It was 12:02 am.

Dio received a call from his beloved brother.

"JoJo, what the fuck is wrong with you don't you have any idea how noisy you are, it's midnight!" Dio whined at the phone. "Oh! Was now a bad time?" the bigger man innocently asked.

"YES."

"Well, I just wanna ask if you want to join Speedwagon's Iron Man tournament..."

"... YES."

...

Giorno grumbled as he covered his own face with his pillow.

...

"OF COURSE. JoJo, you know me. There is nothing I love more than making everyone else inferior to me. So, when is it gonna go down?" Dio asked.

"6 months."

"Is there anything else I need to know?"

"Uhh, yeah. As I mentioned earlier, our gym needs a senior and junior representative. So who could fill out the junior-" Jonathan was interrupted. "Giorno fucking can. What kind of question is that?" Dio boasted.

"Does he want to?"

"Yes. I am speaking on his behalf." the father sets down the phone to put it on loud speaker so he can cross his arms. "... I'll call him myself in the morning." Jonathan said.

"IT IS MORNING. WHY WAIT TIL SUNRISE, I CAN WAKE HIM UP RIGHT NOW!"

...

"GIORNOOooo!"

Jonathan went silent as he heard his brother's voice and loud footsteps fade. Jonathan stared at his phone with a perplexed expression as he heard a door slam.

"pa, can't this wait?"

"no! it fucking can't!" the blue haired man heard voices from the distance.

He heard footsteps getting louder.

...

Giorno groaned and rubbed his eyes. "Hello, uncle JoJo." he yawned.

"Hello, Giorno! Sorry about the inconvinience, I told your father this can wait but he was having none of it."

"Yeah yeah yeah, it's fine. Don't sweat it." Giorno said groggily.

"Alright! Would you like to join the iron man survival of the fittest tournament?"

"Yes yes, whatever you say, uncle." Giorno replied, half asleep.

"See?! We're going to smoke those fucking people." Dio declared as his son collapsed and banged his head on the edge of Dio's bed..

...

Jonathan smiled "Glad to hear! Goodnight you two." he hanged up and made his way to his and his fiancee's bedroom.

...

Dio stared at his son's unconcious body. 'What a surprise. He is actually making progress.' he noted, seeing Giorno's muscular outline from his pajamas. 'But he is still too unfit.' he picked up his son's ankle and dragged him towards Giorno's bedroom.

...

The morning came.

It was cloudy but fortunately it's not raining anymore.

Giorno slowly opened his eyes. It was quiet.

There's no sounds of raindrops hitting the ground. He immediately sat up "Finally."

He ran towards the bathroom and brushed his teeth.

Ate a bowl of peanut butter oatmeal.

Did 5 sets of 20 pushups and ran to the showers.

Dio merely stared at his kid. Giorno was wearing casual clothes.

Dio blocked the door "And where do you think you're going?"

"I'm gonna see Jolyne. I'll be back at... 2 pm?" Giorno said. Dio's mouth formed a smile "Okay, I'll allow you to skip gym today. On one condition."

"Hm? What would it be?"

"Bang her to outer space and cuck her boyfriend!" Dio yelled in a supportive tone. "P-Padre! That's inappropriate!"

"Well if you can't do that, head to the goddamn gym. We need to get you in shape for the tournament. Head there directly after banging your friend." Dio instructed as he made his way to the kitchen to make some coffee. "Of course I w- ait a minute." Giorno halted.

"Tournament?" he squeaked out.

"Yes. Remember like 6 hours ago, you agreed to join IRON MAN when your uncle JoJo called." Dio turned on the coffee maker. "N-No! I thought I was having a fever dream! I didn't agree on anything!" the young one defended. "Too fucking late. We're gonna enter as a duo! You're representing the gym as a junior! We're gonna show them why we're awesome!" the older one said.

"I... No! I only wanted to be in shape! I don't want to prove myself!" Giorno continued to whine. "Son. If one is born a male, there was a point in his life where he dreamed of becoming the strongest. This is the chance for that dream to come true!" Dio countered.

"Pa. I am a young adult. That is some grade school stuff! You're 36, why do you still wanna join that despite being old!" Giorno asked.

"Hey I'm not that old! I was 17 when I banged your mom for fuck's sake! And..." Dio drifted off.

