Green light swirled to life in the middle of the vibrantly colored living room. Kit's heart seemed to slow down to the steady beat of the glowing lights. Just past the slim screen of magic he could see the foyer of the L.A. Institute, the depiction angel against the marble floor, the uncomfortable chairs, all of it familiar like a dream he had held onto for far too long. It sent an uncomfortable lurch in his stomach that had nothing to do with his usual uneasiness of portal travel.
He was going back..
Back to his home, back to the Blackthorns.
Ty didn't have the same reservations as he took a willing step forward while Kit found his feet dragging behind, weighed down by some invisible burden of past mistakes.
Ty hesitated when he reached the portal, turning his head to look back at Kit. "Your coming, right?"
Kit was hit with more nostalgia as he remembered a younger Ty standing next to a portal and asking for assurance that Kit wouldn't be left behind. It wasn't something that probably didn't need to be said, but as soon as it had been spoken out loud Kit was filled with a sudden doubt himself, and the overwhelming gratitude that someone wouldn't forget him.
That was the first time his heart clenched with a silent whisper that's said "never leave him, never leave him."
He was unprepared for the cascade of emotions that tumbled afterwards from remembering that, now that they knew they would both be better off if he did leave.
Magnus gaze flicked to Kit's and he knew what he must be thinking.
"Don't tell Jem and Tessa I'm back yet. I just..I need some time before I can see them again," he felt ashamed to even ask, but he didn't know how to face them and explain what he promised to do in Lyonesse, especially with everything happening with Ty.
Magnus frowned, his cat eyes shifted as he gave him a hard look. "It is a very cruel thing for you to do, to allow them another day of pain believing that you are dead," he said gravely.
Kit looked at Ty's hands that moved like butterflies at his side instead of meeting Magnus gaze. "I know that. I do, but if they find out they will come to see me, and I can't right now."
Magnus paused before finally agreeing, "I will let them know plans have changed regarding the ceremony."
Satisfied with the conversation, Ty started to head first into the portal and let it take him away.
Kit was gripped with the usual fears about Ty disappearing, but he couldn't stand there while Magnus judged him, and with a deep breath, headed to the one place he had sworn to himself he would never return to.
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They hit the marble hard, Kit bumping right into Ty, who was trying to right himself. Familiar black and white marble depicting the Angel Raziel sprawled before them in the dark light of the Institute. The foyer was completely empty, but that didn't last very long as people came sprinting out their rooms and the large staircase to see who it was.
Kit saw as Blackthorns stopped short and stared in astonishment, Kit himself was surprised at how much they had all changed and yet stayed the same.
Mark breathed his little brother's name at almost the same time that Julian started jumping several steps at a time as he bounded down the steps for them. Emma followed his lead while muttering swears under her breath with tears streaming down her face.
Jullian grabbed up his little brother in a tight hug, bearing his face into his shoulder. Emma hit next, startling Kit by grabbing him by the collar and pulling him in. Then it was Mark and Cristina trapping Ty against them, who was starting to look increasingly more claustrophobic against them.
"Ty! You're alright! You're alright.." Julian muttered before, " you are alright, aren't you?" he remembered himself, pulling away to get a better look at Ty.
Mark paused for Ty's consent before taking his hand and pulling his arm to his chest as he leaned into his little brother to be forehead to forehead.
Ty leaned forward and closed his eyes, accepting the affection while Emma ruffled Kit's hair and called him a 'hooligan'.
He was already too shocked to react to being pulled into this family reunion when he saw a determined and angry looking Jace storm down the guest wing and making his way right for Kit.
Instinctively, Kit tried to duck out of Emma's arm to get out of the way, but the woman's arm was made out of titanium steel or something.
But when Jace finally got to him, he simply reached in and wrenched him free somehow just to throw him into his own crushing hug.
"You reckless kid." He said in utter relief.
"Jace, your smothering me, let go." He choked out, trying to free himself.
"Not until I crush your bones with my pain so you understand what you put us through."
Kit didn't have time to shake off Jace or the unexpectedness of a warm welcome when someone finally pushed their way over. He didn't so much as see her there as much as he felt her presence behind him.
Jace finally let him go as he struggled to turn around and see Dru staring angrily back at him and Ty.
She had her hands on her hips and angry tears in her eyes.
"I...you two.." She looked over at Ty and her voice broke, throwing her arms around him.
Ty was really doing his best trying to comfort his siblings by letting them pull him into hugs.
Ty enveloped his arms around his sister and gave her a quick squeeze before rapidly detangling her arms, but keeping her hands in his.
"It's okay," Kit could hear him reassuring his sister.
Julian's eyes finally fell on him, keeping them locked there with a blank expression for an uncomfortably long time.
Kit's brain started to panic as he tried to remember if he did anything that made Julian not approve of him, then remembered how he left Ty without explanation and started to go into full panic mode.
But just as Kit was about to open his mouth and say something stupid, Julian broke into a wide smile. What was even more strange was that Kit had seen Julian put on an act for people before, he had an excellent poker face, but this wasn't one of them. This was a genuine smile.
Mark moved to place a meaningful hand on Kit's shoulder. His mismatched eyes searched him.
"I hope you are not here just to repay my brother."
Before Kit could ask what he meant, another scene started to unfurl past them near the stairs.
The area started to thin out as everyone started to give them some space. Ty let the hands of his sister drop as he caught sight of a boy still standing at the foot of the stairs.
Kit realized that the young boy still wearing a beanie in his pajamas, must be Tavvy.
"Tavvy, you've gotten taller," Ty said in surprise, like it was the first thing that hit him when he saw him. Kit wouldn't be surprised, Tavvy had to be only ten or eleven, but he already looked like a thirteen year old.
Tavvy's face screwed up in a desperate attempt to stop himself from crying before giving up and rushing over to Ty, grabbing him by the waist.
Ty looked around bewildered at everyone who stared back with affection. Awkwardly, he placed his hand on Tavvy's head as he let out a loud sob.
It was a perfect movie ending, even Kit started to look around before remembering that Tessa and Jem wouldn't be here.
He stifled the brief flash of disappointment by reminding himself he would only be bringing them more trouble.
He couldn't feel too alone though as Jace gripped his shoulders almost protectively.
