Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters from the Inuyasha universe or any of the popular name brand apps, products, services, etc. The rest is mine.
Chapter 18
"I don't want it to end, Sesshomaru. I don't know what to do," Inuyasha sighed into his phone to his older brother as he waited for Kagome to arrive. He leaned over the railing on his balcony and looked down at the world in the twilight, pressing his arm against its cold edge. A nearly empty beer bottle dangled from his fingers and he tapped it against the metal bar.
He had tried calling her to hear her voice instead, but her phone was dead. That had been an issue lately. Her phone battery was at critical health, and the charger in her car must have had some brittle wires or something as well because it wouldn't charge her phone on the drive here either. Sometimes he couldn't reach her until she magically arrived and immediately plugged her phone in to charge in his apartment.
So he was now stuck on the phone with his brother instead, telling him all of the woes of his love life.
It was true, too.
He didn't know when it had happened, but as the summer slowly passed, the thought of ending whatever this had become began to hurt more and more.
It had really hit home last weekend at the book fair. They had stopped at one booth that had a lovely little edition of Pride and Prejudice that she had been tempted to buy. The cover was leather, and the edges were beautifully gilded...but she had felt that it was a bit out of her price range.
She had mentioned to him previously that it was one of her favorite books and movies. She had read it in high school and fallen in love with Jane Austen, and her favorite English teacher had given her a copy as a graduation present.
That edition was now falling apart.
When he had asked her about it and why she didn't just replace the tattered thing with the new one she liked, it had come up that he had never read the book or watched the movie. He was more of a math and science kid, whereas she was more driven by English and art and history.
She had joked lightly that between the two of them, their kids would have ample help with homework.
That...that had made him feel things. He knew she was just joking. She had to have been, right? But...the way it made him feel…
Fuck...what was this woman doing to him?
He had ultimately gone back and bought the book as soon as she had gone to the bathroom, and he was glad because when she got out, she had decided that he was right. She could use a replacement copy. She was crushed when they had gone back to get it and the book was "gone".
He had silently pleaded with the vender to not say anything to her about who had just purchased it. He didn't need her knowing that he had bought her a farewell present.
Instead, he had comforted her by watching the movie that night and holding her in his arms...and all the while he felt this...hole opening inside of himself.
Things just hadn't been the same since.
'Do you want advice or do you want to keep stupidly bitching about your love life?' his brother snorted, drawing him back to their conversation.
"I'm not bitching. I'm venting."
'You can alter the vernacular all you like, but it won't change the fact that I've heard you bitch about this for the last hour,' he replied coolly, and Inuyasha rolled his eyes.
Why had he thought this was a good idea again?
Oh right.
He didn't think.
That was the problem.
If he had been smart, he would have kept to himself. The problem was that he wasn't smart.
"I'm allowed to be upset!" he snapped, pushing away from the railing and slumping down into the couch. He glanced down at the lime green cushion and was unexpectedly hit by waves of memories of them sitting here: Their first date. Having sex against the wall. Just laying here and enjoying each other's company. He groaned and finished his beer and pulled out another one, deftly opening it.
"She leaves soon, and I'll probably never see her again..." he mumbled for the umpteenth time.
'And we've established that this is troubling to you.'
"Because it is! She's...she's amazing. She's funny and sweet and kind and sexy and she's so easy to be around—"
'—I know,' Sesshomaru sighed. 'And as much as I'd love to talk about that for the next three hours, I have other things to worry about. Like replacing Rin's frog.'
"You killed Jaken?" Inuyasha laughed, picturing his eldest niece's pet. She loved that thing for reasons no one could understand.
'No one killed him. He was just dead one morning, and I saw no need to replace him until she came back from summer camp.'
"In case you killed him again?" he snickered.
'Because then I wouldn't have to worry about taking care of it,' he snapped back, only making Inuyasha laugh more.
"You know she will be able to tell the difference."
'She's twelve. I'm not that concerned.'
"Famous last words," he taunted. "You should just come clean," he advised.
'She will never go to summer camp willingly again if I do that, and Kagura and I need some time to ourselves,' he groused, and Inuyasha just snickered harder at that.
"What, finding it hard to have alone time since you had kids?"
