"I told you no," she argues angrily. They're still standing in front of his burnt-out TIE.
"But we need your friends' help."
"Why?" she practically whines.
"The answers we need, they might be in the First Order archives," he explains.
Rey swears colorfully and Ben's eyebrows rise. Usually she keeps her Huttese vocabulary to when he has his face between her thighs.
"We'll need their help— "
"—help to access the records. Yeah, I get it." She huffs out a loud breath, stirring the curls framing her face.
Rey flops down in the captain's chair, obviously in a very touchy mood, so he keeps his counsel. He really does think she should listen to her messages.
"Well, I guess I have to contact them, find out where they even are."
"Mmmhmm," he hums out mildly. Listen to the messages, Rey. They probably told you where they are.
Now it's getting very difficult not to push her, but she sighs dramatically and holds his eyes as she flips the switch, displaying the index of communications.
Her eyes bulge and she says, "There are 14 holos and 27 voice comminiques."
Finally, he can't keep his mouth shut any longer. "Maybe pull up the last holo?"
"I know," she scoffs with bad grace.
Then a forlorn looking Finn starts to speak. "Hey, Rey … I guess you haven't gotten my other messages … uhm, we're headed to Cathne next. If you want to check-in, your code hasn't changed. Just … just tell me you're okay?"
He rubs his neck and sighs, as he bends forward to end the recording. The holo of Finn blinks out.
Her bearing has changed completely, her spine hunched over as if she's protecting herself. "I … I didn't mean for him to worry," she whispers.
"I know, sweetheart, but he cares about you. And you need to see them, I think."
BB-8 whistles excitedly and Ben is grateful for the little droid. He always manages to make Rey's mood lift, no matter how dark it grows.
"Yeah, BB-8, we're going to see Poe," she says with resignation.
"I'm trying to find Finn," she says through the comm, her frustration beginning to show. She's been arguing with various officers for the last 30 minutes.
"The magistrate?" the voice asks with incredulity.
"I don't know! Last I knew, he was General Finn."
"Ma'am, he's a very busy man, perhaps you'd like to leave a message—"
"No, I don't want to leave a message! Just tell him it's Rey, Zed Alpha 936."
"Hmmm, I know all of his personal friends—"
"Rey, his best friend Reyi!" she yells.
"Wait, did you say Zed Alpha 936?"
"Yes!" Rey cries out in exasperation.
"Oh, Maker. I'm so sorry, my lady. Please accept my apologies. I'll patch you through right away."
She throws up her hands and rolls her eyes. "Finally," she mutters. Then she makes a funny face. "My lady?"
"Rey, stars, Rey, is it really you?" Finn's voice fills the cockpit.
"Yeah … listen, I'm sorry—"
"Are you okay? I've been so worried about you! Poe, Poe, get over here. It's Rey!"
Poe's voice carries over the comm, clearly farther away. "Rey! About damned time. Hey, how's my droid?" he yells.
Rey laughs, a genuine, real laugh, making Ben smile.
"It's really good to hear your voices," and Ben mouths, Told you. He knows his bondmate, down to her marrow. Rey may have been a creature of solitude, but it's not who she really is.
"Where are you?" Finn entreats.
"Ahch-To, but I was thinking we'd come see you."
Ben looks at her sharply, certain she doesn't realize what she's said.
"We, you mean you and BB-8?" Poe asks keenly.
"Y-yeah. Of-of course," Rey stutters out, wincing.
"Well, right now we're orbiting Cathne, should be here another week or so," Finn says.
"W-I'll be there tomorrow."
Finn's voice is full of happiness when he instructs, "Just give them your code. I'll make sure they expect you to be docking."
"That reminds me, magistrate?"
"We … we have some catching up to do," Finn evades.
They're in hyperspace and Rey is finishing up her dinner. She's been very good about eating regular meals and he hasn't had to remind her once. He's hoping there will be fresh food once they get to Cathne. She loves the rehydrated rations, so much better than portions, but he'd still like to see her eat something not several years old.
"You haven't sketched in a long time," he remarks.
"Oh, well … I get to see your face every day, now."
"Maybe now you'd manage to make me look right," he teases.
"Hey! I'll have you know that's exactly as I see you."
"I know," he says with a smile. "But I'm not even remotely that handsome."
Her face falls. "Oh, Ben … why would you think that?"
Shrugging, he doesn't say anything. How can he explain how he'd never, ever fit in? That he still sees that gangly boy with huge ears?
"Well, I think you're the sexiest thing I've ever seen," she says with a crooked grin.
He manages to smile, pushing away his insecurity. "Yeah?"
"Oh, yeah," she agrees.
"Maybe you'll show me later?" he asks suggestively.
"Maybe. Though I thought I'd say up and read for a bit."
