Authors note: WARNING- Implied past sexual abuse. Nothing too graphic but the reference is clear, and some depictions could be intense. I do not go into detail about specifics.
As the weeks passed each day was marked by steady progress with only small setbacks. Most mornings when Bucky jerked awake it only took a few seconds of choked breath before he would let out a sigh of relief, trembling hand grabbing the warm palm Steve would place deliberately in the center of his bare chest with steady, grounding pressure. Bucky would squeeze twice, taking in shuddered gulps of air as his breathing slowly regulated, a signal that he was okay and in the present. Bucky's bright blue eyes would initial slam shut in an attempt to contain any tears his nightmares might have conjured but would blink open again once his breathing had slowed and he would turn his head to find Steve's steady gaze, a gentle, reassuring smile growing on the blond man's lips. In that moment he knew who he was, where and when even if he was still hunted by the horrors of his past, pain, guilt and fear ever present in the depths of his large blue eyes.
The Sergeant's days took on a flexible routine that involved working out, Psychotherapy, trying new foods, listening to music, learning about the new century and increased social interactions with the other Avengers. Even though he was quieter and more subdued then the James Buchannan Barnes of his youth, Bucky was still able to smile and add to conversations, finding his voice again after years muzzled by Hydra. He would offer smirks when Clint told jokes, roll his eyes when Stark made sarcastic quips and spoke candidly with medical staff even if he still carried some uneasy tension when being examined. Bucky's true self was finally shining through and it brought a renewed sense of optimism to the team. Steve felt overwhelmingly grateful, often staring at Bucky with a devoted fondness that made the Sergeant blush and shove him playfully or throw a pillow at his face as he teased Steve about being a sap.
Bucky was becoming more independent and enjoyed spending time on his own learning about the present day and the historical events that shaped society as well as the expansion of technical advancements and the various cultures around the world. Bucky had always loved music in the way that Steve was passionate about art and so he spent several hours of each day relaxing as he listened to different genera's of music and reading books about scientific discover and a variety of historical biographies, excitedly explaining new things he had learned when Steve returned to the medical suite in the evenings after spending most of the day away. Bucky's steady recovery afforded Steve time to resume some of his responsibilities as Captain America, attending SHEILD briefings, consulting military on covert missions and making public appearances for various charities.
The transformation was a relief to Steve and his teammates after months of Bucky relating to those around him through the filter of Hydra's programing and conditioned responses. However, there were still frequent bad days when it took longer for Bucky to remember himself, eyes dilated with fear and mistrust as he pressed himself against the wall after frantically diving out of bed. On those days Steve had to swallow down his own pain and disappointment, remaining calm as he was once more faced with the shattered and fragmented persona of the lost Soldier. He followed Sam's instructions and sat quietly on the bed, speaking with gentle tones as he explained to his desperately frightened friend who they each were, where they were and when until Bucky would edge closer, studying Steve's face with bewilderment and confusion. Sometimes it took only an hour or so before Bucky would actually speak, mumbled and half whispered, voice struggling to express his thoughts but still responsive. Steve stayed with him on those melancholy mornings, offering comfort until Bucky would ask to be alone for a while with the promise he would eat.
Then there were the days, less often but far worse, when the recovering POW would shut down completely and remain silent, unable to make eye contact as he withdrew into himself. The former Asset would isolate himself in his own room, behaving guarded and cautious throughout the day, avoiding the others and interacting with Steve only minimally. He would rewach every documentary featuring himself, Steve, the Howling Commandos, and his family with eyes large as he bit his lip, one hand gripping his hair the other one hugging a pillow to his chest as he rocked on his bed.
Steve's mood would be anxious and sullen throughout the day as he fought the urge to remain at Bucky's side, relying on Jarvis to monitor him instead. The Captain would try to keep himself distracted and occupied until he would finally get a text message from Jarvis stating that Sergeant Barnes had requested his presence. Steve always stopped whatever he was doing and jogged back to the medical suite with his own desperate need to comfort and relive Bucky's distress. Despite the emotional roller coaster, Steve would sigh in relief as soon as Bucky turned toward him and called out his name in a shaking and exhausted voice. The Captain would rush into Bucky's embrace, holding him as he listened to his friends quiet, muffled sobs. Once the tears subsided he would insist Bucky drink a protein shake followed by a shower or bath, helping Bucky wash himself with gentle caress and encouraging words before tucking him into bed always hesitating long enough to allow Bucky the choice of reaching out and pulling Steve to him. This was the one seemingly constant thing and despite the Psychiatric team's concern about consent vs compliance, Bucky always asked Steve to stay with him. Those days were difficult but always ended with Bucky curled up in his arms, protected and secure.