'I hope you realize that when it's your turn, I will not help you.'
"Please...like I'd want your help. You'd probably just 'accidentally' drop my kid on their head. They're safer off with you at a distance."
'Really? And how would Kagome feel about you keeping their uncle at a distance?'
Inuyasha sputtered at that for a second, much to his brother's delight.
"She has two brothers," he finally replied. "They will be just fine in the uncle department, thanks...but you're making some pretty damn big assumptions, Sesh."
'Do you want to know what I really think, idiot?'
"Idiot? What's this? Feeling affectionate tonight?"
'Fuck you.'
"Oh, Sesh...I love you, too!"
'Do you want my opinion or not?' he growled.
"Yeah...what the hell...lay it on me," he sighed, taking a big swig from his beer.
'Exactly. What the hell. Just ask her to stay with you.'
"She can't. She has to go back to school and finish her degree. I can't ask her to give that up."
'No, you idiot. Long distance.'
"Ah…"
'Ah? Really?'
"I just…I don't think she would be open to that. It's...hard. And she knows that. I told you...she made it clear from the beginning that once she was gone, this was over. That's what we both agreed to. We were just fucking around - no pun intended. I don't know if things will really have changed that much for her."
'And you will never know if they have until you ask her,' he replied smoothly.
"Yeah…" he agreed with a sigh. "But...I don't know if I can."
'You are many things, Inuyasha...but I didn't think coward was one of them.'
"What's that supposed to mean?"
'It means that if you're going to be this upset about losing her, then grow some damn balls and do something about it. Ask the woman to stay with you. Best case? You continue your relationship long distance and see what the future has in store for you. Worst case? You make a fool out of yourself and you never see her again...which you are currently on the path to doing now as it is. The only difference between asking and not asking is that you at least have a chance at happiness.'
Well...fuck him for making everything sound so damn logical. As much as he wanted to, he couldn't find fault with anything he had said.
'Your silence tells me that I managed to get through that thick skull of yours. If that was all, I should go and get Jaken the Second.'
"You can't be serious...you can't name him that!"
'I can, and I will. I just won't give Rin his full name.'
"I still think you're making a mistake," he replied with a shake of his head.
'And you are a fool if you don't do something about this girl since she is all you seem capable of talking about, Inuyasha.'
"And Jaken," he joked lightly before hanging up with his brother.
He sat there silently stewing over his conversation with his brother for a few more minutes before gathering up his beer bottles and trash and going back into his apartment. He threw everything away and glanced at the time.
She was running late. He quickly dialed her, hoping that her phone had enough of a charge at this point for the call to land, but he was out of luck. It went straight to voicemail. Still...he was sure she was fine.
He was just going to have to have a conversation with her about responsibility and getting a charger in case something happened and...oh my god what was wrong with him?! He was doing it again - getting all involved and overly concerned. If he asked her to stay and she said no...fuck...he was just screwing himself over.
He needed to take his mind off of this. He sighed and rubbed his eyes, finally deciding that he could at least start working on dinner. He wasn't in the mood for more take-out, even if it did give them more time together. He was in the mood for fish tacos, so he had picked up the stuff to cook that at the store earlier along with some white wine to go with them.
He sighed and asked his Alexa to play NPR for him, hoping that the radio and news would take his mind off of her absence. He began to prep for dinner, chopping up all of the vegetables, cilantro, and mango before sorting them into containers. He then mixed together the guacamole and puréed everything for the arroz verde.
Finally, as he was about to put on the rice, he heard a knock at the door. A sense of relief washed over him. He turned the burner off and opened his door, pulling the sheepish looking woman outside into his arms and immediately burying his face into her neck. He deeply inhaled, letting her calming scent wash over him and reassure him that she was fine.
"Hey," she whispered, running her hands up his back in a soothing motion.
"Hey," he murmured, placing a kiss at the juncture of her neck. "I missed you - I was worried about you," he admitted as he pulled away, and she winced.
"Sorry," she apologized. "The charger…"
"Yeah...I know," he sighed, pulling her into the apartment and watching as she hung her purse on the coat closet handle.
"Do me a favor...just take one of mine? You give me a heart attack when you drive without one and your phone is dead."