"You know I'm dragging you back to N.Y. to prove to everyone that you are actually alive, and I didn't have a melt down from stress and grief."
Kit was still reeling from the fact that everyone seemed glad to see him that he asked, "What, people missed me?" He tried to play it off sarcastically, but didn't quite get the edge right.
"Just because Clary pretends she's had enough of Herondales because of me, doesn't mean she actually wants us to go extinct. But, I'll admit, I think it's mostly Simon that misses you. He's pretty depressed that the two of you can't gang up on me anymore."
Kit nodded as a smile started to slide into place. "I thought we might give you a handicap next time. You know, to keep it interesting."
Helen and Aline stumbled into the scene late.
"What's happening? What's wrong?" Helen asked in alarm, while she spilled down the staircase with Aline.
"It's four in the morning, people! Do you guys have a death wish?" She shouted, her eyes almost blurred shut from sleep until she caught sight of Ty, her eyes were wide awake when she grabbed Helen's arm.
"Helen, Helen!" She shook her wife slightly to get her attention.
She clasped a hand to her mouth when she saw her brother.
"Hello, Helen, Aline," Ty acknowledged.
"By the Angel, Ty!" She shouted, sprinting over to her brother.
Aline's surprise turned into irritation as she wagged her finger at him. "Don't you 'hello' us! You were gone for a year! A year, Tiberius!"
A few new faces were starting to peek their heads around the corner to get a look at what was going on. Kit wasn't surprised they had woken everyone up, what he was surprised about was that there were people to be woken up besides the Blackthorns.
A man with a mad look of curiosity on his face, took a few steps into the foyer.
Kit noticed the scar that ran along his jawline, and could have sworn he had seen him before.
"Jude Aldertree," Ty recognized, immediately setting Kit back that little office room in the subway station where he had met him, and how hard he had bashed the man's skull into the concrete.
Kit was about to make his way over to Ty, when Ty had another realization.
"Are there other people from Thule here as well?" He spun around and asked.
Everyone was deadly quiet, and with his own sinking realization and Kit knew why.
Julian pushed his way to his little brother and very calmly said, "Livvy is here, but she hasn't been herself." He started, but Ty was already bounding down the hall with purpose before he could continue.
Julian, gave a meaningful look to Emma who immediately started whispering for the others to let them go.
But Dru was already running after them, and Kit followed on her heels, vaguely wondering if anyone would try to stop him.
Jace let him slip easily way when he started to pull away from him. He kept his eyes in front, avoiding meeting anyone's eyes, but was still surprised when he was met with no resistance, even from Emma.
Somehow Ty knew where to find Livvy as if propelled by some connection. They looped down the hall where the infirmary was. Ty yanked the door and they quickly filled in after him.
Julian froze at the entry, holding his arms out to stop him and Dru.
There were the usual medical supplies you could expect from an infirmary, with medicine cabinets and metal tables with sterile equipment. The same infirmary Kit remembered except it looked well used with medicine being left out and unmade beds that looked like people had just gotten up from.
Livvy was sitting in one of those beds with the covers pulled up to her waist with her arms slung around her brother's neck. It was shocking to see how much older she was then the transparent ghost she became in this world. She was taller, her face more angled, and scars ran down her face.
Her eyes were wide open and shining brightly as a tear rolled down her face.
"I'm back Ty, I'm back," She said in wonderment.
"It's you isn't it? I knew it was you," Ty's voice shook.
Kit was hit by the words and felt his reality cracking as the situation sunk in. He was completely certain beyond reason that this was their Livvy talking in the Livvy from Thule's body.
Julian could also tell that something was wrong. "Ty? Livvy? What's wrong?"
Ty gently pulled away from his sister who shared in his guilty look they gave their brother.
Dru was too stunned to speak, and everything in Kit's head spun, another hourglass tipped on it's head.
The entire room paused with hesitancy, and waited.
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Jaime made his way as the sun was setting at Old Town Pasadena where the Los Angeles Shadow Market was held. He didn't get far into the market before realizing something was off.
He wasn't an expert in Shadow Markets but he had been to the one in NY and Mexico City a few times, and none of them felt this off before.
The dazzling colors and flamboyant displays of magic and wonder that usually swept the place to draw attention and sell their goods was almost non existent. The vendors all seemed subdued, limiting their space to behind the stalls as they hungirly watched the few patrons quietly stalk their wares. The werewolves and vampires looked agitated while the Faeries fluttered behind their floral pavilions casting reproachful gazes as people scuttled past.
Not only did Jaime find it bizarre, but a cold chill ran down his spine as he entered the market warning him of danger.
He didn't waste any time darting over to the vined pavillion before anyone really noticed his presence. The tent had layers of curtains and fabric to give it the illusion of a large tent with many rooms. He ducked under the first curtain to find himself in a room covered with a rich red material. Beneath his feet was an intricately woven carpet that when Jaime looked at it through his peripheral vision he could see the material move and come to life. There was a single small table with a bowl made out of a crystal material that held a clear liquid.
Standing there staring at him with a stony expression was a single Peri. She was only as tall as a child but her features made her unmistakenly a woman. She was beautiful with lush full lips and a heart shaped face, and her skin glimmered with a variety of colors.
"I need your services," Jaime said bluntly.
Her lips curled into a sneer. "That is no way to proposition a lady, even if you do intend to pay for her. I suppose you will be expecting half price because of good looks and my Faerie blood."
"Wait, really?" He asked, dumbfounded, before remembering himself and hastily waving away her suggestion. "No, that's not what I meant, your magical services."
She tilted her head but her expression of mockery remained the same. "There is a changeling in the next room who could perform those services if your looking for a lover to wear a specific face."
"No, no! You know what I mean!" He waved a finger at her accusingly.
She pursed her lips and threw her head back pretending it was a stoic display of professionalism.
"State your business then, and be quick about it. Shadowhunters are no longer welcomed here." She warned.
"Oh, very brave of you then," Jaime said, sarcastically.
Her eyes narrowed. "Some of us remember what it's like to be refused services, and exempt from public places like they were vermin."
Jaime didn't have anything to say to that, and instead nodded. "I've been cursed, and it's getting worse. I need to know how to break it."
