15: For Just a Second

"Chuuya…" The whisper of his name was so soft that Chuuya would have missed it if he hadn't been tracking Dazai's journey through the house, ever shifting corridors and hallways leading him to the kitchen. Chuuya turned, sandwich in hand, staring at Dazai who stood in the kitchen doorway. Dazai was tall and Chuuya's doorways were low - if Dazai were to jump, he'd probably hit his head on the frame.

Chuuya wasn't sure he'd ever seen Dazai look quite so sheepish before. He wouldn't even meet his eyes, staring off at a point beside Chuuya's hip instead. "Dazai." He kept his voice gentle, smiled even as Dazai didn't look at him. "I'm not angry with you. I promise."

Brown eyes met his own for just a second before Dazai looked away again, shrugging, nervous hands picking at the sleeve of his sweater. "You should be mad though, I was really mean to you. You're doing so much already, I was just… I had a bad dream. About Mori. I was… scared. I was scared."

Chuuya felt himself soften at that, tension falling from his shoulders as he placed his sandwich down on the counter, walking towards Dazai instead. Didn't touch him just yet, but he already felt better for the proximity. "It's been two days. I wasn't mad at you then, I'm not mad at you now. Of course you're scared. You're scared and nobody taught you how to deal with it, it makes sense that you lashed out."

Dazai sighed, a noise of frustration, eyebrows drawing together as he frowned. He'd looked up to watch Chuuya's approach, and Chuuya could see the frustration simmering in his eyes. Dazai was angry at himself. "I just.. wish I was better than that. For you. For me."

Chuuya smiled properly at that, floating just a few feet off the ground so he could press a kiss to Dazai's forehead. "Nobodies perfect, though. Especially not us. It'll take time."

Those words seemed to rile Dazai's fear, his face pulling into a bitter frown. "Time is limited, Chuuya. Mori's going to make a move soon, I can tell."

Chuuya nodded, not one to deny something so obviously true. "Yeah, maybe. We'll be ready when he does. Don't worry about it, pet. We'll be just fine."

Dazai rolled his eyes at the old nickname but he was smiling, so Chuuya's words must have helped to calm his more immediate worries. Dazai stepped forwards and chuuya thought he was about to get a hug, but then Dazai walked right on past him to the kitchen counter. He picked up the sandwich Chuuya had made and taking a bite, chewing for a moment before staring down at the sandwich in clear disgust.

"Ew. What the hell, Chuuya?"

"Stop judging me. Lettuce is great in sandwiches, you just don't have good taste." Chuuya was quick to snatch his sandwich back as Dazai eyed the food waste bin. "Come on, leave my lunch alone. I'll make you something. Without lettuce.. Soup?"

Dazai pulled another face. "Gross. Soup is for old men, like Chuuya." Chuuya rolled his eyes and tried to fight back a smile as Dazai laughed, and just like that it felt like everything was back to normal.

Dazai hummed to himself as he rummaged through a wardrobe full of coats and jackets, appreciating the smell of good food as it drifted to him through the hallways. Chuuya was preparing dinner - something that was apparently called boeuf à la Bourguignonne. Dazai was pretty sure that last part was a made up word, but Chuuya insisted it was real, just French. Dazai didn't know why it had such a weird name. It smelt good, that was what mattered.

Dazai also wasn't sure how smell travelling worked in this house. He had no idea how his current location related to the location of the kitchen, if at all. He would ask about it but the last time he'd asked Chuuya about the houses structure the answer had been confusing enough to give him a headache. He still very much struggled to wrap his head around magic.

Really though, that made the prospect of learning more about it even more exciting.

Dazai span round as Chuuya appeared in the room, appearance revealed as he was reflected in the mirror Dazai had been facing. He flashed Chuuya his brightest sweetest smile, a top hat he'd found in a closet full of hats sat on his head. Dazai wasn't sure if Chuuya owned it for fancy dress up parties or if it was something he wore entirely seriously, and that made it even better.

Chuuya did not seem pleased to see him, snatching the hat off of Dazai's head and turning to put it back in the closet. "Hey, how did you even get in here?"

Dazai raised an eyebrow at that one. "Is Chuuya going crazy? I walked in. You know, like a normal person."

When Chuuya turned back around he was glaring - not in an angry way, but in the mildly-annoyed-but-not-really way he sometimes did. Apparently Chuuya was quite protective over his room full of wardrobes and closets. "This room should be off limits, even to you - no, especially to you!" Chuuya directed his glare at the wall then and Dazai laughed as he felt the air around them grow prickly, the house's way of arguing back.

