In the brush on a rocky, moss-covered hillside outside of Marwood, in view of the tops of the roofs but out of sight of even the most watchful eyes, they waited for the raiders to arrive.
They'd set up a small camp on the hill, hidden behind a boulder. Days passed. Ash spent most of her time sitting on a patch of moss behind a tree that sprouted from the top of the boulder. Her eyes were glued to the village, watching tiny figures making their way to and fro as the days and nights came and went. She was not sure if she was only looking out for invaders, or if she was looking for something else. Reassurance that she was doing the right thing in dragging Drizzt back there, perhaps. He, on the other hand, seemed to share none of her misgivings.
She did not see Erith, or Kelle or Corin, for that matter. With each day she grew more worried that no one would come.
"Ash?"
She jumped. He'd appeared beside her without her noticing. She was accustomed to it by then, but that didn't keep her from jumping. Drizzt rubbed his eyes, and sat cross-legged on the moss. The sun was about to set, but he'd just awakened. He'd taken to sleeping in the afternoons so that he could keep watch at night.
"You are angry," he said, with no particular intonation-merely making an observation.
Ash realized she'd been scowling, and made an effort to relax the muscles in her face. "I'm not," she said.
He smiled, but didn't argue.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" she said. "I could go down alone and try to convince them to leave before danger arrives."
"Am I right in guessing they are not likely to listen to you?"
"I suppose."
"Will they try to fight?"
"Maybe, at first. They'll probably shoot a few arrows and then run as soon as they see that they're outmatched."
He nodded. "Then we will stay. They will need help."
She shook her head. "Why do you want to help them? After what they did?"
"If I do not take the opportunity to prove myself, how will I make them change their minds about me?"
"You don't need their approval."
The comment did not help the way she'd intended. He looked away, guilty. Guilty for being weak enough to need external validation. "I do not want everyone to hate me," he explained quietly.
"I know." She chewed the inside of her cheek. "But we could die. Both of us."
"Yes."
She watched him for any trace of indecision or fear. There was none.
"It is normal to be afraid," he said gently. "Appropriate, even."
"You aren't nervous," she said-it wasn't really a question.
"I am not afraid."
"Afraid and nervous are not the same thing."
"...what is nervous, then?"
She thought. "I get a feeling in my stomach. A sick feeling. A small, constant fear of what will happen if things go wrong."
He nodded slowly. "I am...nervous," he decided. "But I am also going to enjoy it. I always do."
"Killing people?" Ash said, raising an eyebrow.
"Fighting," he substituted. "Fighting when you know you are doing what is right."
She wanted to share his enthusiasm, but couldn't quite do it. Erith was right. This was ridiculous. "The two of us against a small army, then?"
"The two of us and Guen," he said, brightening.
"Three. Well, that's perfectly fine, then."
"I have faced worse. Have I told you about the time I fought a basilisk?"
She rolled her eyes. "Not the basilisk again."
He grinned. "Or, there was another time-"
"Maybe we won't have to fight them. Maybe we could just ask nicely if they would leave the village alone."
"That does not work very often, in my experience."
"What are we going to do, then?"
"It depends on how they attack. I do not know how humans fight. Do you think they will come together as a group, fast and aggressive, or stealthily in the night, from many places at once?"
"You're asking me? I don't know how anyone fights."
He shrugged. "If they are noisy and all in one place, they will be easier to track, but they will be stronger together. If they choose to separate, I will have no trouble picking them off one by one, especially if it is dark, but we will have more difficulty protecting all of the villagers at once."
"So we'll have to wait until we see them to decide how we fight them?"
"Yes."
She nodded uncertainly. "You can do that?"
He smiled crookedly. "Are you questioning a drow's ability to plan a battle?"
"No. I just meant… You'll tell me what I should do?"
The smile became less mocking and more reassuring. "Yes, Ash." He did not take the opportunity to question her courage or ask if she was sure that she wanted to go through with what they'd set out to do, which she appreciated.
She fidgeted. She was still thinking of something she'd been worrying about since he'd agreed to come along. She would never deny his help, but she knew that he brought at least one wild card along with him. They had no plan for what to do if he had another episode. They would have to hope it didn't happen.
Drizzt leaned back on the moss-covered rock and looked up at the sky. Ash wrapped her cloak around herself, warding against the slow chill of the oncoming night. They sat in silence for a while.
She took the opportunity to watch him, since his gaze was turned away from her and she could get away with staring. He always had the most contented expression when he was looking up at the stars. He was still glad to be here on the surface, despite everything. He was still entranced and delighted by all the great and small details of this world. No matter how many bad people he encountered, no matter what misfortunes they suffered, he searched for the things that made it all worth it, and he usually found them.
"Every night," Drizzt said, "you look at me, when you could be looking at the stars. Why is that?"
Ash stiffened. She hadn't been so subtle about her staring after all.
"I've seen the stars plenty of times," she said, deciding there was no point in denying it. "I would rather look at you."
"Why?"
She bit her lip, trying to decide whether she wanted to have this discussion now. But if not now, when?
