Operation: Flanks for nothing.
Disclaimer: Skymaster23 has no connection to Hasbro, Star Trek, or Care-Bears.
Note: parts of this will be AU.
Following the "cobrathon" incident, Duke is in the rec-room watching tv when he hears Scarlett behind him. "Is that supposed to be one of our jets?" She asks Footloose and Quick-Kick, both holding toy vehicles.
"Heh, she thinks it's a Conquest, too." The latter replies.
"These are Air Raiders, dudette. This here's called a Hawkwind...that's the bad guy plane, and i was totally about to knock out Quick's stupid goody two-shoes Twin Lightning." Footloose added before Quick-Kick blows a raspberry at him.
"Fighting for air against the Tyrants of wind! Just surplus from last year's Christmas drive." The latter then says as he holds it up, only for one of the little rockets to go off and land in her hair. "Sorry."
"No big deal." She tells him as she hands it back, and heads over to the tube. "And how about you Duke?"
"Just watching that new Star Trek show." He says as she sits down next to him.
"I heard from Deep-Six about something in Nevada while i was on leave." She says, and he mutes the show to tell her how aside from the typical bruises, Lifeline and Sci-Fi were mostly unharmed.
"He-the first one-almost got a load of venom if Low-Light hadn't used the fire extinguisher move Flint heard about, atleast i didn't have to make the bad news for Crash-Cart any worse." He explains inbetween Quick-Kick's interruption, only to notice an odd move from Scarlett. Her shrugging it off. "You still don't think much of her?"
"Damn right i don't; all she did was hit us harder than Cobra did with that solar farm." She replies while rolling her eyes. "It took days for me to stop flinching whenever i heard a chopper flying."
Duke shakes his head before continuing. "Also, Beachhead, Mainframe and i nearly got blown up, and Flint pulled an arm muscle while hanging off a hotel sign." He explained. "Other than that, Interpol said one of their agents requested a transfer to us, according to them, it's the same one your team met during the DNA thefts."
At the same time, Serpentor is busy telling off some of his soldiers after finding out that they waste time by bragging about who got beaten the hardest by the enemy's three female members when Dr. Mindbender walks over. "How goes your work, doctor?"
"Much better, my emperor, now that ve are able to make the change external, and the Bio-annihilator test site is 73% finished as vell." He replies, referring to the first surviving blue-shirt, who had been dubbed "Tiny" by one of the Dreadnoks. "But i have other news related to your condition."
"You have found a way to make it stop?" Serpentor asks him.
"Eh, not yet-but there is an individual who claims to have completed a machine that can transfer one person's facial features to another. In other words, Cobra may soon haf the perfect tool for espionage." Dr. Mindbender explains while Serpentor steps towards him.
"Show me."
One week after the demo video reaches the Terrordrome, Low-Light is at the supply room for a new goggle strap when a voice is heard over the intercom. "Dial-Tone to Low-Light, you have a personal call waiting on hold."
Once he reaches the monitor room, he picks up the phone. "Hello?"
"How's it going, GI Bro? The apartment's water pipes just ruptured so we need to move all our stuff, but the pro's would cost too much, so I'd rather have family do it to save some cash and-" Una tells him on the speaker after Dial-Tone switches it over.
"Slow down, slow down. How's my daughter taking this...oh, you're not moving that far? Even so, i just got done with a job in Vegas; can it wait?" He asks while sneering at him and Ace and his poker-buddies for snickering at him, only to suddenly do so as well. "Nah, nevermind. Dial-Tone and i will be right there." He says next while watching the radio-man's eyes widen.
Before Una and Satin are taken to the cell, the latter is placed in a smaller room with one other waiting at a table. Someone she knows only too well. "Now isn't thiss a pleasant surprise, Miss Sssatin?" Cobra Commander asks as he leans back.
"As if, you faceless freak. Last time we met, you were making out with a keyboard." She replies as she turns her head, but raises a brow when he laughs it off.
"Faccceless, you say? That is amusingly ironic."
"What the hell's so funny?"
"Oh, you will find out sssoon enough."
As they are off to "borrow" an A.W.E. Striker, Dr. Mindbender and a few underlings are examining Madame Veil's invention. "And finally, behind this panel are the main circuit boards where the donor face's code will be sent for editing. Here's one of the back-up units." She explains while handing it to him.