"Yes, Pumpkin," she teased, and he frowned at her. He knew what she was trying to do. Pumpkin had become her nickname for him when she was annoyed or wanted to tease him. He wasn't going to take the bait this time, though.
"Hey…I'm serious," he said as he ran his hand through his hair, and she turned around to look at him. Her eyes instantly softened, and her lips turned up in a small smile.
"You really were worried, weren't you?"
"I couldn't reach you...anything could have happened."
"Well," she began, her smile widening, "I'm here now. I'm perfectly fine, and I'm not leaving again until Sunday. You don't have to worry about me until then, ok? And I'll take a spare charger, if that will make you feel better."
"Yeah - it will," he smiled, pulling her back into his arms and placing a sweet, tender kiss to her lips.
"Mmm…" she sighed, burrowing into him for a moment before she pulled away and took note of what he was cooking. "What's for dinner? Mexican?"
"Yeah," he smiled, stepping away from her and reaching into the fridge to take out the white wine and guacamole he had made. He handed the bottle to her, and she twisted off the top as he went for the glasses. "Fish tacos."
She made a choked snort-like sound as he opened his cabinets, and he pulled away to raise a brow at her and ask her if she was ok.
"Yeah...fish tacos? Really?"
"What's wrong with fish tacos?"
"Nothing," she laughed. "You really missed me, huh?"
"You know I did," he replied, furrowing his brow in confusion as he took down the glasses. "What do fish tacos have to do with missing you, though?"
She just grinned and took the glasses from him, placing them on the island before taking his hand and moving it to the front of her pants so that he was cupping her core.
"Fish tacos?" she replied, her eyes dancing with laughter.
He tilted his head to the side for a moment before his cheeks flushed and he rolled his eyes, removing his hand.
"Oh my God...really? That's where you go when you hear fish tacos?"
"I just know how much you enjoy your...ahem...tacos."
He just rolled his eyes again and opened the bag of chips, pouring them into a bowl.
"It's ok...I missed your taquito all week." she added.
"First of all," he began, dipping a chip into the guacamole, "It's a burrito, not a taquito," he stated emphatically, making her laugh as she poured their wine and he ate his chip. "Second, get your mind out of the gutter, Higurashi! It's just Mexican food. I was in the mood for it, so I'm making it."
"I mean, if you just wanted a fish taco, I would have been happy to help…"
"Ka-go-me…" he groaned, turning around and turning on the burner again heat the oil and brown the rice he had started prepping before she arrived. "Stop reading into this! Clearly you're horny as hell, but it's literally just Mexican food."
She laughed harder at that and wrapped her arms around him from behind, and he could feel her whole body shaking from the force of her giggles.
"Ok…" she relented. "So...fish tacos, huh? What else did you have in mind for tonight?"
"Well, I know what you have in mind," he replied, and she giggled again.
"I told you...It's been a long week without your taquito."
"Keep calling it that and you won't get it," he snorted, adding the rice to the pot.
"Oh my...is that a serious threat?" she laughed. He couldn't help but smile.
"Maybe? Care to find out?"
"No...that's alright. It's not worth the risk," she grinned.
"Good. Can you keep an eye on this for me while I start the fish? Just stir it a little and don't let it burn."
"Sure," she agreed, watching him dip back into his fridge and pull out the fillets he had prepared earlier before grabbing a pan and heating it with oil.
"You know...I really do appreciate it when you cook for me," she commented, stirring the rice. "It makes me feel special," she admitted with a small smile as he placed the fish into the pan.
"You are special," he grinned, leaning over to place a kiss on the top of her head.
Very special.
One of the most special people he had ever met.
He blushed and turned his attention back to the fish, glancing back at her quickly to see the genuine smile his words had caused her to wear on her face.
"So...we never discussed what we're doing tonight. Other than sex."
"Dinner on the deck," he began, and she nodded her approval. "Then there's ice cream in the freezer, and we can drink wine and play board games and have a quiet night in."
"Ugh! That sounds amazing," she sighed, clearly loving his plan. "I could use a nice night in with just you. Work was the worst today," she explained, telling him about inventory day and all of the stresses that created and the general annoyances that came with it. He willingly listened to her vent and couldn't help but take in her profile and just feel complete and utter...happiness.