He turned back to the wardrobe, sliding a nice looking tan coat off its hanger and holding it up. "Chuuuya ~ this is the nicest piece of clothing you own, why don't you ever wear it?"

Chuuya turned to look at him, and Dazai saw the hesitation that flickered across his face. Chuuya's expression froze, his eyes locked onto the coat. Ah, it must be important, then.

"Ignoring your comment about my impeccable fashion sense," Chuuya seemed to recover quickly enough and Dazai huffed, starting to slide the coat on. It was a surprisingly good fit, albeit a little tight around the arms. "That coat was a gift from my elder sister. For my birthday, two days before she was murdered."

Dazai paused at that, staring down at the coat. It was half way over his shoulders. "Oh.. I'm sorry." It was a lame apology, but Dazai wasn't sure what else to say. Chuuya just shrugged, walking over and pulling the coat the rest of the way onto Dazai. Hands landed on his shoulders, turning him to face the mirror. It really was a nice coat.

"No need to be. She's at peace in the Summerlands now. She was killed in 1692, you know that time best as the Dark Ages. Mages of all kind were persecuted back then. A mob killed her. She could have fought them off easily, but she engineered her death so it'd ensure the protection of a whole city of trainee Mages. The City of the Mother was destroyed, but the students all escaped. Except her. She died a noble death. I'm proud of her."

"What was her name?" Dazai's voice was soft, barely above a whisper. Chuuya was speaking so reverently of his sister, and it was clear he treasured the memories of her. Dazai had never before wondered what it would be like to have siblings, but he wondered now.

"Her name was Kouyou." Chuuya's voice was equally soft as he adjusted the collar of the coat. Dazai felt it sit heavily on his shoulders, weighed down by everything it must mean to Chuuya. When he turned his head to meet Chuuya's eyes Chuuya was staring at the coat nostalgically. Dazai imagined it had been years and years since Chuuya had gotten it out - maybe even centuries.

"You can keep it."

"What? Really?" Dazai wasn't sure. The coat was obviously precious to Chuuya, Dazai didn't want to tarnish it.

"Yeah. It suits you. A good replacement for your Mafia coat, huh? Besides, tan isn't really my colour."

"Chuuya doesn't have a colour." Dazai lied, turning back to the mirror to take another look at the coat. It did seem to suit him, but it was such a nice coat that he was pretty sure it'd look good on most people. Mm, maybe not Mori. Hirotsu could definitely rock it, but he already had a fancy black coat of his own. Oh, it'd definitely have suited Oda.

Dazai was hit by a sudden idea, eyes widening in his excitement as he turned to face Chuuya. "Chuuya! The coat could be my charm item!"

Chuuya whacked him upside the head at that, a playful little smack that had Dazai laughing. "No, idiot. The charm item needs to be something you'll never take off. I'm not letting you sleep in a coat."

Dazai sighed dramatically, spinning a slow circle, eyes scanning the contents of what could only be described as Chuuya's fashion room. Except half the clothes were several centuries outdated, and there were far too many cloaks. "But Chuuuya, there's nothing I - oh."

Chuuya followed his gaze, rolling his eyes as he saw what Dazai was looking at. "Really? A choker?"

"That is absolutely not a choker. Chuuya that is a collar, and if you think otherwise you are lying to yourself. It has a buckle."

Chuuya sighed and rubbed a hand over his face, and Dazai could tell by his expression that Chuuya knew this was a fight he couldn't win. "Fine, whatever. You want one? You're sure?"

He wasn't sure at all, but Dazai was starting to think he'd never find the 'right' charm item. He'd never liked accessories. "It's fitting, I am your pet aren't I? Besides, I'm sure your stupid little gremlin of a Deity will be pleased that I want to wear a collar. Forever. Because of you."

As expected Arahabaki's pleased rumble of a growl filled the room and Chuuya glared. Chuuya had never detailed Arahabaki's thought process to him, but Dazai had figured it out anyway. "Okay, I'll let you have a choker on one condition."

"Mm?"

"After dinner we're going out and buying a new one. No more stealing my fucking clothes."

Ah. So Chuuya had noticed the missing shirts, then. Oh well.

In the end they bought a ring. A simple little gold band that sat snugly on Dazai's fourth finger. Chuuya didn't say anything about the implications - Dazai didn't either. Neither of them had to. They both had stupid smiles on both their faces all the way home and long into the night.