It was only at night in the safety of a shared bed that Steve would softly kiss Bucky's temple and hair line or would bring his scared knuckles up to his lips, a private display of affection they kept just to themselves. Steve never tried for anything more than that, letting Bucky take the lead if he wanted to explore their fragile, but familiar intimacy. They had exchanged more soft, gentle kisses and when Bucky would open his mouth and cling to Steve passionately moaning, the Captain made sure to keep his hips still and not grind his growing erection against him. Every time things began to heat up Bucky would break away with a shudder, painting and heart suddenly racing. excitement becoming anxiety that he didn't understand. He would start shaking and mumble apologies as Steve hushed him and held him tenderly, reminding him that he was safe. It made Steve nauseous with guilt and concern, afraid to find out why Bucky was having such an intense reaction to sexual arousal.
It was almost two months since Bucky had received the new prosthetic limb and he was doing objectively well despite a lingering unease that some traumas had yet to be fully remembered. On one late night after a relatively good day when Bucky had been socially engaging and had even gone on a run that morning with Steve and Sam in Central park, Bucky was taking the lead, the way he always had back in the days of their secret intimacy. He had his metal hand gripping the heme of Steve's shirt as his right flesh hand carded through the Captain's hair. He was kissing Steve deeply and moaning as he brought his own stiffening member forward, pressing against Steve's thigh. The blond man felt heat rush down his body as Bucky began rutting against him, sucking on Steve's neck and tongue exploring his Captain's ,mouth as he bit his bottom lip. Steve let out his own low, moan as he let the hand resting on Bucky's lower back slide down under the waist band of his lover's pajamas to grip Bucky's firm buttocks, squeezing as he pressed their bodies closer together, his own erection demanding attention. Bucky shivered and let out a choked gasp as he broke their kiss and bucked his hips forward in a frantic spasm as he suddenly orgasmed without warning. He was panting with eyes wide in shock as he stared down at the wet, sticky material covering his still hard cock. Steve, stroked the side of his face and guided his startled expression up to meet his own calm and loving eyes.
"It's okay,… it's okay Buck,…" Steve offered softly, bringing his hand up to stroke through his friends tangles of hair as Bucky took in a few more shuddered breaths, before his face crumbled and a sob broke through. He shook his head, metal hand coming up to cover his face as he pulled away from Steve, turning his back.
"Bucky,... Hey,… no,… it's okay, just breath pal." Steve tried to comfort as Bucky turned away and covered his crotch with his other hand, shoulders shaking as he curled in on himself, face hidden in his palm as he quietly gasped between choked sobs. Steve tried to wrap his distressed lover in his arms, calling his name but Bucky let out a panicked cry at Steve's touch and began pulling on his hair as he shook his head.
" Нет ... Пожалуйста ... Не надо!" (No…Please….Don't!) Bucky's desperate plea was broken with a shattered sob as he curled into a tight ball, as if he was trapped with no where to go. Steve recoiled instantly even before he heard Jarvis offer a translation. He withdrew himself from the bed, taking steps back as his own chest felt tight and he covered his mouth with his hand, shaking his head beneath shocked, tearful eyes, watching his best friend, the man he loved gripped in a heartbreaking flash back that Steve had triggered.
The Captain backed away until he was pressed against the wall and then let his knees buckle as he slid down until he was seated. Steve covered his own face in his palms with shuddered breaths as his mind raced with thoughts about what Bucky's sudden aversion meant, what horrific torment he had been subjected to that was in some gruesome way connected with the sensation of orgasm. Rumlow's sadistic taunts hunted his thoughts as he felt his gut cramp. What had they done to Bucky? What disgustingly cruel degradation had Hydra forced upon his best friend that made him recoil in fear and shame after his own sexual release?