"Hey, how does this look?" she asked, drawing him back to the rice.
"Perfect...just like you."
"Look at you! You're Mr. Smooth tonight!"
"Just tonight?" he teased, pouring in his parsley and cilantro mixture and telling her to let it come to a boil and then reduce to a simmer.
"You're pretty smooth most of the time…" she complimented, moving away from the stove and taking a chip and dipping it into the guacamole. "Hey! This is pretty good!"
"You sound like you doubt my talents," he replied in faux abhorrence, flipping the fish and moving to mix the mango salsa together.
"Only some of the time," she winked and dipped a chip for him, holding it up to his lips. He took it from her and chewed it, kissing her gently once he had swallowed.
"Hey...tomorrow...can we go to the beach? I want to get in some real beach time before the summer is over. And we can go on the boardwalk...check out the games and the food and the rides...what do you say?"
"I say any excuse to see you in that swimsuit again is a good one. It sounds like fun."
Before the summer was over...maybe he could ask her then? Tomorrow at the beach?
His heart leapt up into his throat again at the thought.
What if she said no...what if he made a complete ass of himself…
What if...what if she said yes?
He could do the time zone changes and the dinner dates over the computer and the phone calls...and he would.
She...she was worth it. It would be hard. He knew first hand how hard it would be, but he would do it. If it meant exploring this for real, he would do it in a heartbeat...because this? This felt real.
They felt like they could be real.
A/N:
Thank you as always to my AMAZING beta, Saucy Librarian. Love you to the moon and back! You help make this a fun process. And her Navy man has left, so we're back in full swing!
Plugs!
Tumblr: Find yo girl! I'm doing sneak peaks for this story (was a about that this week – lost track of time!) as well as contests for some fun prizes!
Fic Rec: Your Lying Smile – Dawnrider. Pretty sure it's just on AO3, but it's a delicious Inu/Kag fic that I devoured. Excellent romance…amongst other things ;)
Next chapter should go up Friday, January 24th!
Until then!
-Lemon Lush
UPDATE: Temporarily on Hiatus
Hi all!
I said this on tumblr and forgot to then update this AN. Sorry! Really though...if you want "up to the minute" current information, you should follow me on tumblr ;) .
I'm doing this to lighten Saucy's load, because now I'm working on two stories (one of which has been nominated for best AU over at Feudal Connection), and that's just a LOT for one person to handle. It's a lot for me to handle too!
We're going to hold off on continuing on Dog Tags until voting is over, which means that the next update is V Day at this moment. I'm going to take her temperature closer to it to see if she feels like she can get it done.
After that, Dog Tags is going to switch to being updated every other week.
I made the call, NOT Saucy. I do want to emphasize that.
Chapters for A Heart's Abduction are about 5 pages a pop. Chapters for Dog Tags have crept up to being close to 20 at times. It's a lot for a person to edit anywhere from 15-30 pages each week, and I also need time to produce material so we can continue to have a consistent posting schedule (because I know we all love that, me included and doing 15-30 of writing is also rough and hasn't been happening).
I swear that this story isn't going to be abandoned though guys! I enjoy working on it and creating something with and for Saucy, so I promise this is just a brief hiatus!
Thanks for understanding guys, and I promise I'll keep everyone updated when or if there is ever anything worth updated.
We love you all!
A/Rs:
iPod reader: He is definitely the "dom" in the bedroom so far! It's been a lot of fun playing with that so far too. Thanks so much for your awesome review, and I hope you enjoy this next chapter!
Lola1991: Right? He needed to take his mind off of some things ;). Thanks for leaving the story a little love, and I hope you enjoy the next chapter!
Monika: I love that you binge read this! Yes! I'm absolutely trying to use tubmlr more! It's just so fun, and I'm so glad you found it! The end of the summer is coming…I promise! I just have a little more to go and then it will be here! As for Kikyo's plan…all in time ;) Thank you for the amazing review, and I hope you enjoy this newest chapter!
Guest: He really is isn't he! Don't worry…Kikyo will pop up again evetnaully. Hard to say when though ;). That part has been written though, so it is coming! And by all means…read it over and over! I won't stop you! Thank you SO much for your amazing review! We really appreciate the love, and I hope you enjoy the newst chapter!