"I suppose others find you as charming as I do," she said without smiling.
Jaime was unamused, "I'll proudly have you know that I was drugged because of how charming some people find me, which is what lead to me pissing someone off so much that they cursed me." He said that, but he didn't know if Fiacha had really found him irresistable or just a new exotic plaything.
She held out a hand to take his arm.
He briefly debated if this was a good decision, after all the last time his arm was examined by a Faerie, she cursed him. Jaime glanced at the bowl as he extended his arm, for just the flash of a second he could have sworn he saw a dark figure rising at the bottom of the clear liquid. Her small fingers touched his skin to pull it closer, but almost as soon as she made contact with his skin did she yank her hand back as if she had been shocked.
"What is it?" He asked, anxiously.
"I see," she stared at his arm thoughtfully. "You are indeed infested with a curse, and a very malevolent one at that."
"How do I break it," Jaime spoke too eagerly, borderlining on aggressive.
She gave him a slightly affronted look but otherwise ignored him. "Curses like these are not broken with charms or spells. There is only one way to break it, and only you can find out what that is."
He swore in spanish at the non answer, and from the look she gave him he was pretty sure she understood it. "What about Pandemonium? Their symbol was the headed serpent eating its tail, wasn't it?" he pressed his fingers to his temples in frustration.
"The Club?" Her face broke into surprise. "There are a few dance clubs, and a few bars in their name."
"But it wasn't always, it was an occult society dabbling in some dangerous experiments," He pressed.
Her face darkened, along with her skin, changing from bright shimmering red and gold to somber blues. "That was a long time ago. From all that I have seen the remaining creditors have rebranded it for Downworlder use. If a secret society does exist, it is very well hidden."
That didn't convince him of anything, he couldn't be sure that the man he saw was a mundane but he knew without a doubt he was wearing their sigil. Why else would a club franchise be investing in the Cohort?
Jaime was about to complain about how that was actually no help, and he had wasted a trip down here when heard angry voices outside.
She looked at the tent where the figures were growing more visible as they drew nearer. "It would appear you are not very good at clinging to the shadows, Shadowhunter."
"What do you want as payment?" He asked quickly, hoping it wouldn't be anything he didn't have time to argue about.
She turned to look at him hard in the face, her eyes were a dull lifeless color unlike her skin but it caught his attention all the same. "Win," she said.
He wanted to ask what she meant, but he didn't have time, and instead answering her he bolted through the other side of the pavilion.
As he was greeted by the evening air again he caught a brief glimpse of black robes and pale white skin before he was forced to hit the ground by an invisible force. His head smacked hard against the concrete and knew nothing else.
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Muted screams roared in Ash's ears. No matter how desperately he wanted to speak a command and undo what he had wrought, he could not. His mouth was as tightly closed as it had been when he walked this path in the waking world. His body moved without his volition, puppertered by some unknown force. The edges around the Hall of the Disquieted blackened and blurred like charred parchment. The faces around him distorted and changed to become horrifically disfigured gaping mouths as he was forced to watch on.
Suddenly it was him that was standing above Elsif's body, with blood marring his hands and Phaesphoros at his side with scarlet painted stars. Desperately he fought to strain his head to turn and find Jace. Finally, he found him locked in the cage the prisoners had been stowed in. His blank stare and composed posture as he watched Ash hardened his heart.
No, not Jace, Janus.
Janus was who he became when he gave up trying to recover who he was, and the person Ash had always admired above anyone else.
Indistinguishable anger at himself, Janus, or his father surged through him, pumping like lead through his veins.
The lights went out in the room, and his skin started to tear and burn as his wings pierced through like a dark promise of swift vengeance. They curled above him spreading wider and wider until they expanded the hall, letting black feathers rain down on them all.
Something else dripped from his wings as well, a black liquid like ichor clung to his feathers hissing and scorching all that it touched around him.
The dream began to burn apart as flames erupted from the ichor around them and began tearing apart the memory. As the smoke rose and Ash's hatred began to simmer in favor of a fear that he may burn here along with everyone else, his eyes wildly sought Janus.
Maybe because of habit, or some last desperate hope that he would see concern there, but instead when he looked into the blank mirrors he stared at him with, Ash didn't see his own green eyes staring back.
He saw a flat stare as cold and black as a sharks.
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Ash's wings almost propelled him out of his bed in his panic. The black feathers clung to his skin from sweat while his wings were beating with anxiety. Ash wiped the sweat from his brow, and tried to steady himself. It was dark all around him, only the brightest of stars shined through his curtains. There was no one in the room with him, but he caught the sound of sharp whisper, his head turning to look for the culprit only to find the stairs leading to the Black Volume.
An involuntary shiver ran down his back as he imagined the book calling to him. He felt the closeness of it crawl under his skin, his eyes watched almost expecting it to spread it's magic to find him sitting there.
There was no intruder waiting to use him or shadowy figures threatening to take him, just himself.
And that was the worst thing of all.
He let Dru go when she had been right, throwing away his one chance at knowing anything else than this. Janus had betrayed him, and he betrayed Elsif, and himself.
It had been easy, maybe even necessary to be complacent when things were out of his control. But somewhere along the line he had surrendered it without any intention or plan to regain it.
What propelled him out of bed and to the door now wasn't fear of what he might become like in his dream, it was one intention only.
To take back what was his, and if he burned it all down, if he failed at everything else, then so be it.
Determination settled inside himself as he felt the door close behind the chamber of the place he chose to lay his head with his mistakes. He had made himself a promise when he came back, and if he had no one else who cared for him, then he had no obligation other than to himself.
His mind was set on what to do next and it wasn't long until the palace brought him to where he wanted to go.
The Scrying Glass of Faerie.
The room was empty, and no guard in sight at this hour as he climbed the steps to the dias.
The golden bowl glinted with the reflections of the crystals hanging above it like starlight swords.
As he gazed into the bowl, the large crystal that hung just above it dripped a single droplet that fell into the bowl and magically filled it.
Ash closed his mind to focus on one thing alone, Janus.
The water rippled, revealing a familiar blonde wearing a dark hooded robe. His image blew up, filling the bowl with it, and Ash leaned in closer in his eagerness.
