Never Realised

"The other girl." Dean said, "It's April, isn't it?" Dean realised.

Punk looked across at him, a nervous feeling in his stomach as they stood outside the bar, the streets loud and awake as it was the weekend. He desperately wanted to avoid bringing AJ's name into things. He'd caused her enough pain.

"N-No… what?" Punk shook his head, not having enough time to think of something to say.

"It is. It's her." Dean nodded. He could tell by his brother's face that he was right in thinking it was AJ, "She's upset. You're… You're sitting there kissing your wife right in front of her after you what? Promised to be with her?" Dean questioned, "She's a young girl, man. What are you doing?" Dean shook his head with confusion.

"I didn't want to come here tonight, Janine did." Punk said, "I tried to get out of it but-"

"But what Janine wants, Janine gets, right?" Dean nodded, "I'm familiar."

"I'm not trying to hurt, April." Punk said.

"Yeah maybe you're not trying to, but you are. Clearly. She's just a young girl. She's in college-"

"Yeah and I'm not in a nursing home, Dean." Punk said, "She's been there for me. Through all of this. She would sit and chat to me all night in there. And then… then we got closer." He explained as Dean ran his hands through his hair, "I'm in love with her."

"I felt better when I didn't know." Dean admitted, not being able to keep up, looking across at Punk worriedly, "You took advantage of that poor girl. You knew what you were doing. You knew the consequences." He said, "And now you've broken her heart and tossed her to the side. I mean… was that the attention? Did you just want some fling with a hot young girl before you have to face your wife for the rest of your life?"

"You shut your mouth." Punk said angrily, "This was not a fling." He spat as Dean realised he had touched a nerve clearly, "I love April. It's killing me that she's got caught in this and has to suffer." He said, "But what the hell am I supposed to do?"

"Maybe not parade your pregnant wife right under her nose whilst she's working. Might be a good start." Dean said.

"Janine insisted on coming here." Punk said, "I tried getting out of it. I didn't want to bring her for April to see. I'm not trying to hurt her, Dean. Believe me."

"Yeah, well to me she looks like a girl with a broken heart." Dean said, "Didn't you think about the possibilities of her getting hurt in all of this? Or were you just worrying about shoving your dick in her-"

"Not at the time. I was setting myself up for divorce. When Janine came back I was laying it all out there. I was looking up lawyers, I was about to end my marriage, Dean." Punk made clear, "I didn't intend for there to be a choice where I had to choose. It was always gonna be April."

"Why didn't you tell me it was her?" Dean sighed.

"Because I didn't want her to get caught up in it. And if I was gonna tell Janine about it, I wasn't gonna drop April's name in it." Punk said.

"What age even is she?" Dean questioned.

"She's twenty." Punk said, "She's a grown woman. She can make her own decisions. I didn't pressure her. This was mutual." He made clear.

"Well obviously considering how hurt she looks at seeing your wife kissing you." Dean said, "Man, I like April. She's harmless and she… she doesn't deserve to be brought into this mess." Dean sighed to himself.

"Yeah I feel the same way, don't worry." Punk sighed.

"How'd she even manage to see you? Don't her parents lock her up in her room?" Dean shook his head.

"She was telling them she would stay later at college." Punk said, "We'd go to a hotel or… my car-"

"And now you're just supposed to pretend like it didn't happen?" Dean asked.

"Well I don't know what I'm supposed to do, Dean. My wife is pregnant. There's gonna be a baby and if… if I have to lie to myself and suck this up so that baby doesn't suffer in any of this then I… I gotta do it, right?" Dean asked as his brother sighed to himself.

"But you love April?" Dean asked.

"More than I've ever loved anyone." Punk said, "It wasn't just sex. It wasn't just an affair and a fling… we would talk all the time. I've told her things I've never even thought about telling Janine." He said as Dean sighed to himself.

"A part of him could understand his brother and AJ getting together. They were both very similar people. April was very laid back, easy going and honest. Janine was not those things. Their personalities couldn't have been anymore different.

"All I can do is give you advice." Dean said, "You either follow your heart, you be selfish and you come clean to Janine about everything. You get April back-"

"I don't even know if she'll want to be with me anyway. Not now." Punk sighed to himself.

"Right now you tell me what looks more appealing to you? A life with April or a life with Janine and your kid?" Dean asked as Punk looked across at him. He could tell by his brother's silence what he was thinking.

"Don't make me say it." Punk sighed to himself.

"April?" Dean asked as Punk nodded.

"And what does that say about me? As a dad to be? Am I gonna look at this kid and resent it for making me stay in a marriage I'm not happy in?" Punk questioned.

"No one's making you do anything, Phil." Dean reminded him.

Truth be told, Dean never really believed Punk when he said he was in love with this other girl he had been seeing. He just thought his brother was trying to escape, hence why he suggested to attempt to make it work with Janine, but after seeing April and how hurt she was, and hearing how deeply his brother cared for her… he wasn't sure he could tell his brother to ignore that.

