Chapter 17

"What to do with a whiny Zetsu?"

Sakura could feel the rain letting up a bit, and looked towards the sky. Little patches of blue were showing through the blanket of dark grey; the storm was passing. There was still the cold wind blowing through, but she could tolerate that far better than being drenched.

She felt Madara shift slightly in her arms. She had not looked at his face, as he had his chin resting on her shoulder. He'd become silent for a while now, but she could hear his breathing had become calm and even. She slowly ran her fingers through his hair, starting from the top and working her way down, and then repeating the action over and over again. It seemed to sooth him, as he sighed quietly to himself as she worked her fingers through the dark and soft strands.

After a little time had passed he finally pulled away, still kneeling down, but dropped his other knee to rest on both. He met her eyes with his, they were glassy, and his cheeks were red and tearstained, but his expression was one of relief; the relief of finally unloading a 10-year burden off his shoulders in the arms of the only person to tell him he didn't have to carry it anymore.

She pulled her sleeve past her hand and smiled warmly at him while reaching over to gently wipe the residual tears from his cheeks. He returned her smile and leaned in, kissing her tenderly on her forehead. He chuckled a little as he pulled away. "I probably look horrible right now." He mused, grunting as he got up from the grass. He held out a hand to her. Sakura grasped it in her and he pulled her to her feet. Her legs felt like they had started going to sleep, kneeling on the ground for so long. The irritating tingly sensation started creeping through them. Opting to try and ignore the feeling in her legs, she turned towards the weeping willow that Izuna was buried under.

"This is a really beautiful tree." She said. Madara followed her eyes where they were looking, and nodded in agreement.

"It really is. My older brother chose this spot, Izuna had a weeping willow carved into his guitar, after all. It seemed to fit him."

It seemed, at least to Sakura, that Fugaku Uchiha had never reached out to his younger brother, Madara. She wondered why that was, they both had lost their little brother, but for all these years, Madara carried the burden on his own. From growing up with Sasuke, she knew his parents. His mom was nice enough, but his dad was always really hard on Sasuke and his brother Itachi; holding them to ridiculous standards. Its probably why Itachi became a police officer, even though it didn't really fit his personality.

Madara interrupted her thoughts by pulling her into a hug, he whispered in her ear, "Thank you…".

Her heart did a flip, his voice was so warm and gentle, grateful. She hugged him as tight as she could, and Madara turned his head to gaze on Izuna's headstone. He spoke as if Izuna was standing in front of them.

"And YOU always saidI couldn't get a woman unless I paid for one." He remarked. Sakura laughed out loud. She wondered, the times when Madara would come here by himself, if he talked with Izuna like this. Madara looked at the sky and turned back to her.

"Its going to get dark soon…should we head back?" He asked, fastening the top button of his peacoat. Sakura nodded and wrapped her arm around his as they slowly made their way back to the path. As they were walking away, they didn't notice the bluebird that had come down from the willow to quietly perch on Izuna's headstone.

She noticed, even though it was so subtle, that Madara seemed different on their walk back. He smiled, and this time, it looked similar to the smile he had in the picture she saw in his hallway. Like something impossibly heavy had been taken off his back, he seemed…happy, content even. She smiled to herself as they reached the path; she hoped that smile would always stay.

They reached the truck shortly thereafter, Madara unlocked the doors and Sakura climbed into the passenger's seat, but decided to shift to the middle seat to be closer to him. She fastened her seatbelt and waited for Madara to turn the keys so she could flip on the heater. When he jumped into the driver's seat she noticed he had his cell phone out. While scrolling though some things with his thumb he simultaneously buckled his seatbelt and turned on the truck. Sakura flipped the heater on, but it would take a few moments before hot air would come through. She turned towards Madara, who was still looking at his phone. "Are you texting somebody?" She asked curiously.

Madara shrugged, typing something in and shutting the screen off. He shifted the truck into reverse and then pulled away from the cemetery gates, then accelerated on to the road.

"Obito texted me. Said he and Rin had "big news" and that he would tell me in when I returned to work tomorrow but who knows…"

Sakura nodded, but wondered what big news it could be. "Could it really be a big deal?"

Madara laughed, "I wouldn't know, Obito and I have different definitions for what a "big deal" means. He called me at midnight one time, frantic because he found a spider in a pallet of bananas and mangos and was certain it was a deadly "Brazilian Wandering Spider"…and of course, it was a simple garden spider, sooo..."

