Author's Note: MR and Ep have had plenty of stories about the effects of tulips on our lady, but what if…. It was Chat who went a little on the loopy side?
Ep: In the annals of stories we've done in this vein, Lyra wins top marks. But now I understand why she wanted Ic and I to beta test her concept for her. Thank God Ic doesn't remember my having to call the fire department to get him down from the chandelier.
MR: *sigh* I'm pretty sure she said beta READ not beta test…
Lyra: I'm not complaining, MR. These pictures for blackmail purposes are awesome.
Reveal: Adrien, Nino
There were things dudes did for their bros without question, but Nino thought maybe this was crossing that line. Adrien, typically the paragon of behaviour excellence, was not only sprawled across the couch in Nino's living room but also rubbing his head on Nino's shoulder much like a cat.
Which kind of made sense, given that Chat Noir had been sitting there only moments before, caterwauling a song of love to one Miss Ladybug. It was still hard to mesh the idea of Adrien and Chat Noir as the same despite the rather intimate proof otherwise. Admittedly, Nino was fairly impressed with the fact that Adrien seemed able to purr even without the suit. He just wasn't overly keen on the whole face rubbing on shoulder thing.
Nino sighed, pushing Adrien from his overly invading displays of affection with an exasperated "Dude," which had little to no effect at all. Man, he hoped the heroine would be back soon.
When Ladybug had stumbled onto the balcony of his house, there had been a moment of anticipation as he hoped she was going to ask him to suit up. Instead, she had shoved Chat Noir at him, somehow managing to untangle herself from her partner's limbs and frantic cheek rubs with a simple explanation of "Catnip. Keep him safe here with you. Be right back." and then swung away.
Babysitting a cat boy high in some kind of aphrodisiac had definitely not been on his evening's to-do list. But here he was, Chat transformed to Adrien, far too snuggly for Nino's comfort.
Adrien's kwami seemed to find the whole thing particularly hilarious, even after Nino had found cheese in Adrien's shirt to feed him. Adrien's kwami was a dick, Nino decided, shoving the cheese at the laughing cat.
Nadja Chamack's commentary on the akuma that had left Chat incapacitated followed the red-spotted superheroine as she dodged and ducked around the garden tools that were being launched her way. Paris, it seemed, was covered in vegetation - plants and flowers and who knew what else springing up on every building and street. The Eiffel Tower looked like is was a parade float with the colourful roses that lined its steel beams.
"I need Ladybug," moaned Adrien, pressing his cheek against Nino's shoulder. The first set of coherent words his friend had spoken in nearly 20 minutes. Progress, Nino supposed, patting Adrien's head in what he assumed was comforting to a cat.
"It's cool, Dude. Look she's on TV."
Adrien's attention immediately snapped to the TV, pupils blown wider than Nino thought humanly possible. When Ladybug appeared on the screen again, the rumbling purr started restarted, but so much louder, followed by a keening sound that Nino could only label as animalistic.
"She needs me." Adrien jumped from the couch and was racing to the door before Nino could even react.
"Woah, Dude! Wait!"
Not that it mattered anyway. Adrien's kwami sat with a smug smirk on the coffee table, seemingly undisturbed that his chosen had just thrown himself down an apartment hall screaming that Ladybug needed him.
"He'll be back," Plagg drawled. "Have any more cheese?" Grabbing the cat and shoving him into his shirt, Nino wondered how Adrien hadn't strangled his kwami yet.
Running down the hallway to chase after his delusional best friend proved harder than he thought. Adrien had been Chat Noir for a long time, giving him amazing speed and dexterity as he barrelled up the stairwell at the end of the hall. Nino cussed under his breath, trying to catch up before anything dangerous happened - hearing the door that opened to the roof slam as Adrien flung it open.
Panic set in, a mental image of Adrien plummeting to his death off the side of Nino's apartment pushing him to take the last of the stairs three at a time.
"Adrien! Wait!" When his shouts went unheard, Nino tried a new tactic. "Come on, Plagg - he's gonna jump off the freaking roof!" His feet still running towards where Adrien had been, Nino poked at Plagg in his shirt. Plagg just snorted.
"Doubtful."