Every so often Dazai would glance down at the ring on his finger, and Chuuya would spot the motion out the corner of his eye. Every time Dazai did it, it made Chuuya's heart swell and fizzle with an unnameable emotion. Chuuya couldn't seem to wipe away the stupid goofy smile that was stuck on his face and Dazai would laugh at him, call him ridiculous, but wouldn't move from where he was snuggled against Chuuya's side.

Their competition to find the worst movie continued, a couple of hours of respite after a long day of work. Tonight's film was a trashy horror about teens dying in a variety of gruesome ways. Chuuya wasn't sure what exactly was killing them - he was pretty sure the film had explained it, but he'd been too distracted by Dazai's stupidly pretty face.

"Chuuuya, aren't these the kinds of boring movies you're supposed to have sex to?" Chuuya was surprised at the suddenness of those words, and a few moments of fumbling later Dazai had clambered his way into Chuuya's lap, staring down at him. Chuuya stared right back, a lazy smile tugging at his lips as Dazai kept talking. "Seriously, you're not even paying attention. We might as well do something more interesting."

"Yeah?" Chuuya settled his hands on Dazai's hips, rubbing soft circles there, imagining he was feeling skin and not denim. Chuuya smiled up at Dazai, teasing "Maybe I don't want to. I want to see how, ah, Courtney dies."

"Her name isn't Courtney, Chuuya." Chuuya couldn't help but chuckle at the look on Dazai's face, as if he was actually offended Chuuya hadn't been paying attention. "Courtney's already dead. Daphne is - oh, there she goes."

Chuuya heard wailing from the direction of the television but didn't bother to check what gruesome fate not-Courtney was meeting, his eyes focused instead on Dazai's face. Somehow soft yet angular, cheekbones framed by an adorable mess of hair, skin pale. Dazai's eyes were twinkling in the firelight, a soft flush colouring his cheeks. He looked so much more alive than when he had first tried to kill Chuuya, and Chuuya still marvelled at the change.

"You're beautiful, did you know?" Chuuya reached up, thumb brushing across Dazai's cheek as it heated with a blush, the skin reddening prettily beneath his touch. It was a subtle enough tint that he might have missed it months ago, but Chuuya knew to look for those little hints of colour, now.

"Chuuya." Dazai's voice was just close enough to a whine that it had Chuuya's blood rushing south, and it didn't help when Dazai shifted on his lap, thighs each side of Chuuya's legs. Dazai's meaning was clear, and not feeling at all inclined protest Chuuya tightened his hold on Dazai's hip while his other hand slid round to his back, pulling Dazai forwards until their lips met.

It only took a minute of passionate, wet kissing until Dazai's hips twitched forwards, the motion so small Chuuya questioned whether it was voluntarily. He smiled, pulling back to look at Dazai, eyes drawn to his lips. Swollen and red, covered in a wet, glossy sheen.

Chuuya leant forwards again, one hand reaching up to rest against Dazai's neck. He felt the firmness of Dazai's hands against his chest, layers of clothing still separating them.

"The things I could do to you.." The words were a whisper against wet lips and he felt Dazai shiver against him, pressing their lips together again. Arahabaki's growl of approval was a low rumble inside him, the beast stirring feelings of primal possessiveness that Chuuya had kept carefully below the surface until now. He couldn't suppress them now - with Dazai on top of him like this Chuuya couldn't tell where Arahabaki ended and he begun. Did it really matter? Dazai looked divine and Chuuya wanted nothing more than to take him apart. Chuuya reached a hand between them to rest over Dazai's crotch, squeezing, a smirk painting his face as he felt Dazai's dick twitch against him in response.

"You like that." It was a statement not a question but Dazai nodded anyway, his gaze every bit as hungry as Chuuya's. They hadn't done anything sexual since the first time - one of them was always busy or exhausted. But Chuuya was suddenly very aware of everything he could do to Dazai, everything they could do together, and the possibility of it all was almost overwhelming. He'd lived a long time and he'd learnt a lot about sex, more than many human 'experts' ever could.

"Chuuya." Dazai's voice was practically a gasp from above him and Chuuya's gaze snapped up to Dazai's eyes. The need - no, desperation he saw there dragged him back to the moment and Chuuya smiled, reaching up to run a hand through Dazai's hair, pulling him close so their foreheads bumped against each other.

