Kelsey closes her eyes, listing to the water running in the shower behind her. Hmmm!
She lifts the towel that she has wrapped around her naked body. Looking at her stomach, gently stroking it with her hand, wondering if she'll ever get it back into shape again. Whether she'll ever regain her fitness levels.
Mmmm! She sighs, closing her eyes smiling as Clay wraps himself around her from behind. His arms crossing over around her waist, holding her. "You okay?" he whispers quietly in her ear.
Mmmm hmm! She nods "Yeah fine"
"What're you thinking about?"
"Oh, nothing really" She smiles looking at him, his reflection in the mirror looking at her.
"So, you want me to wash your hair? " he brushes it to one side and kisses her neck.
She smiles, biting her lip. She can feel him pressing his groin, semi hard, tight against her butt "Clay what the hell are you doing?"
"Just checking, if can I join you. I wanna be close to you"
"Clay... " she laughs out loud ".. I'm telling you right now, you haven't got a hope in hell of that coming anywhere near me. So sorry, do not even think about it!" She turns around in his hold, wrapping her arms around his neck, stroking the back of his head gently.
"Oh no! God no!" he frowns "No, that's not want I meant! NO!" he looks down as he can see the hard bulge sitting in his pants as he holds her "Just ignore him " He smiles "You should know by now; he does his own thing" he laughs " I just wanted to be with you. I'll wash your hair for you."
She looks over her shoulder and sighs, looking at the crib she can see in the bedroom "What about him? Shouldn't one of us keep an eye?"
"Ahhh...now see. I have that it in hand too." he holds up his phone and smiles "I have a baby monitor, with a camera and .. and an app! You can download it on your phone too. See we can see him wherever we are in the apartment."
She looks at the screen and the picture of the baby sleeping. She frowns curiously "Wow! You really thought of everything "
"Oh yeah, yeah I have" he kisses her neck "You know I've .. I've got Davis sorting ISR, for when I get spun up" he laughs " So, I can keep an eye on you both"
"Really?" She smiles "So you gonna be tracking us, right?"
"Oh, you can count on i.! See, I have all this specialist technology to hand"
"Right" she frowns looking at him "Actually, how far does that camera thing go?"
"Oh! I don't know, I haven't checked the range, I'll have a look later" Clay's stripping off. He takes his pants off, now standing in front of her in only in his tight white boxer shorts "So, do you want me to wash your hair?"
She smiles. Looking at him, her eyes wandering over his bare chest, down the muscles on his arms. Thinking how good his body looks. The tight shorts cling to the curve of his butt. She can't help keep smiling, while his hands find their way under her towel, working their way around her waist, stroking her skin.
As he touches her stomach and tries to take her towel off, she suddenly gets another pang of self-doubt, conscience about how her body looks, and she puts her hand to the towel, stopping him, holding it tight against her "Clay, I...I don't think this is a good idea"
"Hey..." he kisses her neck; he can feel her tense apprehension. His lips find hers, and as he kisses her he pulls at the towel which she finally concedes and lets go of as he pulls her body to towards him. He wants her to feel secure, to not worry. "Kelsey, you're beautiful. You just gave me a perfect son. I just wanna be close to you"
The comfort is nice, and she leans in tight, resting her head against his naked shoulder. Then she looks down and she can see his natural reaction to being close to her naked. " Clay Spenser, put that away!" she smiles
"Sorry, I told you. I can't help it, not when I'm close to you like this"
She smiles tips her head, exposing the gap between her neck and shoulder, and he gently strokes his fingers along it, following a line up to her cheek. He drops some kisses along her skin, around and across the back of shoulder then gently pushing her head over, he repeats on the other side.
"C'mon" he slips his under shorts off, then takes her hand, leading her into the shower.
While he takes the shampoo from the rack, squeezing some into his hand and stroking it through her long hair. She's letting the warm water sooth down the front of her chest, over the tender fullness of her breasts.
Mmmm! she groans at how nice it feels, the relief. Ahhh! "That's so nice" She leans back against his touch, relaxing.
He turns her around, using the water spray to rinse the soap from her locks. Her eyes closed, she puts her head back in the warmth as she can feel his hand gently moving softly over her stomach then drawing a line up the curve of her side, touching her breast.
Sssssss! She sucks in air through her teeth, as he accidentally touches the tender area on her breast "Clay, careful" It's not so much pain more the sensitiveness of them
"Sorry! I didn't realise"
"It's okay." She looks up, her hand stroking his face. Her body pressed, gently, against his. He can feel the firmness of her breasts against his chest as he leans forward and kisses her.