His face falls. "Oh … okay." Maybe he should give her some space … besides, he hasn't spoken with his mother in days. "Did you … did you want to be alone?"
"Ben," she says with an indulgent smile. "I'm teasing."
With that, she begins to strip while he watches eagerly.
He finds himself right back on the Falcon when he joins her in the dreaming, and she pats the bed with a hungry look. Ben lifts the blanket to find that she's already naked and he swiftly pulls off his clothes, getting into bed next to her.
The first touch of her skin against his is always a shock. The very best kind. It's like sliding into warm water, drinking hot chocolate, coming home.
All he can do is sigh out her name before asking, "Did you want me to show you something tonight?"
Her expression is wickedness itself. "If we have time."
Ben uses some choice language when he's forcibly ejected from her dream, right when he was about to fill her for the third time that night. He's extremely disoriented and frankly, pissed off. At least she'd already found her release. He rather likes that he can pull so many orgasms from her body.
But the proximity alert is blaring, and he realizes they've come out of hyperspace.
Rey is scrambling up from bed. "Bantha spit," she swears, throwing on a robe as she rushes to the cockpit. "I can't believe I slept through the hyperspace chime!"
She guides the Falcon into orbit and sets it on autopilot. Giving him a saucy wink, she says in a husky voice, "I'd say, where were we, but I probably shouldn't go back to sleep."
His sense of profound unfulfillment tells him otherwise, but he sighs, knowing she's right. "You probably want to put something on."
"You don't want me to wander around the starship in my robe?" she asks innocently.
"No," he growls. "This delectable body is just for me."
"Always," she agrees, and he draws his ghostly hand down her back, making her shiver.
"Rey!" Finn shouts before he's running towards her. Ben follows a few paces behind and steels himself for Finn and Dameron's affection. He doesn't really know what to think about the two men. He'd wronged them both, and that's going to be a reckoning when he's back. Because he's coming back, he's sure of it.
Finn lifts her up and spins her around the deck, before passing her off to Dameron, who does the same damned thing. Ben glowers and tries to keep from letting it get to him out of sorts. It's not working.
BB-8 whistles loudly, making a beeline for Dameron, nearly knocking the man over.
That's when Ben notices that her friends are in decidedly better clothing, both wearing smart uniforms made of the best quality fabrics. What in the galaxy has happened to this rag-tag group of rebels?
Dameron goes to his knees, making a truly nauseating display over his droid and Ben can't help but roll his eyes. Yes, the orange sphere of frustration has grown on him, but have some decorum, man!
"Oh, stop it, you big grump," Rey says, then panic fills her eyes.
"Big grump?" Dameron asks in confusion.
"Uhm, right … is there somewhere we can go talk?"
Ben blinks. He didn't think she planned on sharing his current state with her friends.
This should be interesting.
They'd ushered her into an empty conference room and they're all standing in front of the viewport.
"He's what?!" Dameron explodes. "That maniac is on my ship?!"
"Well, not really. He's here, but … not," Rey equivocates.
Gesturing wildly, Poe spits, "That makes no sense. And why can't I see him?"
"I honestly don't know. Maybe because you don't have the Force."
"Yeah, but I do, and I can't see him, either," Finn interjects.
"Oh … right, I forgot," Rey says sheepishly.
"What the hell is going on, Rey!" Dameron yells. "Do I need to call the guards? Is he listening to us?"
Ben snorts and crosses his arms. Though he supposes he might react the same way if their positions were reversed.
"Is this because of that dyad thing?" Finn asks, much more calmly, but still with an edge.
"Yes, we think so. It's why we're here."
"Dyad? The what now?" Dameron asks.
Rey cocks her head at Finn. "You didn't tell him?"
"You didn't say I could," he says with a falsely casual shrug.
Dameron stalks over to the head of the large conference table and sits angrily. "Okay, someone start explaining. Now."
Rey looks over at Ben and sighs, but she takes a chair to Poe's left.
Someone brought in a pitcher of caf and Ben knows he'd want something stronger, but Rey is on her third cup, making her hands shake a bit.
"Let me get this straight. You want our help to bring Kylo Ren back?" Dameron asks with ill-disguised horror.
"For the fifth time, his name is Ben Solo."
Dameron scoffs and sits back, throwing up his hands. "Oh, well I guess everything is alright then." Warily, he looks around the room. "Where is he, anyway?"
"He's standing behind me," Rey informs them.
Ben can't help but chuckle at how both men draw away and share a look of apprehension.
Dameron looks to where he thinks Ben is and snarls, "The only reason I'd help you come back is if I could throw you in prison for the rest of your stars-be-damned life."
"Poe, wait," Finn finally interjects. He'd been strangely quiet, letting Rey share their story, his expression only speculative.
