottest. I try to bite back a loud breath, but I can't as I feel his pinky press against my center once, twice, three times.
I close my eyes and lean back and love the feeling of his finger against me. It's not enough to get me off, but when he begins moving up and down in slow, short rubs, I breathe out a slow, steady sigh.
Too soon, he pulls his fingers away and I glance at him.
"If I start that now, I'm going to pull off into a ditch and finish it. That's not what I have planned for us tonight."
"What do you have planned, Edward?" I tease.
He glances at me with gentleness. "To love you."
"Oh," I say softly, obviously not expecting such a loving response after a heated petting session.
"And to taste every centimeter of skin on your body."
"Oh," I say again, breathily this time.
He grins knowing full well what his words do to me. I smile back because I can't wait.
We pull off the highway and back onto the empty streets of Forks.
"I'll park in my driveway," he tells me. "Alice won't be home yet. She won't see us. My parents went to dinner."
I nod. We're back home in forks where our secret isn't safe. Although we both know Alice is with Jake, I still shut my door softly. I still run across to my house. I still quietly and quickly open my front door and shut it so quietly when Edward power walks inside.
"We made it," he jokes.
I pull the curtains shut and turn the TV on.
"Actually," Edward starts, "let's go upstairs?" He's nervous and my heart beats in my throat again.
"Okay," I tell him, shutting off the TV, following him upstairs to my bedroom. He turns on my lamp, closes my curtains, and turns to look at me.
"What?" I ask after a few moments. He looks at me a lot, but tonight I'm self-conscious. I cross my arms over my chest and look away.
"You're so pretty, Bella."
"You're one to talk," I tell him, loosening my arms over my chest as he walks over to me.
"No, Bella, really. I've never met anyone like you."
I roll my eyes. "Edward, you're sixteen. You have, like, your whole life still. You haven't even met—"
"Shut up," he tells me with frustration.
"What?"
"Stop talking. Listen to me. When I say you're so fucking pretty it hurts, I don't just mean your looks, Bella. I mean, yeah, you're fucking hot, but your heart, your insides, they're so fucking pure. So good. You're caring and loving and selfless. At lunch you make sure everyone has what they need before you can relax. When Jas comes home all fucked up, your eyes are on him all night to make sure he doesn't fucking OD or something. When your dumb classmates are making fun of Mr. Miller's nose, the meanest teacher at Forks High, you stand up for him. When Jas breaks Al's heart, you squeeze her so hard your fingers turn white trying to distract her from the pain in her heart. You are the sweetest, gentlest, purest girl I've ever met, Bella, and I can't believe I'm corrupting you."
He steps closer and closer and looks at my neck when he tells me things that have been weighing him down. Hot, nervous breath touches my neck.
"Thank you, Edward, but you're not corrupting me," I tell him with annoyance. It's the same conversation over and over that always ends in Edward feeling like crap and not touching me for weeks.
"Tonight I am," he tells me gently as he strips my sweater off. His fingers grip my hips and backs me up to my bed. The back of my knees press against the mattress. "I've been reserved with you, Bella. Tonight I'm not."
Before I can even form words, he unbuttons my jeans and pulls them down. His eyes land on the black lace barely covering my center. Edward reaches around and grips my bottom roughly. He massages my cheeks with his fingers and when he slaps my right cheek, I screech a laugh. He chuckles too before he tells me to take off my jeans. I do and he pushes me back. Edward strips his shirt and pants off before kissing up my body.
"I love this freckle," he mumbles, kissing a small brown circle to the left of my belly button. He's up at my neck now, and when he scrapes his teeth against the delicate skin of my neck, I gasp and arch my back. He groans approval in my ear before stealing my lips in a kiss.
He rests his body on his left forearm and tickles his fingers across my soft, bare belly as his lips pluck at mine gently. I'm so beyond horny, so I wrap myself around his neck and give him more. He chuckles against my mouth. My eagerness spurs him on as his hand finds my breast through the lacy bra. He grips and pulls and tweaks before grabbing the cup and pulling down so hard that delicate lace rips.