Then they stop kissing, their lips part and they smile at each other. Both able to hear the loud sounds of crying. Clay looks over at his phone, where he placed it on the bathroom shelf "You finish up, I'll go sort him out!"
He steps out of the shower, grabbing a towel and wrapping it around his waist "Casey!... It's okay, Daddy's comin!"
o-o-o-o-o-o
Kelsey steps out of the bathroom into the bedroom. She's wearing another of Clay's bigger Tee shirts "Oh my god! What the hell is that smell?"
"Um ..yeah, it's his diaper. It is pretty bad." Clay smiles.
He has Casey laid on the changing mat on the bed. His nappy undone and Kelsey smiles as she watches him, trying his best, to change him "What the hell are you doing, Clay?" she laughs, looking as he struggles with the diapers.
"You know I wasn't really sure how this went, but what the hell is that stuff?" he points at the black in the diaper "Is it meant to be like that, or do you think we need a doctor? "
She smiles, frowning at the black gooey diaper "Um...yeah, I think...I think it's meant to be like that, well at least for a while. In one of the maternity guides I had, back home, it said it would be like that for a few days, though I never imagined it that bad!"
He looks up at her with a frown, then he looks toward his phone lying on the bed in front of him. She smiles. She already knows what he's thinking "Yes Clay, you can check!" She laughs as she finishes changing him. She's much quicker than him at changing the diaper and its quickly cleaned up. "You know I think we should bath him, tomorrow"
She picks him up and then lays him back in his crib. Watching him as he closes his eyes, she strokes his cheek gently with the back of her hand. Then she turns back to her own bed and lifting the quilt she gets in, Clay getting in the other side next to her. They snuggle close to each other. Her back up tight against his chest, him spooning his arms gently around her, kissing her neck. "Oh wait! Hold right there. I've got something to show you"
"Clay, just got to sleep. You can show me tomorrow"
"No! No, I need to show you now. Close your eyes"
"Clay, can't this wait? I'm so tired"
"No, I said... close... your eyes!" he stares at her as he fiddles with something at the side of the room "You got them closed? No cheating!"
Mmmm hmm! She smiles "They're closed."
"Right hold on. Don't open them until I say so" he climbs back into bed as she lays on her back. "Okay you can open them now!"
She blinks them open, to what was a dark room, which is now filled with the low glow of small spinning stars on the ceiling. "Clay..." She smiles " what is this?"
"It's a night light. I got it today. It's supposed to aid peaceful sleep" he smiles reading the blurb from the box. "But I figured if you need to feed him in the night, then you don't have to put the bright side lamp on"
Awww! she smiles at how thoughtful he's been "It's really beautiful, Clay. Thank you"
She lays back watching as the small white stars dance over their heads. It's soothing and she takes his hand in hers, linking her fingers through his, holding it tight under her chin and her tired eyes start to close.
o-o-o-o-o-o
"Kelsey!" Clay frowns standing over her holding Casey close to his chest " Kels ... .you awake?"
Mmmm! " What?!" she groans. Her head feels like it's been hit with by a steam roller. And now as she comes around from the deep sleep she was in, she can hear the sound of crying "Oh god, not again! Please..." she sighs "just a couple more hours. What the hell's the time ?"
"It's just gone six"
"Oh god, is he serious? It's only three hours since he last fed. What's wrong with him?" she looks up frowning at the pair of them stood there "You sure he needs feeding?"
She rubs at her head, trying to erase the tiredness from her eyes as she tries to prop herself up in the pillows on the bed. "Okay, give him here then"
"Sorry" Clay passes the baby from his arms to hers " I think he's hungry. I changed him and tried to settle him through there, so we didn't disturb you, but he's not having it. I think he needs you, or you know "
"Right okay." she sighs " You know this feeding on demand thing, it's okay, but I just wish he could go a bit longer" She slumps back into the pillows, lifting the Tee shirt she's wearing and puts him to her breast again.
"Hey, it's early days, you'll get there. You want me to get you a drink? While you feed him."
Mmmm "Yeah a coffee would be great, please!"
"Oh um.. coffee?" He frowns "Sorry, um... you know can't have coffee, right. Not while breastfeeding." He looks at his lists he has stored on his phone "It's one of the things on the banned food list"
"Banned food list? " She frowns " What banned food list? I mean I knew I couldn't drink, but coffee? Are you serious?"
"Yeah, it's um.. it's not recommended. You should avoid. I can get you some juice?"