"Patience, love." Chuuya had never been a very patient child. As the decades had passed he'd learnt that some things were worth waiting for after all. "We have time, all the time we could ever want. There's no need to rush."

The words held a promise - a promise that they would survive this, that Mori wouldn't cut their lives short. Dazai's breaths were deep and shuddering against him but he nodded anyway, eyes meeting Chuuya's. "I know. I know we do."

That was a lie. Dazai didn't know, Chuuya didn't know. There was no way to know for sure. Chuuya supposed it probably affected Dazai more - he was used to a fragile body, the concept of mortality. Death wasn't something Chuuya hadn't had to truly fear in a long time.

He feared it now. Especially when Dazai was so close like this, reminding him of everything he had to lose.

"Kiss me." Dazais voice was shaking and Chuuya obliged the command without question, cupping soft cheeks in his hands and bringing their lips together. Dazai kissed with the desperation of a dying man and it made Chuuya's heart ache. His own lips moved soft and slow in contrast, dragging the kiss out until Dazai was panting against him, hands clawing fists in Chuuya's sweater.

"Chuuya - Chuuya -" Dazai's hips were grinding down against Chuuya's thigh now in halting yet frantic little movements and Chuuya had to sigh at how good it felt. He slipped a hand under Dazai's shirt, resting it at his waist, fingers trailing absently over scars. He heard Dazai's breath hitch at the action but didn't move his hand away.

"We're taking it slow today." Dazai whined his disappointment at Chuuya's decision, hips pressing down in what was a very purposeful protest. Chuuya rolled his eyes. In one fluid movement he teleported them both to the bedroom to a spot just a few feet above the bed, twisting his body as they fell so that he landed on top, pinning Dazai carefully to the mattress. Dazai stared up at him, eyes wide and lips swollen, mouth slack at the surprise of their sudden move.

"Did you know I have an entire room in this house dedicated entirely to toys and kit just for sex?" Chuuya kept his tone conversational but he saw the look on Dazai's face, felt the way his breath stuttered for a moment. "I've never actually used any of mine, but I know how. I've practised."

"Could you practise on me?" Dazai's voice was so breathless that Chuuya almost laughed, leaning down so their noses were touching, feeling little puffs of air against his face as Dazai breathed. Chuuya had picked up many hobbies in his years. For several decades sex had played a large role in his life, until he'd gotten bored of nameless fucks with no emotion, no bond. He'd considered starting a long term relationship, but he'd never found someone worth considering for the role.

Dazai was worth considering. Dazai hadn't even given him the chance to consider, steamrolling into his life as he had.

Chuuya tangled their fingers together as he held Dazai's hands either side of his head, pressing them down into the mattress below. He was sat on Dazai's waist. He had to lean forwards a bit to bring their eyes level, but the position left Dazai with no leverage at all.

"Dazai, you're not practise, you're the main event. So. Today we're taking things slow, and one day when we're ready I will show you that room. Sound fair?"

"That's not fair at all." Chuuya just smiled knowingly. As he'd spoken the words he'd been sure Dazai would be all whines and protests, but he knew this was right. There was no need to rush things, not with Dazai, because Dazai wasn't going to disappear like the one night stands always did. If he was going to leave, he would have left by now. The knowledge was elating. Chuuya weighed himself down with a little extra gravity as Dazai bucked against him, a groan bubbling in his throat. The friction was wonderful.

Chuuya stared down at Dazai, wondering what to do with him now he had him, still and constrained - well, as still as Dazai would ever be. Sometimes Dazai was placid, almost lifelessly calm. Then other times like this he was a turbulent force of chaotic energy and inherent curiosity, tearing through the world with no regard for consequences. Chuuya flashed a wicked smile, saw the apprehension on Dazai's face "I could pin you to this bed just using gravity, you know? You wouldn't be able to lift a finger unless I let you."

It was a test, of sorts. Chuuya watched Dazai's face carefully, wanting to gauge his reaction. Given Dazai's past fits of claustrophobia Chuuya wasn't too sure if Dazai would react positively to that particular suggestion, how he really felt about being pinned down like this. Much to Chuuya's delight he felt Dazai's growing erection jump in response, hips rolling up against his own once again. "Chuuya. Stop teasing. You're so mean." Dazai's voice was steady, but coloured by hints of desperation. Chuuya smiled.