There was no way of denying it now. Bucky was curled up on the bed shaking as he silently wept, reliving a traumatizing flashback that confirmed the nagging suspicion Steve had tried so desperately to ignore since the first video sent by Rum low over seven months ago. The Captain had known that Rumlow was very likely not the only sadistically perverted monster that lived in the shadows of Hydra, gleefully using their control and power to dominate and abuse a POW they had forced into slavery. Steve felt numb, as if the horrific truth was more then he could even begin to understand. He sat motionless for a few long moments as he worked to steady his own breathing, forcing himself to stay in the present and deal with the current situation at hand instead of allowing himself to become overwhelmed by this new disturbing realization.
The Captain wiped the tears from his own eyes as he let out a deep breath, willing himself to remain calm and focus on what was most important, comforting Bucky. He looked up just as he saw his friend begin to uncoil and sit up, facing away on the opposite side of the bed, shoulders slumped and still silently shaking. Steve pushed himself up and carefully walked around the bed, remaining out of arms reach as he circled to stand in front of the distraught former Asset. Bucky had his flesh hand still covering the wet spot on his plaid pajama pants, bare feet on the ground. His metal hand was griping the hair at the crown of his head painfully tight as he bit back shuddered breaths, head lowered to hid his tear streaked cheeks. Steve stood before him and let out his own heavy sigh before he slowly dropped to his knees, hands in clenched fists at his side.
"Bucky?... Are you with me pal?... You know where you are right now?" Steve asked trying to smooth his strained voice that was brimming with emotion. After a few more choked off breaths Bucky nodded, eyes still squeezed shut as he remained folded in on himself, bowing his head even further as if he was crippled with humiliation and overwhelming shame.
"Can I come closer to you Bucky?" Steve asked with a tone that shook despite his best efforts. Bucky let out a shuddered sigh as he tried to answer, unable to raise his head, eyes still squeezed tight.
"N..No,…Please,…I,…Please just….." Bucky's soft whisper broke and he let out a chocked sob shaking his head as he tugged harshly on his hair.
"Bucky,… Don't hurt your self…" Steve pleaded softly as he edged closer and reached out to stop the metal hand that was tangled in his friends brown locks.
"NO!... Don't touch me…don't!" Bucky shouted as he jerked away violently, shoving Steve back as he rolled away off the bed and pressed himself against the wall Steve had just sat by, their positions switched. He had his back to Steve, facing the wall as he continued to hid the evidence of his ejaculation, body shaking as he let out a few panicked breaths shaking his head back and forth as he once more pulled on his hair.
"Buck,… it's okay,… I won't…" Steve's voice was a desperate plea as he rose to his feet but he was cut off as Bucky quickly made a beeline for the bathroom, slamming the door shut and locking it. Steve took a few steps forward but resisted the urge to knock or force the door open when he heard the distinctive sound of his friend vomiting between anguished sobs.
"Bucky,… Please…" Steve begged as he pressed his forehead to the door, both palms on the frame.
"Go away,… I can't,… I just… Please!" Bucky sobbed before again dispelling the remaining contents of his nauseated stomach. Steve remained there for a few long minutes listening to the hitched breathing and heartbreaking cries of a man who had just relived a hell Steve didn't want to know but was desperate to save him from. After another moment of indecision Steve let out sigh of resignation.
"Okay Buck,… I'm gonna,… I'm just gonna go away for a bit,… Give you some space,…I…I'll be nearby so just,… Just when your ready tell Jarvis okay?... Just say my name,… You hear me Sergeant?" Steve tried to make his voice sound confident with authority, something Bucky seemed to respond to even when he was lost in the pain of a flashback or feeling emotionally volatile and absorbed in thought, fixated on some new traumatic memory that left him disoriented and unresponsive to those around him.
"GO AWAY!... Please,…please just go away!" Bucky's shattered cry felt like a punch and his muffled sobs left Steve cold inside. With heavy steps he backed away from the bathroom door and turned away, running a hand over his face as he stumbled out of the room and into the dimly lit medical suite. Without a sense of direction or purpose Steve walked numbly away from his shattered best friend, bare feet carrying him out the doorway and into the hall, vision blurred with unshed tears as his mind wandered in every direction and his gut clenched like his fists as Rumlow's vicious words replayed in his head.
….