Sakura giggled at the thought of Obito frantically calling Madara because he was scared of spiders. She leaned over and rested her head against Madara's arm, letting the heat from the dashboard wash over her, she closed her eyes and relished the feeling. Today had been a long day, but she couldn't think of a person she would rather spend it with. She sighed and posed a question to him out of the blue, "Would it be safe to assume that I'm your girlfriend now?" She asked tentatively.

Madara looked at her with his eyebrow raised and then burst out laughing. Sakura didn't expect that response, and wondered why. Madara's shoulders shook in genuine mirth as Sakura looked on, confused. She didn't mean that as a joke. Hey what gives? After taking a minute to gather himself, he flicked his eyes to her again. "I don't think you should even have to ask at this point…but YES, heh, its safe to assume that, Sakura." He gently pulled her head to his and gave her a kiss on the temple, still keeping his eyes on the road.

"Well you don't ever say things!" She protested. She was about to add something else, then she noticed that Madara had taken an offramp, towards another backroad heading back into Konaha. "Where are we going?" She asked, perplexed. Madara glanced at her with a coy grin on his face. "There is a spot on this road that drops pretty steeply." He said mysteriously.

Sakura didn't know what he meant at first, then it dawned on her. "Wait, WAIT. Why are we speeding up?" She started gripping the fabric of the seat with her hands. "How steep is this hill?"

Madara's grin was now accompanied by a mischievous laugh. "Izuna and I used to take this road back when he first bought this truck. The hill was the best part."

Sakura started feeling anxious, she didn't like the fact that Madara was not being specific. "M-Madara, I don't like steep drops!"

"Hey, you wanted me to share with you, I'm trying to share with you! !" He laughed as he kicked the truck into a different gear and accelerated.

There was no oncoming traffic, but Sakura could see the steep decline coming up ahead in the road. "NO NO NO! THIS IS SCARY!" She screamed, grabbing Madara's arm in a panic. But Madara seemed to find it hilarious as he sped up, now going about 85. "MADARA YOU'RE GOING TO CRAAAASH!"

"I KNOW MY TRUCK!" He yelled over the sound of the roaring engine. Sakura screamed as they reached the steep hill, and the truck went airborne about two feet from the ground. Sakura screamed, her stomach feeling like it was in her throat, while Madara laughed damn near maniacally, his arm around her shoulders in a tight grip. The truck hit the road, and Madara expertly maneuvered to slow down and pull off the side of the road, kicking a large cloud of dirt into the air.

Madara threw the truck into park and and leaned back, panting and laughing. He turned to look at Sakura, who's eyes were wide as dinner plates and her mouth hanging open in pale terror. That made him crack up again. "You should see your face right now!" He commented through his laughter. Sakura turned and met his gaze with blank stare.

When her frozen expression of terror didn't change, Madara felt a small ping of concern. He unbuckled his seatbelt, leaned over, and started planting quick kisses on her lips, forehead and cheeks. That made Sakura come to her senses and she started giggling while trying to push him away, but shifted his body until he was straddling her legs. reaching down he pulled the lever under the seat and it tilted back until Sakura was horizontal under him. Still planting kisses all over her face, he started chuckling along with her. She still tried to push him off playfully but he was obviously much stronger.

"You okay? *kiss* huh, huh? *kiss* tell me! *kiss*" He followed every word with another kiss and Sakura felt like if he continued she wasn't going to be able to catch her breath. Finally, he seized his "attack" and sat up, still straddling her thighs. She slowly started catching her breath, which was difficult with all the giggling she was still doing. He gazed down at her and smiled. "No, really, you okay?" He asked. She nodded and reached up to poke his cheek playfully with her finger.

"That was absolutely terrifying…can we go again?" She said with a smirk.

Madara felt a shiver run through his body and he raised his eyebrows at her, his cheeks had a slightly pink tinge to them. He bent down, his face an inch from hers. "…As many times as you want…" He said huskily. She felt a similar shiver at his words, and wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him into a kiss. He sighed into it and pressed his hips against hers. It was difficult with so little room but he seemed to manage. She slipped her tongue past his lips and caressed his mouth in a sensual rhythm. She could feel he was already getting aroused as he pressed against her lower region. Bucking her hips upward, she heard him groan as he kissed her neck, grazing his teeth against her skin. She gasped as the sensation sent signals all the way down into her nether region.

A buzzing sound went off in Madara's coat pocket, but he ignored it, focusing all his attention on the pink-haired beauty beneath him. The buzzing eventually stopped and he thought nothing of it. But before he could continue, the buzzing resumed its rude intrusion on their activity. He let his head fall on her chest and grunted in frustration. Sitting up, he fished his phone out of his pocket. It was Obito. He slid the "answer" button over and held the phone to his ear. "HOLY CRAP, WHAT DO YOU WANT?"