My breast bounces and Edward's lips leave mine and attach to my nipple. I watch him and am infinitely more turned on. His eyes are hungry and his dick is hard against my thigh. I try to reach and rub, but he stops totally.
Edward's on his knees, his erection protrudes ridiculously from his boxer briefs. Fingers grip the sides of my undies and shimmy down slowly. Green eyes meet mine. This isn't the first time Edward's seen me, but tonight feels different.
He lays back down, head supported by his left hand as his right cups my center. His palm is warm and wet from my excitement. I can smell myself and the second I close my eyes, Edward spreads my lips and waits. I count to seven before I look at him and when I do, Edward presses one small, tight circle around my clit and my hips shift higher. He does it twice more before stopping again.
My breaths come in short and sharp. I'm turned on and pissed off that he's messing around when I so clearly need it. The second I open my mouth to protest, he takes a finger and drags it slowly up and down my slit.
"Oh, god," I gasp, spreading my legs wider as he does it over and over. He dips his finger in me and keeps it there, pressing down and I feel so full that I gasp again.
Just as I thought we were getting somewhere, Edward pulls back quickly and when I open my eyes, Edward has his finger in his mouth and his eyes on mine. I suck in a breath as his eyes close. I can see the hollows of his cheeks as he tastes me against the sensitive pad of his pointer.
He's moving before his eyes are even open. He's between my legs, face inches from my center, and when he pulls my hips upward, scooting my bottom closer, I can feel his breath down there. My legs are thrown over his shoulders, his arms are around my thighs and hips as he pulls the mound above my center up from the top exposing me deliciously.
His eyes smolder green, and I can't look away. He flattens his tongue and swipes from top to bottom slowly, testing me. Each time his tongue tickles my clit, my hips shake, and I cry out. He licks once, slower than before, and as he reaches my clit, his tongue strikes rapidly.
I fall back, unable to keep looking, and grip the sheets.
"Oh my god," I cry out.
Edward tastes me forever. His tongue spreads me. His left hand reaches up to squeeze my nipple, and my hand finds the abandoned one. I feel so much. I feel too much. My free hand tangles in Edward's gelled locks. My teeth are clenched. I'm so close, but I'm not there. This sensation is so different. It's too much. I feel like crying as his tongue flicks and flicks and his fingers grip and pluck.
"Edward, yes," I moan, arching and mewling and gripping. "Edward, I—" and then his right hand spreads my lips and his tongue pistons inside of me. "Edward!" I yell. He pulls back, looks up, and attaches his lips to my clit. I'm there. I'm falling. My eyes are squeezed so tight I see white. I'm off the bed. I'm starfished. My knees squeeze his head. His hands grab my thighs to spread and fight against me. He milks me with slow, soft, gentle kisses where I'm over heightened and so sensitive.
My center pulses and races and I'm so lightheaded.
Edward kisses so gently I don't even feel him, so I let him and when I'm not so sensitive, he does it again. And Again.
~!~
It's hours later, and I'm laying on Edward's chest. We're silent as I enjoy the steady thump of his heartbeat, the reason I smile, the lifeline of my lover.
My room smells like heat and me.
His fingers gently brush my hair and rub my back and whisper love through my skin. I feel it sink into my veins and mix with my blood and spread to every organ and artery and cell in my body.
Edward consumes me, and I wonder if this is what Alice felt with Jasper or Rose feels with Sam.
A little while later, I break our silence. "Where'd you learn all that, Edward?"
He stops, fingers tangled in my tresses, and pulls my hair down so I'm looking at him. Instead of answering, he kisses my nose and the sides of lips. His lips tease mine and I smile against him. When he finally decides I can have them, I take the lead. My lips tease and play and bite. I run my hand down his bare his chest to the tent in his boxers, and this is it.
Just like he did, I climb between his legs. I pull his boxers down past his hips and out pops his erection. I grip and spit like he taught me. His eyes are on me and I wonder if he remembers what I said yesterday. Of course he remembers; he's a sixteen-year-old boy.
Edward's eyes are horny-hazy and half lidded. Tonight, I'm his drug and he's high off me. His lips part and I watch the pink of his tongue, the same tongue that's been tasting me all night, lick those pretty, pouty lips.