He didn't recognize where he was, so he had to assume he must be in Idris.
"I want what I was promised. I delivered you the plans as you wanted, and I will enforce it if I'm able to act in my own self interest when the time comes," Janus was saying to someone Ash couldn't see.
Suddenly, another voice spoke and Ash was able to recognize him as he appeared at Janus shoulder. "Don't worry, Janus, I will more than happily take the cup in your place. Besides, I will work better with our comrades seeing as how I'm not a shell of their former enemy." Manuel said.
Someone started to speak, and the two of them turned to listen. But just as the voice spoke the water roiled and turned black, cutting away his connection to whatever they were scheming.
"No! Come back!" Ash demanded, slamming his hands on the plinth that held the bowl.
"Go back! Show me Janus, show me Jace!" He tried to command it.
Surprisingly, the water cleared, the inky blackness turned to dark clouds until it evaporated from the water completely. Janus was back, but it wasn't the Janus he had just seen in a dark hood with empty eyes.
He was smiling, and it reached his eyes, lighting him like gold.
Ash was drawn to the image only to realize this wasn't Janus at all but Jace, the one from this world, the one he had written to for years in his codex. His runes were still black and fresh on his skin, Ash could even hear him make a joke to someone, and laughing at their response.
He was completely whole, what was more, he was happy in a way he had never been with Ash. He pulled someone into a headlock, a blonde boy with flashing blue eyes, and with a jolt Ash recognized him.
He was Dru's friend, Christopher Herondale, the Last Heir, and Jace wasn't just teasing him, he was hugging him.
They resembled each other so much that Ash was forced to remember that they were related. Jace almost clinged to him, keeping him in place and even though the boy looked annoyed, Ash detected with jealousy that the way Jace was keeping the younger Herondale to him was almost protective.
Because they were family, Ash thought bitterly.
A profound ache of loneliness caused him to dispel the image. He had always in the back of his mind wondered what Jace was like before Sebastian, especially after he met Dru. But now he had finally seen it for himself, and the bonds he had made that he couldn't make with Ash made him wish he could unsee it.
"Having trouble sleeping, my lord?"
Ash spun around, keeping his back to the plinth as if he was protecting his most hidden desires from being spied on.
"Nealon, what are you doing here?" Ash demanded in alarm. It was perhaps the last person he wanted to see tonight, Elsif's former brother in arms.
He wore light and flowing clothing and his dark hair was tied back with a jeweled ornament.
He had served with Elsif together as Seelie warriors outside the palace.
"I sensed your mind was troubled, I was curious," he answered quietly.
Ash felt himself on guard now. Nealon was part djinn, they were exceptionally rare and could see people's hearts and desires. He knew not all djinn were malevolent, most became that way because they are tricked into servitude inside enchanted objects and become resentful towards their 'masters'.
Still, he had always been terrified of revealing too much of himself, of displaying too much emotion. That was how people began to control you, how they used you for their own benefit.
"It is beyond your station to be concerning yourself with me," Ash said cooly.
Nealon didn't say anything at first but contemplated. Ash knew he had the tendency to be sparse with his words. He had almost a sleepy disposition and may wait to respond to a question until it pleased him.
"In truth, my mind is also uneasy," sorrow leaked into his words as he finally responded.
Ash felt the wind taken out of him. "It won't be for nothing, I can assure you of that," was all he said because he couldn't bare to elaborate any further on Elsif.
Nealon closed his eyes and slowly nodded his head. "He fulfilled his obligation to Faerie, perhaps by saving you." He opened his eyes, and suddenly his gaze was intense as he looked at Ash. "Or perhaps it was by finally showing you the truth of your situation."
Ash new then that he was seeing right through him to the heart of things, maybe even Elsif had been far more perceptive than he ever gave him credit for.
He turned his back to the other Faerie, in a vain attempt to shield himself. "I told you, you are acting beyond your station. Leave."
Nealon still sounded half asleep as he sighed, "I'm not done speaking to you, my prince," he said, in his continuing effort to defy him.
Ash drew himself up to his full height and strode down the dias to him. The anger on his face was only half falsified as attempted to persuade him to leave without resorting to his power, letting his presence do the rest of the work for him. "That wasn't a suggestion I gave you," he said, deadly quiet.
But Nealon was unaffected as Ash feared he was. "Do not let them turn you into a puppet king," he warned.
He was taken aback by this, his facade slipping and shoulders relaxed. "I won't."
He seemed pleased enough with that answer, "I just had to say my peace." He started to leave but curiosity got the better of Ash.
"Can you… Can you really grant wishes?" Ash asked him before he could leave.
Nealon paused, frowning. Ash was pretty sure he had just gravelly insulted him, after all djinn's were rare for a reason.
"I can, but I do not grant the few wishes I have to humans," he answered.
"Of course not," Ash clipped, letting a chill wash over his words. No one ever recognized him as equally Faerie or Shadowhunter, but seen as lacking. The only half people tended to ever see was the half they despised.
After a long moment, Ash was about to demand to know why he was still standing there in his irritation when he walked back over to him.
"But I will make an exception for you," he said suddenly.
"Why?" Ash was on edge at the sudden change of heart immediately.
He took another pause and deep breath before answering. "Because you could have easily forced me to give it to you as many with less capabilities have done to my kind in the past, and with less reason. Magic such as this works best when freely given, though not without its drawbacks."
"You would really give me a wish?" He asked in astonishment. It was true that he had not intended to force the wish from him, although a part of himself chastised himself for not taking the opportunity to do what he needed. But for whatever reason, he stayed his tongue.
"I will not grant it yet, because I can sense your heart is too conflicted to know what it wants yet." He cupped his hands together and when he opened them up a delicately woven ring laid in his palm.
Ash took the ring and slipped it onto his finger, admiring the magic that crafted it. Thin bands of gold wove around the black base, and in the middle there was a small cluster of dark jewels that looked like a constellation.
"You can see a small latch by the pattern of jewels," Nealon pointed out. "When you are ready to make your wish just flip the latch."
Ash stared at it, his heart was beating with possibilities, but Nealon was right, all magic came with a cost.
He knew that better than anyone.
"You have one wish, choose wisely."
