Clara's P.O.V.

We got back to the Cave around nine o'clock. I helped Amanda back to her room.

"Can we trust you not to run away this time?" I asked jokingly, leaning against the doorframe.

"I'll be fine," she said. Her words were clipped. "I know that you can help me better than Patty can."

"Amanda." She turned around to look at me. "If you ever need me, I will always be here for you. My room is just down the hall." She nodded.

I left, making sure to close the door behind me. We had recently installed security cameras in her room, deciding that it was best for her. I still wasn't so sure. Wally decided to take the first watch.

I stumbled into my room searching for something more comfortable to wear. I pulled on a t-shirt and shorts, and I laid down on my bed, trying to sleep. I stared holes into the ceiling. I knew that I wouldn't be spending the night here.

Night Wing's P.O.V.

With Batman busy with installing new cameras in Amanda's room, it gave me time to take down the ones in my room. He didn't have to know every single little detail about my life. Or Clara's. I knew that privacy was the most important thing to her. Which was why there were no cameras in her room, either.

I took my shirt off and picked up the remote, flipping through channels on the television. But I was distracted. All I could think about was Clara. About last night, about her bare abdomen in the ship and the remark about almost breaking. About the hopelessness I'd felt when she died. Was that what it was going to be like if I broke things off with her?

Batman's order was still running through my mind when I heard a small knock at the door. I knew it was Clara. She eased the door open softly, standing there in a t-shirt and shorts, like yesterday. I noticed it was my shirt and remembered the wardrobe I'd made for her when she joined.

"Hey."

"Hi." She walked to the side of the bed that was unoccupied and crawled in. The heat from her body quickly filled the space. She glanced at the television.

"What were you watching?"

I grinned at her. "I was looking for something we could watch together."

She laughed. "Please. They won't have anything good on this guide." She grabbed the remote and pressed a few buttons. Then she turned the television on and off. The channel list had completely changed. It was all movies.

I laughed. "How did you do that?"

She grinned and nestled closer to me. "My mom taught me." The smile disappeared from her face.

I wrapped my arm around her. "Hey. It's okay."

She twisted to look at me. "No, it's not." She sighed and laid back down. "I have to tell you something."

I gulped nervously. I searched through my memory of the past five minutes to see if I'd said anything wrong. I came up empty-handed. That made me even more nervous. I didn't know what to brace myself for.

"You really want to know what happened in the past few years?"

I nodded slowly. She sighed. "I told you about Amelia, right?" I nodded again. "She was... she was an assassin. For the League of Shadows." She twisted to look at me again. It was all I could do to keep my mouth from dropping into the shape of an O.

That was how she was so strong. How she was so powerful. How she was the first one to beat Black Canary. She was their enemy. This was why she was so afraid of them. She didn't want to join the Team.

Tears started rolling down her beautiful face. "I hope you still care about me."

I pulled her close and kissed her. "Of course I do. This is not who you are. This is who you were."

I brushed away some tears on her cheek with my thumb. She pushed my hand away. "I'm not done." She sniffled. "When my father captured everybody, it wasn't to keep and interrogate us. It was to tell me that they knew where I was. Same with the man who stuck needles in us. They know where I am. I'm putting all of you in danger by being here." She paused, and I tried to speak, but she cut me off. "I have to leave. It's not safe for you anymore." She placed a hand on the side of my face.

"Whoa whoa whoa. Wait. Slow down." I brushed her hand away. "No one is going anywhere."

"Dick I-"

"NO. Clara, is this what you meant when you said you were almost broken?"

Another tear slipped out. "Yes. Not only did they train me physically, but psychologically. They trained me to withstand torture. To not show any emotion. Long after I left them, the memories still stayed with me. That's why it's not fair that Amanda gets her episodes erased. She doesn't have to relive the torture again, and again, and again. It's not fair."

Sobs wracked her and she pressed her face against my chest. I pulled her closer and brushed the knots out of her hair. "Do you know why her memories of the flashback were erased?" I paused before continuing. "It's because she's not nearly as strong as you," I murmured into her hair.

"I don't want to be strong anymore!" she whispered. "I just want to be normal."

"You don't have to be strong around me," I said to her. "No one is always strong, all the time."

She stopped for a moment to look at me. "But you know what happens when I slip up. You felt it."

I paused again. Ugh, why did she have to be so damn smart? "That wasn't your fault. It was mine."

"You can't keep blaming all my mistakes on yourself. It will catch up to you."

I sighed. I wish she would just... believe in herself. For once.

"Dick?" she asked suddenly.

"Yeah?"

When she looked at me, her eyes were red. She put her hands on my shoulders and stared into my eyes.

"I love you."

It was the first time she said it to me.

She laid back down and fell asleep. I stared at the ceiling, thinking about our conversation. But Batman's order cast dread over my thoughts. I couldn't do that. To her. To me. I brushed my hands through her hair and tried to fall asleep.