"Drizzt," she began, slowly but decisively. He looked over at her, and smiled. He looked at her the same way he looked at the stars. She wondered what he was seeing. When she caught a look at her own reflection, she saw a directionless young woman, not particularly kind or beautiful, not especially happy or confident, not exceptionally attractive in any way. But when he looked at her, he was seeing something else. Something she didn't see.
"The other day, you kissed me," she said.
"Kissed?"
He didn't know the word. Ash looked away, amused and embarrassed.
"When you...put your mouth on mine…"
"Ah," he said. He looked up at the sky again, his face blank. "Kiss."
"What does kissing mean to drow?"
"It is an expression of...interest..."
"Interest?"
"Interest between...two people..." He glanced up at her nervously. "I do not know the common word for it."
His nerves were contagious. "I think it means the same on the surface," Ash said quickly, suddenly eager to alleviate his discomfort. After a moment, she scooted closer, so that she could look at him even though he was carefully avoiding her gaze. He relented when she approached, and met her eyes. "It can mean other things, too," Ash continued. "Mothers kiss their children on the forehead when they leave the house, or when they arrive home. Good friends might kiss each other on the cheek in greeting. It's an expression of love."
"Love?"
He didn't know that word either. Ash took a breath.
"When you care about someone more than you care about yourself. When...when the sight of that person fills you with happiness and comfort, and you miss them when they're gone."
He nodded in understanding. "Ssinssraka. That is how you say it in my language."
Ash gave a small laugh. "I am surprised there is a word for it in drow." She'd meant it as a joke, but she regretted it when Drizzt frowned at her.
"Did you think we do not know of it? Drow are people. Humans are not the only beings capable of emotion."
She cringed. "I know. I'm sorry. I didn't mean it that way."
His frown faded as he lowered his guard again. "It is uncommon, in drow cities," he said. "But not unheard of."
"Why is it uncommon, then?"
"Ssinssraka is not a positive word. It is a kind of sickness. Madness. It is a great vulnerability, caring that much about someone other than yourself. If one did fall into ssinssraka, they would be a fool to admit it."
"And what do you think about that?"
"I think that I am glad to be away from Menzoberranzan and on the surface instead, where I can at least have a small chance at finding someone I could freely express love to-however unlikely that may be."
"It's not that unlikely," Ash said. He looked at her curiously, and her face burned. "Why did you kiss me?" she said impatiently.
He hesitated for a long time. The question seemed to lose him. "Because...I wanted to," he said evasively. His brows pulled together slightly in worry. "I did not mean anything by it. I will not do it again."
"I want you to do it again," Ash said, hardly believing that he didn't understand that yet. And now that she'd said it aloud, there could be no taking it back, no more circling around the subject, no more hiding from what they both knew they both knew. She was very tense as she waited for him to respond, which took him a long time to do. He wore an expression that she could not read as happy nor displeased. He looked surprised more than anything. He seemed, for a long time, on the verge of saying something, but nothing came.
He sat up, watching her. "Should I...do it again, then? Right now?"
Ash gave a pathetic little shrug.
With an air of uncertainty, he leaned closer to her. He held her cheek in one hand, and brushed his lips against hers.
He leaned back again to look at her, as if still afraid he had overstepped some boundary. Ash quickly closed the distance between them again, grasped the front of his shirt to pull him closer, and kissed him. This time, neither of them pulled away.
All her trepidation drained away and was replaced with an overwhelming sense of trust. Her arm hooked around his neck and his hands wove into her hair, warm skin touching warm skin. It became suddenly effortless. The walls they'd been keeping up to protect themselves had blocked out the positive as well as the negative, and now that those walls were down, Ash felt a rush of unabashed affection and closeness, like nothing she'd felt with anyone else before. It felt right, and easy, and natural. They should have been doing this all along. Why had they been so careful about keeping their distance from each other?
He pulled away from her, just a little, checking if her reaction to this had been the same as his. Something passed between them, and they understood each other without speaking. She could tell he was thinking and feeling all the same things she was.
He began to lean in again, then stiffened. He was looking at something over her shoulder. Ash turned to look.
Not twenty strides away was a group of men in a familiar style of mismatched armor, staring at them with varying degrees of confusion and disapproval. They carried their swords in their hands. In any other circumstances, Drizzt would probably have noticed them long before they'd gotten this close. The men, realizing they'd been seen, recovered from their surprise and quickly approached, swords up.
Drizzt was suddenly on his feet, without Ash having noticed him moving. He stepped in front of her, swords already in his hands. A twirl of smoke appeared beside him, which solidified into the shape of a very large cat.
"Tell them to leave," Drizzt whispered to Ash.
She scrambled to her feet. The would-be raiders had halted at the appearance of the cat.
"We know why you're here," she said. "If you turn around now, we'll let you leave unharmed."
The men exchanged glances. One of them chuckled and looked up at Ash.
"We number almost a hundred," he said. "Do you plan to fight all of us?"
She tried not to let her shock show on her face. A hundred.
"I see only four of you right now," she said.
"And I see a frightened girl who already knows she's lost," the man replied. He gave a quick, decisive motion to the others, and they advanced.