Bucky was sick with disgust and paralyzed by an overpowering feeling of shame and fear that refused to dissipate even after his flashback had ended and he was back in the present. He pulled on his hair with both hands as he rocked on his knees, wrenching nothing but stomach acid into the toilet bowl. He remembered. He remembered, in graphic detail he remembered Hydra violating his body, using him in a way that stripped him of any remaining pride or dignity. Every time a handful of soldiers held him down, screaming and fighting as he wished for death or later when he was silent and compliant, letting whoever abuse him as he focused on following orders so he could return to cryostasis where he would be trapped in ice but free of their brutal, unrelenting touch. There degrading taunts, the smell of sweat and vodka, the pain and agony of being ripped apart and the taste of men he despised with every ounce of his tortured soul settled upon him like a filthy blanket that was suffocating him. Bucky knew what had happened, what he had let them do, what they had made him become, and he was completely disgusted with the feeling of his own skin, ashamed and horrified.
The sticky wetness between his thighs was a cruel, sick joke, reminding him that Hydra owned his body, his pain and his pleasure. He was their prisoner, their slave, designed to serve whatever purpose they deemed fit and he had no control over what they did and how they made his body respond. He was nothing but a broken, empty vessel for other people to fill with whatever they wanted and however they wanted. With another strangled cry Bucky ripped off his pajama pants, struggling to get away from the feeling and the smell of his release, a sickening and repulsive display of his bodies own willingness to let Hydra use him like their whore or as a cold blooded murder. The shame and guilt of his pathetic servitude was more than his battered pride and fledgling grip on identity could handle. He crawled into the shower stall and turned on the water as hot as it could go, curling in on himself as he cried, his mind trapped in the endless loop of his own self-hatred and feeling of immense shame.
…
Steve found himself in the gym, his numb, frozen feeling of shock and dismay had been replaced by a boiling sense of fury and lethal anger that needed an outlet. He was fighting an army of robots, combat drones Tony had designed for the team to spar with, using his bare hands to rip them apart as he screamed a guttural cry, seeing only red as Rumlow's words continue to repeat alongside the images of Bucky curled up on the bed and then cowering against the wall, shaking with sobs. He was consumed with violent rage and hatred, completely and totally lost in the physical act of destroying every single thing in his path as if he was slaughtering the sadistic creatures who dared to brutalize the man he loved more than life itself. The Captain was lost in the heat of blinding rage, unaware of anything or anyone else.
Sam hurried up to the doorway of the gym in sweatpants and a T-shirt, arriving the same time as Bruce who looked startle with apprehension, a medic bag in his hand. Just inside the room Natasha stood with Clint and Stark who was in his Ironman suite, face mask open. They all exchanged looks of serious concern with one another before focusing back on Captain America who was in the middle of the room, decimating combat drones with such force he resembled the Hulk. Steve was in torn sweatpants and nothing else, blood from his knuckles splattered on his bare chest and face as he screamed with cries of such ferocity his teammates were frozen in stunned silence.
"What happened?" Bruce asked with a bewildered tone, looking over at Tony with sudden alarm.
"Bucky?" He asked as if he was about to run to the medical suite.
"Jarvis said he's been in the shower for over an hour,… He's monitoring for any sign of physical threat or self-harm." Tony responded with a direct and serious tone not normally used.
"All we know is that Barnes had a flashback and wants to be left alone… Jarvis alerted us because Steve is the one bleeding at the moment." Natasha added with a calm expression, neutral but her attention never wavering from the Captain.
"He's been at this for a while, but Jay said he wasn't hurting himself until he split his knuckles open and won't stop." Stark sighed, his eyes tired from too many hours in his workshop but his jaw was set with ridged determination. "Suggestions?" He turned and looked at Sam who wiped his mouth and blew out a deep breath.
"Jarvis stop the combat exercise." Clint ordered as he crossed his arms and leaned back against the wall. "Don't approach him yet." The Archer stated and the others looked at him and then back toward Captain America who was straddling a robot as he tore through the machines hard ware with brutal force, growling like a predator.
The Avengers stood back and observed their Captain as he destroyed the robot, completely smashing it to pieces before he staggered to his feet, breathing hard and eyes wild as he spun around with his hands up ready to continue the fight. He was staring at his friends with a frenzied look of intent, as if he was ready to charge them but he froze and blinked hard, breath catching. He let out a forced deep breath and stood up strait wiping his hands over his face before stopping and looking down at his bloody, battered knuckles. The others watched him for a moment before Natasha approached slowly. Steve was staring at his hands, examining the damage as he panted harsh breaths. He looked up through sweat soaked bangs and his eyes were glistening with unshed tears as he choked out a broken sounding laugh, shaking his head.