Sakura sat patiently beneath him. She watched his expression of frustration turn to confusion, and as the Obito continued talking, it turned to wide-eyed panic.

"Wait, what? Why is SHE there?…Is Hashirama there? AND Tobirama? WHY?"

He paused to let Obito continue, and he dragged a hand over his face in exasperation. When Obito stopped talking, he sighed deeply. "Ugh…You know she did this on purpose. I take the same day off every year. Why is Hashirama there?…damage control? What does that mean? …oh. Okay, okay…I'm still driving, give me about 15."

He looked down at Sakura and mouthed the word "sorry" to her. Sakura nodded her understanding silently, and waited for Madara to shift his body back over to the driver's seat so she could return to hers. She could hear Obito say something else on the phone, but it muffled. Madara smacked the steering wheel with his free hand. "Zetsu's with her? Shit…this is going to be nightmare…I hate that sniveling little mama's boy…alright, I'll see you soon." He ended the phone call and sighed, looking over at Sakura.

"I'm sorry about this..I have to get down to the store."

Sakura felt a twinge of disappointment in her gut, but she didn't show it. Putting on her best smile she leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. "Its okay, we can wait." She said, hoping her tone didn't betray her disappointment.

Madara threw the truck into drive, and pulled out onto the road, going a little faster than normal. He tapped the steering wheel with fingers, like a drum sequence. "Uh..thank you for coming with me today. Its stupid how it ended, but, that's on them, not you." She looked over at him, his eyebrows furrowed with frustration. What a way to end a really rough day. She didn't know who "they" were though.

"Who is Kaguya and Zetsu?" She inquired.

Madara scoffed dryly. "The bane of my existence. Other than Hashirama, that is. She's the COO of the company that owns this store chain, and her son, Zetsu, is her "personal assistant"…though, I've never seen another PA with a six-figure a year salary." The tone he had while speaking of those two was riddled with spite.

Sakura coughed slightly to interject,"Um, what are they like that makes them so bad?"

Madara looked over at her like she just asked him to explain the meaning of life to her. Then he started laughing to himself. "Oh, oh you'll see, eventually. Don't stand too close to Zetsu, he has a way of slinking up to people and I'm sure he's part-goo. How that Kaguya procreated is beyond me, but I have theories. Back when Hashirama and I were assistant managers at the same store, we even made a flow chart trying to figure that one out."

Sakura chuckled at that, but the look on Madara's face told her he was dead serious. She wondered if one them still had that chart…

"And what of Kaguya?" She pressed further. Madara stopped at a light, then turned left, heading to her apartment complex.

"I..that one is hard to explain. She's very wealthy, paranoid, conniving, and if she looks you in the eye, you wonder if snakes might start sprouting from her white hair and then you die."

"That's dramatic." Mused Sakura in response to Madara's colorful description.

Madara thought about it for a moment. "Okay, maybe no snakes, but she's a ball-crushing bitch."

When Madara pulled up to Sakura's apartment complex, she unbuckled her seatbelt and turned to say goodbye to him. He curled his fingers in her coat and gently pulled her into a warm kiss. She loved the way his lips felt against her own. When he finally pulled away, he gave her a sincere and kind smile. "Will you be here later tonight?" He asked. Sakura thought about it for a second, then nodded with a grin. "I'll be in the shower…" She said with a coy grin. Madara raised his eyebrows, watching her hop down to the sidewalk. He cleared his throat, "Yikes, okay, I will try to make this detour short."

"I hope so!" She said cheekily, shutting the door and turning to walk back to her apartment. Pulling out her keys from her coat pocket, she felt a buzz from her phone against her hand. When she got to her apartment door she unlocked it, while looking at her phone. It was a text from Madara.

"Thanks. Now I won't be able to walk straight."

She laughed outlaid and texted back a single "3" in response and put her phone down on the kitchen counter. She walked into her bedroom and practically fell onto her lavender scented bed. Today was an exhausting day, even more so for Madara. How unfair it was that he had to jump right back into business affairs after such a draining day. But he seemed different when they left the cemetery, even getting that phone call from Obito didn't cause the reaction she imagined it would have. As she pondered that thought, she drifted into a light doze. I wonder how long this is going to take at the store…

Madara pulled into the parking lot of his store and grabbed an empty parking spot up front. After he parked the truck and got out, he mentally prepared himself for the coming shitstorm. Kaguya never visited the stores in this district. That was beneath her. For her to show up now, with Hashirama and Tobirama no less…she was up to something…

Obito met him at the doors, looking flustered and yet relieved at the same time, "Oh good, you're back!" He said, seeming way too happy to see him. "You have no idea what's been going on since you left." Madara stared blankly at him.