"It must have been difficult for even you to acquire these, Madame." He replies as he flips it over.
"Oh, you don't know the half of it-hold on one second." She tells him when an employee of hers walks in to tell her something. "Do excuse me. I need to go sign some more letters that just arrived."
Once she leaves, Dr. Mindbender tosses it back in the box. "Verdammte Zeitverschwendung." He says under his breath.
"Did you break part of it, sir?" Viper Stratton asks.
"No i didn't break part of it, you fool! Now get out, all of you...not that it vould matter if i did break part of it. The Commander vas right about this person; her machine is-is a piece of crap! Nothing but the guts of every household appliance known to man!" Dr. Mindbender says to himself.
Unaware of this, and between it and the fear of being picked for the arctic experiments he heard about, Viper Stratton begins reconsidering his future.
Not long after, the Dr. contacts the Terrordrome. "I trust you have finished studying the facial transference machine by now, Dr. Mindbender. Has madame Veil agreed to sell the schematics?" Serpentor asks him.
"Um, yes; about that...unfortunately, my emperor, it vould appear that she is less...stable than vhat i expected."
"What?! You had better mean her sense of balance, you blithering mumpsimus*. The Crimson Twins have just finished informing all their agents. There will not be any more setbacks, this i command!"
"Ye-yes, of course, oh great one. Even if the machine itself is a failure, ve can simply kill her, then take the components, the island, and her fortune all at one." Dr. Mindbender tells him.
"Hmm, that is acceptable. We will never speak of this again when it's over. But if you botch it up, your suffering will be the stuff of nightmares!"
While Low-Light is leaving his office, Flint sighs and reaches for his phone to get the only Joes who could be of aid. "Hello?" He hears from Cpl. West.
"Cpl; are either of your superiors there?"
"Yes sir, here you go...It's Flint for you."/"Evening, Flint, what's going on?" She and Lady-Jaye say to him, and the latter is given the details, causing both to think back to that night during the fast food rocket ordeal. "Glamour Girls?, Yeah, we noticed the connection years ago...Turns out Extensive bought it in '73...so we fed them to Timber and the rest of the guard dogs before the Albania mission."
"...How soon can you and Scarlett be ready?"
"I'm afraid you just missed Scarlett, she left five minutes ago with Dusty, Rock 'n Roll, and a few Greenshirts to determine if Cobra was involved with that plane crash in Pakistan the other day. But I'll be packed faster than a hummingbird."
"You and me both; is Cover-Girl here?"
"She just got back with some new garbage bags, I'll let her know." Lady-Jaye tells him before hanging up.
"Know about what?" Cover-Girl asks, and gives some more details for the case. "Glamour Girls...that sure brings me back. How soon can i make them regret it?"
"By reminding me know who the middle-man is."
"The middle-woman went by the name Madame Veil, only one of the biggest names in the modelling world; started as just another WW2 pin-up girl before founding that company in the early 60s until, well, you know..."
Following Flint's capture, the Moray skipper turns the radio on. "Moray 720 to Dr. Mindbender, we're returning ahead of schedule two or three subjects."
"Vat does that "or" mean, and are those explosions i am hearing?" He asks in reply.
"The Joes must have been tracking the first two, but it looks like they just got snuffed out. Which leaves us with one problem." The Skipper tells him.
"The Baroness did think they vere suspicious...Vat else?"
"Er...no idea how, but Zarana showed up a few seconds before the shooting started, and she's acting just like the rest. Any suggestions, Dr.?"
Dr. Mindbender slaps a hand to his forehead at this, instantly knowing that those muck-slurping chimps must have used the camera on her, meaning the only way to rid himself of these migraines was to give it to their handler.
Once the three are being led off the dock, one of the Vipers walks toward them. "I'll take it from...Is she here for back-up?" He asks while motioning to Zarana.
"Nope, she got brain-drained by accident, so you take her to the Doc; we'll put these two to the cell." The Skipper tells him. The Viper nods and walks with them to a security blindspot, where he pushes one into a wall. "Whatl?! Double crossin' bas-" The other says before the Viper strangles him and kicks the other in the head, and shoves both into a closet. He then places something into Cover-Girl's pocket.
When the trio wakes up, she speaks first. "Where'd everybody go...and why didn't you go with them?"