I'm done teasing. I want to taste him, so I bend down, too scared to glance at him, and run my tongue from base to tip.
Edward grunts and his muscles tighten, and his hips jerk ever so slightly. He's holding back. I do it again and again and giggle when he lets out a strangled, "fuuuck."
Emboldened, my fist wraps around the base, and my lips kiss the head. His hips jerk and the head hits against my lips. He's grunting and breathing heavily, and his hand wraps around my forearm for support.
I wrap my lips all the way around the head and my tongue circles. He's salty and hot and just so Edward. His resolve crumples when I take him further into my mouth.
"Yes," he hisses.
I wet his shaft, remove my hand from the base, and do as Rose instructed: suck it and look at him. My cheeks are hallowed, I have about half in before he's at the back of my throat, and as I cough, Edward chokes out a, "Jesus Fuck."
His eyes never leave my lips, but mine close as I grip the base again and slurp up and down. I twirl my tongue and twist my head and when Edward grips my hair I do it faster.
"I'm coming, fuck, move Bella," he warns.
But I don't because I want this. His hips jerk and his thighs are tense. With a taught stomach, he sits up slightly, gripping my hair, trying to pull me away, but the faster I go the looser his hand is and then everything swells so much I almost choke and then I definitely do because warm liquid shoots quite literally down my throat. His cock pulses hard, but I'm sucking more and more and then he pushes me off and his cock bounces out of my swollen lips and slaps against his stomach. I swallow everything he gives me, and it wasn't as nasty as Rose led me to believe, but maybe that's because it's Edward's.
"Holy shit," he breathes.
"Was that okay?" I'm self-conscious suddenly.
He chuckles, catching his breath. "Yeah," he says, pulling me down. "Yeah it was okay."
A little while later, we're back to where we started. My head on his chest, his fingers in my hair.
"Hey, B?"
"Hm?" I answer sleepily.
"Remember the first day I met you and you thought jizz was a snack?"
I play slap his arm. "Shut it!"
He's laughing and laughing as I slap his chest. "Did you like your snack, Pretty?"
~!~
The next morning, Edward and I wake up to the sound of my phone ringing. I scramble to my desk and see it's Alice.
"Hello?" I answer.
"What's up, Hoe?" she asks with a giggle.
"What's up with you? Why are you calling so early?"
"It's almost noon, Bella! How late did you and Rose stay up last night?"
My eyes bug and pull my phone to check the time. It's 11:51 am and I scurry around to gather my clothes.
"I guess later than we thought. What are you up to?" I ask. It's my room and I can pick whatever I want to wear, but I'm so crazed that I throw on the jeans and sweater I wore last night. I mouth "get up" to Edward who's already sitting at the edge of my bed.
"Mom and I went to the store. Do you want to come over later and make cookies?"
I stop everything.
"You want to bake? Who are you and what have you done with Alice?"
She laughs. "I don't know, I just feel like it."
"I'll ask when my parents pick me up. Can I text you later?"
"Okay talk to you later," she says before whispering, "I have so much to tell you!" and hanging up.
"It's almost noon, Edward. Your mom and sister are at the store. Hurry so we can leave before they get back!" I throw his sweater at him as he pulls his jeans up.
We sneak out of my house quietly and cross our yards to his car.
Edward has one hand on my lower back and his wet lips on my cheek as he pulls the passenger door open for me when we hear, "Hey, kiddo, do you want to go with me to—" and then his dad stops abruptly as he turns to see his son's lips on his daughter's best friend's cheek.
My heart beats so fast I can't breathe. Tears well in my eyes. Everything we've done to keep our secret. Everything we've done to protect ourselves, Jasper, Alice…
Edward blows a slow, heavy breath from his lips. It sounds like relief, but I can't be sure.
"Dad," Edward says slowly.
His dad breathes in and out steadily. He's a statue on the porch but his eyes survey our lack of movement. He's looking for any crack in our resolve. Edward takes my hand in his, showing his dad what this is. What we are. What we have been.