"I could just keep you like this." Chuuya's voice was growing less conversational as his arousal grew, shifting closer to something darker, promising. "Let you rut against me until you cum. I wouldn't even have to do anything, would I?"

"Chuuya. Fuck me." Dazai's whine was answer enough and Chuuya decided to finally take pity on him, offering him a soft smile, leaning down to press a gentle kiss to his forehead. He let go of Dazai's hands and slowly pulled back, letting Dazai sit up.

"Soon. Promise. Say, do you want to fuck me? Have you considered that?"

It was just an absent suggestion but Dazai stilled, eyes a little wide as their gazes met. "Would you let me?"

Chuuya raised an eyebrow before shaking his head, taking one of Dazai's hands in his own again, curling their fingers together. He liked the feeling, the warmth of Dazai's hand in his own, the tangible connection tying them together. "Of course, dumbass. Why? Do you want to?"

Chuuya watched, enthralled as Dazai wet his lips and stared off at the wall, colour heating his cheeks. Dazai was embarrassed. It was precious to watch.

"I, ah.. Not that I wouldn't, but I think Chuuya's better. And you've kind of.. got the right…. vibes."

Chuuya couldn't hold back his laughter at that, a snicker breaking the air between them. Dazai glared at him, snatching his hand away, and Chuuya could only smile an apology. "Sorry, sorry, but the right vibes? Seriously, Dazai? What does that even mean? Are you saying I'm very clearly a top and my dominance is so obvious it shouldn't be questioned? Is that it?"

Dazai was glaring tenfold, now. "You have a lot of confidence for someone so short, Chuuya. It's just because you're old. You radiate the wisdom and experience of an old person. That's it."

"Sure, sure." Dazai was trying to play it off with insults, but Chuuya was definitely taking his previous words as a compliment. A reluctantly given, embarrassed admission that Chuuya was the one in control here.

Well. He certainly wasn't going to argue with that.

"I suppose if you want me to fuck you I better make sure I do a good job then, mm?" Chuuya pulled Dazai into a hug and Dazai sighed but followed, allowing Chuuya to lead him to lie down on the mattress.

Chuuya took a moment to stare at Dazai's pretty face. Dazai didn't seem to know what to do, hands hovering awkwardly in the air between them. Chuuya smiled and took one of Dazai's hands in his own, squeezed, gazing into eyes the colour of warm chocolate. "Hey, Dazai.. Can I touch your hair?"

Dazai's blush at that was bright, instantaneous and creeping all the way round to the back of his neck. "Wha.. Y-Yeah, of course." The confusion on his face was imminent but it seemed he was too surprised to bother with a snappy remark, only staring at Chuuya as if he'd said something shocking.

A smile was Chuuya's only form of explanation as he threaded his fingers through Dazai's hair, twisting soft curls around a fingertip and rubbing firm circles above the back of Dazai's neck, into his scalp. Dazai sighed and Chuuya watched as his shoulders lost a little tension, Dazai relaxing into the touch, even as hints of confusion remained on his face, in the curve of his eyebrows.

"Mm...May I kiss you?"

Dazai's blush had spread all the way up to his ears now, forehead creasing as if he was trying to solve a particularly hard puzzle. "You.. don't have to ask?" The unspoken question was clear in his voice and Chuuya just nodded, smiling still.

"I know." Chuuya leant forwards, placing a gentle kiss to Dazai's forehead. "I want to, though. It's polite to ask, don't you think?" He didn't give Dazai a chance to respond - instead he kissed him properly, their lips soft against each other. Dazai's hungry urgency from earlier had faded, replaced with something calmer, warm and loving. Chuuya stroked his hand slowly through Dazai's hair as they kissed, his other hand reaching up to cup Dazai's cheek. Dazai was soft and pliant, not resisting the little touches. Chuuya found it a welcome reaction, a sign that Dazai was relaxing, forgetting about Mori.

Chuuya doubted Mori ever asked for Dazai's consent, in this. Or maybe he did, maybe he did and found it all the more fun when he ignored the 'no' and took what he wanted anyway, leaving a wrecked shell of a boy behind.

"I love you." The words pulled Chuuya from his momentary distraction of darker thoughts. Unable to keep a smile from his face Chuuya reached down to tangle Dazai's fingers in his own again, astounded once again at how much he could feel. The intensity of love was like nothing else. Chuuya felt the ridge of the ring around Dazai's finger, and for a moment he felt as though his heart might burst.