"And?!" his son urged him to continue. Dio's phone notified him that he has a message.

"I just can't fucking stand it knowing that there are someone else stronger than me!" Dio said in frustration.

It lit a fire in Giorno, or so Dio thought.

"Well, I can. Goodluck." but before Giorno can leave...

"Bahaha! That fucking drag queen you hate so much was competing too! And guess what?! He is representing a Crossfit gym! Ahahaha!" Dio cackled at Jonathan's text message containing their fellow competitors.

It lit a fire in Giorno. The boy clenched his fists and tensed up.

He ran to his room.

Dio paid it no mind as he searched for the profiles of the other contestants on the list.

'Kars... You're going down.' the man thought bitterly.

Giorno wearing his gym artire leapt down the staircase and landed on his feet with a loud thud, startling his father "Fucking hel-"

"Kono Giorno Giovanna. Ni wa yume ga aru."

Dio's dumbfounded face turned in to a smile "Wryyyy!"

...

"-watching us all with the EYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE..."

"Padre-"

"OF THE TIGER!"

Giorno frowned as his father continued to headbang to that catchy workout music whilst driving.

"Can you explain the mechanics of the tournament?"

"Heh. You compete with some schmuck while the judges pick a random card on what feat of fitness you're gonna compete at. Who can finish a 1k meter dash faster, fucking arm wrestling, a fight... Manly shit!" Dio said as he tapped his fingers on the steering wheel. "So, we're not gonna focus on aesthetics anymore. We are gonna focus on functional strength! To make sure you can run, jump, and fight like a motherfucker!"

Giorno steeled his resolve. He cancelled hanging out with Jolyne for this. "I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm fucking ready." he growled.

"Okay, Spongebob." his father snarked.

...

Training montage.

"MOVE! COME ON! THINK OF IT AS HER SITTING ON YOUR FACE!" Dio screamed as Giorno benched 115 lbs. with greaty difficulty.

"MUDA MUDA!" Giorno roared as his arms were wavering.

..

"PICK IT UP AND STRAIGHTEN YOUR TRUNK! THINK OF IT AS THRUSTING YOUR HIPS TO HER PUSSAYYYYY!" Dio cheered as Giorno deadlifted 120 lbs.

"AAAAGGGHH!" Giorno grunted in pain.

..

"COME ON! FINISH IT OFF! HOW CAN YOU EXPECT TO LICK HER CUNT IF BROCCOLI DISGUSTS YOU?! REMEMBER, PUBIC HAIRS ARE WORSE!" Dio encouaged his son while Giorno chewed fucking broccoli.

Giorno fucking choked on his food.

...

After an incredibly grueling session, he just noticed that the gym was empty. "Come to think of it, where is everybody? HELLOOOO?" sounding like Ellis from Left 4 Dead, Giorno wondered around the empty place.

"They aren't allowed to use the facility." Dio muttered after stealing a BCAA powder from the shelf. Giorno turned to him in confusion.

"That loud German guy was a competitor. He represents Panzerkampf- Jesus... Panzerkamf- A german gym. My God, who invented those language, fuck... Also that dickhaired gay guy you're with. He's with my archnemesis." Dio clenched his fists.

"I see. So they are not allowed to use an opposing member's gym. To ensure that we train in secret, that they can't deduce our weakness..." Giorno pondered to himself.

"But why is Mista... Eh. Probably catched a cold." Giorno shrugged.

"Or probably because it's a wednesday. The 4th day in a week." Dio rolled his eyes.

...

"Guido Mista, huh? You seem quite interesting." the man chuckled. "Yeah so I hear you advertise performance improvement in 9 days? No I'm not talking about sex performance by the way." Mista whispered the last part. "But of course! Here in Oasis, we advanced performance enchancing... Supplements up to a hundred years! And by we, I meant me." Ciocolatta proudly boasted.

"Holy..." Mista ignored his statement as he saw a weird man in a brown gimp suit performing muscle ups on rings.

"I know, impressive isn't it? He only started gymnastics last Thursday!" Ciocolatta lied. But the fact that Secco was on juice was undeniably true.

"Amazing... I want in!" Mista grinned.

The monthly fee was 400 bucks but Mista ended up paying 500 because of reasons. The mad doctor think it was a generous tip, unaware of Mista's irrational fear.