"I'm sure you'll fill me in on all the horrors. Now what Hashirama doing-…oh speak of the devil.."

Hashirama walked out from the store, stopping at Madara and smiling, but it was very much a forced smile, and Madara could tell. Without mincing words he barked at him. "What the hell is going on, Hashirama? Why is the entire peanut gallery in my store?"

Hashirama suddenly became very serious. He leaned over, talking in a whisper, "Kaguya has been pulling some pretty underhanded maneuvers with corporate. I can't prove it, but I'm pretty sure she's in some backdoor dealings with our competitors to force our company into a leveraged buyout."

Madara raised an eyebrow at him, "Why would she want to do that?"

Hashirama pulled Obito over so that he could hear too, "I think there's a lot of money to be made if she pulls this off. But that means getting stores closed down, forcing the company into a corner, it is publicly traded after all. She's eyeing your store, and Tobirama's store. That's why she's here, she wants to see everything for herself, with that thing she calls a son."

Obito scratched his head and rolled his eyes. "Why can't I ever have a normal day here? So what do we do now?"

Before Hashirama could answer, a greasy-looking man with slicked-back dark hair approached them. Madara cringed slightly. "Ah, Zetsu…"

Obito leaned over and whispered in Madara's ear, "I told you we don't spray for pests enough…"

Zetsu Black, son and personal assistant of Kaguya, was a seedy, stick-figure like man, with the creepiest smile any of the three had ever seen. According to Hashirama, every time Zetsu looked at a person, it almost as if he was gauging how best to exploit them. But Madara was not having it today.

"What do you want, mama's boy?" He barked at the creepy little man.

Zetsu sneered back at him, and it looked as if he was licking his teeth. "Oh, Madara, you know to address me by Mr. Black, respect your betters, you know."

Madara smiled back at him, "When I see someone better than me, I'll treat them as such. You, however, are just "Whiny Zetsu" to me. Answer my question."

Zetsu seemed to move like a disturbing viscous blob, slinking up to Madara and the other two, but being sure to get as close to Madara as possible to rack up the discomfort factor. "Aww…did we have a bad day, Madara? You're so touchy. Obito told me you were off today, visiting your dead brother? You still cry over that?"

Hashirama inhaled sharply and grabbed Madara just his hand came up.

"Okay, we're going…over here now. Obito, can you take Zetsu Black and meet Kaguya upstairs?" He said hurriedly, holding onto the collar of Madara's shirt. Madara had a most disturbing smile on his face, pulling against Hashirama's grip.

Obito half led, half pushed Zetsu back into the store. When Hashirama was sure his store manager wouldn't take off after them, he released his grip and Madara straightened his collar, his devious smile still on his face, but now accompanied by a equally sinister snickering. "Heh heh, I'm gonna kill him, Hashirama, I'll make it look like an accident…" He murmured in-between his cackling. Hashirama patted him on the back, which made him bristle.

"Madara you know better than anyone how badly that pissant wants you to get fired. He's just aching for you to put a hand on him, in front of a camera. Promise me, you won't lay a finger on him, no matter what provocation he uses." Hashirama pleaded with him.

Madara folded his arms and took a deep breath. But he was tapping his fingers on his arm, indicating he was still fuming. "FINE. It's fine." He snapped. "But do me one favor, and you owe me this one. Which car out here is his?"

Hashirama furrowed his eyebrows, briefly confused about the request, then realization hit him and he sighed deeply. "…Madara, come on, do you really think that's a good id-"

"ITS A GREAT IDEA! NOW TELL ME." Madara deadpanned.

Hashirama threw his hands up in resignation. "You're going to get ME into trouble now. Sigh…blue Range Rover, in the right hand side. Has custom blue leather seats."

Madara smiled broadly, his mind already working. "Go get me a pair of pliers."

"Awww, dammit…" Hashirama murmured as he went to complete his impromptu task.

Obito had his hands full with Kaguya and her brat of a PA. He already felt a headache coming on, and it didn't help that Hashirama and Madara had all but disappeared. "If they took off I'm going to kill them both." He muttered to himself while he listened to Zetsu outlining all the shortcomings of his store.

Zetsu pointed to some inventory forms and looked to his mother. "Mother, they don't even have the inventory forms sent to corporate yet! A clear issue of incompetency."