Yosano greeted them at the door. She stared at Chuuya for several long moments before her eyes slid over to Dazai, her gaze wholly serious. "Are you sure you want to do this?" She asked, and Dazai nodded without hesitation, uncaring that Yosano hadn't even greeted them. This was straight to business.

Yosano turned and started walking through her house, and Chuuya gestured to tell Dazai that he should follow. He did, staring around in wonder at the twinkling fairy lights strung across the ceiling, the stacks of books piled precariously, some reaching from the floor right up to the ceiling. Yosano's home was cluttered but it felt like every item had a place, a purpose, was significant enough that it had earned its spot on the floor or shelf or table. Little trinkets lay everywhere - propped up against books, hanging from walls. A few evcen dangled from the ceiling. Dazai could only assume that they were all functional charms of some kind. He wondered if a couple, perhaps, were purely for decoration.

"Memory repressors are a big deal. The Grand Council tried to label them as dark forbidden magic a few decades ago, but enough victims of trauma rely on them that they couldn't get away with it."

Yosano stopped then, Dazai almost walking right into her back. She turned, meeting his eyes, studying his face as though she was reading something there that Dazai couldn't even begin to fathom. "These charms can really fuck someone up, Dazai. We can't talk about it - you can't even know you have memories that are suppressed, or your mind will start breaking down the charm. If the charm breaks or.. or you lose it, or anything, all the memories will come back in a rush. Is that something you think you can handle? Knowing, after not knowing?"

Dazai did pause then, glancing back at Chuuya, who's expression was troubled but otherwise unhelpful. He did offer a supportive smile, though. Dazai took a silent, steadying breath and turned his gaze back to Yosano, nodding. "I.. I can handle it. It won't be pleasant, I know that. I'll probably get curious at one point and take the ring off without realising what I'm doing. That's fine. I just.. really want the nightmares to stop."

A quick, firm nod from Yosano and she turned again, opening what had at first appeared to be a cupboard door, revealing a downwards staircase formed from stone. Dazai didn't question it, following Yosano downwards. He felt a gentle hand on his back and smiled to himself, safe with the knowledge that Chuuya was right behind him.

His breath hitched as he reached the bottom of the stairs and was met with a flat stone table. It was clear to him immediately that he'd have to lie on it and he desperately tried to ignore the memories of Mori, of a scalpel dragging up his side, of being helpless and paralysed as fingers dug themselves underneath his skin. The discomfort must have shown on his face as Yosano was looking at him with something like sympathy in her eyes, her stony expression gentling.

"It'll be quick." She promised, and Dazai nodded stiffly, walking to the edge of the table. He ran a hesitant hand over the surface. The stone was rough, unfinished and crudely cut. This whole room was the same - carved into stone and furnished only by a single oil lamp in the corner.

Sudden hands gripped at his waist and he was being lifted, sat on the edge of the table. He stared down at Chuuya, wanting to tease him about how he'd definitely used magic for that lift - he was too short, otherwise. The words stuck in his throat like a lump, and when he tried to swallow around it he felt like he was choking.

"I'm right here." Chuuya's words were soft and Dazai could only nod, shuffling to lie down on the table. The stone hurt his head. He stared up at the ceiling, dark and completely unlike the bright surgical lightheads Mori used in his personal operating theatre.

"The item?" Hands unmistakably Chuuya's gently slid the ring off his finger, where it had sat since they'd bought it. He probably handed it over to Yosano - Dazai didn't look. He was focusing on breathing.

"A ring? How dull. I expected something flashier from you, Chuuya."

Dazai's lips twitched into a smile as he heard Chuuya's indignant huff from somewhere off to his right. "At least it isn't a collar. He almost convinced me to get him a collar with my initials embroidered on it, from the pet store. The clerk would have been scandalised."

Yosano laughed at that, and suddenly she appeared in Dazai's field of vision, peering down at him. Dazai realised she was floating, a soft purple light glowing all around her. He stared at it in wonder. His best guess was that she was gathering energy around her for the spell. He'd have to ask Chuuya, later.

No. He wouldn't remember any of this, would he? He wouldn't know to ask.

"You don't pay me enough to enchant kinky shit." Her voice was monotone but her focus was on Dazai, expression not exactly a smile, but comforting nonetheless. It was in her eyes, the softness there despite her cool exterior.

"I.. don't pay you at all?"