Nino wasn't prepared when his body slammed hard into Adrien's suddenly still one. The resulting tumble was harsh, painful even, as they fell on the rough surface of the rooftop. Landing awkwardly side by side, Nino lay gasping for air, trying to figure out what exactly had just happened.
Adrien spoke first.
"Where are we?" He sounded confused. Understandably so, thought Nino, pushing himself to sit. The dude probably last remembered being a superhero fighting an akuma and now he was sitting on a rooftop without his supersuit beside his friend. Nino guessed the catnip had worn off, leaving Adrien lost.
"My house?" It shouldn't have sounded like a question, but it was. Adrien frowned, looking down on his hands as if he was trying to piece together an unsolvable riddle.
"This is going to sound strange, but…" a pause "how did I get here?"
Nino swallowed hard.
"Uh, Ladybug dropped you off."
Adrien went pale, his eyes wide as he stared at his best friend.
"Ladybug?"
Deciding truth was better than a convoluted mess, Nino explained the whole scenario - leaving out the details about overly affectionate shoulder rubs with a cheek - and how he'd changed back into Adrien while in the safety of Nino's house. Adrien stayed an uncomfortable shade of white while he listened.
"Does Ladybug know?" he finally whispered.
"No, Dude, no. I promise. She went back out there to fight the akuma as soon as she left you with me. She doesn't know." Adrien let out a long breath before looking over the edge of the building at the greenery still growing at a crazy rate.
"Plagg?" Nino wasn't sure how the little creature hadn't been flattened in their fall, but Plagg appeared, aloof and uninjured, floating to Adrien's side as if he deserved to be there. "What happens if I get too close to catnip again?"
"Who knows?" shrugged the kwami. "You could be fine for a bit or you could get all lovey-dovey again. You aren't really a cat, you know, so it's hard to be sure." Adrien groaned, unsure of what to do.
Nino sighed.
"Fine. Take me with you. I'll try to help you out, Dude. Bros before Garden Hoes."
Adrien visibly relaxed, holding out a fist for their usual bro-style fist bump. It was still surreal to see Adrien transform into Chat Noir - the bright green flash of light changing goodie-two-shoes Agreste into a cocky, bad-boy style cat. Nino shook his head in disbelief.
"You can't tell anyone. Especially Alya. Do you understand?"
"Dude, no way. I value life way more than that. Your life especially. Alya might kill you." Chat Noir chuckled, turning his back and gesturing for Nino to hop on. Figuring all sense of bro rules had flown out the window with this whole experience, Nino just did what he was told, hoping that maybe some of it would be erased from his memory one day.
Ladybug was tired, even Nino could see her drooping between yo-yo throws. Chat growled - a real effing growl - when he saw his partner fumble a throw and nearly get impaled by a flying spade shovel.
Nino found himself dumped unceremoniously on the grass without a word as Chat vaulted himself away to her side. The battle between the disgruntled gardener and the superheroes seemed to take longer than Nino expected. Garden tools and plant life everywhere. In truth, Nino wasn't sure what catnip even looked like. Chat seemed ok, mostly. Other than the occasional stumble and distracted look on his face.
A lucky charm and a cataclysm managed to somehow free the black butterfly so Ladybug could purify it and set everything back to normal.
Nino watched as Chat Noir inched closer and closer to Ladybug, unable to tell if the cat's behaviour was normal or not. Ladybug's exasperated expression was visible from across the park.
"Down kitty, or I'll give you back to Nino."
That was his cue, Nino figured, running across the square just in time to stop Chat from rubbing his face all over Ladybug's head. The whimper that Chat gave when pulled away from his lady was pathetic.
"My laaaadddyyyy," he cried. Her earrings beeped and she frowned, obviously hesitant to leave.
"I've got this, LadyDude. Don't worry."
The smile on Ladybug's face was pure relief.
"Thank you, Nino."
Somehow, Nino managed to drag Chat Noir into an alley and order him to transform. Ignoring Plagg's whines for cheese, Nino wrapped an arm around his friend to hold him upright, praying that no paparazzi would see the cheek rubs on his shoulder. The media would have a field day with that.
Accepting his fate as guardian of the drugged up boy behind the black cat, Nino braced himself. Back to couch cuddles. The things bros do for each other.