"Either way I'm gonna lose, right?" Punk nodded, "If I tell Janine everything I might not even get to see my kid." He said. His heart blead for his unborn child and the mess which he or she was being brought into. He felt ashamed to imagine himself as any sort of dad, let alone a good one.

"But your happiest when you're with April." Dean said as Punk nodded, "I'm not blind, those three weeks I noticed the change in you. You were happy. Here I was thinking it was just because you were getting laid but… you actually do love her, don't you?" Dean realised.

"Yeah, I do." Punk nodded, "And knowing I've hurt her, and she's breaking her heart in there is breaking mine too." He said as Dean sighed to himself.

"Hey, you two." Janine walked out of the bar as Dean looked over, "What are you doing out here?" She shook her head, "It's freezing."

"Talking about work." Dean covered quickly as Punk nodded along, "I know how you don't like Phil talking about work with you-"

"Oh, I don't mind it." Janine smiled, locking her arm around Punk's, "But feel free to come back and join us when you're both finished. We may or may not need some more drinks." She said, leaning up and kissing Punk's cheek as he smiled to her, watching her walk back into the bar.

"What she's incapable of getting her own drink?" Dean scoffed.

"I can't think straight right now." Punk shook his head.

"Maybe you should go check on April." Dean said.

"Oh yeah I'll just go on upstairs to her apartment and walk in whilst my wife is sitting in the bar downstairs." Punk nodded sarcastically.

"I'm serious, you gotta talk to her. You made her think that this was going somewhere and now she probably feels like an idiot. Not to mention she probably feels extremely used." Dean pointed out.

"Don't you think I know that? I know she probably thinks all of that." Punk insisted.

"Just go check on her. I will distract Janine." Dean said as Punk sighed to himself.

"Ok." Punk nodded, walking back into the bar with Dean.

Dean headed back to the table whilst Punk wandered around the bar to the back without Janine noticing. He walked into the kitchen where he saw the chef busy.

"April around?" Punk asked casually. If anyone asked why he'd come up with something.

"Stock room." John, the chef nodded as Punk left the kitchen, finding his way into the stock room where he saw her sitting on one of the huge boxes that the supplies came in with.

"April." Punk said as AJ looked up, not realising he was standing there.

"Just go away." AJ shook her head. She felt humiliated by him. She wasn't sure it was his intention, she hoped it wasn't, but it still hurt her.

"No, please just… let me talk." Punk said, walking further into the stock room.

"I don't wanna listen to it." AJ shook her head, "It's over. You're back with your wife, you'll have the baby and we'll pretend this didn't happen. Easy, right?" She said sarcastically.

"If I leave her… If I tell her about us, I risk losing my kid. And if I don't, I risk losing you." He said, "I don't know what I'm supposed to do. All I know is that I love you."

"Do you?" AJ wondered, "Or did you just feel sorry for me? Was… Was I an easy target?" She asked him.

"What are you talking about?" Punk shook his head.

"Poor little virgin April who has no one." AJ nodded, "Is that what you thought?"

"No, April come on… you know it wasn't like that." He said, "I was getting ready to divorce my wife. You know I was. Her being pregnant has changed things. But not my feelings for you." He made clear as she looked up at him.

"This is your life." AJ said, walking closer to him, "I'll be hurt for a while, I'll miss you and think of the what if's… but you are the one going home with a woman you don't love anymore to raise a child you didn't want." She made clear as he looked down at her, "The life that you told me you didn't want whilst we were in bed together, naked." She whispered as he looked down at her, "After you'd made love to me over and over again." She said as he gulped, feeling her standing so close.

"Because I want a life with you." Punk said quietly.

"I refuse to be played with like a toy." AJ stepped back from him, "I don't blame you for sticking by your wife. She's having a baby." She nodded, "You'd be heartless to walk away so easily." She understood as he nodded.

"I wish there was a way I could make it right." Punk said.

"There isn't. Not without someone getting hurt." AJ nodded, "And I get that it's me who has to get hurt. I'm not the one having your baby. I'm not married to you-"

"That doesn't make you less important." Punk said.

"It does." AJ nodded, "That, I can all handle as best I can but… don't you dare bring her in here and make me watch you both as if I haven't been the one that's been kissing you these past few weeks. Don't make me feel a bigger fool than I already feel." She made clear.

"I'm not trying to. I couldn't get out of it." Punk said, "I'm sorry. I'm sorry for all of this. I never meant to hurt you. It's you I want to be with." He cupped her cheek as she let herself rest against his hand for a few seconds, remembering how good his touch was. But she realised this wasn't going to work.

"No." AJ shook her head, taking his hand away and stepping back from him, "We should just… stay away from each other." She said, "You go and live your life and I'll live mine."

"April-"

"I have to get back to work, and you need to get out of here before my parents find you." She said, "The last thing we need." She said, walking past him and leaving the stock room as Punk sighed to himself, running his hands over his hair as he left the stock room, going back to Janine at their table whilst AJ got back to work, doing everything she could to avoid him.

A/N: Thanks for the reviews guys! Appreciate the support so much. More to come. This is an angsty one! (As they always are lol)