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Livvy looked to her twin before tearfully telling Julian it was her, she was back.
Julian's face was heartbreak in itself as he swept his little sister in his arms, and for a moment he didn't ask any questions. But that couldn't last forever, the situation was too bizarre to not have questions.
And it was Ty that answered him. "I tried to resurrect her at Lake Lynn years ago, but it only brought back her spirit."
"With Kit, when we were all paying attention to other things." Julian said bleakely
Kit couldn't tell if he sounded remorseful or reproachful, but all he knew was that he wanted nothing more than to disappear into the wall he was leaning on.
"No, Kit tried to stop me," Ty corrected, allowing Kit to continue as a passive observer "But I did it anyway."
"Did you know too?" Julian asked Dru, and this time there was no mistaking the misery in his voice.
Dru looked timidly down at her feet. "Not until afterwards."
Julian looked back at Livvy. He looked confused and profoundly sad. It was a rare moment, Kit figured, that Julian didn't bother to put up any facades for his siblings. Maybe he couldn't right now, Kit could only imagine how exhausting and emotionally taxing it would be to regain two of his children he thought he had lost in one day.
Kit was having a difficult enough time trying to figure out his own emotions.
Julian looked completely miserable as he asked Ty, "but how did you do it without a Warlock to help you?"
Ty was hesitant to answer, and when he did speak it was Kit's direction he was looking. "We got the ingredients at the Shadow Market, the only hard part was finding a power source. I made a deal with a Warlock Athean Old in exchange for one, but it was corrupted."
The Old Man, Kit thought bitterly, he should have known. And he was certain that he had known the power source he gave Ty wouldn't work.
He thought back to that day and recalled how the Old Man always held a grudge. This wasn't an accident, it was to get back at him.
His hands shook, he should never have let Ty talk to him alone.
Anger blinded him as he thought of this, for a moment all he could think was getting his hands on him. He didn't get to kill Malcom for what he did to his father, but Kit didn't see a way Old could live if their paths ever crossed again.
his mind was caught up in regret and how much he wished he could run into him again and get his revenge for Ty, that he almost didn't hear Julian's next question.
"But is this going to last?" Julian asked.
"We don't know. Livvy's spirit has been like a vague imprint, I would estimate since Livvy from Thule came here. Her spirit must have been pulled to her body but since she is tied to me she couldn't fully occupy her body until we came back."
"So, when you leave she might be pulled out of her body again?" Dru looked reluctant to ask.
Livvy put a hand over her chest, as if to feel where her soul was residing. "I don't know, I feel...contained, almost whole."
"It might not be as easy once your soul has found another vessel to be extracted again," Ty concluded. He had a way of speaking that made him sound almost detached, except the way he hovered over his sister told a different story.
"Well that's good, because I have things to tell you," Dru said almost shyly.
Livvy beamed at her. "I know, me too. It's been so hard to watch you guys without being able to say anything."
Julian took his sister's hands. "I'm so sorry, to the both of you," he addressed both of the twins.
Dru made to stand closer to the bed to hug her sister and Kit decided now was the time to meld into the background and leave.
It was disgusting that he felt enormous dread at seeing her alive again. He hated himself, and he definitely didn't belong in this room with this family.
He slid out the doors without anyone taking notice, neither Dru or even Ty looked over as they fixated on Livvy.
Kit was a sinking ship as he laboured down the hallway, trying not to sink to his knees by everything trying to pull him down.
He should probably be happy Livvy was back, he did promise her that they were friends. But all he could hear in his head was Magnus words, 'Life isn't fair, and neither is death,'.
He watched Ty hold his sister to him and thought of how absolute Ty had sounded when he argued necromancy could be reversed, he could fix the mistake.
But there wouldn't be any fixing this, Kit could never ask him that. But that didn't mean everything wasn't so wrong. And if there really wasn't any chance they could fix this, then Kit was only here to prolong the moment he would have to leave forever.
Another taste of what he had lost, just a new memory to haunt him.
Livvy was wrong, she would have to be the one to stay with Ty, not him.
Blindly, he opened a random door to throw himself into. He had somehow instinctively navigated himself to the weapons room, he almost expected to find Jace marveling over some sword but was surprised to find another familiar figure examining a pair of japanese sais displayed on the wall.
She turned at the sound of the door opening, and Kit knew he missed his opportunity to avoid another awkward encounter that he wasn't at all prepared for.
Mia almost dropped the weapon she had in surprise, clapping her hand to her mouth. "Kit," she breathed.
Kit tried to smile. "I heard you guys all thought we were dead, well surprise. Sorry if that ruins any of your plans for today," he said lamely.
She brought up her hand to wipe the streaks running down her face, Kit was alarmed to notice she was crying.
He didn't deserve that, not from Mia.
He couldn't ignore the guilt anymore for how he had treated her, a distraction he forgot about when he couldn't trick himself anymore. He had lead her own and hadn't even been brave enough to be honest with her, and now he disappeared and during that entire time he was worrying about Dru and Ty and anyone other then Mia while she was here crying for him.
"You and Ty are okay then? Really okay?" She asked, coming to stand a few feet closer to him but stopped herself just short of reaching him. "I just...I can't believe your back,"
Kit swallowed, trying to force himself to act like hearing Ty's name wasn't another cement block being tied to drag him down. "Yeah, he's with Dru and his family right now."
A question flickered across her face, probably wondering why he wasn't with Jace then, but she didn't mention it. "You don't look like everything is okay," She said gently.
"When did you come back to L.A.?" He asked to avoid the question.
She let out aloud sniff before laughing. "You come in here like it's no big deal that you were missing for over a year and the first thing you ask me is when I did I come back from L.A.?"
It was too strange for to just act like he was a big revelation when to him it hadn't been that long since he had last seen her. "That's just the job sometimes, I guess," he offered half heartedly. Everything was weighing to heavily on him to really feel presence, but he didn't have the heart to just brush her off like he always did.
Her eyes drifted to the floor as she smiled wistfully. "That's just like you, always acting like nothing really mattered."
The affection in her voice made his throat tighten.
She seemed to sense and brought herself back to his question. "It was when Dru came back from Faerie. As soon as we heard, and with everything going on, me and Mason left the Academy to join the Conclave here."