"Juice! At six am, with three hours sleep!" She looks at him staring hard, blinking, trying to wake up so she can focus on what he's talking about " You're joking me right? That is a joke. A wind up?" She's furious at him right now.
"No, no joke. It's true. I read caffeine should be avoided"
"Avoided! But it doesn't say I can't have any does it? So how much does it say on your list!"
"Umm... " he can tell she's not happy with this "I guess, I mean maybe a cup, or two"
"Then go make me a coffee, unless you want that list to disappear somewhere very uncomfortable!" she leans back sighing as she latches Casey on, and closes her eyes."Oh my god what is he on!"
o-o-o-o-o-o
"Thanks" she looks up from Casey as Clay finally comes back with the coffee "Clay, come and sit here, with us" She smiles, patting the bed beside her with her hand " We need to talk about a few things. I ... I need to go to the shops today. You know, I need to get some clothes, some bras things like that" She smiles apprehensively. "I can't keep slobbing around in your tee shirts forever"
"Well I think you look sexy in them " He smiles dropping a kiss on her lips. Its his way of apologising about the coffee incident. He realised maybe he was going a little over the top "Sure, we could have a walk out. You know take the new wheels. Show him off"
"Sure. I'm um..." She frowns anxiously, unsure how he's going to respond to her next suggestion " I was also thinking I might get some bottles, and maybe express some milk. I mean you could feed him then too. Kind of a bit of a compromise?...You know I think it would help, take some pressure off"
"Well sure it's something we can think about. But l like I said it's still early days, I mean you don't have to do that right away"
"Clay... " she sighs "I have thought about it. I need to do this"
He sighs long and hard and she can hear from his tone that he's not happy about it. But neither does he want to get in an argument right now. not while she feeding Casey "Okay, well we can go later this morning. You know, I thought maybe I'd put Ash off anyway. We can see him another day?"
She frowns watching him "Why would you want to put him off? Clay he's your father. You need to tell him about this. For god sake, it's his grandson. Hey look, I know things between you two, they're not great but... Casey needs him in his life. Anyway, he might even make a good babysitter." she laughs.
Huh! Clay frowns "You really don't know him do you. That man is not babysitting, I'm telling you that now! His track record with kids, he's not having any part in his life. Probably milk it for some book he's writing, knowing him"
"Clay, you don't mean that. Look you're right I don't know him, but if I don't meet him I won't get to know him. But you do need to do this. Why don't you ask him to come this afternoon?" She smiles at him "Clay, come here" she pulls his head forward and kisses him "It'll be fine."
"Okay" Clay sighs "maybe you're right. Guess we may as well get it over with. But don't let him fool you. He has a tendency to try and do that" He kisses her, stroking Casey's cheek as he continues to feed "Oh there's a couple of things I need to tell you too. I um.. I have to go in to work, tomorrow. It's a...a training thing. Something because we're possibly getting spun up next week. You want me to skip it? I mean I can tell Jason I'm not ready yet "
No! No why would you tell him that? You should go. Clay, I'll be fine. We both know that you have to go back to work. We both knew that from the start. The first times gonna be the hardest, but it'll be okay And hey, it might be me soon too, right?" She frowns, looking at him, trying to gauge his reaction to her comment.
"You?! " he frowns "What the hell? What, you're seriously thinking of going back, in the Navy?"
She bites her lip, lifting Casey off her breast and holding him as he now sleeps in her arms "Maybe ?!" she shrugs "I don't know. I mean there's still a lot to sort out, but...but my maternity leave is officially six weeks, I mean I can extend it to for longer, even up to a year, but the time frame would be down do my commanding officer. It all depends how quickly I could get my fitness back. Then maybe..."
Huh! He looks at her shock. Then taking Casey from her arms, he holds him tight to his chest "How the hell's that gonna work? How are you gonna look after him if you go back? I can't believe you're seriously thinking about this. That you never said anything before now. But you can be away at sea for months. When did you think this up?"
"I've never not thought about it. Not since they told me it was a possibility. And being away doesn't necessarily mean a long deployment. They don't happen all that often. Usually just a couple of weeks at a time. Clay, it's just something to think of. "
She sighs watching the look on his face "I mean we'd have to get a watertight family plan in place first. It's one of the conditions. Find a guardian" she can see how this is not going down well. She anxiously rubs at her tired head "Like I said, it's just considering options, Nothing's definite. And like you said, it's still early days." she sighs.
She can see it hasn't gone down at all well with him "I'm gonna get dressed. You okay with him for a minute?"
"Yeah! " he snaps at her "Yeah course I am" He carries him, tucked tight in his arms against his chest, through to the living room.