Mr. Cullen sighs and takes the steps down from the porch slowly to stands in front of us. I can't read his thoughts and his face gives nothing away. I'm shaking inside and out. He senses this. Mr. Cullen purses his lips and nods slowly. He puts his right hand on Edward's shoulder and squeezes my upper arm with his other.
"I take it Alice doesn't know?" he says with a gentleness I'd only expect from him.
"No one does," Edward says.
"How long?" Mr. Cullen asks.
"Since we moved here," Edward blows an honest, relieved answer.
Mr. Cullen nods again. He's silent but his eyes say do you know what you're doing? and you've put me in a tough spot and I'm not surprised.
"You better get going then. Esme and Alice will be home soon." Mr. Cullen offers the smallest smile.
"Are you going to…" I start with a nervous, shaky breath.
"No," he says, shaking his head, "but I will have to tell Esme."
"What about my parents?" This time, I'm fear stricken. "If you tell them I won't be able to—"
Edward wraps his arm around my shoulder and kisses my temple. Tears that have been burning the back of my throat fall from my eyes and mouth in gasps of enormous relief and torrential fear that someone knows.
"No," he says definitely, "No. I promise it'll be up to you when you tell everyone, but we'll have to set some boundaries at our house."
Edward and I both nod as we quickly get in his car. Not much is said on the ride to Rose's. I don't cry, but I want to.
Edward can sense this as he grabs my hand and squeezes.
"Of all the people, he's the one we'd want to know first," Edward says, trying his best to calm my fervent emotions.
I nod subconsciously. Is he the first domino to fall? Am I glad this happened?
What if it had been Alice? Or my mom? Or worse, my dad? What would we have done? What if Mr. Cullen decides to tell my parents? They'll never let me see Edward or Alice again. He promised, though. He wouldn't break a promise, right?
This lie. This secret we've kept up. This secret we've kept from everyone in our lives is getting to be too much.
I think about all the ways Alice could find out. How hasn't she found out already? The not so secret touches at our lockers. The not so innocent glances at lunch. The sneaking away together every sleepover.
We're at Rose's now and Edward leans over to kiss me one last time.
"Love," he reminds.
"Same," I whisper lightly.
~!~
I tell Rose everything and she responds with, "I knew I always liked Mr. Cullen. What a DILF."
I laugh as I pack up my away bag. It's nearing 1:30, and mom and dad will be here any minute.
"Maybe he's right, Bella. Maybe it's time to tell her?"
"She'll hate me."
"You don't know that."
I nod vehemently. Before I can argue further, my mom's calling to tell me she's here. I hug Rose bye and thank her for everything. I can't take secret keeping for granted anymore. She winks. She's so Rose.
My parents seem relaxed and gentle as they hold hands and ask about my weekend. I tell them we watched movies and ate pizza and worked on school projects.
They both nod in acceptance as we turn into the driveway. I hold my breath. Did I return everything to its spot? Did I turn off all the lights? Did I lock the door? Will they know?
Dad's inside, beer in hand, feet on the coffee table before I even have my shoes off. All seems good. Mom starts laundry and Alice calls to ask if I can come over. I don't want to face Mr. Cullen, but I really want to see Alice, so I chance it and ask my mom.
"We haven't seen you all weekend," she protests.
"I know," I tell her not even bothering to put up a fight.
"Let her go, honey," Dad calls from the living room. I'm taken by such surprise that I can't even form thankful words.
Mom smiles and nods. "Go on," she says gently.
~!~
When Alice invited me over to make cookies, I thought we'd open a package, place pre-made dough on a cookie sheet, and watch The Office while they baked. But, when I arrive, Alice has all the ingredients out to make Snickerdoodles from scratch.
"They're Jake's favorite," she explains, and I nod with excited understanding.
Mr. and Mrs. Cullen are out shopping and Edward's in the basement with Jasper. I feel safe for now.
Alice mixes the dry with the wet ingredients as she tells me about her date.
"He brought me flowers and a teddy bear and kissed me so sweetly that my lips almost fell off, Bella. He held my hand. He opened the door for me. He didn't once ask me what color my underwear was."
I chuckle loudly. "Well, I guess that's sweet, right?"