"Yeah, that sounds about right…." He trailed of trying to think of what he should say when he noticed a new rune that was very noticeable in the flowing short sleeves of the blue blouse she was wearing.. The parabatai mark shone brightly even in the dim room of the training room like it was her own personal brightness she carried with her now.
"I think congratulations are in order?" He motioned towards her mark.
She noticed and smiled, "It was the best decision of my life, I'm surprised I didn't make it earlier. It's funny I never even thought about us in that way, but when it came up I knew what we were supposed to be."
'I don't think that's what we're supposed to be.'
Kit remembered Livvy saying that, and she was right because he had already fallen for Ty, but he wasn't supposed to be her parabatai either, and he couldn't be Ty's. He remembered thinking that the twins were such a perfect unit, never needing anyone else. He guessed that would probably still be true.
"I always thought it would be cool to have one, but I guess I never stayed in one place long enough," he tried to shrug it off.
"I guess that means congratulations aren't in order for you and Ty yet?" She teased but the smile fell off her face at his expression. "I'm kidding, Kit, I was only teasing." She put a light hand on his arm, "I know about you two, it's okay, I promise."
"You know?" He asked, surprised.
She nodded shyly, "me and Mason had our suspicions."
An awkward silence followed. He wasn't sure how to talk about this with someone who wasn't Jaime, and that was only because Jaime would have kicked the shit out of him until he was honest.
Part of him was relieved she knew, that she understood that it wasn't her fault but at the same time it just meant she also knew how badly he had treated her while he was chasing after someone else.
"I'm really sorry, Mia, I really am. I didn't mean for things to happen like they did, I wasn't trying to hurt you."
She shifted her gaze to the floor. "It really is okay, I knew by the look on your face back then that you didn't expect Ty to come back, and whatever happened must have been really painful. I just wasn't smart enough to take the hint..."
Kit shook his head, placing a hand on her shoulder. "No, none of it was your fault, and just because I wasn't trying to hurt you doesn't mean that what I did was right either." He told her.
She looked up at him then, looking him straight in the eye, she took a deep breath and said, "You're right. You did hurt me, and you should have been upfront with me about what was going on instead of pretending like everything was fine." There was a small smile on her lips after she finished. "That actually felt pretty good to say," she laughed off her embarrassment.
Kit smiled, "I actually feel a lot better now that you've told me off."
"Really"
"Yes, and I really am sorry," He said again.
This time she gave him a measured look before cracking into another smile. "Apology accepted."
"You know, I feel a bit better having talked to you, thanks Mia. " Kit admitted, going to sit on one of the benches. At least he felt he could put one thing behind him, and he would be pretty glad if Mia would still continue to be his friend after all this.
"Are things not working out for you and Ty?" She asked, and sounded genuinely concerned, joining him on the bench.
He was too tired to have this conversation, really, but he owed it to her not to brush her off, especially seeing how as she thought he had been dead.
"I can't really explain it anymore then things are complicated. I honestly had no idea when I decided to become a Shadowhunter that that would mean everything from now own would be infinitely more complicated because, Shadowhunters. They should start putting that in fine print on the Mortal Cup."
Mia frowned in confusion. "Right, I don't really get all that. Most of it sounds like a rant about something else, but I would argue all relationships are complicated."
"Not like this," he lamented. Despite just having said he was feeling better, now that they were on the topic, he wasn't sure how much of this conversation he could continue.
"If it helps, think about all the other complicated Shadowhunter relationships around you that worked out despite everything," she said thoughtfully.
He understood what she was trying to say. Jace and Clary thought they were siblings and everytime things started to settle down for them, for a while something else would just try to tear them apart. Alec and Magnus were the first Shadowhunter and Downworlder couple to be officially married by the Clave, and Emma and Julian were parabatai before they became giants and almost died.
But he and Ty weren't some great heroes, or two people destined to be together. They stumbled into each other, made mistakes and now they were going to pay for them. This wasn't some fantasy romance, they were just Kit and Ty. Even though he believed Ty could do anything, he knew that he himself couldn't save either of them.
"But unlike those people, I'm pretty sure everyone I meet ends up worse off for it." He sighed, getting up to leave, making his way to the door so he could find some other room to crawl into, and this time hopefully be alone.
He turned to tell her goodbye when she smiled up at him from the bench, her fingers weaving through her brown hair. "I wouldn't be so sure about that."
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His vision was hazy, fading in and out of focus, his head was pounding, and his wrists were bound tightly behind the chair he was sitting in. All in all, the makings for a pretty good Tuesday, if instead of being tied up in some warlocks tent in a shady Shadow market he was downtown in one of the back rooms of the Thirst with a girl with pink highlights that goes by the name Hot Kink.
He decidedly liked this scenario less.
His surroundings were a misty purple, not helped by the amount of incense burning in the air, fogging his brain and the smoke swirling the images in his head as he tried to focus.
Slowly, he was able to lift his head, ignoring its aching protests as his vision adjusted to the room around him. It was definitely a Warlock's tent. Magical items were on sale from gem stones to tonics. An alchemy station in the corner was even brewing a potion.
Practically hanging out of his chair and slumped over, the first person he saw was a warlock standing just below his eye level. He must have measured no taller than three feet, and with white scales and yellow eyes, Jaime couldn't imagine he's had an easy time blending in with mundane society.
To his left was a tall, thin old man, hunched over as he took stock of the wares.
"I won't welcome you to my Shadow Market, Shadowhunter, seeing as how you've trespassed," the Warlock crossed his arms and said as Jaime roused.
"Last I checked Shadowhunters had a right to investigate any premises that may be breaking Covenant law, and if I'm remembering the Los Angeles Shadow market has a habit of of it." Jaime said through gritted teeth, his head still throbbing.
His yellow eyes narrowed at his answer. "So that is why you're here? To see what you can dig up on Downworlders for your little Clave?"
"No, but I'm beginning to think that maybe I should, seeing as how bizarre everyone is being, and how the owner apparently likes to ambush and tie up Shadowhunters." Jaime regretted the sincerity of that train of thought as the familiar sharp throbbing in his arm began.