"Steve?" The Widows spoke with a soft, unthreatening tone, cautiously remaining a few feet away but with body language that was open and offered support.
"Nat…" Steve answered, swallowing after another choked huff. He took a step toward her, then another before he stopped and his hands dropped heavily, shoulders sinking down as he looked down at the robots all around him. He shook his head again and gestured broadly to the heaps of machinery around him before looking back up at the Widow and then over toward his other teammates who were approaching slowly.
"What's wrong?" Natasha asked letting her concern show openly. Steve swallowed again and his brow creased as a pained look took over his dazed expression. He sighed and his steady breaths seemed to increase again as he shook his head looking from the red head and then to each of his advancing team mates before opening his mouth to speak. He tried to explain but he had no words, instead a choked growl of despair ripped through him and he turned away, fists clenched and raised as he shook them.
"Steve?... Don't swallow it down man,… Come on,… Don't carry this shit on your own!" Sam's voice was authoritative and refused to allow Steve to bottle up all the pain he was obviously experiencing. Steve let out more rapids huffs of air as he paced around the carnage of robots shaking his head as he gritted his teeth. With a forceful kick, a robot head flew across the room and shattered against the wall as he yelled out in anger and frustration, heartache and sorrow.
"Easy Cap!" Tony spoke as his face mask closed and he approached the raw and emotionally distraught super soldier with hands raised. Steve spun around and gasped for air as he backed away still shaking his head as he stumbled and fell back against the wall, tripping over robot limps as he dropped to his knees and then onto his butt.
The Captain felt like his lungs were gripped with asthma as he gasped and clutched at his chest, a cry of anguish and despair ripping through him as he banged the back of his head against the wall and looked up at his teammates with a shattered expression.
"They ruined everything!... They destroyed every good thing we had!... Hydra took it all away…The God Damn Bastards,… Those sick sons of bitches!... Sadistic, twisted, heartless..." Steve's words choked and tears spilled down his face as he shook his head pulling his his knees up.
"Oh God,...Oh God Bucky!... I'm sorry,… I am so sorry Buck!... What did they do!?... God what did those sick bastards do to you!?" Steve was whispering between anguished sobs, shaking his head as he wept for the loss of what was once a sacred intimacy he shared with Bucky, now tainted and destroyed by their enemies, like everything else Steve held dear.
They knew the meaning behind Steve's anguished words, the disturbing truth that they had privately each suspected after learning more about Hydra's ruthless victimization of Sergeant Barnes before his programing and even after, when he was their obedient Asset. There was no explicit documentation stating that Hydra had used rape as a means of domination and punishment or condoned the sexual abuse of the Winter Soldier for others gratification, but Rumlow had spelled out his own intentions and he was as much a representation of the evil, and sadistically cruel enjoyment that Hydra bread within their fanatical followers.
Natasha closed distance and knelt by Steve's side placing a hand on the Captain's shoulder as he shook and silently cried, face buried in his folder arms that rest on his knees. Sam was there too, crouching down directly in front of the Captain, speaking in calm, clear directives as Dr. Banner joined Steve on his other side.
"Steve,… Breath,… focus on taking slow, even breaths,…. Count them." Sam encouraged as Tony stepped out of his Ironman suite and Clint stared down at the mangled robots, stained by the Captain's bloody hands.
"I am gonna kill them Sam!... I am gonna kill every one of those lousy cowards!... Every one of em'!" Steve's Brooklyn accent was strong as anger still burned bright within his watery eyes, blood smeared on his face and in his hair. He took in harsh gulps of air as he closed his eyes and then locked his jaw breathing instead through his noise. He banged his head back against the wall again as he internally scolded himself for disclosing to the others what had been done to Bucky, for sharing the shameful truth that the Sergeant would have never wanted anyone else to know if he could have kept it a secret.
"I don't doubt that you will make Hydra pay for what they have done to both of you,… We already saw how Barnes dished out his payback on the US revenge tour… But for now, I need you to calm down,… lets focus on what happened tonight and how we can help it get better." Sam instructed with an even and reassuring tone as Banner opened his medic bag and handed cleansing wipes to Natasha who started cleaning the blood from Steve's hands.
The Captain opened his wet eyes and let out another shuddered sigh as he shook his head and watched them patch op his busted knuckles.