Alice beams and I'm happy she found someone to appreciate her. I'm glad she found someone willing to change for her.
Jasper walks slowly up the steps and smiles. Jasper's presence calms me. His eyes are soft and his demeaner is accepting. Today, the circles under his eyes aren't so dark. He's getting better, and I feel the last thing I want to feel: hopeful.
I offer a small smile.
"Hi girls," he says softly, pausing in the kitchen.
"Hey Jas," I say happily.
"Hi," Al says quickly.
"Baking cookies?" he asks. Jas hasn't been this optimistic since he got to see his mom for the first time after being taken from her.
"For Jake," Alice announces loudly, snapping her head to meet his gaze.
Jas smiles sadly with understanding. "I'm sure he'll love them." Jasper's warm, gentle voice makes my eyes sting. His eyes and mind are clear today. I want to tell him I'm proud.
Keep trying my smile says but when Jasper turns to head upstairs, Alice's "why can't he take the hint that I don't fucking love him anymore?" erases all hope.
"You sure?" I challenge.
Her response is a big doughball plopped onto a cookie sheet.
It's after four and it's Alice, me, and Edward in the basement. Jasper's been MIA since earlier. She's flipping through the channels and Edward's texting me from the far side of the couch.
Hey Pretty.
Hi ya handsome.
Wanna know a secret?
I don't know. Do I?
Yes.
Okay, tell me your secret, Edward.
You have the prettiest fingernails and you give the best head I've ever had in my whole entire fucking life.
I giggle and Alice asks, "what's so funny?"
"Rose said Sam's dick is hairy." It's not a lie. She did say that… earlier.
"That's the worst," Al agrees.
"Did you say dick, Baby B?" Edward mocks. He's heard me say it before. His tease reddens my cheeks and I bite my lips together.
"She's not twelve anymore, Edward. Don't be a fucking asshole." Alice is more protective as she's ever been the last few weeks, and I'm not sure why. Does she sense something? Am I not trying as hard? Have we been complacent in our friendship? Are we slipping? No, we can't. I won't let it.
"No, she's not twelve anymore, you're right," Edward starts, sitting up straighter. He goes to open his mouth, Alice is all ears, but Mr. Cullen walks down the stairs and none of us will ever hear what Edward was ready to say.
"Your mother and I brought home dinner. Bella, honey, we got some for you, too."
I want to say no because oh my god what if this is it. He's getting the whole family together and he's going to tell Alice. My heart beats quicker. Blood swims faster in my veins and pounds in my head.
Mr. Cullen must notice as he says, "You don't want to miss Alice's story about her first date with Jake, right?"
Alice scoffs and says, "as if I didn't already tell her, dad. And it wasn't our first date," as she runs past him up the stairs.
Edward stands and so do I.
Mr. Cullen gives me a promising smile.
So, here were are, Alice and I sitting side by side at the dinner table across from my not-as-secret boyfriend and his recovering bestie with their parents at either end watching the way Edward smiles when I spill alfredo sauce on my chin and down my shirt.
"Jeez," I say nervously, "can't take me anywhere."
The boys laugh and Alice goes to lick it off. I bat her away with a napkin and glance at Mrs. Cullen who looks at me with honey, we've known eyes.
Jasper watches me and glances at his pseudo-parents and back to me. He's putting the pieces together. My brow arches when it dawns on him. He gives me a nod and picks at his pasta.
Mr. and Mrs. Cullen talk about college and what the boys want to do.
"Not sure," Jasper says. "I guess I never thought I had a chance."
Alice stops, her fork clanks on the glass plate. "You don't if you keep shoving shit down your throat."
Jasper meets her eyes and sits up straighter. "I stopped," he admits. "I'm clean," he says.
Alice rolls her eyes and scoffs. "Yeah, for how long?"
I grab her hand and put pressure on her fingers. Let it go. It's not your problem. I might be the only one who thinks that Alice's anger proves lingering feelings, though.
Mr. Cullen, irritated with his daughter's condescension, says, "Jasper is a part of this family just as you are. We clothe him. We feed him. We love him. He has as much of a future as you do, Alice. You will not make this a hostile environment any longer. Grow up."