He pointed a scaly finger at him, "This is why I am done tolerating Shadowhunters in my market. It would be easy enough for you to mind your own business and let us take care of our own, but it appears that is beyond comprehension for the Los Angeles Shadowhunters."
"I'm not even from the Enclave here, I'm just staying at the Institute. Whatever grudge you've got has nothing to do with me," Jaime angrily said.
He looked over at his friend who gave him the same amused look back that really irritated Jaime.
"If you are a friend of the Institute you must be a friend of the Blackthorns, in which case I will show you the same kindness I have extended for them." He raised his hand and a green light swirled into existence, pulling in the darkness around them until it had a black center.
The old man turned to watch with amusement, there was hatred that flashed in his eyes before it left when he looked at Jaime's face
Jaime tried to break free of the bind but the magic wouldn't budge.
The man moved more swiftly then Jaime would have thought he could to stand in front of the Warlock.
"Hold," he demanded holding up his hand. "What's your name, boy?"
"What's yours, Rip Van Wrinkle?" Jaime threw back, refusing to answer to being called 'boy'.
"Tsk," he spat in distaste, reaching out and grabbing Jaime's wrists, breaking it from the binding.
He examined the family ring on his finger and threw his hand back. "I thought he looked familiar to a boy who bought a few poisoned cross bolts from Rook a few years ago." He said.
Jaime recognized he must be talking about his brother and Kit's father.
He looked back at the Warlock and said, "his brother is a Centurion."
The spell disappeared from his hand as he looked at Jaime in distaste. "It looks like you're more trouble then your worth, Shadowhunter."
Jaime gave a wide grin, "I could have told you that." His grin turned sour when he remembered what he had said of extending the same kindness he had to the Blackthorns. "What have you got against the Blackthorns?"
He held out two fingers, "Mostly, just the two. I would add the strange one's twin to the list but I hear she has already kicked the bucket, along with Rook which leaves me with one less pain in my side."
White rage flashed over Jaime. If he wasn't bound in this chair he would have struck him. "Why don't you tell me your name so I can send them your regards when I leave, I'm sure they would love to hear from you," his voice dripped with contempt.
His lips curled into a smirk. "I only tell those that I want to know my name."
Jaime opened his mouth like he was about to say something but instead flung his free arm across the table with the powders and potions, flinging it in his the Warlocks face.
Liquid, powders and alchemical instruments flew through the air hitting the surprised Warlock and giving Jaime cover.
His bindings broke instantly at the distraction. He bound towards the end of the tent where his weapons belt had been discarded and grabbed Durendal, slashing a hole through the tent, and broke into the evening air.
He made it outside the Shadow Market gate without incident, slowing down to a jog as he walked the streets of The Village. It was early evening, bright shades of pink were still visible past the horizon, the moon just starting to take shape in the sky. He slowed to a stop as something nagged at the back of his head. Wasn't it later than this when he came into the Market?
With a sinking feeling, Jaime flipped open his phone to see how long he had been knocked out for.
It was six o'clock the next day. He had missed the funeral, he had broken his promise to Dru.
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It was a long time until Ty was willing to leave Livvy's side. They had been talking for at least three hours, calling for the rest of their family to discuss what was going on.
It didn't slip Ty's notice that Kit had left early on, nor did it surprise him. Kit didn't stay somewhere when he was uncomfortable, and unfortunately Ty had learned that his family had a way of emphasizing his loneliness by just being in their presence.
It was painful, to feel like he was hurting him just by wanting to be with his family. Times like these was something Ty had agonized over in the past at how to reconcile with the two opposing desires of the people he loved.
Eventually, he came to accept that it was something that did not have an absolute answer, but one that took time to develop.
But it was harder now with what Magnus had warned them of. The idea that they were putting each other in peril by being near one another was so hard to comprehend to Ty because it contradicted every bit of evidence that he had come to believe in.
He was better with Kit, and together they could solve anything. They weren't supposed to be apart. He didn't know how to explain it, there was no scientific explanation or piece of evidence he could point to to prove this, but he knew it in his heart all the same.
Ty looked to the scars that lined his sisters face, the scars the other Livvy had gotten from her harsh life in Thule. He wondered if she was there, or if her soul had been kicked out as Ragnor had feared it might.
He didn't know what to expect from a soul attempting to settle in to a new host, if there was the possibility of rejection or going through shock like in organ donors. It was hard to leave her without knowing what could happen next to her.
He felt like he had failed her, he didn't know what to tell her, and if anything happened to her, he knew it would be his fault.
It was only after Dru's insistence that she needed to discuss things with Livvy alone that he was finally conceded to leaving the infirmary. He felt Livvy's anxiousness to speak with her sister again and discuss all the things she wished she could have told her before, and Ty couldn't refuse, just like he couldn't refuse Dru after worrying for so long over her and her safety.
He would have liked to talk to Dru as well about the way he had treated her in the past, but as usual he didn't know what he could say to her beyond the obvious declarations of how he missed her and was proud of her, so he chose to leave and say nothing.
When he left the room he let his back rest against the door for brief moment while he let go of a deep breath, his lungs pushing out air surprisingly shakily.
In part, a huge burden had been taken off of him, his family knew what he had done, and they didn't hate him. He no longer had to keep that a secret from those who mattered most.
But the one thing they couldn't know is how Ty and Kit would suffer for his mistake.
The intake of breath turned sharp, like swallowing shards of ice. The chill that ran through him made it almost impossible to breath.
He had been spared of keeping Livvy's secret but the future only seemed far more lonely than he could have predicted.
He moved down the hall, taking the stairs to where the bedrooms were looking for Kit. His first thought was to go to the room Kit had stayed in when he lived here, and wondered if Kit even remembered which room that was.
There were so many people here now, and with the situation becoming tenser, he didn't know if the room would even be available. As he passed strangers in his home he couldn't help but think that this too was his fault.
He started walking faster, propelled by sudden urgency to be near Kit. He needed to discuss what they would do next, he needed him to say they wouldn't give up, he just needed to be near him.
Ty found himself outside the door he was looking for and knocked.
He could hear the pausing of movement inside, the brief hesitation before the door cracked open.
Kit's blue eyes like a bright light in the darkness of his room greeted him.