She lays back in the bed. Good one Kelsey. She sighs. That went well! Not!
o-o-o-o-o-o
"Hey" she smiles "Is he asleep?"
Clay looks up from watching the TV. He has Casey, in his rocker seat and he's sound asleep as Clay rests his hand on it, gently rocking it back and forward "Yeah he's fine!"
"Shift up!" She moves in to sit next to him. Snuggling her head against his shoulder.
"Oh um…I spoke to Ash, he's is gonna come this afternoon"
"That's great. Did you tell him, on the phone, about the baby?"
"No! No, thought I'd wait till he got here. Good thing is he has a studio meeting, so he won't be able to stay long. But as you keep telling me, everything's gonna be fine, right?"
"Clay, don't say it like that. But yeah everything will work out"
"Oh, and um...I forgot to say, what with your little bombshell in there earlier. Ray and Naima, they've invited us to a Barbecue they're holding on Sunday. Want us to all meet at the park near them. Like a meet and greet so that everyone from my team, can come see him and meet you. " He pauses looking at her "You know Blackburn, Davis , Brock, maybe Cerb" he smiles "Think Full metal and Trent gonna make it too. Oh, and Jason's daughter Emma, she's gonna be home from college"
"Oh! Really? Well that's a lot of people." she smiles anxiously "Don't you think it might be a bit much, too soon?"
"Doesn't sound too soon to me" he shrugs, acting obviously annoyed "I mean, if you're already considering getting back in the Navy, in what... six weeks!? Then what's the problem with a barbecue, Sunday?"
"Clay..." she sighs "please don't. I told you, it's just something for us to think about. Obviously we need to talk a lot more about it first. But ...look, what would you have me do?" Hmmm! "Stay home all day?"
"Well yeah! Yeah now you ask, that's exactly what I would do. I'm sorry, I know you don't like it but .. but I would! Well at least for a few months, a year maybe. To look after our son. So, is this why the rush, to stop breastfeeding?" Hmmm "Is that why?"
"No! No of course not, that's just... " she sighs "So what, you want me to stay home all day? But I don't hear you offering to stay home. "
He bites his lip as he frowns, staring at her "You know that's different. You know being a SEAL, it doesn't work like that."
"No, no I guess it doesn't!" She snaps She can feel herself getting emotional and annoyed "Sorry!" she sighs, taking a breath, calming herself as she leans back into the couch pillows "Sorry, I'm just tired. I didn't mean to snap like that." She sighs again "Look Clay, I know there'd be a lot to work out. It might not even be possible." She frowns, watching him while he's looking at her, putting her hand on his cheek, the rough of his stubble against her fingers. She smiles, then kisses him.
"Oh yeah there's one other thing, while we're talking about stuff. We um... we need to find out about getting him a passport. From what I saw he's gonna need a US one, well at least until I get back to the UK and sort it all out. It turns out .. " She smiles "he's now an American citizen, so we have to apply here."
"A passport?! Seriously, for what? I mean it's not like he's going anywhere. So, why the rush?"
"No rush." she smiles "Just... just something we need to sort out. I thought you might know how to go about it, that's all. I'm just talking. I mean, I can't fly for a couple of weeks anyway"
"Fly? Why would you, where do you need to go?"
"Well I'm... I'm gonna have to go back, to the UK, at some point. I need to get things, sort out my flat, paperwork all kinds of things. I mean this, having him here. It wasn't planned, things got left."
"Yeah well it's not something we need to sort yet" Clay takes a deep breath, he's really annoyed. All this talk is moving too fast and he doesn't like it "You know, I think we should bath him, before we go out" Clay gets up taking Casey from his rocker seat and goes to the bedroom
"Clay!" she sighs closing her eyes. Shit! She sighs, running her hands through her hair then she picks up her phone from the side table in front of her. Checking the text messages on it.
Alex! She looks nervously behind her, checking the bedroom doorway. She can hear Clay moving things around. Wondering how she's now going to tell him about Alex's impending visit on top of everything else. Shit!
"Hey Kelsey!" he calls out from the bedroom "You coming to help me with him?"
"Yeah sure, now coming!" She sighs, checking the text on her phone first.
Flight number BA 125678
Sunday arrive 13:00 US time
I'll get hire car at airport. Text me anything else you need me to bring. Think I've found everything for now. I also collected the mail up and will bring that.
See you Sunday Alex. X
Shit! He's not going to like this! Oh god! Why the hell did I ask him to come? SHIT!
She closes her eyes, letting out a long anxious sigh before leaning her head back against the pillows on the couch.