"But in all seriousness, don't be racist. A wise man once said: Do not judge a man by the color of his skin, judge them by the content of their gains -Martin Lifter King." Dio mentioned. Giorno facepalmed.

"Now, Giorno. You may be surprised that there are other types of fitness aside from bodybuilding and calisthenics." Dio said and showed him a list.

...

"What's this..?" Jolyne squinted, noticed a rather peculiar message on her boyfriend's inbox. It's been awhile since she opened his social media account, her trust for him was absolute. But now...

A laptop smashed the goddamn wall as she broke down crying.

...

"Bodybuilding. It is what we're doing. Sculpting our body to make us even more perfect. Then we have powerlifting. Which where you give 0 fucks about aesthetics in pursuit of power. You are very strong but you look like a really tough marshmallow. Next is crossfit. It may sound like a hip and cool name but the only cross you'll be getting is the one on top of your grave and the only place you'll fit in is inside a fucking coffin." Dio explained. "What, why is crossfit so bad? What gives?" Giorno asked. "Crossfit teaches advanced lifting techniques to non advanced people. If you want to see some barbell porn, go watch someone do crossfit. There is a 80% chance money back guarantee that you will see a person get pounded by a metal dick." the older blonde said as a matter of fact.

"Sounds like you are biased against it." his son mumbled. "I am not." Dio countered. "Well, give me one good reason why I should avoid it then." Giorno folded his arms.

"Okay. It's a class, should I say more?"

Giorno became silent, it sounds like it does suck.

"I already enrolled you to a school so you can be in a hell called a classroom. Why take it a step further and submerged to Satan's lake of fire and take up crossfit?" Dio asked.

Giorno went in to a deep thought. But the older blonde wasn't satisfied "Alright. Let's compare fitness to halloween. SWOLE- oween perhaps. Not to be confused with SWALLOWeen, it's when I give hoes king sized candy, along with your mom."

"Pa, stop mocking madre, she is already dead!" Giorno snapped. She was neglectful of Giorno but he respects her nonetheless. "Don't worry, son. She lives in my memories. Specially when I wank. I still think of her sometimes when I do." Dio said with a tear in his eyes.

"Ughh..." Giorno groaned. "You know, out of every girl I met. She gave me the best head-"

"Halloween candy and fitness, please." Giorno said before they go off topic.

"Oh right, I got a bit off track there. Okay, let's begin."

BODYBUILDING.

"It is the bowl of candy outside your door with a paper that says 'take one'. What do you do when you see a bowl of candy that says take one? You take ALL OF IT. Or atleast take more than anyone else. It is the essence of bodybuilding. You take more gains than anyone else. It is not only on bodybuilding, but in America as well. It's called capitalism. CAPITALIZE on your gains so it is the first thing a person sees when they see you. Like, if I handed you a sheet of paper with capitalize words and small once, the first ones you see are the ones in CAPSLOCK."

POWERLIFTING.

"This is king size candybars. You may have think, you hit the jackpot. Since in powerlifting, it is all power. You lift heavy and show THE WORLD how fucking strong you are. But don't get fooled." Dio wagged his fingers.

"Hmm?" his son raised an eyebrow.

"If you have to choose between fun sized candy bars against king sized ones, I suggest choosing the smaller ones. They are called fun sized because you can have fun with it all day. You can keep it in your pocket and eat it wherever and whenever. Like walking around shredded like a bodybuilder. Compared to king sized candies, once you open it, you are obliged to finish it. And when it's all gone, so is your fun. As a powerlifter, your fun is also gone was you left the gym because you are just a fat guy that no one knows is strong."

CROSSFIT.

"It's a candy, with a razor blade in it. You think what you got is sweet, but all you just did is subtract years from your lifespan. People who put razor blades in candies are like people who try to get you to crossfit. They hate their lives so much, they want others to feel their pain."

CALISTHENICS.

"It's like Whoppers. And as you know, whoppers are poor people candy. The reason you do calisthenics is probably because you are too poor to buy a gym membership. If you hand out whoppers, it's most likely because they were on sale."

DVD WORKOUTS.

"Doing dvd workouts are like handing out fucking pretzels. What kind of a moron hands out pretzels on halloween? These people are dead inside. And not like they dress as zombies for halloween, I mean they are literally dead inside, 24/7/365. They think they are too good for a gym, but in reality, they are androids being controlled by that white girl in spandex in the screen. These people are like pretzels too, outside they are salty, and they are crumbling inside."

Giorno's phone vibrated. "SILENCE!" Dio screamed at the device. "... It is. That's why it didn't rang." Giorno mumbled as he reached for it.

Dio grumbles something about the rain and how he wants to get back to the gym already.

Giorno's eyes widened. It was Jolyne, she texted her the first time in 6 months.

"Please can I call?"

Giorno immediately ran to his room. "Hey hey hey! You better not wank!" Dio yelled out from the living room.

...

"Kars! It's so good to see you." Jonathan smiled. "Likewise, Mr. Joestar." the other man replied quite monotonously. "Are you going to compete on the Ultimate Buff-form in the next two months?" Jonathan asked. "Not. However, I am interested in the IRON MAN tournament." Kars said.

"... Pardon, but what's it about?" Jonathan asked. "Well, you and ACDC aren't allowed to compete since you own gyms, but to put it frankly, it's a tournament where representatives of each gym showcase strength in the flashiest of ways." Kars shrugged.

"Ooh, elaborate!" Jonathan asked with beaming curiosity. "A judge will pick out a paper, whether it would be a feat of strength (e.g. number of pushups, amount of weight bench pressed, arm wrestling, etc) or a straight up martial arts bout. And not to mention, each gyms have a senior and junior representative throughout the tournament as well. I'll be representing ACDC's 24/7 fitness' senior while my protege, Wamuu Williams, will represent in the junior category." the shorter man said.

Jonathan asked him who Wamuu is, only to be shocked when Kars showed him a picture of a 6'8 muscleman. "H-He is representing as a junior? How old is he?!" the Joestar asked.

"Oh, he is 16 years old."

...

Mista layed down on his own bed, his internet was too shitty to allow him to play Gangster's Paradise so he was left in his own thoughts. A part of him was a bit envious of Giorno's progress for some reason. 'Damnit, why?! I'm his bestfriend, why am I jealous?! I don't even like Trish...' he sat up. No, it wasn't Trish. It was... Giorno's path to being a real man.

He felt inadequate. He felt like as a boy, he was being left behind by his pal. Mista stared at his own biceps "Maybe it's time for me to train too."

...

"Shh, shh, it's okay, I'll... I'll see you when this storm ends, okay?" Giorno softly said. Jolyne could only let out a whimper before hanging up.

...

Jonathan left the conference, a bit numb to be honest. "Do I really want to enter?" he entered his car, it wasn't flooding to the part of town he is in so he is pretty much safe. "Pfft, of course I wanna." he chuckled to himself. And he knew just the people who can represent for him.

...

"HELL YES." Dio cheered as he watched the news. The hurricane was getting weaker, they'll be able to lift in no time. "Get the fuck outta my state, fucking storm!" he cussed at the TV.

Giorno heard it from his room. "Well, that was good news."

In the Iron Man tournament, there was a young man they called "Gold"

Lmao I recommend reading Kengan Asura.