"I'm not cut out for wedding planning," Holly announced loudly. "I can't do it, I just can't, and I don't know why anyone thought I was the girl for the job. Sure, it's my wedding, but what do I know? If it were up to me we'd elope. Wait, we practically already did that, didn't we? Urgh! It's all the talk of color stories and flower arrangements and frilly decisions, it's turning my brain to mush!"
"Overwhelmed, Captain?" Artemis asked, trying to hide his immense relief that her agitation was due to this and not because she had overheard his conversation with Butler. But he was sure, if Holly had been paying attention, she would have noticed the brief spike of fear he'd felt when she'd burst into the room.
"Entirely," Holly said. "It's only been an hour and I'm ready to have a mental break down. You're the one who's good at planning. You're the control freak. Why aren't you planning the wedding?"
"It was your idea," Artemis said, "I didn't want to impose."
"Please," said Holly, "impose."
"I'd be glad to."
"But, Holly, dear, you'll pick out the dress, won't you?" Angeline said worriedly.
"Yes," Holly relented. "The dress. I could do the dress."
"We'll make a day of it!" Angeline brightened. "You, me, and Juliet. It's bad luck for the groom to see the dress before the wedding day, you know."
"Is it?" Holly grinned conspiratorially at Artemis. "The groom won't see it then."
"Yes, wonderful," Angeline's mind was clearly already somewhere else.
"I'll step in to plan, then," Artemis said, feeling strange at being called a groom. It made this whole ridiculous plot seem more real which was, in turn, completely surreal. "Let me know if you have any requests."
"I'll think on it," Holly said, oddly hesitant. It led Artemis to believe that, possibly, she did have requests, but was unwilling to voice them. He didn't push the issue but stored the information away for later.
"Holly, you'll be staying the night, of course," Angeline said, mind coming back to the room and away, for a moment, from wedding plans. She said it with such authority that Holly just nodded. "I'm sure you know where the guest room is—the one nearest Arty's room. I've had the maids spruce it up, if you decide you'd rather sleep there."
"As opposed to where?" Artemis asked, and three pairs of eyes looked him up down like he'd just said something terribly stupid. It dawned on him that he had. Holly and Butler may have spared him the embarrassment, but his mother answered with an amused smile and a raised eyebrow.
"With you, Arty. Where else?" She fondly patted his cheek, and drifted away back to her study.
"You're not really planning to spend the night in here, are you?" Artemis asked skeptically, finding the elfin captain sprawled on her stomach across his bed when he returned from showering. She frowned.
"Would you have a problem with that, if I did?" She asked, offense and something akin to hurt edging into her voice.
"No, of course not," Artemis was quick to amend. "You're welcome here anytime you'd like. I just wondered…why?" He couldn't come up with a single reason why she should stay in his room when there was another option readily available. At their house—he still got a swell of pleasure at the words, their house—they still hadn't put together the guest room. The bed frame and mattress sat abandoned and unassembled. Artemis had made no efforts to remedy that, as the moment it was suitable to sleep in, he'd feel obligated to move there for the nights spent in Haven.
Holly looked at him, sitting up slowly, then shrugged. "I like it."
"You—," Artemis went a shade of red that could have rivaled Holly's old commander, nicknamed Beetroot for his furiously red face.
"Besides, how can we get through all of Jack London's works if I don't stay over?" She added sweetly, but the grin she flashed him did nothing to dissuade him from reading more into it than that. Whatever the specifics, Holly liked sharing space with him, liked their nighttime routine, liked waking up next to him. That meant something. It had to.
"You'll mislead me, Holly," he said it so quietly that she couldn't hear. He sometimes wanted to do just as Butler had advised and talk to Holly, if only so she would understand why she couldn't say such things to him, offer him such kindnesses and tender touches. But that, too, was selfish. With effort, he pushed those thoughts aside and continued with their usual rituals, but as he reached for the book—Call of the Wild, now, as they'd long since finished The Sea~Wolf—he came up short.
"I'm afraid I've left our book in Haven," he told her, appalled at his poor foresight.
"You didn't expect me to invade your bed topside," Holly laughed, "It's understandable."
"I apologize for the inconvenience," he said, still frowning. But Holly was smiling.
"Turn off the lights, we won't die for missing a chapter tonight."