"Exactly." Yosano drifted back out of sight and a moment later Dazai heard the dull sounds of her shoes touching back down on the ground. He felt a little less anxious, now - Yosano and Chuuya were so close, and both of them had a fondness for him. He could trust them, in this. Trust them to get it right, to let him heal, even if just a little bit.

Dazai let out a sigh then, his shoulders loosening. He was finally going to be free of those nightmares. It was a nice thought, a thought he'd never imagine he'd get to entertain. It had been impossible, before now. Before he'd met Chuuya.

"Go to sleep." The words were sudden, and with them came an exhaustion the likes of which he'd never felt before. It was so intense that Dazai didn't even have a chance to fight it, the world tumbling away from him in seconds. The last thing he felt was a hand over his own, squeezing gently. Even that could have been just a dream.

"Chuuya..?"

Chuuya's head snapped up as he heard his name, a soft whisper from the bed. He smiled at Dazai, leaning over to run a hand through his hair, heart warming as he received a half awake smile in response.

"Hey sleepy. How are you feeling?"

Dazai's eyebrows scrunched at that as he tried to think, his nose wrinkling in concentration. Chuuya was sat on the edge of the bed, had been since he'd brought Dazai home. It had been four hours since then.

"Mm.. tired. Everything's heavy. And fuzzy. Am I sick?"

Chuuya nodded, taking one of Dazai's hands in his own and holding it, just letting himself appreciate the warmth. "Yeah love, you're sick. It's nothing major. You'll be back to normal in a couple of days, you just need to rest a bit, okay?"

Dazai frowned at that but nodded, before yawning widely, reaching up with his free hand to rub at his eyes. Then he stared down at where Chuuya's hand held his own, and Chuuya could see the confusion on his face as Dazai noticed the ring as though seeing it for the first time. The charm was working, then.

"Chuuya, did we get married when I wasn't looking?"

Chuuya laughed at that, because Dazai was spouting his usual adorable nonsense, and the familiarity of it made Chuuya feel better. Even though it had been Dazai's decision to get the charm, it still felt so wrong lying to him like this. "Hah - sure we did. It's a protection charm, okay? As long as you wear it, you'll be safe. So best to keep it on, yeah?"

Dazai was staring down at the ring with a goofy smile on his face. That was good. Chuuya felt bad about the lie, but Dazai was smart. If he just had a random ring on his finger that he had no recollection of, he was likely to take it off, one day. That'd be.. unpleasant, for everyone involved.

"Hey, I've got to pop out for a bit. Just a quick errand, will you be good and rest for me?"

Dazai nodded after a moment, the movement slow and heavy. "Where's Chuuya going?" The sleepy mumble was accompanied by a soft yawn. Dazai was going to fall asleep any second - Chuuya wondered if he'd ever be able to get Dazai quite so relaxed and loose again. It was precious to watch.

"Nowhere important. I'll be back before you know it.. I love you."

Dazai's face seemed to light up at that, as he reached his arms up to pull Chuuya into a hug, smile wide. "I love you too, Chuuya. Can't believe we're married. That's great. Goodnight."

As Dazai rambled his head lolled forwards against Chuuya's shoulder in his exhaustion, and Chuuya gently lay him back down against the pillows, adjusting the duvet so Dazai was tucked in securely. Dazai was already back to sleep, breaths coming slow and steady. Chuuya took a few more moments to stare at Dazai, at the peaceful face he'd memorised weeks ago, before he teleported out of the room.

Things had dragged on for long enough. It was time to end this.

Mmf big things are happening my dudes. Big things.

Anyway I wrote most of this chapter on the way to visit a uni, and then didn't get the chance to write again for almost two months. Don't we love college? Also uh,, sorry the promised smut scene kinda cut off before the fucc? I just.. I'm not good at writing sappy sex and all my skills to do that were used up the first time. Oops.

There will be a PWP oneshot in the future though. We will be seeing Chuuya's promised sex room. It's happening.

This was essentially the last slower paced chapter before shit properly hits the fan so.. yeah. I'm not ready. Not at all. But here we are anyway. You guys have no clue what's coming oh my god

Also ! For everyone that's commented before relating this fic in one way or another to Howls Moving Castle.. fun fact ! chances are I wouldn't have gotten the idea for this fic if I'd never watched Howl's Moving Castle. It's a big influence for me. Also for anyone that doesn't know the film is based off a book which is ! Really good ! So if you've watched the film and liked it I really really recommend reading the book bc ahhh so good. Howl was my 12 y/o crush and it is absolutely time for me to rewatch the movie.