"I could say the same, blondie, blabbering like ya know me; those arsewipes are so dead when Mindbender lets me out of here!" She says as she rolls her eyes.
"Matter of fact, we do, pepto-bitchmal." Cover-Girl tells her.
"Joey spies, are ya? Figures; and let's see ya call me that again after i bash your bloomin' teeth in!" Zarana shouts.
Lady-Jaye is about to say something when Satin and Una intervene. "Yeah yeah; settle down, you two. Besides, it's awfully hard to bash anyone's teeth when you're stuck like that." The former singer says, motioning behind her.
Zarana looks to her right and gasps when she notices that she's been shackled to the wall. "Aw, f-"
While she deals with that, the two find a place to sit. "Tell the rest to not face each other while talking, Helen." Lady-Jaye tells Satin.
"Wish we could have met in a better looking place. Will we'll be busting out soon?" She asks her. "Is my daughter okay? And how's the sailorman doing; they're all on the way, i hope?" Satin asked next.
"Shipwreck's still around, and your kid's safe with Short-Fuze, by the way. No way i was gonna miss paying either of you back."/"Flint and Lift-Ticket are probably on the way now, but Shipwreck's out on patrol near Iceland." The two explain. "Did they say how much they want for ransom? I can't imagine they're keeping us for our looks, considering one of us looks like a Care Bear barfed on her." Cover-Girl added while pointing a thumb at Zarana.
"I'm afraid it is about looks. That man who keeps going around shirtless, and the creepy hag have this machine that can steal a person's face!" Una tells them.
The two glance at each other, and gulp. "Anyone here you know, peach?" Lady-Jaye asks to change the subject.
"Just from some ads every now and again."
"I think i know you, though." One of the hostages says. "Courtney Kreiger, right?, I'm Candy Huntley-i remember your photo's from the studio. That's one of the jacket's that came out last month, isn't it?"
"You can talk shop later, missy. We need to find a way out." Lady-Jaye tells her. "And don't face us, we can't have the guards see us talking."
"Right, sorry."
"If this was Cobra made, it'd be easier. You being the expert 'n all." Cover-Girl adds.
"You can't just beat him up like you do on the news?" One hostage asks them.
"Uh, no. He has an FFV 890 with six extra clips. All we got are the bobbypin i never leave home without, a thimble's worth of concrete chips, and that's it." Lady-Jaye replies.
Una looks down in despair, but spots something. "What's that sticking out of your pocket?"
Cover-Girl looks down and pulls it out. "I dunno? Definitely didn't leave the base with it, and it looks like a bunch of wires." She continues, causing all of them to slowly look to the box by the exit.
"Didn't you do a scene like this, Dawset?" Another hostage asked.
"Not with actual electricity, but it's our only option. What do we do about the guard?"
"Let's just wait till his shift is over. We'll nail both of them once they aren't looking."
Once the sequence is averted, Madame Veil stands and heads for the mirror. "You're too late, Mr. soldier. Her face is all mine, now." She tells the crowd, and starts twirling around. "La la la la la; young, young, young a~gain!" She sings to herself as all of them glance at each other in confusion.
"See what Rich can do for her." Low-Light says to Lifeline.
When the Joes, hostages, and captured Vipers are back on US soil, an army prison bus arrives with one more familiar face. "Lavigne?" Flint asks aloud.
"Correcto mundo, sir. How many snakes you got for us?" The m.p. asks back while heading to the prisoners, only for one of them to elbow him and get his sidearm.
"Shit, watchout!" Another m.p. says as he's shot in the arm. The prisoner than turns towards Una, but a second Viper jumps infront of her, whose helmet falls off when he hits the ground, showing it to be Stratton.
After Dial-Tone and a third m.p. kill the shooter, Una crouches down next to the unexpected savior. "Wh~why did you~why did you do that...Was he one of you all along?" She asks him as Lifeline shakes his head opens his medkit.
"Let's just s...ay i got a thing for blonds."
A few weeks later, he is seen walking into one of the barracks. "Sure doesn't look like the brochure." He tells himself as he looks around, and head to a bunk.
As he opens his dufflebag, he hears someone approaching. "You are being former snakeman, yes?" He turns to see a bald man with a reddish beard.
Chapter sixteen.
* This is a real word meaning one who keeps making the same mistake even after being corrected.