"I messed up again Sam,… You were right,… I should have insisted Bucky sleep in his own room, I should have put a stop to everything that's been going on but,… I,… God I've missed him so much and he wants to be close,… I never pushed anything on him I swear,… I let him set the pace… but still…." Steve banged his head against the wall again and Natasha cupped his neck to prevent him from repeating the action.
"Stop it!" She stated simply with a stern frown and he dropped his gaze back to his hands.
"Bucky had a Flashback?" Sam asked. Steve nodded as he looked up at Sam and pouted with a miserable frown.
"He has been doing so well,… and he usually wants to be close once he,… Once he recognizes me again… But,… this time…" Steve swallowed as a tear escaped down cheek and he shrugged helplessly.
"He didn't want me to touch him and he locked himself in the bathroom…" Steve bit his lip as a look of panic danced across his expression. "God,…Sam,… What time is it?... How long has he been in there?... He could be hurting himself!" Steve tried to get up but Natasha pushed him back down as Banner continued to treat the swollen, bloody knuckles of each hand with a gel that formed an artificial layer of skin.
Sergeant Barnes has exited the shower Sir and is getting dressed. He appears calm. Jarvis supplied the update and Steve looked at Sam and then to Natasha.
"I should go check on him… I need to make sure he's alright!" Steve spoke with urgency and Sam exchanged a look with Natasha before speaking.
"Ok Steve,… but first we got to make sure your all right,… You walking up to Bucky right now with blood smeared on your face might not be the best idea.' Sam explained and Steve blinked in confusion before glancing down at his hands and then his disheveled appearance, cover in sweat and blood, pants torn. He swallowed and nodded.
"Yea,… Ok,… I ugh,… I should shower first." He swallowed and nodded.
"You should use the one in here,… I'll go get you some cloths to change into." Natasha commented, squeezing his bicep gently before she stood, again giving Sam a nod, the two understanding that she would check in with Barnes as Sam helped get Steve back into a level head space. She walked past Clint who gave her a grim nod, aware that this situation was delicate and needed to be handled carefully and with respect so that Bucky wouldn't feel more self-conscious and vulnerable then he already was.
"Come on Cap,… a shower to clear your head and then we can debrief." Sam offered his arm as he stood up and Steve used a swollen and bruised hand to pull himself up. With eyes full of emotion, Steve walked past the others with his head down, absorbed in his thoughts. The men watched him exit the gym and go into the locker room before taking a moment to meet each other's eyes.
"Looks like were headed for a rough patch with our senior citizen soldiers." Stark offered with lack luster humor that was a deflection away from the truly horrific nature of the newest trauma to be revealed by Hydra's former Asset.
"We need to be very sensitive around this Stark,… This could set off any number of different PTSD symptoms and we don't want to see him isolate again or go into self-destructive mode." Sam sighed as he wiped his mouth in thought.
"I'll inform the medical team and Dr. Hernadez so they can be prepared." Bruce offered and Sam nodded.
"I'm supposed to deliver an updated status report to Fury and Hill end of the week,… But,…" Hawkeye shook his head with a sigh looking away with a grimace. "If it was me, I wouldn't want this kind of thing written down, I would want it to be buried." He shrugged and shook his head. "Those Hydra freaks are seriously messed up!...Christ what haven't those fascist fucks put Barnes through!" The others each exchange looks with one another before Sam rolled his neck and turned toward the locker room with a deep sigh, pinching the bridge of his noise.
"Man,…I've been working with PTSD vets since I got out of Active Duty." Sam looked up at the Locker room and sighed shaking his head. "Had to work through a lot of my own trauma before I could even start helping my brothers and sisters coming back home from combat zones." He put his hands on his hips and squared his shoulders.
"But the shit these two Soldiers have been through….." Sam looked back over his shoulder at the other Avengers. "I am seriously out of my depth with some of this stuff." The VA counselor huffed and Bruce patted his back with a grim expression, eyes understanding just how much work went into trying to keep a calm and level head when things got intense.
"Just let us know how we can help!" Bruce offered and Sam nodded back before heading toward the locker room to help Steve process and deal with the latest trauma and the subsequent fall out.
End note: So they had all suspected that Bucky had been sexually abused while held captive of Hydra but Steve's reaction and devastation confirm what they had thought. I didn't feel the need for a lot of specifics or details because I don't think Steve or Bucky would want to share that information openly. Also, this story is about recovery not depictions of abuse.