"Rey, do you even know what you need is in the old First Order archives?" Finn asks.
"No," she says miserably, and Ben goes to her side so he may see her face. Her lips are trembling and she's close to tears.
"Oh, sweetheart," Ben murmurs.
Dashing at her eyes, she insists, "I'm fine, Ben."
"Yeah, that's weird," Dameron says.
Finn leans forward with imploring hands. "Come on, Poe. Try and see it from her point of view. This is her soulmate."
"This is Kylo Ren," Dameron growls.
"Stop calling him that! Stop it! Stop it!" Rey cries out and before Ben even knows what's happening, she's rushing from the conference room.
He finds her in the corridor outside, her arms around her legs and her face hidden between her knees.
Ben crouches in front of her, wishing he could hold her. "Rey, my love."
Maybe he shouldn't have encouraged her to come here, but it's too late. "Rey? he tries again.
Finally, she lifts her head. "They don't understand," she whispers. "They don't know how much I need you."
"How could they? No one could possibly fathom who we are to each other. I'm still amazed every day by how connected I feel to you."
"I want to go back to the Falcon, take a tablet. I need you," she repeats with pleading eyes.
Fear shoots up his spine. "You still have them?" he asks, trying to sound gentle.
She shrugs. "I don't like to waste things."
"Tonight, tonight I'll hold you for as long as you want. But you can't. It's not good for you."
"I don't care!" she says with a touch of venom.
"You do, though. You know you do." He doesn't know what he'll do if she starts to waste away again.
He's impossibly relieved when she nods, even if it is a bit sullenly. "They aren't going to help us."
"We don't know that. I think … I think Finn is going to surprise you."
As if conjured, the door snicks open and Finn passes right through Ben as he takes the same position in front of Rey. Ben leaps back, the sensation distinctly odd.
Finn puts his arms around her and Rey melts into him. Ben tries not to let it bother him, but it's killing him to not be able to be the one comforting her. He truly doesn't know where to look next if there's nothing in the archives. He knows his heart wouldn't survive disappointing her like that.
She clings to Finn like her life depends on it. Perhaps it does. He's going to have to convince her to get rid of those damned sleeping tablets, immediately.
After a long while, Finn pulls back. "Rey, sweetie, it's gonna be okay. I think Poe will really listen now."
Rey sniffles lightly. "He hates Ben."
Finn's expression grows hard. "Well, I'm not sure I can ever forgive him for what he did to me. I still have a scar the length of my back."
Ben scrubs at his face with his hands, beginning to comprehend that things will get very complicated once he's back. Will they even give him a chance to prove himself? Will this all be in vain?
He hadn't thought about that. Countless systems would have reason to want to see him tried. Even executed. Gods, what he comes back to her, only to be ripped from her again? She'd never recover, in this life or the next.
"But Snoke, or Palpatine, whoever, he was in his head, all that time! He groomed Ben, hurt him. It wasn't his fault!" Rey pleads.
Finn and Ben both say, "Yes, it was," at the same time.
Rey looks back and forth between them but doesn't say anything.
"What did you say to Poe to make him ready to listen?"
"I reminded him that Ben Solo was, is, Leia Organa's son."
Back in the conference room, Dameron sits with his arms crossed in front of his chest, but he's no longer bellowing.
"So, he really sacrificed himself to save you?" Dameron asks, obviously putting great effort into staying calm.
"Without hesitation," Rey says firmly.
"And you don't know this will work …" the former pilot asks with something approaching hope in his tone.
Rey's face crumples and her shoulders fall. "We don't even know what we need to do. But we have to try. Please, help us. Help me."
Ben desperately wishes he could talk to them, explain what was happening to Rey without him. He's not sure she can function with this bifurcated existence. Besides, now that he's had the fantasy, he wants their children so badly. If that's even possible with his past …
Dameron sighs, loudly, and frowns. He unfolds his arms and looks at his hands for a long time. Eventually, he sits back in his chair. "Oh, what the hell. Yeah, okay. We'll help."
Rey leaps from her chair and wraps her arms around Dameron's neck. "Thank you!"
Then she steps away and looks back and forth between her friends. "Now, will someone please explain to me this magistrate business? And why did that officer call me, 'my lady'?"
A/N: Thank you, ArtemisBare, who edited TWO chapters for me today! Rock. Star.
Thank you, Readers! I've started another fic. I know, I know. But I won't be abandoning this and plan to write them in tandem. The other is called 'Lovesick' and is posted here on FF. It features a 19-year-old Ben and a time travelling Rey. Come on by and meet Besotted Ben and Reluctant Rey!
Thank you all so much for reading! I wish we could all come up with a drinking game for TRoS, then heckle the screen together. It would be cathartic. Or we'd all be sobbing into our cups.