"Ty," he breathed.
He heard his name like a revelation to things inside himself he had never known. Illogically he almost wished Kit would repeat it just so he could find out if his name would sound so thrilling, as evocative as the first time Kit had spoken it.
He pulled the door open wider to let Ty follow him inside. When he closed it behind them, it left them alone in the dark as he shut off the light from the hall.
Ty tried to say something, but he stumbled. The words felt strangled to say, instead he just reached for him.
He gripped his sleeve just above his elbow like Tavvy used to when begging Julian to stay, and he realized that was exactly what he was doing.
"I'm sorry," he choked out, even though there was much more he wanted to express.
Carefully, Kit's hands slipped under Ty's elbows to hold his arms. "I know," he answered in a husky voice.
He had to conclude that the conversation was just as hard on him, and it gave him strength to know that. "But there's time to fix it, I know there is," he tried and was dismayed when Kit started to pull away from him.
Ty felt like he had been thrown, his hands were still grasping for him even as he felt him slip away. He was at a loss of what to say if what he had just said had somehow been wrong.
"How could we fix it? As far as we know this has never happened before and neither of us has the resources to find out if it did before the wreath wilts."
Ty knew him well enough to sense the defeatist tone in his words but wasn't discouraged. "The Black Volume is somewhere, if we find it there might be something in there that will tell us how to reverse it..." He let his words die as soon as his mind caught up with them. Reversing the spell would mean letting Livvy die, and right now she wasn't just a spirit bound to live a hollow life tied to her twin, she was alive, she could feel and speak again. Her life had finally returned to her in the way Ty had always intended it to.
He couldn't just kill Livvy.
"That would mean reversing Livvy's resurrection, she would be gone for good this time," Kit voiced his thoughts out loud.
Ty paused trying to think through it. "There could be another way to break the curse."
"You know there isn't," Kit said softly, "you heard what Magnus said, a life for a life."
"But we can still try!" Ty bursted, daring to take another step towards Kit. "You said before that magic wouldn't change the way you feel, so don't let it."
Ty had seen the face he made enough times now to know what he had said was hurting him. He didn't want to hurt him, he wanted him to understand. He reached for him again but paused before touching him.
"It feels like you're asking me to sign your death," he whispered.
He inched closer until their chests were almost touching. "You're not. It's my choice and I'm choosing not to give up being with you," he whispered softly back.
Kit's arms came up around him, pulling him into himself.
Ty let out a sigh that seemed to voice every fear he held in himself, tightly winding himself around Kit.
"I still need you," he said in an exhale of breath. It was the only thing that he could say that matched every terror gripping him... That Kit would disappear one day, that he felt unsteady at the thought of trying to separate himself from him... with how right it felt to be beside him.
Kit pulled himself back and Ty turned his head to face him, their noses brushing against each other.
They both caught their breath at how close their lips were again.
Ty was still nervous about kissing after the first time, it had been exhilarating overwhelming and nerve wracking in a way that was hard to make sense of. Yet, when he found himself this close to Kit a powerful desire seemed to want to pull him closer, a hunger that maddenly told him would never be satisfied. But he could feel that every part of him wanted to try.
His eyes were locked on Kit's lips, how they parted just slightly, his tan skin and blonde hair that curled around his cheekbones.
Ty could see his pulse jump in his throat, he risked a glance at his eyes and saw how dark they had become, the light gone and replaced with something else.
He swallowed, tilting his head towards his, willing to bring their lips together if it could quell the hunger that was burning within him. "I still want this," he told him.
Kit leaned in, his hand slipped to his neck to wind his fingers in his hair, but just before their lips met. Kit suddenly pulled away, untangling himself from Ty.
"I can't, all of this… It'll all just hurt too much."
Ty was speechless, the fact that he had Kit just a few hours ago and now he was already giving up was upheaving all of his senses. He felt like a part of himself had just been ripped away, and he knew in no small way it had been.
He wouldn't beg him to stay, but it felt like a betrayal the he wouldn't even try for him after he had told him he loved him. It was hard to believe that what they felt for each other really was the same, and maybe it wasn't.
A cold anger washed over him. "I understood why you left before, because I had been wrong. I tried to understand why you refused to talk to me for years. I believed your reason when you told me, but I can't and I don't think I ever will understand walking away now when there is still a chance to change things."
Kit didn't answer at first, his mouth hanging open as he registered Ty's words. "Just because you want something to happen, Ty, doesn't mean it will," he finally said. "In case you forgot, I still have to go back to Lyonesse and become King? Then what, Ty? We never came up with a plan, and what about Livvy? That isn't her body she's in right now, the other Livvy is a different person, you can't just exchange them, you know that!"
"It might be too late for the other Livvy, we don't know that her body is holding two spirits at all," Ty argued.
"And if she is then you're killing her," Kit said firmly, "you're just rationalizing because you want your sister back."
Ty felt insulted, "yes, because it's rational. Judging the situation right now and acting on hypotheticals would be premature."
Kit shook his head. "It's the same thing your saying about the curse, and what you said about becoming King. You think you can do anything, but I'm not willing to risk your life on that, and you shouldn't be sacrificing Livvy's because of it either."
Blood pounded in Ty's ears. He couldn't understand how he could suggest he would just forfeit Livvy's life. Any version of Livvy was more important to him than himself, he had always done anything for her, he could scarcely breathe in her absence when she died knowing she needed him. He had thought he understood that. The way he spoke of him made it sound like he thought Ty was reckless, and uncaring, like he didn't know him at all.
How could he think of him like that?
He shook his head, trying to fight the tears stinging his eyes, before angrily looking back at him. So many choices of Kit's had been made out of fear, and he doubted this was any different. Ty heard his words again and detected what he must be afraid of. "You're upset because you don't think I'll break the curse like I promised, you don't trust me."
"I-" Kit started to argue before falling silent.
Ty waited for him to respond, glaring at the floor.
"Maybe I don't."
Ty's head snapped up, his previous anger vanishing in the anguish that caused him to reel back.
He felt the words hit him like a physical attack.
He had nothing to say back, his face stung from the tears he tried to hide, his arms fell limp at his side as his body lost the energy to fight.
He turned away from Kit and walked out the door.