"No, I suppose not," and he did as he was asked. But shortly after he'd receded down into the blankets, Holly carefully stepped out of the bed altogether. He wondered if she were leaving after all. But all she did was open every window in Artemis's room, including flinging the balcony doors open wide. As she crawled back into bed, Artemis smiled, overfilled with affection for his best friend. "You've completely ignored security protocol," he told her, trying to sound serious and disapproving.
"Don't worry," Holly said, "I'll protect you from any bad guys who try to climb into your room."
"Thank you, I feel entirely safe now."
"You should."
"I do."
A beat of silence.
"Artemis?"
"Yes?"
"I'll miss this."
"So will I." The moment was perfect, begging to be elaborated on. We don't have to lose this, he could say. He didn't say. Instead: "Holly?"
"Yes?" The moment swelled. I don't want to give you up, he could say. He didn't say this either.
"Earlier, what was it my mother said to get you worked up to such a state?" His question efficiently broke the moment.
"Oh," it came out as more of a laugh than anything else. "Thought you wouldn't ask."
"I'm curious to know what cracked you."
"She had me writing vows," Holly said, and Artemis chuckled.
"Already?"
"Oh, yes, she said I should start drafting them now so they'd be perfect for the wedding."
"And?"
"Well, they were damn good. All heartfelt and way too frilly. I'm sure you could've done better, since writing is one of the many, many things you're good at. But I got in the zone and was writing up a storm. Your mother," she said it like an accusation, which, Artemis supposed, it was, "was reading over my shoulder the whole time."
"Not surprising, she's terribly nosy."
"I've noticed. Anyway, she commented on it. My, uh, vows."
"I hope she was nice."
"She was—unnervingly nice. But then she asked if I'd write vows for my wedding—my actual wedding to some unnamed groom." It surprised Artemis to hear that his mother had acknowledged that the wedding she was planning was fated to be canceled, when she'd so adamantly acted as though it were inevitable. "And when I didn't answer she just started throwing all these decisions at me about meaningless pomp, you know? I felt silly, I guess. Putting so much thought and effort into something that won't happen. I got frustrated, especially since I don't care about weddings, least of all one that isn't real, but I still couldn't make a choice on what kind of napkins we should use, or if the serving plates should be silver or gold."
"Silver," Artemis said. "Given our history."
"Gold," Holly countered, "given our history."
"I thought you said you couldn't make a decision."
"Changed my mind. That's my request, and I'm the bride, so you have to listen to me."
"How many times am I going to hear that over the next months?"
"As many times as I can say it."
"Gold," Artemis mused. "I do have a fondness for it, but, are you sure it's entirely appropriate?"
"If we're getting fake married—,"
"We're already fake married," he reminded her.
"No, we're real married, just unwillingly."
"A good point," Artemis conceded. "You're entirely correct and I rescind my earlier statement."
"Yes, well, it's bound to happen sometimes. But if we're having a fake wedding, we should face it head-on, don't you think? Our history. No skirting around the bad stuff or avoiding reminders of our nefarious meeting or misadventures. If we really got married, that's how I'd want it. To be us, not a pretty and generic ceremony with meaningless fluff."
"You mean it?" He turned on his side to face her fully. She mimicked the motion. Her eyes glimmered through the dark, striking and beautiful. "You'd marry me with reminders of all the times I've hurt and betrayed you woven into the wedding?"
"You think I ever forget all you've done?" She asked solemnly. "I don't, not ever, not even for a second, Artemis. Every time I talk to you, look at you, think of you, it's all there. But I haven't ever hated you for it, not really, not since before I knew you."
"You should."
"You dumb mudboy, that's not all that we've got. We're more than the bad times. You're more than the times you've hurt me. I could tell you every moment you have, if you asked. But I can't name every moment you've made me smile, or laugh, or feel better. When I think of you, it's not just the painful things I remember. It's all the times you've saved me, too. All the times you've been there for me. We've been through a lot," Holly sighed, hand reaching to brush hair back from Artemis's eyes. He felt sparks at the contact, but knew by now that it wasn't an effect of magic, but just a byproduct of Holly's touch. "But we're stronger for it now. That's why I won't shy away from our history. It's part of us. We can't change that. And I wouldn't if I could."
"Nor would I," Artemis admitted. "I'm sorry."
"I know." Then she yawned and shifted closer to him. "And I forgive you."