We're silent. Alice's dad has never reprimanded her in such a manner as he has now, at least not in front of me. Again, Alice rolls her eyes and picks up her fork to play with her food.
Edward clears his throat and looks right at me. "Maybe he wants to come to U Dub with me?" he says aloud but what he really means is, "I want to go to U Dub, B, and I want you to come, too."
I smile and nod faintly. I haven't thought much about my future. I'm still young, but I'd follow him anywhere.
"Maybe," Jas says.
"Maybe you'll get a basketball scholarship," I offer as blandly as I can.
"That's the plan," Edward says with a smirk.
Mr. and Mrs. Cullen exchange smiles. They're proud that they raised good kids. Good kids with attitudes, but good kids all the same.
"What about you, Al?" I ask.
She shrugs. "Pre-Med. Maybe."
"I could see that," I tell her, bumping her elbow with mine.
"Me, too," Mr. Cullen says with a smile.
"I think maybe I'll be a teacher," I offer. "Or a Vet. Or maybe something with Criminal Justice."
I earn laughter and Mrs. Cullen says, "you've got plenty of time to narrow it down, sweetie."
~!~
Alice turns sixteen and fails her permit test. Her mom says she should have studied, so we spend the next two weeks with our noses in the book. I'll be taking the test in a few months, so it doesn't hurt to study now.
Alice passes the second time and dad jokingly says, "I'm not sure I like knowing she'll be out on the road."
I'm not sure what happened on their little Valentine's Day trip, and quite frankly I don't want to know, but dad returned with patience and a sense of humor.
"It'll be me soon," I tell him as we stand on the front porch and watch Mr. Cullen teach Alice about the break and gas pedals, windshield wipers, mirrors, and defrosters.
"I know!" Alice yells. "Let's go already!"
Dad puts his arm around me and says, "don't remind me."
~!~
"Please!" Alice begs.
"Absolutely not," Edward says vehemently.
"PLEASE!" she begs louder.
"No, Alice. You ran over two curbs in dad's car already." Edward stands and moves to the far end of the table.
All of lunch, Alice berates and begs Edward to let her drive home from school. Edward's Honda is his baby, and I don't blame him. Not only is it dangerous, but it's illegal. Still, Alice pouts. I try to refrain from rolling my eyes, but when Rose catches me, her brows knit together.
"Stupid idiot brother," Al grumbles under her breath. She leans back in her chair and Jake throws his arm around her.
"I'll let you drive the truck, babe," Jake offers.
"Really?" Alice says excitedly. "Like, today? Right after school?"
"Sure, why not. It's Friday, my dad's out fishing, we'll get some alone time back at my house," Jake says, waggling his brows.
"Fuck yeah!" Alice exclaims.
"Al, how am I supposed to get home?" I ask.
"Come with us!"
"To your alone time, no thanks! Plus. If my dad catches me, I'll never be allowed to hang out with you again."
"I'll take you," Edward pipes up from down the table.
My stomach somersaults and I do my best to hide the smile curving my lips.
"You sure?" I ask with no protest.
"We're practically going to the same place." He rolls his eyes in an annoying-big-brother way. When I agree, and Alice smiles and nods, Edward throws me a smirk.
It's the last class of the day when Edward texts me.
Think you can tell your mom you're hanging out with Rose after school?
When I ask my mom, she says Okay, honey.
So, here we are, in Edward's car. Alone.
"Where's Jasper?"
"With Bree."
"Where are we going?"
"I'm taking my girlfriend out on a Friday night."
His hand is on my knee and I'm excited-nervous and steady as he grips me and holds me and kisses my knuckles.
We drive back to Port Angeles and eat an early dinner. We walk to the movie theatre, hand in hand, and lets me pick the movie. I'm popping Reese's Pieces in my mouth when his arm slithers around my shoulders. The theater is practically empty, but I slouch lower just in case. Edward's lips kiss the top of my head, sharing love and boasting exhilaration.
Out with my boyfriend on a Friday night, I feel birthday-morning-thrilled, summer-time free, and brilliantly blissful.