Obito didn't think he could possibly roll his eyes any harder, then he noticed Madara and Hashirama sneaking quietly past the office door with Madara holding a finger to his lips and pointing at Kaguya's back. What are those two up to? Acknowledging them with his eyes, but keeping his expression as unchanging as possible, he turned his attention back to Kaguya, who was busy praising her son's skills of deduction.

"My son makes a good point, Obito. What of your department heads, particular…this one…?" She held out an ordering history file and pointed at the name "Kiba" on the top. "I'd like to speak to him, if you don't mind." Her voice was strangely echoey, for being so close. Obito grabbed the form and walked to the intercom by Madara's desk. "Why are you taking such an invested interest in our store's daily functions? I can't think of another COO who goes out of their way for that." He murmured, rather more to himself, than really asking her a question. Kaguya, however, didn't answer, she just smiled darkly at him as Obito called for Kiba to come to the office.

As they waited, Madara and Hashirama had returned and slipped into the office, both seemed slightly out of breath, and trying to hide it. Zetsu eyed them suspiciously. "What were you two doing? Racing up the stairs?" He sneered.

Madara was about to say "no" but Hashirama elbowed him in the ribs. "Uh, yes, racing, that is indeed what we did do." He sounded a little robotic in his reply. Zetsu rolled his eyes at them.

"Such children. Mother, I'm tired, I'm going to the car." Kaguya nodded at him and he slunk out of the office, flipping Madara off as he went. Madara smiled and waved back, which caused Zetsu some slight confusion. He passed Tobirama in the hall, and the white haired manager gave him a wide birth, sidestepping him. When he entered the office, he sat in one of the chairs available in front of Madara's desk.

"So, Kaguya, you've spent a total of…three hours here, and that's not including what time you spent at my store, and yet you have yet to tell any of us why."

The silver-haired COO pushed her locks behind her ears and smiled. "I think you all forget your places, I don't have to tell you what I'm doing here. You'll find out at the next board meeting about this district, I trust you will all be there? You'll find out then." She gathered her coat that she had slung on Madara's chair (he didn't like that one bit) and grabbed her expensive, shiny purse that she had resting on his desk. Hashirama raised his hand to say something but he was interrupted by a very distraught and out-of-breath Zetsu dashing into the office screaming, "MOTHER! SOMEONE VANDALIZED MY CAR!"

"What?" Kaguya was aghast. "What happened?"

Zetsu's whinging was causing Madara to tilt his head and cringe. "Mother, someone ripped the valve stems out of the tires, and they scratched an…inappropriate image…into the side of the CAR!"

Hashirama held a hand over his mouth, attempting to look shocked but he was, in reality, trying to stifle a laugh. Madara kicked his leg slightly, murmuring out the corner of his mouth, "Be cool, man, be cool."

Zetsu looked as if he was about to burst into tears, and Kaguya grabbed his hand in hers, trying to get her cell phone out at the same time. She glanced over at Tobirama, "Our stores have cameras in the parking lots, yes?" She inquired. But Tobirama shook his head, clasping his hands behind his head and leaning back.

"Nope, I believe YOU said they weren't "necessary" a few years ago…so you're out of luck there."

Zetsu whined at his mom, "Mother, I SAID you needed to get the cameras installed INSIDE my car. You never had it done! Now look, my car is ruined!"

Obito leaned over and cupped a hand around Tobirama's ear, whispering, "With that whine, he would be great to use in hostage situations." Tobirama failed to stifle his snickering, and Zetsu rounded on him.

"You think this is FUNNY?!" He yelled. "I"m filing a police report RIGHT NOW! COME ON MOTHER!" he stormed out of the office, leaving Kaguya to trail him, while on the phone with the police department.

Madara quietly waited by the door and watched them descend the stairs. Once out of earshot, he shut the heavy oak door and looked at Hashirama. His at-first reluctant partner in crime met his gaze, and they both started shaking. Madara was the first to break, nearly doubled over laughing as hard as his stomach would let him. Hashirama had to grab the corner of the bookcase to his left to avoid losing his balance. His signature bellowing laughter on full blast. Tobirama and Obito looked on in confusion. "What they hell did you guys do?" Asked Tobirama, always unhappy to be left out of the joke.

Madara tried to speak, but then was overcome again, holding his stomach and falling into his office chair. Obito sighed and nudged Tobirama with his elbow.

"This could take a few minutes, let's get coffee in the break room…I think I know what happened…" The two got up and walked past the store manager and DM, who honestly had no idea they had walked out.

A/N I fucking hate Zetsu…and this is the only opportunity I'll ever have to really show how much I hate that little black glob of a mama's boy. I'm glad to finally write a fun chapter. Hopefully more of these soon :)

Cheers!